Текст книги "Be My December"

Автор книги: Rachel Brookes

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Текущая страница: 23 (всего у книги 26 страниц)

“She is everything to me Ash and I will do whatever it takes to show her that.” I stated with determination.

“You need to tell her that. You two are good for each other, perfect even, and I really hope you both know that.”

“We are going to get some food and finish chatting. I just came to get her suitcase so she can change.”

“Hang on a second, I’ll go and grab it for you.”

Ashlyn peeled herself off the couch and disappeared down the hall, only to reappear a couple of seconds later with Eden’s suitcase.

“Good luck. Show her your heart Ky because your heart is a beautiful thing.”

••••

I pushed open the door of my apartment and stepped into still darkness. My eyes tried to adjust and scope out my surroundings. I quietly wheeled Eden’s suitcase in through the living room toward my room.

What I found halted my breath.

Eden lay in the center of my bed, her dark hair feathered out against the white pillow case. My eyes fell to her body; she was dressed in my hoodie that she told me was her favorite and a pair of my sweatpants. Her breathing was steady and her eyes closed as she huddled into my pillow. My heart ached.

I lowered myself onto the edge of the bed trying not to disturb my sleeping beauty. My eyes ran over her body and then like magnets they were drawn to her hands. A folded up piece of paper sat clutched in her closed palm. The letter. My letter.  She was tormenting herself, reliving my words and weak apology.

I crawled up the bed and rolled to my side, tucking my hand under my cheek and gazing at her. The smallest of frowns plagued her face and with a shaking hand I ran my thumb along the offending crease on her forehead. Her eyes flickered opened and focused on me. Her lips curled and an innocent brief smile greeted me.

“Do you want to eat?” I whispered into the darkness.

“I don’t want to go out,” she admitted softly.

“We can order pizza from downstairs if you like.” She nodded and I started moving until her hand caught my arm. I turned my head and looked back down at her. “What is it?”

“Can you just stay here for a few minutes?”

“Of course.”

I pulled my wallet and phone out of my pocket then dropped them on the side table and scooted up the bed to lay down beside her. She was now on her side, mimicking my body. I could tell she had been crying, and I knew she could see it my gaze. We remained silent; the only sound in my room was our ragged breathing. She raised her hand and cupped my cheek; my eyes slammed shut under her soft touch. She removed her hand after a few seconds and with one finger, she ran it softly, delicately over my lips, before tracing my jawline while her eyes completely devoured my face. I didn’t want to but I couldn’t help but think she was memorizing my face.

“I didn’t do this for me,” I whispered hoarsely.

“Why did you do it?”

“Because something had been taken from you. It was ripped from you, and you needed this. You needed to know you could live a normal life, a life where you could touch and be touched, where you could say no, where you could let someone in and learn to love. I needed to give you that because I felt like I was the one who ripped it away from you. When my letter was returned, I spiraled out of control. The blame was strangling me, and when I gave the police my statement, I made sure I told them everything and anything I could remember. He needed to burn for what he did and Douglas who is my father’s best friend made sure he did.”

She moved closer, and I rolled to my back to give her space. The last thing I wanted to do was push her. The moment I did, she shifted closer and laid her head on my chest, just above my heart like she always did. My arms circled her waist and pulled her taunt with my body.

“When my letter was returned I thought that was it. I thought I’d lost all chance of getting to you. I didn’t know what I’d do when I got to you, but I knew I just wanted to make sure you were safe. From the moment I found out about what had happened, it became my obsession. You became my obsession.”

This wasn’t going how I’d planned it.

“And then everything just happened. I met Ashlyn through Josh, and we instantly clicked. She knew who I was because of talk around campus after I made a statement to the police. It was about a year after that when I asked Ashlyn to check in on you and you two had a mutual friend on Facebook or something like that. Next thing I know I am talking to Tori on the phone to make sure you were okay.”

“Why?”

“Because I felt responsible. I felt like I needed to make sure the girl who I was meant to take home that night, who I was meant to take for hot chocolate and have the perfect date with was okay. If I hadn’t agreed to that stupid bet none of this would have happened. Maybe you would have said yes, maybe you would have said no and that would have been okay, but we will never know.”

“I would have said yes.”

“Please don’t say that.”

“What about the job? Was that all part of this?” She whispered into the darkness.

“Partially yes and partially no. I knew you were a photographer but I hadn’t seen any of your work. One day a package arrived on my desk with some photos of potential photographers for the shoot you just did but there wasn’t any names on the photos. I picked yours out from the bunch and that’s when I was informed that the work belonged to one Eden Rivers. The moment I realized I felt something set off inside of me. I wanted you here and I did everything in my power to get you here. Seeing you at Delights that night was completely random and then hearing you call yourself Kellie and being told the reasons why by Tori. Eden that fucking destroyed me and it was then that I came up with the crazy need to give you everything back. To give you everything you deserve and so much more.”

We fell into dark silence of my bedroom. I wasn’t sure how long we lay there, but she didn’t move from my chest, and I didn’t let her go. Eden lifted her head so her chin rested on my chest and she looked up at me. Her eyes flashed with a million shots of emotion before me.

“You were meant to be my December Eden, but you’ve become my absolute everything,” I whispered. “I can’t lose you. Please tell me what I can do to make this up to you.”

Her hand touched my jaw and she shifted her body up mine until our faces were barely an inch apart. “I don’t want any more secrets Ky. I don’t want you to feel any more guilt and I don’t want the past overshadowing anything anymore. If this is going to work, if you and I have any chance, we cannot have secrets.”

“I promise baby.”

“I’ve given you all of me Ky and I need you to give me all of you.” She continued and pressed one solitary kiss on my lips.

“You can have everything of me Eden. I will give you the world.”

“I don’t want the world Ky, I just want you.”

 

Contentment was an amazing life altering experience. It was the feeling of having your favorite blanket wrapped tightly around your shoulders. It was the perfect wake-up kiss in the morning and the tight loving hug before bed. It was knowing someone out there had your best interests at heart, who had your protection and safety in the palm of their hands. It was the feeling of complete and utter devotion that was fired to you with one simple look. Contentment seemed to now be known as Ky Crawford.

My time in New York was quickly coming to an end. Tomorrow was the fifth of January. It was the day that I was due to pack up my things and leave to go back to my life in San Francisco. Tomorrow was meant to be the day where I would say goodbye to this place and put a lid on the nightmares that still lingered in my dreams. It was meant to be the end of everything. I would be saying goodbye to Ky, and it had been the day that I had dreamed about since the moment he came up with the preposterous idea of our month together.

But last night as I lay in Ky’s protective arms with his heartbeat taking me to a place of peaceful unconsciousness, he had told me he wanted me to stay. He had given me his heart and gave me a reason to consider the unthinkable.

As the warm water of my morning shower trickled over my body that was still deliciously achy from the effects of morning sex with Ky, I couldn’t help but think of everything he had admitted to me. My mind was alive with the honesty that latched onto his every word as he delivered the most precious of embrace that was complimented with every treasured caress of his dominating hand.  The pits of my stomach rolled alive because tonight a decision would be made and the potential that hearts would be broken was the reality I faced.

Once I had finished my morning bathroom routine, I stumbled into the open space of the living room and finished braiding my hair over my shoulder. Winter sunshine filtered through the apartment and after being locked away from the world with Ky, I was looking forward to getting out of the apartment.

I felt like everything had shifted between us during those days spent entwined together. It had been just me and him. No interruptions, no distractions and no expectations.  After everything that had happened between us, it was like our solitary time was the stitches we needed to heal our gaping wounds, and it was the glue to stick our shattered pieces back together. We now possessed an honesty that was so deeply embedded within us and a brilliant truth that twisted around the very core that was Eden and Ky. Our fears and deepest regrets were shared, our promises were caressed in solidarity, and it was the beginning of something that scared me so beautifully.

I shook away the potential of fresh tears as I remembered our time together and grabbed my purse, phone, and spare key from the counter, locking the apartment behind me as I stepped out into the hall.

January was bitterly cold. As I stepped onto the sidewalk, the air swirled around and a thick chill forced me to pull my coat tighter.

I rushed down the path with a spring in my step toward the diner desperately aware that my morning hot chocolate and complimentary chocolate chip muffin that Carole would always give me was only minutes away.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket as the sudden urge to text Ky hit me.

Eden: You left without saying goodbye this morning. Not even a good morning kiss?

Ky: You seemed so peaceful that I didn’t want to wake you. I definitely kissed you. You even made that cute little noise you make.

Eden: I wish I had felt it.

Ky: Have you thought about what I asked last night?

Eden: It’s the only thing I’ve been thinking about.

Ky: Stay with me baby. I can’t lose you. I’ve just got you back.

I looked at my watch and debated on whether to go to Anderson Publications. I wanted to talk about this now. It was eating away at both of us. My feelings for him were insurmountable to anything I had felt before but could I really live here?

My internal battle was halted by the vibration of a new text message coming through. My heart race increased at the thought of what Ky would say now. I loved seeing Ky like this, Ky Crawford in his purest and honest form. The smile left my face the moment my eyes fell to the screen.

Unknown: Ready to go for a ride Eden?

Panic reared within me as every hair on my body rose in fear. My head swung around, back and forth, looking up and down the crowded sidewalk trying to locate the culprit but I also knew that evil always hid in the shadows.

People surrounded me, going about their day, talking in calm conversation, completely oblivious to the terror taking over my body.

In the distance I saw the safety of the diner and something within me told me that I needed to get to the security of those four walls as quickly as I could. My feet began to take me and my hands shook as I pressed Ky’s number into my phone.

I needed my protection.

He picked up after two rings, and I didn’t even give him a chance to speak.

With a rushed panic voice I whispered, “Ky, I got another message. It said did I want to go for a ride. I’m so scared I’m at the__”

My desperate pleas halted the moment my phone was snatched out of my hand. A strong hand gripped the back of my neck halting my movements and paralyzing me instantly. I was pulled against a stone like body and instantly I knew who had me.

“Guess who’s about to take your pussy for a ride.”

My heart twisted painfully in my chest the moment I heard the voice I wished I’d never hear again.

Jeremy Davis.

The frightening sound of the call ceasing shattered the air, and I knew Ky was gone. The pressure on my neck subsided and Jeremy slithered around until he stood in front of me with an evil smirk dripping with vindictiveness. Fear froze me as my eyes took him in.

My need to escape beat inside me, but my legs wouldn’t move.

“Do not move. Do not scream. Do not look at anyone, and I swear to fucking God if you say a word you will never speak again. Do you understand me?” Jeremy hissed into my ear.

I nodded in response.

“We are about to start walking and head toward my car, do you understand?”

Once against I nodded.

The air suddenly felt thick and wet and my lungs squeezed tightly in my chest as breathing became a chore. I stumbled, tripping on pebbled stones and the cracks in the uneven sidewalk as Jeremy held me close to his side, locking me in with his arm. His fingers dug viciously into my hip as he forced me away from the safety of society, away from a chance to run, and into a darkened alley that felt like a hallway leading to hell.

We reached a silver Honda complete with blacked out windows that sat hauntingly at the end of the alley. My brain screamed at me to run, but my legs felt like an endless weight held them down, planting them firmly to the dirty ground below. This couldn’t be happening.  My veins pulsated with fear, dread, and anger as the winter air swirled around me, stabbing my skin tauntingly; making me realize this was now my reality.

“You can’t do this again,” I seethed. My hands came up to his chest and with all of the strength I could muster I forcefully pushed myself away from his rigid body. His eyes flickered with fury at my blatant attempt at rebellion. A liberty I should never have taken. The force of his hand connecting with my cheek sent me stumbling. My back slammed into the car door and the edge of the metal pressed violently into my spine. I gasped in agony as a pain-induced haze immediately clouded my vision.

His body pressed against mine locking me in and flicks of spit hit my face as he roared, “I will do whatever the fuck I want, now get in the fucking car.”

He shoved me into the backseat of the car, and I landed on my hands and knees with a thud, thrown around like I was a piece of trash. I didn’t know whether it was his hand or foot that pushed me until I smacked into the opposite door with my face. I groaned and shifted until my back was against the leather seat. Jeremy slid in beside me, and the clicking noise of the lock sounded through the space; I was locked in with no escape. Confusion swam through my turbulent mind. Why was he in the backseat? I looked toward the front of the car at the same time the person sitting in the driver’s seat twisted around and my eyes met evil.

Chris Edwards sneered back at me.

“Surprise!” he taunted, maliciousness penetrating from his every pore. I sat there frozen, the ability to breathe, to think, to acknowledge escaped me as his eyes narrowed in on me.

The seat dipped beside me, and Jeremy’s body was soon hard against mine. Chris’s eyes shifted between both of us before he turned around and the roar of the engine startled me. My hands twisted in my lap, my fingers entwining, weaving their way together as I always did when I was nervous.

“Where are you taking me?”

Jeremy twisted to face me and with his finger and thumb he pinched my chin and forced me to look at him. I whimpered in pain at the death grip he possessed and tears pricked in my eyes. The monster looking at me had absolutely no life in his eyes and that was what scared me most.

“We are going to have some long overdue fun.”

••••

After a short drive filled with an unnerving silence, Chris pulled into the familiar parking lot of the motel I had stayed in when I first arrived. It was like a devastating case of déjà vu.

“Don’t you fucking say a word when we get out of this car. One word comes out of you, and I’ll fuck you twice as hard when we get inside. I will rip you to kingdom come.”

“You are a monster,” I hissed as I was vehemently pulled out of the car.

“Monster is a bit harsh don’t you think? I’d prefer to be called your worst nightmare.”

Jeremy slipped a threatening arm around my waist as we stepped through the entry doors of Hotel De Luca. My eyes darted around for someone familiar, but all I found were strangers going about their day. I thought we would head to the elevator, but I was shocked when we turned to the left and headed down the equally familiar hall toward the room I had stayed in, the very same room that had been broken into.

“Look familiar?” Jeremy spat as he pushed me through the door with a violent hand to my back. I stumbled forward, colliding with the corner of the wall and smashing my face. My cheek throbbed and my eyes watered as pain shot through me. Suddenly, I was jerked back with brutal force causing me to stumble and fall face first onto the unmade bed.

I flipped over quickly, wanting to keep my eyes on my predators. Chris lingered by the window, his focus on the outside world. Jeremy stood at the end of the bed, his hands clasped behind his head as if he was attempting to shove a sense of determination and fear in the air. A determination I refused to allow him to have, a fear I didn’t ever wish to feel again.

“Chris, tie her up. Hands behind her back,” Jeremy instructed.

I tore my gaze from Jeremy and watched Chris stalk toward me. Every step he took was heavy with arrogance and purpose. His hands fell to his belt buckle, and I swallowed the bile rising from the pits of my stomach as he fumbled with the clasp and pulled it so slowly out of the loops. He snapped it violently as he stood beside the bed and smirked at his grand prize.

A grand prize which was me.

“Fuck I am going to enjoy this,” he hissed brutally into my ear. His unforgiving hands ripped at my wrists and pulled them behind my back. My shoulders screamed at his force. The leather of the belt dug into me, burning the top layer of my skin as I fought the restraints. I shuddered as his tongue speared along the rim of my ear and along my jawline. My eyes remained fixed on the wall mounted television all the while chanting to myself. I will not break. I will not break.

“Back off asshole,” Jeremy growled from the end of the bed.

Chris pushed off the bed and took his position by the window again.

I didn’t know how long the standoff between Jeremy and I lasted. I sat back on my heels glaring at him, and he didn’t flinch. He made no attempts to touch me, to speak to me, to engage with me. I could see Chris hovering in the corning of my eye, but at that moment it was Jeremy who was in my sights.

I flicked my wrists behind me which only intensified the burning on my skin.

“Do your fucking worst Jeremy,” I hissed between clenched teeth, the standoff finally getting to me. The waiting and the anticipation of pain that was coming mixed with the confusion as to why he was pacing the room and preying on me like a rabid infested animal.

I was propped up against the head of the bed like I was some kind of fucking trophy and the longer he kept me waiting the quicker delusion set in.

Any fear I had escaped and now raw anger seethed through my pores. The thought of him touching me couldn’t become a reality. Just the thought of it forced me into protective mode, and a will to fight overcame me.

Finally I had something good happening in my life; I was finally on the path to living again. I had someone worth fighting for.

“You’ve gotten a backbone since I last saw you.” He stalked toward the bed and I noticed the gleam from the knife he had clasped in his hand. My breathing stilled. The thought that this could be how my life ended finally opened the doors and all of my fears and regrets trampled through.

Every single regret I experienced was at the hands of the man in front of me. That one act, four years ago, had put my life on a path of no return. I didn’t live. I was breathing, but I wasn’t living. I hadn’t been living until Ky came into my life. Just at the thought of him, I felt my emotions bubbling over. Ky was now my world, and I might not ever get the chance to tell him. He had spent the past four years in a world full of regrets and this would kill him. Jeremy didn’t just have the potential to ruin my life in his hands, but he had the potential to completely destroy Ky.

I needed to stop thinking about Ky.

Thinking about him would only distract me.

Jeremy hovered at the side of the bed where I sat. Suddenly I felt claustrophobic, as if the air was being sucked out of the vents and my attempts to breathe were halted. The moment he forced me into the car, I became his possession, yet it was his unpredictability that frightened me the most. I focused entirely on the sharp edge of the knife as Jeremy stalked threateningly toward me. My gasp rang through the room the moment the cold tip hit the skin on my jaw. With slow precision, he ran the knife back and forth along my jaw before it landed on my neck. The slightest of movement from his brutal hands would end my life.

“What do you want from me?” My voice came out weaker than I had anticipated, my façade fading fast. He immediately relished in my fear.

“What do we want from her cousin?” Jeremy sung out to Chris, his eyes never leaving me. Immediately my hands struggled for freedom, but it only tightened the belt. Chris now stood in the corner of the room, leaning against the wall closest to the window.

“I want her pussy.”

The air in the room suddenly became extinct as Chris’s words repeated over and over again in my head. I refused to break eye contact with him. I needed to find any strength I had left in my body as it slowly began to shut down and go into protective mode.

Jeremy took a step away from the bed as he unleashed his request into the room. “Undress her Chris. Down to the lingerie that I know the little slut is wearing.”

I felt my stomach churn.

“I enjoyed the set of your panties that Chris brought me as a gift when I left prison. I am surprised you didn’t miss them. I jack off to them every single fucking night. I cannot wait to pay you back for putting me in there. Do you understand what it was like? Four fucking years of my life gone because you couldn’t handle my fucking cock.”

“You raped me!” I screamed with the full power of my lungs. My body thrashed around the bed as rage pulsated through my veins. Screaming was now my defense mechanism, if I screamed loud enough someone would have to hear and come and find me. “Somebody! Anybody! Help! Get away from me you asshole!” I begged until my voice was hoarse.

“Shut your fucking mouth.” Jeremy’s hand pressed tightly around on my throat stealing my ability to breathe. I gagged as I desperately searched for air. My pulse beat frantically as my vision started fading in and out as unconsciousness swam toward me.

As I fell down the final steps to oblivion, Jeremy released my throat and I gasped as air flooded my craving lungs. “Strip and gag her,” Jeremy demanded to Chris.

Chris stalked across the room, his hungry eyes locked onto my breasts, until he stood at the foot of the bed.  My heart pounded urgently and my chest heaved as a constant reminder that I was still alive, and that I needed to fight. The moment his clammy hands touched my skin and ran over my bare arms, I roared to life. I couldn’t go down like this. Not again. I couldn’t be that girl for the second time.

My knee shot out and with every ounce of my strength I could muster the hardness of my knee cap collided between his legs, connecting with his balls with a strong snap. Chris collapsed onto the bed clutching his quickly bruising balls with his face twisting in agony.

“You fucking bitch,” he roared and flung himself at me. His clenched fist came toward my jaw as if it was in slow motion yet I still didn’t have time to brace myself for impact. The side of my jaw took the brunt of his attack and the metallic taste of blood filled my mouth as a pain so aggressive shot though me. “You try anything like that again, and I will break you. I will fuck you so hard that you’ll be no good to anyone. You hear me slut? You. Fucking. Hear. Me!”

“Get off her Chris,” Jeremy hissed from the end of the bed. With brute force he ripped Chris from my body by the back of his shirt. Chris crumbled on the floor and crawled to the chair in the far corner. He glared at me while he cupped his balls, massaging them so sickly that I had no clue whether it was because of his intent to carry through with his promise or because of the pain I had caused.

“Already causing trouble? I’ve got to admit I like this new feistiness. It’s going to make for some very enjoyable moments between us.” Jeremey stalked around the bed until he reached me. His hands slid up my thigh, over my hip, and disappeared under my shirt to rest on my stomach. “Do you remember what I said to you the last time we were in this situation?”

“Fuck you!”

“I told you that you were mine, and that hasn’t fucking changed,” he roared and spittle hit my face as the vein in his neck thundered with fury. “I’m going to make sure you never forget it again.”

I swallowed the lump of fear that made its way to my throat and awaited his next move. Jeremy’s malicious hands grabbed at my jeans, ripping them open and pushing them over my hips. The cool air swirled around the room and hit my bare stomach. The sound of buttons hitting the wall behind the bed sounded as Jeremy tore open my shirt and discarding it in one go.

I lay on the bed dressed only in my red lace panties and bra. With my hands bound I couldn’t even cover myself. His greedy eyes ran over my body. I froze as his hand ran up my thigh and lingered on my hip. Jeremy leaned over my body and his heavy breathing hit my core, the flimsy lace providing no barrier to his evil. He inhaled sharply, taking in my scent, and I cringed as his eyes rolled into the back of his head.

“I can’t wait to feast on you.” His hand slipped over the lace and he pressed down, rubbing his finger up and down my folds before his thumb pressed down on my covered clit. My eyes slammed shut in anger. “I wonder what your boyfriend would think of this.”

At the mere mention of Ky my eyes flung open in rage. I didn’t want Ky tarnished by Jeremy. I had to protect myself even if it meant getting hurt in the process. Distraction would be my best friend.

“You want to know what my boyfriend would think. He’d think that you are a fucking asshole who can’t get a chick unless you rape her. You are a pathetic piece of shit Jeremy Davis, and you will not get away with this again. Ky will be looking for me and when he finds me, I hope with everything I am he gives you exactly what you deserve.”

I felt the snap of my rib as soon as his elbow hit into my side at full force. I gasped in pain and my body convulsed under the pressure raising me from the mattress momentarily. My back hit the mattress as warm tears flooded my cheeks. Waves of intense pain rolled through me and finally crashed as my breath came back.

“Don’t fucking mention him again,” Jeremy hissed. He ripped my discarded shirt clean apart and shoved a piece of the material in my mouth, taking my ability to draw attention to myself and making my chance of rescue fade quickly away.

The pain, the lack of oxygen, and the fear taking over my body brought on a darkness that I craved; before I could struggle any longer I slipped into oblivion with Jeremy and Chris lingering devastatingly close.