Текст книги "Into the Deep"

Автор книги: Samantha Young

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 7 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

What is your problem? I’m not your girlfriend! Your girlfriend is standing right next to you. I’m the girl you dumped, remember?

“No, Dad, I don’t,” I answered, my drunken, loose lips about to get insulting when arms came around my waist and pulled me back into a strong chest. Aaron.

“I need to steal Supergirl away for a bit,” he told the group, laughter in his voice. “She needs to rescue me from a dire, dire situation …”

I laughed and let him drag me away, hoping it annoyed the fuck out of Jake. Uneasiness settled over me almost immediately, though, when Aaron led me down the hall to bedroom number one.

I tugged on his hand and he looked over his shoulder. “What?”

“I’m not going in there with you.” I shook my head and tried to pull my hand out of his, but Aaron held tight.

“Come on, Charley. Loosen up a little with me.”

Annoyed at his persistence and annoyed at myself for giving him the wrong impression, I yanked my hand back. “I’m not sleeping with you.”

Aaron’s handsome face darkened. “Are you kidding me? I’ve wasted all night on you. I thought it was clear that this was just going to be a fuck.”

My ears were ringing with his brutal honesty, so I didn’t reply.

He sighed heavily and brushed past me, leaving me standing there feeling stupid and worthless. In the morning I’d be pissed that I let him make me feel that way, but right then, I was too drunk to push my gloomy feelings away.

Back in the main room Beck was making out with some random girl and Denver, Rowena, Jake, and Melissa weren’t anywhere to be seen.

Lowe and Matt were chatting and drinking at the kitchen island.

Lowe gave me his sexy, flirty grin as I approached. “Babe, you’re killing me in that outfit. You should wear skirts more often. You’ve got great legs.”

I drunkenly cuddled into his side, leaning my head on his shoulder. “Thanks,” I murmured.

His arm came around me, hugging me. “You okay?”

Hearing the concern in his voice, I pressed even tighter against him, trying to bury myself into the comfort he was giving me by just being him. “Fine. Where did everyone go?”

It was Matt who answered, appearing a little awkward. “After you left with that a-hole English guy, Jake got a little moody. Mel noticed. They got into an argument and left. Den and Row got bored, so they left too.”

I was put more than a little off-balance by Matt’s not-so-subtle insinuation that I’d caused some kind of rift between Melissa and Jake. However, it wasn’t just the insinuation. It was the thought that Jake was pissed at me for being with another guy. What the hell did that mean? What was he trying to do to me?

Lowe’s arm tightened around me. “Don’t worry about it, babe.” He sighed. “This party is terrible and I’m exhausted. You want us to walk you home?”

I nodded. Yes. I wanted out of there so I could pass out on my bed and forget everything about tonight. “Let me get Claud first.”

Finding my friend on the balcony with Zach and a couple of his friends, I pulled Claudia aside and told her that I wanted to leave.

“Okay, we’ll go,” she assured me.

I glowered at her. “Don’t think we won’t be talking about what happened with you.”

“Not now.” She brushed me off and called a goodnight to Zach.

Seeing us preparing to leave with Lowe and Matt, Beck abandoned the girl he was with and followed us out of the apartment. Hitting the street, I was glad I had alcohol in my blood to keep me warm in the freezing cold.

“You might not feel cold, but you are,” Lowe said, pulling me into his side. He was only wearing a thin shirt. “So am I,” he grumbled and rubbed a hand over my arm.

Ahead of us Claudia walked between Beck and Matt, Matt chatting away, oblivious to the obvious tension between his companions.

“What happened with the guy?” Lowe suddenly asked.

I curled my lip at the thought of Aaron. “As soon as I made it clear he wasn’t getting any, he dropped me like a bad habit.”

“What a charmer.”

“Mmm.”

He squeezed my waist. “Will you sleep with me?”

I smiled at his teasing question. “Not tonight.”

His laughter rocked against my side. “That wasn’t a no.”

“I’m leaving my options open.”

Lowe chuckled. “A guy wants a girl, he has to hope to God she wants him back. A girl wants a guy, all she’s got to do is say the word and bam! He’s naked. You got all the power.”

“I am Supergirl.”

He laughed again and kissed my hair. “That you are.”

“And you know … I think it’s more to do with the fact that girls need to be attracted to more than just a penis to want sex. I get the impression straight men are just attracted to the vagina.”

This only made Lowe laugh harder. “You’d be surprised.” He sighed and after a minute quietly muttered, “Jake’s a fucking moron.”

I decided it was best I didn’t ask him to confirm what he meant by that.

There was so much food inside my stomach, I was impressed I’d managed to fold myself into my mom’s car and drive myself to Jake’s. I’d just spent Thanksgiving dinner with my parents, and my mom had gone overboard, illogically compensating for the fact that my sister wasn’t with us. Well, she was kind of with us. We’d sat my laptop at the end of the table and Andie had Skyped with us from Dublin while we ate. I’d have felt sorry for her watching us scarf down Mom’s delicious turkey dinner and incredible pumpkin pie, but Andie had made her own little Thanksgiving dinner for her and a couple of her fellow Americans. Since she’d inherited Mom’s cooking gene, I could imagine it had been pretty good.

When I told my parents I was going over to see Jake, my mom was the one who protested. “Isn’t it enough that one of my daughters isn’t here for Thanksgiving?” she bemoaned. Surprisingly, it was Dad who came to my rescue.

“Let her go. They haven’t seen each other in twenty-four hours. It must be killing them,” he said, flashing me a teasing smile before returning his eyes to the game. The Eagles were playing the Cardinals, neither of which were my dad’s team, yet still he watched.

Somehow in the last few weeks, Jake had weaseled his way into my dad’s good graces. Whether it was because I was happy or because Jake could charm the pants off anyone, I don’t know. All I did know was that last Sunday, I’d gone into the kitchen to get Jake a soda and when I returned, he and Dad were watching the game and I might as well have been invisible. They made disparaging comments about the Rams and reassured each other that their team (the Chicago Bears) would pull it together. In the end, the Bears whipped the Rams 27-3 and that victory seemed to cement some kind of bond between Dad and Jake. I didn’t care that it took football to do it. I was just glad it was done.

It was freezing outside, so despite the fact that my cheeks were blazing and my whole body was warm with Delia Redford’s cooking, I bundled into my winter coat and scarf and got into Mom’s car. Thankfully, it hadn’t snowed yet this month so I had clear roads to Jake’s. He lived on the other side of town in a newer development built in front of the creek, so he had beautiful views from the rooms at the back of his house. Including his bedroom. I’d been in his bedroom a couple of times, but his mom made us keep the door open while we studied. He still managed to sneak in quick make-out sessions, but the heavy make-out sessions were reserved for the inside of Hendrix. We couldn’t use the truck bed because of the weather, but I’d already begun fantasizing about next summer and the possibilities to be had.

“Charley, so good to see you, sweetie,” Mrs. Caplin greeted me at the door. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

I hugged her tight. “Happy Thanksgiving, Mrs. C.”

She led me into their large sitting room and I met Jake’s eyes as soon as I entered. He smiled at me and lazily got up off the couch, sauntering over to me for a hug.

“Don’t squeeze me too tight. I’m full,” I mumbled against his chest, clutching onto his back.

Jake chuckled and turned me in his arms so he wasn’t blocking me from everyone. I said hi to Lukas and Mr. Caplin, and waited for Jake to introduce me to the older woman who I knew was his nana—he’d told me she was visiting. She was sitting on the arm of Mr. C.’s chair, her long, gray hair pulled back on each side with glittery slides. She wore a long gypsy skirt and a warm, knitted pink sweater.

“Charley, this is Nana. Nana, this is Charley.”

She raised her eyebrows at him. “How many girls you got, boy?”

I tensed against his side and Jake squeezed my arm. “Cut it, Nana.”

“No,” I pulled out from under his arm, crossing mine over my chest. “How many girls you got, Jake?” I tilted my head in question, half teasing, half concerned.

Mrs. C. rubbed my shoulder. “Jake’s nana is just teasing. Amanda Reyes dropped by this morning with a pumpkin pie and was a bit obvious about her crush on Jake. It was sweet. She blushed a lot. Poor thing. She must be the only one in town who doesn’t know my boy is head over heels for you.”

Although her comment made me melt into goo inside, I knew Jake’s mischievous nana was waiting for a reaction. She instantly reminded me of Lukas. Now I knew where he got his cheeky devilishness from. Projecting nonchalance, I nodded and turned back to the room. “Her pie any good?”

Jake’s nana chuckled, her eyes bright on me. “Good answer.”

“If you’re done causing trouble, Charley and I are going to hang out upstairs.”

“You’re not watching the game?” I didn’t want to interrupt him when it was obvious that’s what he’d been doing before my arrival.

“Not my team.” He shook his head, gently pushing me out of the sitting room.

“Keep your door open!” Mrs. C. shouted after us.

I climbed their wide staircase, feeling my remaining energy begin to dissipate under the weight of my food intake. “Are you saying if it had been your team, you wouldn’t have left to have alone time with me?”

“That’s not what I’m saying. There is such a thing as a record button, you know.”

“You’re not like other boys,” I mumbled and then face-planted on his bed. “I ate too much,” I said, my mouth pressed against his pillow. It sounded more like, “M mm mm mmuh.”

I heard his deep chuckle behind me and then the bed depressed as he sat on it. “Let’s get your coat off before you pass out.”

Reluctantly, I sat up and let Jake unwind my scarf and slip off my coat. The whole time I stared at his mouth, my eyes lidded and heavy with food exhaustion. He brushed his mouth over mine and settled us back on the bed so I was lying on my side, my back to his chest, his legs intertwined with mine. Snuggling me closer, Jake wrapped his arm around my waist and clutched my hand. “I missed you today,” he whispered against my shoulder.

I smiled sleepily. “I love you.”

I was out before I even realized I’d said it out loud.

My eyes opened to the dark. Where was I? What had happened? I shot up into a sitting position, willing my eyes to adjust to the light, and then swallowed a shriek at the feel of a warm hand on my lower back.

“Baby, it’s me,” Jake whispered. “You fell asleep.”

It came to me that I was in Jake’s bedroom. I relaxed back against the pillow as his face formed in the dark from the crack of light streaming in from the window above his bed. He put his arm around me and drew me into him.

“What happened?” I whispered against his mouth.

“Mom called your mom to let your parents know you fell asleep here.”

“And they just let you stay with me?” I asked incredulously, keeping my voice low.

Jake laughed softly. “Yeah, right. I’m supposed to be on the couch. I came back up after everyone went to bed.”

I dropped my head, nuzzling my face against his throat. A few weeks ago, I’d gone on a shopping trip with Mom to Chicago and on impulse bought Jake cologne that made my mouth water. He’d worn it every day since and every day since, I found an excuse to bury my head against his neck and inhale him.

Jake held me tighter and I felt him grow hard against my upper thigh. My breath caught and I moved my leg over his hip. He rocked gently against me, shooting delicious tingles through me. I lifted my head and met his eyes two seconds before I kissed him. The kiss turned deep and hot fast, and Jake rolled me beneath him, my inner thighs clutching his hips as he tortured me by rubbing his denim-clad erection against the denim seam between my legs.

Breathing shallow, Jake broke the kiss and cradled my head in his hands as if I was a piece of something incredibly fragile. The light moved over his face and I caught my breath at the way he was looking at me. “What my mom said earlier … about me being head over heels for you …”

“Yes?”

“I love you too, Charley. I’ve been in love with you since our first date, and every day since I’ve fallen deeper and deeper for you.”

For a moment I was so busy floating on a cloud of pure euphoria that it took me a minute to realize he’d said “I love you too.” I gasped, remembering my mumble before I fell asleep. “I said it out loud, didn’t I?”

He nodded. “It would be nice if you said it again, though.”

Even though I was lying down, I felt a little dizzy with adrenaline as I gazed up into Jake’s soft, warm eyes. His confession that he loved me like I loved him made me feel right in a way I didn’t know how to describe. I was only sixteen, so I hadn’t been looking for it, but now that I had it, I realized it was something I guessed we all looked for our whole lives. We all are looking for a place in life, somewhere we fit. It’s not a place that changes who we are or what we do—perhaps it shapes us, makes us better, makes us more—but mostly it shelters us with a sense of peace, a sense that whatever we do, whoever we are, we’re not alone in it.

I was lucky enough to find that place when I was sixteen years old. It was carved deep in Jake. And that scared the hell out of me.

“I’m scared, Jake,” I whispered honestly. “We’re so young. There are a lot of years ahead of us to lose this.”

“Don’t think like that,” he replied, his tone hard and implacable. “We’re never going to lose this, Charley. I promise. Now tell me you love me.”

I sucked in a deep breath. “I love you, Jacob Caplin.”

He grinned and kissed me hard, his hand coasting down to the waistband of my jeans. “Can you be quiet?” he murmured against my lips.

I smiled at his cockiness. “I’m sure you’ll find a way to muffle my cries of ecstasy, Sex God.”

He laughed into my mouth and it felt beautiful. When he lifted his head, Jake looked happier than I’d ever seen him. “Don’t ever stop being a smart-ass. It’s one of my favorite things about you.”

“I’m not a smart-ass.” It was my immediate response to such claims. “But if I were, I’m glad you like that about me.”

“I love everything about you.”

“Even my freakishly long big toe?”

Jake shook against me, dropping his head to my shoulder. “Even that,” he whispered, laughter in his voice. “I’m trying to get lucky here.”

Since we hadn’t had sex yet, I found myself wondering if he meant going all the way, and as much as I was ready to go all the way with Jake, I didn’t want to go all the way with his parents in the next bedroom. “Lucky lucky? Or lucky-to-a-certain-point lucky?”

I felt his teeth on my earlobe and shivered. “Not sex. Just all the good stuff we’ve done before.”

At the mere suggestion, I felt my body grow ready for him. I felt another smart-ass comment take the stairs down from my brain toward my mouth, but I tripped it up before it could ruin the moment. Instead I turned my head to find Jake’s mouth. “I won’t ever stop loving you,” I promised him.

“Good,” Jake replied, and upon hearing how hoarse his voice was with emotion, I felt tears prick my eyes. “I won’t ever stop loving you. No matter what.”

Between the two of us, Claudia and I were racking up an insane amount of angst over boys. Boys! I wanted to be fifteen again when I didn’t give a crap about them.

The day after Halloween, I nursed a hangover and split my time among wallowing in confusion and self-pity, writing my paper, and attempting to get the truth out of Claudia.

After downing an aspirin and shoveling back the falafel wrap Claudia had gone bravely in search of, I broached the subject I should’ve broached pre-Halloween booty call.

“What is going on with you?” I asked, concerned, pulling my knees up to my chest and curling into one of the waiting room chairs in the kitchen. We were alone and the night before was fresh, albeit hazy, in my mind. It was as good a time as any to hash this out with her. “Something is bugging you.”

Claudia was lying on the hard linoleum floor, her dark hair spread out around her head, her hands flat on her stomach. Her golden complexion looked a little pale—I wasn’t the only one who had seriously overimbibed last night. She closed her eyes at my question. “It’s obvious there’s something between me and Beck, right?”

I snorted. “Um, yes.”

“It’s obvious to everyone.” One eye opened as she peeked at me. “The sexual tension is killing me.” She closed it again. “But he wants the best of both worlds. He wants the closeness of a girlfriend without committing to it. And to get his rocks off, he sleeps with other girls he’s made no such promises to.”

Seeing the strain in her features, I asked softly, “Is he hurting you?”

“Is Jake hurting you?”

I took that as a yes. “Should we stop hanging out with them?” It occurred to me that I didn’t know what I wanted her answer to be.

“I wish I could say yes … but I don’t want to stop spending time with Beck.” Claudia sighed and pushed up into a sitting position, tugging her fingers through her hair. “Last night was stupid. I was attracted to Zach, I’m not saying I wasn’t, but it was stupid. I’m pissed off about Beck and I just went for it. You know what, though?” Her expression was a little sheepish as she confessed, “Beck walking in on it made it worthwhile. It made my point. He doesn’t want me, fine. But other guys do.”

“He definitely seemed annoyed.”

“And then he started making out with some random.”

I winced. “You saw that, huh?”

Claudia rolled her eyes. “He’s such a coward. And trying to get reactions out of each other, hurting each other? That’s not good. Definitely not good. I thought last night might have pushed us in a final direction, but he texted me this morning as if everything is fine.”

“Probably because he doesn’t want to stop hanging out with you, just like you don’t want to stop hanging out with him.”

“We’re a mess.”

“So …” I shrugged like it was no big deal. “Sleeping with strangers?”

She cut me a sullen look, as if I’d judged her. “I just wanted to try it.”

“Don’t get defensive. I’m not judging. I swear. It’s just not like you.”

“I know.”

“Well? What was it like?” I was genuinely curious.

Claud wrinkled her nose. “It was good, but not great. Kind of like eating vanilla ice cream when you really only ever eat chocolate.”

I wanted to say I understood that analogy but I didn’t.

“What about Jake? Anything of note happen last night?”

I grunted and proceeded to tell her about him leaving the party in a mood over my escapades.

Now it was Claudia’s turn to look concerned. “Spending time with each other is obviously confusing you. Maybe you should stay away from one another for a while. And don’t say I should take my own advice.” She groaned again and flopped back on the floor. “We suck at this right now.”

“I don’t think it’ll be a problem for me to stay away from Jake. Unlike you, I didn’t get a text this morning and I doubt I will. Ever.” It was hard keeping my tone light, casual, when the very thought of not speaking to Jake again felt like an impossible and painful prospect.

Just as it had felt almost four years ago.

After saying such to Claudia, I was taken aback to find Jake waiting at the gates to our courtyard a few days later. I was heading out for the gym on our usual day and Jake always met me there. But I hadn’t expected to see him after the Halloween party.

Trying to calm my heart, I slowed to a stop in front of him. He was leaning against the wall, his hands inside the pockets of the black, double-breasted wool coat he wore over his black jeans. A soft blue scarf was tied around his neck, bracing him against the Scottish Fall. Could it have killed him to not look good … just once?

I was wrapped up warm in my own coat and scarf but I was wearing my gym clothes underneath. Jake was here … but by his attire, I could assume he wasn’t coming to the gym with me. So why was he here?

Jake lifted his gaze from the ground and once again, my body reacted to the impact of his dark eyes. I shivered and crossed my arms over my chest in a protective gesture.

“I’m sorry about the other night,” he apologized softly.

“It’s okay.” I knew we were both wondering if I meant it.

The silence between us became too thick to bear and I made a little huffing noise before telling him dryly, “I didn’t sleep with him. And he wasn’t happy about it.” Why was I explaining myself? Was I really that afraid of him being mad at me? After what’d he’d done? It occurred to me I might need therapy.

As I pondered over whether it was a bad idea to get free therapy from Andie, since she was hardly impartial over the subject, a dangerous alertness leapt into Jake’s expression. “How not happy? Did he do something to you?” he pushed off the wall, bristling with aggression.

I hurried to assure him. “No, no. He was just a jerk. But an honest one.”

“Lowe didn’t say. He just said he walked you home.”

“Yeah.”

The silence returned.

Two girls walked past, their eyes glued to Jake. As they walked up the hill away from us, they started giggling and casting smiles at him over their shoulders.

Some things never changed.

“It took me off guard,” Jake suddenly said.

I turned back to him, frowning in confusion. “What?”

“Seeing you … with him. It took me off guard. I reacted badly. I’m sorry.”

Even more confused than I’d already been, I dragged a hand over my head and down through my ponytail, trying to think what the best answer was. Something not confusing. Something that reminded us where we were now. I didn’t do it gently. “It’s been a while, Jake. You must know that there have been other guys.” Guy singular, but he didn’t need to know that. I’d already explained myself when I didn’t need to, confusing the situation even more.

If I were anyone else, I would’ve missed that little flare of anger in the back of his eyes. He hid it well and he hid it quickly. “Of course. I’m just trying to wrap my head around all of this. Sometimes it feels like only yesterday we were lying in the back of my truck, you know.”

“Well, it wasn’t.”

Jake studied me a moment and I tried my best not to squirm. Finally, he nodded. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I just came here to see if I hadn’t fucked everything up again.”

I wanted to scream at him—demand to know why he’d fucked everything up in the first place, and then stuck the knife in deeper by bringing another girl to the place we’d planned to come together. Instead, I nodded tightly. “We’re good.”

He appeared to relax a little and he gave me a small smile. “We’ll go to the gym together next time, yeah?”

My answering smile was equally small. “Sure.”

“So your mom says Jacob Caplin’s there and that you’re spending time with him.”

Silently, I cursed my mother. I should’ve known she wouldn’t be able to keep this from Dad. Thankfully, Dad and I were talking on the phone and not on Skype so he couldn’t see my murderous expression. “Mmm-hmm.”

“Don’t ‘mmm-hmm’ me. Were you ever going to tell me?”

“There’s not much to tell, Dad.”

“That boy broke your heart. I don’t want him near enough to do it again.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“I’m not convinced.”

“Dad, I don’t want to talk about this with you.”

Dad sighed, causing the line to crackle. “You were just a kid, Charlotte, and he changed you. One minute you were happier than I’d ever seen you, and the next you were closed off. I didn’t like having to watch that.”

I bowed my head, feeling at once loved and sorry that I’d done that to my family. “I’m not anymore,” I promised him softly.

“You sure about that, sweetheart? Because I don’t see any other boy hanging around. Let’s not even get started on Alex.”

“I don’t want to talk about Alex, either, Dad. There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Maybe you should come home.”

I laughed and then immediately sighed. “I’m okay. I won’t do anything stupid. Lesson learned.”

“You know you can still trust people, Charley, without it turning into another lesson. I think Jake is just this reminder that you can’t depend on people, and I don’t want my daughter feeling that way.”

“I don’t feel that way about people … I feel that way about Jake. There’s a difference.”

“Then why are you hanging around the boy?”

“Because he’s friends with my friends,” I lied.

Before my dad could say anything else, I heard Mom calling him to get his breakfast. It was Saturday, early there, and Dad had called before he had to head to work. It would’ve been nice to talk to him about something other than Jake.

“Got to go, sweetheart. You take care, all right? We’ll speak soon. Love you.”

“Me too. Bye, Dad.”

I hung up and growled at my cell. I was going to kill my mother.

Hearing masculine laughter from the kitchen, I wondered if it was Beck and decided to go in and keep him and Claud company. The two of them were very busy pretending everything was cool between them. However, Claudia confided it helped when they weren’t alone.

And yet they still spent time alone together. That completely made sense. Not.

Strolling into the kitchen, I discovered it wasn’t just Beck and Claud in there. Lowe, Jake, Gemma, and Matt were sitting around chatting.

“Hey,” I greeted as I came to a stop near Jake. We’d been to the gym together since our little chat outside at the gates. We’d also grabbed coffee and taken a stroll through Regent Gardens and into Leith, wandering around the cold city and talking about everything. Everything except us. We’d distracted ourselves from that by joking around in tourist shops trying on tartan hats with ginger hair glued inside them, and drinking Starbucks while we nibbled on sugary Scottish tablet that made our teeth ache. I’d also attempted to take a photograph of Jake standing next to a bagpiper dressed in full tartan regalia. The piper– not the same guy every time– stood on the corner of Princes Street and Waverly Station. He wasn’t there every day but he was there a lot, and I got used to his pipes playing the soundtrack to my life in Scotland. Some people didn’t like the pipes, but for me they were like this sentient being that totally got me. As soon as I neared New Town it was like those pipes sensed me and whatever mood I was in its tune would change, as if it was saying, ‘Me too’. Some days it was lively, its high pitched song in harmony with me as it said, ‘I’m feeling good today too. The air is crisp, I’m in a land full of mystery, and I feel up for an adventure’. Other days, more often of late since Jake came so thoroughly back into my life, the pipe’s song swung from reflective to almost mournful. Sometimes I’d stand on the opposite side of the street, the pedestrians and traffic quieting to a hum beneath the pipe’s story. Like Scotland itself, the melancholy tune was quiet, dignified, braving life and keeping the secret of its pain buried. Its haunting wail never failed to cause the hair on the back of my neck to rise. Twice now Jake had come upon me just standing there listening to it. Twice now he’d just looked at me as if he knew exactly what I was thinking but was afraid to bring it up—an action (or inaction rather) that was becoming common between us.

After the guys greeted me, Jake suddenly reached up, grabbed my hand, and jerked me down onto the arm of his chair in an unconsciously familiar move. When I looked at him, he just gave me a small smile and turned back to listen to what Beck was saying.

I, on the other hand, searched the room to see if anyone’s expression resembled mine. My eyes immediately locked on Lowe, his eyebrow raised in my direction.

Shrugging at his silent question, I watched on bemused as he smiled and took a sip of his soda. While I stewed over Jake’s behavior, Lowe returned his focus to Beck and Claudia.

Glancing down at Jake, I tried to ignore the squeeze in my belly as I watched him smile at whatever Beck was saying. He had enviously thick eyelashes and a beautiful mouth. A perfect mouth. I’d spent hours when we were together nibbling on his lower lip, which was classically fuller than his top.

Sensing my study, Jake looked up at me and I covered my longing with feigned casualness. “Where are Melissa, Den, and Row?”

“Mel’s with some friends and Den and Row are still sleeping.”

I nodded, relaxing more now that I realized Melissa wasn’t going to be appearing out of the bathroom and asking me why on earth I was perched on the arm of her boyfriend’s chair. “What have you all been talking about?”

Claudia whirled around, her long hair whipping Beck in the chest. He barely flinched, silently telling us he was used to it. I knew I was. She once almost took out my eye with her hair whip.

“We’re talking about Thanksgiving. Since none of us are going home for it, I thought we could bring it to us. I’ve offered to do the cooking.”

I didn’t argue with that. Although Claudia only cooked when she could be bothered, she was actually pretty good at it. “Sounds great.”

“Why am I turned on at the thought of Claud and Char cooking for us?” Matt asked, seeming genuinely bemused by his predicament.

“Because you’re a horny dick and you need to get laid,” Lowe grunted at him.

“You can remove Charley from that fantasy,” Jake added, laughter in his words. “She can’t cook for shit.”

His behavior minutes ago, plus the conversation I’d just had with my dad, made me suddenly irritated by Jake’s overfamiliarity. “Maybe I can cook now,” I scowled down at him.

He raised both eyebrows. “Can you?”

“No,” I huffed, “but it’s been almost four years, Jake.”

He was scowling back at me now. “Point being?”

“Stop acting like you know me.”

The muscle in his jaw ticked. “A little hard to do … because I do know you.”

Thus commenced a death stare match.

We glared into one another’s eyes, neither refusing to give in, and then suddenly, memories of arguments ending in kisses flared behind my eyes.