Текст книги "Only You"
Автор книги: Stephanie Rose
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Текущая страница: 16 (всего у книги 17 страниц)
Three months later, everything settled into a gratifying and delightfully boring normal. Evan and I were better than ever, and living together was amazing. He spoiled me every day, and I pretended to fight him. My steroid dose steadily decreased, and it was great to make plans and not wonder if they would fall on a good day or a bad one.
The holidays snuck up on us. It was Christmas, but it sure didn’t feel like it. As I stood in my aunt’s kitchen, cutting cheese to put on her fancy silver tray—just like I did last year—I couldn’t shake the feeling of something missing inside. That something being my smart ass cousin teasing me for most of the night, the way he always did.
A lot had happened between last Christmas Eve and this one. We all tried to put on a happy face for Jack Junior’s sake. It was the first holiday that he was old enough to tear into the huge pile of presents waiting under the tree. I tried not to dwell on the fact his father wasn’t there to share it. Maybe my uncle was right: my dream was real and Jack was always here. My aunt and uncle had an eight-by-ten photo by the tree of Jack holding his baby last Christmas. I still couldn’t look at it without tearing up
“Feels weird, doesn’t it?” Aunt Marie traipsed into the kitchen wiping her hands on her apron. I nodded and gave her a sad smile. “But seeing my grandson makes me happy, and Jack would be mad if we moped around all night, wouldn’t he?” She squeezed my chin and I giggled. “I got the rest of this. Evan could use some help bringing chairs up from the basement, I think. Why don’t you go see if you can give him a hand?”
I kissed her cheek. “Sure, Aunt Marie.” I wandered out of the kitchen and down the basement steps. This was a loud Christmas, as our second cousins from Boston were in this year. It was hard to dwell on my sad thoughts when I couldn’t hear myself think over the Yankees/Red Sox suck arguments.
“Hey, handsome. I was sent down here to help you. Where are the chairs?”
Evan turned to me and gave me a sweet smile.
“I’m sure you don’t remember,” He came over to me and picked up my hand. “But this is where we first met.”
“It is?” Evan nodded and laced our fingers together.
“Jack and I were down here the summer after freshman year playing Grand Theft Auto and you sashayed down the steps in tight hot pink shorts, golden hair bouncing back and forth.” Evan pulled me closer and wrapped his arms around me.
I groaned. I remembered those shorts. I wore them everywhere just because of how much my mother said she hated them.
“I sashayed at fifteen?” I giggled.
Evan shrugged. “You introduced yourself and smiled at me, then asked if you could watch us play. I noticed how green your eyes were. I couldn’t concentrate on the rest of the game. Jack kept busting my balls because I was stopping at all the traffic lights with my stolen car. Fifteen years old and I was already ruined for anyone else.”
“I set the bar that high?” Evan pressed his lips to my forehead as he chuckled.
“Then I got to know you, and you were the sweetest thing. Not a mean bone in your body, other than when you and Jack used to fight.” Evan raised his eyebrows.
“Yeah, he was lucky enough to be the only person I could tell when and why I was pissed off at them. I miss that, and so many other things”. I looked away and Evan turned my head to meet his gaze.
“You were always so beautiful, and watching you go out with the wrong guy over and over again was torturous. At least for me.”
“And for everyone upstairs, too.” I nodded up the stairway at my loud family. Thanks to Aunt Rose forgetting her hearing aid, they were even louder.
“Then by some miracle, a year and a half ago, I finally had my chance. I was done being a chicken shit.”
“You mean when I hit on you at Starbucks?” I kissed the corner of his mouth and ran my lips down his jaw. Evan chuckled and nodded again.
“I’m not sure when it happened. Maybe it happened right here all those years ago, but I fell in love with you. You were it for me and there was no going back. Then, I almost lost you.” I took his face in my hands and kissed his cheek.
“I’m so sorry, babe. I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you like—”
Evan pressed his finger to my lips and shook his head.
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned over these past few months, I’m done wasting time.” A soft smile spread on Evan’s face as he got down on one knee in front of me. My breath caught in my throat. I can’t say I didn’t expect it, and always knew that we were heading this way, but now that it was actually happening, the air in the room got thin and my heart pounded in my ears.
“I love you. More than I ever thought I could love anyone. You’re everything to me. You’re my heartbeat, my lifeline, my Daisy. You’re all the beauty in my life. I need you. Only you. Whatever the future holds for us, all I know is I want it to be with you. I want to end every day by crawling into bed with you. I want you to have my last name.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a black velvet box. Inside was a beautiful diamond ring with a round stone set in an antique band. “This was my mother’s. I think she would approve. She was always happy when I was happy, and I’m so happy with you.” I ran my hands through his buzzed hair and down his stubbled cheek. Evan beamed at me, the way he always did. That look was what I missed the most when we were apart. He was my lifeline, too.
“Paige Alexandria Taylor, will you marry me?”
I got down on my knees and grabbed his face. Tears streamed down my cheeks as my mouth covered his.
“Hey,” Evan murmured against my lips. “Is that a yes?” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him harder. His hand tangled in my hair as he pulled me on top of him. I straddled his lap as our lips kept moving. I lifted my hips and then sank back down on him, drawing a growl from his throat as he grabbed my ass with both hands.
“Did she say yes? I can’t hear them . . .”
Evan took his lips from mine and laughed. “No, Aunt Rose. Not yet,” he yelled up the staircase with his hands still on my ass. I giggled as he turned back to face me, his brow furrowed, waiting for my real answer.
“Yes. Yes, yes, yes!” I screamed loud enough for the entire house to hear me. Loud cheers and clapping came from upstairs, followed by swift footsteps. Evan slipped the ring on my finger and kissed the top of my hand.
My mother was the first downstairs, smiling but shaking her head as we stood up. “We all got so nervous when it got quiet. We thought you said no. Congratulations baby girl!” She pulled me into a hug and then winked at Evan before she kissed his cheek.
“That’s not why I thought they got quiet.” Ellie smirked at me before she rushed over and tackled us.
“So you all knew?” I looked around at my beaming family. “You’re a bunch of sneaks. How long did you know?”
My uncle kissed my cheek and stood beside my mother.
“Evan asked us while you were still in the hospital if he could marry you. We only knew about his plan to ask you tonight a couple of weeks ago.”
“When I was in the hospital?” I glanced over at Evan and narrowed my eyes. “When?”
“The first night you were in ICU. I knew two things—you were going to get better and I was going to marry you.” He shrugged. “I was right on both counts.” My vision got cloudy with tears. This man never gave up on me, even when I gave him every reason to. He picked up my hand and kissed the back of my wrist.
“I love you. Thank you for not giving up on me.” Evan smiled and took my face in his hands.
“You’re mine. How could I ever give up?” He kissed my lips as his thumbs caressed my cheeks.
“I don’t know about you guys, but I think it’s time we break into the good champagne.” Aunt Marie rushed down the stairs with glasses and a bottle in her arms.
“So when do you think you’ll get married?” Aunt Rose rushed over and squeezed our arms.
“As soon as possible.” Evan answered for us and looked at me. “I think we’re past the point of long engagements, no?”
“I agree.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and kissed his lips. “City Hall it is.”
“Over my dead body, City Hall!” Mom huffed at me. “You need to have a wedding.”
“No, I need to have a marriage.”
Mom pursed her lips at me.
“We can have something very small.” Evan interrupted the beginning of our argument. “We have a customer who has a restaurant with a back room. I’ll check it out after the holidays. I just don’t want to wait more than a few weeks.” Evan wrapped me in his arms. “I’ve waited long enough.”
Uncle John handed each of us a flute filled with champagne. Ellie held one glass in each hand.
I smirked at her. “Double fisting for the holidays?”
She shook her head. “Holding Jack’s glass. He told me when you guys got married, he didn’t want to miss a thing.”
“To Evan and Paige.” Uncle John raised his glass. “To happiness, to health, and to a long life together.”
I glanced at Ellie as she wiped away a tear and set Jack’s glass down before she took a drink. Life had no guarantees, and we all didn’t get the privilege of growing old with the one we loved. My life certainly didn’t turn out the way that I thought, but I still felt lucky. I found the one, and I got to keep him.
Anything else that happened, like my cousin said, was just gravy.
Four years later
Sneaking up on her was always too easy. I watched that cute blonde brow furrow over those big green eyes as she focused her heart out on something, completely oblivious to my approach.
“Gotcha!” I lifted her up by the waist and buried my face in her neck as I tickled her side.
“Stop it, Daddy!” Lucy tried to squirm out of my arms. I set her back down on her seat in the bleachers and kissed her cheek. “You like my picture?” If you gave my daughter crayons and paper, she was happily occupied for hours.
“I do. Maybe when you grow up, you can make pictures on the computer like Mommy.” I sat next to her and pulled her on my lap. She was my kid and all, but I thought she had exceptional drawing skills for a three-year-old. She was smart and beautiful, just like her mother.
“Hey, I think you’re needed on the field, babe.” I groaned at my wife as I raked my hands down my face.
“This would be a lot more fun if Jack didn’t hate it out there so much. He spends more time kicking dirt and picking flowers than caring where the ball is.” I lifted Lucy off my lap and stood.
This was Jack Junior’s first year in T-ball, and I was fairly certain his rookie year was also his retirement. Every game, I stood on the field with the other fathers, and every game, I heard a plethora of excuses from my godson as to why he needed to stay in the dugout. Ellie wanted to take him out, but I convinced her to let him finish the season. I held out hope that he’d maybe start to like it, especially when I remembered Jack talk about little league. Today was his last game, and I was ashamed at the relief I felt.
“C’mon.” Paige kissed my cheek. “One more game, and he can pick up his little trophy and you are done.”
“Okay, okay.” I turned my head to kiss Paige’s lips and made my way onto the field. I glanced over to third base and saw Jack kicking up a dirt storm with his cleats. Instead of a ball player, he looked like Pigpen from the Peanuts gang.
I shook my head and kept walking.
“Evan?”
“Yeah, Daisy.” I stopped as she came closer to whisper in my ear.
“You look hot on that field. Like, really hot. That tight T-shirt sticking to all the right places, legs full of muscle. After the game, you just might score yourself.” She bit my shoulder as she wiggled her eyebrows.
I let out a long sigh and shook my head before I kissed her forehead and jogged away.
“What?” she called behind me.
“I know what you’re doing. Playing dirty. Not very nice, Daisy.” She cocked an eyebrow at me as she took a seat next to Lucy.
Paige wanted another baby. We were shocked when shortly after we got married, we found out Paige was pregnant. Although Dr. Stephens wasn’t too concerned, I was terrified her entire pregnancy. We had a good high risk doctor and for the most part, Paige had an uneventful, textbook pregnancy. I almost started to relax until Paige’s water broke at thirty-eight weeks and she needed an emergency C-section. Dr. Stephens warned about the stress of pregnancy causing a lupus flare, and I was scared to death that would do it. Both my girls ended up fine, but I didn’t want to risk Paige’s health. I’m sure most guys wouldn’t think their hot wife trying to seduce them twenty-four/seven was a hardship, but Paige was the center of everything. The lupus had been under control for a number of years, but it was still there. If there was even the slightest risk of her getting sick again, I wanted no part of it. My Daisy was too important.
Not that I didn’t love being a dad. Lucy Jacqueline Jacobs was the light of both our lives. She was a little pip squeak with a huge personality, and always getting into trouble. In about ten years or so, I would have my hands full.
“Mommy, I picked a flower for you!” Jack ran over to Ellie behind the fence, walking right over a ground ball. It was frustrating as hell, but I couldn’t help but smile at the joy in Ellie’s face. I’m sure his dad would overlook his lack of interest in baseball if he kept his mom beaming like that.
Finally, the last little boy rounded the bases and the season was over. I gave Jack a piggy back ride over to where the family was sitting. For a little boy who hated to play, he had quite the entourage at every game.
“Hey, big guy. That’s a great trophy.” John was genuinely excited. Jack shrugged it off and was happy to be resting from his slow stroll from third base to home plate. “Next year you have to try out to get on the team. Think you’ll play next year?”
Tess huffed. “Maybe if he brings a deck of cards.”
Paige scowled at Tess while I laughed. “Mom! Don’t say that.” Lucy rested on Paige’s hip as she looked between her mother and her grandmother, bickering as usual.
“Oh Paige, please. John, this isn’t his thing. Maybe he can try soccer. Or cub scouts. They sit a lot. He’ll like that.”
I set Jack on the ground and kneeled in front of him. “You made it to the end, dude. I’m proud of you.” His little face lit up.
“Thanks, Uncle Evan. I don’t have to come back do I? It’s torture.” I chuckled at his honesty.
“No, all over.”
“Thank God. Can Lucy and I get a pretzel?” Whenever he asked for something, he always asked if Lucy could get it, too. He looked out for his little cousin, and I loved to watch history repeat itself.
“Sure, buddy.”
Jack took Lucy by the hand to the concession stand as we followed behind them.
“Thank you for doing this for him,” Ellie whispered to me. “It meant a lot to Jack.”
“Part of the godfather obligations. I was very happy to do it.”
“I have quite the collection of dandelions this season, so it wasn’t for nothing.”
“No.” I squeezed her hand. “It sure wasn’t.” She squeezed my hand back and jogged ahead to catch up with the kids.
I put my arm around Paige’s shoulders as she snuggled into my side.
“I’ll break you eventually,” she whispered in my ear as she bit my earlobe.
“Daisy,” I huffed at her. “I’m sorry. I’m scared. I don’t want to lose you, and things got a little too interesting when we had Lucy.”
“What happened with Lucy happens in a lot of pregnancies, even the ones with moms who don’t have lupus. What happened to wanting a ton of kids?”
“I want my wife. We have Lucy.”
Paige shrugged. “She’s an only child, like we all were. I’d love to give her a brother or sister.” Jack took the pretzel Ellie handed him and gave it all to Lucy without a second thought. I nodded at them.
“I think she has a good brother in place already.” I took a deep breath. “I can’t say no to you, and you know that, which makes what you’re doing mean.”
Paige cupped my cheek. “I’ll be fine. Dr. Stephens isn’t worried. We can’t be afraid to live our lives, babe.”
I glared at my wife. She would always win.
“All right. I’ll go see Dr. Stephens with you to talk about it, but if there is even the slightest risk or problem . . .”
“I know, babe. I’ll drop it and it will be just the three of us. And I’ll be okay with that.” She flung her arms around my neck and pressed her lips against mine. “And if we have a boy, he doesn’t have to play T-ball unless he really wants to.”
“Thank you. Oh, I almost forgot.” I dug into my duffel bag. “Look what we found in left field.” I tucked a daisy behind her ear.
“Thank you.” Paige wrapped her arms around my waist. “I love you, babe.”
I kissed the top of her head and pulled her closer. “I love you too, Daisy.”
I supposed my wife was right. It was silly to dwell on the what ifs and what could go wrong. That wasn’t living. A wise old friend used to say live for today, because that’s all you really have.
I gazed at my wife next to me and my daughter giggling up ahead.
Today, I had everything.
The End
Lupus is a serious illness that can take years to accurately diagnose.
For more information, please visit The Lupus Foundation at www.lupus.org
Bringing Evan and Paige to you was both my greatest joy and single most challenging experience of my life. Paige’s plight brought up a lot of old fears—some of which are still quite current in our lives. The emotion and mortality in this story was quite real to me, because much of it came from real life events. The fictional ride I took you all on had a lot of truth in it.
The first person I have to thank is my husband, James. He relived some of the darkest moments of our lives to make sure I portrayed everything accurately—including the terrible things he went through alone. Thank you for always believing in me, and helping me tell the best story that I could. I’ve loved you for most of my life, thank you for being my first fan. And, I will admit this in print for all the world to see, you are one hell of a beta reader.
To my mother, the real-life Tess. You did the toughest job in the world alone and never look like you broke a sweat. Being a mother now, I realize how everything I went through, you did, too. Thank you for always fighting for me, even now.
To my son, John. You were the miracle and gift I always wanted, even though I almost gave up hope. I love you more than all the stars in the sky, my Lego-obsessed superhero.
To my editor, Brenda Letendre. My great teacher, therapist, and friend. Thank you for loving my characters as much as I do, and helping me make them the best they could be. I’ve learned so much from you, even from the random texts that start, “Hey, beautiful editor, question for you . . .” Your patience for me knows no bounds and I am blessed to have found you.
To my betas:
Roxie, you are definitely the Beta Fairy. You have an unbelievable eye, and I am so thankful for your amazing talent to see the things that no one else does. More than being a fantastic beta, you are a wonderful friend. You keep my head on straight and give me more spit takes than anyone I’ve ever known. I’m blessed to have you in my life.
Christine Mateo, you’re an amazing and supportive friend. You encourage me every day, and always have an ear to listen—even when I complain about the same things over and over again. Thank you for always having my back, and caring enough to read my words. When you yelled at me, I knew I was on track . . . hehe.
Jena Campbell, I’m at a loss how to thank you. You dug deep into Only You, showing me all the ways to make it better and at the same time telling me how much you loved it. Thank you for the guidance, the teasers and for being such an amazing person. Sorry I made you cry in the closet.
Shannon Daniels, I thank Lucas for bringing you into my life. Thank you for helping me make Evan a sweet but tough alpha and for being such an amazing friend and supporter by both beta and proofreading.
Laura Murphy, my sister from another mister. I could write three paragraphs of thank yous. Not only are you a kick ass beta with an eagle eye, you are my sounding board and, quite often, reside on the receiving end of all of my freak outs. Thank you for making Only You accurate and perfect as it could be. You are going to blow all of us out of the water when you hit publish.
Tina Lynne, you are a wonderful friend and, whether you like it or not, now a lifelong beta. Thank you for making the story that meant so much to me shine and for your amazing support from before day one.
Tabitha Wilbanks and Paula Genereau, thank you for taking the time to do a full read through, and making my blood pressure go down with your enthusiasm of how much you loved the story. Tab, you are always there for me and a huge cheerleader. That means more than you’ll ever know.
J.A. DeRouen, you are probably one of the best people that I ever met, and who I hope to become when I grow up, both as a person and as a writer. Thank you for taking so much time to help me tighten up Only You, and for being such a great friend to me every single day. I don’t know what I would do without your support. I love you forever, Cajun Queen.
Gia Riley, you’ve been by my side from the start, and that means a lot. Although you fell hard for the character that didn’t make it, thank you for giving me the push to finish something that meant a lot to me. Our friendship and daily chats calm my nerves.
BL Berry, I seriously don’t know where to begin. When you reached out to me a year ago after I made my author page, I didn’t know what an amazing friend I had found. You support me, cheer me on, and promote me to the masses, and for Only You, gave me the excitement and motivation I needed when I wanted to burn the damn thing. Knowing you loved Evan and Paige is what made me keep going when it got too personal and painful.
To my friends:
Faith Andrews, my friend and mentor always. Thank you for always sticking by me, and always getting me. I still hope to be half the writer that you are someday.
Kristy Love, we may have bonded over misery, but you keep me laughing all day long. Thank you for your passionate broken sentences, and for always being able to make me see what’s important and what’s not. You’re a true sister. #MS4Lyfe
Kimberly Rose, Mia Kayla, and Autumn Grey, three talented women who are always there to lend me a listening ear or offer their support. Amazing how you can feel so close to people that you’ve never met face to face.
Ann Marie, Daina, Millie, and Candie, I may not see you as much as I’d like, but always feel you there. Thank you for loving and supporting me all these years. True friends are hard to find, but I hit the jackpot.
Natalie, thank you for being the real life inspiration for the perfect bestie. Phrases like ‘stuck on stupid’ were meant to be in a book. Thanks for always being my kick in the ass and giving it to me straight, even when I didn’t want to hear it.
To #indiechicksrock, an awesome group of women with tremendous talent and heart. I’m so thankful to be a part of this group and excited for what is in store for us.
To the Rose Garden, I love each and every one of you and am so grateful for your support. This group is my absolute favorite online place to me with the book talks, the eye candy, the excitement over what I have cooking. It’s my happy place, and I love that it’s expanding.
To Ella Stewart, who took an interest in me way before I pressed publish. Thank you for your constant support. You are a true light in this book world and I can’t thank you enough for sticking by me.
To Lara Ross Petterson of Cool Hookers Book Club, Kelly and Tanya of Sugar Shack Book Blog, and all the bloggers and readers who took a chance on me in the first place, both with Always You and Only You. To write characters that are loved by even one person is an immeasurable high. For every review posted, recommendation passed along, and message that the words I wrote moved someone, grateful doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel.
Thank you for reading Evan and Paige’s story. I’m working on giving Ellie the happiness she deserves in 2016. I take pride in writing everyday type characters. We all deserve that second chance, no matter who we are, and I hope my stories give you that glimmer of hope.
