Текст книги "Always Enough"

Автор книги: Stacy Borel

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Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 10 страниц)

“Again, Harper, you’ll give me another one.”

Kyler growled into my ear, as his fabulously large cock drove into me again. He’d brought me to orgasm twice already, but he was demanding another. My body was shaking from the sheer exertion of it all, yet I couldn’t help but respond to his demand.

He hovered over me, his arms bulging from holding his weight up, looking down at me with appraising eyes. A glimmer of mischief showed itself and he gave me a devilish smile.

“You said … you … loved me … and now … I want … another … one.” He paused, causing a whimper to escape me. “I’ll force it out of you, Harper.”

With that, he started to pound into me over and over again, and I felt the familiar build of my impending orgasm. He bent down to rest on his forearms and, maintaining his pace, kissed me thoroughly. Just as he nipped my lower lip, I started to come. It was powerful and intense. Ky thrust several more times before he yelled out my name and collapsed on top of me. I could feel him still pulsing inside of me and I never wanted the feeling to end. I lay there, rubbing my fingertips up and down his back, delighting in our post-coital cuddling. It was something I’d never really done before. Even when I was with Ky, I always pushed him away and went to get cleaned up. But now? Now, I welcomed it.

I let out a little giggle, which actually hurt my overworked abs.

“What’s so funny?” His voice was muffled, probably because he was face-down on the pillow.

“Oh, just that this seems so, I don’t know … domestic?”

“Well, when you get a chance, please roll me off you because I’m certain I won’t be able to move anytime soon. I’m mush.”

I slapped his arm and, even though I didn’t want him to move from where he was, I gave him a slight shove. He was still inside me and I liked knowing that we were still connected. Ky moved over a few inches, which allowed me the space to scoot out from under him. He rolled over to his back, giving me a full view of the abs I loved so much.

Moving my fingers along each and every muscle, my mind wandered to a place that I didn’t want it to go. I’d told him that I loved him, which opened me up to the possibility of getting hurt. He must have seen the seriousness on my face because he took hold of my hand and pulled me close to him. I rolled in and he tucked me into his chest so I could rest my head on him.

“Stop thinking so hard, Harper. We’re good,” he said, trying to reassure me.

“I’m just wondering what happens when I leave here in a few days, and we both go back to our normal everyday lives. Then what? Do we just forget this ever happened?”

He raised his head to look at me.

“Of course we don’t forget this happened. We’ll do exactly what I told you we’d do before I left for the tour. We’ll talk on the phone, text, email, Skype, or do whatever we can to make sure we’re still good. Distance doesn’t have to mean the end, Harper. I know I’m going to miss seeing your beautiful face and that smart mouth, but the space between us doesn’t mean shit to me. You’re my girl, always have been.” His large hands cupped my face.

He said everything so matter of fact that it melted my heart. Since I opened up to him and the possibilities that this could bring, I had to be willing to give this a wholehearted shot—I owed it to both of us. But I had to open up and let him know about my fears, just like Em had said. We wouldn’t work if I didn’t at least give him the chance to see what was going on inside my head.

“You’re right. I’m sorry I questioned it.”

“Anytime you feel the need to say I’m right, I’m more than happy to listen,” he chuckled.

I laughed and slapped him on the stomach. “Shut up.”

“Hey,” I said, “do you remember that time when you came to my house after the photo incident?”

He tensed. “I’ll never forget it.”

“I was just thinking about that. I think that was the first time I’d ever let anybody see that side of me. I think I knew then that I could trust you.”

I sat up and rested my chin on the top of my hand. I looked at him, and reveled in the fact that this gorgeous man was mine.

“You can always trust me, Harper. I’d never intentionally do anything to break that trust. You know that, right?”

I nodded, and lay my head back on his chest, thinking back all those years ago …

There was a knock on my door. I didn’t want to answer it, and I was half tempted not to. I’d already told Em on the phone that I wasn’t up for company, and I definitely didn’t want to talk about what happened. The knock came again, and I felt like a jerk for not answering.

“Look Em, I told you I didn’t want comp …” Getting up to answer the door, I trailed off because Em wasn’t the one standing there when I opened the door. It was Kyler Lewis.

“Hey, Harper, I thought I’d stop by and see how you’re doing,” he said from the other side of the door.

I stood there, shocked. Not just because it wasn’t Em, but also because Ky was the last person I’d ever expect to stop by and check on me. We’d had had a strange relationship since we were kids—always picking on each other, teasing, harping, jabbing anytime we saw an opportunity. We weren’t necessarily enemies, but we certainly weren’t friends either. I’d only just recently started getting to know him because Em had started dating Finn. I’d actually found out was that Ky was pretty funny, and more sensitive than I’d pegged him to be.

I reached down and tugged at my shirt. I probably looked like a big mess. “I’m fine.”

“Yeah, you really look fine, Harper.” He was being sarcastic. “Look, can I come in?”

I figured I might as well get it over with. Maybe if I talked to Ky about what had happened, I’d be able to deal with the other kids at school … whenever I decided to go back. I shrugged my shoulders and stepped to the side to let him by.

Ky came inside and looked around. Besides Emilyn, I’d never had anyone from school inside my house and to be honest, it was a little intimidating. I didn’t have much. It was still just my mom and I, and she worked a lot. The house was somewhat bare but we had everything we needed. As he checked everything out, I tried not to be embarrassed by the lack of ‘things.’ Ky’s parents had money, and I’m sure he didn’t normally hang out on my side of town.

Crossing my arms over my chest protectively I asked, “So what are you doing here, Ky?”

He stopped his perusal and his eyes landed on mine. “You haven’t been at school for a few days and I wanted to know why.”

We’d barely spoken and I was already exhausted. I plopped down on the faded, green couch that sat in the center of the living room.

“You know why,” I said, looking down at the floor.

“I suppose I do, but I want to know why you’re letting Aubrey get the better of you?”

My eyes shot to his and I glared at him. “She embarrassed me in front of the entire school, Kyler! She sent that photo to everyone and now our whole class has seen me … naked.” I looked down again, unable to deal with my embarrassment.

“You’re letting Aubrey win, you know that, right?”

“You know what, Ky? You can get out of my house. I don’t need to be lectured by you or anybody else. Just get out!”

I got up and fled the living room. My bedroom was down the hall and as soon as I was inside, I slammed my door shut and locked it. Seconds later I heard a light tapping.

“Harper, let me in.”

“Go away, Ky.” I started to cry.

It was quiet, but then he said so softly, “Harper, please, I just want to talk to you.”

I sniffed and decided that the jerk wasn’t going to leave until I pacified him. I unlocked the door, but left it closed, before moving to the bed. Ky opened the door and came in to sit down on the bed beside me. Tears streamed down my face and I hated that he was seeing me like this. I didn’t let anybody see me cry … ever.

“Would you like me to tell what’s been happening at school? I think you’ll be surprised,” he said.

“Let me guess, the photo has been passed around to even more people, and now it’s hitting the next town.”

“Nope. Let’s just say the photo has been taken care of.”

“What do you mean it’s ‘been taken care of, Ky?” I sneered.

“I took care of it. That’s all you need to know.”

“I don’t understand. How did you take care of it?”

He smiled a soft sweet smile at me, and reached up to brush away a tear with his thumb. “Like I said, don’t worry about it. You can come back to school and I promise you, nobody will say anything about it.” The smile faded slightly from his face when he said, “But if they do, let me know and I’ll handle it.”

More tears streamed down my face. “Why are you being so nice to me, Kyler? We’re not friends.”

I know that sounded rude and mean, but it was also the truth.

“We are friends … at least we are now. And I like you, Harper, I always have. I don’t want you to cry any more tears over this.”

He liked me? Well, that was a revelation.

“You like me, huh?” I gave him a slight smile.

“Yep.”

Ky leaned over and kissed my cheek, which caused me to blush.

“That pink on your cheeks looks good on you.”

I didn’t normally blush, but I couldn’t help the heat that crept up to my face. I looked up at him and there must have been something he saw on my face that made him lean over again and softly kiss my lips. He was being so gentle and tentative at first. But when my tongue snaked out and lightly touched his lower lip, he became more aggressive. Ky’s mouth became firmer, and his hands came up to hold me by the back of my neck.

I pulled my mouth back and inch. “Wait, Ky, what are we doing here?”

His eyes roamed over my face and then he brought his stare back to me. “I don’t really know, Harper. I just know that that felt really good, and I don’t know if I can stop it from happening again.”

Kyler gave me a cocky grin and crushed his lips to mine. He tasted every inch of my mouth and I felt my body tingling down there. His hand slid gently down and grazed the small patch of skin between my shirt and jeans. My heart started pounding in my chest. I wasn’t sure where this was going, only that I wanted it. He was making me feel wanted. However, that feeling was abruptly halted when Ky’s hand had moved up and delicately touched the underside of my breast.

I jerked back and starred at him.

“I’m sorry Harper, I got carried away.”

Shaking my head back and forth I said, “Ky, it’s okay, I just … I haven’t … I’ve never …” I trailed off, not sure of the right words to say.

“Are you saying that you’re a virgin, Harper?” There was no teasing in his voice, he was simply asking me a question.

I shrugged my shoulders, not wanting to directly answer him.

He tipped my chin up with his fingers so that I was looking at him. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. There’s no pressure here, okay?”

He meant it. The normally cocky, smart ass, everything is a joke Kyler, was being kind and I didn’t know how to take it. I searched his face for any signs of him playing the ‘nice guy’ card just so he could get laid. I saw nothing but sincerity. He actually meant what he said. This guy came here to make me feel better, and then confessed that he’d liked me for a while now. I made the decision right then and there that I was going to be brave. I wanted this to happen.

“Touch me, Ky,” I barely whispered.

That day I gave Kyler something that was special. He never made me regret my decision that I lost my virginity to him. He also never told me how it was that he got the whole school to keep quiet. I went to school the following morning and not one person said anything about the photo Aubrey had taken. I’d wanted to ask people why they never brought it up, but didn’t want to remind them about it either.

“So can I ask you something?” I said, tickling the side of his ribs.

“Hmmm …”

“How did you get them all to stop talking about it, and spreading the picture?”

He laughed. “You never found out?”

“No. I asked Em if she knew, but she said she had no idea, and Finn wasn’t saying a word.”

“For starters, I went up to Aubrey and flirted a bit with her. I made her think that I wanted to go out with her, and then I asked some questions about the photo. She ended up admitting to me that she took it when you reached down to grab some soap, and she’d made a noise so you would look over at her. After that, I asked to see the photo—”

“Oh my God, you didn’t look at it, did you?” I interrupted him.

“Will you let me finish? No, I didn’t look at it. I took her phone, threw it on the ground, then shattered it with my foot. She started yelling at me and telling me that I was going to pay for it, but then I conveniently pointed out that I had Finn over in the corner recording everything that she’d said. Everyone would know that she was a liar.”

“So that’s why Finn never told Em anything,” I giggled. “But that doesn’t explain why people acted like it never happened. Did you show everyone the video or something?”

He brought his hand up and brushed it through the thick strands of my hair.

“No, if I would have done that, it would have made me as bad as her. I just found every single person that had gotten their hands on the photo, and told them that if one word was spoken about it again, they’d have me to deal with.”

“Such a badass.”

I tried to brush off the gravity of what he’d done for me. He’d taken care of something that, at the time, had felt crushing. He’d cleaned up the mess, and then kept it quiet. That meant a lot to me.

“Ky, all these years, and I never even knew you were the reason the rumors had stopped.”

He shrugged. “I suppose so.”

I sat up and straddled him and laid my head on his chest, while my arms squeezed his sides. My eyes started to water.

“Thank you. Just … thank you … for being there for me.”

He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. It was his silent, “you’re welcome”.

We ended up falling asleep like that for several hours, and I was the happiest I’d ever been.

My time with Harper went by way too quickly. The days after the birthday party incident were so amazing, I still couldn’t wrap my mind around the fact that Harper had said she loved me. I was sure that some might have thought I was a complete dickhead for not saying it back to her, but I didn’t just want her to hear it … I wanted her to feel it. Also, I didn’t want to say it just because she’d said it to me. And I did, I loved her very much. There was no other woman out there for me, and it was something I’d always known. But I also wanted to make sure that she trusted me too.

Harper may be the most beautiful person I’d ever seen on the outside, but she was also extremely insecure. It was the only flaw I’d found in her and still, it was something I found endearing. Everything else about her drove me mad. If you set aside her looks, she had so much drive and determination to succeed, and I’d never seen that in another person before. She was stubborn as a mule, and shit if that didn’t chap my ass, but it was also a massive turn on to spar with her … after all, who didn’t love make-up sex? And her heart … her fucking heart was made of gold. All of these qualities made her amazing to me, but that damn insecurity of hers …

I had a feeling it had everything to do with her dad leaving her when she was young, but she hadn’t talked to me about it.

When I’d dropped her off at the airport to catch a late morning flight, it had taken everything in me not to say “fuck the tour,” and go home with her. But I’d made this commitment and I wouldn’t leave the band like that. If what Harper and I had was real, then we would make it through the distance, and end up on the other side happy … and together. I only had one more month left anyway, with a dozen cities to perform in, the last one being in Boise—my hometown. I’d head home from there, check on my dad, and spend some time with Harper. We could figure out where we’d go from there.

My cell beeped, alerting me to a text.

Harper: Hey! Made it back. Remind me 2 always fly 1 st class.

Me: lol enjoyed it huh?

Harper: Think I got drunk on the small bottles of wine.

Me: U would. U driving home?

Several minutes passed but I didn’t receive a text back. I had to l laugh at my girl boozing it up in first class, but I also hoped she hadn’t got too sloshed. I started to get worried when I didn’t hear from her. Hoping she was just at the baggage claim and couldn’t text me back, I shot her a quick message asking her to call me when she was able.

In the meantime, I kept myself busy with packing. Boston was going to be loads of fun. We would only be in Beantown for a day, before we moved on to the next destination. I concluded that there was no better way to see the US than going on a band tour.

My cell was sitting on the nightstand when it started ringing Cyndi Lauper’s “Girls Just Want To Have Fun”. I chuckled when I looked at the screen and saw Harper’s name.

“Clever girl, stealing my tricks?”

I could hear her smile through the phone. “I’ll never tell you my secrets. Like the song?”

“I suppose. But you like eighties hair bands and a whiny chick’s voice. Any relevance?”

“Girls just want to have fun.” I pictured her shrugging her shoulders.

“Alright, very funny,” I chuckled. “Now tell me, are you driving yourself home?”

She was quiet, and I knew right then that I hadn’t received a text back from her for a reason. It made me nervous.

“Harper?”

“I’m still here. No, I’m not driving.”

I shook my head. “I hope you didn’t take a cab all the way home from the airport. That’s going to cost you a fortune.”

“No, I uh … I got a ride,” she said.

Then I knew … the tone in her voice, the way it shook when she spoke. I swallowed down the anger that was already building.

“If you didn’t take a cab, who did you get a ride from? Boise is an hour away.”

I heard someone clear their throat, then I heard a man ask Harper if she wanted something to eat. I dropped my head and sat my ass down on the bed, hard. My elbows rested on my knees and I ran a hand through my hair.

“Who was that, Harper?”

“It’s Michael. I called him to pick me up because I had too much to drink while I was on the plane. Flying makes me nervous, you know that.”

“I understand that part, but why didn’t you call me?”

“Seriously, Ky? And you could have what, come to pick me up?”

“I could have sent a car for you. Don’t be such a smart ass.”

She took a deep breath and spoke again. “I did what I thought was best, okay? Just remember what we talked about the other day. I’m still your girl.”

I did remember, and that made me feel better to hear her say it. Plus it gave me some perverse satisfaction that she’d said it in front of Michael. Take that, dick-fluffer. I shook my head to clear the anger.

“Okay. Just … call me when you get home, alright?”

“I will. Promise.”

We hung up the phone and I sat there for I don’t know how long. My mind went over every possibility that it could come up with. Was Michael talking to her about me? Was he trying to prove that he was a better man? I didn’t know. The not knowing was making me crazy. I was jealous, just like she had been.

“Fuck!” I shouted and threw my phone across the room.

Boy, that hadn’t gone well. I hadn’t planned on telling Ky that Michael was driving me home. Well, at least not until I was home and I could tell him without Michael right next to me. I could tell that he was pissed off and wanted to yell at me. It was probably a good thing that Ky wasn’t there because I had no doubt he would have hit Michael out of sheer anger.

Still in the car, and not wanting to make a big deal out of the conversation I’d just had in front of him, I turned toward Michael and gave him a small smile.

“Do you mind stopping at the burger stand outside of Mountain Home? Food will probably help the buzz.”

I was certain that whatever buzz I’d had was now officially gone after that phone call. I was anxious to get home so I could call him without someone else listening. I needed to explain to him that I hadn’t sought Michael out.

“No problem. Do you want your usual?”

I looked over at him. “How do you know what my usual is?”

Michael grinned. “I pay attention, Harper. You’ve always gotten a quarter pound hamburger, no mayo, add ketchup, extra bacon, and extra pickles. You like their homemade fries, but no salt. And you always get an extra large chocolate milkshake, although, I don’t know where you put all that food.”

Wow. I’d never realized that Michael had noticed such small details about me. If I hadn’t been so concerned about the phone call I had to make when I got home, or the fact that I was in love with someone else, I would probably have been flattered.

“I’m impressed. You either really do pay attention, or you’re a stalker and watch my every move.” I tried joking to make myself feel better.

He laughed, thankfully not noticing my mood. “Maybe a little bit of both.” He waggled both eyebrows at me.

We went through the drive thru and Michael got my food. I sat quietly, picking at my nails– a nervous habit. When we pulled into my driveway, Michael put the car into park, and I hoped he wouldn’t want to come in. Thankfully, he just turned in his seat and looked at me.

“So you and Lewis are an item now, huh?”

I guess the truth was what he deserved, even though Michael and I were never really ‘together.’

“Yeah.”

He lowered his head. “Are you happy?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you love him?”

I closed my eyes tight. I hadn’t realized until this very moment that Michael had been trying to ease us into something more than just friends and sometimes sex buddies.

“Yeah.”

He nodded. “He’s a lucky man. You’ll still call … you know, if you need anything?”

“Of course, this doesn’t change anything. You’ll always be my friend.”

With nothing else to say, I got out of his car, took my suitcase out of the back, and walked inside my house. I wasn’t even hungry anymore. It was early evening and I was exhausted. I knew Ky wanted me to call as soon as I got home, but I needed a little bit of time to rest … to collect myself. I needed a freaking nap!

Leaving my suitcase at the front door, I went to the couch and collapsed. It wasn’t that I had gotten myself into a situation that I couldn’t explain, it was that I didn’t think I needed to explain myself to Ky. And I hadn’t seen the emotion from Michael coming. It looked like that’d been taken care of now, though. I closed my eyes and allowed my coiled up muscles to relax. It didn’t take long for me to drift off to sleep.

I had no idea how long I’d been asleep, but when I woke my living room was dark. I got up and turned on the lamp on one of the end tables. The clock that hung over the top of the TV read ten o’clock. Oh my God, seriously? I’d slept for over five hours! I rubbed my eyes, trying to shake off the tiredness. Then it hit me. I hadn’t called Kyler. Fuck.

I ran over to my purse and dug around until I found my phone. Christ, over twenty missed calls and fifteen text messages. I quickly dialed his number and it only rang once before he answered, sounding totally frazzled.

“Harper? Where are you?”

“I’m here, I’m at home.”

“When did you get home and why didn’t you call me? I’ve been out of my mind worrying.”

I sighed. “I know and I’m sorry. I was just so tired when I got in, that I laid down on the couch and fell asleep. Next thing I knew, I woke up and it was dark.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay.” I said, confused.

I heard him curse under his breath. “Do you have any idea how close I was to jumping on a plane and coming to you? I even called Michael to see if he’d dropped you off.”

“You called Michael?”

“Yeah, I called him, and believe me, it wasn’t a call I cared to make, but I had no idea where you were. When you say that you’ll call me, I expect you to call me. Fuck, I swear you just took ten years off my life.” I could hear Ky exhale over the phone.

He needed to know that he had nothing to worry about. But I was a little angry that he was being so melodramatic.

“I’m sorry you had to call him. You shouldn’t have, but I know why you did.” And I truly did, but that didn’t change the fact that he’d overreacted. “I think I need to explain though. Yes, I was with Michael, but I want you to know that I didn’t go seeking him out. I was waiting at baggage claim when he called me. He said he was in Boise for a meeting and wanted to know when I was getting in so he could drive me home. I had planned on getting a taxi and sucking up the cost, but I figured it couldn’t hurt to have Michael drive me. Then you called.”

The other end was silent for a few short beats. “You can’t be that blind, Harper. You realize that he knew the day you were coming in, and he went to Boise to wait so he could drive you.” Ky was pissed.

“Give me a break. He had business.”

“Open your eyes!” He practically shouted. “You just spent a week with me, and now he’s trying to make sure he gets you back. He wants you, Harper. And I have to ask … do you want to be with him?”

“You asshat!” I yelled into the phone. “I told you I loved you and you’re asking me if I want to be with him? Did this week mean nothing to you?”

“This week meant everything to me. That’s why I had to ask.”

“Well, who’s blind now?” I threw back his words. “Turns out Michael did want something more from me, but I explained to him that I was in love with you. I … love … you,” I said slowly. “I’m not interested in him. I never will be.”

My chest was rising and falling and I was practically panting with anger. What the hell was his problem? Even if I had caught a ride with Michael, I was pretty sure that I’d made my feelings crystal clear. Granted, I’d left out the baggage about my dad, but I didn’t think that was something that needed to be brought up in the midst of me practically throwing myself at him. I’d talk to him about that when he was done with the tour, which I really wished was over. Not so I could throw myself in his arms, but so I could twist his nuts and tattoo ‘asshat’ on his forehead. God, men could be so dense sometimes.

I heard him breathe in through his nose. “Did anything else happen that I should be aware of?”

Was this guy for real?

“Seriously, Kyler? If there was more to this story, don’t you think I’d tell you? Jesus, you sure do know how to fire me up, don’t you? And since when do you play the ‘jealous boyfriend’ role? I’m not the one out touring every city in the fucking United States, and partying after every show.”

“Yeah, well, I also haven’t slept with any of the women that have come on to me either. Therein lies the difference between you and me.”

That was it—I’d reached my breaking point. I hung up on him and shut my phone off. Of all the times that Ky had been a douche to me, from high school up until now, that took the motherfucking cake. Frustrated and pissed off, I got up, went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of wine. I grabbed the cork with my teeth, spat it across the room, tipped the mouth of the bottle up to my lips, and chugged. After I’d swallowed about four mouthfuls of the rich merlot, I set the bottle down. I was seething.

“Fuck you, Kyler Lewis,” I screamed as loud as I could, even though nobody could hear me.

Wasn’t this just my luck? I’d kept myself closed off for years, then I go and fall for the one man that could take me from zero to pissed off in less than a second.

Awesome.