Текст книги "Forever with You"

Автор книги: Laurelin Paige

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Текущая страница: 11 (всего у книги 22 страниц)

Chapter Thirteen

After Hudson left, I cried so long and so hard that it seemed like I should have passed out from exhaustion. But I didn’t. I tried curling up in bed, but it felt too big. And no matter how many blankets I had, I felt cold. Eventually, I wandered out to the library where I had a few more shots of tequila to warm up and turned on a movie from my AFI’s Greatest Films collection. I chose Titanic. I was already heartbroken, after all—might as well wallow in it.

Sometime before the ship sunk, I passed out on the couch. I woke the next day with swollen eyes and a splitting headache. My first thought was that I needed caffeine. But there was no smell of brewing coffee in the penthouse, and that’s when I remembered that Hudson wasn’t there. Every day before he left for work, he set the Keurig to brew for me. This simple missing gesture threatened to start a new round of tears.

But maybe he’d called.

I fumbled around for my phone and found it buried in the cushions. Fuck. It was dead. I’d been too consumed with grief to charge it for the night. After setting it up at the library charging station, I made my own coffee and found some Ibuprofen in the bathroom cabinet.

I showered then, hoping the warm water would relieve the swelling of my eyes. Perhaps it did, but I didn’t feel any better. Afterward, I stood with a towel wrapped around myself and stared into the steam-clouded mirror. This was what it was like to see Hudson now—through this fog, knowing that something more lay underneath. If only it were as simple as stretching my hand out and wiping away the condensation to see the man beneath. If only he’d let me in, maybe it would be that easy. Maybe then my touch could finally bring him into focus.

But it wasn’t that simple. Instead, all I could hope for was a message or a missed call. I dressed and settled back on the couch to power up my cell.

There was nothing.

So I sent one to him: Come home.

When I didn’t have a response after five minutes, I considered sending another. He was at work. I shouldn’t bother him. But I was supposed to be important. If he still cared at all, he’d answer me.

I battled with myself over it. In my past, obsessive texting and calling had been my biggest weakness. For more than a year after I started therapy, I didn’t even allow myself to have a phone. The temptation was too great. In the height of my obsessing, I could fill a voicemail box within an hour. Paul Kresh had to change his number after I texted him nonstop for three days straight.

Even with Hudson, I carefully weighed each message I sent him. I didn’t send everything I was thinking. It was hard, but I had managed to stay in control.

Today, I didn’t give a fuck about control.

I typed a new message: Are you going to avoid me now?

Five minutes later, I sent again: The least you can do is talk to me.

I sent several more, delaying each by a span of three to five minutes:

You said I was everything to you.

Talk to me.

I won’t ask about it if you don’t want to.

This isn’t fair. Shouldn’t I be the one who’s mad?

I was about to start another when my phone vibrated in my hand with a received text. It was from him: I’m not mad. I’m not avoiding you. I don’t know what to say.

Hudson at a loss for words was the craziest thing I’d heard in the last two days. He always knew what to say, always knew what to do. If our separation had him so out of character, why were we apart?

My fingers could barely enter a response fast enough. Don’t say anything. Just come home.

I can’t. Not yet. We need time.

I had hoped the new morning would bring clarity. But I still wasn’t even sure what I was supposed to be doing with the time that he insisted we needed. I don’t need time. I need you.

We’ll talk later.

You don’t understand. I have to talk now. I’ll keep texting you. I can’t help myself.

And I’ll read every one.

I almost smiled at his last message. After all the years of being ignored and called crazy, Hudson embraced my whacked out tendencies.

But one sweet little text wasn’t enough to erase the hollow ache in my chest. I started to type out another message.

Then I stopped myself.

What the hell was I doing? Never mind old habits and what was healthy and what wasn’t—why was I chasing after this man so desperately when he’d already clearly indicated it would have no effect on him? Besides, he’d said over and over that he liked my obsessing over him. It made him feel loved.

Well, fuck that.

If Hudson wanted to feel loved, he could come home and work things out. Yes, we had troubled pasts and were inexperienced with relationships. Still, sooner or later we had to grow up and take responsibility for our actions. More than anything in the world, I wanted to do that with Hudson. But if he wasn’t ready, it didn’t matter how much I loved him. I couldn’t be the only one fighting. He had to fight too.

In one of the strongest moments of my adult life, I set down my phone and walked away.

Since I wasn’t insane enough to believe my strength would last, I decided to get out of the house. And I needed a run.

I called Jordan. “Hey, you’re a runner right?”

“Ms. Withers?”

“You were Special Ops. You had to stay in shape for that, right?” The idea had crossed my mind before, but since Hudson had been so opposed, I’d never pursued it. But now Hudson wasn’t around. “And I imagine that makes you a fairly good runner.”

“Yes, I suppose so.”

“Good. I want to go for a run and Hudson won’t let me go without a bodyguard. I’ll be ready in fifteen.”

He hesitated for only half a beat. “Be there in ten, Ms. Withers.”

“Thank you.” It had been surprisingly easier than I’d expected. Might as well see what else I could get. “And, oh my god, Jordan, please call me Laynie. Please, please, please. I know you’re not supposed to, but I don’t care about Hudson’s stupid rules. I’m having a bad day and I could use a friend. Even if you aren’t really my friend, pretend. Please.”

“You should know me well enough to know that I’m not much good at pretending.” The phone jostled as if he were getting ready while he talked to me. “But I am an excellent runner. Be ready to have your ass handed to you. Laynie.”

I was almost grinning when I met him in the lobby. This was new for me—life actually going on in the midst of heartache. Who knew it was possible?

* * *

True to his word, Jordan handed me my ass on our run. The six miles we did around Central Park barely seemed to faze him, while I nearly had to be carried back to the penthouse. The physical discomfort was welcomed—it matched my sullen mood. The adrenaline and endorphin rush did little to improve my spirits, but it did make the act of living seem just a bit more bearable.

Back at the penthouse, I showered and got dressed. Then I did go to my phone. I scrolled through my texts looking for another from Hudson. The disappointment at finding none was hard to swallow. Even though he’d said he wouldn’t respond, I had hoped. Wasn’t it just the morning before that he’d said I was the center of his world? Was there any way he could still mean it?

I couldn’t think about the answer. The evidence wasn’t in my favor and it hurt too much to face.

Needing another distraction from reaching out to Hudson, I called Brian. We chatted for over an hour—a record for us. After that, I called Liesl. We were both working that night, which provided a perfect excuse for shopping and dinner beforehand. My heart wasn’t in it, but I could fake it with the best of them. And being with Liesl helped keep the tears at bay.

It had already been a full day by the time Jordan dropped us off at The Sky Launch. “My shift’s over, Laynie,” Jordan said as he shut the car door behind me. “Reynold’s waiting for you up there.”

Sure enough, I spotted Reynold by the club’s employee entrance.

Though I’d never done it before, I felt the urge to hug Jordan. So I did. “Thank you,” I said, my throat tightening. “I needed you and you were there.”

Jordan looked at me compassionately. “It’s not my place, but you should know—Mr. Pierce is a complicated man.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” I wasn’t interested in anyone defending Hudson at the moment.

Jordan continued anyway. “But no matter how complex the situation may be, it’s easy to see how he feels about you.”

I stuck my chin out, defiantly. “Is it?” I’d thought it was, but now all bets were off.

My driver patted my upper arm. “Perhaps not to you. But to me, it’s obvious. I pray that he’ll figure out how to show you before you’re gone for good.”

I watched Jordan as he got in the car and drove away.

Me, gone for good? It had been Hudson who’d left. Hudson who’d broken the promise he’d made to stand by my side through everything. Hudson who’d dropped not so subtle hints at a long-lasting future and yet he was now nowhere by my side.

With a sinking horror, I feared that Jordan was right—Hudson’s feelings for me were obvious. Obviously gone.

I bit my lip to curtail any crying that latest thought might bring on.

Liesl wrapped her arm around mine and directed me toward the door. “Do you get sick of the bodyguard stuff?” She was excellent at deflecting. “I mean, I wouldn’t get sick of that Jordan dude—he’s hot.”

“And gay.”

“Figures. But maybe he’s also experimental.”

I laughed. “Not likely.” My laughter quickly faded into a frown—it felt too strange to be amused when my heart was so heavy. “I don’t usually mind having bodyguards around, though I do like my independence. And I don’t really get why I need to have someone here while I’m at the club.” An idea surfaced. “In fact—”

We’d reached Reynold by then. “Hey, stranger,” I said in greeting. “Guess what. I’m giving you the night off.”

He chuckled.

“I’m serious. Hudson is probably the only one who has the power to give you the night off, but here’s the thing—Hudson’s not around. And I’ll be here at the club all night. We have security guards on staff and bouncers. I’m going to be fine.”

I couldn’t say why it was so important for me to send Reynold away, but it suddenly was. Perhaps it was an act of defiance. If Hudson wasn’t willing to give in our relationship, then I wasn’t willing either. Or not as willing as I had been, anyway. I was too pissed. Wasn’t that a phase of grief?

Besides, I felt strong. I didn’t need someone following me around. And Celia hadn’t been around in several days—maybe she was bored with the game.

“So I’ll see you when I’m off later. Okay?”

Reynold seemed dumbfounded. “Uh, sure. At three. I’ll, uh, be here at three.”

“Awesome.”

The victory with Reynold bolstered me. I hadn’t known how I’d be able to get through the night at work. Now I thought I might actually be able to do it. I hadn’t forgotten my pain—more thoughts than not had been filled with Hudson—but the misery was almost tolerable.

The time with Liesl had been the most helpful. We hadn’t seen much of each other recently, and there was a lot to catch up on. I told her everything that had been going on, including Celia’s stalking and Hudson’s secretive behavior. It was depressing but also therapeutic.

“Maybe Hudson is really, like, a CIA guy,” Liesl said as I handed her a cash drawer for the bar. “And Celia’s his partner. And he’s abandoned his mission—defected, or whatever they call that, and she’s trying to reel him back in.”

Her crazy ideas were almost entertaining. “That one’s definitely it.”

She nudged me aside with her hip to take her place in front of the register. “I wish you’d be serious about this. I know I’m right.”

I forced a smile. “Excuse me for being—what do they call it? Oh, yeah—based in reality.”

Liesl ran a hand through her purple tresses and laughed. “Reality is so overrated.”

“Isn’t it?”

We got lost in the hustle and bustle of the night after that. David had trained with Gwen the night before, but it was the first shift that I really got to see her in action. She’d worked enough now that she knew what she was doing. I watched her as she managed the upper floor, keeping on top of change orders and unruly customers, not once missing a beat. She was good, and I’d never felt better about my decision to hire her. Especially now that my whole future at The Sky Launch felt in limbo.

With a shudder, I swallowed the sob forming in my throat. I couldn’t think about that. Not here. Not now. In perhaps the same delusional manner I’d used in my days of Paul Kresh or David Lindt, I focused on convincing myself that Hudson and I were fine. This was just a blip. We’d recover and life would go on together.

Somehow it had been easier in the past. I hoped that said more about the current state of my mental health and less about my future with Hudson.

It was still early in the night, only a little past eleven, when I saw Celia.

I’d just come down from the upstairs to check in with the bartenders on the main floor. They were busy but not slammed. I slid behind the bar where Liesl was working and scanned the club, not looking for anything in particular—just getting a general sense of the scene.

The center of the club was surrounded by bunches of seating areas. They usually filled early in the evening. They were the best tables to get since they were right off the dance floor. She was the only one at her table, which was odd for a Saturday night, and that drew my attention. No one sat alone at The Sky Launch.

But there Celia was—alone, wearing tight jeans and a tight tank, her hair down around her shoulders. It was so uncharacteristic of her usual prim and proper look that I wasn’t sure it was her. Then she caught my stare, and the wicked grin she gave me confirmed it.

I grabbed Liesl’s forearm. “Oh my god.”

“What? What is it? Did I fuck up the last order?” Her eyes were wide and alarmed.

“No. She’s here. Celia!” I nodded toward the woman who still had her eyes locked on mine.

Liesl followed my gaze. “The stalker chick? Should I kick her ass?”

“No.” Though the thought of the tall Amazon at my side kicking the ass of my now arch-nemesis was pretty entertaining.

Liesl squinted as she continued to study Celia. “No offense, but she’s a knockout. Not like you’re not a knockout, but I’d do her.” She bumped me affectionately with her shoulder. “I’d do you harder, though. Of course.”

“Wow. I can’t believe she actually came here.” Maybe I should call Reynold to come back. I instantly dismissed the idea. With everyone around, what could she do to me? Even her constant watch was nothing more than annoying.

Rows of goose bumps lined my arms despite my attempts to remain nonplussed. Well, I’d made it over three hours at work before having an emotional breakdown. That was something, right?

“What’s going on?” David asked.

I turned to find Gwen and David had joined us. Which meant it was time to get back to the job. “Nothing.” I certainly wasn’t sharing my Celia story with my ex-boyfriend and an employee I barely knew.

Apparently, Liesl felt differently. “That girl over there is Laynie’s crazy stalker.”

“Liesl!” I smacked her shoulder with the back of my hand.

“I’m not going to stand by as the only one who knows about this. You need some backup. What if she does something to you? You know, roofies your drink or something.”

“Right. ‘Cause I’m drinking openly tonight.” She was my closest friend, but sometimes she lacked in the intelligence department.

Gwen raised an eyebrow. “You have a stalker? You’re cooler than I thought.”

I rolled my eyes. “She’s not…it’s not…I don’t even know why she’s…” I let out an exasperated breath. “It’s complicated. I’m going in the back room if you all need me.”

Without looking back, I headed to the employee lounge behind the bar. Seeing Celia had thrown me, and in the shape I was in, that was enough to send me over the edge. I paced the room, trying to get a hold of the composure I’d had earlier in the evening.

Gwen and David followed.

I considered telling them I wanted to be alone. But I wasn’t sure I did.

“Are you okay, Laynie?” David’s voice was tentative and tender.

“No. Yes. I’m fine. I’m just…”I shook my head, unable to finish the thought. My chest was tight and my head felt like it was going to explode.

“Well, tell us something about her. Your stalker.” Gwen genuinely seemed like she wanted to be helpful. “A name. How you know her. Anything.”

“Her name’s Celia Werner.” I was surprised at my willingness to share, yet even more, I needed to talk.

“As in Werner Media?” David kept abreast of the who’s who in the business world. Of course he’d recognize her name.

“That’s the one,” I confirmed.

David stepped closer to me, concern on his face.

“It’s nothing to worry about, David. She’s just not happy about me being with Hudson.”

“Is she the ex?” Gwen asked.

“Yeah.” When I’d said that in therapy, it was because it was easier. Now after the video, it was what I truly believed. “She is.” For the millionth time, my mind went to thoughts of her kissing Hudson. What else had they done? How close had they been? Had he slept with her?

I swallowed the bile that threatened to come up. “So now she’s trying to scare me by showing up where I am. Sending me messages. Stuff like that.”

“Do you want us to kick her out? I can call Sorenson up from the door.” Unlike Hudson, David’s protective mode was subtle, but I recognized it in his face all the same.

“She’s not going to hurt me.”

“Are you sure?” David put a hand on my shoulder.

“No.” I stepped casually out of his grasp. Despite its innocence, his touch felt like a betrayal to Hudson. “But I don’t want her to win.”

“Fair enough.” His body language told me that my brush-off had stung. Another reason it was good he was leaving.

Gwen turned a plastic chair around and straddled it. “It’s creepy how she just stares at you like she does.”

“Isn’t it?” I was still trying to decide how I felt about Gwen knowing about my private life.

“We could spike her drink.”

Now this sounded interesting. “With what?”

“I don’t know. Spit.”

I didn’t laugh, but I managed a genuine smile. Okay, Gwen was officially cool. And maybe I needed more people involved in my life—more than just Hudson and his family. The phone call with Brian, the run with Jordan, the day with Liesl—all of it reminded me that there was a whole world outside the one I’d been living in. A world with friends and interests that I’d forgotten about recently.

Whether or not Hudson and I had a future together, I had a future of my own. I couldn’t ignore the people that belonged in that future anymore and just hope that they’d still be there when I needed them. And Gwen was now a part of The Sky Launch. That made her family. It was time to embrace her as such.

But just because they were family didn’t mean I had to talk about everything with them. And talking wasn’t calming me down anyway.

“You know what? I’m fine,” I lied. “Don’t worry about me. Let’s get back out there where we can at least keep an eye on her.”

With Gwen in the lead, we stepped back into the club, the flashing lights and thumping beat washing over me with a familiar comfort.

I ran into Gwen’s back when she stopped short. “Ah,” she said. “She knows we were talking about her. She’s calling in reinforcements.” She lifted her chin toward Celia. “See?”

I looked toward my stalker and saw she had her cell to her ear.

Just then Liesl walked over to me with the bar phone in her hand, the cord stretched almost to its max distance. “There you are, Laynie, phone call.”

“Oh, shit.” Gwen’s eyes were wide, and I imagined they mirrored my own.

Was Celia calling me?

“Let me take it,” David offered.

“And say what?” I shook my head decisively. “I’ve got it.” What was she going to say to me, anyway?

I took the receiver from Liesl’s hand, my own hand surprisingly steady. “Hello?”

“Alayna, where is your bodyguard?”

The voice on the line shocked me more than if it had been Celia. “Hudson.” I said his name out loud, looking around at my coworkers so they’d know who it was. “Hello to you, too.”

A mixture of disappointment and elation swept over me. I’d almost wanted the call to be from Celia—more and more, I was eager to confront her.

But on the other hand, it was Hudson on the phone. Hudson! I’d longed for his voice all day. I didn’t even care about the circumstances for his call—he’d called, that was the point.

“Ah, it’s not even her,” Gwen said. “That was some mind fuck.”

David agreed. “I think she must have been checking messages. I never saw her mouth move.”

I looked back at Celia, who was, sure enough, pocketing her phone.

“Could you answer the question, please?” Hudson’s voice in my ear drew my attention back to him.

It took me a second to remember what he’d asked—oh, about my bodyguard. As glad as I was to hear from him, I wasn’t about to make things easy. “Why do you care?”

“Goddammit, Alayna!”

His voice was so loud that I had to lean my ear away from the receiver. Well, what had I expected? That Reynold wouldn’t tell him? “I sent him home. I figured I didn’t really need him at the club.”

“How’s that working out for you?” His sarcasm was lined with frustration.

“I’m fine! With the security guards and cameras and the bouncers…” It took a second for me to realize what his statement meant. “How do you know she’s here?”

“Because I’m outside.”

“You’re outside? Why are you outside?” My heart sped up. He hadn’t just called, he was here. I covered the mouthpiece with my hand. “Liesl, hurry, grab the cordless.”

Hudson continued. “Thank god your bodyguard works for me and not for you. You don’t have the authority to send him home.”

Don’t have the authority…? “Jesus Christ.”

“And when he noticed Celia…”

Liesl handed me the cordless. “Thank you,” I whispered.

“Alayna, are you listening to me?”

“Yes. I’m working here too, you know.” I punched the talk button on the cordless and handed the other phone to Liesl. “Go on.” Then, I bee-lined for the front of the club. If Hudson was there, I wanted to see him, wanted to see the look in his eyes and in his face. See if I could read the emotion that I needed to see from him.

“When he saw Celia entering The Sky Launch, he contacted me, as he’s supposed to do, and asked me if he should go in as well since you didn’t want him on the premises. I told him yes. So Reynold will be there whether you want him to be or not.”

“Fine.” I didn’t really care anymore. “Send him on in.”

“I already did.”

“Of course you did.” I was almost at the bottom of the ramp now. The club was picking up for the night, and I was fighting against traffic. “But why are you here? You could have arranged all that over the phone.” Had he wanted to see me as much as I wanted to see him?

He paused. “I wanted to be sure you were okay.” His tone was softer. It tugged at my chest.

“I’m okay.” Well, since Hudson was still sleeping in another apartment, maybe that wasn’t the right word. “I’m safe, anyway.”

“Good.” He cleared his throat. “Then I’ll talk to you later.”

“Hudson, wait!” I was at the front door now, the night air cool compared to the warmth of the club. Not wanting to be seen, I stayed tucked behind the doorman.

“What is it, Alayna?”

I scanned the circle drive in front of the club. There he was standing next to his Mercedes, the emergency lights flashing as he paced the sidewalk next to the car. He was in another three-piece suit. It was late, why was he still dressed for work? And had he really driven all the way out to the club just to leave without seeing me face-to-face?

My next words bubbled with the hurt I’d carried all day. “Is that all you have to say to me?”

“Right now, yes.” He shoved his hand through his hair. “You’re protected. That’s what’s important right now.”

He’d been concerned—that much was obvious. His hair was tussled as if he’d ran his hand through it more than just the one time, and his agitation was present in his stride.

It wasn’t enough. If he really cared, I’d be in his arms. He’d have come in and found me instead of the other way around. “Have you considered that if you just told Celia that you’d left me that she’d probably drop this whole thing?”

He shook his head, even though he had no idea I could see him. “I didn’t leave you.”

“It sure feels like you did.”

He leaned his hand on the top of his car and looked toward the club entrance. “Is that what you want?”

“No!” Never. “No. I just want the truth. That’s all.” The doorman shifted, and my cover was blown. Hudson’s eyes met mine.

We stared at each other, locked in our gaze, for several long moments. Even across the hundred feet of sidewalk, there was a current between us. An electric spark that ignited from so much more than chemistry or lust. It was an emotional charge that surged right from the heart of me. We were connected, so completely, that for the first time since he’d walked out of the penthouse the night before, I felt a flash of hope.

He broke the gaze first. He looked to the passenger window of the car, as if someone were inside, talking to him through the glass.

I stepped forward, squinting to see. “Oh my god, are you…?” My stomach fell. “Hudson, are you with Norma?”

Hudson threw his hands in the air. “Not now, Alayna.”

I started toward him. “Are you fucking kidding me? One day gone and you’re out with her?”

He circled around to the driver’s side of the car. “It’s for business!” The door slammed.

I picked up my pace, even knowing he’d be gone by the time I reached the curb. “At this time of night?” In a suit, by themselves. How fucking stupid did he think I was?

“It’s…I can’t get into this right now.” He pulled out onto the road. “Why can’t you ever just trust me?”

“Because you can never tell me the truth!” I watched the taillights of the car as they mixed in with the rest of the traffic. It was comical, really, to ask for his trust when I’d just witnessed him on what could be described no other way but as a date.

“I have to go. I can’t talk to you while I’m driving.”

I could hear Norma’s voice in the background. I wanted his attention on me, not her. “Wait, don’t—”

“Goodbye, Alayna.”

“—hang up.” The dial tone replaced his voice. “Dammit!” I screamed and threw the phone down on the sidewalk. Hard. It shattered into pieces. Seemed fitting, considering that’s how I felt inside.

“Laynie, are you okay?” David’s voice was neither surprising nor comforting. Of course he’d come after me. It was a nice gesture—I just wished he were somebody else.

“Yeah.” Total lie. My entire body felt weak. Like I could just fall over there on the sidewalk, unable to walk or even crawl back to the club.

But I was strong. I could ignore the fact that I had died inside until I was alone at home. “Yeah, I’m fine,” I said again. “I broke the phone.” I bent down to collect the pieces off the sidewalk.

David squatted next to me to help. “It’s technically Pierce’s phone.”

“Well, that makes me feel better.” Marginally. “Funny, this is the second phone I’ve destroyed on account of that man.”

“Maybe that means something.”

“Maybe.” I knew what David wanted it to mean. I didn’t want to think about what it could mean for me.

When we’d gathered all the parts, David stood and held his hand out to help me stand. Reluctantly, I took it. He didn’t let go right away, though. Worse, I didn’t pull away.

David studied me with soft eyes. “I’m not going to ask because I know what you’ll say. I’m just going to do.”

“What?” Next thing I knew, I’d been pulled into his embrace. “Oh.”

“It seemed like you could use a hug.”

I hesitated for only a second. Then I gave in. For me, it was comfort from a friend, comfort that I needed. He may have taken it as more, but in that moment, my need outweighed his.

Except then he pulled me in tighter. And his arms felt strange and his scent was wrong. As gently as I could, I began to push away. “I think I better…”

David released me, his eyes pinned on the club door behind us. “Hey, look. She’s leaving.”

I turned to look. Celia was indeed leaving. She’d seen our hug, I was sure. It didn’t matter. Even if she told Hudson, he’d been out with Norma Anders. I was certain his trumped mine in terms of disappointing a lover.

David’s smile grew tight. “Man, I don’t know anything about her, but that smile was wicked. What a bitch.”

The pain and hurt of the past twenty-four hours subsided then, leaving in its wake a tidal wave of rage. I was angry, so angry. While a lot of my wrath was meant for Hudson, the greatest portion belonged to Celia. Without her, Hudson and I might be able to work through our differences. But how could we when she was always around, reminding us of our pasts, stirring up our distrust?

My hands balled into fists. “You know what? This is ridiculous. I’m confronting her.”

“Laynie, I’m not so sure you should.” But that was the extent to which David tried to stop me.

I’d covered more than half the distance between me and Celia when a figure stepped from out of the club and blocked my progression.

“Ms. Withers.” Reynold put a gentle but firm hand up to stop me from proceeding. “Not a good idea.”

He was right. As worked up as I was, I probably would have punched her. And though it would have felt good, it would be me with the restraining order then, not Celia.

Still, I had to wonder what my bodyguard’s orders had been. Did Hudson mean to keep me from trouble, or was he worried if I talked to his ex that I’d learn things he didn’t want me to know? “One question, Reynold. Are you protecting me from her? Or protecting her from me?”

“I don’t catch your drift.”

And even if he did, he likely wouldn’t answer honestly. “Never mind.”

By then, Celia had made it to the curb and was hailing a cab. Determined to not let her get away without some victory chalked in my square, I approached our doorman. “You see that woman? She’s not to be let back in here. Permanently banned.”

The doorman nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

“I’ll hang her picture in the back room.” I’d print something off the Internet. Maybe it wasn’t a good move to let her know that she’d gotten to me, but honestly, I didn’t care about her game. I simply wanted my life back. Kicking her out of my club was a good first step.

* * *

It was just past three when I crawled into bed. Though it still felt too big and lonely, I was pretty sure I was exhausted enough to sleep. It was worth a try anyway.