Текст книги "Avoiding Commitment"
Автор книги: K. A. Linde
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Текущая страница: 5 (всего у книги 29 страниц)
CHAPTER 4
AUGUST FIVE YEARS EARLIER
Flashes of silver light careened around the open dance floor sending blurred, refracting images across the wide-eyed girls shaking their bodies in time with the rap beats blaring from the projection speakers. Saturday night at Chamber showcased incredible DJ spinning talent, and for the sea of wall-to-wall listeners nothing could get better. Several bartenders distributed lethal quantities of whatever one’s heart desired in alcohol. The medium-sized rectangular room was divided in two by sliding glass doors keeping the dance space and the more secluded lounge area separated. A raised platform designed in an L-shape was constructed against one wall and had a long bar against the open side.
Beefy security guards in bright yellow Chamber polo’s remained stationed in precarious locations as a rather deliberate reminder for the drunkards to keep their cool. One too many customers had found themselves sprawled on their ass on the pavement outside after a fight broke out or the Fire Marshall deemed the building to be over the maximum occupancy.
“I need six lemon drops, three Bud Lights, two Jager bombs, and an Amaretto sour,” Trina demanded of the tiny red headed bartender. The girl looked frantic pulling random bottles off the shelf and replacing them almost instantly. She grabbed several shot glasses placing them haphazardly on the bar before glancing up at her customer helplessly.
“How many shots did you want?” the girl asked her voice coming out mousy.
Trina rolled her eyes exaggeratedly. “Honey, why are you working the busiest night of the week if you can’t take an order? I said six.”
A blush crept up across her cheeks and down her neck. “I…uh…” the girl stammered not anticipating the harassment.
“I mean really, what was Joe thinking hiring someone so incompetent?” Trina questioned her further leaning forward against the bar. Her eyes were locked with the mouse who looked terrified. Several of the surrounding customers glanced anxiously over at Trina. Some just looked angry that she was taking up so much time with the only bartender in the vicinity. A small blond girl standing to her right nudged her lightly in the ribs giving her a shut the fuck up look. Trina didn’t even register the jab. She was smiling, instead, at the girl behind the bar. “What’s your name sweetheart?”
“Mary,” she said fumbling with the bottle opener. Mary, getting even more flustered, managed to drop the metal opener. She quickly ducked down to retrieve it.
Trina smirked at the girl maliciously. “Seems like you are better suited for church… Mary,” she said dragging her name out. The girl just glanced up meekly, not even able to form words. Her eyes were beginning to well with unshed tears.
“Trina, stop being such a bitch,” another girl said materializing next to the redhead. The voluptuous bartender scooted Mary to the side with her hip and began expertly filling the order.
Trina’s smile widened at the sight. “Chasity, I thought I would have to break your newbie before you got over here. What took you so long?”
“I’d like to remind you that you are underage darling,” Chasity quipped pushing the beers across the counter. “Might I also point out,” she said thrusting the bottle opener into the back pocket of her micro-mini jean skirt and leaning into one hip, “that three-fourths of the people in the room know that.”
Mary’s eyes bulged. “Oh my God, Chasity, I had no idea. I wouldn’t have served her if I’d known.”
Chasity rolled her eyes at the girl. “We don’t ID at the bar silly girl, just at the door.” Mary’s blush returned in full force. “Anyway, you should recognize Trina here as one of our All-American gymnasts.”
“Thanks for the introduction. Why not add a lemon drop to that order for yourself and little Mary too,” Trina said fishing out her credit card and passing it to Chasity who stuffed it into her red bra strap. Chasity added two more glasses to the counter and began filling them with clear liquid. Trina held a shot over her head beckoning the couple off the dance floor.
Lexi brushed her side-swept bangs off her glistening forehead as she made her way to Trina and the rest of the group. Trina smiled as she approached, a shot appearing in front of Lexi’s face. “For you, my dear,” she said passing her the drink.
Lexi reached forward to extract another shot from the bar and passed it to the guy standing behind her before diving back in and retrieving two sugar-coated lemon slices. The eight people in attendance smacked their glasses against one another and downed the contents feeling the familiar burn of vodka. Quickly inserting the lemon slice into her mouth, Lexi felt the dizzying effects of the alcohol, even stumbling a little. “Ugh,” she groaned leaning back against the guy’s shoulder, “I can’t feel my legs. Is that bad?”
He wrapped his arm around her tiny waist securing her in place. “Don’t worry. I gotcha.”
“I know you do,” she said nuzzling her nose into his neck affectionately.
He jumped upon contact. “Damn. Your nose is freezing. How are you that cold?” he asked breaking away from her. She shrugged leaning forward against Trina’s chair.
“Who’s the new girl?” Lexi asked nodding towards the red headed bartender.
“Mary,” Trina said cocking her head sideways as she studied the girl. “Chasity was just introducing her to me.”
Lexi’s head shot up at the name. Her head swiveled around the bar expecting to catch a glimpse of very familiar dark brown hair and piercing blue eyes. No matter how many times she came to Chamber, she had the same reaction at the mention of Chasity. After all, Jack had been a regular of hers at one point in time.
“Hey, Lex,” Chasity said winking at her. Lexi’s heart skipped at the casual use of the nickname that she had never really allowed anyone else to call her after. “I was actually just chastising Trina for acting like a bitch to Mary here. You’re on the team, right? You should learn to keep her under control.” Chasity swirled her hips in time with the music looking all the more sensual for her adoring customers. She flipped a bottle of whiskey three or four times experimentally in her hands before tipping it upside down and emptying it into a glass brimming with cubed ice.
“Oh no, I’m not on the team,” Lexi corrected hastily. “I just practice with them.”
Last semester, Lexi had received an email from Krista, the captain of the gymnastics team, asking if she was available to attend a meeting with the coach. Lexi had thought it was a cruel joke. She had only told one person about her desire to be on the gymnastics team, and well, she hadn’t spoken with him since that fateful night in October. Her response had been dripping with sarcasm and questions in regards to the real sender. Krista had instantly responded that in no way was she joking about the offer, but that if she wasn’t interested then to forget it. As fast as she could get a reply out, Lexi apologized and agreed to the meeting.
Krista met her at the entrance to the athletic training facility. She was petite, even compared to Lexi, with stick straight brown hair to her shoulders covered in red and blonde highlights. A distinct hole in her eyebrow, nose, and lip showed where piercings were beginning to close up. An old, destroyed, university, warm up shirt hung loosely on her tiny frame sliding off one shoulder and allowing her bellybutton ring to peek out from underneath. The elastic of her grey sweatpants had been cut off so that they barely hung on her narrow hips. Lexi liked her already.
The meeting with the coach went surprisingly well considering the fact that the lady had been characterized as the epitome of bitchiness. Shortly afterwards, they had set up some time on the mat, and Lexi had wowed them into allowing her to practice with them. It had been like a dream come true. The only thing that could have made it better was if they allowed her to compete. She wasn’t going to hold her breath for that though.
Lexi had been fortunate enough to begin training out that same week. The first day at practice she met the guy standing behind her. Spencer was a student athletic trainer for the gymnastics team that season. He frequently attended practices to prepare him for meets.
After successfully completing her first practice, Lexi’s entire body felt physically assaulted. Seeing the amount of pain she was already in, Spencer had pulled her to the side and offered to do post-stretch work outs with her to soothe her aching muscles. At first, she had turned him down thinking she didn’t need it, but when she found she could hardly make it to the locker room, he had insisted. He nursed her over-used muscles making sure that she hadn’t done any serious damage.
Then after proclaiming her fit, he had nervously asked her out that same day. Agreeing to the offer was a no brainer, and they had been dating ever since. Seven months later their relationship was still going strong.
“No one can keep Trina under control especially if she is trying to make up for Krista’s absence,” Lexi said leaning back from the bar and glancing up into Spencer’s warm chocolate-colored orbs staring lovingly down upon her. His dark blonde hair was buzzed so short it was almost military official with just enough in the front to spike up. Cheek bones were prominent against his pale skin; a strong square-set jaw line fit perfectly with the rest of his features.
“And no one can make up for Krista,” Chasity said flipping the tops off several beer bottles.
“She’s probably glad to have graduated,” Trina commented. Lexi narrowed her eyes at her. Trina had been making similar comments since she had been named captain. “What?” she asked defensively. “I just mean that now she doesn’t have to take her piercings out every January.”
The group laughed along at Trina’s joke. Lexi found she could only produce a forced half-smile. She really did miss Krista, and her spontaneous vivacious personality that seemed to light up any room. As soon as she had graduated, Krista had hightailed it out of town. She had ended up in Las Vegas and was now performing nightly at some Cirque de Soleil show. The team wouldn’t be the same without her.
Lexi pulled her phone out of her tiny black purse to see if anyone else from the team had responded to her mass text. Sighing, she looked at the blank screen. “Guess everyone else is busy tonight,” she mumbled under her breath.
Then, her phone vibrated in her hand. Lexi perked up and wondered who else was coming out. She flipped her phone open and stared numbly at the name that flashed onto the screen: Jack Howard.
Lexi quickly glanced backwards at Spencer. He was occupied by Ashley, a blonde leggy gymnast in her third year. She had never mentioned anything about Jack to him before. Even if he had seen the name, it wouldn’t have meant anything to him. Despite that fact, she angled her body to block his view of the screen.
She was unsure whether or not she should click the little green button to view the message. He had contacted her several times shortly after he had confessed to having a girlfriend. However, he had ceased his attempts at contacting her when she didn’t answer a single one. It had been difficult, of course. She had wanted to reply. After all, she had fallen head over heels for the boy, but she couldn’t share him.
Just enough alcohol coursed through her veins that her finger fell on the button opening the message.
“3 o’clock.”
Lexi stared down at the cryptic text message, confusion written across face. Her brow furrowed together as she tried to decipher the meaning behind his words. The time was 1:30 in the morning. Was she supposed to meet him at 3 o’clock? If so, where was she supposed to meet him? No, that couldn’t be it. He would have said more if he wanted her to meet him, some explanation at least.
3 o’clock.
She stared off into space feeling the alcohol loosen her muscles and continue to cloud her judgment. Then, as if woken from a dream, she turned slowly. There he was. Sitting at the end of the bar, beer in hand, at her 3 o’clock.
He raised his glass to her as if to say cheers. She couldn’t take her eyes off of him. He looked so good. She had almost forgotten how his shaggy hair fell messily into his eyes. The natural way he jerked his head to uselessly move it out of the way...only to have it fall back into his amazing blue eyes. The way his smile warmed her inside out.
“Want to go back out on the floor?” Spencer asked breaking her out of her trance. She averted her eyes and snapped her phone shut.
Lexi shook her head. “I’m going to stay here and wait until I can stand straight. You can go ahead,” she offered. She had never lied to him before, and she didn’t particularly like it. But if Jack was here, she wanted nothing less than for them to cross paths.
“Alright,” Spencer said a little reluctantly. “Are you sure?”
“Don’t worry about me. I think Ashley needs someone to dance with,” she said gesturing towards the tiny blonde gymnast waiting patiently for them to come to a decision.
He shrugged and went to kiss her on her lips. She turned at the last second letting it brush her cheek. He glanced down at her, a glimpse of pain evident in his eyes. A forced smile moved across her face, but she knew he wasn’t satisfied with that.
“I’ll check on you in a bit,” he said finally before making his way back towards the mass of bodies. Lexi leaned back against Trina’s chair and rested her head on Trina’s shoulder. She didn’t want to chance a glance back up for fear that Jack would still be there—or worse—he’d be gone.
“Don’t you dare fall asleep on me,” Trina said bumping Lexi off her shoulder.
“I’m not. Swear.”
“Well, take my chair. I’m going to go dance. You better not be asleep when I get back,” Trina said pointing her finger in Lexi’s face.
“Have no fear. I’m sure Chasity will take care of everything.”
“I sure hope not with your tolerance,” Trina called over her shoulder laughing as she walked away.
Lexi watched her friends meander through the crowd of people. As soon as she lost them in the mass, Lexi turned her head, and searched for Jack again. There he was, seated in the exact same spot, waiting for her. Without really realizing what she was doing, she stood and made her way to him. As she approached, she fully assessed him. Stubble had grown in across his chin and jaw line making him appear older. The blue vertical striped button-up he wore brought out the ice blue of his eyes. He seemed even more fit than the last time she had seen him, but she couldn’t be sure under all those clothes. Not that she was thinking of taking them off…of course.
She smiled slyly trying to keep from letting her eyes roam his body further. She wasn’t sure how she had forgotten how attractive he was. His gaze met hers. She felt as if he was looking straight through her. A blush rushed up her neck and to her cheeks. She couldn’t decide if the cause was the alcohol or the way he looked at her like he could just take her right then and there.
“Lex,” he said extending an arm out for her to walk into. She did the motion automatically, feeling herself fit against his body like she was the missing puzzle piece. His cologne overpowered her senses, and she hastily backed up a few paces remembering the last time he had been this close to her. Her groin throbbed at the recollection of his knee resting in that same spot. Something about that smell…about him just made her hot all over.
His look of desire hadn’t changed despite her speedy retreat. She knew that he shouldn’t be looking at her like that. She definitely shouldn’t be having this type of reaction in a very crowded, public place with her boyfriend only a hundred feet away. Anyone could walk over and see them together. It’s not like anyone could mistake the looks that were cast between them.
“Um…how are you?” she asked awkwardly averting her eyes attempting to break his spell.
He shrugged nonchalantly. “Single.”
Her body tensed at the statement. That hadn’t been her question, but for some reason it was the answer she had wanted, the real question she had been anxious to find out about. “Oh yeah?” she asked trying to remain cool and not let her heart beat speed up any further at the prospect of him being single. “How did that happen?”
“As a birthday present to myself.”
She scoffed, her eyes bulging. “Are you serious?”
He smiled brightly. “One hundred percent.”
“That’s a story I’d like to hear.”
“I’d like to tell it to you,” he said standing up and closing the distance between them. Her breath caught in her throat. “Come be with me tonight.”
He issued it as a command not a request. And God, did she want to be with him that night. Her mind slowly started to catch up with her wanton body, and she began to shake her head wishing his request had come some six or seven months earlier. “No, I can’t.”
Stepping just a few inches closer, he pressed his hips against her. She sucked in a good deal of air. His fingers found her palms and gently stroked upwards. When he reached her shoulder, he redirected his movement downward slowly but deliberately grabbing her hips and pressing himself against her.
“Jack,” she moaned, glancing back up into his baby blues. Involuntarily, her eyes moved to his lips and back up.
“Come be with me,” he repeated himself.
She reached her hands up and pushed lightly against his chest, giving herself a few inches of space. He didn’t pull his hands away from where they rested on her hips. “I said that I can’t,” the words came out feebler than before.
“I heard you,” he said licking his lips.
“I should um…probably get going actually.”
“Mmm hmm.” But still she didn’t move away from him. She felt his thumb make a small circle on her exposed hipbone. Just as his finger met the hemline of her skirt, she backed up roughly running into a large woman seated at the bar.
“Sorry,” she said skirting around the woman and entering open space to the right. Her eyes shifted back to Jack. “I haven’t heard from you in a long time.”
He shrugged. “I was letting your cold shoulder thaw.” Her head jerked to the side and she puffed out angrily. All of a sudden, she felt his cool fingertips graze her neck. They moved to her chin and gently forced her to look back in his face. “I’ve missed you, Lex.”
She seriously thought that her heart stopped in that instance. “Jack, this isn’t fair.”
“I don’t want it to be fair,” he said not letting her chin go, but taking another step towards her, invading her personal space.
The words kept filtering through her consciousness. She knew she should probably tell him. She should say it right now. There was no way she wanted to do the same thing that he had done to her. She had a boyfriend for Christ’s sake. A real boyfriend. Someone she had been dating for close to seven months. Things were so good. She should really tell him right there. “Well, you’ve accomplished that,” she said, ignoring her conscience.
He snaked his other hand up and threaded his fingers through her hair. “I saw that guy,” he said trying to make it easier on her.
She knew she should tell him right there. She gulped. “Yeah?” She was having trouble thinking with his hand running through her hair.
“What’s his deal?”
“I thought you didn’t want things to be fair,” she said smarting off to him.
He smirked arching an eyebrow as if to say fine play it that way.
She had no idea what she was doing. There was no way that this would end well. Her friends could return at any moment. If they walked over and saw her close to sexing it up with some apparent stranger, she had no idea what she would do. She had no idea what Spencer would think or do, and she didn’t want to find out.
“Then you won’t mind if I do this,” he said his head dipping down to plant a kiss on her lips.
She froze watching his descent as if in slow motion. Her eyes started to flutter close and she could almost taste him just as her mind finally kicked in. “I don’t want to lie to you, Jack,” she murmured feeling his breath hot on her mouth.
“Well seeing as you’ve said next to nothing, doesn’t seem like you’re lying to me,” he said suspended before her waiting for her to continue.
“We both know that not saying something can be just as much of a lie,” she reminded him.
“Well, what aren’t you saying?” he asked backing up just enough to look deeply into her dark brown eyes.
“That guy is my boyfriend.”
He didn’t back away. In fact, he didn’t move at all. His hand had stilled on the back of her head; the other had moved affectionately to the soft spot under her jaw line. He just stared at her with those ice blue eyes. After that brief pause, his hand started working through her hair again almost like he hadn’t even heard what she had said.
“Jack…did you…”
“Yes.”
“Then why…”
“Because I want to, and I’ve wanted to for too damn long.”
She loved his forcefulness even though she knew she shouldn’t. He should have backed away by now, apologized for interfering with her relationship, and then immediately left her if not the premises. But he didn’t.
Sighing heavily, she spoke again, “It’s not that simple.” She reluctantly took a step backwards. Gently, she extracted his hand from her hair, and moved it back to his side. His other hand followed.
“You’re the one making it complicated.”
“Me?!” she exclaimed. “You’re the one doing that.”
“Doing what?”
“I don’t know. Just that. That thing you do.”
“Oh, how original. Doing that thing you do?” he asked mocking her.
“You know what I mean.”
“I have a feeling that I don’t.”
“Oh Jack,” she groaned crossing her arms over her chest. “We can’t do this again.”
“I’m not sure what this is, but it feels very different then whatever was last time.”
“It’s different, because I know the truth,” she said bitterly.
“I promised I’d never lie to you again, and I meant it,” he said trying to bridge the distance she had put between them.
As if they were in some synchronized dance, she moved with him. When he stepped forward, she stepped back not giving him any room to touch her again. If he touched her, she would be lost. “You can’t just say that. How can I believe you?”
“I hardly expect you to.” She narrowed her eyes waiting for the catch. “But I plan to make it up to you.”
She liked the sound of that. “How do you plan on doing that?” she asked cocking her head to the side and trying to keep the flirtation out of her voice, but damn that was hard to do.
“I’ve got a few ideas,” he said, a smirk appearing on his face. “I think you’ll like them.”
“I’m sure I would,” she mumbled, images of him kissing her senseless appearing before her eyes.
“I think we’re back to square one. Why don’t you come and stay with me tonight?” She looked helplessly up at him. He could tell that he was wearing her down. She wanted to say yes.
Just then a hand snaked around her waist from behind and a head nuzzled into her neck. “Hey babe, I’ve been looking for you all over. I thought you were going to stay at the bar,” Spencer said leaving one last kiss on her neck before straightening and turning towards her.
She stared at him dumbstruck. “I…uh,” Lexi stammered.
“Did Chasity give you anything else?” he asked with concern evident in his voice. “You’re not going to be sick are you?”
“Oh, well…” she began fumbling for words. “I just ran into a friend.”
Spencer glanced up and looked around completely ignoring Jack who was standing directly in front of them. “Where did she go?”
Lexi couldn’t help laughing out loud. “No, no, this is my friend,” she said gesturing to Jack, but being careful not to touch him as she directed Spencer’s attention towards him.
He glanced at Jack uncomfortably. She could tell that Spencer wasn’t too happy that this was her friend, but regardless he stuck his hand out. “I’m Spencer.”
Jack took his hand in his own and gave a quick squeeze. Lexi saw the smirk cross his face. “Jack.”
Spencer looked between Jack and Lexi awkwardly. “Sorry if I was looking for a chick, but, well, I don’t think I’ve ever heard her mention you before.”
“Not surprising. We haven’t seen each other in a really long time,” Jack said. “Anyway, I’ve got to get out of here. My friends were just heading out when I ran into you. I’m gonna go catch up with them.”
“Alright. Nice meeting you, man,” Spencer said putting a deliberately protective arm across Lexi’s shoulders.
“Likewise, I’m sure,” Jack responded, that smirk never leaving his face. “I’ll see you around, Lex.”
She watched his departing back, sad that he didn’t even give her a backwards glance. Had that really just happened? She couldn’t be sure, but all of a sudden she felt terribly uncomfortable in Spencer’s grasp.
“I thought you didn’t like being called Lex,” Spencer said turning to face her and sliding his other arm around her.
Lexi smiled. “I don’t.”
