Текст книги "Every Last Breath"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 20 страниц)

“I’m fine.” Roth looked at me. “You?”

“I’m good.” I reached out, grabbing Jasmine’s hand as she turned to leave. “Thank you.”

“No thanks are ever needed.” With that, she left the room.

Glancing down at my shoulder, I saw the glistening puckered skin. The wound was nowhere near as bad as it had originally felt.

“Want me to grab you a new sweater?” Roth asked, and when I nodded, he headed to my closet, returning with a thick chunky one that buttoned up the front. He was quiet as he took care of the buttons and then knelt, pulling off my boots.

As he kicked his own off, Morris appeared in the door, carrying two glasses. Both had orange juice in them, and that brought a watery smile to my face. He walked them over to the nightstand, and as always, he didn’t say a word. When he turned, he reached out, cupping my cheek with a cool hand.

The smile was back on his face and this time it reached his eyes. Then he patted my cheek and left the room, leaving the door half-open.

“That man...he is strange,” commented Roth.

“He’s wonderful,” I immediately defended Morris.

Roth shook his head slowly. “I’m not disputing that, but...”

“But what?”

“I don’t know. He just...gives me the creeps.” Roth frowned. “And nothing gives me the creeps.”

I made a face. “There’s nothing creepy about him. Morris is the best and he’s an old man—not exactly a threat to you.”

“Like I said, I don’t know how to explain it.” Turning to me, he scrubbed his fingers through his hair. “Tonight has been...”

“A complete mess?” I scooted over, resting against the back of the headboard as I picked up the cup of OJ.

Roth sat beside me so we were shoulder to shoulder. He stretched his legs out. “Yeah, that about sums it up.”

I took a sip and then another before setting it aside. When I looked at him, I saw that the bruise along his jaw was already fading, but I brushed my fingers around it. “Are you okay?”

His brows knitted. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I do.”

“There’s no need.”

I sighed. “Roth.”

“I’m fine,” he said finally. “It doesn’t even hurt.”

“Good.” I struggled to take an even breath. “Tonight... I don’t even know what to think. I can’t believe Abbot is gone.”

He took a deep breath. “You know how I feel about that man, what he aided in doing to you, but I know he raised you.” He slid his hand around mine and squeezed. “I know what happened isn’t easy for you to accept.”

Closing my eyes, I leaned back. “He died protecting me. I can’t... God, I don’t even know what to say. I was so angry with him before this, but in the end, he came through. I...” I stopped, opening my eyes. They felt wet, and when I spoke, my voice was hoarse. “I still loved him, you know?”

Roth brought my hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss atop it. “It’s obvious that he still loved you as well.”

“Yeah.” I blinked my tears away and drew in a shaky breath.

There was a pause. “Do you want to go check in on Zayne?”

I turned my head toward him, not as surprised by the thoughtfulness as I once might have been.

“Yes, but I think... I think he probably needs a little bit of time.”

“Probably,” he murmured, reaching over and tucking a strand of my hair back behind my ear.

Forcing my thoughts to the newest problem we’d discovered, I pulled our joined hands into my lap.

“The Lilin...it told me that we were in this together. You heard it say that. I guess we didn’t realize how literally we should take his words.”

Roth made a low, angry sound in the back of his throat. “I didn’t see this coming.”

“Me, neither,” I replied drily. “But it makes sense. Part of me created it. As did a part of Lilith. Grim told me that we were joined, the three of us, but he failed to really go into detail about what that meant.”

“Of course he did.”

“That would’ve been good to know,” I went on tiredly. “I mean, that’s a pretty big detail. If we kill the Lilin, then it kills me. And I’m assuming that works both ways.”

Roth’s gaze turned intent. “There has to be another way. If there’s not, we’ll just find a way to keep it...out of trouble.”

I arched a brow at that, because for one thing, I didn’t think there was anything we could do to keep the Lilin out of trouble short of killing it. But even if we did manage to contain it while letting it live, where did that leave Sam? His soul would be lost, plus all the souls of the congregation the Lilin had taken out. Granted, those people were fanatics, but that didn’t mean they deserved that kind of fate.

Roth’s eyes shifted to the doorway, and I followed his gaze, my breath catching when I saw that it was Zayne. I opened my mouth but he spoke first. “Can I come in?”

“Of course.” I pulled up my legs to give him room, but he lingered by the door, just inside the room. My heart ached for him, for everything. “Are you...?”

“I don’t... I don’t even know what to think.” He shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants. “But that’s not why I’m here. I wanted to apologize.”

My mouth dropped open.

“I didn’t know that when I stabbed the Lilin it was going to hurt you.” His crystalline gaze met mine. “I would never hurt you. No matter what. I didn’t—”

“I know. I know you didn’t. I never once thought you’d do that if you’d known. We didn’t even know,” I insisted. “You don’t need to apologize. That’s the last thing you need to do right now.

Seriously.”

Some of the conflict eased out of his features. Not a lot, but some. “Do we know why this happened?”

Part of me wanted to tell him he didn’t need to worry about this, but then I realized that he might be seeking to distract himself, and I didn’t want to take that from him. I told him what Roth and I had just discussed.

“There’s got to be a way to fix this,” Zayne said when I was finished. “To separate you from the Lilin.”

“But what if there is no way around it?” A tremor worked its way through me. “What if the Lilin and I are really joined, like we appear to be, and—”

“Don’t say that.” Roth’s eyes brightened fiercely. “Don’t even finish that thought.”

“He’s right,” Zayne said, rubbing his hand over his chest. “There has to be another way. We just don’t know what it is yet.”

I wanted to believe that there was something else, but if we were connected, we were connected.

“We could check with the seer,” Roth suggested.

Turning to him slowly, I stared at him. “The little kid?”

He nodded. “If anyone might know, it would be him. The key is just getting him to spill.”

“The seer?” Zayne looked confused.

“The kid who kind of communes with, well, I don’t know what he communes with, but he doesn’t work for either the heavens or Hell.” I paused, grinning slightly. “He likes to play ‘Assassin’s Creed.’”

“And he likes chicken,” Roth added.

I snorted. “We can check with him tomorrow.” A moment passed and I frowned. “He’ll probably know we’re coming.”

Roth smirked.

My gaze flipped to Zayne. Shadows had blossomed under his weary eyes, and he looked... He looked lost.

“Layla, you know you can stay here.” His shoulders tensed. “Both of you can stay here as long as you need. Okay? And if you leave—just be careful. I have... I need to go.”

Slipping off the bed, I walked over to him. Before he could leave, I wrapped my arms around him.

He stiffened, and then he turned in my embrace. Reaching down, he folded his arms around me.

Against my cheek, he whispered in a gruff voice, “Thank you.”

And then he let go and left the room, closing the door behind him.

I closed my eyes again, squeezing them shut. I don’t know how long I stood there, but when I turned around, I made my way to the bed. Climbing in, I returned to the position I was in before, shoulder to shoulder with Roth.

“I don’t think he knows,” I said.

“Knows what?” Roth asked quietly.

I looked at him. “I don’t think he knows how his father died. That Abbot was protecting me. He’s already so—”

“Stop.” Roth captured my chin, holding my gaze. “That guy that was just in here? I hate to say this out loud, but he’s a good guy. He doesn’t hate you. He never could. He might not like you right now, but that has nothing to do with his father. I don’t know if he knows how Abbot went down, but if or when he finds out, he’s not going to blame you. Because it wasn’t your fault. And he knows that.”

For a second I didn’t know what to say. “I hate it when you’re right.”

Roth chuckled as he wrapped his arm carefully around me and held me close to him. My cheek found its way to his shoulder. So much had happened in a span of days that my head constantly buzzed with all of it. But in this second, right now, my head was quiet.

“I wouldn’t have changed a thing.”

I blinked as I lifted my head. “What are you talking about?”

“The offer I had Cayman make to the witches.” He dragged his thumb under my lower lip. “Even if I’d known that they’d ask for Bambi, I still would’ve agreed if it meant saving you. I can only guess Zayne would feel the same about the way Abbot died.”

“Oh, Roth...”

“I just want you to know that. Okay?” He leaned over, kissing my forehead. “I miss that snake. I’m always going to miss her, but if I had to do it all over again, I would. No questions asked. I’d do it all over again for you.”

twenty-five

I REALLY WASN’T sure how Zayne and Stacey ended up in the backseat of the Mustang the following morning. Stacey had showed up first thing, moments after I’d stepped out of the shower, banging on the front door and demanding to be allowed in.

A huge part of me—okay, all of me—wished I’d been in the command room to see Geoff’s face when that went down. In all our time as friends, Stacey had never been allowed at the compound before.

From what I gathered, the Wardens had refused to allow her entrance until Zayne appeared. Turned out she’d learned of my now-minor injury through Zayne at some point the night before, because neither Roth nor I had been answering texts.

The fact that she and Zayne were texting in the first place was a huge surprise to me. I didn’t think they’d ever exchanged numbers before. Not that Stacey would’ve been against having Zayne’s number, but I wasn’t sure when the whole becoming text-buddies thing had happened.

Probably when I was in Hell.

Was that only yesterday? The day before? I couldn’t keep track of the time anymore.

Right now, she was supposed to be in class, not that I could really take her to task on that since I hadn’t stepped foot inside the school in what felt like forever.

Since Zayne had been in the room when Roth had suggested paying the seer a visit, he’d brought it up while Stacey was visiting me in my old room. She demanded to go with us, and after about a half an hour of arguing, I’d given up on trying to reason with her. I didn’t want her anywhere near any of this, not even the seer, but as she had pointed out more than once, she was already knee-deep in it.

It was also good to see her animated and active instead of a washed-out ghost version of the friend I loved.

I was surprised that Zayne had joined us. He was quiet, his expression stoic. I didn’t know how he was processing the grief of losing his father mere hours ago, but he was holding it together, and that strength was admirable.

When I’d seen Elijah die, I’d felt grief but it had been a different kind. With his death, I lost the potential of what could’ve been. Not that I ever fooled myself into thinking one day he would wake up and accept me as his daughter, but I’d mourned the loss...the loss of what never was. When Abbot died, I’d felt the loss of the only father figure I’d known, yet even though my grief was sharp, it was nothing compared to what Zayne must be feeling.

And my grief over Sam still didn’t reach the heights of what Stacey had experienced. It seemed, that through all of this, I was just getting a taste of the consequences of what was happening, not the whole swallow.

I had a feeling that would change, though, very soon.

The ride to the seer ’s house was awkward, because it started with a trip to the local grocery store.

The Perdue chicken was tucked between Zayne and Stacey. The former was shooting daggers at the back of Roth’s head anytime I glanced back at him. Roth was on his third round of humming

“Paradise City,” appearing oblivious to the death glare directed at him. I was trying to pretend like everything was dandy and totally not about seven levels of awkward, and Stacey looked like she needed a bucket of popcorn.

When we finally pulled up in front of the old home with its wooden fence and stone walls near the Manassas Battlefield, I was ready to dive-bomb out of the car.

“I think it’s best that you two stay in the car.” Roth turned off the ignition, and then twisted back, eyeing our tagalongs. “Tony is peculiar. We don’t need to piss him off.”

Zayne glanced at the chicken. “You have to bring him a chicken?”

“Eh...” Roth didn’t answer.

“He’s really a kid?” Stacey asked, glancing at the house. A curtain swayed across a window near the door. “Like a kid, kid?”

“Yeah, he’s probably only nine or ten,” I explained, reaching for the door.

“Geez,” murmured Stacey, slowly shaking her head.

“You two going to be okay here?” I hesitated.

Roth snorted. “I’m sure they’ll be just fine.”

I shot him a look, and he turned an innocent stare on me while he reached behind him. “Someone hand me the chicken?”

It was Stacey who handed it over. “This is so weird.”

“You have no idea,” I muttered.

Roth waited for me on the other side of the Mustang, lightly placing his hand on my lower back.

“You feeling okay?” he asked as we stepped through the gate and passed the neatly trimmed bushes.

“Just a little sore,” I admitted, because saying I was 100 percent fine wouldn’t be believable.

Dipping his head, he brushed his lips over my forehead before we climbed the stairs. I glanced back at the car and found that Zayne had not stayed inside as instructed. He was standing beside the car, his back to the house. He was right there, but looking at him felt like I was seeing a recorded image of someone. He was there but not.

The door opened before we knocked, drawing my attention. The faint blue aura faded, revealing Tony’s mother. She was wearing a white cardigan this time, but the pearls I remembered were still clasped around her neck.

“I’m still not happy to see you,” she said.

Roth raised a shoulder. “And I’d say I’m sorry, but I still wouldn’t mean it.”

Good Lord, not this again.

“Let them in,” came the voice from behind the woman.

She stepped aside and there he was. First I saw the white glow around him, brighter than what clung to Zayne. A pure soul, totally rare. The urge I usually felt at seeing a pure soul was minimal, almost forgettable. The boy was all blond curls and had the face of a cherub. He was adorable—with the exception of the white pupils in the middle of his cobalt eyes.

Because those eyes were still freaky.

Tony glanced at the grocery bag Roth held. “Another chicken? Are you serious?”

“Hey. I hear Perdue is the best,” Roth replied.

“And I hear Tyson is not that bad, either.” Sighing, the pint-size seer gestured at his mom. “Take it.”

The woman, who was probably well versed in the bizarreness, took the bag. “It’s Taco Tuesday.

This will have to wait.”

“You bet it will.” The seer motioned us to follow him. The house smelled of pine and apples, making me yearn for Christmas. “You know, you could’ve allowed your friends to come in. Instead they’re out there, being all broody and probably creeping out the neighbors.”

“They’re probably the least creepy thing your neighbors have seen,” Roth pointed out.

“Depends on what you think is creepy, eh?”

I smacked Roth’s arm when he opened his mouth, obviously forming yet another retort; if I didn’t stop him, he never would. He shot me a look, but Tony let out a very childlike giggle.

We followed him into the living room. There was a massive tree all decked out with ornaments with a mountain of presents already tucked under it. Another video game was paused on the TV, but this time it didn’t look like a medieval game. There was a car and what looked like a police officer chasing after it.

Tony plopped down on a beanbag, and somehow he made that look like a throne. “I know why you guys are here.”

“Of course,” I murmured, sitting down on the couch.

He raised a blond brow as he glanced at Roth. “Just so you know, when you ended up chained in the fiery pits, I wasn’t laughing like I predicted.”

Roth’s eyes narrowed at the reminder as he sat on the arm of the couch beside me.

“Maybe just a low chuckle of amusement,” Tony added slyly.

“Are you sure it wasn’t a high-pitched giggle of amusement?” replied Roth. “Since you haven’t hit puberty yet?”

Oh dear.

Tony lifted a chubby hand and flipped Roth off.

“Ah, did I upset the wee, little baby—”

“Roth,” I sighed, punching his leg lightly. “I can’t take you anywhere.”

“Not true.” He winked at me. “I’m adaptable in any situation.”

Tony propped his legs up on the coffee table, crossing them at the ankles. “While I think it’s great that you two have obviously come to terms with what you both are and your feelings for one another, I have better things to do than watch you two—”

“Tony!” his mom’s voice rang out from somewhere in the house. “Get your feet off the coffee table now!”

I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing as Tony rolled his weird eyes but did as he’d been told. His feet thumped off the hardwood floors. “You want to know how to kill the Lilin,” he said, staring balefully in Roth’s direction. “You know the rules. I cannot help one side over the other.”

“Screw the rules,” Roth ordered.

“Easy for you to say when it’s not your life that will be on the line,” the seer retorted. “The thing is, you both should already know the answer you seek.”

“We know how to kill the Lilin,” I said, scooting forward on the cushion. “Stab it in the heart or decapitate it, and we almost succeeded with a stab to the heart, but—”

“But you discovered a small complication?” He turned a woeful stare on his screen, as if spending a minute away from his game was torture. “A fatal wound to the Lilin delivers a fatal wound to you.”

I nodded.

“It’s expected. A part of you was used to create the Lilin, just as a part of Lilith was used to create both of you,” he continued, tilting his head to the side. Several blond curls flopped over. “All three of you are joined.”

That had been said before, but no one had mentioned the fact that killing the Lilin would also kill me. That little tidbit had been left out. Not that I was entirely surprised.

“We need to know how to separate the two.” Roth opened and closed the hand closest to me. “That’s why we’re here.”

“And I know that.” Tony barely dragged his attention from the paused game. “This conversation is wasting my time and yours.”

“Do you not care? I know your stupid game is important, but if we can’t stop the Lilin, you’re going to die. Everyone is going to die!” I shot to my feet, wanting to grab the little seer and shake him, but—but there was a part of me that understood he wasn’t being obtuse. We were the ones who were. Frustration pounded through me. “If we don’t succeed, the Lilin will jump-start the end of the world. Even you warned us of this last time we were here.”

“Last time you were here, I saw that there was a good chance for that to happen.” His pupils were at once a brilliant white. “Now I see that it will not happen. You will stop it.”

I tensed. “But—”

“You,” he repeated, eyeing me intently, “will stop it. And you already know how. The story is over.

The end.”

Roth sucked in a shrill breath, but I think I stopped breathing for a second. What none of us wanted to acknowledge in the hours after we’d gone toe-to-toe with the Lilin was now smacking us in the face again.

Killing the Lilin meant killing myself.

“You’re not helping us out here, bud.” Roth’s voice was calm, but anger and something else, something akin to desperation, were rolling off him, becoming a tangible entity in the room. “We need to know how to kill the Lilin without harming Layla.”

“And as I’ve said, you already know the answer to that,” Tony replied from his beanbag throne.

“You just don’t want to accept it.”

I closed my eyes briefly. “So what you’re saying is...vice versa. If we kill me, we kill the Lilin?”

“That’s bullshit,” Roth spat, and he was on his feet by the time I opened my eyes. “It’s an unacceptable answer.”

A look of remorse flickered across the young seer ’s face. “It’s the only answer.”

Roth started toward Tony, and I snapped my hand out, grabbing his arm. He breathed in deeply, his chest rising sharply. A second later, Tony’s mother was in the room.

She held a casserole dish above her head, as if she was ready to pitch it at one of us. “I think it’s time for you all to leave.”

My grip tightened on Roth’s arm. She was right. It was time to go, because we knew what the answer was. We’d known what it was before we’d even come here, or at least I had. Roth was still mad eyeballing the seer, so I tugged on his arm.

“Roth,” I whispered. “Let’s go.”

He turned a sharp glare on me. “You’re just going to accept that?” He threw an arm up toward Tony. “That there’s no other way?”

“No,” I said, and it wasn’t so much a lie as it was an attempt to end this before we ended up wearing green-bean casserole. “But we’re done here.” When he still hesitated, I pulled on his arm again.

“We’ll figure this out on our own.”

My words sounded weak to my own ears, but Roth finally relented. We started toward the front hallway, passing Tony’s stern mother.

“Everything is for a reason,” the seer called as we neared the archway to the foyer, and when I looked back, he was standing, his expression solemn and wise beyond his years. “Not one thing in this world happens without a purpose. Everyone’s actions—those of the Prince and of your Wardens—

have all been leading up to this. They’ve all sacrificed for you, for this. And it will not be in vain.”

* * *

Stacey’s face was the color of a piece of notebook paper and her dark eyes were wide. “No,” she said, and then louder, “No.”

Twisting around in the front passenger seat, I glanced at Roth. At his hands. His knuckles were bleached white from gripping the steering wheel. He hadn’t said much since we’d returned to the Mustang. He stared straight ahead, a muscle ticking along his jaw as he drove us back to drop Stacey off at the high school.

“Is there literally nothing that can be done?” Zayne asked, his hands resting on the back of my seat.

“Or is it just that the seer doesn’t know what it will take?”

“I don’t think there is a way,” I replied, flicking my gaze back to Zayne. He didn’t look just angry or confused, but more like a combination of the two. “It makes sense in a way, the fact that it’s connected to me and both of us are connected to Lilith. Our blood created the Lilin.”

“Maybe it makes sense to you,” Stacey said, pulling one leg up and tucking it against her chest.

“None of any of this crap really makes sense to me, but whatever. What are we going to do now? If we can’t kill the Lilin...”

“If we don’t kill the Lilin, we lose Sam. We lose all those souls that the Lilin has taken,” I reminded her.

Her face contorted as she looked away, staring out the window as the lawns and homes gave way to walls. “I haven’t forgotten that. I just...”

Zayne leaned back in his seat, rubbing his hands down his face. “There’s got to be something.

There’s so many damn books in my...my father ’s study. I’ll check them when I get back. I’ll get Dez on it, too.” Lowering his hands, he sighed heavily. “We’re not giving up.”

The fact that Zayne still cared enough about me to want to help eased a little of the burden I carried with me from hurting him so terribly. Then again, I shouldn’t be all that surprised. There was probably a part of him that hated me, understandably so, but under it all, he was a good guy—a great guy.

“Did you hear me?” Zayne asked, drawing my gaze back to him. “We’re not giving up.”

“I know, but...but we’re running out of time for Sam. And how much longer are the Alphas going to allow this violence to continue?” I was asking damn good questions. Ones that neither Zayne nor Roth could answer. “The Lilin took out an entire congregation of God’s Children. And yeah, I’m sure they weren’t on the big guy’s favorite list, but it’s only a matter of time before the Lilin does something that can no longer be overlooked. It almost exposed all of us when it woke those gargoyles. How much time do we really have to figure out a way around this?”

“What are you saying?” Roth, finally speaking, barked out the question.

Startled, I looked at him. His eyes were trained on the road. “I don’t know. Just that we...we don’t have any time.”

Roth lapsed back into silence, and then we were pulling up in front of the high school. Seeing it, after what felt like forever, triggered a mixed response inside me. Part nostalgia and part keen disappointment—I wasn’t able to forget how much I’d looked forward to getting up every morning and going to school. Within those walls, I used to be able to pretend that I was normal. Looking back now, I saw how foolish that was, that childish urge to hide from what I was.

It wasn’t something I could do anymore.

Stacey grabbed her backpack off the floor of the Mustang and climbed out. I followed, so that I could give her a quick hug. We couldn’t linger, though. If any of the school officials saw me outside, that would raise a slew of unwanted questions we didn’t have time for.

“You okay?” I asked when I pulled back from the hug.

Nodding, she brushed her overly long bangs out of her eyes. “Yes. No.” She hitched up the strap of the bag farther up her shoulder. “Why are you even asking if I’m okay? You’re the one who’s virtually a Siamese twin with a psychotic demon. Don’t worry about me right now.”

“It’s kind of hard not to.”

“Or is it just easier to worry about me instead of yourself?”

I opened my mouth, but what could I say to that? It was boldly on point. Glancing at the thick clouds, I sighed. “I don’t know what to think right now. I...” I trailed off, shaking my head.

Stacey reached out, grasping the sleeve of my sweater and tugging gently. “You know you’re the sister I never really asked for, right?”

I grinned. “Yeah.”

“And I love you, no matter what. You know that also. And you know how much it...it killed me to lose Sam.” Tears filled her eyes, but her gaze was steady. “I can’t lose you, too.”

Her statement unnerved me. “Why do you think that’s going to happen?”

“Because I know you,” she replied, her voice hoarse. “Promise me you’re not going to do anything stupid.”

“Me?” I forced a laugh that sounded like dry bones rattling. “Not do something stupid?”

The joke did nothing to ease her mind. “You know what I mean. Promise me, Layla. I want to hear you promise me.”

“I promise,” I whispered.

As I parted ways with Stacey, I knew that my promise had done very little to reassure her. Truth was, the promise was one I never should’ve made. Because I had a lot of stupid left in me, and I knew what I had to do.

twenty-six

ROTH AND I helped Zayne and Dez skim through the ancient tomes that filled the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves in Abbot’s study well into the evening. We were even joined by Danika and Nicolai once night fell. As we went from one dusty page to the next, I could hear the high-pitched giggles from Izzy and the shrill cries from Drake on and off all evening—clearly Jasmine was having a tough time wearing them out enough to get them to bed. By the time we called it a night, I hadn’t actually seen the twins and we hadn’t found anything of use.

Except I did come across a small creature called a Pukwudgie in one of the tomes, a tiny troll-like creature I’d heard about only once before, when Dez had brought Jasmine to our compound all those years ago. She’d been bitten by one and had been very ill as a result.

I still sort of wanted to see one with my own eyes.

Snow was falling by the time Roth and I left. We headed to the Palisades since it was closer than the McMansion, parking in the garage and bypassing the club down below. As soon as I walked into the loft, he called off the kittens. I watched them scatter about the room. One headed to the piano while the other two darted under the bed.

“Want me to get some food?” he asked, dropping his keys atop the bookshelf.

I wasn’t really hungry, but I knew Roth hadn’t eaten all day. “Sure.”

“I’ll go grab us some stuff,” he said, instead of summoning Cayman like he normally would.

“Anything in particular you want?”

Pressing my lips together, I shook my head and watched Roth start toward the door, stop as if he wanted to say something and then leave. Unease churned in my stomach. Asking about food was the most he’d said since we left the seer ’s house. Suspicion blossomed. What was he up to?

What was I up to?

Restless, I looked around the room, and then called for Robin. He peeled off my arm, a fox-shaped shadow until he hit the floor. There, his reddish-orange fur was twitching as he looked back at me, head cocked to the side.

He knew.

Of course he did.

Chirping, he pranced over to the open closet door, to the clothing he’d dragged off hangers and had fashioned a bed out of. I watched him curl his bushy tail close to his body, and then I walked to the roof entrance.

Cold air greeted me as I opened the door and climbed the narrow staircase. A fine layer of snow coated the empty pots and the canopy above the chaise rolled silently. All the trees were bare, but not dead. Life would be renewed in the spring, if mankind made it to the spring.

I made my way to the ledge and stared at the glistening lights of DC. A misty cloud formed every time I exhaled, but it was pleasant out here, above the noise of the city and the noxious fumes. Calm even. We were a handful of days away from Christmas, and we were running out of time.

We were out of time actually.

Although Zayne and Dez had planned to continue scouring the books for a way to end the Lilin or somehow incapacitate it, I doubted they would find anything. Besides, even if we could disable the Lilin, that did nothing for the souls it had consumed, nothing for Sam.

I took a deep breath, but it got stuck in my throat as a razor-edged panic rose like a ghost in the night, threatening to drag me under. Before I could give in to it, I felt Roth’s presence. Swallowing hard, I pushed the fear down, all the way down, and faced him.