Текст книги "Sweet Addiction"

Автор книги: Maya Banks

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Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 20 страниц)

CHAPTER 12

Ren trembled in anticipation, her gaze focused solely on Lucas. She stared into his dark eyes as he rose over her and tucked his cock between her ass cheeks.

She was feeling vulnerable tonight. A little off kilter. It was a sensation she didn’t like. As much as she loved all of Lucas’s dark edges and embraced his willingness to push her as hard and as fast past that gray line of her limits, she was suddenly very unsure of herself.

Never had she felt so unsteady and so out of sorts. Instead of his ruthless dominance and possession, she wanted—no, she needed—his tenderness, a side, that while rarely shown or given, was as powerful, if not more so than his harder side.

Lucas froze, staring back at her, his eyes searching to her very depths. Slowly he unfolded her legs and pulled her gently toward him so her legs rested on either side of his hips. Then he simply reached forward, slid his hands underneath her shoulders and pulled her upward so she sat in his lap facing him.

Bewildered, she could only look on helplessly and wait for what was next. Had he seen what she’d tried so hard to keep from him? Had he plucked the thoughts right out of her head?

His palms glided up and down her back and she realized then he was indeed soothing her. Unexpected tears pricked her eyelids and then he enfolded her in his arms and held her close.

He didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. He saw into her very heart. Every time. He always knew when he could push and when he couldn’t. He’d seen it now and instead of punishing her for being out of sorts, he offered her the strength and comfort she so desperately craved.

“Why are you so upset, my Ren?” he asked several long minutes later.

She clung to him, her face buried in his neck. He pried her away from him and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumb.

She hated that she was so weak in front of him. That she’d cried all over him. She never cried. She was always so careful to only show him her strength and quiet determination. He’d seen her not at her best, but he’d never seen her so …distraught.

“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I do and I don’t. I’m so confused. I don’t know what I want.”

“That isn’t like you. You’re the most confident, self-assured woman I’ve ever known. You’re comfortable in your skin. You always know precisely what you want and you’ve never been bashful about pursuing it. I’ve always admired that about you.”

She laid her head back on his shoulder and wrapped her hand around the side of his neck, clutching at him, needing that contact. “You asked me what was different in our relationship or rather how our relationship differed from the others I’ve had. This, Lucas. This is what’s different.”

He stroked his hand through her hair. He pressed his lips to her forehead in the most gentle of kisses and then said, “Explain.”

“You get me. Really get me. It’s not all about you as a lot of people would assume a relationship where dominance is a factor would be about your needs and wants above all else.”

“Your happiness is important to me,” he said by way of agreement.

She sighed. “In all my other relationships, except one, it’s been more about the man. Not always or all the time but mostly. In all but one, my partner never had my complete trust. In all but one, I was never …home. You’re home to me, Lucas. I feel safe and cherished with you. I trust you.”

He seemed pleased by her heartfelt declaration. He squeezed her warmly and she could feel the pleasure seeping through him. That made her happy. She wanted him to know how much he meant to her. How much his protection meant to her.

“You said except one. Do you mean Cole?”

She took in a deep breath. “Yes. I was happy with Cole. My relationship with him mimicked a lot of the things I value most about my relationship with you. Only ours is a more grown-up version of what I had with him. I like to think if only Cole and I had had time that we could have grown into something like what you and I have now.”

“And yet the idea of me giving you to him distresses you,” Lucas murmured.

“I’m scared,” she admitted. “And confused. Maybe a little threatened, you know?”

He brushed his mouth over her temple, a simple gesture she felt all the way to her soul.

“Why, Lucas? Why are you doing it? I don’t understand. I’m afraid to dig too deeply for the answer.”

Before she hadn’t been willing to ask, but now she had to know. Was it a test? She wasn’t sure she could do this. He hadn’t done it to hurt her. She’d never believe Lucas would be that cruel. Which meant he had a specific reason for sending her back into the arms of the man who’d broken her heart.

He pulled her back just enough that he could touch her jaw, cup her chin, rub his thumb gently across her lips. So comforting. So very real.

“You say you trust me.”

She nodded without hesitation.

“Then trust me that this is what I feel is best for you. I think this is something you need. I would not do it if I thought it would hurt you. It may make you uncomfortable, but I think when all is said and done, this is for the best.”

The calm in his voice soothed her frayed nerves. She did trust him. Implicitly. He’d never steered her wrong. He’d never done anything without her best interests at heart.

And the truth was that she did want to see Cole again. She’d imagined what it would be like to have him touch her as he’d once done. Wondered if he’d even want to. She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him since the night she and Lucas had gone to The House.

What had rattled her far more than her encounter with her first love was the guilt she’d felt for thinking of him ever since. Lucas was everything to her and yet she couldn’t stop thinking about a man who shouldn’t occupy her thoughts or her fantasies.

The fact that Lucas seemed to understand only made the guilt burn more brightly. That he’d gone as far as to make an arrangement with Cole because he thought it was something she needed made her want to curl into a ball of shame.

“Ren.”

Lucas’s soft admonishment had her looking up and tears gathered once more when she saw the understanding reflected in his eyes.

“Do you think I would be angry for you being human enough to feel emotion when confronted with someone you used to love? Do you think I would punish you for being honest enough with yourself and me to admit these feelings?”

He smoothed his hand down her cheek, wiping at the trail of moisture leaking down the side of her face.

“I’m angry at myself,” she choked out. “You don’t deserve this. I feel so disloyal.”

He smiled then. “Do you get angry when I glance fondly at a former lover when she comes my way?”

She frowned and shook her head.

“Why is that?”

“Because I know you feel nothing more than a passing affection for her now.”

Lucas nodded. “Exactly. Now, perhaps I do this so that it can be determined what exactly you feel for Cole Madison. I think it’s important, don’t you?”

Slowly she nodded, marveling at how logical and in control he was. She was a blubbering mess and he was a rock. Always her rock. She sighed and went into his arms again, rubbing her cheek against his chest.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “For understanding me.” For knowing when to be gentle and when to be hard and forceful. She left the last unspoken but he knew. He always knew.

Lucas reached up to lower the divider so he could speak to the driver. “You may take us to our destination now.”

Judging by the length of time they’d been riding, Ren assumed that Lucas had given the direction to just drive.

After the divider slid back up, Lucas leaned down to retrieve her clothing that was strewn on the floor.

“Get dressed and straighten your appearance. I’m sure you’ll want to look your best when you face your past.”

He touched her cheek then ran a finger over her still quivering lips.

“Show no fear, Ren. Show him the woman I know so well. The woman you’ve become. You have nothing to be ashamed of. If you do nothing else, show him just how big of a mistake he made by walking away from you.”

She smiled then and felt the warm brush of her confidence as it slid neatly back into place. Maybe Lucas was right. Maybe she did need to face Cole before she could move ahead to her future. A future she hoped with everything she had would include Lucas.

PART 2
cole

CHAPTER 13

By the time they slowed to turn into Cole’s driveway, Ren had regained her composure—mostly—and repaired her makeup and straightened her clothing. If it weren’t for her rapid pulse, she could fool herself into thinking this was just another exciting sexual venture for her and Lucas.

But it wasn’t and no amount of telling herself would change the fact that for tonight, she was Cole Madison’s.

Edgy excitement cut through the guilt and worry. Her body hummed with sharp arousal—and curiosity. Would she even respond to his commands now? Did he possess the knowledge to give her what she needed?

They slowed at the gate and her eyebrows rose when the driver had to stop and press the intercom button. She glanced out the window into the darkness but couldn’t see the house from where they were parked.

A moment later, the gate slowly swung open and the limousine proceeded onto the grounds. The driveway was long and winding and only after several seconds did the house come into view.

It was beautiful. Light was cast onto the house from an array of ground lighting. The front was composed of stone instead of brick. Rustic and rugged looking. Exactly how she imagined Cole would have his house.

From what she could see of the grounds, they were exquisitely rendered and professionally maintained. Nothing seemed out of place.

The driver pulled to a stop in front of the circle drive of the house and before Lucas could open the door, Cole appeared at the top of the steps just outside the front entryway.

Ren scooted to the edge of the seat as Lucas got out in front of her. For a moment her view of Cole was blocked but then Lucas shifted to the side and extended his hand to help her out.

Cole was focused solely on her, his gaze locked. As her hand slid into Lucas’s she prayed she wouldn’t betray her nervousness by shaking.

No matter what Lucas had arranged, she was here as Lucas’s possession and she would not bring shame to him by acting anything but calm and measured. Everything she did reflected on Lucas. She represented him in all things.

She stood gracefully as Lucas pulled her the remaining way out. The door closed behind her and she dimly heard Lucas give his driver instructions.

She ate Cole up with her gaze. He leaned against one of the columns decorating his front porch, hands in the pockets of his slacks. The pose was deceptively relaxed because she could see the tension in his eyes. She could feel it.

Dear God, this was real. She was walking up the sidewalk to Cole Madison’s front door. She was here to belong to him for the evening. Maybe even the night. She had no idea of Lucas’s plans. Only that she was to give herself unreservedly.

Butterflies scuttled around her stomach, but this time they weren’t because of nerves. Excitement danced its way through her veins. Desire. Lust. All there at the idea of this man possessing her even for a short period of time.

Lucas assisted her up the steps and they stopped in front of Cole.

Cole tore his gaze from Ren as if loath to even acknowledge Lucas, but he stuck to protocol and addressed the man who owned her first.

“Lucas, I’m glad you and Ren could make it.”

Lucas extended his hand and Cole shook it as the two men exchanged polite greetings.

Then Cole reached for her hand and Lucas released it. An electric charge singed over her skin as soon as Cole curled his fingers around hers. He pulled it up in a formal gesture and pressed a kiss to her knuckles.

“Ren, you look beautiful.”

She blushed. Actually blushed, her face warm with pleasure. Cole slowly lowered her hand and then motioned toward the door.

“Please come in.”

As soon as Ren stepped inside she noted the innate comfort that oozed from every corner. There was nothing cold or sterile about this house. It was warm and inviting. Decorated and furnished for comfort.

The couches and chairs were sumptuous, plush leather. The artwork wasn’t modern, inexplicable renderings of God only knew what. Instead there was a rustic theme both in décor and color scheme that she loved.

It looked—and felt—like Cole. The Cole she remembered. The Cole he always wanted to be.

Sadness and regret welled inside her. Perhaps this would have been their home. Or maybe she needed to accept that they weren’t meant to be.

For a moment she lost herself and nearly went to sit when Cole made a motion for Lucas to get comfortable. After a half step, she froze and went instead to the middle of the living room to await instruction.

Lucas had already told her. Tonight she was Cole’s to command.

She glanced Lucas’s way, just insecure enough to want his reassurance. He gave it with a slight nod. Approval flashed in his eyes, eyes that were usually closely guarded in front of others, but he knew how on edge she was.

Carefully she turned in Cole’s direction and raised her gaze until she met his. The intensity in his expression sent shivers down her back. It was a delicious sensation of knowing she was hunted. There was no mistaking the naked desire in those brilliant blue eyes.

She caught her breath, suddenly nervous, giddy, excited to hear what his first command would be.

Cole stared at Ren, his chest so tight it threatened to split open. She was here. In his living room, his home, where she belonged. Where she’d always belonged.

She was here but she belonged to another man, and Cole was expected to perform in front of him so he could be judged. Deemed worthy of Ren. Hell, this sucked. He didn’t want to share Ren with anyone. He wanted her where no one else could see her, where he could lavish her with attention. Spoil her endlessly.

Lucas’s words flashed in his mind. She needed strength. She liked the hard edges. She craved them, needed them. Whatever happened between them for the rest of their time together, tonight he had to convince Lucas Holt that he could leave knowing Ren would be taken care of.

“Come to me,” he said, not making a move toward her. It took a lot of discipline not to charge over, throw her over his shoulder and carry her off to his bedroom. Fuck Lucas Holt and his damn expectations.

But he forced himself to maintain the tight discipline he held in all other areas of his life. Apparently when it came to Ren, everything he knew deserted him. She stripped him bare.

Ren walked on soft feet the few steps to where he stood. She was so close he could smell her. Sweet, a little exotic and infinitely mysterious.

Their gazes caught and held. He could drown in those oddly colored green eyes of hers.

“Kiss me.”

Her eyes widened. She was surprised by his command. But with little hesitation, she closed the remaining distance between them, pressed her body against his and leaned up to press her lips to his.

He inhaled deeply, overcome at the assault on his senses. Touch, smell, taste …Dear God, her taste.

He cupped her face in his hands and then slid his fingers back until they tangled in her hair. He held her captive, or maybe she held him in her thrall. Either way he wasn’t about to hurry this moment.

He fed on her lips. Absorbed her sweetness. Their tongues brushed, flirted, retreated and then boldly advanced again.

For too long he’d merely dreamed of holding her again. Of being able to kiss her and know that she was his.

His lungs screaming for air, he dragged his mouth away and slowly released her. She stumbled a bit and he caught her arms, glancing down at the wickedly high heels she wore.

He frowned. “Take off your shoes before you hurt yourself.”

There was faint amusement on her face as she slid the fuck-me shoes off and let them fall to the floor. As if he needed her wearing those shoes for him to want to fuck her …It was all he’d thought about for the last several days.

“You sound like Lucas,” she murmured.

He scowled, not at all flattered by the comparison. She frowned a little in return, worry flashing in her eyes. Worry that she’d displeased him. He purposely steeled his features, angry that he’d allowed her to see his reaction.

“Take off your clothes. Piece by piece. Don’t rush. You may lay them on the desk by the window.”

Color rushed to her cheeks and she glanced downward. He found her shyness both endearing and heartbreaking. It hurt that the woman who used to undress so boldly before him was now self-conscious, as if he were a complete stranger.

He moved to her and her head yanked up, fear now crowding behind the nervousness. She licked her lips, poised to voice an apology for her hesitation. He could read her as surely as if she’d already said the words aloud.

He simply shook his head and then pulled her into his arms. He lowered her head so he could whisper in her ear. “Don’t be afraid of me, Ren. It would kill me. I’ll never hurt you. I would rather be alone with you so that we could rediscover each other in private, but this is Lucas’s requirement and the only way I could have you.”

She relaxed into his arms and rubbed her cheek along his shoulder, a motion so achingly familiar that it damn near gutted him.

Instead of having her carry out his command, he began to undress her himself. The last thing he wanted was for her to be on edge around him. Anything he could do to assuage her fears and uncertainty, he’d do.

He held his breath as he untied her top and let it fall away. She went to pull at her skirt, but he put his hand on hers. “No. Let me. I’ve decided I’d like to do it myself.”

Her fingers shook as she let her hand fall to her side.

His knuckles graced the softness of her belly as he lowered his hand to catch at the waistband of the frilly skirt. Unsure of who he was teasing more, her or himself, he inched the material down until finally it billowed to the floor at her feet.

There she was, adorned only in lacy black lingerie, looking so sensual and utterly beautiful that he couldn’t breathe. He didn’t want to breathe. He just wanted to stare and drink her in until he was high on nothing but her.

She lifted her chin, and for the first time since he’d commanded her, she returned his gaze head on. She was as aroused as he was. Satisfaction was a savage thrill that coursed through his veins like a potent drug. She wanted him. There was no disguising the truth in eyes that never lied.

“Take off the panties. Just your panties,” Cole whispered, barely about to speak around the knot in his throat.

Her thumbs tracked down until they caught in the thin string of the delicate lace. She did a little shimmy with her hips to ease the scrap of material down her legs and he nearly swallowed his tongue.

Soft, creamy skin. Smooth legs. Hips with just enough curve to be damn sexy and an enticing place for his hands to rest.

At the V of those perfect legs was a tiny triangle of trimmed, dark hair and it fired his imagination. Did she keep her lips smooth and bare as she had when they were together?

He’d never forget the first time she’d shyly presented her newly waxed flesh. He’d spent hours touching, licking and coaxing her to orgasm after orgasm.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Lucas move. Just shifting one leg over the other, but it brought reality crashing back. Total buzzkill.

He was expected to perform. To another man’s standards. It made him want to bare his teeth and snarl like a predator issuing a challenge. If only it were that simple …

He turned away from Ren, leaving her standing in only her bra. He pulled a condom from his pocket, resentful of the need to use one. Lucas probably had her bareback on a daily basis. If Ren were Cole’s he sure as hell wouldn’t have anything between his dick and the pure sweetness of her flesh.

He lowered himself onto the armless leather chair and let his legs sprawl apart. Then he held the condom out to her and motioned her over.

She came without hesitation and stood before him, waiting his next instruction.

“Unzip me, suck me hard and then put the condom on.”

Her eyes narrowed to half slits and they burned with sudden fire. He smiled secretly to himself. She still loved it when he talked crudely and explicitly to her.

She went gracefully to her knees, her hair falling forward over one shoulder. Her hands smoothed up his legs, a subtle tease, before she unbuttoned his fly and slowly lowered the zipper.

She pulled at his underwear, slipping the band over his rigid arousal until finally he was free. His dick popped out and into the warm clasp of her hand. As soon as she gripped him, he damn near passed out.

He’d told her to get him hard, but from the moment he’d stepped out of his front door to see her getting out of the limo, he’d been nothing more than a walking, talking erection.

She lowered her head and gently tucked him into her mouth. He moaned, not keeping his pleasure from her. She made a sound of appreciation around the head of his dick and then sucked him deeper.

“That’s it,” he murmured. “Good girl. That feels so good. Deeper. Now hold it. Yeah, just like that.”

He felt her quiver around him, her soft sounds of pleasure spilling from her throat. She’d always loved when he was vocal during sex. Loved when he told her exactly what pleased him.

He pushed his fingers into her hair, pulling the strands back so he could see her cheeks puff out and then suck in around his cock. Her eyes were half closed, satisfaction glowing brightly in their depths.

He could hardly believe that she was here, between his knees, her mouth around him. It was a scene from his deepest held dreams, the ones he wouldn’t admit to himself in the light of day but would look forward to each and every night.

It should irritate him or somehow make him feel much younger and less mature than his thirty-plus years that for all practical purposes he’d pined for this woman for ten years. But all he could think was that finally, finally she was here, with him, where she belonged.

He tightened his hold in her hair and then gently pulled through the strands so they spilled over his hand like a midnight sky.

“You decide when it’s enough,” he said in a low voice. “After you put the condom on, I want you to straddle me and take me inside you. If you aren’t ready, tell me so that I can better prepare you.”

He could hardly wait to have her in his arms. All of her. Her astride him, his dick embedded deeply in her body, his arms full of lush, beautiful woman.

She worked him in and out of her mouth several more seconds and then carefully eased her lips over the crown and then away, leaving his cock slick and shiny with her saliva.

She opened the condom and deftly rolled it down his rigid length and he stared at it, hating every inch of the latex as it sheathed him. Then she rose, standing before him in just that wicked sexy bra that barely covered the tops of her nipples.

He held out his hands to take hers and helped her position herself astride him. She settled onto her knees on either side of his hips and then reached down for his dick.

He shook his head and pushed her arm back up. “Put your hands on my shoulders and hold on.”

He reached down to position his cock at her opening, rubbing up and down her slit to tease her. She let out a small sigh and briefly closed her eyes.

“Open your eyes,” he said in the same measured tone he’d used with her thus far. “I want to see you when I slide into you, Ren. I want you to see me and know who it is inside you.”

“I would know,” she whispered.

He smiled.

He eased his hips up the tiniest bit so that the head of his cock was lodged just inside her. Then he met her gaze and issued his next command.

“Take me.”

Her eyes widened, the pupils flaring. A shudder rolled through her and her fingers bit into his shoulders.

“That’s right, Ren. I want you to fuck me. There’ll be plenty of time for me to do the fucking. For now I want you to ride me.”

She let out a small whimper as she began her downward slide. She opened around him and he let out a strangled moan as she fisted him in her hot, velvet glove.

He moved his hands to those delectable hips and reached around to cup her ass. Just the right amount of softness to the cheeks. Right shape. Firm and yet plush. Yeah, he was an ass man. He’d admit that. But her legs were a very close second. Especially in those sexy-as-hell shoes. He was determined to fuck her in those shoes at a later date. Just her shoes on and a smile.

He lifted, helping her to push upward until his dick was nearly free and then he lowered her back down until he was once again surrounded by hot, liquid silk.

That black lace bra was tantalizing him. Staring him in the face, the tops of her breasts plumped up over the demi cups almost baring her nipples. Almost. And that was what was killing him.

He put his arms around her and slid his hands up her back to the clasp of her bra. In a single motion he popped the hooks and the bra came free. He reached up, pulled her hands down from his shoulders long enough to free her of the bra, and then he stared greedily at the plump swells and her dark nipples that were so rigid that they’d puckered into tight little beads.

“Offer me your breasts,” he said. “Cup them and guide them toward my mouth. I want to taste them.”

She shuddered again and clamped down on his cock, sending a spasm of delight though his groin. Then she dropped her hands from his shoulders and cupped her full breasts in her palms. She stroked her nipples with the ends of her thumb and then leaned forward, offering him one, holding it teasingly close to his lips.

Instead of taking it in his mouth, he flicked out his tongue and licked the bud.

“The other now,” he said huskily.

She moved so the other was there for him to take. This time he grazed the point with his teeth and nipped playfully until she made another sound that bordered on desperation.

“Ask me to suck them.”

She swallowed but then said in a voice that was barely above a whisper, “Suck my nipples, Cole. Please.”

“Louder. I can’t hear you,” Lucas said.

Ren’s head snapped up and she turned in Lucas’s direction, her eyes wide and guilty. Cole cursed the other man’s intrusion but perhaps it had been intentional. A reminder of his presence.

He shot a withering stare in the other man’s direction. He hadn’t appreciated the interruption. As long as he could hear Ren, he didn’t give a damn if Lucas could or not. She wasn’t fucking Lucas. She was fucking Cole.

Then Lucas rose and walked toward the chair where Cole sat with Ren astride him.

“Tell me, Madison. Do you prefer her pussy or her ass for the next little while?”