Текст книги "A fire in the flash"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 26 (всего у книги 37 страниц)

“Is it your breathing?” Ash’s voice dropped to a whisper, and he stepped into me.

Gods, the fact that he’d even thought of that and made sure only I could hear him… I inhaled through my nose as the nausea receded. “No, I…I was just dizzy.” I opened my eyes to see his concerned stare latched on to me. “I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.” Attes’s voice was closer.

Ash’s head snapped to him. “Do you want to get punched again?”

“Not particularly,” the Primal responded, his skin blanching. “You saw what I did.”

“What did you see?” I demanded, glancing between them. Neither answered. “What?”

“You appeared as if you were shifting,” Elias answered as the distant, angry roar of a draken sounded.

“Shifting?” I said while Nektas pulled his head from the breezeway, scanning the sky. “Into what? Someone wearing more clothing?”

A dimple appeared as Attes cracked a grin. It was probably a good thing Ash hadn’t seen that.

“We could see the embers.” Ash tucked a strand of my hair back. “In your flesh. But only for a few seconds.”

“Oh,” I whispered, thinking of the tiny dots of silvery light I’d seen in my skin.

“You… You looked beautiful,” Ash said, a flicker of awe crossing his features before concern settled in his gaze. “We need to leave.”

Wordlessly, I nodded as I glanced over at Attes. The concern was evident on his face, too, but I knew it wasn’t reserved only for me. I swallowed, searching for Sotoria’s presence. I… I felt her where the embers had been, quiet but aware.

“But we also need time,” Ash went on. “As much time as possible with Kolis out of commission.”

Elias jerked his chin at Kolis. “I can get him out of here. Hide him and make his recovery a bit more…taxing.” A brutal smile appeared, and I had a feeling a taxing recovery involved growing back limbs. “His loyalists will be concerned only with finding him. That will give you some time.”

“Not a lot,” Attes warned.

My heart turned over heavily as I thought about everything I wanted to do in this not-a-lot-of time. All I wanted to experience. A knot lodged in my throat. This was yet another thing I couldn’t think about.

“Is that what you want done?” Elias asked.

Silence greeted him as I waited for Ash or Attes to answer, but they were looking at me. So was Elias.

My brows flew up. “You’re asking me?” I squeaked hoarsely.

A faint smile tugged at Ash’s lips. “You are the Primal of Life he swore his allegiance to,” he reminded me. As if I’d forgotten.

“I’m your Consort,” I reminded him.

“Actually,” Attes began, then stopped himself. “Never mind.”

I sort of wanted to know what he’d been about to say, but we needed to leave. “I have no idea what we should do with him.”

“You know my answer,” Ash said. “But you were right to stop me—as much as I wish you were not.”

“You and me both.” I ran a hand over my arm, ignoring the stickiness of the blood there. “Could we take him with us until we can figure out what to do with him?”

“That would be ideal.” Attes had moved closer to Kolis and knelt. He cursed. “But I’m not sure that would be wise.”

Ash’s attention shifted to the other Primal. “What is happening.”

“The bone shard didn’t go nearly deep enough to stay in on its own. You can’t even get it that deep,” he explained, rising. “His body will start pushing it out soon.” He turned to us. “He’ll awaken.”

“And there’s nothing else we can do to keep him down?” I asked.

“Not unless we get our hands on a bone blade,” Attes said.

I tried to keep the frustration down. “You can’t take your brother’s?”

Attes shot me a bland look. “I don’t think he’ll give his up without a major fight.”

“One you perhaps don’t want to start,” Ash bit out.

Attes’s stare flicked to Ash. “You would be correct. I want to avoid that for as long as possible.” His jaw flexed. “Because I know it will end with either my death or his.”

My stomach twisted. No part of me would mourn Kyn’s death, but his passing, without another to rise to take his place, would cause more upheaval. I looked at Kolis.

And Attes shouldn’t be the one to kill his brother if it came down to that.

“So, that leaves us with what again?” I asked.

Ash kept his arm around me as he turned to Elias. “You really think you can get him out of here?”

Elias nodded.

“That will give us some time,” Ash said. “Do it.”

“But can you do it safely?” I tacked on. “Like without getting killed?”

“My safety is of no concern to you, Your—”

“Don’t call me that,” I cut in. “And your safety is a concern, or I wouldn’t have asked that.”

Elias glanced at Ash, then swallowed upon seeing whatever look Ash sent him. “I am honored that you would be concerned for me. I can do this safely.” He looked at Attes, a gleam lighting up his amber eyes. “If you lend me something big enough to haul his ass out of here with and fast. Like perhaps Setti?”

“I think you just want to ride my horse,” Attes remarked, dragging his fingers over the cuff encircling his biceps. “But yes.”

A thin stream of mist drifted from Attes’s cuff, rapidly spreading and taking shape, solidifying into a massive horse the size of Odin with a glossy, shadowstone-hued coat. Setti shook out his mane, making a soft, low-pitched nicker.

“I will never get used to seeing that,” I murmured, my gaze moving to the cuff on Kolis’s arm.

I thought of the weird milky reflection I’d seen there. I hadn’t seen his steed—

Wait.

Milky-white light.

Eythos.

“Wait!” I shouted as Attes took hold of Setti’s reins. The warhorse stomped hooves twice the size of my hand. My heart pounded. “My gods.” I twisted toward Ash, my eyes wide. Gods, his father… “I almost forgot.”

“Forgot what?”

“The diamond.” I slipped free of Ash’s hold. Or tried to. He moved with me, his arm at my waist. “The Star diamond.”

Attes stepped around Setti as Ash straightened, asking, “You found it?”

“Yeah. Yes. Do you know what it is?”

Elias shook his head, but Attes nodded. “Eythos told me about it.”

Ash stared at him, a whole lot of stuff likely beginning to click into place.

“You’re not going to believe this.” I twisted around. This time, Ash let me go. Even though my legs felt as if only thin tendons held them together—barely—they were thankfully steady. “It’s here. It’s been here the whole time.”

I shuffled toward the ruined cage. “I don’t think I destroyed it. Hopefully.” I peered inside, relieved to see the cluster of diamonds still at the center of the cage. “There it is. In the ceiling. Kolis had it hidden there.”

Ash joined me, a muscle in this temple throbbing as he surveyed what was left of the enclosure and what remained inside it.

“Up there,” I repeated softly, not wanting him to think about anything else he saw. “I don’t have much time to explain all of this, but we need that diamond.”

His shoulders squared as he lifted his gaze. “You sure that’s it?”

“He summoned it. And when he did, it changed shape, becoming a diamond that looked like, well…a star.”

“How did he summon it?” Attes asked, coming to our side.

“He spoke in Primal, I think.” I wiped my damp palms on my gown. “Do you think The Star could hold Sotoria’s soul?”

Attes rubbed his jaw as he eyed the cluster of diamonds. “I don’t see why not when it can hold embers.”

“I feel as if I’m missing vital information,” Ash remarked.

“You are.” Quickly as possible, I filled him in on the part about Sotoria’s soul. “Kolis said something like…like vene ta meyaah but not.”

Ash repeated what I said back, his brows furrowing. “Do you mean vena ta mayah? It translates into come to me.”

“Yes!” The translation made sense. “Do you think it will work if someone else says it?”

“It’s like some kind of ward,” Ash said, his gaze dropping to the bed. His chest rose. “If so, neither Attes nor I will be able to summon it.” He met my gaze. “But you could.”

“Because of the embers,” I surmised.

He nodded. “But I don’t want you to do that.”

Attes stiffened. “We need to get Sotoria’s soul out of Sera before anything else happens.”

“You may need that,” Ash corrected, eyes flashing a vivid silver. “But what I need, what Seraphena needs, is to not use those embers.”

My stomach twisted at what Ash wasn’t saying. That using the embers would push me over the edge, completing my Ascension.

“You don’t understand,” Attes argued. “We may not be able to kill Kolis yet, but one day, we might, and only Sotoria will be able to do it.”

“I don’t give two shits about one day,” growled Ash. “I care about right now, and what using those embers will do.”

“It’s not just that.” Eather laced Attes’s eyes. “Sotoria’s soul will be trapped here when—”

“Don’t”—a storm of fury blew off Ash—“even think of finishing that sentence.”

Attes stepped back, thrusting a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry—”

“Don’t finish that sentence either.” Shadows bled beneath Ash’s flesh.

Neither sentence needed to be finished. We all knew what wasn’t being said. Sotoria’s soul would be trapped here if I Ascended, which wouldn’t happen. Or if I died, which was happening. That was the strangeness I felt in my body, the hollowness in my chest. Because the embers were no longer there.

They were everywhere now, becoming a soft hum in my blood and a faint vibration in my bones.

Whatever the ceeren had sacrificed for me had either run its course, or what I’d done to put Kolis out of commission and free Ash had used it all up. Attes knew I was dying. That was what he was apologizing for. And Ash…

Ash knew, too.

But Sotoria wasn’t the only reason I needed that diamond. Taking a deep breath, I stepped into the cage.

“Sera,” Ash snapped, suddenly beside me. “I don’t want you in this cage ever again.” Eather streaked his cheeks as he clasped mine. “Not for one second.”

Gods, I loved him.

“You need to conserve your energy,” he said, tension gathering in his body. “And we need to leave. Now.”

Sensing that he was about to pick me up and shadowstep to the gods only knew where, I wished there was another way to share what I’d discovered with him. “It’s not just about Sotoria.” I spoke past the emotion clogging my throat. “It’s about your father. His soul is in The Star.”

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Ash stared down at me, his lips parting. “What?” he rasped.

“Are you sure?” Attes demanded, his voice nearly as rough as Ash’s.

I nodded. “I’m positive. When I touched it earlier, I…I knew his soul was in there.”

Ash’s entire body jerked. He stepped back, almost as if out of reflex.

I didn’t take my eyes off Ash’s. His were so bright I could barely see his pupils. “I need to get The Star for him, too.”

His throat worked on a swallow as his gaze flickered to the ceiling. “My father…” He shook his head as his gaze returned to mine. Tension bracketed his mouth, and his voice lowered as he said, “I don’t want you using the embers.”

“Ash—”

“Not for him. Not even for me. I will not have you risking your health and—” His voice…gods, it cracked. And so did my heart. Eather whipped through his irises. “I will not risk you.”

Shock rippled through me. “It’s your father’s soul, Ash.”

“I know. Fates, I know.” A tremor ran through him. “But I will not risk you.”

My chest swelled even as that fissure in my heart widened. Because how could Ash not be capable of love? His desire, his need to keep me safe, felt like something one would do when they loved another.

It was what I would do for him.

Which was why I had to do this.

“I’m okay.” Like the Great Conspirator, I was a good liar when I needed to be.

“Sera—”

“I’m okay,” I repeated. “I feel like I did before. I can do this.” I stretched up, guided his head down to mine, then kissed him softly. “I’m going to do this.”

Kissing him once more, I settled on my feet and then turned. Luckily, I didn’t stumble or sway. I lifted my hand as Kolis had done, concentrating on the embers. “Vena ta mayah.”

The essence thrummed weakly throughout my entire body, but it was enough. My temples throbbed, and the cluster of diamonds vibrated, making that high-pitched whirring sound.

Ash cursed from behind me. “Will you ever listen to me?”

“I’m sorry.” My heart skipped, and not in a pleasant way. It caused my breath to hitch. A faint tremor ran through me as I breathed through a rush of dizziness.

“No, you’re not.” Ash came up behind me, circling an arm around my waist.

There was a grounding, soothing quality to the feeling of him touching me that I’d missed so terribly. And it…it wasn’t fair that I experienced it again only now.

The glittering cluster morphed as it neared my palm, forming one diamond shaped like a star.

“I’ve got it,” I said, just in case either he or Attes thought to reach for it.

I didn’t know if they would see what I did, but I didn’t want anyone else witnessing it. Especially not Ash—not without any warning.

The diamond landed in my hand, sending a charge of energy up my arm. There were no sudden flashes of images this time, but that milky light—the soul—pulsed.

“That’s it?” Ash peered over me, clearing his throat. “The light? I can’t feel or sense anything.”

“I think so.” I knew we didn’t have much time, but there were some things I needed to know. “How…how do you think we can put Sotoria’s soul in this?”

“I can’t answer that,” Attes said.

Ash’s arm tightened around me. “Keella would know.”

“You think she’ll help?” I asked, suddenly remembering how she’d questioned Kolis. “She will.” Or at least I really hoped she would after what I’d done to Evander. I looked at Attes. “Can you get her?”

“Of course,” he said solemnly. “I’ll help Elias get Kolis out of here and then retrieve Keella.”

I held the diamond tightly. “Do you think she will also know how to retrieve a soul from the diamond? I’m guessing it’s not like pulling them from other things.” I paused. “Or people.”

“If it’s different, she may know, but I imagine it’s the same as with anything. I would be able to draw it out. Kolis would be able to.” Ash shuddered. “And you. You would be able to.”

After Attes helped Elias haul Kolis onto Setti’s back, Ash folded his arm around me again, drawing me against his chest. The gown was no barrier against the coolness of his flesh, and the contact did what it always did; it elicited a sensual shiver that curled its way down my spine. I turned my head slightly, seeing the bed. Gods, I’d been so afraid I would never feel this again.

“Are we going to shadowstep?” I asked, holding the diamond tightly in my grasp.

“It’s faster.” He cupped his hand over the back of my head and dipped his, pressing his cheek to mine. “Just remember to breathe.”

“I will.”

The air charged, and Ash’s body began to hum. White mist poured out of him, thick and laced with streaks of midnight. I exhaled, then held my breath as the mist spun around us.

“Hold on,” he whispered, then kissed my temple as I heard the rush of air stirred by Nektas taking flight.

I held on as what remained of the cage, and then Dalos, fell away.

It felt like only a heartbeat—possibly two—passed before I inhaled again and caught the scent of fresh air not tainted by the smell of death or staleness. What I breathed in was damp air and sweetness. Lilacs? There was also the sound of tinkling water.

Ash’s fingers curled in my hair as he held me to him. A moment passed. Then another. Neither of us moved as I let the tension out of my body. We were free. Both of us. Safe—at least for right now. And we were together.

Keeping my eyes closed, I felt the mist falling away from us as I soaked in the feel of Ash. Breathed him in. Even though I should be, I was in no rush to part from his embrace. I’d been too long without it.

“You okay?” Ash asked, his breath stirring my hair.

 I nodded, the edges of the diamond digging into my palm. “Are you sure this isn’t a dream?”

“Yes, liessa.” He kissed the top of my head. “We are awake. We are together.”

A shudder went through me. “It feels like one. I didn’t think…” I trailed off, shaking my head.

“What?” he questioned softly.

Words tiptoed to my lips and then just stopped there. Speaking the truth about, well, anything had always been hard. But when it came to talking about how I felt? How I really felt? What I’d been afraid of, or my weaknesses? I didn’t have much experience. Like, at all. I hadn’t been taught that. I’d been groomed to feel nothing and share only lies. So, the fear of saying something wrong or not the right way caused near-crippling anxiety. Even now, with Ash, who I knew wouldn’t judge me, wouldn’t laugh. After all, it wasn’t like he had a lot of experience with this stuff either. Still, it was hard.

Yet according to Holland, the hardest things reaped the greatest rewards.

He was correct.

Hard wasn’t impossible.

And keeping my eyes closed helped. “I…I told myself I would get to see you again. It was how I…” I shook my head slightly. “It was how I did what I needed to…you know, survive.”

Ash’s hand flexed at my hip and then slid to the center of my back. “I know.”

I squeezed my eyes shut harder. “But I was so afraid. And I know you say I’m never truly afraid, but I was. I was terrified that I wouldn’t get to see you. That I wouldn’t be strong enough to deal with everything and ensure I saw you.”

“Strong enough?” Ash dragged his hand up my spine. “You’re the strongest person I know.”

“I don’t know about that,” I murmured.

His fingers tangled in my hair more. “You freed me, Sera. You took Kolis down.”

I bit the inside of my lip. “And I could’ve done that anytime. I could’ve freed you days or weeks ago. I could’ve—” I stopped myself from going there. “I should’ve realized I could do what I did.”

“Fates, Sera.” Ash lowered his head so I felt his breath against my brow when he spoke. “Even if you realized it earlier, you wouldn’t have been able to free me. I would’ve been in stasis,” he pointed out. “And then what? I have a feeling you wouldn’t have done the right thing.”

“I would’ve gone to the Carcers and woke you from stasis,” I told him. “That is the right thing.”

“The right thing would’ve been making a run for it,” he said softly. “Instead of risking being recaptured.”

“Would you have made a run for it, or would you have come for me?”

“I would’ve come for you, but we’re not talking about me.”

I frowned.

“You also freed me from stasis,” he went on. “You got Kolis to wake me.”

Some of the tension began slithering its way back into me. “He told you that?”

His hand made another pass up and down my back. “He did.”

I turned my head, pressing my forehead against his chest. I wanted to ask exactly what Kolis had said, but I also didn’t want to know.

Ash was quiet for a moment. “That allowed me to escape. So, yes, you’re the strongest, bravest person I know,” he said, and my eyes started to sting. “I thought I was going to save you. Each time I woke, it was all I focused on: getting free and getting to you.”

I thought about what he’d said, how he’d torn at his flesh to get free. The sting behind my eyes increased.

“And I should’ve been able to do that. I should’ve gotten you out instead of going after Kolis,” he said, his voice flattening. “I should’ve been smarter.”

“Don’t.” I tried to lift my head, but his hand kept me in place. His skin was cool and hard beneath my palm. “Don’t put that on yourself. You came for me. You fought Kolis, and I distracted you.”

“Sera—” A breath shuddered from him. “None of that matters now. You’re not there anymore. We’re here.”

He was right. All that could’ve and would’ve had no place here. Not anymore.

I slowly tilted my head back and felt the damp air on my face. Somewhat confident I wouldn’t start sobbing, I dared to open my eyes, finally seeing where we were. There were branches, or perhaps vines, full of large, funnel-shaped blue and purple blossoms. Lilacs. I lifted my gaze, my lips parting. The flowers crawled up the slab-gray walls and across what I could see of the ceiling, lacing together to form a canopy.

I felt a twinge in my neck as I leaned farther back. Dappled sunlight penetrated the flowers, sending narrow streams of light down onto a…

Ash’s hands slid away from me, and he allowed me to turn. Wisps of steam drifted up from an earthen pool and danced in the slivers of light.

Based on what limited descriptions I’d heard of the Bonelands, I didn’t think we were there.

“Where are we?”

“We’re in the mortal realm.” Ash stayed close behind me. “This is a hot spring I discovered once. I figured we could both use a couple of moments of privacy and to clean up.”

My gaze crawled over the water, lingering where it churned around the outcroppings of rock. I didn’t need a mirror to know I looked as equally disturbing as Ash.

“I know it’s not your lake, but we’re not that far from the Bonelands. We’re just on the other side of the Skotos.” He paused. “What do you think?”

I blinked. “This is…it’s beautiful.” I shook my head in wonder, taking in the lilacs hanging in clusters from the cavern’s ceiling and the steaming water that glimmered in the slivers of sunlight. “I never even knew such a place existed.”

“It’s pretty hidden away.” Silvery eyes pierced mine as I looked over my shoulder at him. “I’m not sure a single mortal has ever stumbled upon it.”

Holding on to the diamond, I twisted back to the rock pool. “What about Attes? Nektas?”

“They can wait.”

But could we? Could I? The hollowness in my chest hadn’t spread, and my stomach had settled. The ache in my head was manageable. I was tired but not falling down. “Attes will probably need time to find Keella, right?”

“Yes,” he said. “And Nektas knows I’m fine. He can sense if I’m not.”

I nodded, somehow forgetting that a bonded draken could sense when their Primal was in danger. “Does he know about this place?”

“No. No one else does.” His fingers grazed my arm as he scooped the hair clinging to my already-damp skin. “We don’t have much time.”

No, we did not.

“But we have enough.”

There was comfort in knowing that no one would interrupt these stolen moments. A heavy, long breath left me as I looked up through the blossoms to the pinpricks of sunlight. Then I looked down at the diamond. It was warm against my palm, and I could feel it pulsing.

“See the large rocks there, in the center?” Ash pointed to the ones the water lapped against. “As long as you don’t go too far past that, the water will only come to about your shoulders. Beyond that, it does get deeper.”

Tears rushed to my eyes once more, and I blinked them away. Gods, he was so damn thoughtful.

Swallowing, I turned to him. Half of his face was cast in shadow. “How are you feeling?” I glanced down at the diamond. “About this?”

Ash tipped his chin back. “Honestly?” He turned his head. “I don’t know.” His brows knitted. “It’s hard to even think about—if he’s aware in there, knows what is going on outside the diamond.” His jaw flexed, and I hoped—gods, I prayed—that he wasn’t thinking about where The Star had been positioned and what Eythos could’ve seen beneath him. “What it could feel like being trapped in there?”

“It’s…it’s unimaginable.”

He swallowed. “Yeah.”

I glanced down at The Star. The milky light inside had calmed—or at least was no longer zipping back and forth. “I think he’s aware.”

“What—?” Ash cleared his throat, briefly looking away. “What makes you think that?”

“It’s just a feeling. Like maybe the embers of life recognize his soul or something. I don’t know. But the way that light inside moves? It changes speed, becoming…almost frenzied. Now, it’s calm.”

“That light is a soul.” He looked down, almost as if he were finally letting himself do so, and then stepped in closer. His blood-streaked chest rose with a deep breath. “I still don’t feel anything, but that’s what a soul looks like—a good soul. A pure soul would be more intense—a brilliant, blinding white light.”

The light in the diamond—the soul—seemed to float close to the surface of the stone. I wondered what Kolis’s soul would look like.

Gray like the Rot, I imagined. But then I wondered what my soul looked like. My gaze lifted to Ash’s. “Did you know that I wasn’t truly Sotoria?”

His stare met mine. “I couldn’t be sure, but I assumed that what Holland and Penellaphe believed was correct.” His forehead creased as his gaze dropped to the diamond. “When you kept insisting you weren’t her, I did search for an additional imprint of a soul in you, but I never sensed anyone’s presence but yours. That could simply be because your soul is stronger or it’s what I fixated on.”

I had no idea why I was flattered by the fact that he’d fixated on my soul, but I was.

“But it also never mattered to me.”

My breath caught then.

“I didn’t care if you were only Seraphena, or if you had, at one time, been known as Sotoria.” A strand of his hair slipped forward, coming to rest on his cheek. “It didn’t matter to me. You were always Seraphena, no matter what.”

I…I’d been right when I’d thought it hadn’t mattered to Ash either way. Pressing my lips together, I felt tears gathering in my eyes again, but I fought them back. I had to because they were a mix of love and sorrow and because they reminded me this wasn’t fair.

And that unfairness threatened to shatter any calm I’d found.

“Can I…?” Ash cleared his throat again. “Can I hold the diamond?”

My heart ached. I’d never seen him look or sound so vulnerable. Uncertain. “I don’t know if you should.”

His gaze shot to mine. “Why?”

“I saw things when I touched The Star. I think it’s also how I know this is where your father’s soul has been trapped.” I smoothed my thumb over one of the points. “I saw how it was created and…how your father died.”

The muscles in his shoulders bunched and tightened. “What did you see?”

I wanted to ask if he really wanted to do this, but I knew the answer. It was the same as mine would be. I would need to know.

So, I told him.

I told him everything except for the part about his mother. I just…I just didn’t think he needed to know that. And then have to process the possibility that his mother had cared for Kolis, maybe even loved him once, only to be slain by him. Perhaps that wasn’t my decision to make, and I was wrong for keeping it from him, but I couldn’t see how having that piece of knowledge would benefit him. Maybe if we had more time, I would tell him everything I’d learned beyond what I saw in the diamond, even the claim that Eythos had killed Sotoria—something I wasn’t sure was entirely true and didn’t know the circumstances of.

But now? I shared with him how Eythos had tried to talk to Kolis and how he’d told his brother they could move past everything Kolis had done, saying he still loved him.

Ash’s face became a cold, impenetrable mask as I spoke, and in that moment, he looked as one would imagine a Primal of Death to appear.

“Kolis didn’t believe him,” I continued, speaking quietly, even though no one could hear but us. “So, he stabbed Eythos with a dagger made of the bones of the Ancients to prove that Eythos lied about still loving him. He…he didn’t plan on killing him.”

His eyes went flat. “Bullshit.”

“I don’t think it is,” I said, knowing that I had made the right decision not to share the piece about Mycella. “He hadn’t known that Eythos had given up the last of his embers. He didn’t realize how weak Eythos was.”

Ash’s nostrils flared. “Did Kolis claim that?”

“I saw it,” I reminded him. “I heard it. Eythos told Kolis he knew he was capable of killing him, but he’d hoped he wasn’t right. I saw Kolis cry.” My eyes closed. “Kolis didn’t realize I would see anything when I touched the diamond, but what I saw surprised me so much that I blurted out that I’d seen him cry.” A knot lodged in my throat. “He…he knew then that I’d seen something.”

“Is that what caused this?” His voice thinned with barely leashed anger, each word spoken slowly, bitten out like the flick of a whip. I hadn’t heard him move, but I felt the cool brush of his fingers on my throat. “The bruises?”

That knot expanded as I forced a shrug. “He wasn’t too pleased about me seeing what really happened.” I opened my eyes, quickly moving on. “I think he’s ashamed of what he did—ashamed of the truth.”

“I don’t give a fuck what he’s ashamed of.” Ash’s hand dropped, closing into a fist. “Or that he didn’t mean to kill my father. He still did it. He did everything else. He still did this to you.”

“I know.” I swallowed. “Kolis is…” I shook my head. “He’s not exactly right in the head.”

“That is by far the understatement of several lifetimes.”

“True.” I stepped back. “Anyway, I don’t know if you’ll see any of that, and I just don’t want you to. You’ve already seen too much horrible stuff.”

His head cocked. “I’m a Primal of Death, liessa. I’ve seen all manner of horrible things. Atrocities you couldn’t even imagine. I’ve even been the one to commit some.”

“But you don’t need to see this,” I told him.

Ash watched me for several moments, turning quiet and intense, leaving me feeling exposed in a way that was wholly different from how I’d felt when Kolis stared at me. “Thank you.”

I frowned. “For what?”

“For caring enough to think of me,” he said. “For…for loving me enough to prevent that.”

For some inane reason, my cheeks warmed. “You would do the same.”

Faint wisps of eather began seeping back into his irises. “I would.”

And I knew he would.

So how…how could he not love? That question rose to the tip of my tongue, but there was no point in asking the pointless.

“We should probably get cleaned up,” I said instead, looking back at the hot springs. “Though I feel bad for getting in there while so filthy.”

Ash gave me a wry grin.

I searched for a place to put the diamond but only saw faint patches of grass peeking through the rocks. I caught sight of the relatively clean hem of my gown. I bent, carefully placing the diamond on the stone before gripping the gauzy material. I yanked, and it ripped easily.

“There are far easier ways to undress, liessa.”

I smiled. “I know. It just feels sort of wrong to leave the diamond on the cavern floor.” I tore a strip of material free, then wrapped The Star in it. “There.”

There was a look to his features that I didn’t quite understand as I rose. “I wish I could do what you do,” I said. “And know what you’re feeling.”

“I’m not even sure you’d know if you had the ability because I don’t know what I’m feeling.” Ash’s brows furrowed, and his gaze swept over me. “Did he always have you dressed like this?”