Текст книги "Cruel and Beautiful"

Автор книги: A. M. Hargrove

Соавторы: Terri E. Laine
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Текущая страница: 20 (всего у книги 28 страниц)

DREW HANDLES THE REST OF his chemo fairly well, with only a few little bumps. One more fever scare but it’s only a low grade one where they initiate antibiotics at home and delay his next treatment a week. He loses a bit of weight, but not too much. What I hate the most for him is that his strength declines so hockey is no longer an option. Besides, he needs to work as much as he can, so his extracurricular activities are cut to almost none. His coworkers have been unbelievable in their support. They have picked up extra hours to give him time off when he needs it and the outpouring of support he’s received humbles Drew.

His mom makes frequent trips during his treatment while I’m at school and goes home for the weekends when I visit. We’ve worked out a great schedule between us and even Drew is good with it. He likes having her there to cook for him because he’s so wiped out if he works at all and too tired to do it himself. I’m happy knowing at least he’s getting good meals and someone is watching after him.

At the end of February, they do a follow up bone scan and another PET scan. The news is good! The tumor has shrunk down to almost nothing, so the second week in March, they do the surgical excision. It’s a rough one. They remove seven inches of his seventh rib. No one has prepared me for the chest tube and the other tubes he has coming out of him. I never was bothered much by the sight of blood, but this takes it to an entirely different level.

The nurses all hover over him, and why wouldn’t they? He’s one of their own. But damn, he looks awful. When I see him, I run to his mom and break down and cry. He’s so out of it, he doesn’t even notice I’m there.

Letty holds me, and we hang onto each other for dear life. Ray paces. It must be a terrible thing to be a physician and have your son become ill with cancer, and not be able to help him. Ray’s mind must always be in doctor mode, and that has to include a prognosis with outcome data that may or may not be positive.

“He’s going to be fine, Cate. You must believe that,” Letty says.

“I do. Only I hate seeing him like this. I don’t want him to be in pain, hurting.”

“He’s medicated. He doesn’t even know we’re here,” Ray says in a comforting tone.

“How are your classes?” Letty asks, trying to divert my attention, but I don’t want to talk about that right now.

“How long before he wakes up?” I ask Ray.

“Maybe tonight. The longer the better for him,” Ray says.

“That’s good. That will give me time to pull myself together.” I sniff.

“He needs that, Cate. He needs your strength. And for you to be here for him,” Letty says.

“Like I could possibly be anywhere else.”

I plant my butt on a chair next to his bed and the only time I leave is to use the restroom or to get something to drink. Food has no meaning for me. He wears a clear mask over his face that streams more oxygen into his lungs, but Ray tells me he’s doing really well. It’s not until his lids crack open and I see him look at me that I smile. I crawl in the bed with him and hold him.

Letty walks in and sees me. “Cate, I’m not sure you should …”

“Let her be, Letty. She’s fine and he needs her right now. She can’t hurt him.” It’s Ray that speaks.

I run my hands over his head, and seek his hand out under the sheet. Lacing our fingers together, I’m happy to feel his slightly tighten against my own. And then I doze off.

Ray wakes me some time later, asking me if I want anything to eat.

“I’m fine.”

“Cate, you need to eat. You didn’t eat yesterday, that I can recall, and you haven’t eaten a thing all day.”

I didn’t notice that Drew’s mask is gone and in its place are those small tubes that go in his nose. When he speaks, I’m surprised. “Eat, Cate. You must be starved.”

I look at him and beam. “Look who’s awake!”

“Yeah, but I feel like I got nailed by an eighteen wheeler.”

“Aww. That bad?”

“Yeah, but the morphine pump is good.”

“Huh?”

He points to a little machine on a pole next to his bed and explains how it works. It makes me feel better that it helps him so much.

“This sure breeds empathy in me for patients who go through this. Maybe I’m going through this for that reason.”

I clamp my mouth shut because I don’t believe that for a second. Drew is the most empathetic person in the world. He would be the last one to be chosen for that reason. And this is what’s killing me about him getting cancer. It should’ve been me.

Ray prods me again for my answer about food. “Okay, just get me whatever you’re having.”

He nods and both he and Letty leave.

“How’s my girl doing?” How can he ask me that? He’s the one lying in bed with his chest ripped open.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“I’m good, Cate. You’re lying next to me and that’s all I need.”

“Honestly, Drew, you kill me sometimes. How do you feel?”

“Like I said, I feel like a truck hit me. Other than that, good. I’ll be better when I know this surgery did the trick.”

“Me too. Are you thirsty? Can I get you anything?”

“I’d love some ice chips. That’s all I can have yet.”

“You got it.”

Grabbing his large water container, I wander down the hall until I find a nurse to help me. She shows me where the ice machine is and I fill up the cup and bring it back to Drew. When I spoon some into his mouth, he hums his delight.

“Never thought I’d enjoy ice chips so much.”

“It’s the small things in life.”

“And you, Cate.” He hums as I feed him more chips. “I hate I’m putting you through this.”

“Love encompasses a whole lot of things, Drew. And when I fell in love with you, I didn’t fall for only the good times. I fell for it all, including this. I’m here and we’ll get through this. So stop with that kind of talk.”

“I don’t like seeing you with the dark circles under your eyes.”

“And I don’t like seeing you in the hospital, so we’re even.”

He says he’s done with the ice and pats the bed, telling me to get back in. “I want to have you next to me.”

“You got me.” I climb back in and put my head on his shoulder. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“I won’t because I have you. You’re it for me.” Then he drifts back to sleep as I worry about what will happen next.

Ray and Letty return and they don’t look so good either. She hands me a bag that contains a chicken salad sandwich and some fries. Ray hands me a large iced tea.

“Thanks.” I get out of the bed to eat, but can only down a few bites. My stomach fights every swallow.

“It’s anxiety, dear. I feel the same way,” Letty says.

Setting my food down on a side table, I stand and pace the room. Letty glances at Ray and then says, “Cate, maybe you should go back home and take a shower. Relax. Try to get some sleep.”

“No. I won’t leave him. I have things here and can shower in his bathroom.”

“Then why don’t you do that? It might relax you some,” she suggests.

After giving it some thought, I decide to go ahead and do exactly that. As soon as the water hits me, the tears break loose. The question I keep asking myself—why Drew—yields no answer. I’ve heard people say they’ve cried themselves out. I wish that would happen to me, because my supply of tears is endless. I need to buck up and pull my shit together. Drew cannot see me like this.

Finishing my shower, I put on a strong front and get dressed. When I come out, he’s awake again. The groggy grin he offers me makes me laugh.

“You look like you’ve had too much to drink.”

“Yeah, I feel like it, too.”

I bend down to kiss him and he tells me I smell lots better now. Ray and Letty chuckle. “Glad you noticed,” I say.

The rest of the day is much the same, with Drew sleeping away most of it. By the third day, he gets antsy and cranky. He wants to go home and I don’t blame him. It seems like he’s constantly getting poked and prodded by a nurse, doctor, or a medical assistant. Sleep becomes more difficult because they withdraw his morphine and transition him to something milder.

“Cate, you need to go home tonight and get a good night’s sleep. Mom and Dad even think so. You don’t have to stay here.”

“I want to,” I insist.

“I know, but I want you to go home. This is crazy. You’re exhausted. You need a solid night of rest and you can’t get that here. I don’t want you getting sick.”

He gets me to agree, so late that night, I head to his apartment. When I crawl in bed, his scent makes me sad, so I end up crying myself to sleep. In the morning, the constant buzzing of my phone wakes me.

“Huh?” I answer.

“Cate?”

“Jenna?”

“Damn! You never answer your phone! I’ve been trying to get you for three days. Thank God for Ben. Drew’s parents are keeping him informed. What the hell is going on with you?”

“I’m sorry. I turned my phone off in the hospital so it wouldn’t disturb Drew.” I fill her in on everything.

“How are you holding up? And don’t give me bullshit answer.”

“I’m fine,” I say, my lip quivering. Then I break down and ugly cry. I mean bad ugly cry. I can’t even talk.

She listens, and then says, “I’m getting in the car and heading there now.”

The phone goes dead. A little over an hour later, she’s knocking on the door. I let her in and she wraps me in her arms as I sob my heart out. I literally collapse on the floor in her arms. The last few days have taken their toll on me and I’ve hit rock bottom. My exhaustion coupled with my worry over Drew has burst the dam that held everything in check, and having Jenna there allows me to let it all go.

When the crying passes, I take a shaky breath. “Sorry. I didn’t plan on that.”

“What the fuck are you apologizing for? I’m the one who should be apologizing. I should’ve been here with you. But I tried to call and couldn’t get you.” She pushes my hair off my face and says, “I almost don’t know what to say to you. How to make you feel better. The only thing I know is Drew is strong and a fighter. He’s going to pull out of this. He has one hell of a support team backing him. And a shit ton of love behind him. Not to mention all the news is good, so far.”

“I’m so fucking worried, Jenna. I’ve never been though anything like this. It’s fucking cancer, you know? And it’s a pediatric cancer so they don’t really know the long term.”

“He’s going to kick that cancer in the fucking ass, Cate. You have to believe in that. And you have to believe in him.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know I do. It’s just that I love him so much and I don’t know what I’ll do if anything …”

“Hey, hey, none of that talk. You hear me? We’re not even going to think that way. If anyone can survive this, it’s Drew McKnight.”

She’s right. I put on my best happy face and say, “Yeah. I’m gonna hop in the shower and then I need to get back to the hospital.”

“I’m going with you. Ben’s coming in today, too. You need a bit of relief here.”

“I’m just glad the surgery coincided with my spring break so I had the time off. I don’t know what I would’ve done otherwise.”

We get back to the hospital and the McKnights are already there. They hug Jenna, and Drew smiles at her. It’s a weird time with all of us dancing around the cancer issue. Not much later, Ben walks in.

“Dude, if you wanted attention, why didn’t you just say so? I could’ve worked something out.” Thank God for Ben. We all have a good chuckle and the room seems to lighten up with his presence. Even Drew is more cheerful.

Thirty minutes later, half of his hockey team cruises in. Talk about a crowd. Ray and Letty step outside after the introductions are made, but not Jenna. She eyes every one of the guys, checking them out. I have to laugh. Knowing her, she’ll probably end up hooking up with one of them.

Drew asks Ben if he needs a place to crash.

“No. I have a place. Yours.” Everyone laughs.

Drew makes a fist so Ben can bump it. “You know it, bro. How long you staying?”

“As long as you need me.” The intensity of their stares fills my heart with a deep love for Ben.

Drew smiles and says, “Thanks, bro. I can always count on you.”

“You know it.”

Drew grabs my hand and pulls so I have to sit on the bed. “Between this girl right here, my parents, Ben, Jenna, and the team, what more do I need?”

I want to scream—your health! But I clamp my mouth shut instead. I bend down and kiss him as everyone yells out catcalls.

Ben pats him on the shoulder and asks, “How much longer you in for?”

“A couple more days.”

“Hey, can we take you for a spin in that thing?” Ben points to the wheelchair.

Drew laughs, shaking his head. “Only you, Rhoades.”

“Dude, don’t you want a change of scenery?”

“Have you seen all the shit that’s attached to me?” Drew lifts the covers and Ben starts screaming in the loudest voice possible. Two nurses run into the room while Jenna and I laugh hysterically as do the rest of Drew’s friends. When the nurses see what’s going on, they join in.

“Which one of you is the trouble maker?” one of them asks. Everyone points to a different person and we all laugh again.

“Hey, I wanna bust my friend out of here and take him for a spin in that fancy contraption. How does one go about doing that?” Ben asks.

“You ask his nurse in a very friendly manner,” she answers with a wink. She’s a middle-aged woman with kind brown eyes. She’s been very helpful to me over the last few days.

“Is that right? Well then,” Ben checks out her name tag as he sidles next to her, “Nurse Sandy, I would very much like your kind assistance in taking my best friend here for a ride in that lovely wheelchair. I think he could use a change of scenery and give his beautiful fiancée a break. How about it?” He waggles his brows at her.

“Aww, what a sweet talker you are,” Sandy says. “I’ll gladly help you, if Dr. McKnight’s willing.”

Drew nods and they load him and all his apparatuses up for the ride. I giggle as I watch Ben’s eyes widen in horror when he sees the chest tube and the pleurovac it’s attached to.

“AHHHH! Why didn’t you warn me?” he cries.

“Dude. Grow some balls and act like a man. And I tried.”

They leave with the hockey team trailing behind.

As soon as the coast is clear, Jenna accosts me. “Why the hell didn’t you tell me?” Jenna accuses.

“Tell you what?”

“How hot Drew’s friends are?”

“I don’t know. I guess I never paid attention.”

“Figures. You fall in love and forget about your best friend.”

That night, the three of us sit around Drew’s apartment. He made me go home with them, saying he would sleep better knowing I was there.

Ben grabs a beer out of the fridge and says, “He looks good, Cate. A lot better than I thought he would. Except for all that shit hanging off him.” Ben shakes his head. “I don’t know how anyone can want to be a doctor.”

“I agree,” Jenna says. “About the Drew looking good part. Well, about both, actually.”

I half smile.

“He told me all the tests came back good,” Ben says.

“Yeah. That’s why they did the excision,” I say.

“He’s going to be fine. I just know it.” Ben squeezes my shoulder.

My phone starts to ring. It’s Mom.

“I have to get this. It’s my mom.” We talk for about twenty minutes. She’s been so great throughout this whole thing. When I hang up I promise to call her tomorrow.

Jenna and Ben are talking quietly when I return to the conversation. They look up at me with guilt written all over them.

“Spill.”

“Nothing.” Jenna is as bad of a liar as I am.

“Liar. I know when you’re hiding something.”

Ben steps into the conversation. “I shared something with her that I probably shouldn’t have.”

“What?”

“Cate, Drew asked me not to say anything.” Ben looks really uncomfortable.

“What is it?”

“You know, this puts me in a fucked up position. Me and my damn big mouth.”

“Is this something I should know?” I ask.

Ben takes a huge breath. When he does my gut twists. This is bad. “If I tell you, I betray my best friend’s confidence. And where does that leave me or what does that say about me?”

“Ben, Drew has cancer. I need to know if it’s something that has to do with his health. I love him more than my own life. Can you try to see past what you just told me? I won’t tell him. I just need to know.”

My face is wet again from tears. Jenna has her arm around me and says, “Just tell her, Ben. What more can it do?”

He rubs his neck. “Yeah, okay. He’s really scared about all of this, Cate. More so than he’s telling you. He doesn’t want you to know that. The issue is the fact that the information on treating this type of cancer in adults is so varied. He told me if he were fourteen, he’d feel much better about the diagnosis. The other thing is the location of the cancer. The prognosis is better when it occurs in the limbs, specifically in the legs. Not the ribs. That’s what else is bothering him. I think the fact that he’s a doctor makes it so much worse.”

When I really sob, Ben says, “And this is why I didn’t want to say anything.”

“She needs to know this, Ben. She needs to be there one hundred percent for Drew.”

I hate that Drew feels he can’t tell me these things. I’m supposed to be the one he can lean on. I’m supposed to be the one he runs to. Not Ben or his parents. I want to scream, cry, kick, yell. Something, anything to release my emotions.

“It’s just not fair.”

“Nothing’s fair. You should’ve learned that by now,” Jenna says.

“Jenna, don’t be so harsh,” Ben says.

Jenna looks chastised. But she’s right. Nothing is fair in life.

“UGGGGH! Of anyone, it should’ve been me. Drew … he’s so good and kind.” And that’s when it hits me. There’s a good chance he’s not going to make it. It’s the old saying—only the good die young that comes to mind and Drew is the best there is.

My face must reflect my thoughts because both Jenna and Ben say, “What is it?”

Jenna adds, “You’ve turned gray.”

In an expressionless voice, I say, “He may not make it.”

Jenna gasps. “How can you say such a thing?”

Ben doesn’t speak.

“Only the good die young, Jenna.”

“And you’re going to let a stupid saying dictate Drew’s life expectancy?”

“No, I’m letting the cancer do that.”

“You can’t! You have to fight it!”

The life has been sucked out of me. “I wish it were me. I wish I were the one sick, instead of him. He doesn’t deserve this. He’s never done a bad thing in his life.” When they say your heart breaks, whoever “they” is doesn’t have a clue what they’re talking about. Broken isn’t close. Shattered—no cigar. Splintered—nothing doing. Pulverized—where every tiny part is crushed beyond recognition—that’s about how it feels. All the bits of my heart couldn’t possibly be put back together because they are completely annihilated.

Jenna hugs me and whispers, “It’s not you, Cate. It’s not you. And you have to hold it together for him.”

“You have to believe in miracles, Cate. Sometimes they do happen,” Ben says.

The only thing I can do right now is dump more tears on my friends. How can life turn around so fast? One minute I’m on top of the world and the next, I’m at the bottom of the sea.

Time. I need to cherish it. A few short months ago I was hoping the year would fly so Drew and I could get married, but now all I want to do is freeze it. Maybe even turn it back to before he got hit in the ribs.

Ben’s arm goes around me now and says, “Hey, we’re here with you. If there’s ever anything you need, you let one of us know.”

“Yeah. Thanks. I don’t know what I’d do without you two.”

I FIND MYSELF STRAIGHTENING ANDY’S room instead of going to the kitchen where the smell of bacon beckons me. Mitch gave me hell last night in front of Andy and even though he says everything’s cool, we are alone now. He may have more he wants to say.

Finally, I walk out in a t-shirt clearly too big for me and Andy’s boxers rolled at the waist so they don’t fall down. I decide to hold my head high and stiffen my spine.

“There she is. Princess Cate.”

I’m not sure what to make of his words, so I just ask, “What are you making?”

I lean over the counter and watch him cook what I think is either the world’s thinnest pancake or a crepe.

“Crepes.”

“Wow,” I say out loud. “You can cook?”

He nods.

“I guess the better question is—Did Andy have the ingredients to make crepes?”

“It’s not that hard. All you need are flour, eggs, milk, butter, salt, and water,” he says.

“Oh,” I say, as he expertly flips it in the pan. “Most single guys wouldn’t keep flour around.”

I know Andy can cook, but he doesn’t bake, or at least he hasn’t in the past.

“I’m sure someone left it over.”

His words sting, but when I glance at him under a curtain of my hair, I don’t see any malice in his expression.

“I guess so,” I mutter.

“No worries, shorty. Drew is all about you. Whoever left it is a nobody.”

He’s trying to smooth things over but I’m getting more uncomfortable thinking about Andy with anyone else.

I go to sit on the couch and flip the TV on. I don’t want Mitch to see me rattled.

“What do you want on your crepe? I found strawberries and whipped cream in the fridge,” he calls out to me.

I have no desire to eat whipped cream. It isn’t like Andy constantly ate the stuff. Did he use that on another woman? I try not to let petty jealousy get the best of me. He has a right to be with anyone—or at least he did. Then I remember the ice cream sundae fixings I left here a few weeks back. That doesn’t explain the strawberries.

The door opens and Andy walks in with a dusting of snowflakes on his coat. It must be really cold for them to not have melted on his way to his apartment.

“You treating my girl good?” Andy asks Mitch.

“Like a princess. I’m making crepes. Bro, you have whipped cream and strawberries in your refrigerator. Dare I ask?”

Andy’s response comes so easy. “I bought ice cream and that stuff for the dessert you interrupted last night.”

Mitch has no shame and only shrugs. “My bad.”

Andy makes his way over to me and kisses me quickly, but not before his nose brushes mine.

“You’re cold,” I squirm.

“I could heat you up.”

“Yeah, don’t mind me. I like to watch,” Mitch calls out.

Andy groans. He straightens and takes his coat off. “They’re plowing the roads. You’ll be able to go home soon,” he calls out over his shoulder to Mitch.

Mitch puts a hand on his heart. “I’m hurt. Here I am slaving over a hot stove for your woman and you’re kicking me out.”

Andy laughs and I find it hard not to. “Have you heard from Dave?”

“No, but that prick’s probably got company of some variety. Has Drew told you about our friend Dave?”

“Not much,” I say.

“Dave is the prettiest of all of us, or so women say. He can have any woman he wants, but he’s not happy just with women. No, he mixes it up with anyone who catches his eye.”

I vaguely recall the guy Mandy called Thor that drunken night and agree that Dave is pretty hot.

“If not for his self-righteous father, I think he might have given up women,” he says absently. “Don’t you think Drew?”

Andy shrugs.

“His Dad doesn’t approve?” I ask.

Mitch laughs. “His Dad is a good ole southern boy and a Senator to boot. Dave’s a chip off the old block. Kind of like me. Follow in the footsteps of our fathers, they say. You’ll be successful one day… they say.” He gives Andy a knowing look.

“You had a choice,” Andy says. “You could have taken that fancy law degree and joined a firm.”

“You’re a lawyer?” I ask. It seems weird someone would go through the trouble of getting a law degree and not use it.

“I’m a Lobbyist at my dad’s firm,” he says with a disgusted curl to his lip.

Oh, I mouth, wanting to know more but thinking it isn’t any of my business.

Now that I know the whipped cream isn’t a product from any of Andy’s former dates, I eat Mitch’s crepe and fuss over it.

“It’s really good.”

“My mother is an excellent cook. She had no choice but to teach me, her baby boy.” He winks. “My two older brothers showed no interest in the culinary arts.”

“You’re going to make some woman very happy,” I declare with my chin resting on my hand as I study the guy who treated me like mortal enemy number one last night.

He shakes his head. “The only woman I’ll ever love is my mother.”

I say nothing because most women don’t want a mama’s boy, even though they say that a man will treat his wife like he treats his mother.

“He’s not telling the truth. The truth is some girl broke his heart and he’s never recovered.”

Mitch jumps in. “She didn’t break my heart,” he denies. “Besides, women don’t want to be treated with respect. They respect you more when you treat them like dirt.” When I gasp, he adds, “Present company excluded.”

“Not all women,” I say feeling the need to stand up for a lot of females.

“Okay, why don’t you two agree to disagree?” Andy says to keep the peace.

Mitch nods and I do too. A silence settles over us. I get up and take the empty dishes.

“You don’t have to clean up after us,” Andy says.

“It’s fine. You’ve hosted us, Mitch cooked, and I’ll clean.”

I settle in and do the dishes while the guys sit on the couch. Andy looks tired and I realized I haven’t asked how he’s doing. I wonder how to bring up the subject as I watch the snow continue to fall heavily through the window.

After I finish with clean up, I join the boys on the coach. Some sports channel is droning on about basketball playoffs or something. I curl up next to Andy, needing to be close to him, when cell phones begin to buzz.

Andy gently moves my legs over to stand and walk further away, while Mitch answers his phone.

Their conversations overlap, so I don’t really hear either of them well. They both end the call within seconds of each other.

“I’m out. I’ve got a date.”

Andy glances at Mitch. “You sure you can drive in this?”

Mitch’s smile is wicked. “Don’t have to drive. I met this little brunette on the elevator last night. She invited me down to her place for lunch.”

“You just ate,” I say pragmatically.

He winks at me. “I’m suddenly very hungry. Don’t wait up for me.”

Andy shakes his head. “You’re worse than Dave.”

“Don’t hate the player,” Mitch says getting to his feet. “I might be back. So don’t go having sex on the couch.”

“I have to go into the hospital. I’m hoping Cate will come with me. We shouldn’t be long though.”

Mitch grabs his coat before saluting us goodbye while heading out the door.

“So, will you come to the hospital with me?”

There is hope in his eyes. He knows what he’s asking of me and I’m not sure I’m ready. He may be used to walking in the cancer ward, but one experience was enough for me to last a lifetime. Still, if I’m going to be with this man, I need to get used to what he does for a living.

“I don’t have a change of clothes, remember? I have heels and a skirt. I can’t walk in the snow like that.”

“Actually, I drove this morning which turned out to be a mistake. I left my car because they have volunteers with four wheel drive who are playing taxi. I’ve arranged for someone to pick me up in ten minutes. The roads should be better on the way back and I can drive us home.”

I sigh with a smile. “Okay, I’ll go.”

He’s practically beaming his pearly whites at me. He’s knows I like a man with good teeth and his are dentist approved.

“If you look at me like that, we’re going to miss your ride,” I tease.

“Are you daring me to see what I can do in ten minutes?”

He tosses me over his shoulder before I can answer and shows me just what he can do in that short time. It’s a hell of a lot.

When he gets the call his ride is here, I’ve just finished getting dressed.

“Is your office open tomorrow?”

I check my phone. “I’m not sure. I don’t have any messages from them yet. Do you know what the weather man says about tomorrow?” I haven’t watched the news since I’ve been here.

“Supposedly, the snow will end late tonight. We will have up to eighteen inches when it’s over.”

“Eighteen inches?”

He nods and helps me get into my coat. We head downstairs and once we get outside the wind howls and snow lashes over me. I can’t imagine driving in this weather. This area isn’t supposed to be prone to snow like this. I feel like stomping my feet like a toddler that my first winter in DC area is the worst they’ve seen in years.

We dash over to the SUV that waits at the curb. When Andy opens the front passenger door, I’m just as shocked to see the woman driver as she is to me.

“Hi,” she says as Andy ushers me to sit in front.

I recognize the blonde ponytail the woman sports. I can’t be sure it’s the same nurse as the one I caught kissing him. But she does have on scrubs.

Andy climbs in the back. “Thanks for the ride, Becca.”

“Yeah sure. I was on the phone with Stacy when you called in. Since I drove right by your place, I offered to pick you up.”

“Becca, this is my girlfriend Cate. Cate, this is Becca. She’s a nurse in the oncology unit.”

“Girlfriend?” She says the word under her breath. I’m not sure she even realizes she’s said it out loud. “Nice to meet you,” she says with a cheery smile I can tell is forced.

She holds out her hand and for a second I’m tempted to pull a Mitch. Then again, I’m not positive she’s the nurse that’s been hitting on Andy. She could be another nurse interested in him, and could I blame her?

“You too,” I say giving her a genuine smile and shake her hand briskly.

When it’s obvious no one is going talk, she turns on the radio. I song I recognize is playing. As I hum with the song, Becca maintains a white knuckle grip on the steering wheel. I wonder if it’s because the roads are snow covered and slick or if she’s grief-stricken to find out Andy’s off the market. I’ll keep on wondering because there is no way I’m going to ask.

The hospital isn’t far. When she parks, an older Nick Jonas song, Jealous, starts to play. It’s almost funny how fast she turns the car off killing the song midsentence.

Andy takes my hand as we walk into the building. He tries to be nice and make small talk with Becca, but her clipped answers are indication enough she’s not happy.

When we reach the ward, Becca takes off her jacket and introduces me to the other nurses sitting at the station.

“Hey everyone. This is Doc Drew’s girlfriend, Cate.”

I get a few smiles. A few others trade glances between Becca and me. I’m starting to wonder if Becca is a former girlfriend or fling of Andy’s. She does know where he lives.

“Weren’t you here earlier, Doc?” A male nurse with dark hair and a round face asks, easing the tension and cutting off my thoughts.

“Yes. I’m back to see Tasha. Her mom wasn’t here earlier and has asked to speak to me.” He lays his coat on a chair and steps back over to me.