Текст книги "Faithful"

Автор книги: Kelly Elliott

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Текущая страница: 5 (всего у книги 25 страниц)

I sat there and listened to Gunner and Jeff talk about their lives. Married and with kids? Fuck me.

Then, I remembered the engagement ring. My parents had already come back from Starbucks, but they’d left with Heather for a bit to let Gunner and Jeff visit with me. Victoria had kept coming in every fifteen minutes. She was back again, and this time, she was leaning up against the bed, talking to Gunner.

“Hey, Tori, do you think I could have a few minutes alone with Jeff and Gunner? I need to talk to them about some things in private,” I said as I winked at her.

I watched as a blush slowly crept up her face. I wanted to roll my eyes at her reaction, but instead, I gave her my smile.

“Sure, babe. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Leaning down, she went to give me a kiss on the cheek. When I turned my head away, she stood back up.

“Oh shit, sorry. Old habits are hard to break,” she said as she smiled at me.

Once she shut the door, Jeff let out a laugh. “Motherfucker, some things never change!”

“Fuck, Josh, what did you ever see in that girl?” Gunner asked as he ran his hand through his hair.

I let out a laugh, but I stopped as soon as the pain in my side shot through my whole body.

“Fuck, don’t answer that. I already know what you’re gonna say…especially since your ass thinks you’re the old you!” Jeff smiled at me.

“The old me? What’s the new me like?” I asked as Jeff and Gunner looked at each other.

“Well, from what we saw when we walked in, I take it you know that you and Heather are dating?” Gunner asked with a grin.

I nodded. “There’s something about that girl. She’s exactly what I’ve been looking for. I’ve never felt like this before.”

Jeff smiled at me and shook his head. “Josh, you’re fucking madly in love with her. You were even gonna ask—”

Gunner hit Jeff in the arm.

I let out a laugh. Shit, the pain. “I already know I was going to ask her to marry me the night I had the accident. My parents told me they found the ring on me when they brought me into the hospital.”

Gunner smiled. “Yeah, dude, we went with you to pick it out. You were fucking nervous as hell, too.”

Jeff started laughing. “You were shaking from head to toe, but man…you picked out a beautiful ring.”

“Can I ask y’all something?”

“Of course, Josh. We’re like brothers. You know you can always ask us anything,” Jeff said.

“Have I been…well, you know…with Heather…have I been, um…well…”

“Jesus, spit it the hell out.” Gunner started to laugh.

“Have I been good to her? I mean…I haven’t fucked around on her, have I?”

Jeff looked at me and smiled. “Dude, the moment you realized you loved her, you went for, like, months without sex. I actually started to worry about you.” He threw his head back and laughed.

“Let’s just say, the road y’all have traveled on was not so straight, but when you finally got together…dude, you loved her with all your heart. There’s a reason you’re feeling the way you are, Josh. A love like what you and Heather share…it never goes away. Just take it slow. It’ll come back. For now, just enjoy it. Get to know each other again. In a way, you’re a lucky bastard.” Gunner smiled, shaking his head.

I looked at Gunner, confused. “How the hell do you figure that? I’ve lost all these years, Gun. I can’t even remember the girl I’m in love with. For fuck’s sake, I was planning on asking her to marry me!”

Gunner smiled at me. “Josh, you get to fall in love with her all over again. You can experience all those first moments with her. Dude, you get to sweep her off her feet again and make her fall in love with you even more.”

Jeff stared at Gunner and shook his head. “Jesus H. Christ, who the fuck taught you this sappy-ass shit?”

I started to laugh as I grabbed my side. “Oh shit. What about my truck?” If anything happened to my Dodge, I swear I’m going to kill that motherfucking drunk driver.

Gunner and Jeff both looked at each other.

“Dude, it’s totaled,” Gunner said.

“But don’t worry. You were actually getting ready to buy a new truck,” Jeff said as he glanced back at Gunner.

“My truck is totaled? Fuck! I was gonna buy a new Dodge? What was wrong with mine?”

Jeff smiled. “You weren’t gonna get a Dodge, dude. You were tired of that truck. Bitch had no balls. You were looking at an F-250 diesel. You needed power for pulling the trailer with your furniture.”

Gunner snapped his head over to Jeff.

I was getting a fucking Ford? Jesus, I really have changed. “Wait, what do you mean, ‘with your furniture’? I’m working for my dad?”

“You bought out your dad. It’s your business, dude, and you’re doing great,” Gunner said with a smile.

No fucking way. I own my dad’s business.

Just then, Victoria came back in. “Time to get you to do some deep breathing, babe,” she said as she winked at me.

Jeff looked Tori up and down as if she were a bug that should be stepped on. Gunner looked everywhere but at Tori.

Victoria noticed Gunner avoiding her. She walked up to him and ran her hand through his hair, and he immediately pulled away from her. “You still a deep breather during sex, Gun?”

Gunner turned and glared at Victoria.

What the fuck? Gunner slept with Victoria?

“Oh fuck no, Gunner!” Jeff said.

Victoria threw her head back and laughed. “Oh fuck yeah. I dare say Josh gave Gunner a run for his money though.” She looked back at me and smiled.

I couldn’t even think. Gunner slept with Tori. When? Before or after me? Fucking bastard never said a word to me. “When the fuck did this happen?” I said as I tried to sit up some.

Gunner gave Victoria a dirty look. “Shut the fuck up, Victoria.” He stood up and walked over toward me.

“Gunner, when the fuck did you sleep with my girlfriend?”

“First off, Josh, Victoria is not your girlfriend. Heather is. It was months before you started dating her, dude. It was one time, and it meant nothing,” Gunner said.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you’d slept with her, dude? You knew I liked her.”

When I looked over at Victoria, she was standing behind Gunner with a shit-eating grin on her face.

“Um, Josh—” Jeff said, walking up next to Gunner.

“Not now, Jeff! Gunner, why didn’t you tell me that you slept with the girl I’m dating?”

“You’re not fucking dating her, Josh. It was over four years ago, dude. You’re with Heather now.” Gunner threw his hands in his hair and let out a sigh.

“Josh—” Jeff said again.

Something snapped in me. “I’m not fucking dating anyone, and I don’t want to date anyone or be tied down to anyone!” I yelled.

With that, I heard someone suck in a breath of air.

“Ah fuck,” Jeff said.

When I looked over toward the door, I saw Heather and my mother standing there.

“Excuse me,” Heather said before she turned and left.

When I glanced at Victoria, she was smiling from ear to ear.

Why do I get the feeling she set that whole thing up?

“Heather, wait!” I called out. Pain shot through my body, and I threw my head back against the pillow, letting out a sigh.

“Jesus, Josh. Next time I try to tell you to shut the fuck up, you should listen.” Jeff turned and followed my mother out the door.

I glanced back at Gunner. “Fuck, Gunner. I’m sorry, dude. I don’t know what the hell came over me just now. It just feels like it’s all happening now and not four years ago.” I looked over toward Tori.

Gunner shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. I’m sorry I never told you about sleeping with Victoria.” He turned to Victoria. “You mind giving us a few minutes?”

“I’m so sorry, Josh. I wasn’t even thinking,” Victoria said.

“Can you just please give us a few minutes?” Gunner said, a little angrier this time.

“Oh yeah, sure. I’ll be back in a few minutes for that breathing exercise, Josh.” She winked at Gunner before she walked out the door.

Gunner closed his eyes and shook his head. “I really don’t like that girl,” he said as he looked at me.

I let out a small laugh. “Victoria is just being Victoria, that’s all.”

“Well, she better not ever pull that shit around Ellie,” he said, sitting back down.

“What did you want to talk about, Gunner?”

“Josh, you need to know something about Heather. I should probably let her tell you, but…” He trailed off, looking down at the floor.

“What is it? Is she sick or something?”

Gunner snapped his head up. “No! Oh god, no. It’s nothing like that. During Heather’s senior year of high school, her, um…her parents both died in a car accident.”

Holy fuck. That poor girl. “I’m all she has, aren’t I?” I asked, feeling tears build up in my eyes. This was the first time in my life I’d even cared about a girl, and I’d just hurt her.

Gunner nodded.

“And my big fucking mouth basically just told her that I didn’t want her as a girlfriend.” I closed my eyes and saw the look on her face when I’d said it.

When I opened my eyes, I turned to Gunner. “I always fuck things up, Gun…always.”

“Elizabeth, let me talk to Heather.”

She nodded and gave me a weak smile. “I think I’ll go have a few words with Victoria.”

Fuck, I hate Victoria.

I caught up to Heather just as she was getting on the elevator. We rode down to the first floor in silence. I followed her as we walked outside. She sat down on a bench and leaned her head back.

“Why did this happen, Jeff? Am I just not meant to find happiness?”

When she looked at me with tears in her eyes, my heart dropped to my stomach.

Shit, this girl can’t catch a break. “Sweetheart, he didn’t mean it. I promise you, he feels something for you, something very strong. He’s just scared of how he’s feeling, Heather. In his mind, he’s this young kid in college, just having a good time. He’s confused, and Victoria threw some shit out there on purpose to confuse him even more.”

“That’s just it, Jeff. What if that’s the life he wants again?” Heather started shaking her head. “Damn it! I’m so damn confused. Do I back off? Do I keep telling him about us? I mean, I want him to remember us on his own, not because I’m feeding him with my memories. At the same time, I need him so much that I…” Heather’s voice broke off as tears began rolling down her face.

“You know what to do. You don’t give up on him. You love him, Heather. You need to be there for him as his girlfriend.” I grabbed her hand and held on to it.

“He told me he wants to start off as friends. I don’t know if I can just be his friend, Jeff. I mean, of course, I will, but…even earlier…shit, I couldn’t help myself. I kissed him!” she said as she covered her face with her free hand.

“Heather, just try your best to do what he asks. If he needs time to adjust to all of this, give him time. Deep down inside of him, he knows he loves you. We just need him to remember it.”

“Yeah…I know. Thanks so much, Jeff,” Heather said with a small smile. “Thank you for bringing me to the hospital to see him. I love you and Ari so much.”

“I know, sweetheart. Let’s head on back, okay? I’m sure Josh is worried that he upset you.” I stood up, still holding her hand in mine.

Gunner and I were quiet almost the whole way back to Mason.

I was still trying to process that he’d slept with Victoria. Fuck me.

Then, I thought back to a party when I’d come close to hooking up with her. Damn. How fucked-up would that have been?

“Dude, I still can’t believe you slept with Victoria. Why didn’t you say something to Josh when he started going out with her?” I asked as I looked over at Gunner.

“Because it was Josh, and I figured he was going to sleep with her and move on. How the hell was I supposed to know he’d end up dating her? Besides, I only hooked up with her once, and I was drunk when it happened.”

I shook my head and smiled. Glad those fucking days are over.

For some reason, I couldn’t wait to get home to Ari and Luke. I glanced over to see how fast Gunner was going.

“I know, dude. I want to get home to Ellie and Alex, too.” Gunner smiled.

“Jesus H. Christ. It must be in your blood. How the hell did you know what I was thinking?” I asked.

We both started to laugh, and Gunner shrugged his shoulders.

“Dude, I gotta know. Where the fuck do you come up with all that sappy shit you throw out there?”

“What the hell are you talking about? I just say what’s in my heart, that’s all,” Gunner said with a wink.

“Okay, dude, like that shit. You just say what’s in your heart? Who says that?”

“I do, and my sappy shit makes your sister happy.” He quickly glanced over toward me with a smile and a wink.

Bastard.

“Did Ellie tell you about the visit with Brad and Amanda?”

Gunner shook his head. “She just sent me a text and said one word—awkward.”

“Yeah, Ari sent me a text, too. She said she pretty much dug holes in her hands with her nails to keep from saying anything to him.”

“What the fuck do you think is going on, Jeff? I mean, come on. Do you really see Brad saying that shit to Amanda?”

“No, but he’s been acting weird lately. All this traveling out of town, and Smitty swears that Brad was with another girl. I mean, he loves Amanda so much. None of it makes any sense, Gunner. None of it.” I looked out the window.

“Dude, I think we need to have a chat with our buddy Brad.”

I glanced back to look at Gunner. His jaw was set, and I knew how he felt. My heart was breaking for Amanda. She was four months pregnant, and her husband had told her she had to hide it and then give up the baby for adoption. Yeah, none of it makes a lick of sense.

Just then, my cell phone rang.

Holy fuck, speak of the devil. I looked at Gunner. “It’s Brad.”

“Hello?” I answered.

“Jeff, I need to talk to you and Gunner right away!” Brad said in a panicked voice.

“Okay…well, dude, we’re almost back to Mason.”

“I just dropped Amanda off at home. I’m coming back out there. Can I meet y’all in a few hours?”

I glanced over at Gunner, and he must have been able to hear Brad because he nodded.

“Sure, dude, just, um…come to Gunner’s house or mine—”

“No. I could tell Ari and Ellie were pissed at me today. I’ll meet you at the main barn. Just give me a couple hours to get there,” Brad said before he hung up.

I looked over toward Gunner. “What the fuck is going on?”

“He must really need to talk if he’s going to drive all the way back out here again,” Gunner said as he shook his head.

“Yeah, he must.”

When I walked into the house, I could smell lasagna. Damn, Ari makes the best lasagna ever.

It was dead quiet in the house. I walked into the kitchen to see my beautiful bride sitting at the kitchen island with her head resting on her arms. The baby monitor was next to her, so Luke had to be sleeping. As I stepped closer, I could tell she was fast asleep.

I smiled as I leaned down and scooped her up into my arms. Snuggling her head into my chest, she let out a small moan.

“Don’t forget the monitor,” she whispered.

I smiled as I went to grab it before heading to our bedroom.

Once in our room, I gently laid her down on the bed. She still had her eyes closed, but a small smile was playing across her face.

“How is Josh? Heather sent me a text saying you were her knight in shining armor today. How long is he going to be in the hospital?”

She just kept asking question after question. Instead of answering her, I leaned down and took her lips with mine.

The next thing I knew, I was taking off my clothes as I watched her strip out of hers.

“I missed you so damn much today. I love you so much, baby,” I said as I crawled on top of her.

“Hmm…I love you, too. Oh god,” she said as I slowly entered her body.

Fuck, she feels like pure heaven.

“Jeff…you feel so good. Please go slow. I need you so bad,” Ari said as she pulled my body closer to hers.

I started covering her with kisses. I stopped moving as I paid attention to only her nipples. When she kept bucking her hips into mine, I smiled.

“Move, Jeff. For Christ’s sake, move!”

“Baby, you told me to go slow…so I’m going slow,” I said as I looked at her and smiled.

The next thing I knew, she was on top of me, and my world was completely and utterly rocked by her. We called out each other’s names at the same time as we both came together.

Life is so perfect when I’m with Ari. Fuck, I love this girl so damn much.

We were lying there, holding each other, for what seemed like forever.

“How long has Luke been asleep?” I asked.

Ari let out a sigh. “I put him down right before you came home. He was being a stinker. He loves Alex, and I think he was wondering why she wasn’t on the floor, playing with him. Amanda played with him so much that I think she wore his little ass out. Brad even played with him…a lot. That surprised me since the fucker doesn’t want kids.”

“Yeah, about Brad…I’m gonna have to go meet him here in a little bit. He called and said he dropped off Amanda and was heading back out to talk to Gunner and me,” I said as I stroked Ari’s hair.

She pushed up and looked at me. “What? They just left a few hours ago. Now, he’s coming back out? What the hell for?”

I shrugged my shoulders. “Said he needed to talk to Gunner and me, and he sounded desperate.”

Ari sat up straight and pulled the sheet around her. “You know, they were both acting so weird. They weren’t even talking to each other. At one point…well…oh shit, never mind.”

“What? Tell me, Ari,” I said.

“Okay, but you’re gonna think I’m crazy. At one point, I swear Brad was high. He went outside to take a call. When he came back in…I don’t know…he was different. I swear, Jeff, he was high on something.”

Running my hand through my hair, I shook my head. “Impossible, Ari. Brad would never do drugs. No way.”

Ari frowned and just looked at me. “I don’t know, Jeff. I would stake a million dollars on it. Even Ells thought he was acting strange.”

Just then, we heard Luke over the baby monitor. Ari got up and started getting dressed. Lying there, I thought about everything Ari had just said.

Brad’s doing drugs? No fucking way.

Sitting on the porch with Ellie, I was holding Alex in my arms while she was asleep. Jeff had called a few minutes ago to tell me he was on his way to pick me up to meet Brad. I had the worst feeling in my stomach.

“Ells, how did Brad act when he was here with Amanda?”

Ellie looked at me with concern in her eyes. “Well, um…honestly, Ari and I both thought something was wrong. Ari swears he went outside and got high, but Amanda told her that she was crazy. He was acting differently though after he came back in from taking a phone call.”

“How did Amanda and Brad act toward each other?”

“Like strangers. She told me she was going to call me later. She’d talked to Brad this morning, and she said things were not good. Maybe that’s why he wants to talk to y’all?”

Jeff was pulling up, so I handed little bear to Ellie before I leaned down and kissed her good-bye.

“I’ll see you in a bit, sweetheart.” I gave her a sad smile. I hated leaving her again.

When I looked up, I saw my mother standing in the doorway. She smiled and nodded as if she knew it was killing me to leave my girls. I was so grateful my parents also lived on the ranch.

“I love you, Gunner. Just don’t beat the shit out of him, okay?” Ellie said with a wink.

I laughed as I turned to walk to the truck. The feeling in my stomach was telling me something was very wrong with this whole picture.

Jeff parked in front of Grams and Gramps’s place. I jumped out and glanced over at Brad’s BMW. I waved to Grams and Gramps as I walked up to the porch.

“Brad inside or down at the barn?” I leaned down and kissed Grams on the cheek.

“He’s down at the barn, but he did come up and say hello. He looks tired. That boy needs to slow down,” Grams said with a smile.

I glanced over at Gramps. The look he was giving me told me he thought it was something different.

As Jeff and I walked to the barn, I could see Brad pacing back and forth in front of it. He was wringing his hands together, and—

What the fuck? Is he talking to himself?

“Hey, dude!” Jeff called out.

Brad jumped. “What the fucking hell, asshole? You scared the shit out of me!” he yelled as he threw his hands in his hair.

He looked like shit, and Grams had been right. He did look tired.

“You want to tell us what the fuck is going on? You told Amanda you didn’t want kids? What kind of game are you playing?” Jeff asked, not even giving Brad a moment to think.

“Oh, fucking son of a bitch. She told the girls?”

“Of course she told them, you douche bag. Why the fuck would you tell your wife that? Let alone, tell her to hide it,” I said.

Bending down, Brad put his hands on his knees.

“Dude, are you going to get sick?” Jeff asked right before Brad started throwing up.

I ran to Dewey’s office where he kept a small cooler of waters and grabbed one. By the time I got back over to them, Brad was crying.

Brad’s crying?

“Oh god, oh god. I fucked up so bad in so many ways. I don’t even know what to do!” Brad called out as he fell to the ground.

Jeff and I looked at each other. We walked over, picked up Brad, and helped him into the barn. Jeff grabbed three chairs, and Brad practically slumped onto one of them.

“Brad, what the hell is going on?” I asked.

As soon as he lifted his face, our eyes met…and I knew. I’d seen that look before when we were in college.

“You didn’t, Brad. You didn’t cheat on Amanda, did you?” I asked.

Jeff snapped his head from me to Brad.

“What? Wait. Why would you even think that, Gunner?” Jeff asked, confused.

“Because I’ve seen this look before. Remember when he was dating Stacy Malloney? He cheated on her, and this was the exact same look he had when he told me,” I said, glaring at Brad.

Sitting down, Jeff stared at him. “Brad?”

Brad sat back and took in a deep breath. “I was at a business meeting in Dallas, and we all went out to this nightclub. I never go out with the guys, but Amanda and I had gotten into a huge fight right before I left. She was bitching yet again because my mother had kept pushing her to work full-time at the office. Then, she started complaining about how my mother keeps giving her a hard time about having kids. The fight wasn’t even about having kids. It was about my fucking mother constantly pushing Amanda. She told me she was sick of my mother. When she said how she’d given up her dreams for me, I just lost it. I told her to stop acting like a bitch, and then one thing led to another, and words were said that shouldn’t have been said. It was the worst fight we’d ever had. When I left for Dallas, I was mad as hell at her.”

“Okay, so you went out because you were pissed at Amanda. Keep talking,” Jeff said.

“So, I ran into a girl I knew from college—Michele Walker.”

“Ah shit, Brad. Your fuck buddy from college?” Jeff shook his head.

“Yeah, Jeff, my fuck buddy from college,” Brad said, glaring at him.

“Go on,” I said. The terrible feeling in my stomach was growing bigger.

“Long story short, she flirted, I flirted, and then she asked if I wanted to go back to her hotel room to get high. I was shocked that she’d even asked, and I told her no. Then, Amanda sent me a text message. Said my bitch mother wanted me to call her. It pissed me off, so I went back to Michele’s hotel room.”

When Brad looked down at the ground, I saw a tear rolling down his face.

Motherfucker. This does not sound good at all.

“You know I’ve never touched drugs before in my life. Y’all know that. But, fuck, we got back to her room, and she started taking off her clothes. She was just walking around in her bra and panties. I wanted so badly to just forget about everything—Amanda, the fight, my controlling parents…my fucking job I hate. So, I took a hit of coke, and it felt fucking great. I was happy, I had a ton of energy, and I didn’t give a fuck about anything.”

“Or anyone,” Jeff said.

Brad looked at Jeff with a weak smile. “Yeah…or anyone. Michele started feeling on me, and for one brief moment, I gave in and kissed her. That was it though. I had the sense to stop myself.”

Jeff glanced over toward me before we both turned to look at Brad.

“By the time I got back to Austin, I felt like such a piece of fucking trash for doing that to Amanda. I needed to forget. I needed to feel happy…like I did that night with Michele. She had told me she lived in Austin, so I gave her a call. Told her I needed more coke, and she hooked me up. I’ve been doing it for the last seven months now.”

“Jesus H. Christ, Brad. What the fuck were you thinking? You need to get help, dude. You need to get off of it,” I said.

I glanced over at Jeff. He was just sitting there in shock. None of us had ever done drugs. We’d even made a pact our freshman year of college, promising that we wouldn’t try any of that shit…ever.

“That’s not the worst of it,” Brad said, tears rolling down his face. “That day Smitty said he saw me with a girl…it was Michele. She’s been harassing me for months, threatening to tell Amanda about the drugs. I’ve bought the bitch so much shit just to keep her ass quiet. Then, I started to realize that something was different with Amanda. I’ve been such a fucking dick to her the last four months, and I didn’t even think that she could be pregnant. To be honest, I’m surprised she’s stuck around. I’ve just been pushing her away because I’ve been so afraid she’d find out about the drugs or that I kissed another woman.”

“Were y’all trying to get pregnant?” Jeff asked.

“Not really. When I came back from Dallas, I told her if she wanted to try, we could, but I never had sex with her. I felt so fucking guilty that I just couldn’t stand to touch her. Then, one night she started asking questions. She just kept hounding me. I had just taken a hit of coke before I came into the house, so I was high as a damn kite. I got so damn angry that I…I…”

“God, please no, Brad. Tell me you didn’t,” I said, feeling sick to my stomach.

Brad instantly started crying again. “I practically raped my own wife. At first, it was hot as hell for the both of us…but then…I think she knew something was wrong with me. She started asking me to stop…but I didn’t. Afterward, the only thing I remember was her lying there, crying. I packed up a bag and stayed at a hotel for a few days.”

Jeff stood up and grabbed Brad by his shirt. “You dirty, rotten motherfucker. How could you do that to your wife?” Jeff pulled his arm back like he was going to punch Brad.

I jumped up and grabbed him. “Jeff! That’s not going to help anything, dude! Calm the fuck down!” I yelled as I pulled him away from Brad.

“You don’t know how many times I wanted to tell one of y’all, so you would beat the shit out of me,” Brad said as he stood there and cried.

After I talked Jeff out of beating Brad’s ass, I looked at Brad. He was now sitting in the chair, shaking.

“Why did you tell Amanda she couldn’t keep the baby, Brad?” I asked.

He snapped his head up at me. The next thing I knew, he was outside, throwing up.

“I hope the motherfucker throws his goddamn guts up,” Jeff said as he sat down.

Brad walked back in and sat back down on the chair. After taking a deep breath, he said, “Amanda hasn’t let me touch her since that night. I don’t blame her. I hate myself for what I did to her. I just need to find a way to get off the coke and then tell her about Michele. I just need more time.”

Brad looked at Jeff and then me. “I got off the coke for a couple of days, but the other night, I caved and bought some. When I got home, I was feeling pretty damn good. I was even going to apologize to her because I missed being with her so damn much. I just fucking miss her so much. But my world stopped when she told me about the baby. Everything hit me all at once, and I panicked. My wife is pregnant, and the only reason she’s pregnant is because I forced her to have sex with me. I flipped out and lost it. It was like it wasn’t even me talking. I was listening to myself tell her that she had to keep it a secret, and she needed to give up the baby. I was so scared and high. I didn’t even know what the fuck I was saying.” Brad leaned over and cried hysterically.

“Jesus. Why the hell would you tell your wife that? Why, Brad? Why would you tell Amanda that?” I asked, trying to make sense of all of this.

“I don’t fucking know, Gunner! Michele’s been threatening to tell my parents and Amanda about the drugs. She said she would even show them the video. I just fucking panicked. The moment I said it, I wanted to take it all back, but Amanda was so devastated.”

“Whoa…holy hell. What fucking video?” Jeff said as he stood up.

“I guess Michele thought it would be fun to tape our little escapade, so she set up a camera and videotaped the whole thing—me taking the drugs and then making out with her.” Brad started shaking his head.

I pulled out my phone. “Okay, Brad, the first thing you need to do is get off the coke, and then you need to tell Amanda the truth.” I was ready to start looking up rehab places. Just by the way he was shaking, I could tell that he needed more drugs.

“After spending time with Luke and Alex and seeing how happy Ari and Ellie are, I tried to tell Amanda today. I mean, I want this baby with Amanda, y’all. I love her. I’ve dreamed of having kids with her since the day I met her. This is not me. When I started to tell her, she…she…”

“She what?” Jeff asked.

“She told me she wanted a divorce, and she would raise the baby on her own. She’s going next week for the sonogram, and she said…” Brad lost it again and started sobbing uncontrollably.

Jeff and I gave Brad a few minutes to get himself back together again.

He looked up at us and took a deep breath. “She told me she didn’t want me there. She saw no reason for me to be there since I didn’t want to have kids with her. But that’s not true! I tried to explain, but she wouldn’t let me. She walked out of our bedroom with her suitcase, and she said she was going to stay with her parents. What the fuck do I do, y’all? I can’t lose her. I love her so much.”

Jeff had been walking back and forth for a while, and he finally stopped to look at Brad. “You love her so fucking much that you told her to give up her child? You fucking deserve everything you’re getting. You love her? Listen to what you’re saying. Listen to the things you told her. You’re a fucking druggie asshole!” Jeff turned to walk away.

“Jeff! Stop.” I got up and reached for his arm.

He pulled it away and turned to look at Brad, who had tears rolling down his face.