Текст книги "Thizz, A Love Story"

Автор книги: Nicole Loufas

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Текущая страница: 8 (всего у книги 19 страниц)

We assemble around the fire and Heather explains the rules. “Ok, this is just like truth or dare, but you flip a coin. Heads—truth, tails—dare. Then we spin an empty bottle to see who gets to ask the question or give the dare. Everyone got it?" She doesn’t wait for a response. She flips the coin to go first.

I’m sitting next to the fire with Nick on my left. Matt is next to him. Arnie and Heather sit directly across from us. The fire is our sixth player, since K decided to be the referee. On the outside I seem super excited to play Heather’s game, but I have a knot in my stomach the size of a grapefruit. I hate games. Especially ones with the words truth and dare in them.

"Truth," Heather announces.

The empty beer bottle makes two quiet rotations in the sand before stopping in front of Nick. I do a happy dance inside, thankful it’s just a question she is getting from him.

"Do you think Matt is hot?" Nick asks while punching Matt in the arm.

"Cop out!" Arnie calls through his hands.

"Yes," Heather answers flatly. She holds the coin in front of me and says, “Clockwise.”

I flip the coin low and catch it. It's hard to focus on the images. The more I concentrate, the more my eyes ping-pong from side to side. Nick takes my blindness as hesitation and rubs my back. He leans into me and kisses my cheek. I giggle when his warm breath tickles my neck. I’m lost in the euphoria of Nick. His smell, his hands on my bare skin. This feels nice.

“Ahem.” Arnie clears his throat. “Can we get back to the game?”

"Tails," Nick calls to the group as he continues to kiss the space behind my ear.

Oh shit, tails.

Nick hands me the bottle. “Spin it,” he says with an encouraging smile. It spins once, twice, three times, before stopping in front of Matt.

"Dude! You better make it good!” Arnie warns him.

The wicked look on Matt’s sweet face is misplaced. I know he wouldn’t do anything to embarrass me. Would he? "Dani," he clears his throat, "I dare you to let Nick..."

I exhale when I hear Nick’s name.

"Fuck that," Arnie interrupts. "You can't dare her to do something with Nick. That’s not fair."

"Shut the fuck up, Arn! You don’t even know what I'm going to say."

"It doesn’t matter. I know it’s going to suck!”

Matt flips Arnie off with both hands just inches from his face.

"Just go!" Heather yells, bringing their focus back to the game.

Matt elbows Arnie, who is steadily tossing sand in his lap.

"Ok Dani, I dare you to let Nick kiss your chest." Matt seems very pleased with himself.

That doesn’t sound too bad. "Over my shirt or under?”

"Under," Arnie answers for him.

My bra is black with little silver stars; it looks just like a bikini top. Considering we are on a beach, it’s very appropriate. I start to lift my t-shirt when Heather yells for me to stop.

"No, no she doesn’t have to take off her shirt." Heather is the only one brave enough to stand up to Arnie.

Heather, my new friend. I can’t believe I was about to strip in front of the guys. Damn you, thizz.

After a few minutes of bickering, Matt restates the dare. “She has to lift her shirt, but she doesn’t have to take it off.”

I smile thankfully at Heather. She really is a great friend.

Nick scoots closer to me. His head is lower than mine, so I can’t read the look in his eyes when he lifts my t-shirt. This is the most intimate we’ve ever been, and we have an audience to witness it.

"Wait!" Arnie shouts. "What about her bra?”

"Matt said chest, not breasts." I look to my new ally—she nods her head in agreement.

"That's bullshit,” Arnie exclaims. “You're cheating. You meant breasts, right Matt?" Arnie makes air quotes when he says the word breasts. I think it’s probably the first time he’s used the term to describe a girl’s anatomy.

Matt squirms uncomfortably beside Nick. I know he’s trying to choose between the lesser of two evils: humiliate me, or piss off Arnie.

I don’t care how messed up my brain is right now. I draw the line at nudity.

"I said chest, but technically, that means breast,” Matt reiterates. He also air quotes the word breasts.

"No, it isn't the same thing," Heather argues.

"K, we need a ruling," Nick finally calls over the fire.

"Chest is not breast," K declares. We all giggle when K makes over-exaggerated air quotes.

"Yes!" I cheer, lifting my hand to Heather, flaunting the high five in Arnie's face.

"Ok, just do it," Arnie hisses.

Nick lifts the front of my t-shirt. I feel his warm breath on my skin as his lips move over my bra. Although the fire is scorching my back, cold chills run through my body. I look up from the top of Nick's head at Matt. He isn’t even watching. His eyes are focused on the beer bottle in his hand.

"Enough," I say, pushing Nick away.

Arnie's hands are already up in the air for a high five when Nick returns to his spot.

I hand Nick the coin and lower my shirt. Nick flips it so high I lose sight of it. It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to focus. Nick announces he has truth and spins the bottle. It lands between me and Heather. After some deliberation on whether it means he should run through the fire, K decides he should spin again. Nick’s second spin makes one perfect rotation and stops in front of me. I know exactly what I’m going to say, but I can barely contain my laughter long enough to get the words out. "Nick, have you peed the bed in the last year?"

He looks at me, stunned that I would reveal his secret. "Yes—but let me explain," he yells. It’s too late, the guys are already rolling in the sand, calling him piss-head.

I laugh until my stomach hurts.

“I can’t believe you told my secret!” Nick grabs me in a bear hug. “That reminds me, you still owe me a secret.”

I can’t tell him my secret, not now. Not when I feel this good. This truthful.

“I know.” I kiss him. It’s a long, deep kiss. The kind of kiss that makes you forget what you were talking about.

“Alright, guys. Let’s play.” Heather brings everyone’s attention back to the game.

Thank you, Heather.

Matt flips the coin next. “Truth.” His bottle spins at least four times before finally landing on Heather.

She claps her hands and sits up. "Matt, who do you think is prettier, me or Dani?”

Matt doesn’t hesitate, he just blurts out my name. Heather smiles, seeming satisfied with his response. Her reaction is odd to me, even with my flawed senses. Why would she want Matt to choose me over her? Heather isn’t the type of girl that likes to lose.

Arnie snatches the coin from Matt and flips it high in the air. It seems to be lost in the stars until Arnie yells, "Tails baby!” He jumps to his feet and dances in the sand.

"Come and spin, dumbass." Matt rolls the bottle to Arnie.

Arnie squats down and focuses on his spin. He lines up the neck of the bottle so it points directly into the fire and gives it a hard, firm spin. We wait breathlessly for it to stop. There is a collective sigh of relief when the mouth of the bottle lands in front of Arnie.

“I get to choose my own dare,” he declares. As if any of us could come up with something outrageous enough for his standards. "Let's see.” He taps a finger to his chin while surveying the group. I notice I’m not the only one trying to avoid eye contact, fearing he will take it as a request to join him on whatever he is scheming. "I dare myself to jump in the ocean—naked!" he says, then takes off running towards the water line.

"You're a fucking idiot!" Matt screams as he jumps up and follows him.

Arnie stops a few feet from where the surf cuts through the sand, takes off his shirt, and drops his pants and boxers in one quick motion. Even from where we stand, we hear his muffled scream over the roar of the ocean when his naked body comes into contact with the freezing cold water. He splashes frantically, fighting to get back on his feet as the waves crash around him. I almost feel sorry for the idiot.

The guys finally make their way back to the circle, and Arnie regales us with the details of his swim. If I didn’t see it for myself, I might have actually believed his distorted version, which included spotting a shark fin.

Matt leaves the guys standing at the fire and sits down next to me. “How you feeling?”

“I’m great!” I get a nice surge of adrenaline as I suck down half a bottle of water.

“Are you mad at me?” Matt looks at me with his crystal-blue eyes and I swear I see dolphins swimming in them. His eyes. Those eyes. Those secretive, curious eyes.

I shake my head, because I’m at a loss for words.

“Good.” He smiles, and my heart kicks back into motion.

“Why would I be mad at you?” I clear my throat and try to gain some composure. It’s really difficult to pretend that the look on Matt’s face doesn’t knock the air out of my lungs. That the touch of his hand on my leg doesn’t send my pulse into hyper drive.

“Because of the dare.”

“No, it’s just a game.” I lean into his shoulder. “Just wait until you see what I have planned for you.” Matt gives me a curious smile and bites his lip.

Oh my God.

All conversation stops when we hear Nick’s cell phone ring. He answers it and walks away from the fire. Matt leans over and turns the music louder, which seems weird to me.

“Who is Nick always talking to on the phone?” I’ve asked Matt this question before, but maybe one day he’ll tell me the truth.

“It’s just family business.” He shrugs.

I look at my watch. “What kind of family business does he need to take care of at midnight?”

Matt fidgets with a bottle cap before tossing it in the fire. “He has a lot of family obligations, you know what I mean?”

“No, not really.” Nick told me he wants nothing to do with his family’s business. Was that bullshit?

“His grandmother depends on him a lot to help with tenants and stuff.” He places his hand on my leg. “You have nothing to worry about.”

Matt’s wrong. The tingles shooting up my thigh are definitely something to worry about.

Nick hangs up and walks back to the fire. Matt removes his hand and nudges me with his shoulder. “Hey, don’t mention the calls to him. He hates talking about his family, you know.”

“I know,” I assure him. I won’t say a word.

Arnie stumbles in front of us and I lean towards Matt to avoid being trampled. Matt slides his arm behind me, cradling the small of my back with his hand. I want to blame the drugs, but I wasn’t this tingly when Arnie held me.

Arnie grabs Heather and starts dancing with her in a way that could be considered sexual harassment. “Dude, get a room!” Matt yells at them, which only makes it worse. Matt’s face, lit by the fire, is beautiful. I don’t want to look away, but I have to. I have to be stronger than thizz. I don’t know what’s wrong with me tonight.

I turn my attention to Arnie and Heather. The obnoxiously red lipstick Heather had on has faded. Her wavy blonde hair and curvy shape form the outline of the perfect female body.

“Does Nick think she’s pretty?” I wonder aloud.

Matt snorts next to me. “Nick loves you, Dani.”

My heart is in my throat. I don’t know if hearing Nick say it would have the same effect on me. Somehow Matt’s words make it real. If the person that knows Nick better than anyone in the world can see that he loves me, then having Nick say it is unnecessary. Matt withdrawals his hand from around my back and grips his knees. He just told me his best friend is in love with me, and all I can think about is how badly I miss being in his arms.

The song ends and Heather drops to her knees in front of us. "My turn.” She flips the coin. “Tails.” She spins the bottle. It makes an entire rotation before stopping at Arnie. He jumps up and does a victory dance, kicking sand all over everyone. I open another bottle of water and take a long drink, swishing it around, replenishing the moisture that is missing from my mouth. Nick sits down beside me and I offer him the water.

“No, I’m good.” He smiles and his jaw tightens. He rolls his neck and focuses on Arnie. He looks different to me somehow. Like Matt just peeled a layer of skin off of him and I can see something that wasn’t apparent before. Or maybe I could and I just didn’t want to believe it.

"Heather—I dare you to kiss Dani,” Arnie announces with an evil grin plastered on his face.

I choke on a mouthful of water. What did he just say? My eyes shoot across the fire. “French kiss," he clarifies, so there will be no arguments.

I look at Heather. She seems unaffected by the dare, like she was expecting it. "I'm down," she proclaims.

Everyone’s eyes move in my direction. I instinctively look to Nick, who’s smiling at Arnie as Heather crawls over to me like a cat in heat. She arches her back and licks her lips in an effort to win over the boys. She stops in front of me and sits up on her knees. “Well, are you in?”

I look at the guys, who anxiously await my next move. I clear my throat and take one more sip of water.

“I knew she wouldn’t do—” she starts to say, but before Heather can finish her sentence, I grab the back of her head and kiss her. Her lips are small and unsure. I am definitely the aggressor. She tried to one-up me, and I beat her at her own game! I hear a rumble of moans as I move my mouth over hers. She finally yanks free to a roar of cheers.

She recovers quickly and forces a smile. "You little slut," she sneers before crawling back to her spot.

I receive a high five from Arnie and a quick kiss from Nick.

"Your turn," Heather says and holds out the coin.

I snatch it from her and flip it in the air, watching carefully to make sure it lands in my palm. Tails—another dare. The group is silent as I spin the bottle. It makes two rotations before landing in front of my worst nightmare—Arnie. The guys get excited at the possibility of some more girl-on-girl action. My teeth chatter out of control as I wait for him to speak.

Arnie isn’t smiling. He isn’t laughing. He’s so serious it gives me chills. "Dani, I dare you to kiss Matt.”

Before I can respond, Matt is on his feet. "No way dude, that's just wrong!” Matt says all the right things, mounts the perfect argument. He says all the things I should say, but I don’t say anything.

"If you want to be a punk, then you shouldn't play." Arnie looks directly at me. "K, back me up here."

K shakes his head. "No way, this is Nick’s rule.”

All eyes turn to Nick. His face is expressionless.

"Nick," I say quietly and reach for his hand. I need to know what he’s thinking.

Nick pulls his hand free and runs it through his hair. "Arnie's right, we decided to play.”

“That’s bullshit,” Matt yells. "Arnie made up his own dare!"

I reach for Nick again. This time he takes my hand and squeezes it tight before letting go.

Matt drops to his knees beside Nick. "Dude, it’s not right.”

Nick stares into the fire, rolling his beer bottle between his hands.

“Man up, Matt. Nick said it was cool. Hell, I’d kiss her.” Arnie laughs as he punches Matt in the back.

“Then you should’ve kissed her instead of running around here naked, dipshit!” Matt chucks a handful of sand. Arnie turns away and takes the brunt of it on the side of his head. He doesn’t respond to Matt’s hostility. He just puts his arm around Heather and smiles. Heather might as well be screaming with joy, it’s so obvious she wants this to happen. If I kiss Matt, all gloves are off. Anything goes. So much for Heather being my ally.

“Nick, you’re seriously cool with this?” K isn’t really buying Nick’s calm exterior. Neither am I.

"Yeah, it doesn't mean anything, right Matt?” Nick locks eyes with Matt.

Matt looks at Nick then looks at me. “Nope.”

My jaw drops. Is this really happening? I should object. I should say something. But I don’t.

Nick turns to me. "Dani, don't worry about it." He pats my hand. “It’s just a game.”

I look from my hand in Nick’s to Heather. She’s got a front-row seat to my humiliation.

"Alright. Nick ruled—do it," Arnie demands.

My eyes dart from Heather’s traitorous glare to Matt. He looks at Nick then back to me and suppresses a smile. He rubs his hand over his face as if he’s wiping the grin away. My heart races at the small evidence of betrayal that crosses his face. He wants to kiss me.

I can pretend to be upset, disgusted, and embarrassed, but inside I have a small smile of my own. I make my away around Nick to kneel in front of Matt. The only sound in the air is the crackling fire and the pounding, relentless waves crashing behind me. Matt lifts his hand to my cheek and my lips part. I close my eyes as he leans in and places his mouth on mine. Glorious sensations flood my body. His tongue slips into my mouth and I open my eyes. It’s strange to see someone other than Nick so closely, but I’m grateful it’s Matt and not one of the other guys. After a few seconds, Matt opens his eyes and jerks away, like he just woke from a bad dream. We quickly break apart and look around, waiting for someone to speak. Nobody does. They looked stunned, like they can’t believe we went through with it. I know I am. We return to our spots on either side of Nick. I don’t have the courage to look at Nick. If he’s hurt, I don’t want to see it. If he’s angry, I can’t deal with it. I figure it’s best to sit back and avoid any further despair.

The game is less light-hearted now. The fun and laughter are gone as we all silently plot our next move. Nick flips the coin—another dare.

How many dares is that now?

He spins the bottle; it makes two turns and lands on me. I look at Arnie, already feigning boredom as he leans onto Heather's shoulder and pretends to fall asleep. I don't want to be responsible for slowing the pace of the game. Other than having sex with Nick in front of everyone, I can’t think of anything else I can do to make Arnie happy. I rack my brain for movies I've seen, trying to pull something from my subconscious. Unfortunately, my brain is mush at the moment. Then it comes to me. My heart sinks as soon as I realize what I’m about to say. I cover my face with my hands and grind my teeth.

I don’t want to do this. I have to. I have no choice. It’s just a game.

"Nick.” I look at Arnie when I say his name, waiting for his reaction. He raises an eyebrow at me and snickers when I hesitate. “Nick, I dare you to kiss me and Heather at the same time."

Arnie’s mouth forms an ‘o’, then he looks at Matt. They fall back into the sand, bulldozed by my dare. K even looks impressed. I finally turn to Nick. He runs his hand through his hair and smiles at the boys. His casual demeanor enrages me. His arrogant grin infuriates me. After he’s done fixing his hair, he looks at me, leans in close, and whispers, “I love you.”

My mouth falls open. He loves me. Nick Marino loves me. I don’t even have time to respond. Heather quickly appears at Nick’s side. I won’t dare let her get the first move, not now, not with the boy who loves me. I kiss Nick on the cheek and slowly make my way to his mouth. Heather follows my lead on the other side. We time it perfectly and meet at Nick's lips. He makes a few movements with his mouth but lets us do the rest. Nick runs his hand down my back and pleasure floods my body, until I feel Heather slide her tongue across Nick’s lips. I back away in disgust, allowing her full access to his mouth. When I see his lips reach for hers, I pull Nick away. “That’s it!” I point for Heather to move back to her side of the circle and resist the urge to slap the smug look off her face. Then I take Nick's face in my hands and give him a long, deep kiss. The guys whistle and cheer me on.

"Go Dani!" I hear Arnie say.

"You lucky bastard," K adds.

I sit back down, satisfied and somewhat heartbroken.

Nick squeezes my hand and kisses my cheek. “You’re amazing, Dani.” He puts his forehead to mine and my heart melts. I feel like I haven't spoken a word to Nick all night. I need to process everything that’s happened, so I ask him to walk me to the bathroom. Arnie makes a disgusting comment about condoms and sex in the sand as we walk away. He’s such a pig.

Nick tightens his grip as we slip into the darkness. “Are you having fun?” He burrows his face through my hair and kisses the back of my neck.

“I guess.” I don’t know if this can be classified as fun. I feel good. Thizz feels good. But that’s it. There was nothing fun about that game. Not really. I kissed his best friend; did he think that was fun?

Nick stops just short of the lights in the parking lot. “Is it working?”

“Yes,” I whisper into his mouth. I ready myself for a long kiss, but he backs away. He lifts my hands to his lips and kisses my knuckles, looking at me like he’s waiting for me to say something. Oh no. It’s my turn to say it. I bury my face in his chest and mumble, “I love you too.” The sound of my voice saying I love you is so weird. It’s like the first time I heard myself speak Spanish. The words just don’t sound right coming from me.

“I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I never knew I could.” Nick lifts my chin and forces me to look at him. “I love you,” he says again in plain, beautiful English.

Nick Marino loves me. And I love him. I think.

"You really aren’t mad at me for kissing Matt?" I know he gave his permission, but it could have been the peer pressure of the group.

"No, no way," he assures me. “I know Matt would never do me wrong. I trust him with my life. You are part of my life.” He kisses me softly on the lips, then pulls away too soon. "Why don't you ask if I'm mad you kissed Heather?” Nick raises his eyebrow in that sexy way he does. This time it has no effect on me.

I swallow hard and feel the hot, acidy tang of bile rise in my throat. “The last thing you felt when I kissed Heather was anger,” I say and wiggle myself out of his arms. Nick refuses to let me go.

"Would you be mad if I kissed Heather?" Nick squeezes me to him as if he’s trying to comfort me, but every word out of his mouth cuts me like a razor.

I try to block the mental picture, but it flies at me in 3D. Even hearing the words makes me want to puke. “You did kiss her.” My stomach knots at the memory. That’s a visual I’ll have for the rest of my life. Thanks, thizz.

“No, I mean, you know, like you kissed Matt.”

Someone has just stabbed me in the chest. I place my hand over my heart and check for blood. "Uh, yeah." I back away in case I actually throw up.

"Why? It's just a game.”

I can’t tell if he is serious. My eyes dance wildly, making it impossible to focus on his face. "Because, it's different. You know I don't like Matt.” My tone is surprisingly firm. I even believe the words I’m saying.

"And you know I don't like Heather."

Ok, now he’s twisting the knife into my heart. I don’t understand why he is forcing the issue or why he feels the need to lead our conversation in this direction. He wouldn’t be doing this, unless…oh God. He wouldn’t push for this, unless he wants to kiss her. He reaches for my hand and I jerk it away. Does he think I owe him now because I kissed Matt? A kiss for a kiss? Something that feels like reality is starting to creep in. I really wish I had another pill. I wonder if Nick has more. I wonder if he’d give me one if I asked.

"Why do you think I would do anything to hurt you? I've never felt this way about anyone before you.” His words sound sincere, yet what he’s asking contradicts the sentiment. “Don’t you trust me?”

My anguish turns to anger in a matter of seconds. I know Nick’s views on trust. He explained them to me a few days ago when I saw a voluptuous Greek goddess get out of his car. He caught me staring from the doorway of the café and rushed inside to explain, while the girl headed off in the direction of Lady Luxe. He said jealousy is for the weak, and I have nothing to worry about because he was just giving a ride to an old friend. There really wasn’t much I could say. He was right. Jealousy is for the weak. And I am weak.

“I'm sorry. It's not you, it’s her.” I decide to focus my distrust on Heather, not Nick. That way he can’t defend against my rage.

"She's your friend."

"She is not my friend.” I break away from Nick and stomp towards the fire. How can he say she’s my friend? Doesn’t he know me at all?

I hear the sand sloshing behind me and I speed up. “Dani, stop.” He grabs my hand and spins me around. “These are the only lips I want to kiss.” He runs his thumb across my mouth. “Forever.”

“Why?” I spit back.

“Why what?”

“Why me? What makes me so special?” I choke on the words. I’m getting emotional; it’s so unlike me.

Nick must see the tears glistening in my eyes, because his reaction is unexpected. He rests his head on my shoulder then stands upright and wraps his arms around my neck, crushing my head to his chest. “I don’t know. I just do.” His voice cracks slightly. “When I look at you, something happens to me. Something new and amazing and scary as shit. I can’t decide if I want to kiss you or run away.” This is the most honest thing he has ever said to me.

“Thanks a lot,” I joke. I don’t do well with this level of intimacy, so I turn to laughter.

“It’s not like that. I should run because I’m not good for you.”

I snort in reply. “If anyone is unworthy in this relationship, it’s me. I don’t deserve you. Look at me.”

Nick steps back with a serious look on his face. “Don’t say that. Don’t put yourself down, ever.” I start to defend myself, but Nick won’t let me. “There isn’t anything about you I would change.” He cups my face in his hands and rubs his thumbs down my cheeks and then across my lips. His eyes fill with desire as he leans towards me. I close my eyes, and half a second later his tongue slides into my mouth. Even though this is one of the most tender kisses we have ever shared, my mind wanders to another kiss. Matt’s hand on my face, his mouth on mine, the heat of his body as we kneeled in front of each other. The intensity is unrivaled, even now as Nick holds me in his arms. I grab Nick’s head and pull him closer, deeper into my mouth. He grips my hips and pushes against me. “I want you so bad, Dani,” he breathes into my mouth. “Do you want to go to my car?”

Yes! I scream in my head. I want him right now. My body needs something. Maybe I don’t need another pill. Maybe I just need Nick. We hear a yelp from the fire and turn to look. Arnie has Heather over his shoulder. I scan the faces around the fire and see Matt. I snap back to my senses. I can’t do this; no matter how badly my body is screaming yes.

“I don’t want to be the girl who loses her virginity in the back of a Chevy.”

Nick looks like he’s just been socked in the stomach, and my face turns ten shades of red.

“You’re a virgin?” he chokes a little on the last word.

I’m so humiliated. Not because I am a virgin; it’s the fact that Nick thinks I’m not. Three weeks ago he thought I didn’t drink alcohol, so why is finding out I’ve never had sex such a shock? I don’t know what to feel, but lots of feels wash over me, thanks to thizz, and sadness is the one that sticks. I put my face in my hands and try not to cry.

“It’s ok, Dani.” Nick pulls my hands away from my face. “I’m just surprised. Well, not really. I guess I’m…happy.” Nick kisses my forehead like I’m a fragile piece of glass. “You’re right, this is not the time or place.” Nick looks as if he’s just been given the key to a bank vault. He’s giddy over the fact that I’m a virgin, which only makes me feel more like a freak.

Nick suggests we head back to the group since he knows he’s not getting laid. He wraps his arm around my shoulders, and I feel a vibration in his pocket. His phone is always ringing, and he always answers it. Nick is more involved in his family’s business than I thought. It makes me wonder, if we had gone to his car, would he still have answered it? The sad thing is, I know he would have. He always does.