Текст книги "All of Me"

Автор книги: Kelly Moran

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

chapter

nine

Alec sighed and stared down at his cell. He’d managed to avoid Faith for two days, but Cole’s text would make that difficult to keep up.

About to board the plane to Cozumel. Mia is a mess. Can you keep an eye on Ginny and Faith while Jake is working? Just pop in once in a while. Thanks, man.

Jake’s text followed two minutes later.

Mom asked about you again. Go visit.

He scrubbed his hands over his face and rested the back of his head on the chair. He’d written nothing new for his book, guilt clawed at his stomach for how he’d handled Jake the other night, and he wanted to see Faith more than he wanted his next cup of coffee. He’d rationalized this desire with her ability to get him to write, but yeah . . .

He wanted to finish that kiss. He wanted to follow Jake’s advice and see where things led. He wanted his head back in the book. But none of those things were happening, so he got dressed and headed to his parents’ cozy ranch house in a suburb near the county line.

His memories of the house weren’t unpleasant. Their yard was still the most beautiful, manicured one on the street. Even though Dad was retired, the landscaper in him still sought perfection. Holly berry bushes lined the front walk from the driveway to the front stoop. Lilies and dahlias mingled in a couple flower beds. Geraniums and marigolds in potted baskets hung from the fascia. There wasn’t a dandelion in sight. Even the white aluminum siding was pristine.

His mother never had that kind of precision, except in the kitchen. If it involved baked goodness, she was an expert. But she was too even-tempered to be anything but pleasant. When Dad harped on Alec for staring off into space, making up a poorly fabricated story to get out of trouble, or failing math, it had been Mom who came to his rescue.

He’d come back home at Christmas. Before that, it had been a little more than a year since he’d seen them. Plenty of time for his dad to come up with some new teasing quips about his chosen profession. Millions of fans worldwide, and he couldn’t get his own dad to read one of his books.

The screen door slammed shut with a clap, and he looked up to find his mom’s warm smile. Her blond hair was cut in a shorter bob since he’d seen her last and she’d rounded out some.

“You’re home.” She opened her arms, wiggling her fingers when he didn’t step forward right away.

He closed the distance and accepted her embrace, bending nearly in half to stoop to her height. She still smelled like flour. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too. Come inside. How long are you staying in Wilmington?”

“Until Jake ties the knot.”

Her grin was something special and drowning in delight. “Can you believe it? I’m so excited.”

“I never would’ve guessed.”

He followed her through the foyer and toward the back of the house, breathing in the familiar scent of lemon dusting spray. He stopped short at the sight of Dad at the kitchen table, reading the newspaper. It was rare growing up to find him anywhere but the yard when he was actually home. The wrinkles on his face had deepened, but his skin was the bronze Alec remembered. Reading glasses were perched at the end of his wide nose. A new addition.

“Well, hey, son.” He rose and clapped him on the back.

“Hi, Dad.” With that pleasantry out of the way, he turned back to his mother, who was busy pouring sun tea.

“You’re not at all concerned Jake’s marrying a Covington?” Alec asked. Sure, the Covington dynamic had changed a great deal over the past year, and Alec was pretty certain Lacey loved his brother to the moon and back, but she was still a Covington and the Winstons were just the help.

The newspaper hit the table with a crack, but there was no anger in the gesture. “Why? He’s not being forced into it. Not everyone weds because they’re stupid enough to knock a girl up. Right, son?” He barked out a laugh at his own joke.

Direct hit. Score one for Dad.

Alec waved his hand, even though the barb hurt. They all did, not that his dad noticed. He might stroke out if his father ever thought about what he said before it spewed from his mouth. No filter, his dad. He’d never had one. Alec didn’t have enough fingers and toes to count the number of times his father had embarrassed him growing up.

Alec sat across from his father and studied the ancient yellow linoleum. The counters and cabinets dated back to the year the house was built. He was pretty sure the appliances did, too.

“Lacey’s a sweetheart,” Mom chirped. “We’re so happy for them. Aren’t we, Gregory?”

Dad nodded. “Jake could do worse for himself.”

Alec tried for neutral ground so he wouldn’t set his dad off on any new tangents. “The yard looks nice.”

Pride filled his father’s smile. “Hard work pays off—not that you’d know about that, with your apartment penthouse in the city. Probably hire maids to clean for you, too.”

Alec pinched the bridge of his nose. “I do work, you know. Books don’t write themselves.”

“True, true.”

Mom cleared her throat. “Are you hungry, honey?”

“No,” they both answered in unison.

She sliced some banana bread anyway.

Dad went back to his newspaper as if Alec wasn’t there, sipping the tea Mom had set out for him. Even as a child, his father had never seemed to know what to say to him, so this was nothing new.

Home sweet home.

His mom finished slicing the bread and reached into a drawer. She set the entire loaf in foil and handed it to Alec. “To eat while you’re writing. I’m so proud of you.”

That made one of them.

She went on and on for the next twenty minutes about how the local libraries had his books in stock, the weather, the neighbors, and by the time he tuned her out, she was on a kick about knitting.

When she paused to come up for air, he cut in. “I have to go soon. I’m on a deadline.”

The disappointment in her eyes cut. “I wish we could see you more often. It was good you stopped by.”

“I’ll be around this summer. I’ll visit.”

Alec wrapped her in a hug, squeezing until she squeaked. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

“Make him take you out to dinner tonight.” He jerked his chin toward his dad.

Confusion sparked in her blue eyes. “For what occasion?”

Alec shrugged. “Who says you need one? Do it just because.”

The newspaper came down again. “Waste of money when we have food right here. Unless you’re buying, Mr. Fancy Writer.”

“Take your wife out on a date,” Alec ground through clenched teeth. Try as he may to remember his father meant well and was harmless, his patience was wearing thin.

Dad wasn’t done, though. “Good one, son. What would you know about taking care of a wife?” He snorted out a full belly laugh before he finally realized no one else was laughing.

Except his dad was so fucking right. Even though they’d never actually gotten to tie the knot, Alec hadn’t taken care of Laura, and look how she’d wound up. A vegetable, being fed through a tube, with machines doing her breathing for her.

Nausea rolled in his gut. He closed his eyes and sucked in a breath. Shook his head.

When he finally could speak his voice sounded like sandpaper. “I gotta go. Love you guys.”

His father stood and wrapped his arms around Alec, the scent of cut grass surrounding him as he squeezed the air from his lungs. “Love you, too, son.”

*   *   *

The blunt knock on the kitchen door caused Faith to jump. She’d been staring off into space again, thinking about Alec and why he’d kissed her, instead of listening to Ginny read like she was supposed to be doing. Thinking how darn good it felt when he’d cupped her cheek and brushed his lips over hers. Going so long without another’s touch had obviously muddled her brain.

And Alec hadn’t come by since.

Wow. She’d never been one for daydreaming before. This place was either growing on her or changing her. Maybe both. She didn’t know how to feel about that. Daydreaming led to false hope and unrealistic versions of the truth. She’d set goals in her life, sure, but they were attainable ones.

Alec wasn’t attainable.

When she opened the door, he stood on the other side, looking like a gentle breeze could knock him over. Dark circles were forming under his eyes and his hair stood at odd angles. Yet he still looked so good. Too handsome and rough around the edges for her to ignore the punch.

“Are you okay?” He didn’t look right. She resisted the urge to smooth her hands over his thick black hair and across his shadowed jaw.

“No.” If his face was any indication, he was just as surprised by the admission. “Am I interrupting?”

She looked over her shoulder at the table. “Ginny was just reading to me. Come in.”

Ginny bounced in her seat. “Hi, Alec!”

He stepped inside and surveyed the room, not seeming to take anything in. “Hey, Ginny. Whatcha reading?”

Faith waited for Ginny to finish answering, the worry eating at her stomach lining. “Ginny, why don’t you head into the living room for a break? You can have an hour of TV, okay?”

“Yeah!”

The second Ginny was out of earshot, Faith turned to Alec. “Is it Lacey or Jake? Did something happen?”

“No, no.” He waved his hand. “I’m sorry. It’s me. I . . .”

Drawing in a calming breath, she sat at the table and waited him out. He leaned against the island and crossed his ankles, his palms clutching the counter behind him. The position made the blue tee he wore stretch over the taut muscles of his chest and arms. He was a magnificently built man. Part of his charisma was his confidence, which he seemed to be lacking at the moment. The urge to ask him what the problem was grew fierce, but he’d come here for a reason, so she let him work it out on his own.

He sighed and swiped a hand down his face. Rubbed his jaw. “I feel like shit for what happened the other night. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

This, exactly this, was why she didn’t daydream. Because envisioning someone like him wanting her was dangerous to her heart. She knew better. Her family and previous encounters had taught her well.

She forced her tone to be even, not wanting him to feel guilty, while lead sat heavy in her stomach. “It was spur of the moment. Nothing to beat yourself up over.”

Slowly, his gaze lifted to hers. Held. “It wasn’t spur of the moment. I’ve wanted to kiss you since I first saw you on the beach.” He straightened suddenly, those black eyebrows drawing together. Anger flared in his eyes. “Don’t do that. Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” Like the floor had just dropped out from under her? Like the room was spinning? Like every molecule in her body was exploding? Because it was. Her heart wouldn’t stop pounding.

“You look like no one’s ever said they wanted to kiss you before. The simplest things put this . . . this light in your eyes. I’m not capable of keeping that light there. I’m not in a position where I can offer more.”

He got all this from one kiss? He was more a dreamer than she was, then. She’d never been in a long-term relationship. This was uncharted territory for her. Not that anything resembling a relationship was happening between them. Even if it were, he’d just slammed on the brakes.

“It was just a kiss.” She didn’t know if she said that for him or herself.

He shook his head. “I don’t know what to make of you.”

Suddenly, it hit her. This seemed like classic projection. He was deflecting. She wasn’t the type of woman who got men sexually frustrated, so something else was triggering this argument and making him feel guilty. “Did something else happen today?”

“That is exactly what I’m talking about!” He paced the length of the kitchen and back, finally settling on the other side of the island as if needing a barrier. “You and your clever little mind and pretty eyes that see everything. You know things without me having to say a word.” He blew out a gust of air and slapped his hands on the counter, leaning into them.

Dang it. He said the nicest things sometimes, contradicting them with a voice that was wholly pissed off. He didn’t know what to make of her?

“You think my eyes are pretty?” She hadn’t really meant to say that aloud, but that’s what her mind chose to fixate on—the compliment. Her face heated to blazing.

He pinned her with a duh look. His shoulder muscles bunched with tension and the little tick in his jaw was back. He needed a stiff drink. So did she.

She had to redirect this conversation.

“Well, that settles it. You like my eyes, you don’t understand me, and you kiss me with deep regret. We must get married at once.” Lord, what had gotten into her?

He stilled a split second before he laughed. Long and deep and jagged.

Wow. She could listen to that all day. He obviously didn’t do it nearly enough because the sound was rusty in the quiet kitchen.

She waited a few beats for her pulse to level out. “Now that you’re feeling better, what really had you knocking on the door?” She rested her elbow on the table and her chin in her palm.

It was as slow as the sunrise, but it eventually came: heat replaced the humor previously in his eyes. “You make me want to kiss you again. Really kiss you, not like the half-assed one the other night. A knock-you-off-your-feet kind of kiss.”

Only a writer . . .

God, fire roared through her veins just thinking about it, though. No one had ever spoken to her like that before.

“Since you didn’t enjoy it the first time—”

“I didn’t say I didn’t enjoy it.” He ran a hand through his hair. Shook his head. “I went to see my folks today. My dad has a special talent for making me feel like shit, even though he doesn’t mean to. That’s what’s bothering me.”

Parental issues. To this she could relate. “That’s too bad. It’s probably his own insecurity showing.”

“If it’s one thing my dad isn’t, it’s insecure. He just doesn’t think before he speaks. He lacks the tact gene.”

Faith decided to change the subject. “Are you still doing well on the book? You had gotten pretty far—”

“No. I stalled.”

And there it was. The real reason he was here. It had nothing to do with kissing her or the visit with his parents. Those things were temporary, irritating distractions to someone like him. Alec saw her as some kind of fix for his writer’s block. It was the only thing of real interest he saw in her. She should’ve known better.

She nodded and rose. “Wait here. I’ll be right back.”

Faith printed off a form in Cole’s office and collected Ginny from the living room. She sat both Ginny and Alec at the kitchen table and handed Alec a pencil. She slid the book Ginny had just finished toward the waiting teenager.

“Ginny, Alec’s going to help you do your book report. Take all the time you need.” To Alec, she said, “Don’t take off if you get an idea. Let me know you’re leaving first.”

Faith didn’t look at Alec again when she left the room, because she was pretty sure the tears welling would spill if she did. Instead, she walked up the stairs to collect Ginny’s math book for later and allow a minute to collect herself.

chapter

ten

“I thought maybe we could go over some wedding ideas.” Lacey’s eyes were rounded in excitement, and she clutched several bridal magazines to her chest.

Ginny bounced on her feet. “Can we? Can we?”

“Sure.” Faith let Lacey inside the front door and followed them into the living room.

She’d gone the whole of her life never being asked her opinion or advice, and now it seemed everyone wanted a piece of her. Part of her was grateful to be included. The other part warned how temporary this place and these people were. Eventually Ginny wouldn’t need a tutor and Faith would have to move on. The rest of them would remain close, as friends or family, but Faith was just a momentary person.

“I tagged some bridesmaid dresses. You can tell me what color you like, Ginny.”

“I’ll leave you guys alone for a bit.”

“No, stay. I want your opinion, too. Please,” Lacey urged when Faith hesitated.

“Shouldn’t you be doing this with Mia? Maybe you should wait until she gets back.” After all, they were sisters-in-law and friends. What did Faith know about this stuff?

“Oh, there’s plenty to do. But August will be here soon, and the dresses take the longest to order.”

“Okay,” she sighed, sitting on the couch next to her. Ginny flanked her other side.

For the next two hours, they went over colors and styles. Lacey decided to let Ginny and Mia pick out their own instead of going with matching dresses. Faith liked that idea, allowing them their own individuality.

Lacey wasn’t who Faith had expected. With the money and power the Covingtons had, Faith had anticipated a royal snob who ordered her minions around, like her former students and their families at St. Ambrose. Lacey wasn’t like that at all. She was warm and kind and funny in a subdued sort of way. She seemed to just be coming out of her shell after being under her mother’s thumb all those years, and just starting to figure out who she was as a person. Faith could relate to her random insecurities. In a way, they had a lot in common.

After going over tuxedo options—and Faith imagining how good Alec would look in one—Faith stood. Bea was off this week with Mia and Cole out of town, so she needed to get lunch started.

“Would you like to stay for lunch?”

“Oh, I can’t. I have to meet with the caterer while Jake takes his lunch break. Maybe some other time. We can go shopping?”

“Sure. I’d like that,” Faith said, surprised she meant it.

Lacey turned to Ginny with a smile. “I’ll see you for our sleepover party tomorrow night.”

“Yeah!”

When Lacey left, Faith made some quick sandwiches and a salad for her and Ginny, but after lunch the girl was restless and bursting with energy. Faith was just about crawling out of her skin, too. She couldn’t pinpoint just what was wrong, except that Alec hadn’t been over in two days. The book report must’ve helped.

She smiled, pride welling inside that she’d been able to help him work through it. The lack of productivity had obviously bothered him.

Rubbing her forehead, she watched Ginny squirm in her seat and doing anything but her math problems. Math wasn’t Faith’s favorite, either.

“You know what, Ginny girl? Let’s quit for today.”

“Yeah!”

Faith grinned and closed the workbook with a snap. “Come on. Let’s go work the ants out.” She laughed at Ginny’s confusion. “Figure of speech. It’ll be fun. I promise.”

They headed into the living room where they went through the CD collection by the stereo. Ginny picked out a dance mix, which Faith set in the tray. A booming pop song mixed with a retro beat filled the room. Not her first choice, but Ginny loved it.

“Now what?” Ginny said.

“Now we dance.”

Since no one else was around to hear them, Faith turned the music to blasting and grabbed the girl’s hands. Ginny laughed and threw her head back, spinning and swaying. Faith picked up Ginny’s crazy rhythm and followed along.

*   *   *

Alec hadn’t slept more than four hours in two days, but hell if he’d ever felt better in his life. The words flowed. Chapter after chapter. Through the night, bleeding into the day. He was back. Sanity maintained.

Leaning back in his chair, he grinned and scrubbed his hands over his face. He should keep going, in case he lost this tangible thread, but his stomach rumbled and he was pretty sure he smelled.

He threw a frozen pizza into the oven and went to shower while it baked. Thoughts scrambled for purchase in his head as he stood under the spray. Plots morphed and characters screamed. Grabbing a bar of soap, the manuscript played out in his head until the end while he lathered.

The book was not coming out exactly how he’d first charted it in his timeline. Instead, the female lead was quickly becoming the heroine. The Nightmare demon had kidnapped her, and her brother searched in vain, losing a bit of his own self along the way. But it was the girl who broke free and escaped, using her own hidden strength and wit. Alec was about halfway through the manuscript, about to reach the peak where everything crumbled to shit and Nightmare grew fierce with fury. This part of writing a book was always a rush like no other. The exact moment when he knew conflict collided with action and the reader would be glued to the page, hanging on to every word.

Stepping out of the shower, he dried off, dressed, and headed to the kitchen, head still in the story. He’d have to rework books two and three to accommodate this change. If he kept the childhood tie between the three female victims, he could keep the motive behind Nightmare’s desire for them. Instead of the brother saving them, though, Faith would do it.

Alec’s head reared back and the slice of pizza fell from his fingertips to the counter. Christ, he hadn’t even realized he’d been eating. Half the pepperoni pie was devoured.

Faith.

She’d wormed her way into his head, under his skin. He’d based his female lead off her physically and emotionally. Wavy brown hair and quizzically sad eyes. Quiet strength, brilliant mind. Because of her, he’d been writing again. And holy shit, it was the best book he’d ever punched out. Even not having finished yet, he knew. This story was different. Girl power. Danger. A little romance. Fear unlike anything in his previous series.

All due to Faith.

Jake was right. She was different than the others. Not a distraction, but a destination. Part of him wanted to grasp that shred of hope for a future, for something permanent and real. Try his hand at normal again. But that wasn’t possible and never would be.

Still . . . she stayed there, trapped in his mind as a maybe. As potential. Alec shook his head and tossed the leftover pizza in the fridge.

He absolutely shouldn’t go over there and see her. It wasn’t fair to Faith to ping-pong back and forth between brooding and flirting. So far, he’d kept himself in check. But if he kept drawing himself toward the temptation of her, he’d do nothing but tear apart her life the way he’d done to Laura. Faith was kind. She was devoted to helping others, and genuinely enjoyed it.

And for the love of God, what was it about her? What was the damn draw? She wasn’t a gorgeous supermodel with pouty lips. She didn’t even wear makeup most of the time. Her body didn’t sport curvy hips and a full chest. In fact, she was so damn wispy thin he could probably bench-press her with one arm. Half the time she didn’t seem to want him around. She’d brushed off that kiss instead of trying to rope him into a marriage proposal like every other woman he’d encountered.

So, yeah. What the hell?

Still worked up into a mild irritation, he lifted his hand to knock on the front door and froze. He sighed with dramatic flair into the humid afternoon heat. Whatever. So she was on his mind and he’d unconsciously walked over. It meant nothing.

Music boomed from inside the house, all but rattling the windows. That wasn’t like her. In fact, every time he’d popped by, the house had been quiet. She and Ginny were usually working on some lesson or baking something. They’d never hear the bell or a knock over this racket, though.

Testing the knob, he found the door unlocked. He strode in and made his way toward the living room where the noise seemed to originate. What he found had his jaw dropping.

Ginny and Faith were . . . dancing. If you could call what they were doing dancing. Ginny was jumping up and down, bobbing her head to the beat. Faith had her arms up, swaying her hips. Her eyes were closed and her cheeks flushed. The blue top she wore rose up to show a patch of pale skin near her navel.

Damn it. Just when he thought he had her nailed, understood her a measurable amount, he walked in to find this.

“Hi, Alec!” Ginny called.

Faith squealed, grabbing her chest and nearly falling. She went to the stereo and killed the power, blessedly silencing the noise. Sweat trickled down her temple and dampened her hair, curling the tendrils. Her chest heaved, drawing his gaze there.

“I wasn’t expecting you.”

“No kidding.”

“We were just getting some energy out.”

He had some ideas on more pleasurable ways of doing that. “Did it work?”

Ginny giggled as if reading his mind.

“I don’t suppose there’s any way you can unsee that?” Faith asked, a half smile curving her lips. No, her lips weren’t pouty. They were thin and naturally a dark pink, the bottom lip slightly more full than the top.

“Not a chance.” In fact, a sudden vision of her sweating with flushed cheeks for an entirely different reason came to mind.

“I figured.” She wiped her brow with her forearm. “Ginny, why don’t you go change into your bathing suit? We’ll go for a quick swim.”

“Yeah!” She bounded past Alec and up the stairs.

Alec kept his attention on Faith—as if there was any other choice.

She fidgeted. “Stuck with the book again? Do you need help to get going?”

“No.”

Surprise had her brows lifting and those honey eyes widening. “Oh. Why are you here?”

Christ. As if the only reason someone would pay her a visit was because they needed something. Just who in her life had given her that theory? “I don’t know. To see you.”

Great. Honesty. So much for keeping her at arm’s length.

“Oh.” Again with the oh.

“Go out with me tonight.”

The words were out of his mouth before his brain could warn him of the stupidity. Guess he had a lot of his dad in him after all. She was the type of woman a guy had to woo. Not the kind you met in a bar and had horizontal in under twenty minutes. He wondered if he even knew how to do this anymore. It had been a long, long time.

Her mouth opened and closed several times before he decided to clarify. Otherwise she’d think he meant anything but what he really intended. “I mean on a date, since I know you were wondering.”

“How do you know what I was thinking?”

“Call it a hunch,” he said dryly.

Her gaze darted to the window and back. “You said the kiss was a mistake.”

“Yes.”

“And that it made you feel like . . .” She waved her hand vaguely, as if not able to form the curse. He realized he hadn’t heard her swear before.

“Shit,” he finished on her behalf. “And I said I felt like shit for doing it, not that the kiss made me feel like shit. There’s a difference.”

She rubbed her forehead. “Forgive me, but I’m confused.”

“So am I.” He crossed his arms, wondering why in the hell he was pursuing this when she’d given him an out. “I can’t stop thinking about you.” Like an irritating song. And so help him, if she said “oh,” he’d . . .

“I can’t leave Ginny alone.”

There. Another out. Perfect. They’d call it off and . . . why was his phone out of his pocket and why was he texting Jake?

Can u watch Ginny tonight? Taking Faith out.

Moments later the response came.

Jake: Lacey and I will be over by 6. Stay out all night.

He sighed in . . . relief? “Jake and Lacey will stay with Ginny. I’ll pick you up at six-thirty.”

Ginny bounded down the stairs, a towel slung over her shoulder, as he made his way to the door.

“Wait. I didn’t say yes.”

God love her. He turned and grinned at her flustered face as she stood in the entryway. “You didn’t say no, either. Six-thirty, Faith.” He tapped the doorframe and left.