Текст книги "A fire in the flash"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 37 страниц)

“That means nothing,” Ione stated, and I had a feeling the goddess was lying again. “The rebirth of a soul is not common enough to know exactly how it will appear.”

My mind raced as the two argued. The first time Sotoria had died…gods, it had been hundreds of years ago, if not close to a thousand, back when Kolis ruled as the true Primal of Death, and his brother the Primal of Life. So exactly how old was Callum? Had Kolis created Callum even before he stole the embers from Eythos?

Or had Callum known her decades later, after she’d been ripped away from the peace of the Vale and brought back to life—after Kolis stole the embers and brought her back? No one knew exactly how long she had lived that second life. But still, even that was hundreds of years ago.

Callum was clearly old, and Kolis could have been able to create Revenants before he stole the Primal embers of life.

“You should drink.” Ione offered the glass to me. “It will help settle your mind.”

Hand trembling slightly, I reached out and took the glass from her. Our eyes met. “Thank you,” I said, hoping she knew it wasn’t just the water I was thanking her for.

A faint smile appeared on her thin lips, softening her sharper features. “You’re welcome.”

I took a sip of the fruity water and then gulped as Ione turned back to Kolis. His hands continuously opened and closed at his sides.

“I am happy that you have found your graeca,” Ione stated, and I nearly choked on my water, my eyes and throat burning. “You must be overjoyed.”

“I…I am,” Kolis murmured.

I thought maybe he should sit down since he appeared as if he were close to falling over.

“Is there anything else you need of me, Your Majesty?” Ione asked.

“No.” His hands stilled. “Your assistance is appreciated and won’t be forgotten.”

Ione nodded as she stepped back, bowing to Kolis before facing me. She smiled, the eather now a faint pulse behind her pupils. It was quick. I saw it. Kolis didn’t. His attention was fixed on me. I could feel it, like I was being suffocated in a too-heavy, coarse blanket.

“Good day, Consort.” Ione inclined her head.

I mumbled something in response.

“Ione,” Kolis called out, and my fingers twitched around the glass. The false warmth in his voice immediately caused warning bells to go off.

The goddess stopped at the cage door. “Yes, Your Majesty?”

I lowered the glass to my lap, watching Kolis’s lips curve into a tight grin. “You addressed her as Consort.”

“Yes, I…” Her arched brows knitted. “Was I not supposed to?”

“No,” Kolis answered. “You were not.”

Ione’s wary gaze darted between us. “I…I apologize. I’m—”

“It’s okay,” I interjected. “That is my title.”

Kolis’s head turned toward me, his eyes as still and flat as the waters of my lake, causing the hairs on the back of my neck to rise. “It is no longer how you are to be addressed.”

A sudden wave of dread flooded me, and I struggled not to show it on my face. It took everything for me to slip on that veil of nothingness again.

His stare held mine. “Your coronation was not recognized nor approved by me.”

My mouth parted in incredulity. That was a bald-faced lie.

“Therefore, the coronation itself was invalid,” he continued. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing as he turned his attention back to the goddess. “Do you understand?”

“I…I was unaware of this.” Ione lowered her gaze and nodded. “I do understand.”

I was nowhere near being the blank canvas I needed to be now as I clenched my teeth. My fury had nothing to do with losing my perceived rank in some ridiculous class structure; it was the message that he was sending to the other Primals. That any accusations of Kolis breaking tradition by taking me could be discredited.

Only the Primals Attes, and his brother Kyn, had been present when Kolis gave Ash and me his permission. The latter would likely back up whatever Kolis claimed, but Attes…

He had sworn an oath to me.

However, the false King wasn’t aware of that. Just as he had no idea that Ione had lied to him.

My anger cooled as Ione crossed the chamber. Attes would have to support Ash, and that included telling the truth about Kolis giving his permission. Of course, the other Primals could choose not to believe Attes or Ash, but Kolis’s plans weren’t as clever as he thought they were.

“Your Majesty,” Callum began once Ione was gone.

“I know what you think, Callum. I understand it is hard to believe. And accept,” Kolis said, the flatness leaving his gaze, and the golden flecks burning brightly. “And you’re right. She looks different, but the similarities are there. I can see them.”

Callum said nothing, but he too stared at me.

Gods. One was bad enough, but both of them scrutinizing me? I wanted to gouge their eyes out.

“But it is her,” Kolis continued. The expression on Callum’s face grew increasingly more disturbing, reminding me of how I knew I’d looked at Tavius. “After all this time, my graeca has returned to me.”

Dragging my gaze from Callum, I looked up at the false King and felt my lips curve into a smile—a real one that had nothing to do with his words. His conviction meant only one thing I cared about. “I was telling you the truth before.”

“I can see that.” Kolis’s stare softened, bringing life to his features once more. “I will honor my side of the deal,” he told me. “And you will honor yours.”

My stomach hollowed, but I felt myself nod and smile.

His chest rose with a deep breath as he looked at me. A second passed. Then several. My smile began to fade. “Callum, I will find you later.”

The Revenant bowed stiffly. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

As a kiss of unease bore down on the nape of my neck, I watched Callum leave the chamber, closing the door behind him.

“When you smile, you look more like I remember,” Kolis said, his voice thicker.

My gaze shifted back to the false King.

Was he closer?

I hadn’t heard him move, but it felt as if he were. And as he stared, his features lost some of that softness, turning thinner, starker. My unease grew at the clear change that had occurred upon my smile. Tiny goose bumps spread across my flesh. The embers stirred, but something else moved restlessly in my chest near them. It was an awareness, one that warned me I was not safe being alone with him.

I started to recognize the look in his eyes. I’d seen it in Ash before—a predatory need—but it didn’t even remotely evoke the same response coming from Kolis. My body didn’t flush hot with desire. I turned cold to the very core.

Fuck. I shouldn’t have smiled at him—

Wait, what was I thinking? I shouldn’t have smiled? I had only fucking smiled at the Primal. That was all. It was not an invitation, and I wasn’t ready. I was nowhere near the blank canvas I needed to be.

You will never be ready for that, a voice whispered, causing me to jerk, and my pulse to stutter. Had that…had that been Sotoria’s thought? Could she actually talk to me? Or was I losing my mind? The latter was likely, and I really needed to pull it together because I needed to figure a way out of this.

Despite believing that Kolis wanted more than to just share a bed with me yesterday, I wasn’t ready for what I saw in his stare now.

It was different than what I’d seen the day before. It was fiery. Alive. More potent. He’d needed me to be Sotoria. Now, he fully believed that I was her, and that changed things.

I stood suddenly, mouth drying. Kolis showed no reaction to me moving. “I am feeling quite tired.”

“I have spent centuries waiting for you.” He spoke as if I hadn’t, and the almost guttural sound of his voice sent chills down my spine.

“That’s a long time,” I began, struggling to keep the creeping panic from my voice. “But—” I gasped.

Kolis was suddenly in front of me, causing me to take a step in retreat and battle the natural urge to force him to back off. “I have filled similar spaces with countless imitations of you.”

I cringed.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have tried to recreate what I felt for you,” he said, taking my glass from my numb fingers. “But I was lonely.”

He’d really misunderstood my reaction to that statement.

His eyes closed. “I have been so damn lonely, so’lis.”

My muscles cramped with the effort it took to hold myself still instead of using my years of training on him. “And I’m sorry for that.”

Kolis pulled me to him, wrapping his arms around my stiff body so tightly that I felt his heart pounding against my chest. I had no idea what he’d done with my glass. “Not as sorry as I have been,” he murmured, cupping the back of my head.

Arms pinned to my sides, my fingers splayed. “Kolis—”

“You don’t have to worry about Kyn or anyone ever again. I have you now.” His head dropped to mine, and he inhaled deeply.

My eyes widened. Was he fucking smelling me again? I attempted to gain some space, as the horrid gown was no barrier, but his hold was immoveable.

“I need you,” he whispered.

All the muscles in my body went rigid. And, dear gods, revolting images flashed in my mind, threatening to flood the waning emptiness I’d crafted inside myself.

“I just need to hold you.” Kolis shuddered.

I blinked.

Okay, once again, that wasn’t where my horrified mind had gone, but I wasn’t sure if it was any better. I didn’t want to be held by him.

Either I hadn’t given him an answer in a timely enough manner, or he simply didn’t wait, because he was suddenly sitting on the edge of the bed, and I was in his lap, my godsdamn feet dangling in the air.

His hand tangled in my hair as he continued to breathe me in. He was still shaking, and my entire being was in the midst of a frozen rebellion, barely able to force a wisp of air into my lungs. Inside me, near the embers, a scream built. One only I could hear.

I struggled to stay calm and searched for a way to take his mind off me. “Will you release Nyktos now?”

He pressed his forehead against mine. “What?” he asked with a laugh that sounded uncertain.

My heart thudded heavily. “We made a deal,” I reminded him. “You promised to release him if—”

“I know what I promised,” he cut in, his voice changing, becoming thinner. “I cannot believe you would bring him up as I hold you.”

I suddenly became aware of how still Kolis had gone, and how hot his body had become.

“That you would even speak his name.” He drew back, and I saw then that his flesh…fuck, it had thinned. There was no golden aura of eather, and I saw the faint gleam of bone beneath his skin. Considering the last time I’d seen something like this, it wasn’t a good sign.

My fight-or-flight response kicked in. I jerked back as far as I could. Our gazes locked. It was just for a heartbeat or two, his eyes pools of golden-flecked eather.

Then he struck like a pit viper, sinking his fangs into my throat.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

A jolt coursed through my entire being. The sudden shock of agony ramped up the screams coming from within. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move as my gaze swung upward.

But I welcomed the pain, held on to it tightly as his mouth moved against my throat. My hands spasmed and then fisted. I stared at the gleaming gold bars, the searing fire coursing through my veins like a thousand knives pricking my flesh. Darkness crept into the edges of my vision—

The embers pulsed wildly, pressing against my skin. The shadows crowding my eyes vanished in a flash of silver. I sucked in a whimper as Kolis’s head shifted. His fangs eased their brutal hold on my throat, and the agony…oh, gods, the pain was fading. No. No. No. My chest rose with a too-short breath as unwelcome warmth crept into my veins.

No. No. No.

This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t. My nails dug into my palms, the little sparks of pain lost in a grotesque, twisting pulse as he sucked on the wound.

I didn’t want this.

The…the screaming had stopped. I felt the presence in my chest go quiet, while the embers pulsed and flared, responding to my disgust, whirling fury, and rising desperation to stop this.

The essence swelled, pressing against my skin, and the near-instinctual drive to tap into it began to take hold. My skin started to hum as the cage and chamber became drenched in silver—

No.

Fighting the instinct to tap into the embers, I willed them to calm. I had to. My heart thudded. If I used them against Kolis, it would anger him, and Ash…he was still imprisoned. I couldn’t risk him. I wouldn’t. He was too important. I could deal with this, just as he had when Veses came to him to feed.

Focusing on my breathing, the essence calmed, though my heart thundered. I desperately tried to pull together the tattered remains of the veil of nothingness that used to be like a second skin to me. I could do this. I could deal with this. I’d spent years preparing for something like this.

But that was before Ash.

Nausea churned in my stomach, even as a disturbing heaviness settled in my chest and lower. Kolis groaned, his arms tightening as he drank from me. This…this was nothing like before. I clamped my jaw shut, my gaze fixed on the grouping of diamonds above me. They seemed to throb, like some light within them moved rapidly. Kolis sucked deeply from my vein, his hips jerking against my backside—

Oh, gods, I was going to vomit. I was going to fucking vomit.

How far would this go?

Not that far.

Fear pierced the undesired haze. Breathe in. I knew—oh, gods, I knew then that I couldn’t do anything to gain Kolis’s trust. Hold. There was no fooling me. If this escalated even further, I didn’t know what I would do, but it would be bad. Breathe out. I could feel that in the violent hum of power within me. Hold.

One of Kolis’s hands skimmed down my side, clasping my hip and leaving a trail of unwanted shivers. This wasn’t happening to me. I wasn’t here. This didn’t matter—

That wasn’t working.

I squeezed my eyes shut against a rush of tears, losing concentration as my thoughts careened wildly. I hated him. I hated Kolis, and I hated Eythos for creating this situation. I hated the Fates for preventing Eythos from telling his son. And I fucking loathed how this reminded me of Tavius and how he’d held me down in my bedchamber.

I was trapped.

The embers stirred again, responding to my maelstrom of emotions.

I kept my eyes closed and thought of Ash. His features pieced together in my mind, and I recalled the night we’d fallen asleep together on his balcony. That had been a first for us. For me. I clung to that memory, erasing Kolis. I wiped him from this experience. I removed him. He wasn’t here. Nor was I.

I was back in the Shadowlands, tucked against Ash, safe and happy. That was where I retreated and stayed until Kolis finally stopped feeding and moving against me.

He grew impossibly still once more, his body as rigid as mine. My fingers and palms ached from how tightly I’d clenched them. I counted the seconds silently ticking by, barely breathing as I did.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Kolis’s arms loosened and then fell away. I shot to my feet like an arrow released, my hands and legs trembling. The back side of my gown was fucking damp.

Bile climbed into my throat. I took a step back and lifted my gaze to Kolis, feeling the embers pressing against my skin once more. A jumble of emotions roared through me, leaving me panting. Rage mottled my skin, and something I shouldn’t even feel pricked at my flesh, leaving hundreds of brutal cuts as part of me—a foolish, somehow naïve part—couldn’t believe what had just happened.

Kolis sat there, a curtain of blond hair shielding his features as he looked down at his lap and the blotch of acutely visible wetness. A shudder ran through him.

“I’m sorry.” His head lifted abruptly. “I…I have shamed myself,” he stammered. “I’ve shamed you.”

The back of my neck crawled.

“I lost control.” His eyes closed, his features tensing. “I…I didn’t mean to.”

All I could do was stare at him.

“I wanted this time to be different. I didn’t want to frighten you with my passion and jealousy. You must forgive me,” he fretted. “I was just overcome with emotion. I’ve waited so long for you.”

I couldn’t hear him. The screams in my head drowned out his excuses. They were Sotoria’s and mine, full of rage, disbelief, and pure hatred. They sounded sad, and all the while, he…he fucking sounded agonized.

Kolis suddenly stood, taking a step toward me.

I tensed.

His eyes closed once more, his features drawn. “That will never happen again.” He took a deep breath, lifted his lids, and fixed his gaze on me. “Do you understand? You do not have to fear that.”

I counted the seconds again.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

I felt myself nod, but I didn’t believe him.

Kolis swallowed. “Please…” He cleared his throat. “Please say something.”

“A bath,” I said, my voice strangely steady. “I would like a bath.”

I sat in the tub, my knees tucked to my chest. The hot water the Chosen had brought in mere minutes after Kolis left the chamber had long since cooled.

I didn’t know how long I’d sat here. Minutes? Hours? All I knew was that I had no fear when it came to bathing. The moment Callum and the Chosen left the chamber, I’d stripped off the disgusting gown and all but dove in. The horror of the incident that had occurred beyond the privacy screen I now stared at had replaced that fear.

There were so many more things to dread now.

Things every woman worried about, whether mortal or god. Things I knew Kolis was capable of the moment I learned what had been done to Sotoria. Things I knew I would have to face. From the moment I’d told him I was Sotoria, I’d known I wouldn’t be like his other favorites. He wouldn’t be content only observing. I knew those things would happen. It was one of the reasons I’d tried to escape and screamed fuck the greater good.

But from the moment I decided to use his love for Sotoria to my advantage, I’d known what would happen. And knew I might even have to initiate it.

I’d told myself I was ready. That I could do it. I’d convinced myself. I’d known this could happen. But the foolish, naïve shock still lingered. I didn’t understand. I couldn’t. Or maybe I wouldn’t. Because I’d prepared for the likelihood that I’d have to seduce Kolis to gain his trust and Ash’s freedom. And while it wasn’t like I was okay with that, I at least had some semblance of control.

I’d had no control a bit ago.

None.

And I’d had no choice.

I really hadn’t. Because choosing not to risk Ash or my physical well-being was not a fucking choice. I had been wrong earlier. Holland had been wrong. Choices didn’t always exist. Not real ones.

Reaching up, I tentatively touched the bite on my neck and winced. He could’ve at least closed the wound. Dropping my hand, I dug my chin into my knees, the muscles in my body tense despite having soaked in hot water. Yet I felt numb. Detached. I closed my eyes.

I was lucky. This time. It could’ve been worse than him getting off while he fed. It could’ve gone further than that.

I didn’t feel lucky, though.

I felt disgusted. Enraged. Desperate. Shamed. And angry at myself for even feeling that because I knew better. I felt weak. And I wasn’t that. With or without the embers, I was fucking tough. Physically. Mentally. I’d cracked a little before, but I was not weak. Still, I felt that way. I felt everything as I sat in the tepid water.

But at the same time, I felt absolutely nothing.

CHAPTER TWENTY

Shortly after breakfast was served, the silver hawk flew in through the narrow window, arcing gracefully as it glided past the chandelier.

Leaving my glass on the table, I took a step back. I assumed it was Attes, but Kolis could take the form of a hawk, too.

Staying quiet, I watched the hawk tuck its wings in close, careful not to brush the bars as it flew between them. The feathered creature circled near the cluster of diamonds and then dove. At the same moment, starlight swallowed the hawk, and the embers hummed. I relaxed when I caught sight of brownish-blond hair.

Attes stood before me. “Meyaah Liessa.” He folded an arm over his chest and bowed.

I arched a brow at the greeting. “That’s not necessary.”

“But it is.” He straightened. “You are the—”

“I know. Whatever. You’re naked.” I paused. “Again.”

A half-grin appeared, softening the scar on his face with the faint appearance of a dimple. I was willing to bet the combination of the three bewitched many.

As I reached for a pitcher, he summoned clothing. “I’m jealous of that talent,” I admitted. “I would manifest actual clothes.”

“I could comment on that,” he drawled. “However, your husband would likely cut out my tongue and eyes and feed them to Setti.”

Your husband. A pang lit up my chest. Two words I’d never thought would affect me so. Two words I’d never thought would apply to me.

Clearing my throat, I lifted the pitcher. “Would you like a drink?”

“Thank you, but I cannot stay long. Kolis is, well…his movements have been unpredictable of late.”

I snorted.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t come back sooner,” he said. “But I do have news for you.”

I faced him. He was entirely covered from his ankles to his throat in black. He must truly be worried about Ash learning about his nakedness because that was a bit excessive.

“I hope it’s about the husband you’re clearly afraid of.”

Attes was quiet, so much so that I thought I might not have asked the question out loud. I lifted my gaze to his, about to repeat what I’d said, when I saw what he stared at.

My throat.

I stepped back, turning my head as if that could somehow undo what he’d seen.

Heat crept up my cheeks. “Do you have—?”

“Kolis?” he snarled.

I stiffened. “No, it was two very large mosquitos.” My joke went over like a ton of manure-smeared bricks as eather pulsed in his eyes. “I’m okay.”

“Seraphena—”

“I am,” I stressed. “All he did was feed from me.” I lifted my chin. “Do you have news about Nyktos?”

It took a moment, but Attes’s chest finally moved with an exhale. “He is being awakened from stasis,” he said. “It’s taken longer than expected.”

Pressure clamped down on my chest, and my mind became a whirlwind of fear for Ash. It cracked a bit of the veil I’d donned. “Do you know why?”

“I don’t for sure, but…” The angles of his face sharpened. “I have my suspicions.”

I stepped forward. “Tell me.”

He hesitated for a second. “I think he was incapacitated with a weapon made of the bones of an Ancient.”

 My hand trembled as I heard what he’d said to me before about such a weapon. They can even put a Primal into years-long stasis. “But he’s no longer incapacitated?”

Attes shook his head.

Relief swept through me, and I squeezed my eyes shut. This was good news. Great news.

“The only reason I can think of for why Kolis would do such a thing is because he plans to free him,” Attes said. “I’m taking that to mean you’ve made progress with your plans.”

“I have.” I opened my eyes. “Kolis has promised to release him.”

Now, Attes’s lashes swept down. “Thank the Fates.”

“Don’t be too thankful yet,” I advised. “Not until he’s released. Until then…” I turned, walking to the bars facing the closed chamber doors. “Until then, I’ll have to be careful not to give him a reason to find a loophole.”

“I can only imagine how hard this must be for you.”

“Actually, you can imagine.” I dragged my thumb across the rim of my cup.

 There was a brief silence. “Is this deal like the one you made to free Rhain?”

Tension crept into my shoulders. “I’m guessing Kyn told you about that.” The corners of my lips tightened. “Your brother is a dick, by the way.”

I heard a heavy sigh behind me. “Yeah, he is,” he said. “Though he wasn’t always.”

I turned to him. “I find that hard to believe.”

“I can’t blame you for that, but if you’d known him a couple hundred years ago? You would’ve seen a different side of him.” Attes dragged a hand over his chest. “A peaceful one.”

My brows rose. A couple hundred years ago? “I suppose I’ll have to take your word for it.”

A wry smile appeared. “Did Nyktos tell you anything about why a Primal would either enter Arcadia or go into a deep stasis?”

“He mentioned it,” I told him. “Something about them entering Arcadia when they were ready.”

“When they’re ready.” He laughed roughly. “That’s a nice way of putting it. Granted, some probably were simply tired of this existence and ready for what awaits in Arcadia, but others weren’t ready by choice, Seraphena. They either had to enter Arcadia or go into a deep stasis because they were changing, becoming the worst of what their powers could do.”

Something about what Attes said was familiar. I wasn’t sure if it was something Ash had shared with me, or what the embers knew.

“How each of our essences influences mortals and gods does eventually affect us. For example, Nyktos’s is rooted in death, but benevolent death—a just ending of one beginning. There is another side to that. One more malevolent that seeks death for the sake of death,” he explained. “Maia can evoke love in others and herself, but it can turn dark, obsessive, and destructive. Even the essence that resides in Keella, who sees to the rebirth of all life, not just mortals, can turn wrong. The essence tied to each of us Primals is capable of great good but also terrible malevolence.”

I thought I understood where he was going with this. “So, the vengeance part of Kyn’s essence has a greater hold on him?”

Attes nodded, lowering his hand. “Just as accord will no longer suit me someday, and I will be driven by war. It happens to all of us, and all we can do to prevent it is either enter stasis to quell that side of us, or pass into Arcadia, where we would remain.”

“If it happens to all of you, why is Keella not a raging bitch?” I asked. “Why are you not consumed by war? You and Kyn are the same age.”

“Both Keella and I have entered stasis more than once over the years,” Attes shared, surprising me. “But that doesn’t mean it’s not a struggle to keep from caving to the more toxic side of our abilities. It’s like an infection slowly invading our flesh and blood.”

“So, that’s why Kyn is a dick?”

A wry grin appeared. “Partly. He’s always been a bit difficult. But when Kolis did what he did? That didn’t help. Any of us. The taint spread.” His features tightened and then smoothed out with a sigh. “None of that is an excuse, obviously. I just wanted…” He frowned as if he wasn’t sure what he wanted.

But I thought I might know. “You just wanted to let me know that your brother wasn’t always this way. I understand.” I took a small drink. “Going into stasis helps? Like if your brother went to sleep, would he awaken…less dickish?”

Attes’s gaze flickered to mine, but he didn’t answer for a moment. “I hope so. I hope it hasn’t progressed that far in him.”

And if it had? “How will he respond to Nyktos taking his rightful place as the Primal of Life and the King of Gods?”

His hand fisted at his side. “I can only believe that he will respond wisely.”

As in he couldn’t allow himself to think otherwise, because Attes knew what that meant. Once Ash had the embers of life, he could Ascend another to rule in Kyn’s place.

“I should leave,” Attes said. “If I learn of anything else, I will do my best to let you know.”

I nodded, resisting the urge to ask him to stay. It was nice having someone to talk to whom I didn’t want to murder, even if we discussed things that left me feeling a bit hollow.

Attes turned, but like last time, he stopped. I waited for him to ask about Sotoria. “Are you okay, Seraphena?”

Surprised by his question, it took me a moment to answer. “Yes. Of course.”

Attes exhaled heavily and nodded. He gave me one last look before starbursts swept over him, and he returned to his hawk form.

My eyes closed the moment he left the chamber, but I still saw the look he’d given me. It had been quick, yet I knew…

I knew he hadn’t believed my answer to his question.

The diaphanous golden gown trailed behind me as I paced the length of the cage.

As always, I wasn’t alone.

The Revenant stood a few feet from the gilded bars, his arms crossed over his tunic. Today, he wore black. Somehow, that made the thickly painted, golden mask even creepier.

 I looked toward the closed doors, my stomach twisting with knots of anxiety. At least a day had passed since Attes visited, and it’d been two since Kolis agreed to free Ash and the incident happened.

I picked up my pace as I twisted Aios’s necklace between my fingers.

I hadn’t seen Kolis since he left that day, and the most fucked-up thing was that it was the same as learning I would likely be unable to kill Kolis. It hadn’t filled me with any relief. I was too worried about Ash to appreciate Kolis’s absence—and, hopefully, his all-consuming humiliation.

What if Kolis had changed his mind? He can’t, I reminded myself. He’d made an oath, and Attes had said that Ash was waking up. Had something else happened? Had Rhain managed to launch some sort of attack, accidentally stalling Ash’s release? I closed the fingers of my right hand, pressing them into the golden swirl on my palm.

“I don’t believe you,” Callum stated.

I shot him an arch look. “About what?”

“As if you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

I had a few guesses. “Pretend I don’t and enlighten me.”

His pale gaze tracked my brisk movements. “I don’t trust that you won’t attempt to escape the first chance you get, nor do I believe that you’re seriously open to loving Kolis.”

Well, he would be right about both things. “Okay.”

He cocked his head.

“What?” I challenged. “Think whatever you want. You’re insignificant to me.”

“You should care,” he replied, and I rolled my eyes. “Kolis will realize that you’re lying.”

I was worried about that, because if that thing happened again, I didn’t think I’d be able to stop myself from reacting.

And that wouldn’t bode well for me.

“And he will realize it,” Callum added. “Because you’re not Sotoria.”

My heart skipped with unease, but I didn’t show it. The veil of nothingness was back in place. Mostly. “And why do you think that? Because I don’t exactly resemble what you recall?”

“That’s part of it.”

Curiosity got the better of me. I stopped in front of him. “If you knew me from before, you have to be old.”

A narrow smile appeared. “I am old.”

“How old?”

“Very old,” he replied. “And I did not know you from before.”

A trickle of unease that didn’t feel entirely mine tiptoed down my spine. “Clearly, Kolis favors you. You’re important to him.”