Текст книги "Into the Deep"

Автор книги: Samantha Young

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 3 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

“Charley!”

My stomach did that weird flippy thing at the sound of Jake’s voice nearing me, but I didn’t slow down. I turned my head a little, hearing his footsteps pound against the running track as he raced after me. He caught up and I gave him a small smile as he turned in front of me and started running backward. Luckily, I wasn’t running very fast, or he might’ve found himself on his ass. “Hey, Jake.”

He rolled his eyes. “‘Hey, Jake’, she says casually as if I haven’t just embarrassed myself chasing after her.”

And he wasn’t just talking about running down the school track after me. The last three weeks Jake had been paying me so much attention, the entire school was talking about it. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if the entire town was talking, as my mom had even mentioned it at dinner the other night. So far Jake had asked me out twice—I’d said no the first time (considering it was only two days after the party) and maybe last time. It was last week and we’d spent enough time around each other for me to know that my hormone-riddled teenage body didn’t just want him. All of me did.

“Do you care what anyone else thinks?” I slid him a sly smile knowing he did not. Since he’d started pursuing me, I’d heard that he’d been catching a lot of crap from Brett and his goons. I was glad to hear that Alex had nothing to do with it. Still, it was irritating. It hadn’t seemed to have put Jake off, though. I got the impression Jake wasn’t the kind of guy who backed down from anyone.

Jake’s lips twitched. “You’re killing me right now. That smirk, the hair, the sweat, those shorts …”

“The sweat?” I wrinkled my nose, suddenly feeling very unattractive.

He shrugged, a devilish gleam in his eyes. “Sweat makes me think of the things we could do together to get sweaty. Good and sweaty.”

I flushed. “You’re terrible.”

“I’m awesome,” he corrected me, repeating my words from the first night we’d met. Suddenly he stopped, his arm reaching out to catch me as I passed. I found myself being swung around and held tight against him, a surprised gasp escaping my lips as my hands fluttered against his chest.

My skin flushed hotter than it already was from running as I tilted my head back to stare up into his face. “What are you doing?”

His arm tightened around me. “It’s been three weeks since we met and I still haven’t gotten you alone. I’m not cool with that. Life is too damn short. So, Charlotte Julianne Redford, will you go out on a date with me already?”

I fidgeted as I tried to catch my breath. My hand slid across his chest as I did, coming to a rest just above his heart. To my surprise, I felt it pounding against my palm as hard as mine was. I looked up into his eyes. “Why?” I didn’t know if I was asking about his racing heartbeat or why he’d chosen me to relentlessly pursue.

Jake’s other arm came around my waist and he pressed me even deeper into him so my arms had to slide up around his neck. He bent his head, his eyes flaring as my breasts brushed his chest. Our mouths rested close to one another as he answered softly, “My mom came down on me last year for moving too fast with girls, breaking hearts, for not taking girls seriously. I told her I never made any promises and she told me it was about time I did. My dad heard and told her to lay off, that I was young, but that one day I’d meet a girl who would knock me flat on my ass.” He grinned, his nose brushing mine. “Well, he was right, and it happened sooner than I thought it would. You’ve knocked me on my ass, Charley. I think it might have something to do with the fact that you make me laugh a lot and you’re really smart. And really hot. Really, really hot,” he murmured against my mouth. “All I know is that you probably deserve better than me, but I’m too selfish to let you. I’m into you, and I want you to be so into me, you don’t even care that I’m not good enough for you.”

I teased my lip with my teeth, his confession firing up my blood and spreading this beautiful ache across my chest and into my stomach. “If this is a line, I’ll kick you in the nuts, Jacob Caplin.”

He made a face. “It’s not a line. I don’t need a line.”

“You are so unbelievably arrogant.”

“I know.” He chuckled and smoothed a hand up my spine. I shivered as it caressed my back and then slipped under my ponytail. His hand cupped my nape and gripped me gently, tipping my head back so I was looking him directly in the eye. “I need you to keep me on my ass so my ego doesn’t become a major problem. Please, Charley … go out with me.”

Teasing him, I didn’t say anything for at least ten seconds, which felt like an awful long time. I felt his fingers flex with tension and slowly I smiled. As I did, he relaxed against me and I nodded. “Yeah, okay. I’ll go out with you.”

“You did not drive a pickup in Chicago.” I smiled widely as Jake led me by the hand to his truck.

He’d been the perfect gentleman, coming to the house to meet my mom and dad before taking me out on a date. My mom thought he was fantastic, I could tell, but my dad was wary. He’d heard the stories about Jake and wasn’t too keen on Casanova taking his daughter out on a date.

Jake smiled back at me as he pulled open the passenger door of the Ford. “It was a bribe from my dad. I’ve always wanted one, don’t ask me why.” He shrugged. “It eased the pain of moving to bumble-fuck Indiana.”

I got in, huffing at the insult to my town. “So you’re telling me I’m going out with a spoiled brat.”

He laughed and shut the door. When he got into the driver’s side, he smirked. “Just so you know, I’ve worked every summer but this one as a car valet for my uncle. I saved it all and put it toward this. My dad didn’t want me to sell my car for the pickup, but he eased up on me as a bribe to keep me sweet on the move.” His smiled turned cocky. “If I’d known you were waiting for me, I wouldn’t have needed the bribe to keep me sweet.”

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, Mr. Smooth, so you’re not spoiled, but try to refrain from insulting my town.”

He tried to swallow his smile and failed. “You got it. My sincerest apology.”

We were quiet as we drove out of my neighborhood and toward Main Street. When we passed the high school and turned onto the road that would lead us out to the highway, I shot Jake a curious look. “Where are we going?”

He didn’t answer. Instead he turned off onto Brenton Fields and pulled the truck to a stop in the middle of the open. There was nothing around us but grass, trees in the distance, and a starry sky above. Jake grinned at me again and got out of the truck, leaving his MP3 player playing through the radio, the truck’s headlights on. He helped me out and holding my hand led me to the truck’s rear. I stood, my belly still fluttering with girlish excitement as I watched Jake spread out a blanket on the truck bed and pull a cooler out of the corner. He took out some sandwiches, cookies, chips, and two bottles of water.

“Dinner awaits.” He held out his hand. I laughed as he pulled me onto the bed.

I was glad I’d brought a sweater. We were nearing October and the temperature drop was more noticeable at night.

Still laughing, I bit into my peanut butter sandwich.

Jake smirked at me. “What?”

“Nothing,” I giggled now, which made him grin even harder. “I just think you might’ve watched too many movies set in small-town America in the fifties. We don’t really do the date in the back of a pickup thing. We usually hang out in each other’s rooms surrounded by modern technology.”

He clamped a hand over his chest as if I’d shot him. “I’m crushed. And here I thought this shit was romantic.”

I laughed harder. “This shit is romantic.” I stifled my giggling and gave him a genuine smile. “Thank you.”

Jake nodded in return and settled back against the truck. “You know, you’re not like other girls our age.”

I quirked an eyebrow in interest. “I’m not?”

“Nope. I find it incredibly hot how cool you are.”

“I think that’s what they call a paradox, my friend.”

“I mean … you’re not into drama or gossip or mindless, stupid stuff that doesn’t matter. I watch you with your friends and if one of them starts drama for no reason, you walk away or ignore it while the rest of them fan the flames. When they gossip about someone, you roll your eyes, and if it’s mean gossip, you tell them to grow up. Not a lot of sixteen-year-old girls have the balls to do that. Not a lot of fourteen-year-old girls have the balls to throw themselves in front of an SUV to save their sister, either.”

I groaned. “Oh God, don’t buy into that, Jake. Anyone else would’ve done the same.”

“No.” My eyes sharpened on him at the gravity in his voice. “No, they wouldn’t.”

I squirmed a little under his intense regard. “Jake …” I sighed, lowering my sandwich and staring at anything but him, “for all my cracks about being awesome … I don’t want you to build this idea of me in your head … an idea that I can’t live up to. I’m just Charley. An ordinary girl from Lanton, Indiana.”

“I don’t agree with you.”

My chest felt too full, my whole body tense with whatever heaviness was settling around our picnic on his truck bed. We’d only been on our date for twenty minutes, for goodness’ sake, and already we were in Seriousville.

“Charley, look at me.”

I did as he asked and found the breath leaving my body again at the look in his eyes.

“This shouldn’t be possible,” he whispered, “but somehow, it’s happening. You’re something special to me, and I can only hope that I’m something special to you.”

“I barely know you,” My brain murmured logic; my heart screamed its opposite.

Jake shook his head slowly. “I don’t know if that’s true.”

We were silent a while, eating our sandwiches and listening to the radio.

Finally, not able to contain it, though I knew it was insane, I whispered, “You’re something special to me.”

Jake turned his head, his eyes glittering in the dark. “Yeah?”

I ducked my head, embarrassed. “We haven’t even kissed yet.”

“It’s going to be epic.”

“What if it’s not?”

Jake threw his head back and laughed. “Are you this pessimistic about everything?”

“No. I’m just asking a question.”

“Trust me. It’ll be epic.”

I took a drink of water, eyeing him carefully. I swallowed and wiped my lips dry. “This overconfidence of yours could definitely become a problem.”

“It’s not a problem. You love it.”

“No, I love cheese fries, chocolate milkshakes, The Killers, Metric, Lucky jeans, my mom and dad and Andrea.”

Jake chuckled. “In that order?”

I narrowed my eyes playfully. “Maybe. What do you love?”

“Gio’s Pizza: the best pizza in Chicago, Reese’s peanut butter cups, the White Sox, Pearl Jam, Silversun Pickups, Bob Dylan, The Smiths, my pickup, my mom and dad and maybe Luke too.”

I nodded and then asked casually, “Have you named your pickup yet?”

“Nah, but I was thinking The Vedder.”

My eyebrows puckered together in confusion. “Why?”

Jake flinched like I’d shot him. “After Eddie Vedder. Lead singer of Pearl Jam?”

I shrugged. “Sorry. I’ve never listened to their stuff.”

Yup, this time my words had shot him. Jake shook his head. “No, no, no. Okay, no. I’m not dating a girl who has not listened to Pearl Jam. You can borrow my CDs.”

I laughed. “It’s cool. If you feel that strongly about it, I’ll download their albums.”

“Uh, one, there are a lot, and two, it’s Pearl Jam. You have to listen to them on CD.”

I tried not to laugh again, my lips twitching with the urge. “Okay.”

“Never listened to Pearl Jam,” he muttered, incredulous.

Choking on laughter, I replied, “It’s not a punishable crime.”

“That’s a shame. I could find a very creative way to punish you.”

I blushed and threw a napkin at him. “You have a filthy mind, Mr. Caplin.”

He grunted. “Of course I do. I’m sixteen years old.” He pushed the picnic up the blanket and I watched warily, wondering where he was going with this. In the end all he did was stretch out on his back, arms behind his head as he gave me an inviting smile. Casually, I lay down beside him, feeling the heat of his body as if it were pressed against mine. I’d left space between us so he wouldn’t get any funny ideas.

While we stared up at the stars, it occurred to me that we were lying there in this perfectly comfortable silence I’d never felt with anyone before.

“Just call it ‘Eddie.’”

Jake snorted. “What?”

“‘The Vedder’ doesn’t trip off the tongue. Eddie’s simpler.”

“You want me to call my pickup ‘Eddie’?”

“It’s just a suggestion.”

“He’s not the dog from Frasier. He’s a pickup.”

“Call him ‘Ford’ then.”

“He’s not a businessman with a stick up his ass.”

Now it was my turn to snort. “Zorro?”

“I get the feeling you’re not taking this seriously.”

“No, I am. Naming a truck is very important. I was going for masculine. Powerful.”

“And you came up with Zorro?”

“The Hulk? Batman? The Batmobile?”

“I’m not even humoring you on those.”

“Alan? Bob?”

“You’re so lucky you’re cute.”

“Ozzy? Lennon? Morrison? Joplin?”

“Charley …”

“Hendrix.”

Jake stilled next to me and I felt his gaze on my face as he turned to stare at me. “I like that,” he murmured softly.

I turned my head to meet his eyes and smiled. “Hendrix?”

“Yeah, it’s cool.”

I smoothed a hand down the bed of the truck and announced into the night, “I hereby christen thee Hendrix.”

Suddenly my hand was caught in Jake’s and my eyes drifted back up to his as he rubbed his thumb across my knuckles. “You named my truck,” he murmured.

“You can un-name it,” I muttered back unsurely.

Jake shook his head. “We’re in too deep for that, baby.”

My hand tightened in his and he felt it. His fingers flexed and he threaded them through mine. “I’m not too sure about the deep. I breathe better in the shallow.”

“Not true,” he whispered. “You hate the shallow.”

I finally let go of the breath I was holding and turned my head to gaze back up at the starry sky. Keeping hold of my hand, Jake asked me what my favorite color was.

“Green.”

“Me too,” he replied quietly. “But I like black too.”

“Is black a color?”

“As opposed to a shade?”

“Yeah.”

“Does it matter?”

“I guess not.”

“What’s your favorite song?”

And so began three hours of questioning back and forth. By the end of the date, I think Jake Caplin knew more about me than I even knew about myself.

As Hendrix pulled up to my house, the murmurings of butterflies in my stomach turned into a full-blown riot. This was it. This was the kissing part.

But Jake didn’t lean in for a kiss. Instead he moved around the truck to help me out. He took my hand and I followed him up to my porch. Quieted by my anticipation, I let Jake turn me and clasp me by the nape of the neck again. He pulled me in close and ducked his head to hold my gaze. “You’re going out with me next Friday.”

I blinked, coming out of my anticipatory fog. “You’re not even asking now?”

Jake shook his head solemnly. “I can’t take the chance you’ll say no.”

Okay, he had to stop with the perfect words before I melted into goo. I smiled up at him, my hazel eyes full of flirt. “Ask me.”

Jake took a deep breath and gave my nape a squeeze. “Charley … will you go out with me next Friday?”

I shrugged casually. “Sure, why not.”

Chuckling, Jake drew me close and pressed a sweet kiss to my forehead. When he pulled back, he winked and let me go. “See you at school on Monday.”

I nodded, standing there in a state of bewilderment as he walked away, got in Hendrix, and drove off. Without kissing me.

Huh.

Confused, I turned on my heel and walked inside. Mom and Dad were sitting in the living room pretending to watch television, covering up the fact that they’d definitely been spying on us.

“How’d it go?” Dad asked, his voice tight, as if he really didn’t want to know but needed to.

“You’ll be glad to know that Jake was the perfect gentleman.” Did I sound glum when I said that?

“Good,” Dad grunted.

“Are you going out again?” Mom asked.

I nodded. “He asked me out next Friday.”

“Oh, Christ,” Dad muttered.

Mom laughed. I rolled my eyes and headed into the kitchen for a glass of orange juice, my heart still pounding from the adrenaline Jake’s presence had released inside me. It almost cracked a rib when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

My face split into a huge goofy grin at the message.

I’m going to kiss you when you least expect it. And it WILL be epic.

Butterflies back in full force, I quickly texted him back. I trust you.

Slowly, I glanced over my shoulder. Seeing the anguish on Jake’s face, I turned to him despite myself. “What do you want, Jake?” I asked.

He took the steps down to me, his long legs eating them up quicker than mine had. Before I knew it, he was right there in front of me again and I was right back where I’d been last night when he approached me. I clenched my jaw to stop myself from saying something awful. He didn’t deserve awful but I wasn’t sure he deserved forgiveness, either. I was too confused. Part of me still felt for Jake and all he’d been through, and the other part hated him for breaking all the promises he’d made me.

From the moment we’d met, he’d dragged me into the deep, swearing to me he was in there with me. It was a lie. He’d waded back out to the shallows and left me to drown. Worse, he’d found a new deep elsewhere with some other girl.

Jake cleared his throat, bringing me back to the present. “I have a lot of things I need to say, Charley. I know you don’t owe me anything …” his eyes darkened to black, “but you need to hear this. After last night, I know you need to hear this.”

“I don’t need anything from you. I grew up. I’m over it.”

“I know, but clearly you still haven’t forgiven me. Last night proved that.”

“It was shock. I was enjoying myself and then suddenly, you were there.”

Jake winced. “Okay. Well, I’m not asking you to get over that shock. I’m just asking for a coffee so we can sit and talk.”

Remembering how relentless Jake could be when he wanted something, I gave him a sharp nod. “Tomorrow. The Library Bar. Twelve o’clock. I’ll give you five minutes.” I whirled around to walk away from him, but his voice stopped me again.

“You don’t have to run away because of me. Come back inside, finish your drink.”

I inwardly cursed at his audacity and looked back at him over my shoulder. “I’m not running away because of you. I finished my drink so I left. But I can see you’re still an arrogant asshole.” I moved off with long strides, desperate to get away from him.

“I’ll take that as a good sign!” he shouted across the square.

I lifted my fist in the air and shot my middle finger up at him.

“That too!”

I grunted and sped up. The last thing I needed was Jake to be Jake.

I thought Claudia would say I was crazy for agreeing to meet Jake, but instead she thought it was a good idea for me to clear the air with him. I didn’t know if that was because she liked hanging out with Beck and didn’t want to stop, or because she’d decided maybe she liked Jake a little after spending time with him at Teviot. She’d texted me when she realized I’d left, but I told her to stay. After Beck dropped her back at the apartment, she informed me, a little tipsy, that Jake and Melissa had joined the band for drinks.

Apparently, Melissa had been quiet for most of the night and Jake appeared to spend half his time reassuring her. His ex-girlfriend showing up in Edinburgh probably had put a little kink in their romantic study abroad, but I couldn’t give a shit.

Not true, actually. Part of me really did feel for Melissa. In fact, part of me wanted to run straight to her to warn her to get the hell out of there before Jake Caplin ripped her heart out.

Claudia didn’t see Jake the Heartbreaker, however. She cautiously told me that Jake was charming and friendly and acted like everything was cool. The only moment of tension at the table came when Lowe asked about me. Claudia had said I was tired and Lowe had responded by telling her to ask me to wear my Pearl Jam T-shirt next time I came out with them.

“This will be good,” Claudia said confidently as she walked me to the door. “Clear the air before classes start so you can focus on enjoying your time here.”

I wished I was as confident as she was. Instead I walked into Teviot with my chest vibrating and my stomach churning. I didn’t want to dress up for him because I thought that would be pretty obvious, but I also stupidly wanted to look hot enough to annoy him. I wore my best black skinny jeans, short black ankle boots with a little heel, and a green Harley Davidson T-shirt that was a little short in the hem and snug across the bust. I topped it with my jewelry and let my hair spill down my back in its usual waves. Jake once told me I had sex hair all day, every day, and it used to drive him nuts. My petty hope was that everything about me now would drive him nuts. If I had to suffer through my attraction to him, it would certainly help a little if he had to suffer too.

I got a couple of nods from guys as I passed and decided I’d done well today with my outfit. Yay. In the Library Bar, my eyes met the bartender first. He was cute in that I’m-deliberately-scruffy-so-you’ll-think-I-don’t-care-but-I-really-do kind of way. He wasn’t really my type, but I smiled to be polite when he gave me a nod. Turning, I found Jake sitting along the right side of the room in an open booth. He was scowling at the bartender.

Ignoring the flutter in my stomach, I walked casually toward him, but my confidence slipped a little when Jake’s eyes found me. I felt his gaze sizzle through every nerve ending as he took me in from head to foot. A muscle ticked in his jaw and he moved back against the leather booth as if suddenly restless to get out of there.

“Jake,” I greeted him flatly and slid into the opposite bench.

“Charley.” He lifted a hand to get the bartender’s attention and the guy came over to take our orders for coffee, his heated focus making things awkward. I was almost relieved when he left.

An uncomfortable silence—something Jake and I had never had to cope with before—fell between us as we waited. Finally when the coffees came, Jake took a sip and then started talking. “Your hair is much lighter. It looks good.”

Although affected by the compliment, I pretended I wasn’t and stared blankly back at him.

He switched tactics. “I know I fucked up hugely.”

I put my coffee mug back on the saucer and sighed as if I didn’t have time for this crap. “Is that why I came here, Jake? To listen to you state the obvious?”

“I’m trying here. You used to admire honesty. Have you changed?”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “I’m meaner now. A lesson I learned from you.”

Dropping his elbows on the table so he could lean closer, Jake gazed at me soulfully. “I was a dick to you. I can’t take that back. But I can apologize. I can try to explain.”

Giving him a small nod, I encouraged him to go on.

“I was lost somewhere else inside my head when it happened, Charley. I couldn’t see past that to anything or anyone. I was angry that it got that out of control and I blamed myself. You got caught up in it.”

“I never turned my back on you. I don’t understand why you blamed me.”

His brows puckered and he closed his eyes, as if in pain. “I didn’t blame you. I said things I didn’t even mean. All I wanted was to get out of there and put the whole thing behind me. By the time I looked back, it was too late. I couldn’t change what I’d done to you. I couldn’t change what I’d destroyed. I thought it was better to just let you move on. We were just kids, Charley.”

He said it like our age meant anything. He said it like others had said it to me when he left, as though because I was only sixteen, my relationship hadn’t been real—that I hadn’t fallen hard and deep. To have Jake agree with them hurt like a mother. “Move on from me? Or from there?”

“From there. From you too. You were a part of it, as much as I didn’t want you to be.”

On that, I disagreed. “Then it’s a good thing you didn’t come back, if that’s the way you still see it.”

“Charley, all I remember now about you is the good stuff. I let all that other shit go.” His eyelashes lowered over his eyes as he stared down into his coffee. “You were the best friend I ever had. I miss you. I’ve always missed you and regretted how I left it. But at the party … the way you looked at me,” his breath caught, “that was hard. I’d somehow convinced myself that you would be indifferent about …it all. You quickly dissuaded me of that.”

His heartfelt apology and admission that he’d missed me both hurt and soothed me. I relaxed a little against my seat, cradling the mug in my hands for the comforting heat it provided. “I know it wasn’t easy for you and your family, Jake. I know that’s the biggest understatement of the century …I tried, though, I tried to understand, and as much as I want to, I can’t excuse what you did to me because of what happened. That doesn’t mean your apology doesn’t help. It does. Thank you.”

Jake smiled softly and I felt that smile right in my gut. I flicked my gaze away quickly, pretending to scan the room. “I want us to be friends.”

His words brought my surprised gaze back. “What?”

He shrugged. “We’re both here for the year. We were great friends once …”

I suddenly found it a little difficult to breathe and I quickly stood, putting money on the table beside my coffee. “Look, Jake, I’m sorry I reacted that way to you at the party, and I promise that from now on, if I see you around I’ll be polite. You don’t deserve any more shit in your life. But it’s been a while. We’re different people now. Let’s just leave it at that.” Before he could reply, I walked away, waving back at the flirtatious bartender as if walking away from Jake Caplin wasn’t one of the things I hated doing most in the world.

“We’re going where?” I drew to a halt at the gates of the courtyard. It was past nine on Friday night and the Cowgate and Grassmarket were already buzzing with music and people. I was wearing my jeans and the Pearl Jam T-shirt because Claudia insisted I should—her words from a couple days ago came back to haunt me at the same time she finally told me what our plans were for the evening.

“Beck stopped by to invite us to listen to the band play their first gig. It’s this little bar just down the street.”

“Since when are you and Beck so chummy?” I asked as a delay tactic. I needed to come up with a reason not to go.

“I told you he wants to be friends and when he’s not being a manwhore, he’s pretty cool. I see no problem in hanging out with him and his band.”

“Uh … Jake’s the problem.”

“Jake’s not in the band.”

I was going to wring her neck. “I know that, Claud. But you also know he’s their friend and he’ll be there. With her.”

She grabbed my hand and gave it a sympathetic squeeze. “Babe, the best thing you can do is pretend that you’re over it. No one will think you’re faking it. You’re smart and you’re hot and they know you could get anybody. There’s no reason for them to think you’re hung up on Jake.”

“Although sweet, you’re completely biased.” I groaned in frustration. “I just don’t know if I can be around him and Melissa.”

Claudia shrugged. “Then find someone to take your mind off them. Beck told me Lowe thinks you’re smokin’ hot.”

I gestured to my shirt. “The Pearl Jam shirt. He’s going to think I’m into him.”

“Why wouldn’t you be? Lowe is cute.”

I raised my eyebrow. “He’s also a bad boy.”

“So? You’re not looking to marry the guy. You’re just looking for a distraction.”

“You know I don’t sleep around.”

“Who says you need to sleep with him?”

“You have an answer for everything, don’t you?”

My friend got serious all of a sudden, her grip turning almost painful. “I thought you were over this guy. Then we get here and he’s here too, and I realized that you are not over him. I don’t think, even when you weren’t thinking about him, you’ve ever gotten over him. I think this is the perfect opportunity for you to finally put him behind you.”

In the end, I knew she was right. I’d been holding onto the seventeen-year-old Jake I’d been in love with. He didn’t exist anymore. If I spent some time around twenty-year-old Jake who was in love with Melissa, then maybe that would finally sink in. I gave in and let Claudia lead the way.

She wasn’t wrong. The guys were playing at a bar called Milk, tucked in the corner between two sets of buildings built onto a steep slope. A narrow lane took pedestrians from the Cowgate up onto the part of the city that would lead to The Royal Mile. For the last few days, Claudia and I had been nursing hangovers from time spent with our roommates and neighbors, and we’d used the time to get better acquainted with the city that was to be ours for the next nine months. We’d wandered all over Old Town, stopping by the grave of the famous canine Grey Friars Bobby, and the nearby café The Elephant House where J.K. Rowling was said to have written some of Harry Potter in the back room that overlooked Edinburgh Castle. Claud and I had then headed toward New Town to check out the stores on Princes Street and George Street. And of course, we’d backtracked after that to Edinburgh Castle. Its lure was too great. Perched upon volcanic rock, lording over the modern city like a medieval king, Claud and I had both gotten neck pain from staring up at it as we walked down Princes Street. Fascinated, we’d wandered all the way back up to The Royal Mile and up the cobbled streets to the castle. Our legs ached from walking so much, but it surprisingly helped with the hangovers. I was thinking we’d need to slow down our partying, though. Being able to legally drink in a bar was a novelty, but I wanted to depart Scotland with a fully functioning liver.

Claudia led me into Milk and at first, we were really confused. The packed room was tiny and closed in with its dull lights, brick walls, and large bar area taking up most of the space. A leather bench ran the length of the opposing wall, tables and chairs pushed up against them.

“Are you sure this is the right place?” I asked, not able to see Jake or Beck or anyone recognizable.

Frowning, Claudia pulled out her cell and flicked through her messages. Her brow cleared and she grabbed my wrist, pulling me through the crowded bar with a polite excuse-me here and there. At the end of the room, hidden by the bar, an arched wall led into another larger room. Tables and chairs took up most of the floor and at the opposite end of the room was a small stage where Matt fiddled with a drum kit and Lowe with his guitar and amp.