Текст книги "I am free "

I laughed at her note.

Under her scribbled handwriting was Preston’s phone number and a smiley face. I wondered what he wanted. I hadn’t spoken to him in a while. Our last date or double date I should say went really good. He was so nice.

I picked up the phone and dialed his number.

“Hello,” his voice came over the line.

“Hey Preston it’s Grace.”

“Grace,” I could hear a smile in his voice. “I’m so glad that you called me back. I’ve been so busy lately and I’m sorry I haven’t called sooner.”

“That’s okay. What’s up?” I asked and smirked. As soon as those words left my mouth, I knew that I sounded just like Kennedy.

“I was hoping that the two of us could get together tonight for dinner. If you want?” He asked.

“Ugh,” I stuttered over my words. “Just the two of us?”

I could hear a faint laughter from him through the phone. I must have sounded like a complete idiot.

“I was kind of hoping it would just be the two of us.”

I sat there for a moment not saying anything. This would be a real date. Not that the others weren’t real, but this would be different. The word “alone” was flashing through my head like a Las Vegas street sign.

“Oh, uh.” I struggled.

“Unless you don’t want to.” He said quickly.

“No, I do. I’m sorry. I’d love to.” I replied, trying to hide the nerves from my voice.

“Good, okay. I’ll pick you up at seven?”

“Sure, that sounds good.”

“See you then.”

“Bye.”

I hung up the phone.

Holy moly. I was going on a date. Alone. In one hour.

I picked up the phone and dialed Kennedy as fast as my fingers could dial.

As soon as she answered I cut her off instantly.

“No time for small talk Mrs. President. I have a date with Preston in one hour. Alone.”

“Shit, no way.”

“Yes way.” I nodded my head even though she couldn’t see me through the phone.

She laughed loudly into my ear. “Well sister, you’re on your own on this one. I can’t come and lend a hand because I am buried under a pile of homework. Besides you don’t need me. Wear that light blue skirt and the cute white top that Darcy got you, and don’t forget your lipstick.”

“What am I going to say? What will he talk about? What if he wants things from me, like romance kind of things?” All of my words slurred together.

“Grace! Calm down. It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do. That’s the good thing about having a vagina.”

“Don’t say vagina.” I replied.

“Well I’m not calling it a monkey. I refuse.”

I sighed. She was insatiable.

“Just be yourself and have fun.” She said.

“Okay, but be ready for a long phone conversation when it’s over.”

“I’m here for you babe.”

“I better go get ready.” I sounded far from enthused.

“Have fun.” She said and the line went dead.

The nerves had set in and I was not at all ready for this date. I hoped that our conversations would be as easy as before, not complicated because we were alone. I didn’t want there to be awkwardness between the two of us. Preston seemed like a really nice guy. I mean, he’s no Jackson, but I can’t compare the two. They are night and day. One guy likes me and wants to spend actual time with me, while the other is on the fence. One day Jackson likes me, and the next day he doesn’t. I can’t make him want to see me or spend time with me, especially when I have someone else who really does want to spend time with me.

There had to be no more Jackson nonsense.

I rushed up the stairs to get ready for my date.

I took Kennedy’s advice and put on my light blue skirt. It only took me about twenty minutes to get ready, so I had to sit for thirty minutes on the couch with butterflies in my stomach. So many thoughts were running through my mind.

Would he be a gentleman? He had been so far.

Would he want more from me? I had no idea.

There were so many unanswered questions. I wondered if this is what all girls went through before a date. I was going to give myself an ulcer just thinking about it.

The knock on the door couldn’t have come at a better time.

I peeked out the side glass to make sure it was him, and it was. Opening the door, I found Preston standing there with a small bouquet of flowers. He looked so cute and sweet standing there. I instantly felt much better.

“You look great.” He said as he handed me the flowers.

“Thank you.” I opened the door wider. “Come in.” I smelled the fresh flowers for a moment. It was very thoughtful. “I’ll just take these to the kitchen, then we can go.”

He waited patiently for me in the living room. His bright smile lit up the place. It made me smile too. I liked the way he felt so comfortable around me. It made such a difference. His confidence was one of the things I liked most about him. He was never ashamed to be seen with me. It was nice.

“I’m ready,” I said once I realized that I had stood there far too long staring at him. He hadn’t noticed that I was, thank goodness.

Once we were inside his car, I finally asked where we were going.

“I thought we’d have dinner, and then we could just take a walk if you want.” He answered as he pulled away from the curb.

“That sounds nice.”

We chatted lightly all the way to dinner. He was so easy to talk to. I don’t know why I had gotten myself all worked up. It was all for nothing. He could easily lead a conversation and I never felt uneasy. Even the silence wasn’t awkward.

The only thing that bothered me was that in those few moments of silence, my mind wandered back to Jackson. No matter how hard I tried to keep him out, he was always there.

Those lips.

Those eyes.

I wondered if for one single moment he thought of me too.

20

Jackson

It’s our last night of freedom before basketball season starts full force. One last hooray and we usually did it up right. I planned on drinking until I didn’t know my name, or Grace’s.

Yep, she was still on my mind, every fucking minute of every fucking day.

I thought I could do it, that I could handle whatever was happening between us. I was beyond wrong. It scared the hell out of me. Scared me bad enough to make me run.

Her kiss was like fire and ice. It freaking sucked me in, so bad that I thought I’d die from it. Death from kiss…

Right, like that hasn’t been done before.

How about death from shriveled up balls? That sounded more likely.

I was meeting the guys at the bar for a few drinks before we headed to the park. We always ended Freedom Night with a bonfire and music at the park just outside of town. It was a secluded place where we could do just about anything we wanted, and we never got caught.

Reaching on my nightstand I grabbed my cell phone and my keys. The night was young, and I was ready to kick it with my friends. I wanted a drama free, alcohol filled, night of fun.

I met Jeremy at his house, and left my truck parked in his driveway. By the end of the night, I was hoping that I wouldn’t remember my name let alone be able to drive. He came out of his front door just as I was making my way on to the porch.

“Hey man. Right on time, you ready to go?” He asked.

I nodded. “It’s been a long damn day. I’m ready to blow off some steam.”

“You and me both brother.”

“Are all the rest of the guys meeting us there?” I hadn’t spoke to any of them, so I didn’t know what their plans were.

“Yeah, they’re probably half lit by now. You talked to Holly?”

I groaned.

“Sorry man, I was just wondering.”

“It’s not you. I’m just aggravated. I want to drink away the thought of all females tonight.”

He laughed as he started the car. “You got it. But just so you know, she’ll probably be there tonight.”

“Well, I hope I’m drunk by the time she shows up.”

He cranked up the stereo as we headed towards the bar. There was no more talk about Holly or any other girls. We wouldn’t have a chance to speak anyway with his stereo volume set on max. The car rattled and thumped all the way there.

I rubbed my ears as I stepped out of the car and onto the curb. “I don’t know why you have to listen to that crap so loud.”

“It’s better that way you big baby.” He tossed his arm across my shoulder. “Us big boys like our music loud, and our women even louder. If you know what I’m sayin?”

I just shook my head. “I hear you, loud-n-clear.”

After a couple of hours at the bar we decided to head down to the park. The bar was too damn crowded, and it took too long to get a drink. Thank goodness we started with the shots. I felt really good. Not drunk but good. We loaded the cars up with as many as we could fit inside and took off.

Pulling onto the gravel driveway that led to the field next to the park, I noticed that there were a lot more cars than usual. We had to park pretty far back, and walk most of the way. The music was loud, and coming from somebody’s pickup parked close to the bonfire. The night air was cool, and people were all over. It didn’t feel crowded like the bar, and I suddenly wished we had just come here first.

I spotted the keg of beer as we closed in on the crowd of people. I took off in that direction.

“Where you going?” Jeremy hollered.

“To get a beer.” I called back over my shoulder.

It was wide open. I filled my cup full, and took a sip when I heard Holly’s voice from behind me.

“Jack,” she said in a sultry, smooth voice.

It didn’t repel me like it normally would. Must have been all the booze. I felt her hand touch my back and move lower as she stepped in front of me.

“I’ve missed you baby.” She whispered into my ear.

I didn’t respond, because I knew I hadn’t missed her. Except maybe the way she touched me. I may have missed that a little.

She started to say more, so I tipped back the cup and finished it in one drink.

“You want to go someplace quiet?” She purred as she ran her hands along my chest.

It didn’t mean that I wanted to get back together. I just craved her touch. There were needs. I had needs.

She linked her finger through the belt loop of my jeans and tugged me forward. I was game. My mind was a bit fuzzy, but I knew what I was doing. I didn’t lead her on. I didn’t come on to her. But you can’t tell a sexy girl no. Not when her touch was so familiar. I was just getting her out of my system.

Fuck it.

Who cared anyway? I didn’t

I let her take me, in more ways than one.

21

Grace

“Okay, which one do you like?” Aunt Darcy held up two brightly colored cell phones.

“You really think it’s necessary?”

“YES!” Both Darcy and Kennedy said in unison.

Okay.

Both phones looked so expensive, but Aunt Darcy said not to worry. She was putting me on her plan.

“The red one.” I smiled and snatched the phone. I was actually really excited, but I didn’t want to show it. I didn’t want to feel like I was using my aunt, but she was so persistent. It was for my own safety.

“I knew you’d choose that one. You little rebel.” Kennedy said nudging my arm.

It was pretty. Red had become my favorite color. It matched my toes, and my lips.

“You have to show me how to use this thing.” I said to Kennedy as we walked up to the counter to purchase the phone. “And while we are here, take me to the makeup store. I want some red lipstick.” I was feeling a little rebellious, now that she’d mentioned it.

Kennedy started cheering inside the store like a crazy lady, and drawing all kinds of attention. It was hilarious. We were a perfect pair, the two of us.

“Oh, Mom and Dad are home tonight, and she’s making a big dinner. She asked if I wanted to invite you over to eat. What do you say? They are dying to meet you.”

“That sounds like fun.” Darcy chimed in.

It did. I hadn’t met her parents yet, because they were rarely home. I wanted to though. Kennedy always talked about them, and they seemed like such great people. Different from what I was used to. I couldn’t wait to meet them.

“Sounds great.” I said cheerfully.

For hours, Kennedy and I played on my new phone. She showed me all kinds of things. The camera was my favorite though. We must have taken a thousand photos. Some were goofy, and others were sweet. I never had a camera growing up. I think we may have taken family photos once my whole life, and only one single picture was hung up in our house. My Mom and Dad’s wedding photo sat on the mantle in the living room. That was it.

Kennedy drove us to her house just after five o’clock. When we walked inside, I got kind of nervous about seeing Jackson. We hadn’t spoken in a while, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to see his face. Those beautiful eyes, and that wicked grin, of course I wanted to see him. Who was I kidding? The stupid boy was crowding my brain more often than not. So much so that I hadn’t even paid attention to Mr. Black Sheep himself, that stood in the living room.

“Well if it isn’t Gracie.” Tucker called out from the living room as we were walking through. “You are even more beautiful today.” He winked.

I smiled back at him and shook my head. I don’t know how he did it. He had to be the most charming human being on the planet. “Thank you.” I replied.

“Shouldn’t you be home eating your own food Tuck?” Kennedy linked her arm through mine and pulled me into the kitchen. I waved over my shoulder at Tucker because I just couldn’t help myself. He was always so sweet to me, and despite what everyone said, I didn’t think he was a black sheep.

Resting against the island in the kitchen were Kennedy’s parents, both of them. They smiled big as we walked into the room. I instantly smiled back at their warm faces.

“Hey guys,” Kennedy spoke first. “This is Grace.” The two of them walked over to where we stood. “Grace these are my parents Nick and Claire.”

I knew what was coming, and I was prepared. Claire hugged me first. “It’s so nice to finally meet you.” She said. “Kennedy talks about you all the time. You are just as beautiful as she described.”

Wow. That was so sweet. “Thank you. It’s nice to meet you too. Thank you for having me for dinner.”

“Of course. You’re welcome to have dinner with us anytime you like.” Her smile stretched across her face. She looked nothing like what I’d pictured. Her long dark hair and wide set eyes were beautiful. I don’t think any of the kids looked like her. Except for maybe that smile, they all shared that warm smile.

“Come here sweetheart,” I slipped into Nick’s arms for a quick hug. Instantly I wondered if I’d ever get used to all the hugs. I had my doubts. He kept hold of my arms as he stepped back to take a look.

“Pretty isn’t she.” I heard Tucker’s voice, and flushed red.

“Don’t mind him. I’m glad you could join us. You make yourself at home okay?”

“Yes sir.” I replied.

“You call me Nick.” He nodded.

“Okay.”

There was something about the way that he said “home” that made me feel more comfortable. They really did have a home here. There were two nice parents who loved each other, and kids who adored them. My home wasn’t like this, at least not my old home. It was getting better everyday though.

“Supper is ready if you guys want to find a seat in the dining room.” Claire said as she kissed Kennedy on the cheek.

“Come on Gracie. You can sit beside me.” Tucker said as he pulled me through the kitchen.

Oh Joy!! I was guaranteed to spend the entire meal wearing a red face thanks to Tucker.

The table seated six people. Kennedy’s parents sit on each end. Tucker and I sat next to each other, and Kennedy was directly across from me. She and I both sat next to her mom. It didn’t go unnoticed that there was an empty seat.

“He’s on his way.” Tucker whispered in my ear.

I looked at him and quickly at my plate. He’d caught my eyes lingering on the empty chair. Talk about uncomfortable. I tried hard to act like what he said didn’t affect me, but it did. He was coming. Jackson would be there any minute.

“Stop worrying your pretty head.”

I looked back up at Tucker who was grinning.

“Are you psychic or something?” I asked him in a low voice.

“Nope. You are just so easy to read.”

“Shit!” Kennedy had said the same thing to me before. If they could read me so well, then so could Jackson. I must’ve looked like an idiot in front of them.

All eyes were on me. And it dawned on me, what I had said. I’d cussed, loudly, and in front of everyone at the table. If I weren’t embarrassed before then I was now. I slapped my hand over my mouth quickly, and started to apologize. I couldn’t believe that I’d done that. I was making a wonderful impression. I hadn’t even really cussed in front of Kennedy. Those words were usually left in my head where they belonged.

Tucker started to laugh, and everyone joined in. Even Claire and Nick couldn’t hold it together. Laughter filled the room. Once Kennedy joined in, I couldn’t help but laugh too. It really was funny. My father would have washed my mouth out with soap and would’ve beaten me to a pulp. But here they just laughed, and so did I.

“What’s so funny?” Jackson said as he locked eyes with me as he walked into the room. He was wearing a jersey, so he must have just gotten out of basketball practice. All the air in my lungs left swiftly. He had that effect on me.

“You missed it Jackson. Little Gracie said the word shit in front of everyone.” Kennedy said, and I smiled at her. I still couldn’t find any words or any air for that matter.

“Sorry I missed it.” Jackson said as he looked at me again.

I wasn’t. I was glad he wasn’t there to see me make a fool of myself.

Conversation picked up as they discussed basketball, and school. They gave me plenty of time to relax before they asked me any questions. I was grateful. I told them about my Mom, Dad, and brother who were back home, but didn’t give any details. I also told them about my plan to attend college as soon as I had saved up the money. They were such genuine people. They listened to me as I spoke. It was lighthearted and nice, and I really enjoyed myself.

I tried my best not to look in Jackson’s direction anymore, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. My eyes seemed trained in that direction. Luckily Tucker’s carefree conversation swayed me at times.

“How old are you Tucker?” I asked.

“Too damn old for you,” he replied. “And it sucks.”

A small laugh escaped and I glanced again in Jackson’s direction. He looked mad. His eyebrows were drawn together in a hard line, but not at me. He was looking right at Tucker. There was some kind of silent conversation going on between the two of them. The more Tucker smiled, the angrier Jackson got. I turned my head, pretending not to notice and joined into the conversation with Claire and Kennedy. They were discussing Kennedy’s job at the Library, and I hung onto their every word. I was trying my best not to have my attention appear elsewhere. Something was up between the two of those boys, and I didn’t want any part in it. The less I knew, the better.

It only took one meal with Kennedy’s parents for me to know that they were amazing people. I had such a great time, despite my awakened feelings for Jackson arriving at dinner.

I offered to help Claire clear the dishes and clean up, but she wouldn’t have it. No matter how many times I told her that I didn’t mind, she’d say no every time.

I had to be at work first thing the next morning, so I was ready to leave. Aunt Darcy wanted to spend a little time with me before she left on her trip with Paul. He was taking her some place special for Thanksgiving, which was only a few days away. I was thrilled that for a short period of time, she wouldn’t have to worry so much about taking care of me. She could spend time with Paul, and focus on her love for him. It seemed that ever since I’d arrived into town, she’d been fussing and worrying about me. That’s not how I wanted it to go. I wanted her to pretend that I wasn’t there. I wanted her to go about her every day life as if I wasn’t intruding. That hadn’t happened.

“Thank you so much for having me over for dinner. I really had a great time.” I said to Claire as she was wiping the table off in the dining room.

“Oh honey, are you leaving?”

“I have to work in the morning, and Aunt Darcy is leaving on a holiday trip tomorrow night. I wanted to spend a little time with her before she left.” I explained.

“How nice. What will you do for Thanksgiving? You can’t spend it all alone. You have to come spend it with us. I insist.”

“I…” I started to protest, but Claire’s eyes were so sincere. “I… I’d love to.” I replied.

Claire clapped her hands together in excitement. “We like to host a dinner party, so it’s kind of a big thing. You should bring a date?” She winked.

A date?

I hadn’t realized that I would need a date. Would Jackson bring his girlfriend? I couldn’t be the only person at the party without a date. Or could I? If Kennedy didn’t bring someone, then neither would I.

“It’s okay dear.” She leaned in close. “Sometimes you have to bring other boys, so that you can make that special one jealous.” She whispered.