Текст книги "Beautiful Misery"

Автор книги: Chandin Whitten

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Текущая страница: 5 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

Shrugging she mumbled, “It’s your money. Get what you want.”

The lighthearted Cobie was gone. Back was the short, cold Cobie.

Placing my fingers under her chin I raised her head to look at me. “No. You listen to me, this is for us. For our baby. I want you happy too.”

She snorted and said, “You want me happy? Then stop making everything awkward. Everything doesn’t have to be turned into some sexual innuendo. This is hard enough with all your smartass remarks. I understand this isn’t easy for you either and you would much rather be out partying, screwing anything with a vagina, but you picked to be here. I didn’t force you.”

Mentally I counted to ten before replying through gritted teeth. “I know I picked to be here and I would do it again, over and over. This is just as hard on me as it is you. Neither one of us pictured things happening like this but it did. This is how I deal. I make dumbass remarks and say stupid shit. I don’t mean anything by it, Cobie. Honestly, I just wanted to make you laugh. If I woulda known it would upset you I woulda kept my damn mouth shut.” Using my free hand I picked up her hand. “If we want this thing between us to work then we both need to talk. We need to communicate. When I piss you off you can’t just shut down. Tell me. And when you’re being a pain in my ass I will let you know.”

Cobie shifted her eyes between mine. She pulled her bottom lip into her mouth, trapping it between her teeth. “I just don’t want you to feel trapped.”

Rolling my eyes, I sighed. “I don’t feel trapped. When will you get that through your damn head?” Cobie lifted one shoulder but said nothing. Wanting to lighten the mood I asked, “So what did you think of this place?”

As soon as I mentioned the house her face lit up. I could see the answer written all over her face, she had loved it but I wanted her to tell me. Fighting back her smile she said, “I liked it. What did you think?”

“I think if you liked it, then this is our new house. I will call Colleen and tell her to send the offer in. If everything goes smoothly we should have the keys in a week or so. Welcome to our new home.”

Both Cobie and I looked out the windshield at the large brick home in front of us. The house that would be ours to raise our child in.

She scrunched her face up. “How can you get the house so fast? Won’t we need to wait on the bank?”

I shook my head. “Nope. I’m paying cash. Cash money, baby.”

Cobie rolled her eyes and said sarcastically, “Of course you are. Why would you need a loan when you are the one and only Gage Tucker?”

Smirking I said, “That would be the one, the only, Gage Motha’ Fuckin’ Tucker.”

Cobie laughed and shook her head. “Call Colleen before your big head explodes.”

Oh man I could say something right now…No! I will be good and not upset her.

“What?”

“Huh?” I asked, confused.

“The look on your face. It was like you wanted to say something but changed your mind.”

How the hell did she know me so well already?

“I did but I decided not to.”

“Why?” Cobie asked. She squinted her eyes like she was trying to figure me out.

“It was dirty.”

Cobie’s eyes went from small slits to the size of saucers. “Oh.”

“Yep. That’s why I decided to just keep my mouth shut.”

Leaning her head back to lay on the head rest she stared out the windshield. “What were you going to say?”

I shook my head. “You get pissed when I say shit like I was thinking. My mouth is shut.”

Turning the car on, the radio came to life. And, damn if Blurred Lines by Robin Thicke wasn’t playing. Both Cobie and I looked at each other.

“Well, ain’t this just perfect?” Cobie asked, sitting up in her seat. She laughed and for the first time she looked comfortable with me.

“It is kinda fitting for us, huh?”

Cobie started singing along. And after a few beats I joined in. She looked relaxed. She looked beautiful. She caught my eye and gave me a huge smile. When the song ended she took a deep breath and sat back.

“So, Tucker, you going to tell me what was going through that head of yours earlier?”

Fine. If she wanted to know, I would tell her.

“You can’t get pissed because you asked for it.”

Cobie nodded and said, “I asked for it before and look where that got us.”

Damn. This girl had so many sides. She seems so quiet and sweet then BAM! She says something totally unlike the Cobie I know.

Giving her my famous ‘Tucker Tease’ smile, as it has been dubbed by the media, I said, “When you talked about my big head exploding, I thought that wasn’t the only big head I had that could explode.”

Cobie swallowed hard. “Well, I guess when it’s true I can’t really argue.”

Raising both my brows I lifted one side of my mouth. “Why, Cobie Nayler, did you just say I have a big dick?”

Cobie’s mouth popped open. “You are incorrigible.”

I shrugged. “Maybe so but that doesn’t change the fact that you just agreed that my dick was big.”

“Will you call Colleen already?”

“Will you answer my question already?”

Cobie wrinkled her nose. “Nope. Now call Colleen.”

Laughing I pulled my phone out and put my car into drive. I called Colleen on our way back to Cobie’s mom’s house. The following morning Colleen called back, informing us that the house was ours and since we were paying cash we would have the keys within days.

Five days later and we had the keys and started moving in, just in time for me to fly back to New York for meetings and a photo shoot for GQ.

7

Cobie

I rolled to my side trying to get comfortable but I could still feel the sharp pains in my back. I slightly opened my eyes to peek at my clock, a little after eight. I should probably get up. Gage would only be here a few more days before he had to fly back to New York to start practice. It felt like he was constantly flying between New York and home. He had just got here four days ago would be leaving soon. Then it was up in the air when I would see him.

I could smell the coffee aroma floating up from the kitchen, calling my name. Gage always made coffee for us in the morning when he was here. Following the scent of heaven to the kitchen I grabbed a mug from the cabinet, filling it full of coffee. I leaned my hip against the counter as I brought my mug to my lips, letting my nostrils fill with the sweet smell and my mouth warm with the dark liquid. Pure heaven.

“Morning, Co.” Gage said from the bar.

Turning my head in his direction I froze in place almost spitting my coffee out. Gage was sitting on a bar stool in nothing but gray shorts. His shirt was off giving me a full view of his six pack and chiseled chest. We may live together and have created a baby together but I had never seen this much of him. He looked like some sort of Greek God sitting on his throne.

“You goin’ to swallow that coffee or see if it magically absorbs into your belly?” Gage asked amused.

Clearly the guy was used to being ogled by the ladies. Hell, I’m sure even men ogled him.

Blinking a few times I swallowed my coffee choking out, “Sweet Jesus man. Is it even natural to have abs like that? What is that you have?...Like a twelve pack? Nobody should look that good this early in the morning.”

Gage quirked an eyebrow and looked at me over his coffee mug. “Nope. I was made in a factory.” Shaking his head he smirked. “Sweetheart it’s called hard work and dedication.” Setting his mug down he bent over a little to look at his stomach. Bringing his hand up he counted out loud as he ran his index finger along his abs. “One…two…three…four…five…six. Huh, I only have a six pack. But, a twelve pack, damn even I would be impressed with that.” Keeping his head down Gage looked up at me through his lashes.

Sitting like that, that look on his face he look every bit the womanizing man whore that I know he is. Or…well was?And damn if it wasn’t hot as hell.

Pursing my lips I shut my eyes only to open them and be looking at shirtless Gage again. This time he was on the cover of GQ magazine. Jesus! He was like a nasty little gnat…his half naked body was everywhere. Taking a closer look at the cover I saw Gage standing in the middle of what looked like a stadium, he was flexing both his arms as he held them straight out, a football in his right hand. His legs were crossed at his ankles and he had that damn panty melting smile on his smug face. Like he knew that every woman that saw this magazine would use it that night and possible the following weeks as their personal female fantasy fun time. Shoving the magazine across the counter I asked, “You still going to my doctor appointment today?”

“Hey now. Be easy to paper, Co. That was dropped off for me this morning. Actually, they gave me a whole box. So, if you’re in need of some new personal time material I can hook you up.”

Scoffing I put my hands on my hips and turned to look at him. “You going with me or not?”

Gage smiled and instantly my resolve was chipping away. His eyes were sparkling with humor, something I had seen a lot. Maybe if things had been different Gage and I could have been something. Well, something besides whatever the hell we are. Co-parents? Friends?

“Wouldn’t miss it. You said they’re taking blood today, too, right?”

“Ugh! Don’t remind me,” I groaned. “I’m going to go get ready. I want to leave around ten thirty. That okay with you?”

“Yup. Won’t take me long to get ready. Already showered after my workout. Just gotta get dressed.”

That man loved getting up early and working out. Me, I was more of a sleep until noon then eat twenty seven donuts kinda girl.

Shoving off the counter, I felt a sharp pain in my back. Reaching behind me, I put pressure on my spine, wincing.

“You ok?” Gage asked, standing from his stool and taking a few steps towards me.

And he just kept getting better. Not sure why I wasn’t expecting it but when he stood his shorts feel low on his hips. He had those indent things on his lower stomach. Those pesky little things that make a girl who was going to college to be a doctor sound like she should be flipping hamburgers at McDonalds.

Squeezing my eyes shut I stammered, “I’m fine. Just back pain. I’ve been having it a lot lately but I read back pain is normal in pregnancy. Nothing to worry about. Usually if I take a hot shower it helps.”

Gage’s face relaxed and his blue eyes lost their worry as he took a step back. “Ok. Go take a shower and hopefully it will help. I’ll make some pancakes and sausage while you’re getting ready.”

Starting to walk past Gage I stopped and wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing the side of his mouth. “Thank you, Gage. I don’t know if I could do this alone.”

Hugging me tight to him he whispered, “I’m in this, Cobie. You’re not alone.”

Letting go of him I slowly made my way back to my room to shower and get ready. Today we find out if we get a boy or a girl and this was also the first ultrasound Gage was going to be at.

Stopping in front of the full length mirror in my bathroom I examined myself. My hips were slightly wider and my boobs were a little bigger. I raised my tee shirt up and rubbed my hand across my belly, looking at it in the mirror. I already had a few tiny stretch marks. My body had already changed so much in just a few short months. I wondered if a guy would ever look at my body again and think it was beautiful.

Turning on the shower I made the water as hot as I could stand it without scalding myself. Stripping my clothes I stepped into the stone covered shower letting the hot water run over me. Lifting my arms to wet my hair I felt another sharp pain in my lower back. Sucking in my breath I shifted so the water was hitting directly on my back. Feeling my tears welling in my eyes I rubbed hard circles on my back, hoping to relieve the pain.

Once my pain was manageable I reached for my shampoo and squirted it into my hands, massaging it through my hair. Finally starting to relax I let out a small little moan.

“Keep that up and I won’t stay on this side of the glass.”

Jumping in surprise I used my hands and arms attempting to cover myself.

“What the hell are you doing?” I asked Gage.

“I yelled to let you know breakfast was ready. There was no response. Just makin’ sure you weren’t dead or some shit.”

Backing into the corner I watched Gage as he watched me, looking me up and down. Biting on my lower lip I said, “As you can see I’m fine. Now, if you don’t mind I would like to finish my shower.

Instead of leaving, Gage slowly opened the shower door. What the hell was he doing?

Raising on my tippy toes attempting to push myself into the corner more I screeched, “What? Get out!”

Gage let the water hit his bare chest and back. It ran down soaking his black gym shorts. Holding his hand out to my stomach he hushed me. “Shh. Just relax. I’ve never seen your stomach. And seeing it now, knowing that’s my baby in there, it’s amazing. You look beautiful, Cobie.”

Feeling that buzz between us growing I tried to look away but that strong, hard body in front of me kept my eyes glued to him.

Rubbing his hand over my stomach he asked, “Has it moved? I mean like can you feel it move?” Gage dropped to his knees, water covering him.

“Yes. But usually it’s at night. I think the baby sleeps a lot during the day. Sometimes when I eat I can feel it moving around.”

Placing a soft kiss on my stomach he whispered something to quiet for me to hear. Slowly he started to raise back up placing a few more feather light kisses on my stomach on his way.

Close. We were too close. My body was responding to his being right in front of mine. This wasn’t ok but I was stuck.

Gage ran his nose up mine as he straightened letting his forehead rest on mine. Shutting my eyes I attempted to think of anything else but a mostly naked and wet Gage. Anything at all. I thought of homeless kitties. Homeless kitties made me think of them not having a home when it rains. Rain makes me think of water. Water makes me think of showers. Showers makes me think of a very wet Gage. And Gage wasn’t the only wet thing in this shower anymore.

“Breathe Cobie. Open your eyes. I won’t do anything, swear.” Gage whispered in my ear.

Cracking my eyes open just enough to see his face I said, “It’s not you I’m worried about.”

“Cobie, look at me.”

Biting on my lower lip I brought my eyes up to meet his.

“What are you worried about?” Gage asked.

“Me.”

“What about you?”

“I don’t want to end up being another dumb girl you can add to your bedpost. Obviously our bodies want each other but I need more than that.”

Lifting his hand he placed it on my cheek and ran his thumb across my lips. “You were never just another notch on my bedpost. Don’t ever think that. I do want you, I’m not going to lie. You look so beautiful right now. Your body changing because our baby is growing inside of you, I have never seen a more beautiful woman. Cobie, you are more than just some dumb girl. You are the mother of my child and I love you for that.”

Tilting my head in shock I asked, “You love me?”

Gage’s eyes sparkled as he smiled. “Yeah. I do.”

“Kiss me.”

Gage brought his other hand up and cupped my face. “My pleasure.”

Covering my mouth with his I felt the hot water beating down on us as he took full control of the kiss. His lips smoothly meshing with mine as his tongue explored my mouth. He was slow, gentle.

Dropping my arms from covering myself I grabbed onto his broad shoulders as a whimper left my mouth.

Gage went to pull away but I stopped him. Using my mouth to keep him close to me. “More. I want more.”

Gage didn’t say a word. He nodded.

Letting my hands slip down his wet body I pushed his gym shorts down. Commando. He was going freaking commando.

Gage used his hips to pin me against the wall and stuck one of his legs between mine, forcing me to open them. He slipped one hand between us and into the place I needed it most. He let out a deep throaty groan with his finger slipped into my wetness.

“Damn. You really want it, don’t you?” Gage asked between kisses.

“Maybe just a little,” I giggled trying to hide my embarrassment.

Lifting me a little he positioned himself and gently slid into me. It had been months since I felt this. The welcomed stretching and burning felt good.

Letting my head fall back and a moan escape my lips I begged, “Please. I need this.”

“Don’t worry sweetheart. I will give you what you need. The doctor ordered an extra large dose of PENIS-cylin and I came to deliver.”

Gage and I both laughed at his cheesy joke. Mid laugh he pulled out and slammed back into me. Shut me up. But he didn’t stop. He reached above us with one arm, placing his hand on the stone wall, using it as an anchor. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his strong jaw. With his other hand he found my swollen, throbbing clit and rubbed quick circles. Pushing me closer and closer to the edge.

“This what you needed, baby?” Gage grunted.

Running my teeth over my lower lip I barely got out, “Uh huh.” As the words left my mouth I fell over the edge. Screaming incoherently as Gage kept slamming into me.

As I was coming down from my orgasmic high I felt Gage stiffen as he released his orgasm inside of me.

His body shaking, he pushed into me one last time and let out a deep breath before slowly pulling out. He wrapped both arms around my body and rested his head on my shoulder. “That wasn’t just sex Cobie. Remember that. You’re special. We have something no one else ever will.”

Fighting my tears I said, “Ok.” That was all I could say.

Gage cracked a smile and asked, “So how about those pancakes?”

Walking into the doctor’s office I waved to Jeanie, the nurse who ran the front desk.

“Cobie, go ahead and leave a urine sample then you can go into room two, please,” Jeanie said, handing me a small specimen cup.

Grabbing the cup I turned to Gage. “Go through that door and to room two. I will be there in one minute.”

Gage scrunched his brows and asked, “Where is room two?”

Raising an eyebrow I said, “The room with the number two. There is only five rooms Gage, pretty sure you can handle it.”

“Smartass,” I heard Gage mumble as he walked passed me and down the hall.

After peeing in the little cup I sat it on the nurse’s cart and went into room two. Gage was sitting in the chair in the corner, a pamphlet in his hand.

“What’cha reading?”

Gage looked at me with humor dancing in his eyes. “Just catching up on my STD’s.”

“Eww. You can keep your STD’s to yourself.”

Gage smirked. “Baby, I think it’s a little late for that, don’t you think?”

Sticking my tongue out, I was about to say something when a nurse walked into my room.

“I’m just here to collect your blood. Nothing fun.” The cute, older nurse said, smiling.

“Yippee!” I said, rolling my eyes.

I reached for Gage’s hand as the nurse set everything up. “Please, hold my hand for this. I am terrified of needles,” I begged Gage.

Holding his hand out Gage gave me a sweet smile, something I didn’t see often. Well at least not associated with me. I got his bedroom smile or his goofy smile, hell even his pissy smile but never his sweet smile.

Pinching my eyes shut when I felt the nurse pushing the needle into my arm I sucked in a breath and squeezed Gage’s hand.

“Great job, honey. One more tube and I will be all finished with you,” My nurse said.

Feeling the nurse pulling the needle out and loosening the tourniquet I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. “That wasn’t so bad.” I let go of Gage’s hand and looked at him

Gage wiggled his fingers, opening and closing his hand as he snorted. “Maybe for you. I may need an x-ray to make sure you didn’t just break my hand.”

Shaking my head, I winked. “I think you’ll live.”

Gage mocked pained and said, “You may have just broke my multimillion dollar hand and you show no concern. What kind of person is carrying my child?” He placed his hand over his heart and fought his smile.

My nurse smiled at me as she said, “I’m all finished here. Dr. Fleming should be in, in just a few minutes.”

“Ok. Thank you.”

The room was silent as we watched my nurse walk out, closing the door behind her.

“Have you thought of any names you like yet?”

Gage lifted one shoulder and ducked his head. Gage acting shy? Say what!

“I was thinking if we have a boy we could name him Henry, after your dad.” Gage lifted his head, letting his eyes meet mine.

Feeling the lump in my throat and the burning behind my eyes, I swallowed my tears. “Henry Gage Tucker, I love that.”

“And if it’s a girl? Have you thought of a name?”

Blinking the tears from my eyes, I bit down on my bottom lip. “Londyn Hope.”

Gage looked between my eyes before asking, “How did you come up with that name?”

“I had always dreamed of going to London but now all my dreams are for our baby. And Hope for Fairhope, where she was conceived.”

“I like it. Londyn Hope Tucker.”

A knock on my door interrupted our conversation. I scooted back on the exam table and Dr. Fleming walked in.

“Good afternoon, Cobie.” Dr. Fleming shook my hand as took a seat on his stool. He reached out and shook Gage’s hand. “Hello, I am Dr. Fleming.”

Gage nodded. “Nice to meet you. I’m Gage Tucker.”

Dr. Fleming smiled before turning back to me. “So, today is just the routine checkup to make sure baby is growing as he or she should be. But, if we can get baby to cooperate we can find out the sex, if you would like.”

Nodding quickly I said, “Yes. I have been counting down to finding out if we’re having a son or daughter.”

“Then lets measure your belly then we can get to the fun stuff.” Dr. Fleming lifted my shirt and measured me, making sure I was growing like I should. “You’re measuring just like you should. The nurse was already in to take your blood, right?”

Glancing at Gage, I smirked. “Yes, she was.”

“Great. If everything comes back normal you shouldn’t hear from us but if something comes back you should get a call in two or three days. Now, let’s get you across the hall so we can find out if that’s a little boy or girl.”

Hopping off the table I felt that same shooting pain in my back. Again, I reached behind my back and put pressure, rubbing my spine.

Gage was at my side and asked, “You’re back again?”

Taking slow, deep breaths I nodded. “Mmhm.”

Dr. Fleming reached for my arm and asked, “This happen a lot?”

Gage answered for me, “It has been lately.”

Dr. Fleming pursed his lips. “You shouldn’t be having pain like that. I think you should make an appointment to see a chiropractor to make sure you don’t have a pinched nerve or your spine is out of alignment.”

“Usually when I take a hot shower the pain eases. But, I will make an appointment with a chiropractor when I leave.”

Nodding once Dr. Fleming opened the door and led us across the hall.

“I’ll let Connie know you’re ready. And I want to see you back in three weeks. Take care.”

“Thank you Dr. Fleming.” Gage shook his hand and walked into the ultrasound room.

“Thanks doctor. See you in a few weeks.” I shook his hand and turned to walk into the dimly lit room.

Sitting on the table I let my feet swing from side to side. I was getting nervous. Looking up I saw Gage staring at me. There was something in his eyes that I had never seen before. He looked happy, content.

Connie came breezing into the room, setting her machine up and having me lay back.

“Ready to find out?” Connie asked excitedly.

“Yes!”

Connie squirted the goo on my belly and I focused on the screen, waiting for my baby to pop up.

When the tiny form showed up on the screen I heard Gage’s intake of breath. Taking my eyes off the screen I looked at Gage and pulled him to me. He ran his hand down my arm to hold my hand and placed his other hand on my shoulder.

Gage looked down, both of us watching each other. Something was changing between us. Everything was changing between us.

“If you look right here, see those three lines?” Connie asked, pulling Gage and I from our trance.

Both Gage and I looked at the screen.

“You guys are looking at your daughter. You’re having a girl.”

Squeezing Gage’s hand I looked from the screen to Gage and back to the screen.

Gage kissed my temple. “We’re having a girl.” His voice was shaky, his eyes glazed over as he stared at the screen. Londyn Hope Tucker. I’m going to be a daddy. I’m going to have a daughter.” The first tears raced down his cheeks as his mouth formed the widest smile I had ever seen. “My little girl.”

Lightly running my hand over Gage’s cheek I said, “And she is a very lucky little girl. You’re going to be the best daddy to our daughter.”