Текст книги "Beautifully Insightful"
Автор книги: K.C. Lynn
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Текущая страница: 12 (всего у книги 20 страниц)
Chapter 15
Emily
Later that evening I wake up with a minor headache from the cry fest I had earlier. I literally cried until exhaustion gripped ahold of me and didn’t let go. I slept most of the day away. Looking around, I see Summer isn’t with me, and a blanket is draped over my body that wasn’t there before. I quickly realize Ryder must have come in to check on me. Guilt instantly plagues me as I think about what I said to him earlier. I don’t want to keep bringing up the past. I really do believe he only left because he felt like he had no other choice, but I still have so many scars from all of it. I’m terrified to trust him and give him my heart again. Although, I fear he already has it. I think he always has.
The sound of soft male murmurs, coming from outside my bedroom, pulls me from my thoughts. Getting up, I throw on my cozy, grey wool cardigan over top of my camisole and sleep shorts then take a quick glance in the mirror and groan at my appearance. Good grief, I look like hell. Knowing there is nothing I can do about my swollen, puffy eyes, I run my fingers through my sleep-tumbled hair, trying to tame the craziness, then head out of my bedroom to see who’s here.
As I walk down the hall, I instantly recognize the other male voice as Nick’s. I stop at the edge of the living room to see both him and Ryder on the couch, their heads bent over a piece of paper as they quietly talk back and forth. A half-eaten box of pizza sits on the coffee table in front of them, and I’m happy to know Ryder hasn’t starved the entire time I’ve been sleeping.
I have to admit both men are lethal to a girl’s hormones, especially when in the same room together. Nick may not make my heart beat faster, the way Ryder does, but he’s definitely in the same class when it comes to his looks. He also has tattoos, and is built much the same as Ryder – tall and lean with solid muscle. His brown hair is darker than Ryder’s, and where Ryder’s eyes are green, Nick’s are a unique grey color with a hint of blue. Both men exude a lethal confidence that seems threatening, yet at the same time makes me feel safe.
Summer sits on the floor next to Ryder’s feet, her chin propped up on his knee while his fingers run through her fur. The sight of them warms my heart.
I clear my throat awkwardly, suddenly feeling like I’m intruding. Both heads snap up and Ryder’s eyes immediately collide with mine. My heart pinches at the guilt on his expression, knowing I’m the one who put it there. “Hey,” I greet lamely.
“Hey, Em.” His reply is soft and we watch each other for a long moment, a silent exchange happening between us. I’m not sure what it is but it has my throat feeling tight. I tamp it down, since I have done enough crying over the last two days to last me a lifetime.
I look away and over at Nick. “Hey, Nick.”
“Hi, Emily.”
Summer comes over and I lean down to pet her. “Hi, baby. Sorry I slept the day away. You’re probably in major need of a washroom break and exercise.”
“I’ve been with her in the back most of the day, throwing the ball around,” Ryder says, bringing my gaze back to him. “I know it’s not a very big space, but I tired her out pretty good.”
That explains her being so close with him moments ago; she normally isn’t really affectionate with people, other than Rosa and me. Especially those she doesn’t know well. “Thank you.”
He nods and Nick clears his throat, breaking our moment. “I brought a list of names that Cassie gave her school counselor. I was hoping you could go over them and tell us how many you know, if any at all?”
“Oh, uh sure, but, um, I can’t…”
“I’ll help you, Em,” Ryder breaks into my stammering, knowing what I was about to say.
“Okay, thanks.” They both move to make room for me, so I take that as my cue and go sit between them.
“I’ve recognized a few,” Ryder says.
“Really? Who?”
“Prescott.”
“Kyle?” I ask aghast.
“No, his father, but it wouldn’t surprise me if that prick is involved in all of this too. I mean, just look at the shit he pulled with you back in high school, or hell, what I walked in on yesterday.” His jaw flexes in anger.
I remember that time vividly, and realize he’s right; Kyle is very capable of something like this. “Anyone else on the list you recognize?”
“Other than your father, just one more.” His cautious tone has my nerves even more on edge.
“Who?”
“Paul Kensington.”
I gasp. “Cece’s father?” He nods. “Oh my god.” I drop my head in my hands; my heart breaking because I know this is going to kill Cece when it all comes out. She is so close with her father. He’s always been so protective over her; he would kill anyone who hurt her. How could he possibly hurt someone else’s daughter?
“I’m sorry, Em,” Ryder says regretfully while his hand finds its place on my back. His comforting touch brings a small measure of peace to my heavy heart.
“I know,” I reply quietly, then blow out a deep breath and pull myself together so he can go through the list of names. He reads off at least twenty. There are a lot I don’t know, but a few I do. They are men who I have been in the same room with many times before. Politicians, judges, lawyers – men who are in positions of power and who are supposed to help protect our country, not corrupt it. The last name he says is a big one: Archer Benedict. “You know he’s the Attorney General, right?”
Ryder frowns. “No, I didn’t, but this is the first time I’ve seen his name mentioned in all of this.”
I nod. “He and my father have been friends for a long time. His nephew is also the Chief of Police.”
“What?” he snaps in shock. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure, and before his nephew it was his cousin or something.” He exchanges a look with Nick.
“Well now we know how it’s been kept quiet for so long, and the quick ruling of last night’s events,” Nick says, making me confused.
“What do you mean last night?”
“The shooting was on the news earlier. They’re saying it was gang related.”
“Well maybe it was.”
I can tell they don’t believe it. “No, Em, even if they suspected this was gang related they wouldn’t rule it out that quick, especially without seeking us out and talking to us first.”
“Maybe no one told them about us being there, Ryder. Have you thought about that?” I ask, a little panic-stricken, grasping at anything so I don’t have to think those bullets were meant for Ryder or me.
“I spoke to the doctor today.” My attention swings back to Nick as he cuts in. “He thought I was a cop with the Atlanta PD since I was asking questions. He asked me if we found you guys. He had told one of the officers about speaking with the two of you, and seeing you guys leave just before the cops got there.
Defeat washes over me. I close my eyes and drop my head back against the couch. On top of this entire horrific situation, I now have to come to terms with the possibility that someone attempted to kill me last night. Why? What do I have to do with any of this? Is Ryder right and it’s my father, or is it someone else? The thought that it could be my father, and that he hates me this much, has a sharp pain slicing through me.
I sense someone hovering over me, seconds before I hear the door closing. Opening my eyes, I stare into Ryder’s intense, green gaze. His hands are on either side of my hips, and his face is only a breath from mine. I quickly realize we are alone and Nick just left. “Talk to me, Em.”
“I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that someone hates me enough that they want me dead, and that person could be my father.” My throat begins to ache. “I’m left with a million questions as to why, and the scary truth is, if he wants me dead, he will make it happen.”
Cupping my face, he drops his forehead to mine. “No one’s going to hurt you, Em, I fucking promise I will not let anything happen to you.” His eyes burn with intensity and his words ring with truth. “Tell me you believe me, baby. Tell me you trust me to take care of you.”
I think about the way he ran at me yesterday. The way he jumped into action at a moment’s notice, and the fact that he took a bullet to save my life. “I do,” I whisper truthfully. No matter what has happened between us, there is no one else in this world I feel safer with than him.
“Good.” He leans in and briefly presses his warm lips against my cheek. I get the urge to wrap my arms around his neck but I hold myself back. “We are going to figure this out, Em. I promise.”
“How? I know you want in that charity function, but that’s two weeks away.”
“Nick has a few things he’s checking into, and in the meantime I have a few ideas of my own we can start with.”
“What’s that?”
“How much do you think Rosa might know about all of this?”
I rear back, shocked by his question. I open my mouth to quickly reject the thought, but then snap it shut and think about the possibility. Rosa has been with my parents a long time, she’s worked those charity functions for years. Could she know? Or at least suspect?
“She was one of the people who told me you were in danger if I didn’t leave. She said I had no idea what your father was capable of,” he adds, shocking me again.
“I want to say she knows nothing, because I believe she would try to stop it if she knew.”
“She’s scared, and by that I mean fucking terrified. I saw her fear all those years ago, and I saw it again earlier today when your parents showed up.”
Scared? I think about the way she has always obeyed my parents, yet still secretly did what was in my best interest, even if it went behind their backs. I always thought it was because she didn’t want to lose her job, but maybe it is because she’s scared. The thought breaks my heart.
“I don’t think she will tell me shit, but I’m hoping she might open up with you.”
“I’ll try. I can call her tomorrow to see if she can come by, or we can go see her.”
He nods. “I think it’s a good place to start.”
“Okay, and if she doesn’t know anything? What will be the next step?”
He watches me a moment, as if weighing some sort of internal battle. “That’s enough for one night. Let’s just take it one step at a time.”
I think about arguing because I can tell he has something else in mind, but I decide against it. I’m not sure how much more I can withstand for tonight. My head feels like it’s about to explode and I’m exhausted despite the fact I just slept most of the day away.
“You’re probably starving.” He reaches back and grabs the pizza box. I shake my head; my stomach is in too many knots to eat anything right now. His eyes narrow disapprovingly. “You need to eat something, Emily, you haven’t eaten all day.”
“I’m not hungry, Ryder!” I snap, not appreciating his bossy tone. We glare off, but I quickly realize I won’t win this. I roll my eyes and take a slice of pizza. He grins smugly at his victory and it makes me want to slap his sexy face.
We sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes until he breaks it. “Do you mind if I use your shower?”
Heat immediately pools low in my tummy at the thought of him naked in my shower. Oh lord, don’t go there, Emily. “Of course,” I say easily, trying to act like my mind wasn’t just in the gutter. Clearly I don’t do a good job of it by the smirk he gives me. I hate that stupid smirk… “I don’t have any soap or shampoo that doesn’t smell girly though, sorry.” I give him a smug smile back, not really all that sorry.
“Doesn’t matter, I have my own. Stone brought me my bag.” He winks at me, jacking up my annoyance another notch.
“Glad to know you just assumed I was going to allow you to stay here.”
“You didn’t have a choice in the matter.” He stands up and grabs a black duffle bag that sits by the door then turns back to me, his smirk spreading. “You want to join me, Em?”
Oh god… My cheeks heat at the idea and an ache starts between my legs. He chuckles, knowing his affect on me, which really annoys me. He walks away, not bothering to wait for a response, probably because he’s smart enough to know the answer.
Hearing the shower turn on, I grab the blanket at the end of the couch then lay down and try not to think about him in there. Wet, glistening, water dripping down his abs… ugh! I huff, annoyed with myself, then look over at Summer. “I’m in serious trouble, girl.”
Chapter 16
Ryder
I shut off the water thirty minutes later with my dick still hard as fuck even though I just jacked off twice. Emily’s scent surrounding me made it impossible not to, but it brought no relief. Only she can sate this intense need rushing through me. I consider what my chances are of being allowed to sleep in the same bed as her tonight, but I assume it’s not great. Getting out, I re-bandage my ribs then throw on a pair of athletic pants and decide to forgo a shirt.
As I walk out of the bathroom I can’t help but smirk, knowing the blush I will see on her pretty face from that decision. “Hey, did you want to watch a movie or…” I trail off when I get to the living room and see her fast asleep. Seriously… Again?
My annoyance vanishes when I take in her vulnerable state. Her innocent face should be soft with sleep but instead is furrowed with worry. The pale blue marks under her eyes are a good indication of how hard the last few days have been on her, or hell, the last month. The dog lays curled up behind her legs, surprisingly fitting in the small space. Her chin rests on Emily’s knee and her eyes raise at me, as if wondering what the fuck I’m doing just standing here watching them.
Dropping my bag at the side of the couch I lean down and pick up Em, cradling her delicate body in my arms. She stirs only enough to snuggle her face closer into my chest. The dog follows close behind me as I make my way into her room, which is dimly lit from the lamp she left on. I decide to lay her on top of the bed instead of turning down her covers, not wanting to wake her. I cover her with the blanket I had used previously as she snuggles into her pillow. The dog jumps up and curls in next to her. Lucky bastard. Not being able to hold back, I lean down and press a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Night, Em.”
She expels a sigh as I stand back up, and just as I turn to leave she mumbles: “I love you.”
My heart stops and I spin back around to see she’s still fast asleep. Was she talking about me? Looking at the dog, I realize it’s likely she was talking about her. I shake my head, pissed at myself for acting like a pussy, then turn off her lamp and close the door, leaving it open just a crack.
Heading back to the living room, I get myself settled in for another long night, wishing I were lying next to Emily and not on this fucking couch alone. I know she’s hurting and I fucked up. I’m going to give her time, but not much. I will prove to her she is mine. That is my last thought before I slip into a deep slumber.
Sometime in the middle of the night I’m awoken by a blood-curdling scream. I shoot off the couch, my heart pounding in fear when I register it’s coming from Em.
Grabbing my gun, I race down the hall and plow into her room. It’s completely black, her scream still piercing through the air. Flicking on the light, I see her on the floor, huddled in a corner. I take in our surroundings, training my gun around the room, only to see there is no one here.
I rush over and kneel down in front of her, then frame her tear-streaked face in my hands. “Hey, hey, Em. Baby, what’s wrong, what happened?”
She finally snaps out of her hysterics and it takes her a moment to register me. She looks around the bright room, a little disorientated, before her watery gaze comes back to mine. “Who turned off my light?”
“What?” I ask through heavy breathing, my heart still pounding like a fucking drum.
She starts sobbing. “Someone turned off my light!”
“I did.”
“I sleep with it on, I don’t like the dark.”
The memory of the way she reacted in the theatre when the lights went down suddenly pops into my head, and my stomach instantly twists with guilt. “Fuck, I’m so sorry, baby.”
She drops her head in her knees and cries harder. “I was so scared when I woke up and couldn’t see.”
Picking her up, I cradle her trembling body in my arms then sit on the bed, bringing her down on my lap. I hold her close and apologize repeatedly, feeling like complete shit. She calms down a few minutes later and tries to pull away, looking embarrassed, but I don’t let her.
Cupping her face, I force her to look at me, and the emotion in her eyes hit me like a punch to the gut. “I’m so fucking sorry,” I say again for the thousandth time.
“It’s okay. You didn’t know,” she whispers. “It’s just… I lived in the dark for so long, Ryder, and the thought of being forced back into it is terrifying. I know I said my life was easier before, but…” Her breath catches and she shakes her head, frustrated. “Never mind, it makes no sense.”
“Yeah, baby, it does. It makes complete sense.”
She gives me a sad smile. “Sorry I worried you.”
Worried is a major fucking understatement; she scared the living shit out of me. But I keep that to myself, not wanting to make her feel worse. “It’s okay.”
Leaning over, I turn back on her lamp then I stand up to shut off the light. She startles from the sudden movement and quickly wraps her arms around my neck. I walk us back over to the bed then turn down her covers before laying her down and stretching out next to her. She tenses in surprise. “Let me hold you for tonight, Em,” I whisper, not wanting to be away from her. “Please, baby. Just this, nothing else, I promise.”
She relents with a sigh then turns on her side to face me. I don’t hold back from wrapping my arm around her waist and pulling her in close. “Tell me about you,” she whispers.
“What do you want to know?”
She shrugs. “Anything and everything. What have you been doing the last six years? What made you decide to become an FBI Agent and not a motorcycle shop owner?” She gives me a sassy smirk, throwing my cover back in my face. I’ll take it because it’s better than her being pissed at me.
I take a deep breath and try to figure out where to start. “When I moved to Florida I wasn’t exactly sure what I wanted to major in. I was so pissed and fucked up after leaving you that I thought about not even going to college.” Pain flashes in her eyes, the same pain that I felt all those years ago. I quickly move on, not wanting to dwell on that part. “I actually considered joining the Army, but after all the effort Mrs. Johnson went through to get me there I figured I owed it to her to at least take a couple of courses. One of them was criminology, and not only did I end up liking it but I kicked ass at it.” She smiles. “I don’t know how to explain it but I knew right away I wanted to do something along the lines of law enforcement. I thought about looking into a few different police departments to find out exactly what I needed, but before I could Professor Roth approached me. He asked if I had ever thought about looking into the FBI. When I got back to my dorm I researched the hell out of it and knew it was what I wanted to do. It’s not easy to get into, they get thousands of applicants, but I got lucky because my Professor knew someone over there. Frank Reynolds, who is now my boss, saw my grades and brought me into the internship program. I worked my ass off to prove myself, and I guess it paid off because here I am.”
She watches me with her smile still in place. “I’m not surprised. I always knew whatever you did you would kick ass at.” Her words have me feeling all sorts of shit. “So what exactly do you do, Officer Jameson?” she asks with a smile.
“It’s Special Agent Jameson, baby.”
She arches a brow doubtfully. “Special Agent?”
“Yeah, the FBI is a little different. We aren’t referred to as officers. Check my badge if you don’t believe me.”
“That’s all right. I’ll take your word for it.”
I smirk. “Does that make you hot, Em.”
“Hardly,” she replies dully, but her blush gives her away.
I chuckle. “To answer your original question at what I do, I work in the Criminal Investigative Division.”
“Which means what exactly?” she asks, seeming genuinely interested.
“It means we deal with numerous types of investigations. It could be financial crime, violent crime, organized crime, public corruption, and violation of individual civil rights. There’s a lot.”
She watches me for a moment, her expression suddenly somber. “What category does my father fall into?”
I think of how to answer. I don’t want to make her feel worse but I decide to tell her the truth. “Honestly, if he’s guilty of everything he’s suspected of then he falls under a whole bunch of shit.”
“He’s probably going to prison for a long time, isn’t he?”
The sadness in her voice has me feeling like shit. The truth of the matter is, if he’s convicted of what I suspect he’s done, he will be lucky if life in prison is all he gets. “Yeah, baby, probably.”
She nods sadly. “I know he deserves it. What he’s doing is horrible, but there’s a small part of me, deep inside, that feels bad. I know I shouldn’t, he’s never cared about me, but I can’t seem to help it.”
“You care because you’re a good person, it’s just how you’re wired, Em.” She’s definitely a better person than me, because I don’t give a shit about my parents. She stays silent, but burrows her face into my chest. I quickly register her silent tears against my skin. Pulling her in closer, I kiss the top of her head. “Everything will be okay, Em. I promise I’ll help you get through this.”
I feel her nod, and that’s the last of our conversation. It isn’t long before I feel her breathing even out and her body relax. Even though there are thousands of reasons why I shouldn’t, I can’t help but feel a peace I haven’t felt in over six years. One only Emily has ever been able to bring me.
