Текст книги "Desertion"
Автор книги: River Savage
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Desertion
A Knights Rebels MC Novel
River Savage
Contents
Copyright
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Epilogue
Also by River Savage
Coming Soon By River Savage
HELP SOMEONE. HELP YOURSELF.
Acknowledgments
About the Author
DESERTION
©2015
First eBook edition: July 2015
Desertion is a work of fiction. All characters, organizations and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously.
All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading and sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.
Edited by Becky Johnson, Hot Tree Editing
Cover design ©: Louisa Maggio at LM Creations
Image: Mofatt Photography
Model: Troy Scott
Information address: [email protected]
There are the men and women whom we should honor everyday for what they do for our countries.
Thank you.
One Jesse
“What’s the first thing you’re going to do, Staff Sergeant?” Corporal Jefferies asks from the back of the Humvee as our convoy makes its way back to base. We just did our last patrol through the city of Kandahar. We've been in Afghanistan for the last six months, six long fucking months and this time next week, we will be heading home. I fucking hate this place, the polluted air, the death, the injustice; it all clouds my judgment.
“Gonna find my ass in the first diner I can find, ordering one of everything off the menu.”
“Of course you are.” Corporal Conner smirks beside me, knowing how much I love a good fucking meal. “I, on the other hand, am gonna bury myself in a tight pussy for days.” He groans and I can’t help but grin at the fucker. “Jesus, I can’t wait. What about you, Jefferies, you ready to see your girl?” Conner continues after radioing our coordinates.
“Got a Dear John from her last week,” Jefferies says, wiping the smile off my face. Fuck.
“Fuck, man, that’s rough,” Conner curses and it’s better than what I would say. Fucking bitch.
“Yeah, think she’s been fucking around. Says she needs some time to think.” I shake my head at the fucked-up situation my friend found himself in.
“Well, fuck her. Fuck her and her timing,” Conner says, his eyes still facing the front, still checking our surroundings.
“Yeah, I really thought she was the one for me,” Jefferies says, and I have to hand it to him, the fucker’s been holding out on us, didn’t see it coming at all. Though if I had a woman back home and the bitch sent me a Dear John, I wouldn’t fucking share. Don’t give a fuck how close I am with these fuckers.
“Got some movement at nine o’clock. Stay alert.” The vehicle’s military radio crackles with the convoy leader’s report. I sit a little straighter as the warning comes through.
“Fuck, what’s that? What’s that?” Jefferies’ curses, eyes finding something ahead. I follow his direction and see movement over the ridge.
“Nine o’clock, get on the fifty,” I shout to Jefferies as the first gunshot hits our truck.
“I’ve got—” Conner’s voice repeats our coordinates down the radio but it drowns out as a piercing sound explodes in my ears. A series of flashes break out, distorting my vision before a force hits us, lifting and spreading the horrendous blow of the explosion through the Humvee.
“We’re taking heavy fire!” Jefferies shouts, but my ears feel like they’re stuffed with cotton wool.
“Fuck, keep moving, keep moving,” Jefferies’ voice echoes through the ringing, but Conner’s frozen. Guns drilling, shots thumping, and heart racing, time spins past me as my world breaks down into slow motion. A second explosion to our right shakes us; the ringing in my ears turns into a high-pitched squeal.
“Oh, fuck!” Conner’s panicked voice hits me and I find myself comforting him.
“We’re good, Conner. Get it together. Stay sharp,” I say, watching team two push forward after taking most of the hit. The thick smoke in the air makes everything murky, my senses are on edge, like this is just the beginning.
“RPG, move, move, move,” Jefferies’ shouts and then moves as fast as he can.
“Conner, fucking move or die—” I don’t finish my sentence before the road before us comes up out of the ground, a volcano of orange sand erupts before our eyes, flipping the Humvee up. Yelling fills the air. The realization we’ve been hit takes a minute to register as my body lays distorted in the wreckage of the Humvee. Everything becomes numb. Muffled sounds of gunshots echo around the gnarled vehicle and orders break through.
“Conner,” I shout again, but I don’t even know if he survived.
“Ahhh!” A scream pulls me from the darkness.
“Conner?” I begin to move, but my foot is wedged between two pieces of metal. Everything shifts as the world comes back to focus. Screaming breaks through the numbness, and the pain radiating through my body anchors me to my spot.
“My fucking leg! I can’t feel my leg, Sarge. It’s fucking gone!”
I twist to get my eyes on him, but pull back when I see his leg hanging at an unnatural angle.
“You’re gonna be okay, Conner,” I shout over the sounds of attack, over the sounds of his screams, praying and hoping my words can calm him.
“I’m gonna fucking die. I’m gonna fucking die.”
We’re stuck in the kill zone. I don’t fucking know if we’re going to be okay, if we’re going to survive, but I can’t tell him that.
“Motherfucker.” My body jolts awake at the sound of Conner’s words. Fuck, not this fucking dream again.
“Jesse?” A warm hand touches my shoulder, and instantly, I’m on alert. Twisting my body, I reach out and grab the owner of the voice by the neck as the steady beat of their pulse thumps beneath my fingertips. It takes me a few deep breathes to realize I’m not back in Afghanistan, but at home, in my bed. The young woman’s throat I have my fingers wrapped around is not the enemy, but the bitch I took to bed.
“Fuck, sorry, sweetheart.” I release my grip and my eyes move to her throat, watching it constrict as she drags a large breath through her mouth.
“What the hell, Jesse?” She holds her neck, wheezing past her words. I rub my face in an attempt to erase the memories of the dream. Memories which can’t be un-seen.
“You okay?” I finally look up. Her dark hair covers her face, so I can’t see how scared she is. Not that this bothers me; their faces mean nothing to me. All I care about is fucking them and watching them leave.
“Yeah, but I should go.” She moves to the edge of the bed, the soft light from my bathroom highlights the arch of her back. Fuck, she has an amazing body. Shifting my body closer to hers, my finger reaches out and follows the curve. I should let her go. Having her in my bed is a bad fucking idea. I should never let them stay for this reason, but the fucked-up part of me doesn’t want to be alone. Even if I did just try to strangle her.
“What was the dream about?” She stops her retreat and turns to look at me. I roll back over and pull her to me. My hunger to get lost in a tight pussy builds, and the more questions she asks, my need to bury the past grows stronger
“Less talk and more fucking, sweetheart.” I take her mouth and instantly she molds to me. I fucking love bitches like this. It helps me deal with the fucked-up shit I’ve done. The fucked-up shit I’ve seen. It might not be the right therapy, but it’s my only therapy.
“Put your hands around my neck again.” Whatever-her-name-is demands as I slide on the third condom of the night.
“You want me to strangle you while I fuck you?”
“Yes,” she moans and my cock aches in anticipation. Fucking hell yes.
Jesus. I’m so fucked up. I even manage to find bitches who love my kind of fucked up.
Two BELL
“Damn, girl, you are getting looks tonight.” My best friend Lissy bumps her shoulder into mine as we stand at the bar waiting for our drinks. I look around the club and feel myself sink into my own skin, wishing she wouldn’t put any ideas in my head. I hate the thought of people looking at me.
“I’m pretty sure it’s you they’re looking at.” I look down at her painted-on jeans and skintight top, and hold back my eye roll. The woman is kidding herself if she thinks these men are looking at me over her.
“That’s because you don’t know how amazing you are, Bell.” I return her smile but don’t comment. It’s best this way. It’s always this way with Lissy and me. She thinks I’m beautiful and I think she is crazy.
“So what did you tell your mom you were doing tonight?” She hands the bartender a fifty with a wink. He beams a white tooth smile back, which only pushes her dimples to come out to play. She turns back to me, grinning like a fool, and I shake my head. Oh, to be carefree like Lissy. If only I had her attitude.
“Bell?” Lissy presses, flipping her long red curls over her shoulder and narrowing her eyes on me.
“I told them I was at your house for the night.” I swallow past the bad taste left in my mouth from my lies. I don’t like lying to my mom, but if I want to live some kind of normal life, or as normal as I can live with a mother like mine, a lie will have to suffice.
“You know this whole situation is ridiculous, right, Bell?” We take our drinks and move back to the table where our friends wait.
“Don’t start tonight, Lissy,” I beg, handing Manda, my other best friend, her drink before taking a seat.
“What is she starting tonight?” Manda’s twin sister, Kate, asks as she takes her drink from Lissy.
“Bell told her mom we were having a sleepover,” Lissy spills and I have to stop myself from kicking her under the table. Lissy has been my best friend since high school. She might think what she is doing is looking out for me, but she’s not. She doesn’t get my situation. I wouldn’t want her to either; but where Lissy is strong, confident and loud, I’m shy, reserved and quiet. I can’t just tell my parents I’m done playing their rules and then not care if they don’t agree. It’s different for her. For all of them.
“Guys, can we not go there tonight?” I look over at Kate and I pray she has my back. Kate is more like me—happy to keep the peace—but most of the time will come to my defense.
“We’re just worried.” Manda gives her opinion and now I know I’m in trouble. Once Manda weighs in, there is no stopping the rest of them.
“I know, guys, but what do you expect me to do?” I ask a little too loudly. I look around making sure no one is watching us.
I wasn’t expecting to come out tonight. But Lissy and Manda insisted we go out for my birthday. I thought we were talking about movies and dinner. Not Liquid, the hottest nightclub in Rushford. I’m way out of my league here and my girls know it.
“You can start by telling your parents you’re not your sister. You can’t live in her shadow for the rest of your life. You’re twenty-three years old for Christ’s sake, Bell.” Lissy shakes her head, working herself up. I know she means well, all my friends do, but it’s easy for them to say. They don’t live with what I live with every day. Feeling my mood get dragged down, I force myself to take a breath and let the ugly feelings, which always appear when talking about my sister, wash over me.
“Guys, it’s Bell’s night. Let’s not go there,” Kate comes to my rescue, finally. I smile over at her, a silent thank you, but it’s too late; Lissy has already gone there, and once she starts, then there’s no stopping her.
“We’re just worried,” she begins, but I can’t let her get to me, not tonight.
“Excuse me.” I stand from my chair needing to escape. I know when they tell me they are worried they mean it. I get it. I do, but my situation is something I can’t control. I can’t control that one of my sisters is missing, taken from us without a trace, and in turn, my mother keeps me on a tight leash. Nor can I explain how I allow it all to happen. When it comes to my family, I can’t say no or bring them disappointment, because if I do, I’ll only bring more pain. To everyone involved.
“Don’t leave. We didn’t mean anything by it.” Manda reaches out and takes my wrist, dragging me back down. I take another breath and calm myself.
“Well, what did you mean?” I ask, my confidence shaken by the truth of their concerns.
“Bell, we just want what’s best for you.” Lissy takes my other hand and I don’t pull away. I need her strength to stop myself from breaking down.
“I don’t expect you to understand, guys, because if I’m honest, sometimes I don’t understand. But I do expect you to respect my wishes. My family might not be conventional but they’re the only one I have.” I take another breath, my attempt to calm down is failing. I hate that this is what it comes to when we talk about my family, or bring up Paige. I hate that I can’t live a normal life like them, but I can’t change the past. I can’t move on. I’m stuck. Stuck in a nightmare of what my life has become. And when they bring it all up again, I’m reminded just how screwed up the situation is.
“I’m sorry, girl.” Lissy squeezes my hand again when she notices the tears start to come. “I shouldn’t have pushed.” I nod and accept her apology. The last thing we need tonight is a fight over Paige.
“It’s okay. Can we just drop it?” I ask, hoping we can get back to where we were.
“Back to birthday drinks.” Kate nods, following my lead. I deliver a press-on smile and point it at my friends. It feels wrong, but I have to do what I have to do.
“Good evening, ladies,” the smooth sound of a male voice brings the table’s conversation to a halt and I’m thankful for the reprieve so I can compose myself. “I just wanted to come over and say hi.” Something makes me freeze. I know that voice.
Lissy drops my hand while Manda’s grip tightens, her eyes bugging out at the owner of the familiar voice coming from behind me. Something about it resonates within me but I can’t quite put my finger on it. I take another deep breath and discreetly try to wipe my eyes.
“Hi.” Lissy extends her hand across the table first, and from the corner of my eye, a tanned arm reaches out and takes hers.
“Are you enjoying yourselves tonight, ladies?” Mystery Voice asks and I watch my friends’ faces light up at his question. I could just turn around and see where I know it from, but I know my face will be red from my rant only a few moments ago.
“Well, it’s our girl’s birthday.” Manda points to me and my body slides down in my chair. They are about to throw me under the bus with this guy, and I’m so not ready for this.
“Oh, is it?” Mystery Voice asks, his voice unbelievably sexy, and I force myself not to turn from pure stubbornness. My friends all nod, smiling up at him. Jesus, I can’t believe these girls. “And does the birthday girl have a name?” His hand rests on the back of my chair, and I feel his warmth teasing my skin. I refuse to look, even if my body wants to turn, but after a nudge from Manda, and an enthusiastic nod from Lissy, I slowly turn and catch the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. Bluest eyes I have seen before.
“You.” I slump in my chair when his grin takes over his face. Why did it have to be him? Jesse Carter. Knights Rebels MC crew member. Sexy, dangerous, and if I’m being honest, funny as all hell. I barely know the man, but he gets under my skin like no other.
“I knew it was you, Nurse Bell.” He winks then pulls up a chair next to me, inviting himself into our circle.
“You know each other?” Kate asks, looking from me to Jesse.
“No,” I reply, folding my arms over my chest. I mean I know him, but not know him, know him.
“Yes.” Jesse knocks my shoulder with his larger frame and I nearly fall out of my chair. “Oh, shit, sorry.” His fingers wrap around my arm, pulling me back and stopping me from falling. I try to tug out of his grasp when he rights me in my chair, but his hold is too strong.
“Let go,” I hiss, searching for a spot on his face I can dislike. It’s a hard task when the man is this damn good looking.
Too good looking.
His disheveled blond hair is a long, overgrown mess, but somehow, he still makes it look good. Maybe it’s the tanned skin, or the smile that always takes over his face, but if you were to look at him from his shoulders up, he looks like he belongs in a magazine. But then he has to go and open his mouth and ruin my lust filled craze.
Jesse Carter is crass, foul mouthed and paired with his dangerous body and the fact he is in a biker gang, the man is serious bad-boy territory. From his tactless lines, to the way he wears his Rebels’ cut, Jesse spells trouble. Trouble I don’t need, especially when just looking at him has my cheeks flaring with warmth. I’m a fumbling child when I’m around him and after the few times I have been in his presence, I seem to get worse.
“Come on, Nurse Bell, you know me. Hell, you saw my ass last time.” He throws my girls his devilish grin, one that obviously works going by their expressions. Heat floods my face, and down the front of me, and I don’t need to look down at my chest to see a blush start to form. Damn it, why do I have to be so awkward?
“You’ve seen him naked?” Lissy spits out her drink and looks at me like I’ve grown a second head.
“Umm, well, not technically,” I fumble to explain as everyone waits, while staring holes into my face. “Mr. Carter here was a patient at the hospital a couple of months back,” I explain, but I don’t think they are listening, still caught on the word naked and visions of Jesse.
“What does ‘not technically’ mean?” Manda pushes, proving my point. Instead of answering, I look to the troublemaker for some help. I have no idea why; he’s the one who just put me in this spot.
“I think she means, when she saw my naked ass, she closed those big, green eyes of hers and refused to look.” Jesse laughs and I feel my face burn again, this time in embarrassment. Great, just what I need, them knowing I acted like some inexperienced virgin.
The first time I ever met Jesse was last year. His club took over the hospital when two of their women came in badly injured. It was touch and go for both, Holly and Kadence. Holly came in with a gunshot wound, and Kadence with a punctured lung. At first I was taken back by Jesse’s inappropriate lines and dangerous smile. I mean his friends were in hospital recovering from some serious injuries and he was trying to hit on me. I soon came to realize it’s just who he is.
My second encounter with Jesse went down the same way. He was admitted after being in a bar fight that ended with twenty-four stitches and a busted up foot that needed surgery. From what I’ve gathered, he stepped in and helped Holly from being attacked by a crazed man. Holly suffered a fall, but Jesse took the brunt of it all. Still didn’t stop him from hitting on me.
“Oh, my God why the hell would you close your eyes, Bell?” Lissy asks pulling me out of the memory. Jesse turns and fires a smile at her question and I die a little more. If only he knew I peeked. A little.
“What?” I shake my head, trying to get myself together. Having Jesse in my space, outside of work, is messing with me.
“Yes, much to my disappointment, Nurse Bell doesn’t appreciate a fine ass when one is staring her in the face,” Jesse further jokes, and I can tell he’s enjoying this way too much. I might not know the man very well, but what I do know is he likes to push the boundaries. With the handful of times I’ve been around him, I know he thrives off pushing everyone’s buttons.
“Well, who said it was fine?” I counter, even shocking myself as the words leave my mouth. It’s all lies. His well-defined ass is an image that flashes in my mind on a regular basis. I just don’t need him to know that.
“Ahhh, there she is,” he replies, and I groan knowing my slip has only stirred the bad boy in this man. I reach for Manda’s vodka and throw it back. My body instantly warms as I ignore not only the burning sensation coating my throat, but Jesse as well. This is the last thing I need tonight, him messing with me, so I decide to go back to ignoring him. My friends were already on my back about my mom, but now… now their eyes are growing wide, that me, simple, quiet Bell knows a man like Jesse.
“Umm, that wasn’t lemonade.” Manda smirks, knowing I don’t drink, but I don’t respond. I keep my face blank, pretending the taste of the alcohol is fine and I’m not secretly wishing I could wash away the taste of the vile liquid with water.
“How’s your ankle?” I turn back to Jesse, forgetting my plan to ignore him. His face shuts down at the question, his body tense under my stare.
“Wanna dance?” he answers with his own question, leaning into my space. As much as I want to turn and not get lost in his presence, I can’t take my eyes off him.
“I don’t dance.” I swallow hard past my dry throat.
“You don’t dance?” Jesse laughs not believing me. “Everyone dances, Bell.”
“Oh, she doesn’t do a lot of things,” Manda answers for me. I try to kick her under the table but somehow end up kicking Lissy. Shit.
“Why the hell did you kick me?” Lissy complains, leaning forward and rubbing her shin.
“I’m sorry.” I look down at my lap, half wanting the floor to open up and swallow me, and half wanting to break out in laughter. Could this get any more awkward?
I don’t even know what’s wrong with me. I hardly know this man, and I feel like I’m back in high school, and Kyle Granger just came and sat down at our table.
“You playing hard to get makes me want to get you a whole lot more.” Jesse stands, moving closer to me. I force myself not to look up and be drawn into his dangerous charm. But my efforts are lost when he leans down closer into my space and whispers in my ear, “I’m all for a game, Bell, but I gotta know what I’m playing for.” A shiver runs through me as his lips slightly graze the shell of my ear. “That’s it, sweetheart, you feel it too. Be a whole lot easier if you just surrendered now.” His hot breath warms my skin, and for reasons unknown to me, a small, pained moan leaves my lips. He steps back and smirks down at me, like he’s proud of his accomplishment, while my heart beats rapidly in my chest. What is happening here?
“Holy shit,” one of my girls whispers beside me, pulling me from my daze. My head sweeps over to them, and the small pink blush coating Manda’s cheeks tells me this is bad. So bad.
Jesse Carter is dangerous. His words are his weapons, and when up against him, I’m left unarmed.
I clear my throat and hold my stomach. The sudden urge to do things I’ve never done before starts drumming in my subconscious. What the hell is it with this man? Momma always said don’t let a man’s words affect you, but with Jesse, there’s no control. I need to stay strong, just like the other few times he has tried his lines on me.
“Mr. Carter, whatever game you think I’m playing, I’m not. I’m just me, no one special and I don’t play games. I promise you.” I stand, needing space. I ignore the loss of his heat when he steps back, and I ignore the stunned looks on my friends’ faces. Instead, I dip my head, keep my eyes on my feet and walk as fast as I can away from the table.
“Okay, Bell, you win. I don’t chase,” he shouts out after me, but I’m too shaken to respond. I push my way through the crowd, hoping whatever just happened, never happens again. I’ve never had a reaction like this to anyone before, why does it have to be him?
I know he thinks I’m playing a game, but I have no idea what he’s talking about. What I do know is Jesse Carter is in the big leagues and I’m nowhere near ready for a round.
Not even close.
