Текст книги "Gemini"
Автор книги: Penelope Ward
сообщить о нарушении
Текущая страница: 14 (всего у книги 18 страниц)
“Selfish, yes, but I know you didn’t mean to hurt her.”
“No, Mom…no, that’s the last thing I wanted, believe me.”
530/727
“I think you need to write her a letter, son.”
“A letter?”
“Yes. She is not going to want to face you for a while, honey. And you won’t be able to explain it the way you want to in person.
There’s too much to the story and from what you told me, you really didn’t do a good job of articulating everything to her face to face.”
“No, I didn’t. I froze,” I said.
“Exactly. So, I want you to stay here with us today. Have a nice dinner, spend time with your sister, and clear your head.
Then, I want you to go home and sit down and focus on what you need to say to her.
Can you do that?”
“I don’t think I have a choice.”
“No, you don’t.”
That night, I spent a calm evening with my mother and sister, grateful to have such a wonderful family.
531/727
After an early dinner of spaghetti and meatballs and a couple of glasses of red wine, I felt more relaxed and took Callie for a walk around the neighborhood. Holding my sister’s hand, I felt for the first time like everything would somehow turn out okay. A lot of that had to do with the weight that was lifted after telling my mother.
At one point, Callie, stopped and was pulling me to go across the street.
“No, Callie, this way,” I said.
Callie was pulling me harder toward the street.
“Allison,” she said.
My heart pounded when I heard her say the name and then I realized Callie was pointing to a girl walking across the street with long dark hair. I soon realized it wasn’t Allison, but just the few seconds I thought it might be her, were enough to show me how intense it would be when I laid eyes on her again.
532/727
Would she even show up here to work with Callie next week? I don’t know how she could. If she does, at least my mother knows everything now.
She knows more than Allison does, in fact.
Not for long. I needed to get home and start working on that letter. I needed to pour my heart out to her, even if it’s the first and last time.
533/727
534/727
CHAPTER 32
ALLISON
Mercury, your Ruler, goes retrograde today, Gemini, so you might be quite reflect-ive. This presents a wonderful opportunity for great spiritual growth and deepening peace.
It had been a few days since Cedric’s revelation and I had asked for the week off from both jobs, citing a family emergency. I guess this could qualify as that.
I sat in my apartment alone listening to the sounds of children playing outside. It was Spring vacation week in Boston and the streets were filled with kids. The warm air blew through my window screen and the sounds of birds chirping helped me relax.
536/727
Amanda.
I have been sitting on the couch, staring at Amanda’s picture, still in disbelief. In the photo, she’s alone and leaning up against a tree. The sounds outside seem to add to the scene in the picture and I try to imagine her coming to life. In the photo, Amanda is smiling lovingly at the photographer. It was obvious who she was looking at and I still couldn’t wrap my head around it.
She was dead.
I didn’t even know she existed and she was dead. I would never know her.
But Cedric did.
Cedric knew more about my past than I did and that unnerved me.
Cedric was my sister’s boyfriend… my sister’s boyfriend. It still didn’t fully register.
There is so much more I need to know. Why was he the one looking for me anyway? Did my sister even know about me before she 537/727
died? I have so many questions. And why did he try to find me now?
There were so many questions left un-answered, but I wasn’t able to face him the other day a second longer once he told me the truth.
When I had first found the photo, it hadn’t even occurred to me for one second that it wasn’t me, even though I hadn’t remembered taking that picture. The shock I felt upon hearing that this was actually a photo of my twin was indescribable.
A twin.
This was like a bad Lifetime movie come true. It didn’t make sense at first, but the more I thought about it…it was certainly plausible: I never knew anything about my birth mother or the circumstances of my birth.
My mother always said she had no information either. I know that to be the truth, because my mother would have never kept 538/727
something like this from me. How could the people at the adoption agency have allowed the separation of two sisters?
The ringing of the phone startled me out of my thoughts.
I picked up. “Hello?”
“Al…just checking in,” Sonia said.
Sonia would call me everyday from her nursing rotation to make sure I haven’t done anything stupid. My mental state the first twenty-four hours after Cedric’s condo encounter was not stable. Sonia had considered taking me to a doctor to get anti-anxiety meds, but I refused.
“You don’t need to call me every two hours, you know,” I said.
“Have you stopped thinking about it for even a minute?”
“Of course not…would you stop thinking about it, if you found out you had a twin?
And then found out she was dead a minute later?”
539/727
“I can’t fucking imagine, Al. I can’t. I am so sorry.”
We were both silent for a bit and then I said. “I need to get out of the house. Let’s go out to dinner tonight.”
“Are you serious, Al? That would be fantastic! You really need to get your mind off of things. It’s a date.”
“Love you,” I said.
“Love you too.”
Just as I hung up the phone, it rang again and I picked up.
“Sonia…come on…this is ridiculous.” There was a pause.
“Allison?”
My stomach turned as I realized who it was. I didn’t respond.
“Allison? Are you there?”
“Yes,” I whispered as my heart beat rapidly.
“I’ve been so worried about you.”
“Why are you calling, Cedric?” 540/727
“I wanted to give you some space, but I couldn’t wait any longer. I need to hear your voice…to know you’re okay.”
“I’m okay, but I am not ready to talk to you.”
Cedric let out a deep breath into the phone. “Fair enough. I just needed to hear your voice, really. I still care about you, so much Allison. So much. Please don’t hate me. Please—”
I quietly hung up the phone because I was afraid of what I might say next. Tears streamed down my face. He thinks I hate him.
That was the problem. I didn’t hate him. My feelings for him were still strong and I hated myself for feeling this way.
*** A couple of more days passed and the funk I was in was slowly lifting.
541/727
It was seventy degrees outside and I decided to wear a delicate pink cotton sun-dress and take a walk.
Putting on some silver flip flop wedges and grabbing my purse, I headed out the door and breathed in the fresh mild air as a chorus of birds chirped. Days like these, I swear I could smell the scent of the sun.
I stopped at a corner store and bought something I hadn’t consumed in years…a Slush Puppy frozen drink. Sipping it fast through the tiny thin straw, I got brain freeze as I continued walking down the side streets of my neighborhood.
Two little girls holding hands skipping down the street passed me and I immediately thought of the sister I never knew.
Would we have been close like that? Would she still be alive if we weren’t separated?
Probably. What kind of mother separates identical twins?
542/727
My mood was darkening a bit and I decided to walk back to my apartment. As I approached my house, I dropped my drink on the sidewalk, startled to see Cedric sitting on the stairs waiting for me.
I froze as I saw him notice me and stopped about six feet short of him. His beautiful crystal blue eyes shined in the sunlight and looked like they were glowing. It pained me that he looked so goddamn handsome.
He had shaved that beard away and had just a little hair leftover on his chin. He was wearing a casual black fitted v-neck shirt and jeans and I could smell his intoxicating scent blowing toward me in the breeze.
We just stood there staring at each other. Even though I was scared, a part of me wanted him to approach me…hold me. I didn’t know exactly what this new situation meant for us, but the pull was still strong. It 543/727
was probably stronger than ever because he just seemed so forbidden to me now.
He was my sister’s boyfriend.
Cedric stood up, but didn’t approach me, as I kept my distance.
“You look good, Allison.”
The sound of his voice sent shivers throughout my body.
“Why are you here, Cedric?” I asked.
“Actually, I wanted to give you this.” He reached out a yellow envelope, prompting me to take it. Was he serving me with some legal document? What is this?
“What is it?” I asked nervously.
“It’s everything. Everything I wanted to tell you, but couldn’t…the other day.” Finally approaching him, my hand was shaking as I took the envelope from him carefully avoiding touching his skin. Cedric stood still, never taking his eyes off mine. He seemed to be desperately searching my eyes 544/727
for a clue as to what I was feeling and then said, “Promise me, you’ll read it, Allison.” I continued staring at him, still wanting desperately for him to touch me, knowing he wouldn’t cross that line and that if he did, I would pull back.
“I will,” I finally said.
I flinched as Cedric’s hand touched my cheek and I briefly closed my eyes, relishing the brief contact before he returned his arm down and said. “Thank you.” I walked past him up my front stairs, taking the envelope with me.
Before walking in the front door, I looked back briefly to find Cedric standing in place, with his hands in his pockets looking at me, the sun glare making him only par-tially visible. Then, I closed the door behind me.
***
545/727
It was nightfall and the yellow envelope taunted me from across the room. I wanted so badly to open it, but hadn’t yet mustered up the courage. I was truly afraid of what I might discover in it.
Prolonging the inevitable, I chose instead to daydream about the Cedric I knew before all of this happened.
I so missed the feeling of being on cloud nine and so infatuated, of being held by him and feeling safe in his arms. It was such short time in retrospect…but it was truly the best time of my life. But it wasn’t real.
I wondered how much time Amanda had with him…how close they were, whether his feelings were stronger for her than for me. I hated myself for thinking that, but I couldn’t help it. I felt sick. I knew that maybe everything I needed to know was in that letter and decided I just needed to just open it, already.
546/727
So, taking a deep breath, I stood up from the couch and walked over to the letter lying on the table.
Picking it up, I returned to the couch and rubbed my hands over the fairly large yellow envelope.
My heart thumped furiously and I opened a window to let some air in.
I took another deep breath and exhaled, opening the envelope slowly, careful not to rip the contents. Inside was a folded letter with a few pages stapled together and handwritten on heavy high quality stock paper. My chest was heaving in anticipation as I started to read it.
Dear Allison,
First of all, thank you for taking thetime to read this. I know it must have been adifficult decision to open this letter. It’s difficult for me to even think about you reading 547/727
everything I am about to write. But I am also relieved to be able to finally tell you everything. I would say that I wished I had told you this story that first day I laid eyes on you, but that wouldn’t be the truth. I am fairly certain that if I had bombarded you with the truth about me early on, I would have never experienced what were truly the best days of my life, the weeks spent with you, as your friend and as your lover.
I have to start from the beginning. Iwas 21 when I met Amanda Thompson. Shewas a freshman and I was a senior atNorthwestern. I spotted her across the roomat a campus party and was immediatelytaken by her. She walked in and immediately fell on her ass after she slipped on thefloor that was wet from the keg. I startedcracking up and she walked over to me tokick my ass and the rest was history. Shewas beautiful in a natural way and easy totalk to. I dated a lot in those days and it was 548/727
rare that one girl kept my attention for longer than a week. But Amanda was different. I was a bit of a jackass back then, but she didn’t seem to be scared away by that persona. She was smart enough to see it
was a persona. I was a kid with a tough exterior from the streets of Boston. She was a sheltered Daddy’s girl from the suburbs. But Amanda seemed to be able to peel through the fake layers I had built up and had a way of making me want to open up about the real me…my insecurities and fears, my hopes and dreams.
She was young, only seventeen whenI met her. I was her first real boyfriend. Igot to know her parents, Ed and Elainepretty well during that time and they werepretty cool with everything, as long as Ididn’t spend the night in her room and viceversa. She lived at home and I lived on campus, so sometimes I would go over to herparent’s house for dinner. Ed and Elaine 549/727
had adopted Amanda as a newborn and she was their only child. They treated her like a princess because they were so happy to have her since they couldn’t have kids of their own. She even looked a little like Elaine.
We dated for almost a year. I was her first. Up until the end, it was the first time in my life that I had never cheated on a girlfriend. She would tell me that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. I told her I loved her, but truthfully I had my doubts about making a lifelong commitment so young. I was getting ready to graduate and possibly move away and she was just starting college. But Amanda didn’t care about all that. She just wanted to be with me. That wasn’t enough for me, Allison. What came next is the hard part of my story.
One night Amanda came to my dormafter I had ignored her calls that day. Shecaught me kissing another girl. It hadn’tgotten as far as anything further and 550/727
probably wouldn’t have, but I had lost control of myself in the days leading up to that.
I was probably going to end things for her own good, but never expected her to see what she walked in on. She was devastated, Allison and the second I saw the look on her face, I was devastated too. I knew then and there that I cared so much about this person. I felt like I had hurt my best friend and I had.
Amanda ran out of my room that night and drove off. She was upset and probably driving erratically. That was the night of the car accident that eventually killed her. I am so sorry to be the one to have to tell you this, Allison. I still to this day feel some of the blame for what happened, most of the blame, actually. Your sister was so strong. She fought for her life for many days in and out of a coma.
What I need you to know is thatshortly before Amanda died, Ed and Elaine 551/727
told her about you. They didn’t know your name or where you were living, but Elaine had gotten information from a friend at the adoption agency years before, that there had been a twin born to the anonymous birth mother who had you and Amanda.
Other than that, Elaine only knew that your Mom was a fifteen-year-old drug addict.
Amanda’s parents decided to tell her about you after she turned eighteen and vowed to help find you if that was what she wanted.
On her hospital bed on the day she died, her last words to me were to ask me to find you. She said ‘find my sister.’
I had a really hard time after Amanda died. I blamed myself and Caleb actually came and stayed with me for several weeks. I never even told my mother about anything that happened there or the truth about you until a few days ago.
There is one other upsetting thingthat I need to tell you. It’s really why I think 552/727
I have been so afraid to tell you the truth.
It’s the one part of my past I am most ashamed of and it’s very difficult for me to talk about even to this day. But I want to tell you everything. When Amanda was in the hospital, the doctors had discovered she had been pregnant at the time of the accident and lost the baby. It was my baby, Allison.
Amanda had not yet told me and I don’t even know if she knew. She told me she was on the pill and I trusted that I couldn’t get her pregnant. I still struggle with whether she knew or not when she caught me that night, whether that’s why she had been calling me a lot that day. And more than that, I struggle with the fact that I helped cause an accident that also killed my own child. I know that it is probably very difficult for you to hear this and I am sorry to have to tell you that about me.
553/727
I put down the letter and started sobbing.
I
couldn’t
read
anymore
right
now…and there was a lot left unread.
Walking over to the refrigerator, I wiped my eyes with my shirt, poured myself a glass of water and sat down at the kitchen table, taking a long sip. Rubbing my temples, I breathed in and out repeatedly trying to process what Cedric revealed. So many emotions floated through my head.
While I found Cedric’s honesty endearing, it was all too much to take at once as shock, sadness and jealousy hit me like a ton of bricks.
I was still in shock to learn about how my sister died. I also felt sad that Cedric blamed himself. Clearly, he never could have predicted what would happen.
Jealousy also consumed me. My sister had been intimate with Cedric and they had created a child together, something that I would never get to experience with him.
554/727
Even though the baby tragically died, a child was conceived. That child would have also been related to me.
Shaking my head, I tried to make sense of it all. My breathing slowed and I wanted to know more. I needed to know more, so I walked back over to the couch and picked up the letter again.
So, you’re probably wondering why all of this is coming to light now, twelve years later.
After Amanda died, I managed tograduate and ended up staying in Chicagofor about eight years. That’s where I startedmy career, before I moved back to Boston. Ikept in touch with Ed and Elaine duringthose years. Sometimes, they would have meover for dinner and we would talk aboutAmanda. I think I reminded them of her andthey liked to see me from time to time forthat reason. I had even later confided in 555/727
them about what happened the night of the accident and they tried to convince me it wasn’t my fault. All these years, I still don’t fully believe that. Anyway, they’re good, forgiving, people and they didn’t deserve to lose their only child.
The Thompsons had tried to get information on their own over the years aboutyour whereabouts and kept hitting deadends. They felt they owed it to Amanda tofind you. I think they missed her so muchthat they wanted to find a part of her alivein you. They used a couple of private investigators and finally hired a different guy alittle over a year ago and this one was ableto figure out the name of the person who adopted you (your Mom). With that information, he was able to determine your nametoo and that you lived in Boston. This investigator, named Brandon Samuels, thenfound out your address and followed youone day to the Stardust diner, which is how 556/727
I knew where you worked. He gave all of the information to the Thompsons and they contacted me and asked if I would be the one to meet you first. Ed has been battling cancer and it wasn’t the right time for them to travel to Boston, because it would have interrupted his treatments. We all couldn’t believe that you were in the same city as me to begin with. So, it seemed to make sense that I would be the one to approach you.
I had every intention of doing theright thing that first day I walked into thediner. When I saw you, though, I was blownaway and lost all sense of reason. It was likelooking at a grown up version of Amanda,but you were even more beautiful than Icould have ever imagined you’d be. Iwatched you talk to the customers and yourdemeanor was so sweet. I just wanted towatch you, like a fly on the wall. I didn’tknow how I could possibly bring up the subject of why I came to see you, so I just stared 557/727
at you. I wasn’t expecting to have that kind of reaction. I needed more time to just let it sink in. So, I left that day, but I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about you. I decided I wanted to get to know you before springing everything on you. So, I planned to go back to the diner another time and maybe strike up a conversation. That was the day you weren’t there, that I left my credit card. Obviously, you know that was the same night I drove you home and we talked for the first time. When I found out you had no family, I was floored, but it also made me want to be there for you in some way.
With every second we spent together,I became more and more blinded by my intense attraction to you. I gave into thetemptation to continue the façade, becausemy feelings for you were real and I wanteddesperately to explore them without judgment. I have never felt so drawn to anyoneso quickly. You may think that it was 558/727
because you looked like her, but that’s not entirely the case. A lot can change in twelve years, both physically and emotionally. If anything, I was actually surprised at how little you actually reminded me of the eighteen-year-old girl I knew. I was basically a boy when I dated your sister, Allison.
I didn’t know what I wanted and it’s quite likely Amanda and I wouldn’t have ended up together had she lived. I wasn’t done sewing my wild oats (and she hadn’t even started) and it’s quite possible, I would have fucked things up.
I know my decision to take things asfar I did with you was selfish. But I don’t regret it, Allison. I just don’t. From that firstnight in the car, I knew there was no goingback. I had no control over the pull I felt toward you. I needed to have you, to be withyou. I always intended to tell youeverything, even after we got together—youneed to know that. I wasn’t going to keep it 559/727
from you forever; I just didn’t feel the time was right. Really, I didn’t want to lose you, so I kept putting it off.
Around New Years, things had just gotten sexual between us and I was falling hard for you. I couldn’t get enough of you.
That’s when my world started crumbling around me. I got a call from Elaine around that time that changed things for me and made me realize I was no longer in control of when you would find out the truth. She told me that in the course of the investiga-tion to find you, Investigator Samuels also located your birth mother. Not only that, this woman wanted to know how to find you. I knew that it was only a matter of time before you would find everything out and that scared the shit out of me. I decided not to make things even more complicated by continuing to get more serious with you until I either I grew the guts to tell you or you found out another way.
560/727
The night that I ran into you at my mother’s, I had planned to finally tell her everything. I needed to get it off my chest and wanted her advice as to how to handle things, because I was obviously not handling them at all. When you asked me if I was seeing someone else, I was caught off guard, panicked and lied. That was a stupid thing to do, but it just came out. I know that didn’t help things. I wasn’t seeing anyone else and I’m still not. I am so sorry for lying to you.
I am most sorry that finding the photo in my mother’s basement upset you.
That must have been a shock. I didn’t evenremember that I had that binder. Thosewere the only physical items I had to remember her by, that were mine. But now, inretrospect, I am glad you found it. It forcedme to tell you the truth, which you deservedall along. Just a note, I don’t have any otherinformation about your birth mother. Edand Elaine never heard from her beyond 561/727
that initial information from the investigator. I don’t know if she has contacted you directly, but the investigator can get her info for you if you would like to contact her. I’ll send you an email with his contact information, as well as the contact info for Ed and Elaine Thompson. They really want to meet you, Allison and I hope you can make that happen for them. Don’t blame them for my mistakes.
I can only hope at this point that you don’t hate me, but you’ll never hear me say that I regret even one second of being with you. I’ll understand if you can’t, but if you ever find it in your heart to forgive me—that would mean the world to me—you mean the world to me.
Cedric
P.S. Hopefully you noticed that there is something else in this envelope.
562/727
What? I grabbed the yellow envelope that the letter was contained in and reached into the bottom. Inside, was a small Ziploc bag and as I took the note out of it, a ring fell out. What the—?
It was a beautiful antique looking white gold or silver ring with a green stone.
The design was really ornate and stunning.
What was this about? I unfolded the note that read:
Allison, I bought this ring at an antique fair right after I first laid eyes on you.
It reminded me so much of the color of your eyes…the stone even has the same gold speckles. I just had to get it. It was a family heirloom of the old lady that sold it to me.
She made me promise to give it to someonespecial. I knew even then I’d give it to yousomeday. Even though I know I have lostmy chance with you, I still want you to have 563/727
it because it belongs to you. Please let it remind you always how special you are.
The ring fit perfectly on my right ring finger. A tear fell down my cheek as I wiggled my hand to catch the reflection of the light in the stone. It was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever given me.
564/727
CHAPTER 33
CEDRIC
Five Months Later
We were by the ocean in West Palm Beach. Allison was straddling me on the sand, her big beautiful green eyes shining in the sunlight. Callie ran by and poured water out of a bucket all over us and we laughed hysterically, both getting up and chasing after Callie toward the shoreline. Allison, Callie and I fell to the ground in the water still laughing uncontrollably. We were distracted when all of a sudden a gargantuan wave approached, but Allison was facing me and didn’t see it coming. The wave pushed Callie and I to shore, but Allison was gone. “Allison!”
566/727
“Allison!”
“Cedric? Cedric! Wake up!” Stephanie yelled, shaking my shoulders.
My eyes blinked repeatedly and my heart pounded. “Wha—Stephanie?”
“You were having a nightmare. Who’s Allison?” she asked.
“Huh?” I said, intentionally avoiding the question.
“Who’s Allison? You were yelling for Allison,” she repeated.
“Oh. Yeah. No one. I don’t know. It’s okay. Go back to bed.”
Good answer, asshole.
Stephanie sighed and rolled over, but I could tell she was still awake. God, I hope my sleep talk wasn’t too dramatic. I dream a lot about Allison, but this was the first time I had done it in front of someone.
Stephanie and I have been dating over a month now. She is a lawyer at a firm down-town and we met in the Boston Common 567/727
during our respective lunch breaks. I had been mulling over life on a bench when she sat down beside me with her Au Bon Pain salad. We shared stories about our jobs and watched together as kids ran around in the frog pond. We ended up meeting for dinner that night and have been casually dating ever since.
I have been forcing myself to move on.
She started sleeping over a couple of nights ago. We hadn’t had sex yet, mostly because I haven’t crossed that line. I am pretty sure she is ready and willing. Actually, I know that for a fact being that she literally tried to get into my boxers last night, but I haven’t wanted to go there for some reason.
For some reason…who am I kidding?
I know why.
Stephanie is beautiful, Filipino, with nice skin, a pretty smile, a great personality and she is smarter than probably anyone I 568/727
know. It’s not that I am not attracted to her.
I just…I don’t know.
Stephanie was making waffles in my kitchen when I strolled out of bed.
“Good morning, dreamy.”
“Mornin’.”
“That dream must have been intense.
You were shaking, Cedric.”
“Was I?”
Drop the subject. Drop the subject.
Drop the subject.
“Yeah. I am glad I woke you up.”
“Me too.”
Another lie. I would take being withAllison any way I could, even in the form ofa bizarre dream.
“What did you want to do today?” It was Labor Day. I knew my mother was having a cookout, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go over there. Stephanie and I were supposed to be hanging out too and I 569/727
would probably have to bring her. I wasn’t really ready to introduce her to my mother.
“What did you have in mind?” Just as I spoke those words, my phone rang and I answered it.
“Hello.”
“Sup, shitface.”
“Wassup, Caleb.”
“You better get your ass down to Mom’s today or she is gonna roast more than that pig.”
“You and Denise going?”
“Of course, you think we could get away with not going to Ma’s cookout? Although I think Denise is gonna throw up when she smells the pig…her senses have been in overload this pregnancy.”
“Who else is gonna be there?”
“Just Callie, Maria, Kurt and maybe Bruno, I think…the usual crew.”
“Okay, we’ll probably show up for a bit.”
570/727
“We?” he asked curiously.
I walked into the bedroom so Stephanie couldn’t hear everything I was saying.
“I told you about Stephanie,” I whispered in a barely audible voice.
“Yeah, you did. But you didn’t sound too enthusiastic…so I just assumed—”
“She’s cool,” I whispered.
“Cool…but not—”
“Yeah, yeah…I know what you’re gonna say.”
“You do?”
“I fucking dreamt about her last night…out loud. I fucking wake up to Stephanie asking me who fuck Allison is.
How fucked up is that?
“Pretty fucked up.”
“Yeah.”
“Well, it’s good you’re trying to move on. I mean you still haven’t heard from her right?”
571/727
“Not a thing. I still don’t even know where she is.”
“Hmmm.”
“Gotta go…I’ll see you later,” I said and hung up the phone.
I waited before going back into the kitchen, sitting on the bed, staring out the window. It was a beautiful cool sunny day where you couldn’t distinguish whether it was late summer or early fall in Boston.
The last time I had seen Allison was the day I gave her the letter five months ago.
