Текст книги "Perfection Is Just An Illusion"

Автор книги: Rebecca Barber

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Текущая страница: 10 (всего у книги 17 страниц)

Chapter 11

Anna

Anna had never felt so lost and alone in her entire life. The hopelessness and hurt was palpable. Never had words cut her so deeply and left such deep, ugly scars. She knew without a doubt that she loved James with everything she was, so it was a complete mystery as to why she hadn’t even made a start on her wedding plans. It was every girl’s dream to have the perfect wedding, but for some reason she just couldn’t get into it. It just wasn’t her. But losing James was something else entirely.

She spent the day walking around her apartment in a daze. Every time the phone rang Anna couldn’t help but jump, hoping and praying that it was James so she could apologise. She was desperate to apologise for everything she said and everything that she didn’t say. But still, he didn’t call.

“I can’t spend the next four weeks traipsing around feeling sorry for myself. I’m going to plan this damn wedding before he gets home if it kills me. Then I’m going to drag his ass to the church.” Anna tried pumping herself up. Then she got on the phone all afternoon. Her first phone call was to Renee. With her help this wedding could be organised and ready to go in five short weeks. Renee knew James’s family and friends. She knew who he would want there and who he wouldn’t. And Renee knew how Anna could make this a very special day for both of them.

An hour later Renee had taken charge and was in full planning mode. They had so much to organise in so little time. Renee handed Anna a list. She was calling caterers and churches, florists and car hire. By two o’clock that afternoon, with both women totally exhausted mentally and physically, they headed into Anna’s nightmare. Anna had to face the dreaded bridal store. She had to find a dress. It needed to be perfect. Classy yet sexy. Understated but elegant. Anna was a simple girl with simple tastes. And even though it was her wedding day, she needed to feel like she was still in there somewhere.

A fatigued Anna collapsed into bed that night. Her mind was still whirling a million miles an hour. Her heart was beating faster than a drum. All she wanted to do was sleep, but sleep wouldn’t come. Anna had one of the worst days in her life and it kept spiralling.

When Anna had arrived home earlier on in the afternoon, she found a note pushed under her door. A single sheet of cream coloured paper, covered in scratchy handwriting. At first Anna thought it could be as simple as a neighbour informing her about something that was going on in the building, but when she unfolded the paper she knew instantly what it was.

Another threat. Just like the ones James had already received.

Tell him to stay away from you or he will pay the ultimate price.

Anna had never been more terrified. James was a world away. This time she had to face this on her own. Anna began to shake. Her hands trembled and her knees felt weak beneath her. Not trusting her legs to hold her, Anna sunk onto the thick red rug and wrung her hands absentmindedly. She was unable to think clearly. She ran to the phone and dialled Renee’s number. On the third attempt, it connected.

“Renee! Renee!”

“Anna? Is that you?” Ryan asked.

“Where’s…where’s Renee?” Anna barely managed to blurt out.

“She’s out. What’s the matter, Anna? What’s wrong?” Ryan soothed.

“Someone’s been here,” Anna panted frantically down the phone.

“Stay there. I’m on my way,” Ryan directed firmly. He quickly shot a text message to Renee.

Anna was scared. More scared than she ever imagined possible. Someone was after her. And it made her violently ill at the thought that they would hurt James to get at her. Or maybe it was as simple as someone wanting to scare the living daylights out of her. And if that was their aim, then it worked. Anna was terrified. She sat slumped on the rug in the middle of the room, her arms wrapped around her legs, trying to make herself as small as possible. In her left hand she held the phone, while in her right a photo of her and James during happier times.

***

James

James fell into bed late that afternoon suffering a serious case of jetlag. When he eventually surfaced the next morning, his worst nightmare had become reality. James realised he was wrong. He shouldn’t have snapped at Anna. He finally got it. He understood where she was coming from. And with that, came the dizzying realisation that he was being a complete jerk. Unfortunately for James, his morning was only just beginning. As soon as he set foot outside the front door of his hotel, the entire English press was waiting. Overnight, one of the other coaches had made claims that James was using performance enhancing drugs.

This can’t be fucking real, James swore to himself. On top of everything else, he had to face drug allegations as well. Could things get any worse? Side stepping the press, James slipped back inside and started to ring everyone that he would need to help deal with this. Taking the stairs two at a time, Joel burst into James’s room, still wearing his pyjamas. Diana and Michael were standing there before he even picked up the phone and Tim raced through the door, making vain attempts to calm everyone.

Despite all the commotion, all James could think of was how horrible he had been to Anna and how much he wished she were here with him right now. He was trying to get to the phone. Pushing past his parents, James seized it and vanished into the other room.

“What are you doing?” Diana had never really questioned her son, but now with drug allegations floating about, one simple phone call to the wrong person could make everything even worse, if that was at all possible.

“Calling Anna. I need to talk to her,” James pronounced, slamming the door in an attempt to get some privacy. He wasn’t too proud to grovel, but that didn’t mean he wanted witnesses either.

“Come on, pick up the phone, Anna. Pick up,” James begged. The phone continued to ring. Soon enough it rang out. “Damn it, Anna. Where the fuck are you?”

***

Anna

Ryan must have literally flown across town. He was there within half an hour and Anna had never been more grateful. With trembling hands she handed Ryan the letter and explained about the others that had been sent to James. Ryan was mystified and livid at the whole situation. He couldn’t comprehend that there was some sick person out there doing this to them. Ryan kept promising Anna that she was safe. He promised that nothing could harm her, but Anna couldn’t let herself believe it.

Ryan stayed with her most of the night. Despite Anna’s reassurances that she would be fine, Ryan refused to leave.

“I’m okay, promise,” Anna tried.

Shaking his head, Ryan just looked into Anna’s tired eyes and Anna felt it in her stomach. It was like he could see right through her and that terrified Anna more than the thought of a possible stalker. “Anna, give it up, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere.”

“But Renee…”

“Renee knows exactly where I am. And don’t fool yourself. You think if I went home now and left you alone I wouldn’t get my butt kicked?”

Anna couldn’t help but smile. Ryan never failed to make her see the bright side and right when she needed it the most, he didn’t fail. “Renee’s not scary.”

“You reckon?”

“Yeah, she’s a softy at heart,” Anna assured him.

“She might be. But her brother isn’t, especially when it comes to you, Princess.” Ryan winked knowingly, sending a swarm of butterflies deep in Anna’s stomach.

Defeated, Anna gave in. She was beyond tired and everything ached. Her feet were red and sore from an entire day of shopping. Stumbling to her feet she ran herself a scalding, vanilla scented bubble bath and poured a glass of red wine. After lighting a few candles and plugging in her iPod she finally let herself relax and forget about everything.

When she emerged an hour later, her hair was sopping wet, her legs were red from the scalding water, and her face had been scrubbed within an inch of its life. She poured more wine and curled up on the lounge. Ryan sat back in the recliner watching Anna like a hawk. His eyes never wavered. Anna noticed the fear in his face, but didn’t call him out on it. There was no point. She’d barely gotten comfortable when a break in the show Ryan had been watching caught Anna’s attention. And then there he was. James had been accused of being a drug cheat. The way the story was being portrayed, they had already declared James guilty. The English press were playing judge, jury, and executioner. She watched on intently as they shamelessly attacked him.

“Can this day get any worse?” a deflated Anna asked Ryan.

“Don’t ask. You never know what’s going to happen next.

“Yes, I do,” Anna corrected him.

Before Ryan knew what to do or say Anna was stuffing clothes into a bag. She was headed to England and no one would stop her. She didn’t even pause to remember the fight that she had with James. That meant nothing now. He was accused of being a cheat and Anna knew the truth. James had always been a crusader against drugs. The idea that some athletes would go to any length to win disgusted him. It completely compromised what the sport was really about. But more than that, Anna knew that James was absolutely terrified of needles. He was petrified of them. So there was no conceivable way that he would or could stick himself with a needle just to help himself win. He didn’t need them. James just worked longer and harder than anyone else, and the rewards just kept coming.

Half an hour after the broadcast, Anna was in a taxi on her way to the airport. Her flight left in an hour. Soon enough she would be in London standing beside him. No matter what happened or what anyone said, they could handle it together. And they would. Anna sighed to herself as she remembered just how manipulative and invasive the English press could be. Two weeks after James had announced their engagement; it made the news in the UK, or at least the trashy UK tabloids. It wasn’t long after they began digging through their lives. It was Anna’s rude introduction to celebrity. The biggest complaint they had was Anna had no dirt to dig up. They made deplorable attempts to talk to her family and friends yet they still came up empty-handed. The only thing they found was Anna had dated the same boy at high school for three years—Grant—and they had a rather messy break up. They even contacted Grant and tried to bribe him into talking. Thankfully he remained silent.

Anna rang Renee from the back of her taxi. “Hey, Renee.”

“Hey! I was just going to call you. Have you seen what’s happening over there? Can Europeans be any more stupid? It’s painfully obvious they don’t know James at all. He has already rung me three times trying to find out where you are and why you aren’t answering. He’s trying to find you. Please talk to him,” Renee begged on her brother’s behalf.

“Renee, shut up.” Anna laughed. “I’m not home. I’m in a taxi on my way to the airport now…” But before she could finish Renee cut her off.

“Where are you going? This really isn’t the best time to take a holiday, Anna. Please at least talk to him. Please, Anna. Think about it.”

“Renee! Calm down. I’m heading to London. My flight leaves in an hour. That’s why I’m ringing. I need your help.” Anna knew that if she asked for Renee’s help she wouldn’t hesitate. Renee was amazing like that. Family was the most important thing in Renee’s world. She would do anything to protect them. And that family now included Anna. No matter how reluctant she was to admit it.

“That’s so romantic. How can I help? Just name it,” Renee’s voice trilled with excitement.

Anna’s head was spinning, her heart pounding. She was so nervous and so afraid she feared the cramping in her stomach would swallow her whole. “I need you to get in touch with your parents and tell them I’m on my way. But they can’t tell James. He can’t know. Not until I get there. And if it’s not too much trouble, can you ask them if they would mind picking me up at the airport?” Anna quickly gave Renee all of her flight details before saying goodbye.

“No problem! They’ll be there to meet you. Good luck, Anna. Have a great trip and thanks for keeping my husband occupied.” Renee let out a little squeal as she hung up.

As the taxi turned into the drop off area, Anna’s stomach lurched as she glimpsed her watch, she was already running late. Quickly, she tossed some cash at the driver, grabbed her bags, and ran through the heavy glass doors. The airport was buzzing. People milled about crying goodbye to loved ones, while others grinned wildly as someone they knew emerged from the bowels of the airport. Anna looked down at her small suitcase and cabin bag and suddenly remembered everything she had forgotten. She’d been in such a hurry that she hadn’t paused to think about what she was throwing in the suitcase. She had what she had, anything she was missing she would have to make do.

Her flight was announced and Anna clambered on board and found her seat. Due to her poor decision making and lack of organisation she’d been forced to make a last minute booking. Not only did this max out her already well-worn credit card but it had sat her in the middle seat of the crowded cattle class. Some days I wish I wasn’t so stubborn about accepting James’s money, Anna scolded herself as she fumbled into her seat, dreaming of first class. The woman in front of her was travelling solo with her four little kids. Anna couldn’t contain her smile as she thanked her lucky stars it wasn’t her. Twenty-two hours trapped in a sardine tin with four kids was definitely not her idea of a pleasant way to travel. The eldest couldn’t have been more than eight years old. Anna watched as she struggled to stow her luggage and control her kids. Anna jumped up and helped her pack her bags into the overhead compartments before taking her seat next to the young boy.

“Hello there, Miss.” He grinned, looking up at her friendly face. Anna remembered how dishevelled she must look. Her hair was pulled back and her face had been covered in a light dusting of makeup which she could only assume had mostly been wiped off by now. In her haste, she hadn’t had the time or the desire to touch it up. Besides, by the time she disembarked on the other side of the world she would only look worse anyway. “You’re very pretty, Miss.” He smiled sweetly. He had the most perfect smile and his accompanying English accent was endearing.

“Thank you. My name’s Anna. What’s yours?” she asked, extending her hand.

“My name is Braiden,” he stated, taking her hand.

His mother gazed over at him, shaking her head apologetically. “Braiden, leave the poor lady alone. She doesn’t want to listen to you nattering on.” His mother looked up at Anna with apologetic eyes.

“It’s fine, really. So Braiden, how old are you?” Anna enquired with all the enthusiasm she could muster. The young boy was beaming with confidence. For some bizarre reason this intrigued and captivated her.

“I’m seven years old, Miss,” he answered politely. Anna noticed he was only around four and a half feet tall and as skinny as a rake. He wore a pair of faded blue jeans, which were held up by a dark brown belt with a huge silver buckle in the middle. He had a pale blue button up shirt with a white undershirt showing from under his collar. He had a mass of jet black hair and big, sparkling, green eyes. He was one of the most beautiful children Anna had ever seen. He seemed extremely intelligent and well-spoken. He was cultured and polite and seemed more than capable of holding a civilised conversation with people more than three times his age. “What is your last name, Miss?”

“My surname is White. Anna White, and it’s very nice to meet you, Braiden, who’s seven years old.” She smiled. For some reason Braiden was completely mesmerised by Anna.

“Miss White, are you Australian?” Anna nodded back to him. “Can you tell me what it’s really like? All I got to see is my Grandma’s. I was there two weeks and I didn’t even get to see a kangaroo. Have you ever seen one?” Braiden peppered her with questions. His impeccable manners threw her into a state of shock.

“I promise to tell you anything you want to know, but only if you promise to call me Anna. Miss White makes me sound old.” They both laughed.

“Deal!” Braiden agreed, giggling back at her. They sat chatting as the plane took off. Their conversation only paused long enough for them to scoff down the horrible airline food they were served. Anna told him all about Australian animals and places and in turn, he told her about all the places that she must visit while she was in England. Anna was amazed by the way Braiden spoke about his homeland. He had such passion, such a deep affinity for his country and its people.

“You have to visit the country. It’s amazing out there. When Dad’s home he takes me camping and there are birds everywhere. We go hiking and we play in the waterfalls. He says I’m too young to swim in them yet, but maybe this year I’ll be big enough. If you go out there I can tell you the best camping spots.” As Braiden spoke romantic images filled Anna’s head.

“Wow! You must really love England. You sure you’re only seven?” Anna joked. She genuinely liked Braiden. He was interesting and the whole time she was talking to him she forgot about everything else. All the bad stuff in her life was forgotten. And for the brief moment she didn’t have room to consider what James was going through or what she was going to do when she got to England, especially if James didn’t want to see her.

“Are you coming to London by yourself?” Braiden probed. Anna could read the concern in his eyes, but immediately discarded the idea.

“No, I’m meeting someone there,” Anna reassured him.

“Your boyfriend?” Braiden smirked, sounding slightly jealous.

“No. Not my boyfriend,” Anna never lied. James hadn’t been her boyfriend for a while now and he was never going to be again.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” he asked nervously.

“Nope. I don’t have a boyfriend. Do you have a girlfriend?” Anna teased, watching as a blush consumed him. If he wanted all the details of her personal life then she would make him squirm a little.

“No! Girls are mean. Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

“I don’t have a boyfriend because…I have a fiancé,” Anna answered honestly.

“Do you have a picture? Can I see?” Anna flipped open her wallet and handed him a picture of James and her together. Anna was perched on the swing, James standing behind her. His arms wrapped around her waist and they were both smiling whole-heartedly. Braiden took the picture out of her hand and studied it intently. “What’s his name?”

“That’s my James. You’d like him. He’s kind of like you in a way; he loves Australia just as much as you love England.” Anna was trying to reassure him that James was worthy of her. Or maybe she was reassuring herself.

“I think I’ve seen him somewhere before. I’m just not sure where,” Braiden stated, looking confused as he reluctantly handed back the picture. “What’s he do?”

Anna thought it was strange being interrogated by an inquisitive seven year old who she only met a few hours ago. But nothing would deter her from answering him. If there was one thing Anna hated more than anything else it was lies and liars. There was neither the need nor the place.

“He’s a swimmer.” Anna saw the lights flicker in Braiden’s eyes.

“Now I know where I’ve seen him. He’s James Thompson. He swims for Australia. He’s very good and has broken lots of world records. I didn’t know he was getting married.” All the pieces had fallen into place now. Everything that Anna had said about the man she was going to marry, it all began to make sense and come together.

Their conversation fizzled, and Braiden turned his back to Anna, curled up on his seat, and fell asleep. Anna felt sorry for the young boy. He’d been so talkative right up until Anna’s mystery man was revealed then he just rolled over and went to sleep. Anna pulled out a blanket from the overhead compartment and draped it over him.

Braiden’s mother looked over at her son, then at Anna. “I’m sorry. He shouldn’t have talked your ear off. He’s a good kid.”

“That’s fine. I learnt a lot talking to him. Especially about England.” Anna winked, closing her eyes.

A bright-eyed flight attendant woke Anna hours later. “Excuse me, Miss. We will be landing momentarily. Could you please place your seat in the upright position as we begin our descent?” With those few words Anna was thrown back into reality.

It was time to face James. The anxiety was back in cyclonic proportions. The last time Anna had seen James, he had been so angry and hurt. Anna knew she had to face the possibility that James might not want to see her. She’d flown halfway around the world, and she hated to fly, just to see him and support him. But what if he didn’t want her there? What was her next move?

What seemed like hours later she had cleared customs and was nervously shuffling through the steel doors out to the arrivals hall at busy Heathrow airport. Anna was hoping that Renee had managed to reach her parents, and that they were there to meet her. She couldn’t bear the thought of being alone in this strange city. Thankfully she didn’t have to find out. Diana saw her standing there, looking very lost and very scared. Even after a twenty-two hour flight, Anna still looked amazingly beautiful and fresh.

“Anna!” Michael called out, taking long strides towards her.

“Hey guys. I didn’t know if you would come,” Anna admitted sheepishly. She dropped her bags and embraced them both at once.

“Don’t be silly, Anna. Of course we were going to come. James will be delighted to see you,” Diana comforted her.

“And relieved,” Michael added with a smile.

“Come on, let’s get out of here. We told James we were getting a cup of coffee. That was two hours ago.” They all laughed and headed towards the exit.

They arrived at the hotel where Anna’s greatest fears rang true. The English press were camped out en masse. Michael suggested that he and Diana head up first—after all the press already knew who they were—and then Anna would follow ten minutes later. Anna agreed, but despite Diana’s optimism she still remained jaded. The closer she came to seeing James the more she feared his reaction to seeing her.

***

James

When Diana and Michael entered, James was pacing back and forth across the room. “Where did you two get to? Seriously! Three hours to get a cup of coffee?”

“I wasn’t aware that we were on curfew,” Michael retorted. He didn’t mean to be rude, he could see the amount of pressure his son was under, but he wasn’t about to bow down to temper tantrums.

“Sorry, Dad. I didn’t…” A knock at the door cut him off. James knew the press were out there, but he thought they at least had the decency to leave him alone while he was in his room.

Everyone froze. Everyone in the room knew it was Anna except James. He pointed to Joel to be the one to open the door. Joel just shook his head. “Your room, you answer it!”

James tried to get everyone to answer it. His face filled with frustration when no one budged. The knock came again. “It’s just the door. Answer it,” he snapped at his father. James was in a foul mood. He hadn’t slept in days.

“Well, if it’s just the door, answer it your damn self,” Michael told his son, using his stern dad voice. He left no room for arguments. The decision had been made.

James charged towards the door and hesitantly unlocked it. As he opened the door, Anna lifted her face up and looked into his shocked eyes. He slammed the door so hard it nearly fell off its hinges. Instantly James was fumbling with the chain, it was almost as if he couldn’t get the latch off fast enough. With a ferocity he had never known, James yanked open the door and rushed out. A contingent of the local press had camped out on his floor, watching for any sign of movement. The moment the door opened, they pounced, cameras ready. James didn’t care. He dived out the door and swept Anna off her feet. A sea of camera flashes went off. Neither James nor Anna even noticed. “I am so sorry. I’m sorry,” James repeated, covering her neck and face in kisses.

Without hesitation, James carried Anna through the door and kicked it shut behind him. Within minutes everyone hugged Anna and expressed their gratitude for her coming before they discreetly excused themselves, leaving Anna and James completely alone, staring doe-eyed at each other.

The moment they had their privacy, their embrace was full of passion and happiness. Now it was time to make up.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” he asked, kissing her again. He still hadn’t let her go. He never wanted to let her go again. His hands roamed her body greedily. The time they had spent apart was more than enough.

“I didn’t know if you wanted me here, so I didn’t tell you and just came anyway, just hoping you didn’t send me away.” Anna smiled, her eyes reflecting the happiness that consumed her. James was still holding her tight. “Sweetie, you know I love you, but could you please loosen your grip a bit? I am having a little trouble breathing.” Anna giggled, looking up into his eyes.

“I always want you here,” James said honestly.

Without flinching, Anna locked her gaze with his. “Okay then.”

“So, what did you get up to since I left?” James chuckled, sliding into the lounge chair and dragging Anna into his lap. “I mean besides missing me, obviously.”

“Obviously.” Anna grinned, kissing him again. “I see your ego didn’t take a hit?

“Never!”

“Cocky?”

“Nah, confident!”

“Anyway, Mr. Bighead. I have been a busy little bee lately. I planned our wedding. The invitations have gone out, the church has been booked, the cake tasted, my dress ordered, and the bridesmaids’ dresses have all been fitted.”

“My, my, my. You have been busy, haven’t you?” James was laughing hysterically. “So, do I get any details?”

“You’re not supposed to get all the details. You’re just supposed to show up and think I look beautiful,” Anna admonished.

“Firstly, I think you look beautiful in your flannelette pyjamas, so in your wedding dress, that’s a given. And secondly, I don’t need all the details. Just some. Like, how about you tell me when we’re getting married?” James flirted unashamedly. All the frustration and anger Anna had seen in his eyes before he left was gone. All had been completely replaced by pure unadulterated love and admiration.

They spent much of the afternoon lounging around in his hotel room, talking and laughing. They were always touching. James traced lazy circles on her legs, while Anna’s fingers tangled in his hair. They were acting as if they were sitting at home, in their own bedrooms without a care in the world. Anna told him all about her conversation with Braiden and how he showed her his love for his country. Anna explained the shock she felt when it was telecast that he was a drug cheat. James regaled his tale of disbelief and disappointment. They both agreed they couldn’t change it, so they resolved to just go with it. Before they knew it they had also concluded that remaining prisoners in a hotel room wouldn’t help either. So with a new determination, they made plans for the following day.

James woke at five o’clock that morning with a spring in his step. He was desperate not to let this whole drug slur make an impact on his championship campaign. By six o’clock he was in the pool, pushing harder than ever before. More than ever James was determined to not only win all seven of the races he was entered in, but to smash all the world records in the process.

When he arrived back at the hotel at nine o’clock that morning, Anna was already dressed and waiting. James was shocked to see her up and about. Despite their attempt to sneak past the media they couldn’t dodge the barrage of questions being fired at them. James continued to smile and wave at the cameras as he tried to shield Anna. The amusing part was the questions being asked had nothing to do with the drug scandal that had brought them to his front door. Now the questions focused on the sudden appearance of a woman by his side. They were desperate to learn Anna’s identity.

Neither James nor Anna could be bothered hiding. Unlike James, it was Anna’s first overseas adventure and she was determined to make the most of it. James had been travelling around the world since he was fifteen years old. He had been to Africa, Asia, North America and all across Europe. Now he was keen to show Anna as much of this beautiful world as he could.

Wherever they went they had an entourage shadowing their every step. Burly security guards and a bunch of paparazzi snapping their every move, James and Anna ducked into a small, cosy café for lunch. They had spent the morning shopping, giving Anna a chance to buy all the things she had forgotten to pack. They shopped for clothes, shoes, and even furniture. James and Anna were now in the midst of preparing for their future. When they arrived home in less than a month, the house hunting would start. James already selected the perfect house where he wanted them to live and raise their family. He knew the area and even the street where their home should be. Even if he had to build the house himself, James knew they were going to live by the water, in a house with views forever.

In James’s mind he had designed everything down to the last details and he wasn’t going to settle for anything less than his dream. As they were eating their lunch and chatting easily, James decided that he should probably tell Anna about their dream house that he’d already designed. “Hey. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about where we’re going to live out our happily ever after.”

“Have you now? Well, do tell! Where are we going to live?” Anna encouraged, stuffing another chip in her mouth.

“Well, it doesn’t technically exist yet, so that is a slight problem. But I have designed us the perfect house—right on the water, a two-storey masterpiece. On the bottom floor, a two car garage, a rumpus room, and a guest room with an en suite.”

Anna laughed. “Is that all, no wine cellar?” she teased.