Текст книги "Ever Enough"

Автор книги: Stacy Borel

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Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

It had been two weeks since my Tiny Girl said yes to moving in with me. I actually didn’t think she’d agree to this arrangement. I figured I’d have to argue with her and drag her kicking and screaming the whole way. I might have even anticipated tying her to a kitchen chair in my new house until she got used to the idea of living here. Not the best plan admittedly, but I was desperate. Thankfully she took minimal persuasion and now she was in the master bedroom across the hall. We fought more about what room she’d stay in than the actual moving in part. That first night here had been interesting…

“You want me to come right now?” She’d followed me out of her bedroom.

“Yes Tiny Girl, you’re coming with me tonight. That’s why we rushed with papers. I don’t see any reason for this to take any longer.” I was digging around in a hallway closet for a suitcase.

“But didn’t you just see the house today? Doesn’t it take like thirty days or something?” I stopped what I was doing and looked at her. She was so cute standing there with her hands on her hips.

“That’s what money can buy you. For the right price and cash incentives, the seller was more than happy to close today.”

“Cash incentives?”

“Yes, cash incentives. I offered well over the asking price if the seller would go through the trouble of closing the deal today.”

She looked confused. “How much money do you have Finn? That seems like an awful lot more than a songwriter should have.”

I smirked at her. “Now Em, that’s awfully nosey don’t you think?”

“Cocky bastard.” She said under her breath.

“Hmmm… what’s that?” I raised my eyebrow.

“Nothing.” She crossed her arms and it pushed her breasts up and showed even more cleavage than before. I swallowed audibly. I was going to need a cold shower tonight and a pep talk with ‘Little Finn’.

Handing her the suitcase I’d dug out, I told her to pack whatever she thought she’d need for tonight and tomorrow, and we’d come back later for the rest of her stuff. She walked away from me grumbling about me being a bossy asshole. I chuckled. It must be the pregnancy hormones.

We drove to the other side of town and into a new subdivision. Besides the music playing on the radio, the car ride was pretty quiet. When I pulled up to the house, I parked and we sat for a moment while I let her take it all in. The house was a brand new ranch style home with a manicured lawn and landscaping around the front of the house. I’d wanted to look at the two-story places down the street, but Harper reamed me for being thoughtless. She said that it would be hard on Em and unsafe for her to be walking up and down stairs with a baby. She was right, so I put the two-story homes out of my mind and decided on this home.

“This is it, huh?” She was looking around at the front of the house.

“Yep.” I got out of the car and walked around to her side.

I reached for her hand and she willingly let me take it. We walked to the front door and before I opened it, I handed her a key and said “Welcome home.” I smiled down at her and she gave me a shy smile in return.

Walking inside I gave her a few minutes to wander around and take in her surroundings. She went from room to room taking inventory. When she walked back to me she said, “It’s very nice Finn.”

“Good, I’m glad you like it. We’ll have to go to the furniture store on your next day off and get this place furnished. Start thinking about how you want to decorate.”

“Me? It’s your house Finn. You decorate it however you’d like.”

“Em, this isn’t just my house. This is your house too. We both live here now, and I want you to be as comfortable as possible.”

“Do you know how long you are going to stick around before you head back to California?”

“At least until you’re settled, but we can worry about my schedule later.”

“You’re not going to make this easy, are you?” Her lips twitched, trying not to grin.

“Not when it comes to this, even if I have to remind you every day. We both live here, so get used to it. Besides, don’t you think this looks like the kind of house that needs a woman’s touch?” I stretched my arms out and glanced around.

“I suppose you’re right.” She put her hand over her mouth and stifled a yawn.

“You look tired. Why don’t you go ahead and sleep, we can talk about decorating in the morning.”

She nodded her head and turned to walk away but paused. “Wait. Which room should I take?”

My brows furrowed. “What do you mean which room? You’re taking the master.”

“Finn, I’m not taking the master. It’s too big for me, and you bought this house so it’s only right that you have the biggest room.”

She was so stubborn. “Em, I planned on you taking the master, and when the baby comes, there will be plenty of room for a cradle and whatever else a baby needs. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

“I’m still saving for a baby set, so I don’t need that much space right now. Really… the master is yours.” There go the hands on those narrow hips again.

I growled out a sigh. “Emilyn, I swear I will carry you down to that room and lock you in there. This isn’t up for discussion. I had a king sized bed delivered and set up in there just for you, in case you didn’t notice.”

Her eyes grew a bit wide. “What would you have said if I’d told you no?”

“No wasn’t an option and we’ll leave it at that.” I stared her down, daring her to say more.

We locked eyes for a long time before she finally relaxed her pose. Without a word, she turned on her heels and made her way down the hall. She called over her shoulder, “My bag is still in the car. Put it outside my door would you?”

I shook my head and chuckled. I liked her being demanding, and I knew that I’d gladly give her whatever she wanted…

It took some adjusting—on both our parts—to get used to being near each other again, but I felt like we were finally getting into a routine. We made small talk and asked questions. I made it known from the start that I wanted to be involved in her OB appointments and anything to do with the divorce. I realized that I was pushing for a lot, especially since we’d only just reconnected, but I couldn’t help it. I needed for her to know that she wasn’t alone anymore. She was still pretty tight-lipped about the talk we’d had the night I asked her to move in with me. I assumed she had questions to ask me about the night I left, but she hadn’t said anything yet. Her eyes had been so lost and hurt when I told her. I decided that I’d let her come to me when she was ready. It couldn’t have been easy being in her shoes. I dropped a bomb on her. I knew she had been hurt badly, and now because of my mistake, she was in this mess. I’m surprised she didn’t hate me. But she kept moving forward, refusing to look back. It was admirable, but I worried that everything was building somewhere inside; like a ticking time bomb. I knew there was a chance that someday she would explode and I would be the one to take the brunt of it. I’ll gladly take it too.

Being here with her has been more than I could have ever asked for. There had been more than several times when the physical tension between Em and I had sparked while we were still adjusting to our new routines. A few days ago Em and I went to the paint store to pick out wall colors for the nursery…

She couldn’t decide on a color so we brought home three different ones. It was good that we’d just taken samples because when she got home, she decided one looked like baby puke, and so that was ruled out. I’d gone to get some plastic from the garage to put down on the carpet before we started painting, but when I walked back in the room, Em had already painted two shades of yellow on the wall and was standing in front of them pondering.

“What’s the matter?” I said, squatting beside her as I lay out the plastic.

“Should we use ‘Lemon Twist’, or ‘Pineapple Cream’?” Her eyes were darting back and forth between the two shades.

“Are we talking about paint colors or dessert?”

She slapped my shoulder. “Finn, I’m being serious. That’s what they’re called.” She looked from my face back at the wall. “This one is a bit brighter and fun, while this one is pretty and calming.”

I chuckled. “Em it’s paint, not rocket science. They’re both yellow, and I’m sure the baby won’t care what color the walls are.”

I could see her rolling her eyes, which made me laugh a bit harder. “They’re not just paint colors. There’s a science behind it. Brighter colors attract a baby’s attention; it’s something they like to stare at. But softer colors are soothing.”

I stood close to her and heard her let out a small gasp. Lowering my eyes to hers, I put my hands on her shoulders. “How about you close your eyes and I spin you around and you point to one?” I was teasing, but my voice had grown huskier. She smelled like sweet fruit, and the paint that she’d already managed to get on her hands.

Her eyes glanced over to one of my hands, and she swallowed. “Not funny. Help me choose, please?” She said softly.

I watched her beautiful sweet face, obviously not just conflicted about paint colors.

“Okay Tiny Girl.” I sighed and turned her to stand in front of me. Her small frame pressed into the length of my body. There was no way she couldn’t feel I was aroused. “That one.” I pointed to, what I assumed was, Pineapple Cream. I moved my mouth down to her ear, “Soft and soothing seems to be the way to go.”

She shivered. “Finn…”

I knew she wanted me but the way she said my name… it was like she was pleading with me to stop whatever it was we were doing. I cleared my throat, “I’m going to go change into something I can get paint on.”

She nodded and I walked out of the room…

I was in one of the spare bedrooms that I’d set up for my music, and Kyler was strumming his guitar and pausing every few second to write down the notes. I was working on a new song when I heard the front door open and close. I got up and stretched when I saw Em standing at the door watching me. My shirt had ridden up and part of my stomach was showing. Her eyes were zeroed in on the exposed patch of skin and I gave her a sly grin when I dropped my arms and her eyes traveled back up to my face. She glared at me because I’d caught her.

“What’s up preggo?” Ky stopped playing his guitar and sat back on the black futon I’d bought for the room. Ky and I painted the walls red and black last week and set up pretty much everything we’d needed to use the room as a new studio.

She shifted her eyes from mine to look at him. “Not much, just got back from work. I’m about to change and go cook dinner. Are you sticking around?”

“Nah! I’ve got to go check in with my Dad and I thought maybe Harper could use a surprise visit.” His devilish grin made me laugh.

“Careful there buddy. Who knows what that woman will do when she’s surprised.” I poked at Ky.

“That’s the fun of it my man!” He started gathering his things.

Em was still standing in the doorway Ky beside her. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. If it had been anybody else I’d have broken his nose, but I knew he had a thing for Harper. “Tell your old man hey from me. Let him know I’ll stop by this week for a visit.”

“Will do!” He said and he left the house.

I stared at Em from across the room while she shifted from side to side. I was certain my watching her was making her uncomfortable but it couldn’t be helped; I loved looking at her. She was even more beautiful pregnant than I could have imagined. She literally glowed. Who would have thought I’d believe that load of shit about women glowing while pregnant?

“So ummm… I’m going to go make dinner. You want anything in particular?”

“I’m fine with whatever you want to make. Do I have time to go for a run?”

“Yeah, it’ll be about an hour.”

I nodded and she turned and walked away. Why on earth did she look so nervous? I’d had to calm my growing erection when I caught her looking at me. Was that why she looked like she was ready to run away? I was hers if she wanted me. All she had to do was make the first move.

I went to my room and changed into some jogging pants and a t-shirt. I thought about telling her bye, but I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable. I’d felt some growing sexual tension in the house, but I was sure it had to all be in my head. Saying that, I’d taken more than a few cold showers since living with her. It was all I could do; besides hiding in my writing studio and scribbling out some nonsensical words about a horny guy pining after a pregnant girl. Incidentally, I really should burn those in case Em found them. She’d think I was some pervert. I scrubbed my hands down my face and took off out the front door sprinting. Exercise was good. This another one of the few outlets I had to tire myself out. Oh who was I fucking kidding. I was a ball of sexual energy, and my Tiny Girl was the only one that could take care of it.

I ran four miles in record time, before returning to the house a sweaty mess. When I walked in the door I smelled seafood and something else wafting through the air. Taking off my shoes, I paused and listened when I thought I heard singing coming from the kitchen. I was going to go straight to the shower to clean up, but I needed to investigate the sound. When I rounded the corner I stopped dead in my tracks. Em was blasting her iPod on the surround sound and swaying her hips to the beat of the music. She was singing loudly with her back turned to me. What shocked me more than the beautiful sight before me was the music she was playing; it was mine. She was playing a Down Glory Road song that I’d written two years ago. I’d intended for it to be a slow love ballad, but the record company insisted it would sound better as an upbeat song and they’d been right. Em said she knew my work, but hearing her sing my lyrics and move her small body around the kitchen was the ultimate turn on. Fuck the four miles I’d just sweat through, I was energized and hard as a rock.

My fantasy was interrupted when Em turned around, saw me standing there watching her and screamed. “Jesus Finn! You scared the shit out of me!”

I had to stand on the other side of the island so she wouldn’t see my blatant erection. “Sorry Tiny Girl. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

She turned the music down. Her cheeks were blazing and it was the most adorable sight to see. “You weren’t kidding. You do know some of my songs.”

“Yeah, but this one is my favorite.” I smiled. What she didn’t know was that I’d written this song with her in mind. It was about making the biggest mistake of your life, and then doing everything you could to try and make things right.

Changing the subject I asked, “It smells amazing in here. Do I have time to shower before it’s ready?”

“Yeah you’ve got a few minutes.” She turned to stir some rice.

“You know you don’t have to cook for me Em. I can cook you know?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t mind. I love to cook and it makes me feel productive.”

I nodded, before realizing she couldn’t see me. “Well I really appreciate it. You’re going to need to slow down though. I don’t want you to overexert yourself.”

She turned to the side and said, “I’m fine, promise.”

I bobbed my head a bit and turned to get a change of clothes… and take advantage of another cold shower.

Talk about a girl moment. I didn’t mean to scream when I saw Finn standing behind me, but he’d been so quiet I hadn’t heard him come in. How embarrassing! He’d caught me dancing around and singing like a banshee. I just wanted to hide under my bed except, I couldn’t fit under my bed anymore. That thought made me want to cry. Stupid pregnancy hormones!

While I set the table for dinner, I heard the bathroom door open. I tip toed over to peak down the hall. I caught a glimpse of Finn in just a towel, with his back glistening with water droplets before he walked into his room and shut the door. What a really nice back, I giggled to myself. Harper and I always would laugh while we watched TV shows on The CW and the cute guys would have their shirts off. We’d say things like, “That’s a really great back” or “Oh I’d touch that arm.” But the back I just watched walk away, was something more than ‘nice’. Finn was broad and muscled, with tattoos on his shoulder blades and a partial sleeve going down his left arm. I wanted to lick those tattoos… after I licked all the water off his body.

Finn’s voice snapped me out of my highly inappropriate daydream. “Em? You okay there? You’re kind of staring off in space.” The man I’d been fantasizing about was now standing in front of me with his hands on my upper arms, neck slightly bent to look me in the eyes. Why did he have to smell so damn edible?

I cleared my throat and said, “Oh, yeah, I’m fine. Just thinking, that’s all.” Holy mess, I needed to get rid of this sexual tension. I need to get out my pregnancy book and see if the added hormones are fucking with my libido too.

“Anything you care to share?”

“Ummm…no! Let’s just have dinner. I was about to go grab the salmon.” I practically ran from the room. When I came back, he was already seated and was looking at his phone. He seemed perturbed. He was so focused on whatever he was looking at that he hadn’t even noticed that I’d come back into the room. When I pulled the chair out and it scraped across the floor, he jumped and set his phone—face down—on the table.

“Now who’s the one that seems distracted?” I smiled at him.

“Oh, I’m not distracted. Just some stuff going on back in California that needs my attention.” He winked at me and dug in. “So have you heard from your lawyer this week?”

I was still uncomfortable talking to Finn about my divorce, but he was genuinely interested and he wanted to support me. “Yes actually, I have. It’s funny you asked about it because I just got the final papers. They don’t mention the baby at all. Just that West has added more to my monthly alimony. I have no idea why he feels the need to give me so much though. I never asked him for anything, well besides helping me take care of my medical expenses.”

“You’re kidding right? Didn’t you say he told you he used you throughout your marriage?” Finn sounded aggravated.

“Well… yes, but that doesn’t mean that I need all of that money.”

“It also doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve the money Em. That fucking prick cheated on you and you walked in on it. Nobody deserves that.”

I sighed and my shoulders slumped. Raising my eyes to Finn’s, I addressed the one issue he had yet to acknowledge. "I think you’ve forgotten that I cheated as well Finn." He closed his mouth. "You and I kissed at that reunion, while I was still married. So I'm just as guilty of cheating as he is."

His mouth set in a firm line and his jaw visibly tightened. "That's not the same thing as fucking the interior decorator and you know it." His tone sent a shiver down my spine. "You're right. It isn't the same thing, and I'm sorry." Needing to make my meaning clear I explained.

“I’m not saying that I deserved it Finn. What I’m saying is it’s too much. I’ve already told you I don’t want the money, and all of this feels like he’s trying to pay me off… like I was some sort of rent-a-wife for the past eight years and now I’m being returned.”

“Emilyn, listen to me carefully. You weren’t borrowed. You had a husband that unjustifiably used you. Now he’s paying for it. Okay so it’s with his money, but you deserve it. Use it to give your baby everything he or she needs. Okay?” He’d stopped eating while he spoke, but I had picked up my fork and dutifully ate my salmon for something to do.

“I guess I see what you are saying. I’ll think about it. But knowing that the money is coming from him, and how I got it, makes me feel dirty.” I shivered.

“There are plenty of things that could make you feel dirty Em, but money isn’t one of them.” I paused with my fork in the air, my mouth wide open.

“Finley Morgan!” He chuckled at me.

“Alright! Alright! So did the papers say when everything is going to be finalized?”

“As early as next week. It’s one of the perks of West being a lawyer. He knows the judges and probably managed to get this thing pushed through.” I grumbled my last statement. “I’m sure Julia is pressuring him to be done with me as soon as possible too.”

“I don’t see how anybody could want someone else over you.”

I let out a small bitter laugh. “You don’t have to say that, but I appreciate the sentiment.”

“You think I’m lying?”

“I think you’re trying to make a pregnant woman feel better about herself.” I reached over and patted his forearm. He tracked my movement with his eyes.

“I’m not feeding you lines Tiny Girl. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, baby and all! I’ll tell you that every day for the rest of my life if I have to.”

“I know you would, and that’s very sweet of you.” I sat back in my chair and looked at the table. We’d finished eating but I was feeling exhausted. “Do you mind cleaning up? I’m going to go take a long bath in that huge tub I haven’t tested yet.”

“Of course I don’t mind. Go relax and spend some time off your feet. You need to start resting more.” The concern in his voice made me melt.

I got up from the table and went and started running the water. When the tub was full, I sank into the hot water and enjoyed the steam rising around me. Lying there, I let my mind drift back to seeing Finn with just his towel on. He was a couple of inches taller than he was in high school. Naturally I wondered if other things had grown too. I didn’t have a whole lot of experience when it came to the naked male form. I’d seen a few in my life besides Finn and West, but could I really count the ones I’d seen on television? Either way, Finn wasn’t small. I remembered just how full I felt when he was inside me. I loved the feel of him moving in and out, hitting all those spots that made me quiver. He’d kiss my neck and move those talented fingers down to my clit and send me over the edge. West had never got me off like Finn used to.

I sat up feeling overheated and extremely aroused. This was getting ridiculous! I needed some relief and I needed it now! Harper had bought me a small vibrator when I moved into her house and said, “Here, take care of yourself. We’re all bitchy when we aren’t getting some,” before walking away. I’d laughed at the time, but now I was privately thanking her for being so intuitive.

Getting out of the tub and wrapping a towel around my body, I walked into the bedroom. Though it was cooler in here, my skin was still hot. I found the vibrator in the back of the bedside table and pulled it out, setting it on the bed. As I glanced at the door to make sure it was closed, I made a mental note to have a lock put on it. I couldn’t have anybody walking in on me while I was changing. Oh who was I kidding? I couldn’t have anybody catching me getting off either! Lying back on my bed I removed my towel and pulled the covers over the top of me.

My hand slid down my bare stomach and I lightly spread myself open. I was so freaking turned on that my fingers were already wet. Turning on my vibrator, I placed it on my clit and my hips tilted up of their own accord. I circled it around, letting it touch all of the small sensitive spots that made my body quake. I turned my face into the pillow and stifled a low moan. I was just about to slip it inside myself when a knock sounded at the door. I physically froze, and although I called out a response almost instantly, my voice was hoarse with arousal. “Hold on, I’ll be out in a second.” My heart jumped into my throat and I immediately sat up. I tried to quickly switch the vibrator off but my hands were shaking so badly that I didn’t have time. Finn opened the door and was standing with his hair in disarray and a wild look in his eyes. I hid my hands behind my back tightly gripping the vibrating object, hoping like hell that he couldn’t hear it. Unfortunately for me, my eighty year old grandpa would have been able to hear it now that it wasn’t being muffled by the covers.

“Wha… what are you doing in here Finn?” Pausing to take stock, I was pleased to find that my covers were tucked under my arms, preventing my breasts from being exposed. Unfortunately my shaking voice couldn’t be helped. I was so close to release I couldn’t tell if I was shaking from my impending orgasm, or from nervousness at Finn nearly catching me in the act.

“What’s behind your back Tiny Girl?” His voice was deep and gruff and he was breathing hard.

“Oh it’s nothing, just my phone on vibrate. Harper keeps calling me.”

He moved towards me. “So why don’t you answer it?”

Shit! I was still fumbling with the toy all while trying not to drop the covers. “I will after you leave.”

“Hmmm… I see.” He was very nearly in touching distance. “Well, why don’t you hand it over here while you go get some clothes on and I’ll talk to Harper until you’re done.”

“Why are you being so nosey? If you’d just leave I could get dressed and call her back.” I was certain he could see my pulse racing.

He held out his hand. “Give it to me Tiny Girl.” His eyes were vibrant blue and fierce.

“Give you what, my phone? If you would just get out I could call….” He interrupted me.

“Emilyn, I know you have a vibrator behind your back, now give it to me.”

I didn’t know what was worse. The fact that he knew what I had been doing, or the fact that he was asking me to hand over the offending object. I had two choices here. I could either play dumb to keep up the charade, or I could hand it over and feel ridiculed. I was going with playing dumb. “What the fuck are you talking about Finn? I don’t have a vibrator. Now would you give me some privacy please?”

This time he stepped right up to me, molding his body to mine. Oh my god, he was turned on! I had to tilt my head all the way back to look in his face. He intently watched me as his left hand lightly brushed my shoulder and slowly grazed down my arm. He knew what he was doing to me. His hand continued down its path and I was so lost to the sensation of his touch that I didn’t even realize that he had put his hand over mine and was also holding the toy.

“You may get mad at me, and you may even hit me for this if you’d like, but don’t treat me like an idiot.” He brought his hand up and held my vibrator in front of me. “If this was your phone, it would have stopped vibrating.” His blue eyes were penetrating me. “If you need something to help you get off, I’d prefer it if you used me.”

Oh.

My.

Fucking.

God.