Текст книги "Fast Forward"

Автор книги: Marion Croslydon

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Текущая страница: 8 (всего у книги 14 страниц)

CHAPTER 16

Josh

“Maybe it’s too much like a field trip?”

Cassie rolled her eyes at me. “Come on, Champ! He loves it.” She slapped my arm playfully. “You can’t always pull the sports card, you know.”

Lucas had landed in D.C. yesterday. We’d been lucky. The adoption had been approved last week and the boy was already with us for a pre-placement visit. The fact that Sharon Sorenson had last-minute plans for Thanksgiving had helped. That meant she was more than happy to send him away. That meant we had two full days together.

I’d been in charge of organizing our first day out as a family-to-be. Saying that it’d kept me awake at night was an understatement. I’d finally set my choice on George Washington’s Mount Vernon. My dad had taken me there during our Memorial Day weekend in D.C. years ago. I’d loved it. But I was a bit of a nerd as a kid—I still was—and maybe Lucas didn’t care about history, Founding Fathers or not.

However, I was pretty sure he’d loved the cruise we’d taken out of D.C. The river and the boat itself fascinated him. We’d shared stories of pirates and buccaneers. I think he’d confused the Potomac with the Caribbean.

“Josh, come, come!” Lucas kept whooping his arm to get me to his side. He was standing on tip-toes to see into one of the glass displays in the museum. “Look at all those soldiers. They’re dressed all funny, not like the Avengers.”

The miniature guys fighting at the Battle of Yorktown couldn’t really compare to the buffed-up action figures Lucas played with. I felt Cassie by my side. She leaned against me while checking out the reproduction in the glass display.

“Josh, what are they fighting for?”

This seemingly simple question struck at the geeky nerd inside of me. I bent over and took Lucas in my arms so that he could get a better view. He was stuffed inside a ski jacket that could protect him against the elements on a trip to the North Pole. One of his arms looped around my neck.

“The guys in blue are fighting for the man who owned the house we’re visiting today.”

“George like-the-town-where-you-and-Cassie-live?”

“Correct. George Washington.”

Cassie chuckled. While one of my arms was wrapped around Lucas, the other one pulled her against me. I loved the way they smelled. Cassie always made me think of a field of wild daisies. Today it mingled with Lucas’s sugary apple scent.

Nothing had ever smelled as good as this.

“George Washington was an American, like us. He wanted America to be free. But the English didn’t want us to be. So there was a war.”

“Who are the English?”

“They’re the guys in red.”

Lucas pondered my answer while he kept looking at the reproduction of Yorktown. “My mommy didn’t like me playing with my Iron Man. She said that people should talk to each other, not fight.”

“Your mommy was right.” Cassie gently laid her hand on Lucas’s cheek, her thumb brushing his plump skin. “Hey, Champ, should we get a nice, big cup of hot chocolate?”

“Yes please!” burst from Lucas and me simultaneously. We were both Cassie’s ‘Champ’ and I was happy to share the title for the rest of my life, if it meant keeping the boy—and Cassie—with me. Forever.

I was finding out that, with a kid, it takes much longer to go from A to B. Before making it to the coffee shop, we stopped at the smokehouse, the coach house, the stables and, most amazingly of all, the blacksmith shop, meaning we reached our destination half an hour later than planned.

“Why don’t you go and choose a slice of cake? They look yummy.” I was looking forward to mine.

Lucas got down from his seat and hurried toward some fairly substantial pies that were on display.

“I’m sure we’re supposed to keep him away from sugar and fat.” Cassie removed her coat and hung it at the back of her chair. Her hair was a blond mess after the ride on the upper deck of the Spirit of Mount Vernon and running after Lucas. The boy didn’t walk, he ran everywhere.

“I guess this means we’re real parents now. Doing what we’re not supposed to do, feeling guilty about it, but doing it anyway.”

Cassie gave me the cutest frown. I wanted to reach over the table and smother her with the longest kiss this side of the Mississippi. I didn’t because, after six months of abstinence, I wasn’t allowing myself to get even close to being tempted.

“Don’t look at me like that, Josh, or I’m going to combust.” She coughed while two pink circles formed on her cheeks.

I let out a heavy breath. “I didn’t think I was that obvious.”

Lucas was back at our side so I shot the inappropriate thoughts dead.

“Cassie, can I have some pecan pie, please?”

Cassie gave Lucas a suspicious stare. I was missing something. “What are you hiding?” she asked.

Lucas had become all twitchy, his eyes evading mine.

“Well, Champ, what’s up?” Cassie repeated as she gave him a gentle nudge.

“It’s just that my mom didn’t let me have pecan pie. But I had some once with Andrea and it tasted really good.”

Cassie sent me a sideway glance. She was silently asking for some advice but I had no idea what to say.

“Do you know why your mom didn’t let you have pecan pie?”

“Because of the pieces of pecan that could get stuck in my teeth. They would put holes in them and I’d have to see the tooth doctor and it’d hurt.”

I thought a good brush of his teeth would get rid of any nasty chunks of pecan, but there was more at stake than pecan pie. Lucas and I waited for Cassie to make the decision.

“Your mommy was right, Lucas. So maybe we should stay clear of the pecan pie for now. At least until you get brand new teeth.”

“When am I going to get new teeth?”

“Well…” I knew Cassie was trying to remember all about milk teeth.

“When you’re six or so,” I chimed in. Lucas grimaced. “Is it going to hurt?”

“Not really, and the tooth fairy might come and visit you and leave a coin under your pillow for each tooth you lose.”

“And with my new teeth I can eat pecan pie?” I’d gotten Lucas pretty excited about this goddam pie.

“Yes, you can—“

“—as well as more broccoli, carrots and sweet potato,” Cassie cut in.

“Oh… okay.” New teeth had suddenly lost some of their appeal. “I’m going to get something else then.”

“That’s a good idea.”

There he was again, perusing the glass display cabinet with its mountains of cakes.

“Well done, Cass.”

She kept staring at our boy while doing her hair twisting thing. “I never want him to forget about Jenna. Never. She raised him so well. It’s a tough act to follow.”

There was a question I’d wanted to ask but hadn’t yet dared. “What kind of guy was Chris?”

Her attention faded away from me to turn to the visitors on the other side of the glass window. “The first time I met him, he made me think of you. I mean, of how I expected you to be ten years down the line. It was before you went to Georgetown and Europe, and before the job you have now.”

She was now observing me and I hoped she wasn’t too disappointed about how I’d turned out.

“He was a quarterback in high school. I liked the idea of our son being taught football early on. He was also goofy and funny. Always telling jokes.”

“So, not like me then.”

“Come on, you can be funny… sometimes.” She flashed me the brightest smile and its warmth seeped deep inside me. “But the reason I chose them as Lucas’s parents was the way he and Jenna completed each other. They were polar opposites in many ways, but you couldn’t really imagine one without the other. They’d known each other since they were kids, so I guess that helped.”

I leaned forward so that I could ask the next question in a quieter voice. “And do you think we complete each other?”

Her eyebrow arched as if I’d startled her. “I hope we’re getting there.”

I slid my hands across the table to cover hers. Her skin was cold under mine, and I intertwined my fingers with hers. “You make me complete. You always have.” Being back with her had made me realize how much I’d lied to myself since the moment I let her go, back in high school. “Without you, I have no spark. Without you, I’m just a shell.”

“Sometimes, Champ, you come up with the lamest lines.” Her mouth cracked into a smile and she dropped a kiss on the back of my hand. “I didn’t expect anything, Josh, but you should be proud of the man you’ve become, for sure.” Her eyes became blurred and there was a wobble in her voice. “I am proud of you, proud you’re Lucas’s dad, and he’ll be too. Soon.”

“Can I have some cheesecake? There aren’t any chunks in it.” Speak of the devil.

I struggled to break away from Cassie but she was quicker to react. “Cheesecake is fine. Should we order some hot chocolate? I’m still freezing.”

“Yeah!”

And we had some hot, creamy chocolate. I even had mine with marshmallows in, which I hadn’t had since I was a kid. I spared one or two chunks for Lucas and gave them to him while Cassie was in the restroom. I didn’t feel too guilty about that because of the sparks of delight the marshmallows ignited in his eyes. His brown eyes that were so much like mine.

We stayed inside the coffee shop for a while, protected from the freezing wind that blew in from the Potomac. We had to rush out after I checked the time. Our trip back to D.C. was booked at four and we had ten minutes to make it back to the bank. We ran, holding Josh by the hands between us, making him hop every three steps. We made it inside the shelter, giggling and out of breath. However, the Spirit of Mount Vernon wasn’t quite ready to go. Something was up with its engine.

Lucas’s disappointment was evident in his drooping shoulders.

“Cheer up. I’m sure they’ll get it fixed in no time.” Cassie ruffled his brown hair, then proceeded to help him blow his runny nose.

Lucas kept staring through the glass window of the building into the dark waters of the Potomac. His hands rested flat against the window and his nose was glued to it. Cassie pulled him slightly away and he let her do so without taking his gaze away from the boat. There was another family waiting next to us, with one child still in a stroller, but who wanted out and was going crazy because he couldn’t.

A radio was playing in the background and the music, mixed with the child’s screams, made talking almost impossible. Cassie sat next to me, her hair a mess after our run in the wind, and I breathed in the scent of the cold air mixed with her shampoo. I bent toward her and rested my nose in the hollow of her neck. I kissed her there and my lips then followed her jawline to find her mouth.

The touch was electric and she tensed up against me. “We’re not alone.”

“Lucas has his back turned,” I mumbled while focusing my attention back on her neck. “And these guys are too busy keeping their offspring from having a full-blown breakdown.”

“Mmmm,” she purred.

My hand slid along the nape of her neck, my fingers combing her hair, and I pulled her tighter against me, while my other hand caressed her thigh. This was as far I could go in a public place with our son a few yards away.

And then a new song started playing. A melody I knew by heart because I’d heard Cassie humming it constantly for the last months.

The second time around

It’s the same sweet sound

Just more of you, more of me

To finally be free

She straightened up. Her hand flew to cover mine that lay on her thigh.

“Oh my God!” she whispered. “Oh my God!”

I broke the kiss and focused on the song despite the screams of the child.

“Well, I’ll be damned!”

“I can’t believe it. Shawn made it.” Cassie’s baby blue eyes rounded in surprise and I burst out laughing. I stopped when I noticed her chin was quivering.

My hands cradled her face and I lowered my forehead against hers. “You made it. Those are your words. This is your sound.”

“This is our song.”

A fat tear rolled down her cheeks and I kissed it.

“Why are you crying, Cassie?” Lucas stepped closer to us. His face was frozen in a worried look.

Cassie separated herself from me and swiveled round on the bench to face Lucas. She sniffed and extended her arm toward him. “I’m not sad, baby. I had a really nice surprise and I can’t keep the happiness inside.”

Lucas nodded, but his frown told me he wasn’t convinced.

“Come here.” Cassie drew him closer so that he nestled against her body.

The tips of his chubby fingers brushed the line that the tear had traced down her cheek. “I don’t want you to cry.”

“I’m sorry, Lucas. It’s just that the song playing on the radio… well, it’s a song I wrote.”

Lucas’s gaze rose to the ceiling as if the sound was coming from there. It required an effort to hear anything because of the wailing baby. Still, I noticed that his little feet started to tap in time with the rhythm and his shoulders began to sway. Cassie and I exchanged glances. It took a lot of effort to hide our smiles.

He started some weird wriggling and off-tune humming. His shoulders and his hips were so not in sync, that if I’d ever had any doubts he was my son, they’d just been extinguished. Lucas offered his hand to Cassie. At first she stared at it as if she had no idea what to do with it. She looked at me, then at Lucas, and with the slightest smile, she took his hand and stood.

The song was in the middle of an instrumental section. Lucas attempted to mimic the drumming by bashing his arms in the air. When he was finished with the performance, Cassie grabbed his hand again and danced with him, making him swirl around.

She motioned for me to join them again. I shook by head and mouthed a silent ‘No way.’ But it was a battle I’d already lost and I was reluctantly dragged into making a fool of myself. Even the wailing baby finally shut his mouth in shock.

I blocked out everything that was not the three of us and the song. Happiness engulfed the three of us. It was like reaching a shore after a long journey. It was like being a family at last.

CHAPTER 17

Cassie

It took me twelve hours to give birth to Lucas. I ended up on the operating table having a C-section. Back then I’d been wrecked. That had been nothing compared to today’s round-trip to Mount Vernon.

I wasn’t wrecked. I was totally exhausted. Out for the count.

I was also so freakin’ happy my heart was beating as fast as if I’d run the New York Marathon on speed.

“Cassie, can I have some fries?”

What next? Marshmallows with his chocolate? I’d spent the last months studying every book I could get my hands on, from Screamfree Parenting to Duct Tape Parenting, and the scary-sounding Raising Kids for True Greatness. I’d taken notes, asked our caseworker a truckload of questions and taken even more notes. Along the way, I’d also devoured Real Food for Healthy Kids. I had even made recipe cards based on it and filed them in a brand new folder labeled ‘LUCAS’ GOOD FOOD.’

I stared away from the pan where the chicken breast was frying in omega-loaded vegetable oil. Lucas sat at the wooden table we’d bought in a second-hand shop. A lick of paint had given it a new lease of life. I’d put a lot of work into the apartment but it was all worthwhile. From the new curtains to the glossy white of the walls, we now had a home.

“Maybe not, Champ. As if the cheesecake and the hot chocolate weren’t enough for one day.”

“But it’s Thanksgiving.” He gave me that pout he must have practiced in front of the mirror fifty times a day.

I reduced the flame on the burner and went to sit beside Lucas. He was drawing houses and planes and cars… all on the same piece of paper. It was getting crowded.

“Technically, Thanksgiving was yesterday,” Josh said. He’d made it out of the shower and he shook his wet hair as if he was staring in a shampoo ad. “That was what the turkey and the pumpkin pie were about, remember?”

“Okay.” Lucas pouted.

I felt bad for being the food police again. I wanted to be a good parent. But maybe I was trying too hard.

Josh, as he often did, read my brainwaves. He took a seat on the other side of Lucas. “We want to make you happy and enjoy your time with us, you know?” Lucas gave his signature nod. “But we also want the best for you, even if it makes us a bit boring.”

The sides of Lucas’s mouth curled. “You’re not boring.” His head did a back and forth between us. “I’d like to live with you.”

His voice said the words, but his face made it more like a question, as if he was afraid we could still say ‘no.’ But there was no way on earth—or anywhere else—that I was going to give up on my boy this time round… and he wanted to be with us.

His hand was clasped tightly around the pen. I wrapped my fingers around his so that he let go of it.

“We’ll take care of you, Lucas.” I blinked hard to keep the tears from welling up. “I promise you. No one will try harder.”

“I’ll try to be good too. I promise. I won’t be too naughty.”

I kissed his forehead and tasted the sugariness of his skin. “Just be yourself, baby, and we’ll try doing the same.”

Josh covered me with his gaze and it felt as soft as cotton. Then, out of the blue, Lucas’s arms were around my neck and he was giving me the wettest kiss ever. On both cheeks.

He sat back on his seat.

“Where did that come from?”

“You said people who love each other, they kiss each other… and I’m not going to kiss you on the mouth because that’s gross.”

“Are you saying you love me, Champ?”

“I love you. I love Josh too, but he’s a boy so I’m not going to kiss him. Not even on the cheek.”

Josh burst out laughing. “Yuk!” Lucas joined the laughter and they high-fived each other instead. The scene was like a dream. Two points on my back started to twitch. They were where my wings had started to grow. I was about to fly into the sky, carried away by happiness. Sometimes, I could be cheesier than Josh himself.

Then I crashed back to Earth, as Lucas’s face came over all serious. “What’s up?” I placed the tip of my index finger underneath his chin so that he met my eyes.

“Andrea is going to be sad.”

I really didn’t want to hear that name. “Why, baby?”

“Because she said she wanted to be my mom.”

My eyes met Josh’s. His brow was furrowed. Trisha, our caseworker back in Kansas City had warned us: for Lucas’s sake, we should never mention the adoption to him until the pre-placement visits. Apparently Andrea Loretti hadn’t bothered with that rule. I felt less sorry for her now.

“Okay, and what do you want?” I was treading a risky line, but we had to talk about it. We had the right to now. “It’s fine for you to say what you really mean.”

Josh came and knelt by my side so that he could be face-to-face with Lucas. “We’re friends. We’ll always be friends and friends tell each other the truth, even when it hurts sometimes. Don’t be scared to hurt us. The only thing that matters is that you’re happy.”

“I’m not happy with Sharon.” He chewed the end of his pencil. “She’s nice but she doesn’t cuddle me like my mommy did… like you do.” I smiled and fought back my tears. I still didn’t say anything. “I’m big now, but I need my cuddles.”

“Does Andrea cuddle you then?” Josh asked.

“She does but it’s not the same. She’s not my mommy or Cassie.”

Pride welled up in my chest.

“Andrea and her husband are nice and they like you very much.” Josh managed to keep his voice neutral. “We love you. Whoever you choose, we’ll still love you and we’ll always be your friends. No matter what.”

Panic flashed through Lucas’s eyes and his next words burst from him. “But I want to be with you two.”

I held back a sob. There was so much longing inside me, I was scared it was going to spill out. Josh took Lucas in his arms. “I believe we have a deal then, Champ. You’re coming to live with us.”

I waited for my turn to take him in my arms. I held him tight until he mumbled something against my shirt. “Cassie, it smells like burning.”

“Sh—ugar!” I ran back to the kitchen where the chicken breast I’d left simmering was now caramelized. “Noooo!” By the time I cooked another one it’d almost be Lucas’s bedtime. “Sorry, sweetheart. You’ll have to wait a bit longer for your dinner.”

The response that came from the living room was from Josh and Lucas at the same time, and it was mixed with giggles, “Can we have fries then?”

I sat at the foot of Lucas’s bed, as still as a statue because it’d taken ages for him to find sleep. He’d been over-tired. The day had been packed and our conversation before dinner, well, it’d been like a tumble-dryer of emotions and we were washed-out.

The door cracked open and a ray of light made it into the room for a split second then vanished. Josh came to my side on tiptoes. I prayed he wouldn’t wake up Lucas. I couldn’t survive another Dr. Seuss story, not after five in a row.

Josh took my hand and led me outside quietly. After each step I expected Lucas to call out my name. We made it back into the living room and waited behind the door for one minute. Each second ticked in our heads. No sound came from the bedroom and I let out a heavy breath of relief.

“It’s Cassie-time now,” Josh whispered.

“What do you mean?”

He walked me through the semi-darkness into our bathroom. Now, I loved our bathroom. It was one of those old, vintage ones that still managed to look cool. The icing on the cake for me was the standalone bathtub. Tonight, the bathroom was like the paradise where girls wanted to spend eternity, without any chance to make it back to life. As with the rest of our apartment, the lights were off, but the bathroom was illuminated by a string of candles. There were so many of them that I almost freaked that the house was going to burn down.

I stepped in, breaking from Josh’s touch. The scent shot up my nose and hit my brain. “Whoa! Perfumed candles?”

Josh leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms. “Wild daisies.”

“Why?”

He did a double take. “Because that’s your scent.”

“Really?”

“Have I never told you that?”

I shook my head. The smile that broke across my face was no match for the sweetness that seeped into my heart. “You’ve never told me anything about how I smelled before.”

“Tsk-tsk! Wrong choice of words, Cass. Not your smell, your scent. You’re the songwriter after all.”

“Okay, my wild daisy scent then…” I bent over the bathtub and my hand swept through the thick foam that topped the water. “… and bubbles?”

“Half a bottle of Soothing Sensations Bubble Bath.”

I dipped my fingers into the water again and I swirled them around. When I straightened back up my gaze settled on Josh. The candles threw fleeting shadows around the lines of his body. They also danced on his face and I drank in his beauty. The way a curl of his hair fell stubbornly over his forehead and teased his right eyebrow.

“You’re still missing something.” He nodded to where the basin stood. On one side of the tap there was a bottle and on the other were two tall glasses.

“Is that Champagne?”

“Taittinger. I got it when I was in Paris. I hid it for a special occasion.”

I peered at him from the corner of my eye. He hadn’t moved from the doorframe. Still, there was a more fragile vibe coming out from him.

“So let me sum things up: Wild daisy scented candles, check; half a gallon of bubble bath, check; real Champagne from France, check.”

“Yep.” I saw him swallow hard.

“Tell me, Champ: Are you trying to get me in the sack by any chance?”

“Technically, I’m trying to get you in the bath.”

“And we both know how technical you can be,” I teased him.

Josh stepped toward me. With each one of his steps, my skin tingled a bit more. When he stood over me, it felt like a blanket of heat washed over my body.

“I’m not trying to be technical right now. I’m just damn plain desperate.”

“Desperate?”

“Desperate to be in you.”

My mouth gaped and I struggled to recover. “What about ‘being ready’?”

“Fuck ‘being ready.’”

“That’s not very technical.”

“No, that’s explicit.”

“I like ‘explicit’ very much.” I eyed the Champagne. “Now please get me explicitly drunk by pouring some of that bubbly, will you?”

Josh granted my request and I sipped through my drink holding his gaze. The silence didn’t bother me for once. It was filled with whatever we hadn’t done yet and what we were about to do. That was plenty enough and there was no more to say except…

“Lock the door.”

Once again, Josh obeyed without question. I enjoyed having the upper-hand. I laid my glass on the edge of the basin careful that it didn’t tip over. The Champagne had fuzzied up my brain and my senses. My gaze caught our reflection in the mirror and met with Josh’s. His had turned unreadable. It was like he was letting me write the next chapter.

I cut the bond by lowering my head and bringing my hands around the button at the top of my shirt. My fingers were shaking and I wished I had another glass of Champagne running through my veins. I slowly made my way down, not allowing my eyes to wander anywhere other than my shirt. I’d sounded all cocky before but that had been one-hundred percent bluff.

I let my shirt slide down along my arms and fall on the floor. My nipples hardened under the lace of my bra. I pooled my courage together and looked up at Josh. “Your turn.”

The one-sided smile he gave me was so naughty I wriggled to stick my knees together. Josh’s hands didn’t shake at all when he undid his shirt smoothly and quickly. I licked my upper-lip at the sight of his chest and the sinewy lines defining his shoulders. They were strong shoulders, shoulders I could cry on, shoulders that could shelter me. From anything.

“I love you.” The flatness of my voice clashed with the passion burning inside me.

Josh aligned his body on mine. I expected him to say the words back. Instead he knelt at my feet and his hands circled around my waist. His fingertips brushed my hipbones when he reached for the button of my jeans. I heard the zipper snaking down and felt it against me. Soon my jeans were at my feet and Josh nudged me to step aside. I did.

His palms cradled the back of my calves and then he caressed his way up to the top of my legs, tucking the length of his fingers underneath my panties. Between my legs. They stayed there while my heartbeat plummeted downward. Between my legs too.

He pressed his lips on the fragment of skin between my panties and my belly button, right above my scar. His kiss was healing. It lasted until he spoke, “Undo your bra.”

His gaze burnt me but I didn’t hesitate and, in one move and with steady hands, my bra landed on top of my shirt. I didn’t have time to worry about the scary lack of support because, in the next beat, my panties were around my ankles and, in the next they landed on top of my bra, my shirt, and my jeans.

I didn’t dare to move. I’d never stood naked in front of him—in front of anybody—but I forgot to be self-conscious.

“You are beautiful and I love you.”

“I know.” I knew about his love and, right that second, I felt goddamn irresistible.

Josh stood and he led me like a child to the bathtub. He held my hand while I got into the water. The heat took away any tension left in me. I lay back with the water lapping at my nipples. The steam had left a sheen over my face. I kept my eyes shut the whole time Josh undressed. That was the blushing virgin in me… the virginal mother of one.

He got into the water, facing me, and his legs encased mine. If I stretched, I’d be reaching extra sensitive parts of him.

“You can open your eyes now. I’m presentable.” I did and he chuckled. “You weren’t so prudish the first time in the back of my truck.”

“There was less build-up.”

“Speak for yourself, I was a horny sixteen-year old when we started dating. It took us a year to commit the deed. There were many cold showers, believe me.”

“You never were pushy about it and you made our first time so romantic.” His hands looped around my ankles. “It’s difficult to top tonight though.”

“There were already candles—”

“—and cocoa.”

“We’re old enough now for Champagne.”

“And we’re married.” Okay, now was the time! “Josh, I think, you remember what you said—” Damn, I was rambling. I took a big breath and blurted, “I’m ready now.”

He bent forward, circled my wrists and pulled me over. I straddled him and I welcomed the feel of him against me. “Just in case you haven’t noticed, I’m very ready too.”

I chuckled but the sound ended in a rasp. In a flash, his hands shot from my wrists to my butt, cupping it, and pressing me tight against his hardness. I laid my forehead against his and our mouths were inches apart. His lips had never made me so hungry. I worshiped their curves with the tips of my fingers. It was my turn to make a move. So, very slowly, I lowered my mouth to touch his. Its softness made me shudder and I arched my back.

“God!” Josh muttered against my mouth. He shut his eyes. “Careful, Cass. You want me to last longer than I did at seventeen, don’t you?”

“If my memory serves me well, you over-delivered back in the day.” I didn’t want to think of our night in Oxford because, in so many ways, it hadn’t been us.

“You ain’t seen nothing at all.” Josh’s hands ran along my spine and his lips sought mine, parting them, teasing my tongue.

He made love to my mouth before making love to me.

When we ended in our bed, much, much later, my skin was all pruned and my hair a wet mess. Josh didn’t seem to care. He lay behind me, his chest warm against my back, his hands interweaved with mine.

“Good night, Mrs. MacBride,” he whispered.

“Good night, Mr. O’Malley,” I whispered back.