Текст книги "In Your Heart "
Автор книги: Micalea Smeltzer
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Текущая страница: 1 (всего у книги 20 страниц)
© Copyright 2015 Micalea Smeltzer
Smashwords Edition
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Cover design and photography by Regina Wamba at Mae I Design
Formatted By Ready, Set, Edit
TRACE + OLIVIA SERIES
Finding Olivia
Chasing Olivia
Tempting Rowan
Saving Tatum
SECOND CHANCES SERIES
Unraveling
Undeniable
WILLOW CREEK SERIES
Last to Know
Never Too Late
In Your Heart
STANDALONES
Beauty in the Ashes
Rae of Sunshine
“Music exists to speak the words we can’t express.”
—Unknown
I WAS GETTING married in two weeks.
I was getting married in two weeks and I was standing here watching my so-called fiancé stick his dick in a woman that wasn't me.
An inhuman shriek crawled out of my throat and I grabbed the first thing I could get my hands on which happened to be one of Braden’s baseball caps—granted, it wouldn’t do much damage, but at least it was something—and threw it at his bare back. He was already turning to look at me over his shoulder, his hips still thrusting against the skank beneath him, when the cap hit him.
“What the hell?” He glared at me.
At me, like I was the one doing something wrong.
“Excuse me?” I stormed forward. My whole body shook with barely contained rage.
Before I could reach them he stood up, wrapping the bed covers around his waist and leaving the woman in our bed lying there completely naked.
That was Braden for you, ever the gentlemen.
He held his hands up in a placating gesture. “Let’s talk about this, Sadie.”
“Yeah, let’s talk!” I screamed, waving a hand in the direction of the woman lying on my sheets. “Let’s talk about the fact that apparently you slipped and fell and your penis ended up in someone else’s vagina! Thank God she was there to break your fall!” I yelled sarcastically.
“It’s not what—”
I slapped him across the cheek. My hand left behind a red imprint on his skin. His teeth snapped together and he glared down at me.
“Don’t you fucking dare tell me it’s not what it looks like,” I shouted, my hands shaking at my sides.
The woman in our bed was still lying there. Why, I didn’t know. Maybe she thought I’d be kind enough to leave and let them finish.
As. Fucking. If.
“Sadie—”
He grabbed my arm and I screamed so loud that I was sure everyone in the apartment complex heard me. “Take your fucking hand off of me!!”
Braden, surprisingly, let me go. He took a step back and I swore his skin had paled a shade.
That’s right asshole, be afraid. Be very afraid.
I poked a finger into his chest—a chest I had once found to be a magnificent piece of masculine perfection.
“I can’t fucking believe you! After everything you’ve put me through you go and do this! Seriously?! What the fuck did I ever see in you?!” The words poured out of my mouth. I was beyond hurt and pissed off. This was the man I’d planned on spending the rest of my life with, the man I’d given up so many important things for, and here he was fucking another woman only weeks before our wedding.
It was comical really, the irony of it all, since he’d been convinced I was sleeping with my friend Ezra. I thought of all the ridiculous accusations Braden had lobbed my way, and I couldn’t help wondering if his own indiscretions led to his insecurity.
Hell, Braden had practically forced me to end my friendship with Ezra.
Why? Why had I been so blinded? When did I become this weak, sniveling excuse for a person that I let an asshole like him walk all over me? And why did it take me seeing him fucking someone else, to finally snap back into reality and realize what a complete asshole he was?
Fuck.
It was like I’d been brainwashed.
I tore at my hair, my breaths coming out in little gasps.
Anger at myself, at him, and at the bitch in my bed simmered dangerously in my veins. It wouldn’t take much for me to snap and lose my ever-loving mind.
“Sadie, let’s talk about this—”
“Should I get dressed?” The woman in our bed spoke up.
“Yes!” I screamed.
Her eyes widened and she slipped from the bed, looking around for her clothes.
With another scream I started for the kitchen.
“Where are you going?” Braden asked, trailing behind me.
He kept stopping to untangle his feet from the too-long sheet wrapped around his waist.
I wished he would trip and die.
“Sadie,” he started in again.
I opened one of the various drawers in the kitchen and pulled out a knife, waving it around like a crazy person.
He paled further.
“Sadie, put down the knife.”
“No!” I screamed. “I think I should cut your dick off so you can fuck yourself with it! Would that suffice?!”
Braden’s mouth fell slightly open.
He was afraid.
Good.
The asshole should be afraid for his life.
Or the life of his penis, which was really the most important thing to him.
“I’m calling 911!” I heard the woman shout from my bedroom.
“Go ahead, bitch!”
“Sadie, be reasonable,” Braden started.
I thrust the knife in his direction, flailing my arms about like I’d seen jousters do on TV. “Reasonable?! You want me to be reasonable?!”
“I’m a man, I have needs—”
“Oh for fuck’s sake!” I threw my hands up in the air. “Your needs? That’s seriously the excuse you’re using? Wow, you’re dumber than I thought.” Laughing manically, I cried, “Who am I kidding? I’m the dumb one for being with you.”
When I met Braden he’d been…perfect. I knew that sounded cliché, but it was true. He was everything I’d always wanted and more. He treated me nicely and was always a gentleman. Once things got serious he started changing. I chalked it up to the fact that he’d recently started a new job. When things got worse after our engagement I found every excuse possible to explain his behavior. I’d been so naïve.
Everybody had tried to warn me that something wasn’t right.
But I’d been blinded by…love?
No, that wasn’t the right answer.
I think I’d been more blinded by my own need not to be wrong.
It was like I felt by giving up on my relationship with Braden it was admitting defeat—admitting that everyone else had been right about him.
Look where that got you? My conscience piped in.
“Sadie.” He took a few steps forward.
“Stay away from me!” I jabbed the knife in his direction. I wasn’t really going to hurt him, but oh how I wanted to.
“Sadie, put the fucking knife down and let’s talk about this,” he pleaded.
I wiped the back of my hand over my tear stained face.
Why the fuck was I crying over this loser? He didn’t deserve a single tear from me.
“Talk about what?” I spread my arms wide. “The fact that I’ve wasted the last two years of my life with you? Or the fact that if I hadn’t caught you in the act I would be your wife in two weeks.” I shook my head, laughing under my breath. I began to slow clap. “Thanks for saving me the nightmare of divorce court, asshole.”
“We can work this out—”
“Work this out!” I shrieked, charging forward. “Are you fucking crazy? I am done with you!”
To further prove my point I pried off my engagement ring, throwing it at his head. He tried to catch it, dropping the sheet from around his waist in the process.
“You disgust me,” I spat through clenched teeth.
He hurried to grab the sheet to cover himself once more, as if I might charge forward and make good on my previous threat.
He opened his mouth to speak, but I stopped him.
“I swear to God, if you say my name one more fucking time I will cut off your tongue too!”
“Don’t worry, babe,” the slut from my bed strolled down the hall, dressed only in skimpy lingerie, “I called the police and I recorded everything she said on my phone.”
I gulped, suddenly not feeling so bold.
The evil glint in her eye told me I was in trouble.
She leveled me with a smirk. “I’m a lawyer,” she said the words slowly like I was too dumb to process them, “and this,” she waved her phone around, “is enough to get you arrested.”
Oh, fuck.
I steeled my shoulders, refusing to let the bitch know her words had gotten to me.
Braden glanced from her to me, not saying a word.
Two years together and the asshole couldn’t even come to my defense and tell the bitch that I hadn’t really meant anything by it. Heat of the moment and all that jazz.
Nope, he just stood there blinking like it was the only thing he was capable of doing.
My teeth gnashed together and I dropped the knife on the floor. I wanted to launch myself at the bitch with my claws out, but she’d already won.
Although, that was laughable, because apparently the prize was Braden and I could see now that he was hardly worth bragging rights.
She could have him.
And I would laugh when he cheated on her.
Because he would.
Men like him didn’t change.
I turned to Braden, my shoulders slumping with exhaustion. I’d been so wound up and now the air had left my sails. I was just…done. I wasn’t going to waste another breath yelling at him. Nothing I said would penetrate its way through his thick skull the way he penetrated his mistress. He definitely wasn’t worth it either. I’d been crazy to ever think he was the guy for me.
Sirens sounded outside the apartment building.
“I’ll go let them in.” The tramp smiled.
“Shouldn’t you go put some clothes on,” I snapped.
She looked down. “Oh, right.”
She disappeared back into the bedroom while Braden and I stood staring at each other. When she returned she was wearing my ripped shorts and my lavender tank top.
The calm defeat I’d felt a moment before instantly disappeared.
How dare she wear my clothes.
I screamed again, charging forward, and grabbed the bitch’s hair before Braden could stop me.
That’s when the cops knocked on the door.
From there, things escalated.
I scratched her.
She hit me.
I hit back.
She pulled my hair.
I bit her.
And then I got arrested.
Today was not my day.
I SAT ON the cold metal bench inside the holding cell, contemplating my life choices.
I wondered what shitty decision led me to this moment.
Was it when I attacked the bitch?
Or grabbed the knife?
Or when I first started dating Braden?
I was betting on the latter.
From the first moment I met him he screwed with my life and I let him, because I’d been dumb. There was no other explanation. I’d been so desperate to love someone that I’d tricked myself into thinking he was better than he was.
I kept going over and over in my head different things he’d said and done, and wondered why I’d always swept his behavior under the rug.
When did I become this girl that turned a blind eye?
I’d always spoken my mind, but with Braden I let him speak for me.
I put my head in my hands, letting out a small groan.
I wasn’t going to be that girl anymore. I was going to get my fire back and conquer the world.
Well, as soon as I got out of this jail cell.
Footsteps sounded on the concrete floors and I stood up, praying that they were coming to let me out.
A moment later a figure appeared.
He was tall and thin. He kept his head ducked down and his unruly black hair hid his face.
Slowly, he lifted his head to face me. His dark eyes were hidden behind a pair of round glasses and his cheeks and chin were covered in scruff like he hadn’t shaved in a week or more.
My breath caught on an embarrassing gasp.
It’d been six months since I’d seen him and he still took my breath away—not that I would ever tell him that.
Once upon a time I’d had a crush on Ezra Collins, but soon his friendship became too important to me to ever cross that line.
He tilted his head to the side, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.
“I thought I’d never hear from you again.” His eyes bore into me, hurt lacing his words. Chuckling, he added, “Let me tell you, I was quite surprised to answer the phone and hear your voice. Jail? Really, Sadie? What is it with you and Emma getting arrested?”
I lifted a finger. “That wasn’t her fault.” I reminded him. “This…” My lower lip began to tremble with the threat of tears. “This is all me.”
And that was the sad truth.
“What exactly happened?” He asked.
I stepped forward, wrapping my hands around the metal bars. “Do you think you can get me out of here first and then we can chat?”
“Oh, right.” He shook his head, pushing his too long hair out of his eyes. He cracked a small half smile. “They didn’t want to let me back here, but I had to see this for myself.”
I sighed, sitting back down on the bench with my hands splayed on my legs. “I’m glad you find this amusing, Ezra.”
He shook his head, his eyes growing serious once more. “I’m sorry.”
I flinched. I’d told him when I called that I caught Braden cheating on me.
“Why?” I found myself asking. “You hated him.”
“But I love you.” He paled, lifting his hands in surrender. “Not like that,” he added. “You’re my best friend, Sadie. I might’ve hated the asshole, but I still wanted you to be happy. This was the last thing I wanted to happen to you.”
“But you knew it would,” I whispered, looking away from him and staring at the cinderblock cell wall instead, “you warned me and I didn’t fucking listen.”
“You were in love.” He defended my actions.
I turned back towards him. “Was I?” I retorted. “Because I don’t know anymore.”
My shoulders sagged with my words. I didn’t think there had ever been a time in my life when I felt this defeated.
He frowned, his mouth twisting as he struggled with something to say. Finally he muttered, “I better go take care of this.”
“Yeah, that would be great,” I sighed. “I mean, this bench is nice and all, but I don’t really want to sleep here.”
He shook his head and walked back down the hall.
I felt bad that after six months with no communication this was what I called him for, but I knew I could count on him to bail me out.
My parent’s would have too, but frankly I wasn’t ready to tell them all the gory details.
Plus, my dad might kill Braden when I told him.
I knew Ezra would keep his cool, even if he probably did dream about maiming my ex-fiancé.
In fact, the last time I saw Ezra he punched Braden in the face.
Now, I wished I could go back and give Ezra a round of applause for that one.
It took a while, but eventually they released me.
Neither of us spoke as we walked out of the building. Ezra guided me through the parking lot and to his shiny black Cadillac Escalade.
As soon as we were both seated in the car I broke down in tears.
He didn’t say anything, which I was thankful for.
He reached for my hand, holding mine in his and offering the smallest amount of comfort that he could.
After a few minutes I wiped my face free of tears and he started the car.
He pulled away from the police station and I watched the trees and traffic go by.
“I don’t have anywhere to go,” I realized.
I’d moved into Braden’s place when we got engaged. At the time I’d still been living with my parents but they’d since downsized. I wouldn't have wanted to impose on them anyway.
I couldn’t stay with Emma either—my best friend since we were in diapers. She and her fiancé, Maddox—the drummer for Willow Creek, the band Ezra played in—still lived in the guesthouse behind his foster parent’s house. Maddox’s foster parents also happened to be Ezra’s real parents. They’d taken in Maddox and his twin brother Mathias when they were put into the system as teenagers. Maddox and Ezra were close, like brothers, while Mathias had always remained distant. That seemed to be changing though, according to things Emma had told me. Apparently, since Mathias rekindled with his high school love, Remy, and subsequently married her, he’d stopped distancing himself from his brother and band mates. They were also having a baby. Mathias Wade as a dad…I definitely hadn’t seen that one coming.
“You’ll stay with me.” Ezra said simply, his eyes on the road ahead.
I shook my head. “No.” My voice was firm. “I can’t impose myself on you like that. I won’t,” I reiterated.
He glanced at me and then his eyes went back to the road. “You’re not imposing. You’re my friend and I’m doing you a favor.”
“I don’t want any favors,” I ground out between my teeth, “this was enough.” I added, referring to him bailing me out of jail.
“Yeah, care to explain the details to me? Seriously, what the fuck did you do to get arrested?”
I swallowed thickly and looked out the window once more. I could see my reflection in the glass. My lips were turned down in a frown and my light brown hair hung limply.
“I grabbed a knife and told him I was going to cut off his dick and then I threatened to cut off his tongue too. The bitch he was cheating on me with happened to be a lawyer. She recorded the whole thing and it was enough for them to arrest me.” I shrugged, playing it off. “Can you believe that?”
I glanced at him. A muscle in his jaw twitched and I knew he was irritated. Not at me, but at the situation.
“It’s like the world is conspiring against me,” I muttered, picking at the tear in my ripped jeans. “No, not conspiring…it’s laughing at me. At how completely fucking stupid I am.” I shook my head back and forth, swallowing past the lump in my throat. Tears stung my eyes once more. “I hate myself so much right now.”
“Don’t,” Ezra snapped, his tone harsh as he spared me a glance, “don’t fucking say that.”
“But I do.”
“Everybody makes mistakes, Sadie,” he interjected, turning down a street and heading out of town.
“I was going to marry him.” My voice cracked. “I was going to marry an asshole that treated me like shit, who cheated on me, and who just isn’t a very nice fucking person, and why?”
His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. His lips pursed as his tongue rolled around, searching for the right words. “I don’t know,” he answered.
“Yeah?” I laughed, but there was no humor in the tone. “Me either.” I buried my head in my hands and let out a small scream. “Why didn’t I listen to you? Why didn’t I listen to any of you? Everybody warned me against him.”
“You’re stubborn,” he responded, his voice flat.
“Yeah,” I agreed, “and look where that got me. I’m now fiancé-less and homeless. I’m such a role model.”
His lips twisted. “Now’s not the time for your sarcasm.”
“Are you mad at me?” I asked, hating that I sounded hurt. But I was. Hurt, that is. He had every right to be mad at me though. I mean, what kind of crappy friend calls a person up because they’re in jail and then doesn’t even have a place to stay?
“Yes, I am mad at you,” he replied, “but not for the reason you think.”
He always did know me so well, like he could read my mind. We’d only become friends when our best friends fell in love four years ago. They were so enamored with each other that we both ended up being left out. We started hanging out and bonded, soon becoming best friends ourselves. The last six months without Ezra in my life had sucked, to put it bluntly, but Braden was my fiancé so I thought I was doing the right thing by cutting Ezra out of my life since that’s what Braden wanted. Little did I know that was simply another way he was manipulating me.
“So, why exactly are you mad at me?” I asked.
“Because,” he took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, “you’re acting like this is your fault. You’re not the one that cheated, Sadie.”
“But I’m the one that stayed with an asshole for no good reason. I mean,” I pushed my hair away from my face, “I don’t feel like I ever really loved him…if I did I would feel more hurt, right?” I asked him. “Because that’s not what I feel, instead—”
“Your ego is bruised,” he supplied, turning down another road. Farmland stretched as far as I could see as he drove to his house.
“Exactly,” I agreed, nodding.
“I think you wanted to believe he was the one for you,” he glanced at me for a moment, his dark eyes serious, “but he wasn’t.”
“Maybe I’m meant to be alone for the rest of my life,” I mused, “with like fifty cats.”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re twenty-one. You have plenty of time to find the guy for you.”
“I think I’m just going to become a nun.” I nodded, affirming my words.
He snorted and I glared at him. “I think it’s a bit late for that.”
I crossed my arms over my chest, the seatbelt digging into my collarbone. “I’m glad you find amusement in my suffering.”
“Don’t be like that.” He chuckled. “Think about all that you’ve accomplished. You own your own store, Sadie. That’s a big deal. Be proud of yourself. Focus on that and not trying to find a guy to settle down with.”
“I wanted so desperately to be in love,” I confessed. “Real, soul deep, shaking in the knees, forever, kind of love.”
“You’ll have that one day,” he assured me.
I sighed heavily. “But not now.”
He shook his head and took my hand once more, giving it a reassuring squeeze before letting go. “This is a good thing. You’re going to be a stronger person because of this.”
“I hope so,” I agreed.
I knew I was better off without Braden, and I hated that it had taken this to get me to see that. But it still hurt. I’d spent two years of my life with him, and there had been good memories with him. I stayed with him for stupid reasons, and I was mad at myself for that. I’d given up so much for an ideal I’d conjured up in my mind of what my life was supposed to be like. I would not let this break me. Nope.
Oh God, was I crying again?
I tentatively reached up and there were more tears.
Shit. So much for not letting this break me.
Ezra turned onto the driveway leading up to his house. Although, calling it a house was a stretch. His home was small, more like a cottage. I’d been there plenty of times before…well, before. It was cute and nestled between shady trees with a lake in the back. There were also no other houses close, which I knew was a big draw for Ezra. Seclusion from nosy people and the media was highly coveted among the Willow Creek boys.
He parked the SUV in the detached garage he’d had built to match the house. Both were covered in dark blue siding with white shutters beside the windows. I’m sure most people expected a rock star like Ezra to live in a mansion, but that’d never been what he wanted. I admired him, and the other guys too, for not letting fame go to their heads. Not that they didn’t love their shiny toys, like their various cars.
He turned the vehicle off and sighed into the silence.
“How about I make some dinner? Fettuccine?”
I flinched. Fettuccine Alfredo was my favorite meal. Ezra knew that, but that was something Braden could never remember.
“I’m not very hungry,” I muttered, reaching for the door handle.
Before I could slip out of the vehicle he grabbed my arm, halting me. “Don’t let him win.” His eyes bored into me, burning me with their seriousness.
“I’m not,” I argued.
“That’s exactly what you’re doing,” he snapped. “He’s not worth it.”
I sighed, scrubbing a hand over my face. “Ezra,” I huffed, “this just happened. I think I’m allowed a day to wallow over the complete shit-fest that is my life.”
His lips quirked into a small smile and he ducked his head. Releasing my arm, he sobered. “Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry too,” I whispered, a frown turning down my lips. He gave me a quizzical look so I quickly explained. “I’m sorry for throwing away our friendship like it meant nothing to me. I was wrong to do that.”
“You felt like you had to.” He sighed heavily. Shaking his head, his black curls tumbled forward to hide his gaze. “I’d be lying if I said that didn’t hurt, especially since Braden is such a prick,” his teeth ground together, “but it was your life and I couldn’t force myself to be a part of it. So, I let you go.”
“And yet, you didn’t let me spend the night in jail. It’s what I deserved.”
He stared at me for a moment. The intensity in his dark eyes rooted me to the spot. “I’ll always have your back.”
I lowered my head, feeling forlorn. Ezra was much too kind to me.
“You should hate me,” I breathed, my words hanging heavily in the air.
He grasped my chin, forcing me to look at him. His eyes seared into me as he spoke. “Friendship doesn’t work like that. I could never hate you for making the decision that you did.”
“Even if it was the wrong one?”
His fingers momentarily tightened against my chin and anger pulsed in his brown eyes. “For you, it was the right decision at the time. Life is a series of choices that we make, some of them are good, and some of them are not, but everything always works out in the end. Things will be better now, you’ll see.”
He released his hold on me and I looked away with a sigh. “Better,” I repeated. “I hope so.”
“I know so.” He reiterated with a smile. “Everything happens for a reason, Sadie. Sometimes we don’t understand why, but eventually we look back and can see that everything worked out.”
“I think it already has,” I whispered.
He nodded at my words, processing them. “Come on,” he reached for the car door handle, “let’s eat. I’m starving.”
This time at the mention of food my stomach came to life.
I climbed out of the large SUV and followed the gravel pathway over to the front porch steps.
He pulled out his house key and swung the door open.
“After you.” He waved a hand.
I stepped inside the cottage and immediately felt an overwhelming sense of comfort. The home was decorated with the coastal colors of navy and white. The floors were a dark hardwood that shined as if they’d just been cleaned. The family room sat to my left with a white couch and chair, with blue and gray throw pillows.
Across from the family room sat the kitchen. It had white cabinets with concrete countertops. The appliances were shiny stainless steel. It was a work of art, and almost looked untouched, but I knew that Ezra wasn’t that kind of guy. He actually enjoyed cooking. His mom had made sure that he, Maddox, and Mathias, all knew how to cook and not just microwave frozen pizza rolls like most guys.
Beside the kitchen was a small table with four chairs, but the area wasn’t large enough to be considered a dining room.
The downstairs also had a small powder room and the laundry room—the laundry room being an addition Ezra had insisted on since the home didn’t have one when he moved in.
Upstairs there were two bedrooms and a shared bathroom.
Straight ahead lay a pair of French double doors that led out to a large deck overlooking the lake. I knew if I went out there he would have several rocking chairs lined up, a grill, and a fire pit. The view of the lake, and the deck, had been one of the things Ezra loved the most about this place.
He’d dragged me to various homes during his house hunt. That seemed like a lifetime ago even though it hadn’t been more than three years.
“You act as if you’ve never seen the place before.” He chuckled, noticing my lingering stare.
I lifted my shoulders in a shrug and gave him a small smile. “I missed this place.”
He beamed at my words. “Yeah?”
I nodded. “This has always been one of my favorite places.”
I always felt at peace here. I didn’t know why. Maybe it was the fact that the home was so cozy and welcoming, or maybe it was the breathtaking view of the lake. Or maybe it was simply because this was where my best friend lived, and being near him filled me with a sense of security.
“You can stay here as long as you need,” he said, moving into the kitchen. He began to rifle through cabinets, setting out pots.
I wrapped my arms around my body, as if I could hold myself together. “Thanks,” I forced a smile. I hated intruding on Ezra’s space, but I was truly thankful for his kindness. Especially after the last six months with no contact. Without him…I didn’t know where I would stay. I couldn’t afford my own place right now.
He flicked a piece of dark hair out of his eyes. “Want to help?” He asked me.
I nodded, stepping around to the other side of the counter beside him. He quickly gave me instructions and I went to work.
We laughed and joked as we cooked, slipping into our once familiar roles as best friends. God, I’d missed this. Ezra might not have been my friend for as long as Emma—who I had known since we were babies—but our bond was just as strong. Sometimes I even felt like it was stronger.
We fixed the table and sat down across from each other to eat.
“So,” I started, picking up my fork, “how was the tour?”
Willow Creek had been on a tour across the United States since January. They’d only been home a few weeks.
“Good,” Ezra nodded. “Tiring, but fun. It was nice to get back out there and play on stage, but I’m also ready to get back in the studio.”
“So, you guys are already working on the next album?” I swirled the noodles around and then took a bite. “Oh my God,” I moaned, “that’s delicious.”
Ezra smiled at my words. “I’m glad you like it.”
“It’s certainly better than a restaurant.”
He’d made the sauce from one of his mom’s recipes and it was as good as I remembered.
“To answer your question,” he reached for a wine bottle, filling each of our glasses, “yes we’re already working on it.”
“Do you guys ever sleep?”
He choked on a laugh. “No, not very much.”
“You all have lots of dedication,” I told him.
He tipped his glass in my direction. “So do you.”
Me?” I snorted. “No.”
He clasped his fingers together, studying me like I was some fascinating specimen. “I don’t know how you can dismiss your accomplishments so easily.”
“They don’t feel like accomplishments when I’m currently homeless.”
He set his glass down, crossing his fingers together. “You’re too hard on yourself. Why?”
It was a simple question, one I should’ve been able to answer, but I couldn’t.
“I think,” he continued when I didn’t speak, “that you need to focus more on your accomplishments and less on your failures.” He slowly raised the glass to his lips.
I sighed, taking another bite of fettuccine to stall for time. “I’ll get right on that.”
He shook his head, fighting a smile. I expected him to call me on my sarcasm like he usually did, but he didn’t.
“You know,” he said, “when I met you, you were…” He paused, his lips twisting as he searched for the right words. “So vibrant,” he settled on, “and from the moment you got with Braden I’ve had to watch him strip your identity from you. You went from this carefree girl to this…shell. It’s like you’re a stranger.”
