Текст книги "One and Done"

Автор книги: S. Briones Lim

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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 16 страниц)

Chapter 33

After six months of dating long distance, I couldn’t believe the day had finally come. Rocky was moving in with me! She was actually, ‘boxes-piled-high-in-my-car’ driving to Charleston for good!

I snuck a peek at her, wanting to pinch myself until my skin bled. Remembering our other friend’s elf erotica, I laughed. “Damn, guess Steph’s morbidity rubbed off on me after all. I’m starting to think in grotesque terms.”

“What was that?” she asked, never taking her eyes from the window.

“Never mind.” I chuckled lightly, but noticed the stiffening in her shoulders. All at once my initial jubilation dripped away. “Rocky…what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she answered quickly—a little too quickly.

“Rocky,” I said warningly.

She sighed, allowing her shoulders to sag forward. “I guess I’m just nervous. I mean, you know what happened to me in college.” Her mouth trembled while her eyes glazed over, as if bad memories attacked her. I wanted to help fight those demons away, but you could only do so much to a ghost. “I screwed everything up at Greystone. I let my fear and worry manifest into something that just fucked me up.” Pausing, her head snapped in my direction, startling me. “What if I do that again? What if I fuck up things with you?”

Switching hands on the steering wheel, I reached out and grabbed one of hers. It felt cold and clammy, almost as if I was hugging a corpse.

Stephanie, get out of my mind!

I shuddered and felt the corners of my mouth tug down. “Do you not want to move in with me?”

Even saying the words out loud hurt me to no end. I knew there was no way I was turning my car around and driving her back to Bethel Falls. Besides the fact that we were only thirty-minutes shy of Charleston, I could not—would not spend another day without her. The last six months had already been torture enough, and I wanted nothing more than to put those days behind me.

“No,” she replied meekly.

My eyes widened in shock. “No, as you don’t want to move in with me?”

“No!” She shook her head quickly. “I mean, no of course I want to move in. You didn’t let me finish.”

“Oh.” My mouth formed a perfect circle and I sighed with relief. “Then you have nothing to worry about. I’m sure it’ll take a little getting used to, but trust me, in three weeks it’ll feel like you belong here.”

She nodded and glanced back outside. “Trust me; I wanted this as much as you do.”

“Wanted?” I muttered.

“Want.” With a sly smile on her face, she peeked over her shoulder and abruptly pulled her hand from mine, pinching my side.

“Hey!” I screeched, instinctively jerking at the wheel. The car swerved, a symphony of car horns blaring around us.

“Sorry!” she gasped. A pinkish tint worked its way from her clavicle up her neck and to her cheeks. “I didn’t know you’d freak out like that.”

“I didn’t freak out.” I took a deep breath, straightening the car. Afraid to take my eyes off the road, I shook my head. “Just trust me on something, okay?”

“You’re driving?” she quipped.

I pursed my lips. “No, not my driving.”

Her answering giggle allowed me to relax. “Sure we have to get used to living with each other and I know it’s scary, but it’s all normal. We’re taking a big step—”

“Huge!” she interjected.

This time I couldn’t help but glance over. “I’ll take care of you. I promise you, you’ll love it here. I’ll never let anything bad happen to you.”

Her lips pursed together. “I hope you’re right.”

“I am.”

Bowing her head, she finally lifted the corners of her mouth. “I’m sorry I’m ruining this moment. Don’t think I’m not happy about what we’re doing. I guess seeing the ‘Now Leaving Bethel Falls’ sign kind of freaked me out.”

“Completely normal,” I assured her.

And that’s what we both need in our lives, a sense of normalcy.

“Yeah…” Her voice trailed off, still sounding unconvinced.

“Rocky, this is good. I promise.”

She nodded again, but didn’t say another word. At that moment, I didn’t want to admit it, but my stomach was also in knots. She shifted uneasily, pulling her hand away from mine, squeezing it between her thighs.

I know something else that wants to be squeezed in there.

I shook away the inappropriate thought and grimaced. “Don’t make me feel like I forced you to move down here. You know you didn’t have to accept my invitation, right?”

Not that it wouldn’t have broken my heart.

Peeking at me with anxious eyes, she replied, “I know this sounds stupid, but to me it’s make or break time.”

“What do you mean by ‘break time’? This is something you wanted, right? I thought we both wanted this. We’ve been looking forward to moving in together for months.”

“It is, we have, and I do,” she answered quickly. “You can’t fault me for being nervous about this. I guess it’s just finally hitting me that I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and clock in at Rossi’s.”

“Again I tell you, it is completely normal how you’re feeling.” I wanted nothing more than to wake her up from whatever delusional thoughts she was experiencing. However, I knew I had to be patient. Just like she was always patient with me.

She nodded, but didn’t respond. Soon we were basked in silence, enveloped by the warm melodic crooning of an old ’80s rock album. We both sunk into our seats, pretending that we did not just have the most awkward conversation ever. One thing was for sure, this certainly was not the ride I was expecting to have.

You’re both just getting used to the idea. It’ll be fine.

I ran through my motivational mantra over and over again, trying to convince myself that Rocky’s homesickness was just rubbing off on me. Still, I couldn’t ignore the blatant warning signs flashing through my head.

Out of all the times you take heed of warnings, now you do it?

I shook my head. No, I wouldn’t surrender to second thoughts. This was what we wanted. At least I thought it was…

“I’ll make sure you don’t regret moving down here,” I told her quietly.

She glanced over at me and smiled. “I won’t regret it.”

In a firmer tone I repeated, “I’ll make sure of it.”

Chapter 34

Rocky

Words can’t express how much I love Jesse. After years of pining from a distance I still couldn’t believe he was mine and I was his…

So why couldn’t I shake the feeling that moving in together was a bad idea? Especially since I was so excited about it and couldn’t wait until the moment came? So why did I suddenly feel so strange?

I pressed my cheek against the cloth of my seatbelt and shut my eyes for a moment, desperate to quiet my thoughts. I must have dozed off for a few minutes because when I finally reopened them all I saw was a mix of palm trees and weirdly colored buildings.

“We’re almost there…” I said to no one in particular.

“Mmhmm.” Jesse sounded distant, as if he were fighting his own demons. I wondered if he somehow doubted the ‘big move’ too. If he did, it was entirely my fault.

Whoa! Hold your horses! Did I say doubting?

Okay, I take that back. I didn’t doubt anything. I was scared…but that’s how I’ve always been about life. I couldn’t help myself. I’ve been coddled since birth and always had the safety net of family around me. What was I supposed to do, knowing my family and Stephanie were hundreds of miles away?

“We’re here.”

Can I repeat, hundreds of miles away.

“That we are.” I swallowed back a lump of anxiety and glanced around the apartment complex as I unbuckled my seatbelt. Eyeing the concrete steps, I grimaced. “We don’t have to move my stuff in yet, do we?” Surprise, anxiousness, and confusion flashed across my boyfriend’s face. Realizing my mistake, I quickly added, “I’m just zonked out from the ride. Can’t we do it tomorrow?”

He sighed with visible relief. “Okay, sounds good. I’ll order pizza for dinner. I don’t really feel up for cooking either.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Do you remember the first time we had pizza at your apartment?”

Grinning, he jogged around the car toward me to squeeze my waist. “How could I forget? First a sex dream and then—”

“Hey!” I yelped, interrupting him. “I did not have a sex dream.”

We both knew it was a lie, but I’d deny it until the end. I was still embarrassed by my little faux pas.

“Yeah, right.” His eyes brightened. “Either way I’ll make sure you dream about it tonight.”

***

“You want it harder?”

“Mmm, yeah,” I breathed.

For someone who was a late bloomed virgin, I definitely found my footing in the bedroom. Besides my first time with Jesse and second time with him in his car, we’ve had sex every single time we were together and then some. Let’s just say all that wait was well worth it.

I pushed myself up and quickly rolled onto my knees, sticking my ass into the air. Jesse with his expert skills, quickly ran his finger from my clit up to my lips, teasing me until I cried out for more.

“Patience, Rocky, patience,” he clucked.

He pulled back, leaving me whimpering in disappointment. Chuckling, he gripped onto my waist and gave one powerful thrust, filling me up completely. I had no choice but to gasp out in exhilaration. “Yes!”

Jesse leaned forward, leaving a trail of soft bites up and down my spine. I was right on the edge of ecstasy, but I didn’t want to finish this way.

“Stop!” I screeched.

“Huh?” Jesse immediately pulled out. I turned in time to catch him scratching his head, but before he could get a word out I pushed him onto the mattress and quickly straddled him. His lips curled into a sensual smile. “If you wanted to change positions you could have just asked.”

“What fun would that be?” I gulped, slowly sliding onto him until his thickness impaled me. Positioning myself into a good angle, I began to ride, grinding my hips until all the friction sent me over the edge.

My eyes were squeezed shut, but I felt Jesse grip my hips, pounding upwards in a fury as he joined me in my orgasm. Even with my head up in the clouds I couldn’t help but grin, knowing he enjoyed it as much as I did.

I climbed off of him and collapsed onto the mattress, squirming over so that my body molded against his. Quietly, I reached out and brushed his long strands from his eyes.

With a thoughtful smile on my lips, I whispered, “If living with you means doing that every night, then I wonder what took me so long.”

Opening his eyes slowly, a lazy grin appeared on his face. “Believe me; I’ve been wondering the same thing.”

Chapter 35

Rocky

The sunlight streamed in through Jesse’s curtains, momentarily blinding me. Yawning, I stretched my arms in the air, surprised not to feel Jesse’s warmth next to mine. Unlike the first ‘morning after’ experience, this time I felt confident knowing Jesse did not leave me for good. Taking my time, I padded toward the bedroom door and smiled when I heard the distinct pop of bacon on the stove.

“Aww, of course he’d cook for me.” A wistful smile played on my lips as I pushed through the door. As expected, Jesse was bent over the stove, but at the first sound of my footsteps he lifted his head and caught my eye, grinning from ear to ear.

He eyed my bare legs and whistled. “Whew! If this is what I get to wake up to every morning, then thank God for cohabitation!”

“Shh!” I giggled, suddenly feel self-conscious of my choice of attire. With only a threadbare shirt that rested on the top of my thighs, I was barely covered. “You’ll wake the neighbors.”

“Ah, I think we already woke them up last night.” He shot me a wink, further warming my core.

Ignoring the blood that rushed inside me, I scuffled to the nearest chair and plopped down. A yawn escaped my throat and I blinked away the last remnants of sleep.

“Ah, don’t tell me you’re still too tired to move your stuff in.” Jesse walked over, placing two platefuls of eggs and bacon in front of me. Though a smile played on his face, I couldn’t help but notice the slight jab in his words.

I tried to brush it off, but couldn’t help but feel my grin falter.

Whatever he’s feeling is your fault.

Clearing my throat, I inhaled the delicious scent of bacon, quickly changing the subject. “This is good. Thanks.”

He grabbed a napkin, whipping it through the air to unfold it. A light puff of air hit my face as he sat down next to me. “Best thing about living with a chef? You get meals like this every morning—”

Ring. Ring.

I blinked in surprise and glanced over at the counter where his cell phone was going crazy. “It’s only a little after eight on a Saturday. Who would be calling you?”

Jesse shrugged, but a fleeting look of worry touched his handsome features.

I shook my head and sighed. “This is exactly why I was nervous.”

“What? Because of a call?”

“Finding things out about you that I didn’t want to know,” I blurted out without heeding my words. “It seems like you don’t want to answer it for a reason.”

“What kind of things? I haven’t cheated on you, if that’s what you’re worried about.” And just like that, our good mood shifted once again.

What was the matter with me?

“I know…” I shrugged hesitantly. “It’s just…You had a life here without me and I know you’ve shared everything with me—”

“Everything.”

“Still…” What was I even saying anymore? I shook my head. “Forget about it. I’m just being stupid.”

The phone continued to ring and to my irritation Jesse still did not answer.

Then it hit me. It was as if Pandora’s box was opened. Finally understanding my trepidations, I jammed a forkful of bacon into my mouth, chewing loudly to drown out the cell phone’s noise. Swallowing once, I cocked my head to the side and threw him a meaningful look. “Honestly, I guess I’m a bit scared that there are still some things we don’t know about each other. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really excited about living with you, it’s just…”

“There’s still a part of you that doesn’t trust me, isn’t there?” he asked blandly.

I took a deep breath. “It’s not that I don’t trust you…”

“What?”

I licked my lips, tasting the salty grease of the bacon. Suddenly feeling parched, I reached out and poured myself a glass of water.

“Rocky,” he called out in a low tone. “What’s wrong?”

“Excitement…gulp…doesn’t even begin to describe…gulp…how I feel about being here…”

“But?”

“But like I said on the ride over here, this is make or break time. Moving in makes you discover things about one another and—”

“There’s nothing to discover,” he cut me off. “We know each other, Rocky. Like really know each other. I know we’ve had our share of bullshit in the past, but I thought we’d moved past that. What’s left to find out?”

My eyes darted around his apartment—a place I’d only visited a handful of times, but was suddenly my new home. It was odd to think that just the day before I was bursting at the seams, ready to walk to Charleston if I needed to, yet here I was, a ball of nervous energy.

How could my moods swing that quickly?

Jesse sighed and rubbed his hands over his face, tightening his lips. The ringing of his cell phone had stopped, but I couldn’t help but feel the ghost of its vibrations against my skin.

“Rocky…” He took a deep breath and stared intently at me. His eyes were so sincere that they almost vibrated energy. “I’m not going to leave you again.”

“What?” I asked in confusion.

“That’s why you’re nervous, isn’t it? I know…I know that six months is a bit too quick to move in together, but we’re in this for the long haul—I’m in this for the long haul. I’m sure that fear of me taking off is bothering you, but I thought we’d moved past that.”

“No, that’s not it…”

My voice trailed off. Was that what was bothering me?

I shook my head and sighed. “It’s something else. It may sound stupid, but I feel like there’s a cloud above me and at any moment it’ll break. Like I’m scared that if I’m too happy then it only leaves room for shit to hit the fan.”

His jaw dropped. “Okay, who are you and what have you done with my girlfriend?”

“I’m serious!” I yelped. “I can’t explain it, but I just feel an ominous presence…almost as if we’re about to face something big and it can—”

“Make or break us,” he finished for me.

“Yeah…”

A smile teased his face. “Ominous presence, huh? I swear to you that my apartment is not haunted.”

I shot him an unamused look. “Jesse…”

Ring. Ring. Ring.

“Well, there it goes again,” I muttered, blowing air between my lips.

“You know what, I’ll answer it.” Jesse rolled his eyes, standing abruptly. “If it’ll make you feel better I’ll show you that there’s nothing ‘ominous’ about living here. I’m not hiding anything from you.”

“I didn’t say you were,” I reminded him. “I just—”

“Hello?” he answered the phone loudly.

I snorted. “Okay, then.”

I picked at my food, but couldn’t help but listen in on a conversation with someone Jesse obviously knew. Feeling like a jealous girlfriend, I tried to distract myself. It definitely did not work.

“Why do you think I’d care?” he grunted, his eyebrows furrowing in disgust. “He is not my brother.”

My eyes widened in surprise. What the hell? Since when did Jesse have a brother?

“No! I won’t let him stay with me. You have a bigger place than I do…Rocky just got here. Why do you think—” As if remembering me for the first time, Jesse glanced over at me sheepishly. I lifted my eyebrows in both curiosity and confusion.

Jesse gulped and continued. “I won’t let him stay with us. I don’t care if Teresa wants to kick him out, that’s her own deal…then check him into rehab!”

There was no use trying to eat anymore. I pushed away my plate and sighed. If this wasn’t the ominous sign I was wary of, then I didn’t know what was anymore.

My boyfriend’s eyes darkened. His muscular shoulders slumped over while his biceps twitched rapidly. I eyed his hand, which was clenched so tightly around his phone that the knuckles began to turn white.

“Fine, we’ll check on him while you two are gone…I don’t care that he’s staying at your place without supervision, he’s older than me!”

Okay, that was definitely a surprise.

Jesse took one final breath and muttered, “You owe me, Dad,” before hanging up the phone.

A blanket of awkward silence covered the entire room. After a few moments I cooed, “So…You have a brother.”

“No. I have a jerk that by law is called my stepbrother,” he snapped in reply. Inhaling loudly, he rubbed at his forehead and shook his head in exasperation. “I’ve gone four years without having to speak to him, and of course the first day you’re here he shows up, completely hammered, at Dad’s house.”

Remembering his conversation, I asked, “So why do you have to check on him?”

He looked at me and answered simply, “Because apparently my life sucks.”

***

So much for a fun first day together. After an awkward breakfast, Jesse and I found ourselves en route to the “new” Tyler house. Though he begged me not to go, there was no way I’d allow him to face whatever monsters he had alone. As we navigated through a bunch of backroads, Jesse gave me what I could only call the Cliff Notes version of his infamous stepbrother, Jason.

“Jason’s a jerk, plain and simple. He tried to drug me—”

“What?” I exclaimed in shock. “Why didn’t your dad do anything about it?”

“I couldn’t prove it.” He shrugged his shoulders as if it were nothing but a minute worry.

“Jesse—”

“Forget I mentioned it.” He waved me off.

How the hell was I going to do that?

“Anyway, I did my best to avoid him, which wasn’t hard to do since he spent most of his time up north. I guess he graduated from college and had a great job up there.”

“So what happened?”

“Apparently the shit hit the fan—or rather his bad personality and karma caught up with him. He lost everything and when I say everything, I mean everything—fiancée, job, house, car. Now he’s in a deep pit of despair and obviously on a quest to drag everyone down with him.”

“Okay, so I still don’t know what this has to do with you,” I interjected.

He sighed, gripping the steering wheel tightly. “His mom tried to get him help for his addictions and I guess he sobered up for a while.”

“Until all this bad stuff happened to him,” I assumed.

He nodded. “So when he showed up on her doorstep lit like a candle, she didn’t want to deal with it anymore. She told him he couldn’t stay there, but seeing as he had no place to go…”

“He’s not living with us, is he?” I cried out in shock. Moving in with Jesse was already a big step enough as it was. I couldn’t imagine having to get used to living with two males.

“No, of course not.”

I sighed with relief.

“But I promised Dad I’d check up on him today. Apparently Teresa couldn’t deal with it and walked out of the house last night. Dad’s following her up to her parents’ house in Virginia, but he doesn’t trust that Jason won’t trash the place while they’re gone.”

I gulped. “Somehow I don’t feel safe in all this.”

Jesse reached out and grabbed my hand. “Hey, I said I’d take care of you, didn’t I? Trust me, everything will be fine.”

I nodded my head, but didn’t believe him. That darkness I felt loomed even closer now.