Текст книги "Fear You"

Автор книги: B. B. Reid

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Текущая страница: 9 (всего у книги 21 страниц)

Chapter Thirteen

Keiran

Who the hell does she think she is? I was smart enough to know she baited me into a trap, but I didn’t have enough control to resist. Jokes on her anyway. Didn’t she know what the thought of seeing her with someone else would do to me?

A visual of someone else with his hands and lips on her¸ touching and tasting her, invaded my mind, pushing and tugging at the black hole where my heart should have been. There was no way as long as I was breathing someone would ever get their hands on her. I would mark her, fill her up, and ruin her so no one would ever stand the chance of having her.

I snapped.

I waited only the second it took to check her readiness before pulling out my cock and slipping on a condom. Her ass was still raised for my access. I gave it a hard slap, satisfied at the handprint left behind and plunged into her.

I didn’t stop taking.

I didn’t give her time to adjust.

I drove into her pliant body over and over, racing to slate my lust and anger.

If only she didn’t feel so damn good, I could punish her without letting my desire take over my intentions. This wasn’t for pleasure. This was to own. I needed to make her feel my ownership.

“Tell me,” I urged again. “Tell me again how you plan to let another guy fuck you.”

“Keiran,” she stuttered and gasped. She tried to turn and face me, but I quickly wrapped a restraining hand around the back of her neck to keep her in place while I continued to take her pussy.

“You are going to lose this war you’re trying to wage against me, Monroe. One orgasm at a time.”

“Keiran, please.” Her moans were full of pain and the need to come. She wanted the permission. She wanted me to ease her and make her come, but she knew better than that. First, I needed to have my way. I needed to make her beg for it.

“Please, what?” I leaned over to rest my chest against her back. “Fuck you?” I shoved my cock into her harder. Her squeal of painful pleasure was music to my ears. “Nice and slow was it?”

“It was just… Oh, God… a joke.”

I kissed down her back slowly without letting up on my possession of her. “So who’s joking now?” I whispered hot against her skin.

She shook her head and moaned, “I didn’t mean it.”

“Shame… because I mean this.” I shoved her body flat on the mattress and proceeded to pound into her without interruption. I clamped a hand over her mouth to muffle her screams. It was good her aunt’s room was at the other end of the hall.

On my fifth or six thrust, her pussy clenched around my cock, locking me inside her, and I stilled to enjoy the sensation of her coming on my cock… even if it was without permission. When it became too much to hold back, I gripped her hips and tried to bury my cock as deep into her as possible while at the same time, burying the feelings she was intent on drawing out of me. My release was violent in its intensity. At any moment, I expected to combust into flames as her greedy pussy sucked at my cock, milking my release. I bit my lip to keep from moaning like a bitch. The last thing I needed was for her to realize the effect she had on me. Her body alone was to die for.

I stayed on top of her longer than necessary but taking care not to crush her. I guess you could say my plan to own her backfired. Even though I was the one doing the fucking, in the end, I was the one who felt well and truly fucked—and not just in the physical sense. What is she doing to me?

After I caught my breath, I stood up from the bed and pulled on my jeans and shirt. Once decent, I stared down at her. She seemed to be out of it because she didn’t stir once. I knew she could feel when I watched her. It was another connection I had yet to understand. I quickly looked her over before determining she was just exhausted and then slipped from the room. I was mindful of the creaky spots in the floorboards as I made my way down the hall. Unfortunately, the bathroom was closer to her aunt’s bedroom so I had to be careful not to make unnecessary noise.

Once inside, I quickly ran a cloth under warm water and then headed back to Monroe. I felt like a lovesick puppy not wanting to be away from her for too long. I decided it was okay for me to admit whatever it was I felt for her, but it was something I would never let her know. It was too dangerous, and she didn’t deserve to be stuck with someone like me who was incapable of love.

Her breathing was still even when I returned and I smiled. I wouldn’t deny my male ego was through the roof. My smile dropped, however, when I moved closer and saw the bruising of her skin on her hips where I had gripped her. Shit. Did I go too far? Was she seriously hurt?

When I fucked her, I didn’t care if I hurt her or how much I pushed her—my only concern was to make her feel me the only way I needed her to feel me. But after, it never failed to make me feel like shit, and so I would immediately leave her so she wouldn’t see the turmoil within me.

With light touches so not to disturb her, I quickly checked her over and determined I hadn’t caused any damage, though I wouldn’t know for sure until she woke. Gently spreading her legs, I took the warm cloth and cleaned her up. It didn’t escape me that this was the first time I ever took the time to care for her after. With her being asleep, it was easier for me. Otherwise, Monroe would see right through me, and I couldn’t let that happen.

A low moan passed through her sweet lips as I finished cleaning her. I couldn’t resist slipping a finger inside her while leaning down to kiss her lips. When she finally opened her eyes, I was the first thing she saw and fuck if that didn’t make me hard. It was something I could easily get used to until I craved it.

Words were meaningless and unnecessary. My clothes were shed and I was sliding back inside her heat. This time, instead of the normal pounding, I moved inside her slowly, testing the waters. I couldn’t resist slipping deeper inside, causing her to moan from my possession.

“Keiran—”

“If you ever let another man touch you, I will kill you on the spot. Are we clear?”

“Your crazy has no limits,” she groaned.

“Only when it’s you.” I felt her body soften while I bit back a curse. Why hadn’t I known I would say that?

“Are…” She hesitated. Uncertainty plagued her eyes as she stared up at me with too trusting eyes, her body moving with me. “Are we making love now?”

Shit.

The self-satisfied smirk plastered on her face was beautiful. Instead of recoiling, I found myself wanting to capture this moment. The look in her eyes. The smell and feel of her skin. The sound of her soft moans.

She was everything.

I needed to stop this shit. If I weren’t careful, the little bitch would have her way. I moved to separate our bodies, already mourning the expected loss, but she must have sensed it because her legs locked around my waist.

“Don’t,” she demanded. “Don’t do it. Don’t run.”

“What makes you think I’m the one who needs to run?”

“Because I’m not afraid anymore and that scares you. I’m—” My finger slipping inside her mouth shut her up.

“Suck me,” I ordered harsher than I had intended.

Her eyes closed as she obeyed. Her lips closed around my finger, taking it deep and my dick hardened even more inside her. Together, we rocked each other to completion.

* * *

TEN YEARS AGO

I was being led somewhere. They were always taking me to places where they made me do bad things. Each time I wanted to say no but knew if I ever did, they would hurt me and not let me eat for a long time.

As I followed behind them with my hands tied, I wondered who they would make me do bad stuff to today. For two years, this had been my routine. I go where they take me and do what they tell me to do.

It was always the same.

So why did this time feel different?

They didn’t blindfold me like normal, and when we stopped outside a room, I knew why. We weren’t leaving the compound.

The door opened to a room I’d never seen before, and the first thing I noticed were all the bright lights. And the cameras. There were at least three, which was strange for a normal sized room.

What is happening?”

I looked around the room curiously, forgetting my training. We were never allowed to speak or to look anywhere but straight ahead when training. The room was empty except for the lights, cameras, and in the center of the room was large bed, and it was then I noticed the tiny form lying in the center of it.

I squinted through the bright lights, and as my eyes adjusted, recognition followed.

Lily.

What is she doing here, and where are her clothes? She was completely naked without even a blanket to cover her. I didn’t understand why, but I knew it was wrong. She shouldn’t be here. These men shouldn’t be here.

A scary thought wormed its way into my mind. Was I here to kill her? Sometimes, when they wanted to punish the other kids, they made me do it. It was much easier to kill the children than the adults. They called it extra practice. With the other kids, it was different, and each time, I was hurt because they made us fight.  They wanted me to prove myself, and so I didn’t just have to kill them, but I had to fight them to the death.

“It’s just another way to toughen you up, slave,” Frank would say.

All the cruel things they did were always for the same purpose. Didn’t they know I didn’t want to be tough? I wanted to have the fun I would hear about in the other kid’s stories. Lily was always telling me about her life with her parents and her older brother. She’d told me they even had a dog that played with her. I hadn’t seen many dogs, but the dogs I had seen were mean and scary.

“All right. Let’s get this show on the road. The clients are getting impatient. They want to see what our fresh talent can do. Get the boy’s clothes off and get him on the bed.”

Hands were on my rags grabbing and tugging. I didn’t want them to take my clothes, but I knew better than to fight them. “Today, you become a man.” Snickers and hoots sounded around the room, but I didn’t understand the joke.

As my clothes were discarded, my eyes connected with a man who stood out from the rest. His clothes were neat, and he wasn’t heavily armored like the rest of the men. He watched on with an air of authority.

When I was finally naked, they shoved me toward the bed. Toward Lily. She visibly shook, and her eyes pleaded with me to help her. I didn’t know how. I had no weapon, and I was just as scared as she must have been. I was just much better at hiding it.

As I got closer, I noticed the fresh bruises covering her body. They must have beaten her. They were always beating her, and she would always take it but never do what they told her. I didn’t understand her. I didn’t know how she could be such a coward. All she had to do was give in and the beating would stop. She wouldn’t have to cry or feel hungry anymore.

I finally reached the bed, and when I did, she sat up to reach for me. “Keiran—”

My finger quickly brushed against her lips to shush her. We were never allowed to talk. Didn’t she know that? I pushed her down until she was lying on the bed once again and ran my fingers down her face, starting at her forehead.

“Keiran, help me,” she whispered with her eyes still closed.

Did she know what she was asking? There was only one way to stop this. Only one way to save the both of us. A quick glance around the room showed me each man was armed.

I leaned down until my lips rested near her ear. “I want you to count to five, and then start screaming as loud and as long as you can. Whatever you do, don’t stop. Do you understand?”

She nodded slowly and thankfully, didn’t open her eyes.

Five seconds.

It was all I could give myself.

To think of another way out.

To say goodbye.

Five seconds was all it would take.

Because if I wait a second longer, I won’t be able to do it.

I wouldn’t be able to say goodbye.

“Are you ready?” I asked her shakily. She nodded again and started counting softly.

“One.”

I looked at the men. Most were talking while others fiddled with the camera and lights. My eyes connected with the man again to find him watching me. If he knew what I was up to, he didn’t show it. He couldn’t know anyway.

“Two.”

I looked over her naked body. The sight of her bruises made my throat close.

“Three.”

If I did this…

“Four.”

She would never have to feel pain again.

“Five.”

Lily’s piercing scream ripped through the air. I didn’t think any more of what I had to do. I waited patiently for the guards to react.

“What the hell?” The man fiddling with the camera looked up with a fierce expression. “Someone shut her up!” he bellowed when everyone continued to stare.

When the first man came forward, I sucked in a breath and held it. My eyes never left his and Lily continued to scream. Some of the men cursed and yelled while others laughed with ugly leers plastered on their faces. I hated them all.

“Shut up, girl, or you’ll get more of today right now.” When he reached the bed, and Lily continued to scream, he spit out a harsh curse and leaned over the bed to grab her. It was the opportunity I needed.

It was now or never.

“I said shut up!”

He was dumb enough to carry his gun in the front of his jeans with his shirt tucked behind it. It provided easy access for me. With his eyes focused on Lily, I was able to snatch the gun and flick the safety just as they’d shown me many times before. I willed my arms to be strong enough to hold the gun steady in my hands and aimed at the man’s head before he could react.

He jerked back a second too late, and when he finally registered his gun in my hand, his eyes widened in surprise a split second before a sneer marred his features.

Lily continued to scream, but I could feel her eyes watching me as well as the eyes of the unknown man across the room. I didn’t dare take my eyes or aim off the worker. He could take this gun from me without much effort if I looked away for even a second.

“What are you going to do with that, boy?”

“What you taught me to do.” I re-aimed the gun, and without hesitation, I squeezed the trigger.

The room was now silent, and my beating heart slowed to an ethereal cadence.

* * *

PRESENT DAY

“Keiran, I need a favor.”

These impromptu meetings with Mario would have to end. The school’s parking lot in the middle of the day was hardly the place to plan mass murders or acts of conspiracy.

“And by favor you mean something I’m likely going to regret agreeing to?” Mario was constantly involved in numerous dealings that required more than a few favors. Many times, he hinted at recruiting me into his business, but the idea of organized crime bored me.

“Call it an act of good faith,” he grinned jovially.

“Spit it out.” The answer was already no, but whatever it was, I needed to hear. I didn’t trust Mario. He wore too many faces.

“It’s my daughter.”

“You have a kid?”

I didn’t bother to conceal my surprise. As long as I’ve known Mario, he’s never once mentioned a daughter. What else was he hiding? It occurred to me that I hadn’t been doing my homework thoroughly. If all this were going to work in my favor, I would need to ensure all the cards were on the table.

“Yes. She’s a little older than you are, but not by much. With Arthur out for blood, I can’t keep as good of an eye on her.”

“Where is her mother?”

“She’s never met her. Her mother was a crack whore and not a very good one because she’s dead.”

“What does this have to do with me?”

“I need you to keep an eye on her until the heat dies down.”

“No.”

“Keiran—”

“I’m not running a babysitting service. I have my own shit to deal with.”

“And how much do you expect to accomplish if I’m weighed down? Remember, you need me just as much as I need you. This can and will work out for all of us,” he stated harshly.

Did he just threaten me?

I stared at him long and hard, weighing my options. There wasn’t a chance in hell that Mario scared me, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t pretend.

“Where is she?”

Could I really be entertaining the thought of babysitting his daughter? She may have been older, but her life was essentially in my hands. Mario wouldn't take that lightly.

“She’s on standby. Somewhere safe for now where my men are watching her.”

“Like the men who watched Trevor and Anya?”

“Look, I still have guys on that to find out what happened. I’m just as shocked as you are. No one is talking, but I promise you on the life of my daughter that I did not order the hit. It was a freak accident at best.”

“Someone poured gasoline on two of my classmates and set them on fire and you’re calling it a freak accident?” He still had yet to explain how Trevor and Anya were killed under his watch. Not only were they killed, but they also managed to make it fifty miles away from where they were being held and burned alive just outside of town.

“I know how it sounds, but what would you like me to say? The men on guard were taken care of.”

It was always the same response, and eventually, I would start to do my own digging. If I found out he was responsible, it would tip things in another direction. I didn’t care at all about what had happened to them, but my freedom was on the line.

“How long?”

“Come again?”

“How long do I need to be your daughter’s bodyguard?”

“Until we can find her a safer hideaway or until this is all over.”

“Fine. Let me talk to my uncle. Is she ready?”

“My men have her on standby. She should arrive in a couple of weeks.”

“Fine.”

I turned on my heel and left him standing alone in the parking lot. Lunch had just ended when I entered the building, and I knew Monroe would be looking for me soon. She never admitted it out loud, but she was always on the lookout for me. I wondered if it was only fear that still drove her to search me out. Whatever it was, something told me she wasn’t running anymore.

* * *

I missed Monroe after lunch. Two classes later, I trudged into last period after class had already begun. Mr. Lawson looked down his too long nose at me as I entered the classroom.

“Mr. Masters, it’s great to have you back, but please try to be on time. Tardiness will not be tolerated.”

Bite me.

A smile spread my lips when I repeated Monroe’s favorite expression. She was already rubbing off on me in ways I never would have imagined. I nodded in his direction and took my usual seat.

Monroe was back to sitting in the front again with Willow and Sheldon flanking her. Her back stiffened at the sound of my name, but she didn’t turn around. She wouldn’t dare.

I wanted nothing more than to grab her up and keep her close, but I wasn’t allowed to approach her. I wasn’t keen on obeying some piece of paper they called an order of protection, but I wasn’t stupid either. I also had to admit it pleased me she had someone to look out for her. Five months ago, and even long before that, I would have tried to do anything in my power to take away her security and protection. I wanted to keep her isolated because then I could better control her. Now I was more than grateful that she was never alone. As much as I hated it, I couldn’t always be around. There was no way in hell I would ever let her know everything I did now was to protect her. She already wanted more and had no problem demanding it. I smiled again even though my blood boiled when I thought about her little so-called threat. Jealously apparently was a trait none of us could escape. I really did mean it when I said I would kill her before I let anyone else have her. It was the very reason why I was no good for her. The days of my bullying her were long gone, but I was still the same person who pushed her off those monkey bars, and even more tragically, I was still the same person they trained me to be. It wasn’t until her I realized how fucked I really was and how my life before was so much worse than I could have imagined. People like her had it good. They never suffered or did a bad thing.

I felt some of the familiar anger from before rear its ugly head. The teacher’s lecture faded into the background until I could no longer hear him at all. I developed tunnel vision. Blood rushed to my head. All I could see was her. She could still make me feel that black part of me. The self-loathing, the violence, the hatred… the pain.

I didn’t even begin to fucking understand.

All I knew was that I blamed her.

Her innocence was the key.

Lily was the catalyst.

My mission for the past ten years, and especially these last five months, had been to break her. Make her tick. To see how long before she became just like the rest of the world.

I wanted to see her save herself. Damn her aunt and best friend just so she could be free from me.

It’s what I had to do. I had to sell my soul for a warm blanket and maybe even more than scraps to eat. And if I performed really well, I could even forego my daily whipping.

“It keeps you tough,” Frank would always say. To him, a beating would make my skin tougher so I could kill easier. The night I took Monroe’s virginity, she told me she’d grown a thick skin because of my torments. I don’t know why it made me so angry. If she hadn’t have said so, I might have stopped. I might have checked my anger in time to merely scare her and leave.

Monroe was right. I am sick.

The realization didn’t make me want to stop or quell the need to control her. It never would.

I did, however, realize this couldn’t go on forever. My fingertips dug into the table. In just a few months, we would be graduating and she would be gone forever.

The gut-wrenching part of it all was I had no way in hell of stopping her.

By the end of the period, I was in a foul mood and everyone was a target. I had to get away fast. When the final bell rung, signaling the end of the school day, I was out of there. There were only two things that could bring me down from the black cloud my mind now floated in, but one of them was no longer an option.

I headed out to my car where I stored my gym bag. The parking lot filled fast with my overly eager peers. Sometimes I envied their normal lives and normal teenage problems. How many of them could say they were in the process of taking down a slave ring?

Maybe that was why I was so worked up.

Yeah…

It had absolutely nothing to do with never seeing Monroe again.

I made it to the empty gym without delay and headed to the locker rooms. The team had already left school early to play another team tonight. Dash took over the team in my absence and given my recent jail time, I was no longer on the team. The decision of whether or not I would be allowed back on was still up in the air. With everything I had going on, I was a little relieved to have one less responsibility on my plate. For now. Basketball was something I relied on to keep me from reverting back to the person Arthur and his trainers tried to make of me.

After I had changed, I ran drills and made shots until my arms were sore. I kept going despite the ache in my limbs and the fatigue that slowly started to set in. I needed to work off all the pent up aggression I was feeling. It was working until I heard her.

“Can I play?” The softly worded questioned stopped me mid-dribble.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, taking the shot without looking back.

“I came to find you.”

“Are you in danger?”

“Not at the moment.”

“Do you need to be fucked?”

“Keiran—”

“I’ll take that as a no, which means there is no reason for you to be here.”

“Why are you so pissy today? It’s perfectly okay for you to invade my space, but I’m not allowed?”

“Damn it, Monroe. I’m not doing this today.” I dropped the ball and let it bounce away while I headed to the bleachers where I kept my gym bag and bottles of water.

“You’re a walking, talking contradiction, and just a little bit of a tease, do you know that?”

I could hear the smile in her voice. She approached me cautiously as if I were a ticking time bomb. I guess she was more perceptive than what I gave her credit. Monroe could be incredibly naive at times.

“What do you need?”

“You seemed upset when you left class.”

I blinked twice and mulled her statement over in my head. “Are you actually asking if I’m okay?” I didn’t bother to hide the disbelief from my voice.

“Yes, I guess so…” She looked as confused as I felt, and surprisingly, I felt myself relax but not much.

“I’m fine, okay?”

She cocked her head to the side and studied me. Despite the way I was treating her, she didn’t appear angry, merely curious. “Why don’t I believe you?”

I exhaled a harsh breath and felt my fists clench. “What do you want from me?”

“Answers.”

I turned away because I didn’t want to look into her eyes. It was my turn to feel like a cornered animal.

“I think we need to talk, don’t you?”

“Why are you chasing me?”

“Why are you running?” she countered. This time there was a little snap in her voice.

“You think I need to run from you?” I spun on my heel and stalked up to her until my chest was pressed against hers. I clenched my fists to keep from touching her. If I got my hands on her, I wouldn’t stop until I fully consumed her.

“I think you’re running from something.”

“What’s your deal?” My lip curled as my ire grew. I could feel myself transitioning back into Keiran the tormentor. The one who hid in the shadows waiting to pounce and attack just to see her cry. “Less than a month ago, you turned me into the police for murder, and now you’re standing in front of me wanting to figure me out?”

“Somebody has to, don’t you think? You’re dead inside, Keiran, and if you don’t—”

“Stay the fuck away from me…” I cut her off mid-sentence. “…or the nice couple you ran to before you ratted me out will pay the consequences of your actions.”

Shock and disbelief registered on her face. “How did you know?”

“I always knew where you were. It wasn’t hard to figure out. There is nowhere you can go that’s too far, and no one who can protect you from me.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” Her voice hardened with each syllable that passed through her lips, and her eyes narrowed to slits. “You may have been able to escape the law thus far. However, I promise you, if you go anywhere near them or harm them in any way, there will be nowhere you can run or no one you can call who will protect you from me.”

Careful not to show my true reaction to her threat, even though she mentally knocked me on my ass, I smirked down at her and leaned closer to whisper in her ear.

“Then you’d better be ready to pay the consequences. You don’t want me the way you think you do, and you definitely don’t want me as an enemy. This isn’t going to end with love, baby. This is just another tragedy waiting to happen.”

“Like Lily?” she asked. “Was that really her tragedy or yours, and whose will it be this time? Yours? Or mine?”

“It will be both of ours.”