Текст книги "Untamed"

Автор книги: S. C. Stephens

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Текущая страница: 12 (всего у книги 29 страниц)

Chapter 11

Awesome Does What Awesome Needs to Do

My phone began buzzing before I was ten feet from the stage. I was so ticked, I wanted to ignore it, but I couldn’t; when I glanced at the screen, I saw it was Anna. Fucking hell. Even though I was fuming, a knot of dread started growing in my stomach. I should not have just done that on live TV. I should have held it in until I could talk to her first, like I knew she wanted me to. Shit, now I was going to have to tell her I lied. She was going to kill me.

“Hello?”

“What the hell did you just do…on national TV?” Her voice was strained and rough, like a volcano churning with molten lava, waiting to explode. On me. How the hell was I going to explain myself without her flying off the deep end? And how far off the deep end would she go? Fuck. This was supposed to be my moment…I needed her beside me.

Wading past people who were holding their hands up trying to stop me, I tried to deflect the rampage I felt coming with confident nonchalance. This is no big deal. “Relax, everything is fine. I don’t need this gig. I’ve got a TV thing in the bag. They want to start filming on Monday, so as soon as I get back, we’re grabbing the girls and heading to L.A.” Walking to the greenroom, I stepped inside and closed the door. I wanted to be alone when my wife erupted.

“L.A.? Is this another commercial?” she asked, clearly confused. Then she got angry. “Did you just quit the band to sell alcohol on TV?”

Closing my eyes, I decided it was time to tell her everything. She was already mad anyway, how much worse could it get? Please don’t let it get any worse. I need my chill wife right now. “Well…I actually didn’t film a commercial while I was there. It was more like a pilot…for a weekly show…which is great for us. You wouldn’t believe how much money hot shows pay their actors. This will make what the D-Bags paid me look like minimum wage.” It was only then that I wondered just what my salary was…I couldn’t remember what I’d agreed to in the contract. It hadn’t seemed important at the time.

“I don’t care about the money, Griffin!” she snapped. “The band…they’re family. You can’t just quit them!”

Her voice was superheated now; the volcano was spewing ash. Well, I had my own storm brewing inside me too. My gaze snapped to the television screen showing the stage. The guys were storming off it, while Johnny was standing at his desk, clearly asking them to stay and talk.

I scowled at the screen and let that dark fury take me over. “Yeah, they’re family…family that’s been jerking me around, Anna. They don’t listen to me, they don’t take me seriously, they never give me a chance. All they do is hold me back. Sometimes you have to get out from under your family’s wings to really fly.” Damn that was good, almost poetic. And the guys say I can’t write lyrics. Impressed with myself, I added, “Honestly, babe, I’ve been thinking about quitting the band for a while.” Maybe just as a wish, or a fleeting thought that never went anywhere, but yeah, I’d been contemplating it. And now that it was done, I felt great about it.

Anna’s breath was shaky, like she was hyperventilating, and I swear I could hear her heart thudding, even over the phone. She was having a panic attack, and there was nothing I could do about it. Except possibly make it worse. “Griff, I don’t think this is a good idea. Talk to the guys, tell them you were joking. Then when you get home, we’ll sit down and…discuss your options.”

Joking? She wanted me to tell them I was joking? Fuck that. This was the most serious I’d ever been in my entire life. And “discuss my options”? In other words, “you’re incompetent, so let me map out your life for you.” No, thank you. I might have gone about it the wrong way, but I was right about this. I felt it in my bones. “I need this, Anna, and I need you on board with it. You’re my wife.”

She took a long time to answer me, and when she did, there was an unmistakable note of pain in her voice. Fuck, I’d hurt her. “You said you filmed a whiskey commercial. You lied to me.”

Seeing where this was going, I quickly interrupted. “I said it was sort of like a commercial, and it is sort of like a commercial. A really long, complicated commercial…and my character does order whiskey in the pilot…so that’s not really lying.” Even I knew I was full of shit, but what else could I say to her? Yeah, I totally lied to get my way. Sorry. She was already hurting. If I confessed what I’d really done, she’d change the locks at the house and call a lawyer. A brief wash of ice water filled my veins. God, I hoped she wasn’t so upset that she wouldn’t let me come home.

Her tone was frostier when she responded to my outlandish excuse. It actually relieved me to hear the anger. Fury was better than pain. “Fine. Then you skated around the truth so you could do what you wanted, regardless of the consequences. I don’t like that, and I don’t like what you’ve done. You should have told me the truth about this opportunity so we could have talked about it before you up and quit the band on live TV. Ugh! You fucking suck, Griffin, and I’m so fucking mad at you right now! Why the hell didn’t you just tell me about this earlier?” Everything she was saying was completely true, which was exactly why I didn’t want to hear it right now. I just wanted her on board, with me 110 percent, no matter what.

The residual ball of anger inside me wanted to tell her that it was my career, and I didn’t have to run anything by her, but I had enough sense to not say that at the moment. I quit the band on an impulse but I didn’t want to quit her. As calmly as I could, I answered her question. And admitting it took a lot of fucking willpower. “I thought you’d say no if I asked, so I didn’t. But it’s done now, and I need this. Are you with me?”

She let out a loud growl of frustration into the phone, then she barked, “We’ll talk about it when you get home!”

She disconnected and I stared at my phone. Anger and guilt were still taking turns battering my insides, but oddly, the thing I felt the most at the moment was relief. I wasn’t hiding anything from her anymore and she was allowing me to come home. That was something.

As the door to the greenroom burst open, my temporary relief vanished. “What the fuck was that, Griffin?” Matt’s face was so red, he looked sunburned.

Boxing up all the conflicting emotions I’d felt while talking to Anna, I puffed up my chest and focused on my indignation. “That was me standing up for myself. Taking charge of my life.” Vindication swept through me as I spoke. I had earned this shot at greatness; they couldn’t take it away from me this time.

Matt tossed his hands into the air. “Unbelievable.” He indicated Kellan standing beside Evan. Both men looked just as upset as Matt, although they hadn’t started in on me yet. “So, when you were pitching a fit about Kellan doing a side gig, that was just hypocritical bullshit. Right? The rest of us better put the ‘team’ before everything else, but you can just do whatever the fuck you want! Right?”

He had a point, but I didn’t want to admit it. They’d wronged me too many times; I owed them a little payback. “That’s just it. We were never a team! There was you guys and then there was me. You never gave me a chance, so I had to go make one on my own.” I pointed at myself with my thumb. “It’s my time now.”

“You’re an asshole!” Matt snapped.

“Fuck you!” I retaliated. “You put me in a box and I’m suffocating. You can’t blame me for wanting a little air.”

“Yeah…we can.” Matt’s eyes were cold pebbles of steel in his blazing face. I’d never seen him so pissed.

Even though his hand was shaking with rage, Evan placed it on Matt’s shoulder in an attempt to soothe him. Kellan shook his head. “Did you even think about what this would do to the band? The media circus you’ve just created. The album, the tour, the future…Did any of that enter your mind? Or were you too busy thinking about how awesome you were to care?”

I shot Kellan a glare. “It’s really easy to be super judgey when you’ve got the entire world eating out of the palm of your hand. You’ve never had to be in your shadow, so you have no idea how I feel.”

Kellan raised his hands. “Do you think that maybe you could have talked to me about it? Instead of being…well, you?”

“This is pointless.” Grabbing my jacket off the couch, I swung it over my shoulder and prepared to leave. “What’s done is done.”

Evan was blocking the door. Looking up at his stone face, I snipped, “Want to get out of my way?”

He shook his head. “You’ve been a part of this band since the beginning. You can’t just up and leave.”

My lips compressed. If they’d wanted me to stay so bad, they shouldn’t have treated me like I was an irritant. Something they all just put up with. “I never swore I’d stay.”

“You signed a contract,” Matt countered.

Glancing at him, I shook my head. “Not the same thing. We both know I can get out of that easily enough. I’m free to come or go as I please, that’s how I live my life.” I raised my chin, defying him to tell me what to do again.

Matt sniffed, then indicated the door. “Well then, by all means…go and be free.”

Looking away from me, Evan stepped aside so I could open the door, and without saying another word, I left the D-Bags behind.

The minute my plane landed in Seattle, I was bombarded by phone calls and voicemails. At least five of them were from Denny. Call me was the gist of his message. I didn’t plan to. I knew exactly what he’d say—You’re making a mistake, you should have run this by me, you need to publicly take back what you said, blah, blah, blah. I didn’t want to hear any of those things, so I didn’t need to see or speak to him.

Denny disagreed.

When I opened the front door of my house, he was standing there in the entryway, waiting for me. “Oh, fuck no. What the hell are you doing here?” I asked, tired and annoyed.

Denny indicated Anna beside him; Anna looked as ragged as I felt, worn to the bone, like she hadn’t slept a wink. “Your wife let me in. She seemed to think it might be a good idea if you and I talked.” Anna had her arms crossed over her chest, and her lips were compressed into firm, flat lines. Listen to him was being broadcasted from her so loudly it made my ears ache. That was about the last thing I wanted to do though.

I held up a hand. “No need. I know exactly what I’m doing, and I don’t need your advice or opinion.”

Denny took a step forward. “I know about the TV show. The guy approached me before he approached you. I said no. It wasn’t a good deal, it still isn’t.”

My jaw dropped open. “You said no? Why the fuck would you do that without consulting us first? We don’t pay you half our earnings so you can withhold information from us.”

Sighing, Denny shook his head. “For the umpteenth time, you don’t pay me fifty percent. But regardless, I did mention this. We had a group meeting about it. Don’t you remember that conversation?”

I tried to think back to what he was talking about, but I was jet-lagged, frustrated, and mentally depleted. And besides, his meetings were always so boring. I usually tuned him out after the first five minutes. “Can we do this later? I’m wasted.” I left the door open so he could exit, but he didn’t leave. Instead, he crossed his arms over his chest, in a mirror image of my agitated wife. Stubborn fucker.

“Fine,” I sneered. Slamming the door closed, I dropped my bags in the entryway and raised my hands. “Go ahead, I’m listening. Say what you have to say.”

Denny glanced at Anna, then back to me. “Anna told me he approached you at Pete’s. Don’t you think it’s weird that he met you in a bar instead of going through your agent?” I furrowed my brows but didn’t say anything to that. I guess it was kind of weird. Taking my silence as agreement, Denny continued. “He contacted me about Kellan doing it first, and I declined for him. Then he called back for Matt, and then for Evan, and then, eventually, for you. He asked for all the guys, and I declined for each of you. We had a group meeting once I realized he was just fishing for a name to sell the show. You pay me to keep your best interest in mind, and that is exactly what I did.”

His words tickled something dark inside of me. They asked for Kellan and the others first? I was last choice? No…that couldn’t be true. They wanted me and only me. He’d said so. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, man. We must be talking about different deals.”

Denny sighed, and a look of defeat came over him. “I know you’re not going to listen to a thing I say, but I’m begging you…for the sake of your family, if nothing else…this is not something you should get involved with, believe me. It’s a step down and a huge risk. There is no guarantee the show is going to go anywhere, and the pay is—”

Lifting my chin, I cut him off. “That’s one opinion. Mine is different. I think it’s a great opportunity, a chance for me to show my worth.” And that’s why everyone didn’t want me to do it.

Maybe seeing an angle he hadn’t tried, Denny latched onto my statement. “Look, I know Kellan’s fame can be overpowering, but you’re important too. The guys—”

I interrupted before he could finish whatever lame argument he’d cooked up. “No, I’m not important too, I’m important period. And I’m going to prove it. I’m doing this. You and the guys will just have to accept that and move on.”

Holding his hands up, Denny tried one more time to persuade me into seeing things his way. “Fine, do the show…but don’t quit the band. Take a sabbatical, see what happens…you don’t need to cut all ties and walk away.”

But that was just it. I did need to. I’d gone as far as I could with the D-Bags, and if I stayed with them, I knew exactly what would happen—I’d shrink further and further into the shadows. They’d clipped my wings, and I was dying to fly. “No. There is nothing left for me there. I want out of the band, permanently. Make it happen.”

Denny closed his eyes and I could almost see him cursing me in his mind. “Okay, I’ll have papers drawn up, dissolving your interest in the band.” With a forced smile, he held his hand out. “Good luck, Griffin. I think you’re making a mistake, but I honestly do hope this works out for you.”

With a genuine smile, I took his palm. “It’s me. Of course it’s going to work out.”

He left with a shake of his head, and the entryway echoed with silence after he was gone. Wondering if Anna would dig into me again, I looked back at her. She didn’t seem mad though. No, she looked terrified. “Griffin…he’s removing you from the band. Legally. This is real, do you understand that? You won’t be a D-Bag after this.”

Her words tickled something in the back of my brain, something chilly and painful. Not moving forward because of some lame sentiment about my past conflicted with my new dreams though. I had to close a door so I could open another one. Right? “I know that, Anna. I’m cool with…not being a D-Bag anymore.” Man, that was weird to say.

Anna inhaled a deep breath, then pressed her hands against her stomach, like she was feeling ill. “Don’t be hasty about this, Griffin. Take the sabbatical if you want to try this TV thing, but don’t quit the band.”

Wishing everyone would stop second-guessing my choices, and a little irritated that Anna had called my future career a “thing,” I shook my head. “No. This is the path I’m supposed to be on. I can feel it. The D-Bags were a stepping-stone, but I don’t need them anymore.” Saying that made me feel like I had a frog in my throat, and I had to swallow three times to remove it. It was true though. I’d given them their chance. They’d blown it.

Anna took a step toward me; her eyes were glistening. “You told me once that ever since you were little you wanted to be a rock star. You made it. You’re there. Why would you want to throw away your childhood dream?”

Running a hand down my face, exhaustion seeping through every pore, I let out a long sigh. “I said I wanted to be the star of a rock band, not band member number four that nobody knows or cares about.” I lifted my hands as I pointed out what should have been obvious to her. “All they care about is Kellan, but the guys won’t let me do anything to change that. They never let me do anything. They hold me back. All I wanted was one fucking song—one! And the fuckers wouldn’t even give me that. I can’t go anywhere with them. I’m stuck.” Despair started to creep in as I thought of the boxy cage they’d thrown around me. Truth be told, I’d stay with them…if I thought it would get me anywhere. But it never would, and Anna needed to accept that. If she felt so strongly about me remaining a D-Bag, then she should be having this conversation with them.

Anna put her hands on my chest, imploring me to listen. “Okay, you’re right, but quitting isn’t the answer. Talk to them. Please.” I could hear the utter desperation in her voice, and it freaked me the fuck out. I’d never heard anything like it from her before. Anna didn’t beg, not like this. But goddammit! This was my only chance to break free. If I didn’t take this opportunity, I’d never get another one. I firmly believed that.

“I have, Anna, several times. It doesn’t make a difference, and it never will. This is the only way.” Please accept that. Please stand by my side again. I’m not sure I can get through this without your support.

Her lips compressed in a familiar expression of frustration. “We’re supposed to be a team. Why are you suddenly making deals behind my back and deciding everything that happens to this family? Don’t I have a say? Don’t I have a vote? I mean, can’t we at least negotiate about this?” Even though she looked exasperated, her eyes were full of pleading, full of hope that I’d let her earn a chance to win the argument. I couldn’t afford to though. Not this time. I was going to have to be a chauvinistic jerk to help her past her unfounded fears, but she’d thank me before this was all said and done. We were going to come out of this even stronger. I knew it.

Knowing I was being a bossy asshole, I shook my head and firmly stated, “We’re leaving Seattle, Anna. This is happening. End of discussion.” She opened her mouth, but I turned away to go find my daughters. Hopefully they would be excited for me, since nobody else was.

Like Kellan had predicted, a shitstorm sprang to life after I very publicly dropped out of the band. I think every branch of the media called me; it was kind of awesome. I was finally getting a chance to speak, and I told them all the same thing: I’d hit a wall with the D-Bags, and I was branching out to try something new, something where I could be the star.

Some assholes asked me if my rash decision was due to jealousy. I told those guys to suck it. I wasn’t jealous, I was tired. Tired of being chained and restrained. It was time for the Hulk to be free.

“So we’re going to move to Daddy’s hometown. That cool with you?” I was explaining to Gibson that we’d be getting on a plane tomorrow and might not ever be coming back. I wasn’t sure how she’d take it.

She tilted her head of blond curls and gave me a look of complete and total trust. I stuck my thumb out in an A-okay gesture and with a big grin, she copied me. “Okay, Daddy.” At least someone had my back.

I patted her head, then gave her a kiss and stood up. Anna was holding Onnika while she watched Gibson and me. “We all packed and ready to go?” I asked her. A car was coming in the morning for us and some of our stuff. We’d send for the rest of our crap once we found a permanent place down south.

Anna nodded in answer, but she didn’t look happy about doing it. She wasn’t one to stress about things, so her reaction to my announcement was wiggin’ me out. Once she got over the fact that I’d sort of lied to her…and basically forced her to go along with my plan…I thought she’d be 100 percent on board. Especially after I explained how kick-ass our life was going to be when the show got huge. She didn’t seem moved by our upcoming awesomeness though. She seemed moody, pissy, and full of doubts, more like her sister than herself. Motherhood had sucked some of the carefreeness out of her.

I cupped her arms, just above her elbows. “We’re gonna be fine. Better than fine, even. You don’t need to worry about anything…except making sure we all get up on time to make the flight, because you know I’m unreliable as shit when it comes to stuff like that.”

“Shit.” Gibson giggled.

Anna sighed as she glanced at our little mockingbird. When her eyes returned to mine, they were a little lackluster, like she was just going through the motions. She’d looked like that ever since I’d told her we were leaving. “Don’t worry…I know my job. Just don’t be out late, otherwise nothing I do will wake you up.”

Hoping to see the smile I knew and loved, I crooked a grin and told her, “There’s always one thing you can do to wake me up…” I wriggled my eyebrows so she’d know exactly what I was talking about. She gave me a humoring smile as she shoved me toward the door, but that was about it. I’d kind of been hoping she would take me up on my suggestion. My bed had been so frosty last night it had made the Antarctic seem warm in comparison. It concerned me some. Anna usually attacked me when I came home from a trip, but she’d told me she wasn’t in the mood and had turned onto her side when I’d started nibbling on her. She hardly ever turned me down. And I’ll admit, the rejection hurt a little.

Thinking maybe a date night would cheer her up, I asked, “You sure you don’t want to go out with me? We could get a sitter for the girls?”

Anna looked around our home like she was memorizing it. “No…I want to be here tonight…”

I really didn’t understand the sadness that had been hovering around her since our argument. I’d expected the burst of anger, but the lingering melancholy…I just didn’t get it. I wanted her to be as excited about our new life as I was. It worried me that maybe she wouldn’t get over this…but we were L.A.-bound tomorrow, our new life awaited, and it was going to be epic. The Griffin Show: all Griff, all the time.

Hopping into my Hummer, I left my house for one last hurrah in Seattle. I really was going to miss it here, especially Pete’s, which is where I was headed. Even though I’d been raised in L.A., I felt like I’d grown up at the bar…come into my own, if you will. Since I didn’t know when I’d be back, I felt like it was the only place I should be tonight. As I pulled into the parking lot, I wished Anna had decided to come out with me. Since we’d met in this bar, it felt wrong to not say our goodbyes together. Pete’s was a milestone location for our relationship. She should be here.

Pushing aside that pensive thought, I shoved open the double doors to Pete’s like I was breaking them down. I wanted everyone to hear me coming. Since it was Saturday night, the place was packed. Numerous heads swiveled at my grand entrance; my skin sizzled as their eyes devoured me. Yeah…I loved being the center of attention.

A cheer went up in the bar when people recognized me. That was one of the best things about Pete’s—I was always recognized here. By the regulars, if nothing else. As expected, the fans started swarming around me, fondling me and asking questions. Their questions weren’t the kind I’d been expecting though, and their touches were more violent than usual. “How could you break up the band! How could you leave! Why are you doing this to us, when we’ve supported you for so long!”

The heat in their voices surprised me. I’d been expecting nothing but congratulations from the fans. “What the fuck are you going on about? I’m switching one awesomeness for another, that’s all.”

“You’re changing the band!” One red-faced girl shouted at me. “You’re ruining everything! How do you sleep at night, knowing you destroyed the D-Bags!”

I stared at her, dumbstruck. Ruining everything? I was making it better. For me, anyway. And I slept just fine, thank you very much. I was about to tell her that when a voice from the middle of the bar broke through the chatter.

“Yeah, Griffin! How do you sleep, knowing you fucked over the people who gave you the great life you resent so much?”

I looked over the various heads surrounding me until I found the owner of the voice. Matt. I should have known. He was standing near another clump of people, holding a beer and sneering at me like I was committing a sin just by being here. Rachel was with him, and by the way she was supporting him, I figured Matt was plastered. That would explain the outburst. Matt generally didn’t like to attract attention to himself.

Shoving some customers out of the way, I strode forward. “You got something to say to me, cuz?”

Matt tapped a finger against his jaw. “I’m not sure…but I think I just said it.” He turned to Rachel. “I was speaking out loud, right?”

Rachel sighed, then said something quietly and tugged on his arm. She looked like she didn’t want to be here anymore. I kind of agreed, but I was too mad to leave. “Screw you, Matt. I’m only doing this because you left me no other choice.”

Matt’s face turned an even deeper shade of red, and he started storming toward me; the fans between us quickly got out of the way, and Rita at the bar warned us to be good or she wouldn’t hesitate to call the cops on our asses. I glanced over to see her summoning the bar’s bouncer. I didn’t have time to worry about it though, because Matt had reached me, and he was pissed enough and blitzed enough that he wasn’t happy stopping with verbally assaulting me.

With both hands against my chest, he shoved me backward. I stumbled but caught myself. “Dude! Lighten the fuck up,” I snapped.

He let out a sardonic laugh. “Lighten up? You fucked the band three weeks before our album dropped. You’re the most selfish person I’ve ever met. I always knew you were a piece of work, but I had no idea what a fucking fucker you were until now. But you know what, it doesn’t fucking matter. We’ll replace your ass and move on. It will be easy as can be; I know a dozen guys who would love to have what you just threw away.”

He was in my face, shouting at me like I’d gone deaf or something. His words were tiny logs being set on my internal fire, stoking me piece by piece. If he didn’t shut his piehole soon, I was going to shut it for him. “Cool it, Matt. I’m just about done with you.”

His face turned incredulous. “Just about? I thought you were done. Well, I am too. We’re no longer family. You’re dead to me, asshole. And the D-Bags are better off without you!”

That did it. My body reacted before my mind could process what was happening. My entire arm tensed, my fingers curled into a rigid ball, and then I pulled back the coiled power and released it. My fist connected with Matt’s jaw and he spun to the ground. Rachel was instantly by his side.

Once she saw he was okay, she stared up at me with wide, horrified eyes. “Have you lost your mind!” she shouted.

Hovering over Matt, I shook my head. “No. I finally found it. And I’m finally seeing my ‘friend’s’ true colors. So much for blood being thicker than water.” I wanted to spit on Matt, but I thought better of it. He wasn’t worthy of my saliva.

The bar’s bouncer wrapped his fingers around my biceps and pulled me back. Turning my head, I spat out, “Let go of me, asswipe. I’m done pummeling him.”

The man, who could have been Sam’s twin, gruffed, “You’ll be done when you’re outside.” He manhandled me past the crowd that was booing me. Booing me. I almost couldn’t comprehend what I was hearing. Were they all drunk? Matt had started that shit; I’d only been defending myself. He was the bully here, not me.

As I was being dragged away, I shouted back at Matt, “Oh, by the way, I’m taking my name with me. You can’t use D-Bags! That was mine!”

I saw Matt scrambling to his feet. He followed us, spouting, “No, that’s not true. Your idea was Douchebags. I’m the one who suggested shortening it. It’s my name!”

I sneered at him; he had a trail of blood running out of the corner of his mouth from where my aching fist had connected with him. “We’ll let the lawyers settle this one.”

Matt put a hand on my shoulder. The bouncer told him to back off, but Matt ignored him. “You’re already quitting the band…don’t kill it too.”

With a sneer, I tossed out, “What do you need my name for anyway? Just call yourselves Kellan’s Bitches, ’cause that’s what you are.”

Matt stopped moving with us, and the crowd soon swallowed him up. But not before I heard him mutter, “Enjoy Hollywood, Griff.”

“I plan to,” I shot back, then Blockhead unceremoniously shoved me out the front doors. I landed on the cement in a painful pile.

“Don’t come back,” he ordered. “You’re officially banned from the premises.”

My hands were scraped and bleeding, and my elbow felt on fire, but ignoring my aches, I shot to my feet. “You couldn’t pay me to come back to this dump,” I sneered.

He only smiled, then walked back into the bar. I waited for the rush of outraged fans to come outside, gushing about how awful I was treated and how they’ll never frequent this place again…but no one came out. Not a single human being checked to see how I was doing. I didn’t want to admit it, but that stung.

Anna was surprised to see me when I got home, since I hadn’t been gone very long. I told her Pete’s was dead and she hadn’t missed much. I wasn’t entirely lying. Pete’s was dead to me now; I couldn’t go back if I wanted to. Not that I wanted to ever go back there. Pete’s could suck it. Matt was dead to me too now, but I didn’t mention that to her either. No point.

I fell asleep wishing I was away from here already, and ended up waking up an hour before the car taking us to the airport was scheduled to arrive. When Anna finally stirred, I had the mountain of bags we were traveling with stacked by the front door, a pot of coffee brewing, and a vodka Red Bull in my hand. Might as well start the day out right.

“You beat me. I don’t think you’ve woken up before me…well, ever.” She yawned and stretched after she said it, and I did the same. I might have woken up before her, but it was still freaking early.