Текст книги "Affliction"
Автор книги: River Savage
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Текущая страница: 12 (всего у книги 21 страниц)
“Fuck. I'll never get tired of your heat, baby,” he moans, slowing his movements.
His vocal performance was more desperate than the first time we had sex; it almost shocks me. There is nothing sexier than a man who likes to express himself and Sy expressing himself was just… “Wow,” I say after a moment of heavy breathing. He looks down at me and at my smile, and returns it with his own.
“That’s what I wanted,” he murmurs, rubbing his jaw along mine, and every time he touches me gently, I fall a little more for him.
“So this is what happens when you take things slow?” I ask after my breathing goes back to normal.
“No, that is what happens when you tease me,” he counters, nipping and kissing at my neck.
“I’ll make sure I do it more often,” I joke, tilting my head back granting him better access along my neck.
“I don’t doubt it.” He pulls back and smiles down at me. I can feel the after effects of his cock slightly pulsing while still inside of me.
“Does anyone know I’m here?” I ask, realizing what just happened and how loud we were.
“Don’t know,” he says, slowly sliding out of me.
“Well, does Kadence know I’m here?” I ask, watching him climb out of bed and walk to the bathroom to take care of the condom.
“She went home with Nix, but knows you stayed at the club.” He comes back, handing me a glass of water.
“Oh, okay,” I say, feeling relieved I won’t have to walk out and face her.
“Why? You worried what she might say?” he asks, taking the glass back from me, placing it on the side table and climbing back into bed beside me. Am I afraid of what she’ll say about Sy and me, or what she’ll say when she learns I’ve been keeping this from her?
“No,” I lie. I know what’s she going to say and I’m just not ready to hear it.
“Good, now come here,” he says, pulling me close to his naked body. “I’m not done with you.”
“What? You’re not gonna leave?” I ask, trying not to laugh at my joke, even if a small part of me is worried that now that we’ve had sex, this is what is going to happen again.
“What the fuck?” he pulls back, his eyes hardening through his stare.
“Sorry, just a joke,” I assure him, biting at my bruised lip. Oh, God, way to go. He watches the movement and I see his gaze heat up.
“What am I gonna do with you?” he asks, softening when he knows I’m playing. “Seems you’ve bewitched me with your smile, your pussy and now your humor,” he says between kisses.
“Aww, now, now. You’ve always loved my humor.”
“Only when it’s not pissing me off, Holly,” he says,
“Is there anything that doesn’t piss you off?” I ask, holding back my laughter when he narrows his eyes. “Oh, my God. You are such a cranky ass, Sy,” I tell him as I roll over and cover him with my weight. I trace the tattoos on his chest, the ink containing so many stories I can't wait to ask him about.
“You smiling at me doesn’t make me cranky,” he answers, running his fingers through my hair.
“Umm… I’m pretty sure you just fucked me hard because I was smiling,” I tease, leaning forward and kissing his lips.
“No, I was pissy ‘cause you weren’t smiling at me, not the other way around,” he sets me straight, taking my arms, and rolling me to my back, and covering me again. "Now, I’m gonna eat you out hard for reminding me how pissy you made me,” he states, and if that’s punishment for making him pissy, I’ll take it willingly.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Sy
“What are you doing here, Sunshine?” she asks through the small gap of the old chapel door. It’s Nix and Kadence’s wedding—exactly two weeks since I woke up with her in my bed and made her mine. She hasn’t accepted that fact yet, but she will soon. Preferably tonight.
“I wanted to see you,” I answer simply, forgetting why Nix sent me back here. Shit, I became distracted when I saw her standing there looking so fucking beautiful and when she called me Sunshine. She hasn’t called me that name in such a long time. I don’t know how to react.
“You look handsome,” she says quietly, looking back over her shoulder, “but you shouldn’t be here. Kadence is getting changed and then I need to fix her hair." She leans forward bringing her lips to mine in a chaste kiss.
“Can’t wait to get you out of this dress,” I admit, drinking her in.
“Go, before someone comes.” She pushes me back, but I don’t leave until I sneak one more kiss. She rolls her eyes, closing the door on me before we get caught. I’m so fucking over hiding from everyone; I’m about to shout it out for all the assholes in this chapel to hear. I walk away only to remember what Nix sent me to do. Knocking again, I wait for her to answer.
“What now?” she asks when she sees it’s me again. I narrow my eyes and she grins.
“I forgot this. Nix wanted me to give them to Kadence,” I say, pulling out a small package.
“How did you forget that?” she asks, shaking her head.
“Well, you opened the door and I was lost in your beauty,” I smoothly reply, not even giving a fuck that I sound like fucking Jesse.
“Yeah, yeah… go, before anyone sees you.” She takes the package from me and steps back.
“Wait,” I say, putting my booted foot in the way to stop the door from closing.
“Sy, we’re going to get caught,” she pleads, and I know in this moment, I’m not hiding anymore.
“Who cares?” I ask.
“Well…erm, I don’t know?” she hesitates.
“Told you I don't want to hide us, Holly,” I growl, not understanding what her issues are. We might have started off as friends, but we’ve been growing closer every moment we spend together. As far as I'm concerned, the moment she let me sink inside of her she became mine.
“Can we talk about this later?” she pleads, looking over her shoulder.
“Oh, we will be doing more than talking,” I threaten and watch as a blush spreads across her cheeks. Satisfied, I give her a wink and leave her to get the bride ready. Who knew this wedding would be so much fun. Walking back out, I nod to Nix, letting him know it’s done. He nods, and then goes back to talking to his dad, Red. Taking my seat, I wonder how long this is going to take. The thought of sitting in this fucking suit for longer than I have to makes me sweat. The last time I went to a wedding, it was mine. It was nothing the likes of this. I never thought I would get married, but then I met Katie and I was in love. And the rest, they say, is history.
“Brother.” Jesse comes to stand next to me, pulling me out of my thoughts. “I think they’re ready,” he says, nodding as Nix takes his place. The asshole looks as uncomfortable in his suit as I feel standing here.
“Do you think Kadence is still pissed about the party?” Jesse snickers, looking over at Nix and the new eyebrows he’s got coming through. We had our bachelor party last weekend. To say it ended well would be a lie. After the shit we pulled on the girls with the stripper the week before, Nix was in the doghouse. We had to find some new fun: no stripper for Kadence, no stripper for Nix. Not that it bothered me. I didn’t need to see some whore ride a pole. We just hung out at the club until Nix passed out. Jesse came up with a brilliant plan to strip him, shave him, and drive him into town and leave him. Apparently, it was something they did for hazing when the recruits came through as fire fighters. I knew it was a bad idea. I don’t think Jesse was counting on the local police who picked us up halfway through chaining him to the lamp post.
“I wouldn’t bring it up to her,” I advise, knowing just how pissed all the girls were about not only our party, but theirs. But it was Kadence’s eyes when she walked into the station the next morning to pick us up that told me she was beyond annoyed we landed Nix in overnight lockup. Nix was more worried about his balls and who had touched them, than his fuming fiancée. We were lucky; we got a break and charges weren't laid. The Rebels relationship with the police in the past has been strained, but in recent times, it’s been a hell of a lot better.
“I didn’t know the cops would be there,” he defends, but before I can reply, the music fills the chapel and everyone around us stands.
I look back, feeling a little claustrophobic in the small room, but then I see Holly step up to the threshold, and everything stops. Jesus H. Christ. Seeing her for a brief second earlier doesn't even compare to seeing her stand before everyone at the foot of the aisle.
“Fuck, Sy. You need to sort that shit out before someone tries to get in on that,” Jesse stirs me. I know he knows I’m already in, so I don’t comment. I just keep watching her.
I know today is meant to be about Kadence, but fuck, Holly looks so fucking beautiful it hurts. I can tell she’s nervous, her eyes never looking up as she passes rows of friends and family.
Six months ago, this woman would have lit up this whole chapel with her smile. Even though she never makes eye contact with me, I can’t stop looking at her. Even when Kadence comes down the aisle, my eyes never move from Holly. I’m mesmerized, watching everything she does. She captivates me. Her beautiful pain and her heartbreak draw me in. I can see she still fights a small amount of her anxiety, but after everything we’ve been through, she’s slowly coming back.
“You’re meant to be watching the bride.” Jesse nudges me, making me stumble in my spot.
“Shut the fuck up.” I elbow him back, realizing my stumble has caused people to look. Fucker. Nix and Kadence continue with their vows, too lost in each other to even care as I go back to watching Holly. Jesse’s right. I should be watching the couple we’re all here to see, but I don’t want to. I can’t keep my eyes off her as she stands before me, looking more beautiful than I’ve ever seen. Her hair is done up in some fancy-shit way that would normally bother me, but it doesn’t, because the color is almost back to the blonde that she first had when I met her. She smiles as Nix stutters on his words, and then wipes a stray tear away as she watches them kiss. And when it’s all over and done with, she finally looks over at me and gives me the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen. Finally, my sunshine has come back.
***
“We’re heading out in an hour, so be ready,” Beau says, coming back outside, letting me know we have the go ahead for tonight. He took a phone call fifteen minutes ago letting him know we are needed. We haven't had a call for a couple of weeks, and this one will be my first ride along. Tonight is a transport, stepping in and helping a young girl onto her next stop. It’s not ideal since it’s Kadence and Nix’s wedding, but when you get the call you have to go.
“What do you mean you’re heading out?” Kadence asks, coming into the conversation.
“I’ve got a pickup and I need Sy with me,” Beau answers for me. Thank fuck, too. I’m not dealing with Bridezilla. Shit has been tense since the party and I’m trying to stay in her good graces.
“What the hell is a pickup? You do know it’s our wedding night? We haven’t even had cake,” she states, folding her arms across her gown, growing angrier after each question.
“Leave them be, baby. They have shit to do.” Nix pulls her chair closer to him and rests his hand on the back of her neck.
“Nix, it’s our wedding night.”
“And I wouldn’t okay it if it wasn’t important.”
“Fine. There will be no cake for you then.” She points to the both of us. Fine by me. I don’t even like the shit. I’m more annoyed I finally have Holly relaxed and enjoying herself, and now I have to leave. Today in the chapel when she smiled over at me, I took that as her accepting not hiding us anymore.
“Change of plans. We’ve got to head now,” Beau says, looking up from his phone, pulling me out of my thoughts. He stands, signalling Nix to talk.
“Fuck, babe,” I turn to Holly, leaning over to whisper so only she can hear. “I’ll explain later, but I want you in my bed tonight.”
“Okay,” she nods. I don’t know why she decided she would stop arguing with me, but I fucking love it.
“Okay,” I repeat back to her then lean in further and lightly touch my lips to hers. She hesitates for a moment before she gives in, and softens to my kiss.
“Be back,” I promise, ignoring what’s sure to be a shocked table, hell, a shocked clubhouse. But I don’t give a fuck. It’s her smile which has all my attention.
“Hurry,” she whispers. If I don’t step away now, I’m not going to be able to leave.
“Let's go,” Beau demands, so I stand and walk out, leaving my woman in my club. Fuck, that sounds good.
“Be safe,” Nix warns, and from his tone, I already know this shit is going to cause a fucking long night, but I can't help the grin on my face knowing that my woman will be waiting for me.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Holly
“Sunshine?” I ask as I hear Sy’s bedroom door open then close.
“Yeah baby, it’s me,” he replies, coming forward.
“Are you okay?” I watch him drop his stuff on the bedside table and strip off.
“Yeah. It went longer than we thought it would,” he says, climbing into bed with me and taking me in his arms. We were enjoying Kadence and Nix’s wedding until he and Beau were called off with club business. “Did I miss anything?” he asks, kissing the side of my neck.
“No, Nix and Kadence left not that long after you,” I tell him, remembering the look Kadence threw me before she left. I know I have some explaining to do, but tonight was not the night to talk about it.
“You get any shit after I left?” He smiles when I turn and face him.
“You mean after you kissed me in front of half the club?” I cock my brow.
“Yeah.” He laughs when he sees my expression.
“What do you think? I had Kadence and Kelly on me like a bad smell and I couldn’t get them to leave me alone,” I say, only half-annoyed. I made the decision back in the chapel that I was willing to let him in a little more. I knew keeping it from Kadence was getting harder, but when I looked up and saw Sy watching me, I knew I didn’t want him to feel like we were sneaking around.
“Well, I’m glad they all know. Now I don’t have to worry about sneaking you out of here tomorrow.” He runs his nose along my jaw.
“Are you going to tell me what happens on these pickups?” I ask, wondering what the urgency was.
“It’s not what you’d expect,” he shrugs, pulling back.
“It’s not drugs?” I joke, knowing it would never be that.
“Beau is working with this group of people who help women out of abusive relationships.”
“Really?” I ask, shocked for a moment. Okay, not what I was expecting.
“Yeah, it’s a big organization, spanning over a few states. Makes it easier to move the women without them getting caught.”
“Where do they go?” I ask, still getting my head around the fact the Knights Rebels are a part of this.
“Anywhere, everywhere. Tonight was only my second one. It wasn’t a recovery, but a drop off. She’s settling here in town and we’ll keep an eye on her.”
“So what’s the difference?”
“Well, this one was easy. She's going to be staying here in town. We’ll help her find a place, somewhere to work and we will keep her under our protection and make sure her asshole ex doesn't find her. The other one I’ve helped with was a transport. She was a young woman. We didn't pick her up from a shelter, or set her up in town. We took her from one pickup point and onto the next. We keep moving them along so the trail gets lost.”
“Do you know where she is now, or if her husband has found her?” I ask all at once. I’ve never heard of any of this before, and it blows my mind that things like this happen.
“No questions, no information is given. The person who sets up the move is the only one who knows full name and details. Everyone else just does their part. Makes it easier if anyone comes looking.”
“You’re amazing, do you know that?” I smile, loving that they are a part of something like this.
“It’s all Beau, baby. It’s his gig. We just help out when we can.”
“Well, you all are amazing,” I tell him before kissing him softly. “The Knights Rebels are amazing.”
“Yeah, yeah. Give your man some loving then if you think I’m so amazing.” He rolls me over so I’m covering his body.
“My man?” I tease, whispering in his ear.
“Yes, your man wants to fuck his old lady.” His hands dig into my flesh as I pull back at his comment.
“Umm, old lady?” I almost choke on the words. Old lady? Jesus, how did we get there?
“What do you think is happening here, Holly? You’re with me and I want you there by my side,” he says, pulling me back down into his space.
“I knew we were moving things along, Sy, but old lady? That shit is serious.” I fight the panic clawing at me. I’m not ready for that.
“I want serious, baby. You’re it for me.” He looks so sure that I feel bad that I’m questioning it, questioning us.
“I just, I thought we were going to go slowly, with everything happening,” I say, remembering his promise not to label it.
“Babe, I know we both have our own issues that might just make us a little fucked up, but sometimes I look at you and I think maybe being fucked up doesn’t have to be so bad.”
I don’t respond, unsure of how we came this far without my untold confession coming to light. I know I should tell him about our baby, but it’s like the secret is a virus, a disease spreading through me, taking control of my body from the inside. Now I’m stuck, it holds me hostage and no medication can cure my guilt.
“What are you thinking?” he asks, taking my chin and forcing me to look at him.
“Nothing, just trying to work through it, Sy.” I don’t want to ruin our moment, so I continue to keep my secret. He looks at me, assessing me in his own way, but I hold his stare, waiting to see where this goes.
“Well, work it out quick. I want to fuck my old lady,” he says, rolling us so now he covers my body.
“So everyone thinks I’m your old lady?”
“Yeah,” he mumbles, kissing down my neck.
“All of them?” I breathe out.
“Holly, half of them already knew we’ve been seeing each other,” he informs me before latching onto my nipple.
“What? Oh, God, they’ve known about us,” I rush out, getting my words caught as he rolls my nipple between his teeth.
“Don’t care,” he growls, moving onto the next one.
“Well, I care,” I moan, letting my concerns get lost in the sensation of his bite.
“You shouldn’t. You never used to.” He pulls back, watching me. “You never used to and maybe that’s a good thing, maybe it isn’t, but this here, Holly, is all that matters with us. Not anyone else. Just us, okay?”
I feel his words and believe them. I need to tell him.
“Sy,” I say, trying to find the words.
“Shhhh,” he whispers, moving down my naked body. “I just want to taste you,” he says before running his tongue along my stomach.
“Sy,” I try again, but know this isn’t the time when his fingers spread me open and he runs the tip of his nose along my center. I know I have to tell him and I will, just maybe not this second.
“I’m so fucking hungry, Holly. I could eat you all fucking night,” he groans like a starved man, before lightly skimming my clit.
“Don’t tease,” I complain, waiting for his touch.
“But I love watching you squirm, baby,” he purrs and blows a warm breath over my heat.
“Sy, quit it,” I demand when he lightly touches me again. It’s nowhere near enough to give me what I’m aching for.
“I’m not going to quit it, Holly. I’m going to slowly bring you apart with my mouth and then fuck you so hard you won’t be walking easily tomorrow.” He looks up, his eyes dancing with fire at his threat.
“Yes,” I eagerly plead, waiting for what he is offering.
“But before I do all that, I think I want to watch you suck me first.” He changes his play, crawling up my body and moving to the side.
“Sy, come on. Don’t be a tease,” I pout, frustrated I’m not getting the attention that I need.
“You know you love it.” He smirks as he rests back, his arms folded behind his head. “Knees, now, Holly,” he pushes, in his no-bullshit voice. Normally, if a guy talked to me like that I would tell him to fuck off, but the way Sy says it—demanding and unrelenting—makes me want to surrender. Moving down his body, I do as I’m told and reach for his rigid length.
“Spread those sexy legs so I’ve got a good view.” He continues to break me with his words. I should be embarrassed at my willingness to submit, but I’m not. My legs spread of their own accord, straddling his body so my pussy is in his line of sight.
“Fuck me, you have a pretty pussy, baby,” he says, running his callused finger through my wetness. I don’t know what qualifies as pretty, but whatever it is, I’m glad he approves. “Now, my pretty pussy,” he adds as I stroke him in my hand.
Leaning down, I lick the pre-cum beading on the tip of the bulging head. I savor the hiss that leaves his lips, letting it push me forward, taking him to the back of my throat.
“Fuck, baby,” he groans as he slides two fingers inside of me, stretching me. “That’s it. Suck my cock the way I like it and maybe I’ll let you come,” he growls, making me work harder.
The dynamics of our relationship is unlike what I’ve ever had before, but I know what Sy offers is what I need. He gives me permission to not be okay, to struggle and fall, and in return, I surrender. I allow him to take the lead and guide me back because if it weren’t for Sy, I’d still be sitting in the dark, exhausted, and fighting alone.
***
“No, no,” he shouts, pulling me from my sleep. Sitting up, it takes me a minute to get my bearings before I realize he’s dreaming. “Keira.” He continues thrashing next to me. I don’t know if I should wake him, or let it run its course, but the louder he gets, the more stressed he becomes.
“Don’t leave me, baby,” he mumbles and the darkness in his voice confuses me.
Who the hell is he talking about?
“Sy?” I shake him softly, but he’s a deep sleeper. This is the second time I’ve heard him call out in the middle of the night. “Sy,” I try again.
“Yeah?” he wakes, sleepy and confused.
“Are you okay?” I ask carefully. I don’t want to ask him who Keira is. The way he said her name has me holding off.
“Yeah, why?” he sits up and looks around the room.
“You were having a nightmare,” I tell him, watching him wipe the sweat off his brow.
“I’m fine.” Standing, he walks out of my room and to the bathroom. I’m not sure what’s happening, if I should follow him or leave him alone. Hearing the shower, I sit up and switch the bedside light on. I fight the need to go to him and the need to let him have a moment. My desire to comfort him wins out in the end.
“Can I get you anything?” I ask, walking in and watching him stand naked under the water.
“I'm good.” He looks up and I can see in his eyes something is haunting him, but I don’t push.
“Want some company?” I smile, hoping to make him feel better. We’ve shared a bed every night this week, always at my place, and for the last two nights, he’s woken shouting the same name.
“Yeah,” he smiles, liking the idea as much as I do. I strip off, and then step into the shower.
“Have I told you how fucking beautiful you are?” Leaning toward me, he kisses me as the warm water trickles over both of us.
“Yes, you have,” I reply, bringing my hands around his neck. “Have I told you how incredibly sexy you are?” I ask back. His body is amazing, making me weak just looking at it.
“Not as sexy as you.” He pushes me up against the glass.
“You want my mouth or my cock?” he asks presumptuously, running his nose along my jaw.
“What? You’re not even going to clean me first, Sunshine?” I smile and he acknowledges with a growl.
“Don’t tease me. I need you,” he complains. I relent, seeing just how on edge he is.
“You want my mouth or my pussy?” I ask the same question back, trying to give him what he needs.
“Dirty girl, you know I’ll take you any way, but right now, I need that tight cunt of yours,” he purrs, sending goose bumps to my skin.
“We don’t have a condom,” I sigh as his hand moves between my legs and trails his finger along the seam of my smooth lips.
“You know I’m clean. Haven’t been with anyone since you,” he says and as much as I want it to be my only issue, it’s not. The last thing I need right now is to get pregnant.
“I’m not on birth control,” I admit. When I found out I was pregnant, I stopped immediately and haven’t started back up again. He groans, resting his head to mine.
“I thought you were.”
“I was and now I’m not,” I tell him, hoping he doesn’t ask why.
“I wanna fuck you bare, babe. You need to sort that shit out,” he tells me, sounding unimpressed.
“I am. I’m getting the shot next month,” I laugh, watching him get pissy. I’ve been doing some research and found the shot would be best suited for me; no worrying about remembering to take a tablet the same time every day. I just have to wait for my next period. “Where’s your stash?” I step out and wrap myself in a towel.
“My wallet,” he answers, sulking like a little boy who’s had his candy stolen.
“Don’t pout,” I laugh, leaving him alone. I race back to my room to the bedside table and pull out a condom from his wallet. I’m about to close it when my eyes spy the photo hidden in the back. I know I shouldn't look and that going through his things is wrong, but the unknown is calling me to peek. Slowly, I pull it out and take in the family staring back at me. What the fuck? Sy has a family?
“What are you doing out there?” Sy calls out from the bathroom, but I’m so lost in the picture staring back at me that I don’t reply.
Sy has a wife and daughter and I had no idea. Does he still see them? Why doesn’t he talk about them?
“Holly, what the hell are you doing?” I look up and see him standing at the door, a towel wrapped around his waist. I didn’t even hear the shower turn off.
“You have a daughter?” I think I whisper the question, but I’ve never heard a whisper yelled so loud.
“What the fuck? Give that to me,” he demands, the earlier playfulness gone. I see the pain behind his eyes. That darkness that I once thought was anger now shows itself as grief.
“You had a daughter,” I correct myself, and his eyes tell me I guessed it right. He can’t hide the pain in his expression. “Keira,” I say her name, the same name he’s been speaking in his sleep. It all makes sense, now.
“How do you know?” His hands go to the doorway like he needs the balance just to stay upright.
“You call out for her at night,” I tell him in a soothing voice. The urgency to comfort him overwhelms me, but I know he won’t want that right now.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” His pained look goes back to the hard gaze I’ve come to know.
“How could you not talk about her?”
He doesn’t respond as he still holds my gaze. I can’t help the first tear that falls for him, for what he has lost. I don’t know what happened to Keira, but the pain in his voice when he calls her name deep in his sleep is raw. I hear it, feel it and standing in front of me right now, I see it. I don’t know how to comfort him. I don’t know how to get him out of this situation. When his emotions are raw, exposed to me in a way they have never been, I want to take it all back, let him have his space, but I had to push.
He walks past me, grabbing his jeans and shirt. Dropping the towel, he pulls them on without any underwear.
“Sy, talk to me,” I plead, watching him pick up his boots and cut.
“You shouldn’t have seen that,” he says, walking to me.
“Don’t leave,” I try again, wishing he wouldn’t shut me out.
“I’ve got to go.” He snatches his wallet from my hands and leaves me standing here, finally understanding him.
