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Gemini
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Текст книги "Gemini"


Автор книги: Penelope Ward



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Текущая страница: 10 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

me

something!”

“Seriously?” I asked.

“Yes! Come on…show me what you can put together in three minutes,” she said.

My head fell back in disbelief and laughter. She was actually gonna make me do this?

“Okay. Three minutes…hold on,” I said.

I walked over to the hotel room desk and grabbed the pad of paper and pen.

Returning to the bed, I began to write down some lines, laughing to myself at how stupid this was, but I wanted to make her laugh and show her I was up for anything.

Allison stared at the screen for those few minutes smiling and giggling watching me write.

I looked at the alarm clock…my three minutes were up…so I returned to the 362/727

screen. “Okay…ready? This is for you, sweetheart.”

I quickly grabbed my sunglasses and put my baseball cap on sideways and began to sing, gesturing with my hands.

I met her in a diner.

Never seen a girl finer.

She gave me such a thrill.

I left a fifty-dollar-bill.

Left my credit card behind.

But you know I didn’t mind.

Took a Ride Unplanned.

Wrote her digits on my hand.

Found Out she works with my SIS-ter…

Before I even kissed her She tasted so divine.

Now, I want to make her mine.

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Allison’s face was in her hands and she was laughing so hard, that she had to wipe her eyes. I loved being able to make her laugh.

She

lifted

her

blushing

face.

”Cedric…Oh My God…I can’t believe you put together in three minutes! Thank you…that was awesome!” she said.

“You’re welcome, beautiful.” After a pause, the mood got quieter.

I wish you were here, you know that?” I said.

“What would we do if I were?” Allison asked.

The images that flashed in my imagination were suitable for mature audiences only.

“Hmmm…let’s see. There’s this lovely mini bar over there. I might have offered you a frozen Snickers bar if you behaved.” Allison laughed. “What else?” she said.

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“Well, I could have interested you in a nice pay per view movie.” I joked.

“That sounds like fun. Where would be watching the movie?”

“I’d probably be in the bed and I’d make you sit over there on that nice hotel sofa across the room.”

“Oh really?” Allison’s raised her eyebrows in jest.

I laughed. “Ok, maybe not. Maybe I would have you right here next to me and with the way I am feeling right now, that would be really dangerous.

“How are you feeling, Cedric?” Allison whispered.

I paused and gave her the honest answer.

“I am feeling like I want to devour you.”

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CHAPTER 21

ALLISON

I was pathetic. One simple statement from this man and my underwear was drenched.

I gulped and was sure I turned red.

“You want to devour me?”

“Yes,” he whispered. “Is that okay?” His eyes were glowing. I wondered exactly what that meant and my body reacted to the possibilities.

I nodded in agreement silently into the web cam, closed my eyes and sighed, feeling by body temperature rise.

“I can’t wait for Friday, Allison, but we never have to do anything you are not ready for…but as soon as you tell me you want it—”

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I interrupted. “I want it, Cedric. I want you…all of you.”

I can’t believe I just said that out loud.

It was the first time my thoughts escaped my head and it was like I vomited them right out of my mouth.

Cedric closed his eyes and let out a long slow breath and nodded slowly. “You have no idea how much I want you, Allison.

God, from the moment I first laid eyes on you...”

We started into each other’s eyes at a loss for words. Cedric smiled and had me really wishing I could jump through that screen.

“Cedric, I remember the first time I saw you too, feeling connected to you.” He shook his head and let out a deep breath. “I wanted to kiss you so badly that night in my car.”

“Why didn’t you?” I asked.

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“I should say it was because I had a girlfriend, but that wasn’t exactly it. I just didn’t have the guts that night. It would have seemed too random. We had just met.”

“And the night in Callie’s room?” I asked.

“I was definitely planning to drive you home that night and was dying to kiss you…but you ran, remember?”

“Yes.” I laughed. “I thought you had a girlfriend.

It

was

a

self-protective

mechanism.”

Cedric laughed heartily showing off his beautiful white teeth, which seemed even whiter on the web cam.

I didn’t mean to, but I yawned.

“Sweetheart, it’s late for you. I know you need to work early tomorrow. Can we please do this again tomorrow night?” Cedric asked.

I loved when he called me sweetheart.

“Absolutely.” I smiled. “Same time?” 370/727

“I am not exactly sure of my schedule tomorrow. So, I’ll text you during the afternoon and let you know what time to log on.

Sound good?”

“Sounds great,” I said.

“Good night, Allison.”

“Good night, Cedric.”

Cedric touched his hand to his mouth and blew me a kiss before disappearing from the screen.

*** Mercury, your ruler, is receiving kudos from the Moon, Gemini, resulting in a jubilant day. Romance is in the air, as you crave fun and are easily entertained. Hang on and enjoy the ride!

Well, Wednesday certainly didn’t start out like my horoscope predicted. The afternoon spent with Lucas turned out to be quite eventful, but not in a good way.

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As usual, I was dressed in my Wonder Woman uniform and superhero boots.

Today, Lucas’s mother Pat asked me to take him out on a few errands. I drove with Lucas to a nearby small one level shopping mall.

There was a Walmart inside and a food court where I could have Lucas eat an early dinner and practice using money to pay for his meal. (Yes, I was still wearing the uniform to the mall.)

Lucas liked to go in the mock hur-ricane machine, so I added the quarters in and let the wind blow in his face repeatedly until he tired of it.

We made our way over to the Chinese takeout restaurant in the food court, and just as we sat down, an indoor train that parents paid to have their kids ride in, started making its way around the mall.

Lucas had always been sensitive to certain sounds, but for some reason, this particular train horn, really upset him. As 372/727

the train approached, he got up from the table so fast and began running down the mall covering his ears.

I abandoned our food and chased after him as fast as I could, but he was such a fast runner. I could only imagine what people were thinking: a grown woman dressed as Wonder Woman chasing after a grown man covering his ears.

Lucas tripped and fell flat on his face before I was able to catch up with him. He had a pretty bad gash on his forehead. By this time, we were far away from the train sound, so he had calmed down. I felt so badly for him but I couldn’t lift him off of the ground.

A mall security guard helped me hoist him up off the floor and a nice woman got me some paper towel to add pressure to Lucas’s cut.

I immediately called his mother to let her know I was going to take him to the 373/727

walk-in clinic on the way home to make sure he didn’t need stitches. It was a pretty bad gash.

*** Pat met us at the clinic and we had to wait an hour to be seen. By the time the doctor came out it was almost 7:00 at night. My shift normally ended at 7:00 but I didn’t want to leave until I knew he was okay.

As I sat in the office as the doctor examined Lucas, my phone chimed. It was a text from Cedric.

Cedric: Hi, beautiful. I can’t

wait to Skype with you tonight.

Would 11:00 your time be too late?

I would stay up until any hour to Skype with him.

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Allison: Not too late at all.

Looking forward to “seeing” you.

Cedric: I would tell you to wear

something sexy, but a paper bag

would be sexy on you. ;-)

Allison: If you could only see

what I am wearing now.

Cedric: ????

Allison: Remember I told you

about the 20-year-old man I work

with? He has an obsession with Won-

der Woman and I have to dress like

her or else he won’t acknowledge me.

Cedric: LOL. Are you serious?!

That is fucking awesome.

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Allison: You should have seen

me today at the mall chasing after

him in it.

Cedric: Shit. I would have paid

serious money to see that!

Allison: I have to run…I am still

with Lucas.

Cedric: Ok…talk to you at 11

***

I finally got back to my apartment about 9:00.

Pat had insisted on buying me dinner at McDonald’s (Lucas’s favorite) before I headed home and thankfully, Lucas did not need stitches, because it would have been really fun trying to hold him down for that.

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The first thing I did was take a nice hot shower. As I lathered my body with the foamy soap, I closed my eyes and imagined it was Cedric massaging me. I intentionally held off on touching myself down there because I wanted to do it after I got off of Skype, like last night when I gave myself the most intense orgasm I had ever experienced alone, because Cedric had gotten me so worked up. I closed my eyes and thought about his sexy stomach and that tattoo that drives me wild. I really needed to see him again. Friday could not come soon enough.

I got out of the shower and towel dried my hair. I decided to let it air-dry wavy tonight. I put on a fitted periwinkle blue long-sleeved cotton casual jersey dress and made up my face.

All I needed to do now was sit down, relax with some tea and wait for my call with Cedric.

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*** I was surprised when I received a text from Cedric at 10:30.

Cedric: Hey. Are you home? I

got done a little early and so, I

wondered if you wanted to Skype in

like five minutes.

Allison: Hi. Yes, sure…I’ll turn it

on.

Cedric: Can I ask you a favor?

Allison: Sure. What is it?

Cedric: Can you show me what

you look like as Wonder Woman? Can

you wear the costume when we

Skype? I’ve been thinking about it all

day since you told me.

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Allison: Are you serious?! I just

showered and changed out of it.

Cedric: Ok. :-( Never mind.

Allison: You really want to see

it?

Cedric: Yes!

Allison: Okay, I’ll change.

Cedric: Really? Yes! Just for

that, I’ll wear my Clark Kent glasses.

My contacts are acting up anyway

and I want to be able to see this

clearly?

Allison: I’ll bet you look sexy in

glasses. See you in a few.

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Cedric: xo

I laughed hysterically as I ripped off my dress and grabbed my Wonder Woman outfit, which consisted of a strapless red tank with gold accents and a royal blue mini skirt with stars. I topped it off with the gold crown and put on my red thigh high boots. In public, I wore a blue cardigan over the top, but I would leave it off for Cedric. I can’t believe he is making me do this…but I would do anything for him at this point.

I sat on my bed in character now, feeling like a goof, wondering what Cedric will look like in his Superman glasses.

I jumped at the sound of my phone. It was another text from Cedric.

Cedric:

Are

you

in

your

costume?

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Allison: Yes…I turned on Skype.

I am waiting for you to go online.

Cedric: I am not going to be able

to Skype tonight after all, sweetheart.

What?

Allison: Okay. What happened ?

Cedric: Well, for one there is no

wireless in your hallway.

I read over the text again. There was no…wireless…in…MY HALLWAY?

I shrieked, ran to the door and opened it up the sexiest man in glasses I have ever seen.

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CHAPTER 22

CEDRIC

As I ran on the treadmill at the hotel gym on Wednesday morning, I got the call that would change my week entirely.

The general manager at KABV-TV

cancelled my meeting scheduled for that day, so I immediately called my Thursday morning client and cancelled them too. Figuring I would now have to come back to ll.A. another time to meet with KABV, I would reschedule both meetings for another time. Dripping with sweat, my heart raced as I thought about feeling her next to me again. This meant I could go home and be with Allison again almost two days early, so I wasted no time getting myself on the 11:00 am flight back to Boston.

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*** On the flight home, I closed my eyes and thought about how I should surprise her.

I decided I would text her on my layover in Newark and pretend I was still in California, arranging the time to Skype tonight. I should have enough time to drop by my condo, shower and change, assuming no delays.

The flight attendant startled me out of my fantasies when she offered me a drink.

I opted for a glass of Merlot to help me relax.

As I slowly sipped the wine, nerves overcame me as I pondered whether I was making the right decision diving headfirst into a romantic relationship with the one woman on Earth that should be forbidden.

Unfortunately, she’s all I can think about and all I want.

So many people could get hurt if things don’t work in my favor, not only 385/727

Allison and me, but Mom and Callie. Mom would find out the truth about everything if… when…I had to tell Allison. When would I tell her the truth? I wasn’t ready to go there and needed to make sure she trusted me first. More than anything, selfishly, I needed to have her…at least once…before I ever possibly lost the chance. If that means I am going to Hell, then so be it.

A cornucopia of emotions flooded through me on that flight home: guilt, longing, grief for something I haven’t even lost yet. Allison wasn’t just special for what she meant to me before I laid eyes on her in that diner that first day. Every moment spent with her since, has made me realize feelings in myself that I thought were long dead and some feelings I have never experienced before. Maybe, by some miracle, there would be a way to make her understand why I needed to wait to tell her the truth.

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The fasten seatbelt signal snapped me out of my ruminations as the plane prepared to land.

When we arrived in Newark, I had only a half hour layover. The first thing I did was text Allison. When she responded to me about the Wonder Woman costume she had to wear for work, I nearly lost it. That sounded so sexy, even though I knew she wasn’t intending to be. We planned to Skype later tonight, which really meant I would be showing up at her apartment to surprise her. The confused emotions I felt on the plane from ll.A. disappeared as my excitement grew.

The trip to Boston, which was a quick commuter flight, seemed to take forever. The jet was smaller and I was sandwiched between two older women, one of whom smelled like gasoline while the other ate tuna. When we touched down at Logan 387/727

Airport, I grabbed a cab to my condo and was so happy to be off that plane.

*** It felt amazing to be home. I had about a half hour to shower and change before heading over to Allison’s house and I really needed to look good for her tonight.

Unfortunately, the dry air on the plane did a number on my eyes; with my contacts acting up, I would be wearing my glasses. My hair was gelled to perfection and I wore dark blue Levis and a navy blue hen-ley, spraying ample cologne and grabbing a few condoms, just in case.

I was pretty confident Allison wanted to have sex tonight, but I wasn’t going to assume anything; After all, I would be springing this visit on her, but I needed to be prepared.

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I was ready to go, but running earlier than our scheduled Skype call. I decided to head over there anyway, impatient as hell to see her.

On the drive to her house, I couldn’t get the image of that that friggin’ sexy Wonder Woman costume out of my head. By the time I pulled into a parking spot around the corner form her house, I decided to text her to let her know I was ready to Skype early and to ask her to wear the costume for our

“call.” Can’t blame a man for trying, right? I was amazed when she actually agreed and I got hard just imagining what she would look like opening that door.

I sat in the car for a few minutes before we were set to Skype and then got out walking around the corner to her house.

Luckily, the front door was open and I only needed to make my way up the stairs before texting her one last time to let her know that 389/727

I couldn’t Skype because I was actually texting from her hallway.

After I typed the words, ‘no wireless in your hallway’, there was a pause as I stood outside her door, my heart pounding violently.

I heard her shriek.

“What?!” Allison squealed from behind the door and this made me laugh out loud.

When she opened the door, my heart nearly stopped at the sight of her.

I rushed into her and buried my nose in her neck breathing her fruity scent in. She squeezed me so tightly; I could feel her soft breasts against my chest bursting through the red tube top.

I stepped back taking her in and grabbed her face, pulling her lips into mine, kissing her passionately.

She pulled back, suddenly, panting from

my

kiss.

“Cedric…oh

my

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God…wha…what are you doing back tonight?” she asked, her face flushed and her hands shaking as she cupped my chin.

I gave no response, just stared at her, grabbing her trembling hands and kissing them softly.

Allison looked like there should be a halo of light surrounding her. I felt like a horny preteen whose favorite superhero just came to life out of a comic book. Her dark hair was shiny and flowing underneath a golden crown. Her beautiful breasts spilled out of the shiny red strapless top and I could see her hard nipples through the fabric…and the boots… the boots… red thigh high boots.

“God, you are so fucking beautiful,” I whispered, pulling her toward me again, kissing the bottom of her neck hard and working my way up to her lips, which she parted as I thrust my tongue into her mouth hungrily.

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She moaned as I continued to plunge my tongue deeper and deeper into her mouth, never quite getting enough. With each moan, I got harder and harder imagining what she would sound like when I was inside of her.

I pulled back after a few minutes, still holding her face in my hands. “I couldn’t wait another night Allison. My meeting was cancelled today, so I got on the first flight I could. I hope this is a good surprise?” Allison’s green eyes beamed with golden speckles. “Cedric…this is the best surprise.” She smiled as she ran her fingers through

my

hair,

looking

at

me

affectionately.

“Thank you for letting me see you in this,” I said, rubbing my hands up and down her arm, glancing down at her breasts, to her flat stomach down to her legs.

Laughing, she reached up cupping my face with her hand. “Oh my God…you were 392/727

not kidding about the glasses, too. I love you in them. You look so studious and sexy…totally Clark Kent.”

I gave her a mischievous smile and kissed her again. “Glad you like them, sweetheart.”

“You must be starved. Can I get you something to eat?” Allison asked.

I stared deeply into her eyes and shook my head. I needed her to know how much I wanted her, how little self-control I had left. “The only thing I am hungry for is you.”

With that, Allison pulled me toward her face, taking my mouth into hers and walking backwards as we moved in synch and I pushed her into the bedroom.

I broke away from the kiss for a few seconds to just stare at her and take in the moment.

Looking down at her soft neck, I realized that I had given her a small hickey. I 393/727

pulled her toward me again, sucking on her neck even harder wanting to mark her over and over again, making her mine.

Pushing her down onto the bed, I continued sucking at her neck and felt her soft hands run through my hair, pushing me down onto her breasts which I started to kiss gently, licking them in circles through the fabric.

Her panting showed me that she wanted me to keep going.

Dying to suck on her breasts bare, I pushed the fabric of her strapless top down, exposing them. Goddamit, she wasn’t even wearing a bra. I wasn’t expecting to see them right then and there when I did that. Like the rest of her, her breasts were perfect…medium sized, firm, with soft pink buds. Squeezing them together, I buried my face in them, kissing and licking a line up and down her cleavage as she held onto my hair. Taking turns sucking hard on each of her nipples, it 394/727

was clearly a weakness for Allison as her legs rustled as I sucked harder and harder.

Pulling her red tube top all the way down her waist, I kissed down the length of her soft flat stomach, flicking my tongue over her beautiful belly button and kissing my way back up to her breasts, stopping to suck on them some more and then moving upwards back to her mouth.

She gripped my ass in both of her hands as I kissed her. My dick was fully hard, bursting through my jeans and I knew she could feel it pressing against her.

I stopped kissing her to look into her eyes.

She looked up at me with the sweetest smile and just nodded, a silent affirmation for me to keep going.

With that, I kissed her harder, stopping suddenly as my hands developed a mind of their own, reaching down, pulling off her boots one by one, followed by her 395/727

skirt and then sliding the tube top down her legs.

I looked down at her naked body, covered only by the front of a nude colored lace thong, taking the beautiful view in again as her long hair lay messily across the pillow.

So fucking hot.

She looked at me with an intense longing and pulled my face into hers.

I struggled to unzip my jeans fast enough, pulling them down, leaving on my boxer briefs, which could barely contain my hard-on.

I don’t remember feeling this intense kind of longing for a woman ever before. All fearful thoughts about the repercussions of this were buried deep in the back of my mind. All that mattered in this moment was that Allison seemed to want me just as badly as I wanted her.

As she pulled my shirt over my head, I couldn’t wait to feel her skin to skin. I 396/727

pressed down onto her to feel her breasts against my chest as we grinded fast against each other. I thought I might fucking lose it then and there, feeling totally out of control and knew there was no turning back…so I took off my glasses.

CHAPTER 23

ALLISON

I had fantasized about this moment from the first time I laid eyes on him.

Feeling Cedric’s rock hard body rubbing against me in the flesh felt surreal.

Just a couple of months ago, this man was a mere dream, a pure fantasy for me.

Now, we were about to have sex.

His utterly perfect physique definitely made me self-conscious. I had truly never been with a man as gorgeous as Cedric, so chiseled and naturally tan, not a blemish on his skin. My body seemed to react uncontrollably to him and I wondered whether he could feel how wet I was becoming through my barely there underwear.

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My heart pounded against his chest as he pressed against me. His heart was pounding too and it excited me to know that he was as turned on as I was.

Sliding my hands down his back, I gripped his firm ass through his boxer briefs and he reacted with a moan, kissing me harder.

Suddenly I felt the slick tip of his bare, hard penis rubbing against my stomach…it seemed to have burst out of his underwear.

Jeez…there was definitely nothing lacking in that department.

Instinctively, I spread my legs apart.

Cedric’s moan vibrated down my throat and he began kissing down my torso stopping at the top line of my underwear.

Then, he went lower and started to kiss my inner thighs softly and I could swear that alone was going to make me lose it. He continued this for some time, starting down at my knees and trailing his tongue up to my 399/727

underwear line, stopping there at the top of my thighs and returning his kisses back down my leg again. One of the times, he pulled my underwear with his teeth, teasing me, as he licked me…everywhere but there.

My legs quivered and shook with the anticipation of what he was going to do next.

Just when I thought I was going to lose my mind, he ripped my thong apart pushing it down my legs, which I then wrapped around his back.

He looked at me with a wicked grin, nodding no and pushed my legs back down off of him and spread me apart, lowering his mouth downward. I felt his hot tongue invade me down there suddenly and fiercely, as I gripped his thick hair.

I rocked my pelvis in synch with the thrusts of his tongue and screamed out for a pleasure that I had literally never felt before.

Every time I would shriek, I could feel the vibration of Cedric’s moaning in response.

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He continued to devour me for minutes until I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted him inside of me, so I pulled his head up to mine and kissed him hard, pushing his boxer briefs down and opening my legs around him.

Feeling his hot erection against my stomach, I panted in frustration as he took turns sucking hard on each of my breasts.

This continued for minutes and I closed my eyes, gripping his hair, lost in the ecstasy of it.

Suddenly, the abrupt coldness of his absence hit me as he lifted off of me, reaching for his pants that were strewn on the floor. I heard the crinkle of a wrapper and lifted my neck to see him sheathing himself with a condom. Cedric looked down at me with glowing eyes and smiled, his chestnut hair, now a tousled mess. I couldn’t help but smile back at his beautiful face.

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“Are you sure you are ready for this?” he whispered, looking down at me longingly and rubbing my stomach with his big hands in slow circles.

I breathed out in a combination of frustration and ecstasy. “Yes, Cedric. I trust you.”

I meant it. I trusted him and had no doubts about what I was about to do.

He closed his eyes and inhaled slowly for a moment at my words, as if he was processing what I said. Was he having doubts? I couldn’t tell what he was thinking at that moment, but he seemed to be deep in thought and breathing erratically.

When he opened his eyes and stared into mine, I smiled back at him. After a few seconds, he exhaled, reached for my face and cupped my cheek, caressing it with his thumb. He stayed like this for a minute staring at me and then, never taking his eyes off mine, very suddenly lowered himself and 402/727

plunged into me deeply, claiming me, in one movement. The initial burn quickly turned into a euphoric feeling.

“Fuck…Allison,” Cedric whispered in-to my ear as we moved together slowly.

“Oh…God,” I said. Feeling this beautiful man inside me was truly the most amazing thing I had ever experienced. I didn’t know if it was because of the sheer size of him or because it had been a while for me, but he seemed to fill me completely, like it was my first time without the pain. It was just the most unbelievable feeling in the world.

I closed my eyes, never wanting this feeling to end and opened them to find Cedric staring into me intently. I don’t think his eyes ever left mine for even a moment. I held onto his back, pushing him deeper and deeper into me.

Cedric was whispering incoherently, but then I clearly heard what he said next.

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“I love…this…being inside you. You’re the most beautiful woman in the world,” he said huskily as he continued to rock into me, his eyes still firmly planted on mine, as we developed a rhythm.

“Aaaaaagh.” I moaned, not being able to respond with anything more coherent.

“God, I wish I could stay inside you forever.” Cedric panted and suddenly began thrusting harder and deeper than before.

With those last words and his change in pace, I could feel myself losing control, climaxing suddenly and unexpectedly. “Cedric, I am coming,” I said.

He seemed relieved to be able to let go. “Oh, God. Come, baby…I’m coming too…holy shit.” Cedric’s thrusts quickened as I felt his orgasm pulsating inside me while I climaxed.

As we both recovered from that Earth shattering

experience,

his

movements

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slowed. He stayed inside me and slowly kissed my neck.

I closed my eyes trying to relish every moment of being here with him like this. We stayed together silent for quite some time before Cedric spoke.

“That was amazing, Allison,” he whispered in my ear as he slowly pulled out of me. He turned over quickly and I heard him remove the condom and discard it.

I turned toward him with my head resting on my elbow. “Cedric, I am so glad you came home.”

“Me too,” he said as he pulled me closer to him and rested his forehead against mine. “You have no idea.”

CHAPTER 24

CEDRIC

I can’t believe I almost backed out of the most intense sex of my life. It was the moment I asked her if she was sure, when she told me she trusted me.

I trust you.

Hearing Allison say that really struck a cord and it was the only moment where I momentarily snapped out of the trance she put me in. I had closed my eyes beginning to doubt whether taking this step with her was a good idea and everything flashed before me…past, present and future.

By the time I opened my eyes again, the sheer power of her sweet face looking up at me crushed everything else and I buried it all again…by burying myself in her.

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Maybe I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if the guilt caught up again later, but it was a risk I was willing to take. It was worth it to experience making love to her.

Sex with her was different from all of the rest. I hadn’t ever experienced the feeling of wanting to completely possess someone and of wanting her to completely own me, to be so completely connected to the person, not just the act.

I had meant it when I said I wished I could stay inside her forever. All of my doubts seemed to disappear there. As long as we were connected, I knew I couldn’t lose her. This was the opposite of what I normally felt after sex, which was a feeling of wanting to run, where the connection ended with the orgasm.

It was now the middle of the night and Allison lay sleeping beside me rhythmic-ally breathing so peacefully.

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A moment ago, a terrifying dream had awakened me and relief replaced panic when I realized she was still lying next to me.

In the dream, Allison and I were walking in the park, when I suddenly started taunting her like a child in a sing-songy voice, repeating, ‘I know something you don’t know. I know something you don’t know’ over and over again. She had a terrified look on her face and then I woke up. The dream was brief, but just enough to make me sweat profusely and remind me how fucked up this was.

But, thankfully, for now, in reality, she was right here sleeping next to me like a baby. God, I loved hearing the sound of her breathing. I wished she could always be peaceful and that there were no secrets threatening to destroy that. I would inevitably take away that peace, but she had a right to know everything.


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