Текст книги "Love's Secret Torment"

Автор книги: Stacy L. Darnell

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Текущая страница: 2 (всего у книги 17 страниц)

Junior year was one of the happiest years of my life. Alec was always sweet and made me laugh. We spent hours talking and it seemed like we learned something new about each other every day.

We dressed up as Jack Skellington and Sally from the movie A Nightmare Before Christmas for Heather’s Halloween party.

When Thanksgiving came, we each had dinner with our own families, and the next day, Alec took me Black Friday shopping for one of those digital photo frames for my parents for Christmas, earning him “The Most Patient Guy Ever” award.

We were talking one afternoon during one of our park dates under the shade of our tree. The sun was peeking through the clouds as I lay on the blanket with my head in his lap. He played with my hair, one of my favorite things. I loved the feel of it as his fingers twirled around the long strands.

I enjoyed going to the park with Alec. I brought a small, insulated basket with bottled water, pastrami sandwiches, and fresh fruit I bought from Mrs. Barrett at the street market that morning. Every free day we had was spent at the park. We never went to his house.

I’d heard that he lived with his aunt. I wanted to ask about his parents, but I always felt his profound sadness on the rare occasion when he mentioned them, which was always followed by a quick subject change.

“I love nature and being outside. It’s my favorite place to be. What about you?” he asked as he lifted my hand to his mouth and kissed each finger, making me feel lightheaded.

“Oh, you know, I love nature, too. Breathing in the fresh air and seeing the birds fly and listening to their songs. Lying under the stars and dreaming. My favorite part of the day though, is walking Gage around the neighborhood or taking him to the dog park.”

“What’s your favorite subject in school so far this year? Mine is definitely English.”

“Hmm, how about any class with you?” I giggled. “So I guess that means English and Algebra are tied since we have them together. You know, I could see you as an English teacher someday.”

When he didn’t respond, I looked up at him. He was staring straight ahead like he hadn’t heard me.

“Alec? Did you hear what I said?”

He finally looked down at me and smiled, but it didn’t look like his normal smile. “Yeah, sorry. I guess I was . . . lost in thought.”

“It’s okay, I, umm, need to head back home to study for a science exam I have this week,” I murmured.

“Okay.”

We packed everything up and headed back to my house.

Sometimes I wasn’t sure what to make of him. He liked to have fun and was the most carefree person I knew. But other times, he seemed guarded. Like there was a piece of him he wasn’t willing or ready to share. It showed at school in the way he acted when teachers thought he wasn’t paying attention. I knew full well he was, but he was also somewhere else in his mind or heart, somewhere he kept closed off from me. I hoped that he would trust me enough to let me in someday.

During one of our afternoon park dates, we had eaten lunch, and were lying under our tree. Alec finally asked me the question he’d evaded answering during our first date at the café so long ago.

“Why did you decide to make and donate your jewelry to the charity auction?”

I curled into his arms as we lay there. Birds were chirping in the trees as I gathered my thoughts.

“A few years ago, my cousin, Jolie, was driving home from a party drunk. She blew through a stoplight and hit a car head-on. The accident was indescribable. I still don’t know how they were able to separate the cars. The couple in the car she hit had been celebrating their first wedding anniversary. The husband lived, but his wife died instantly. Unlike in most drunk driving accidents, so did Jolie. I miss her terribly.”

Alec handed me a napkin from the basket and I wiped at the tears as I cried.

“We’d always been close, more like friends than cousins. She never made me feel like a little girl the way everyone else did. Anytime we had the chance, we’d watched movies together, or she’d style my hair and do my make-up. My mom and Aunt Olivia, Jolie’s mom, always laughed at the mischief we got into.

Aunt Olivia tours the country, speaking at high schools. She talks about the consequences of drinking and driving. About Jolie, and the couple she hit. How it changed the husband’s life and affected the families of all those left behind. I lowered my eyes so he couldn’t see the hurt and inhaled deeply. “I miss her so much. I wish she never got into that car. There’s never an actual ‘okay enough to drive,’ ya know. I mean, if someone’s been drinking then they just shouldn’t drive. Period.”

Alec was so sweet, he hugged me close. “I’m so sorry for your loss, Samone.”

But when I asked him the same question, his answer stole the breath from my lungs. “So why were you helping set up that day at the charity?”

His eyes lost some of their light, and his mood turned somber. It was so slight, I would’ve missed it if I hadn’t been staring at his handsome face. He reached down and caressed my face with one hand, while the fingers of his other played in my hair. It felt like he was seeking comfort or strength. I think he needed both.

“Samone, do you remember when our sophomore year started, and I wasn’t there at the beginning?”

“Yes, you came after Labor Day, I think. I remember Heather talking about ‘the smoking-hot, new guy’ in her English Lit class.” I giggled. “Hadn’t you just moved here?”

“Yeah . . . but it wasn’t a good move. Believe me, I’m happy we did move here, specifically because of you. But my older brother, Emjay and I moved up here from Southwest Florida. Just before my sixteenth birthday, my mom and dad were . . .”

He paused and looked down at me, caressing my face. His brow scrunched together and his chin began to quiver. I knew this wasn’t going to be good, and I didn’t want to cause him pain.

“Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to tell me if it’s going to upset you.”

“No, Samone, I want to tell you. I want you to know all about me, because I want to know all about you, too. I don’t want us to have any secrets.”

He pulled my hand up and pressed his lips to the top of it, weaving his fingers through mine as he continued his story.

“My parents were on their way home from the airport. My dad had gone to pick up my mom. She’d been visiting her sister, my Aunt Robin, here in Atlanta. She had a late flight. They were at a stoplight when a drunk driver going eighty-five miles an hour hit their car.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. It felt like a bag of rocks had settled in my stomach. I lay there frozen in his arms as he went on.

“The coroner said that Dad died instantly. But Mom didn’t. When the ambulance got there, she was alert and begging my dad not to leave her and their boys.” He leaned his head back and pinched the bridge of his nose. “They had to use the jaws-of-life to get to her, and by the time they did, she was gone, too. My best friend’s dad was one of the EMTs on the scene, and he told my brother and me later that she died holding Dad’s hand.” His breath caught. “And her last words were ‘Tell my boys I love them.’” He squeezed my hand and looked up to the sky. “The drunk driver lived and is now serving a sentence at a state prison in Florida.”

I couldn’t breathe, and my chest hurt as I watched the tears flow freely down Alec’s face. As my own tears fell, he held my hand tighter.

“Since Emjay was eighteen, I was able to stay with him. Mom and Dad both had hefty life insurance policies. Our inheritance was enough to get us moved up here with Aunt Robin. We still each have money for college with savings left over.”

He gazed down at me as I gently rubbed my thumb over his fingers.

“But we both had to get the hell out of that town. Everyone was nice and helpful, but everywhere we looked, we saw pity in people’s eyes. Just when we’d have a day we were able to get through without falling completely apart, all it took was those sorrowful looks from neighbors or the postman. It would bring it all crashing back. It made the pain of losing Mom and Dad even worse.”

Alec startled me when he jumped up and leaned against the tree.

“I’ve never been able to talk about this with anyone before.”

“I’m so sorry, Alec. You must think I am such a baby for being so sad and missing Jolie like I do since she was the drunk driver in her accident.” I choked on a sob.

“No, no . . . definitely not,” he said as he sat back down and held me close, kissing the top of my head.

“In life, no matter the cause or who’s at fault, all deaths leave wounded hearts and broken loved ones behind. People make mistakes; it’s part of living, Samone. But it doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t mourn them when they’re gone.”

His words choked me up. They reached into my soul and made me feel whole and hollow all at the same time. It was like he spoke out of one of his old English poetry books. But I knew the words came from his soul directly to touch and heal mine.

“I love you, Alec,” I whispered.

He smiled down at me. “Love you always.”

How he could have experienced the devastating loss of his parents and still hold compassion in his heart amazed me and left me in awe of him. I realized then that this incredibly sexy, sweet guy was also a beautiful old soul, and I was so grateful that he was mine.

Our love continued to grow with each day. As the summer before our senior year came to an end, Alec surprised me with something I’d always dreamed of. The sound of tapping woke me up. I cracked my eyes open, waiting for everything to come into focus. The sun peeked through my bedroom curtains. It was such a beautiful morning. Shaking my head with a wry smirk, I crawled off the bed, knowing only one person would be plinking pebbles at my window.

I shuffled to my window and spread the curtains wide. Smiling up at me was my Alec. I didn’t know how it was possible and had never experienced anything like it in my life, but damn, I loved him.

He waved me down, and I noticed he had a Starbucks cup in his hand. He knew me too well. I was a coffee and hot tea junkie and thanked God every single day that we had a Starbucks within five miles from anywhere in town. I threw my bathrobe on over my sleep shorts and tank top and ran downstairs to see what my sweet guy was up to.

“Hi baby,” I said as I wrapped my arms around him and my body molded into his.

“Good morning Samone,” he said back as he smiled. “I have a surprise for you,” he chuckled, knowing how I loved surprises, especially from him.

“Tell me please, please, please. Alec, don’t make me wonder this time. I’m dying to know.”

He handed me my crème brûlée latte, bringing a smile of appreciation to my face.

“How about I just give you a hint?” He smiled down at me and squeezed me tight.

“Oh, okay” I drew out the last word before I took a drink.

“It’s such a nice day, and the sky is so clear, I thought looking at the mountains would be amazing from a higher vantage point.”

“Hmm, cryptic much?” I pouted.

“Why don’t you go inside, grab a shower, and get dressed, maybe a light sweater would be a good idea, too.”

A light sweater? Was he crazy? It was in the high seventies outside, not hot, but certainly not cold enough for a sweater. In fact, it was my favorite time of year. It was absolutely beautiful outside.

I ran inside and showered. I dressed in my favorite jeans and his worn Falcons t-shirt. It was so comfortable, and I was going to keep it as long as possible. My sweater caught my eye as I walked out of my closet. I shook my head and grabbed it before leaving my room.

When I walked downstairs, Alec was having a cup of coffee with my mom and dad. They were outside, my parents at the porch table and Alec sitting on our swing, all of them laughing. He patted the seat beside him, and I walked over and sat down. When he handed me my latte, I smiled knowing he’d heated it in the microwave for it to still be nice and hot.

“Well we better get going, Samone. Mr. and Mrs. Lang, always a pleasure.” He kissed the top of my mom’s hand and shook my dad’s.

Mom laughed. “Alec, you’re such a charmer.”

“You kids have a great time today,” my dad replied as he slipped a folded paper into Alec’s fist when they shook hands goodbye.

I looked at Alec, curious what that was all about.

We drove for about forty-five minutes. I watched out the windows, looking for some clue to where we were going. Finally, we came to a field with a lone warehouse and something I couldn’t quite make out in the distance. The sign, however, answered my ever-growing curiosity, and I squealed with glee.

“We’re going on a hot air balloon ride!”

He chuckled as he pulled his truck up into the parking area.

We went inside, and he signed us in as Alec Morris and Samone Lang. I smiled as my mind flashed to the inside tab of my school folder where I had doodled Mrs. Samone Morris about a thousand times.

We took a seat in the waiting area. Alec rested his hand on my thigh as I flipped through an issue of Travel and Leisure they had in a magazine rack. The man behind the counter called our names, and we walked up and had to show our ID’s. It was then Alec pulled out the folded piece of paper my dad had handed him. It was a parental consent form since I was still seventeen. I looked up at him and he winked. Smartass always thought of everything.

The man led us outside behind the warehouse, and we rode in a little golf cart out to the large object I couldn’t quite make out earlier. It was a hot air balloon. They were just now lighting the fire in the basket to begin filling the balloon with air while it laid on its side on the ground. As another man walked over, I smiled up at Alec and squeezed his hand. He kissed the top of my head.

“I love you,” he whispered in my hair.

“I love you right back.”

The new man was introduced to us as our pilot. We listened to the safety rules, and when he finished, I looked over and saw that the balloon was fully upright. Holy hell . . . it was gigantic. My heart started hammering with anticipation, and I could hardly wait to get in the basket and start our ride.

He squeezed my hand in his. “Are you excited?”

“Yes, I can’t wait! Oh Alec, this is the best! Thank you so much for this amazing surprise!”

We followed the pilot in, and as the balloon rose, the earth grew smaller. When I shivered in the cool air, Alec helped me into my sweater. Wow, he really did think of everything. He rubbed my arms, and hugged me close as we looked out over Georgia. The landscape was beautiful. There were green trees everywhere. We sailed over Red Top Mountain and Allatoona Lake. I’d never realized it before, but it wasn’t shaped like a typical lake. It was a big body of water, but it weaved through the land like a finger tracing a squiggly line. As we drifted toward Fort Mountain, there were ponds and smaller lakes scattered about the land. We saw baseball, soccer, and football fields. The cars and trucks seemed so small from the balloon. It truly felt like we were floating on a cloud, and the sky was clear and beautiful.

We were in visual range and saw Fort Mountain. It was even more breathtaking from that vantage point. He pointed out a lake we’d camped near once. Alec held my hand in his and we talked of our plans for after graduation and watched the birds flying below us. He pointed to different landmarks and noted where we were gliding above.

“I have an idea. What if, after we graduate, instead of staying on campus at Kennesaw State, we got an apartment together? My inheritance is enough that it would cover the cost of a simple apartment. We wouldn’t need anything fancy.” Alec said.

“Oh, yes!” I squealed.

“Do you think your parents will be okay with us living together?”

“Well I’ll be eighteen then, and they’ve always encouraged me to follow my heart. Plus, it helps that they adore you.”

I was so excited I couldn’t wait to start looking at ads in the newspaper. I just hoped Mom and Dad would go for it. Alec was serious about school, so I knew it wouldn’t get in the way of my studies.

I hoped we’d get accepted at Kennesaw State.

“Have you chosen a major yet?” I asked him.

“Yeah, English, I think. I’m sure you’re not surprised.” He laughed. “I’ve always wanted to be a teacher, and you know English is my favorite subject, so it just makes sense. I’ll do something that encompasses the things I like best. My dad always said if you love your job, that’s more than half the battle of life since you spend so much time of your day doing it. What about you?”

“I think I’m going to study psychology. I’ve always wanted to help people, and there are so many psychological illnesses. It’s misunderstood, and a lot of people need help with it. I’d like to help them have live happier everyday lives and feel better.”

He smiled at me with that grin of his. “Samone, you’ll make the best psychologist ever, I can’t imagine anyone with a bigger or more caring heart.”

When the ride ended, it felt too soon, and I didn’t want the trip to be over. We thanked the pilot for an amazing excursion, and Alec drove us to our park.

With the excitement of my surprise, I hadn’t noticed the cooler in the back of his truck. As he grabbed it, I picked up the blanket and small basket sitting beside it.

We walked over to our oak tree, which was thankfully clear of people. Spreading the blanket on the ground, I opened the basket as Alec pulled bottles of water out of the cooler, an apple, pastrami sandwiches, and a small baggie of cheddar cheese cubes. We sat and ate our lunch together under our tree. After we finished, Alec leaned back against the tree and I lay down with my head in his lap. He combed his fingers through my hair with the most delicate touch. Between the balloon ride and our lunch under the tree, it was the most beautiful day ever . . . one I would never forget.

The next morning, Tricia came into town for Jolie’s memorial dinner, and I couldn’t wait to spend some quality time with my sister.

“Hey, Tricia!” I called as I came downstairs to see her at the table having coffee with Mom and Dad. She got up and gave me a hug.

“How’s my little sis? Looking adorable as usual, I see. Are you ready for our spa day?”

“I’m great, thanks, but what about you? Did you have a good drive down? When did you get here?” I replied as I stretched my arms up above my head.

“Yeah, it was good, and virtually no traffic, so I got here early and had a cup of coffee with Mom and Dad while waiting for your sleepy head to wake up,” she said, making us all laugh.

“We should get going soon, or we’ll be dealing with the Atlanta traffic.”

“Yeah, just give me a minute. I’ll be right back.”

I ran upstairs and grabbed my sandals then met Tricia outside. She owned the cutest car, a red Nissan Juke. I hadn’t seen it before; she bought it after her last visit home. Mom and Dad were outside checking it out.

“Wow! Your new car is amazing! I love it.”

She smiled. “Thanks, Sam. Now let’s get in and go so we aren’t late.”

Traffic was light. I told her about the hot air balloon ride Alec had taken me on.

“Damn, he sounds like a keeper.”

“I know. I’m in love with him. He asked me to get an apartment with him while we go to KSU. Hopefully, we’ll both get accepted. If Mom and Dad are okay with it, he wants to start looking right after graduation so we’re ready and moved in before classes start in the fall.”

“Wow. So you really think Mom and Dad will be cool with that?”

“Yes, I do. Tricia, they love Alec. He’s kind of an old soul, and I think they can relate to him. Plus, he’s responsible about everything; I think they’ll feel better knowing I’ll be living with him rather than on my own.”

“If you say so. Damn. That never would have flown with me. ‘No, Tricia, this; no, Tricia, that.’ It’s true, you know, what they say . . . that the babies of the family are spoiled with the lax rules.” Narrowing her eyes in my direction, she added, “You’re lucky I love you so much.”

As we picked out our nail polish, we giggled at some of the colors they had available. When they called us back to begin our pampering treatments, we looked at each other and sighed. Our facials were heavenly, the manicures, and pedicures were just what we needed to unwind.

After we finished, we grabbed a late lunch. Then spent the rest of the day walking around the mini-mall.

“Sam, check out that window display in Cindy’s Boutique.”

“Oh, wow! That’s really cute.”

She smiled. “Yeah, let’s go see if they have our sizes.”

We walked inside and went directly to the sales rack with the window display clothing.

“Awesome! Let’s go try these on.” I said.

We walked back and waved to Cindy. She was the sweetest lady and always had the latest, trendy clothes to choose from. As I slipped my dress on, I imagined how Alec’s face would look when he saw me in it, I suddenly felt flushed and excited.

“Tricia, I want to see your dress, so come out when you’ve got it on,” I whispered.

“Okay.”

I was standing at the tri-mirror, looking at the front, back, and sides of the dress. I loved it. Tricia came out of her changing stall, looking like a runway model. She was beautiful.

“Wow, you look great!”

“Thanks. I really like it,” she said, blushing.

She looked me up and down with a sly smile. “Yours looks fantastic, I bet that boyfriend of yours will love it!” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“Oh God, Tricia, stop. You’re embarrassing me.”

“I’m just saying how I see it. Besides, he’s a guy. Of course he’s going to love the way it hugs your curves.”

“Now you’re just making it worse,” I deadpanned.

“Okay, okay.” She raised her hands in surrender. “Geez.”

We changed back into our clothes and walked to the counter to make our purchases.

Putting our bags in the back of her car, she held her hand against her chest in mock disdain, “Good Lord, now I’m gonna have to find a guy to take me somewhere to wear this dress, you know that, right, Sam?”

I blushed. She was perceptive as always.

“Yes, yes, I know, you already have Alec,” she teased.

My phone beeped with a text message. I looked at the lock screen and saw it was from Alec.

A:

Sorry I took so long to reply. I can come to dinner.

Me:

Great! I’ll see you tomorrow.

A:

Ok.

I shook my head. Usually he ended our texts with Love you always.

Me:

I love you.

A:

You, too.

“Huh,” I muttered to myself.

“What’s that?” Tricia asked.

“Oh, nothing. Umm, Alec is coming to dinner tomorrow though.”

“Sweet.” She drew out the word.

“God, Tricia, please don’t embarrass me.”

“Stop, you know I won’t,” she admonished, “Let’s call Mom on the way home, and see if she needs anything from the store for tomorrow’s dinner. Aunt Olivia should be arriving soon,” she said.

“Okay, sounds good.”