Текст книги "Faithful"

Автор книги: Kelly Elliott

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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 25 страниц)

When I heard Ellie scream, I ran into the kitchen, trying to get ahead of that bastard dog of hers. Of course, he cut me off and got to her first.

If he didn’t watch over Alex like he did, I swear I’d…I’d…ah hell. I love that damn dog.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

Ellie turned around and gave me the biggest smile I’d ever seen. I smiled back at her just because I couldn’t help myself.

“That’s so wonderful, sweets! Don’t worry. He’ll snap out of it soon enough. Just splash some cold water on his face,” Ellie said with a laugh.

Reaching down, I started to rub Gus on the head as I listened to Ellie’s side of the conversation.

“Okay. Heather, honey, it’s all going to be beautiful, so please don’t worry! Okay…see you in a bit.” She hung up the phone and walked over to me.

As she kissed the shit out of me, I placed my hands on her hips and pulled her closer to me.

She slowly leaned away but not before she let out a small moan.

“Damn, Ells…what was that for?”

She smiled and scrunched up her nose. “Do I have to have a reason to kiss my husband?”

“No, but I sure as hell want to know what I did, so I can do it more often.”

She laughed and gave me another quick kiss. “That was Heather on the phone.”

“I gathered. I take it from your smile that everything turned out good?”

She started to giggle. “Yep! Except Josh nearly passed out.”

“Pussy.”

“You’re one to talk!”

“I tripped!”

“Uh-huh. Well, anyway, Heather had a bit of news to share.”

Her smile grew, and this time, she began hopping up and down. I couldn’t help but laugh at how giddy she was acting.

“Are you going to tell me? Or do I have to kiss it out of you?”

“Oh! I kind of like that idea…but I can’t wait another second. They’re having twins!”

Wait. What? “Ellie…did you just say they’re having twins?”

She shook her head and started to clap her hands together.

“Oh my god, Gunner! We’re going to have five kids all around the same age. Five! I can’t wait to tell Grace and Emma. I would give anything to see Elizabeth’s face when they tell her they’re having twins.”

“Shit, I’d have given anything to see Josh’s face when he found out they’re having twins!”

She threw her head back and laughed. “Heather told me the nurse had to hold up Josh, so he wouldn’t fall over, and the whole way home, he just kept repeating the word twins.”

“How is Heather taking it?”

Ellie walked over to the refrigerator, took out a few bottles, and started packing them into the diaper bag. “She’s over-the-moon happy.”

The way she was moving around and humming was turning me on. I looked at the clock to see how much longer Alex would be napping for. I slowly made my way over to Ellie and put my hands on her hips. As I pulled her closer to me, she leaned her head back, resting it on my chest. I started inching my hand up her shirt to her chest. When I slipped my fingers into her bra, she let out the sweetest sounds ever.

I moved my lips to her ear. “I want you, Ells.”

She lifted her head and looked over toward the clock. As she turned around, she gave me that smile I would lay down my life for. When she started to lift up her shirt over her head, I took off my shirt and unbuttoned my pants. She pushed my hands out of the way, and then she started to slide my pants down my legs.

The moment I felt her lips on me, I let out a gasp. “No, Ells…I want to be inside you…now,” I said as I pulled her back up. After I slipped off her panties, I placed my hand on her and slowly slid two fingers inside her. Oh Jesus H. Christ, she’s so wet.

“Gunner, please…I want you now.”

I picked her up and walked her over to the other side of the kitchen. Leaning her up against the wall, I kissed each nipple as I listened to the sweet little noises she was making. Then, I adjusted her some before I entered her warm body.

She threw her head back against the wall and moaned.

“Ells…you feel so damn good, baby.”

“Oh god, yes…Drew.”

I began moving faster and harder as she held on. She started to say how close she was, and just as I was about to come, the doorbell rang.

I instantly stopped moving.

“No! No, no, no, no! Fuck! Gunner, no, please don’t stop.”

“Ells, someone’s at the door.”

She grabbed my hair and pulled my lips to hers as she tried to move herself against me. “Move, Gunner. Fuck! I was so damn close!” she said against my mouth.

Then, I heard the one thing I would never want to hear while my dick was inside my wife.

Gramps came walking into the house as he called out for us, “Drew? Ellie?”

Ellie’s eyes widened as she whispered, “You didn’t lock the door?”

“Fuck! I forgot!” I whispered back.

“Oh my god, Gunner! Put me down!”

I damn near dropped Ellie to the floor. We both hit the ground and started crawling over to the other side of the kitchen. I heard Gramps’s footsteps getting closer, and by the time, we made it to where our clothes were on the other side of the island, he called out our names again.

“Drew? Ellie? You around?”

We stopped and didn’t move an inch. I put my finger up to my mouth for Ellie to be quiet. Gramps turned, headed back down the hall, and started to go upstairs. I’d never in my life seen Ellie get dressed so fucking fast. After we both began giggling, we couldn’t stop.

Gramps must have heard us because he called out again, “Drew? Ellie? Where are y’all?”

I jumped up and quickly opened the back door as Ellie looked around while she continued to laugh. She grabbed a basket and ran over to me just before Gramps got into the kitchen. I shut the door, acting like we had just walked in.

“Hey! There you two are. Where in the hell were you? And is Alex napping?”

With Ellie still in a giggling fit, I nodded. I knew if I were to open my mouth, I would start laughing.

“Drew, what in the hell is Ellie laughing about? Girl’s got damn tears running down her face.”

Ellie held up her hand for Gramps to stop talking. I just shrugged my shoulders as I did everything I could not to look him in the eye.

“Your dad said y’all were going out boot-stompin’ in Luckenbach again tonight.”

Then, it happened. I went to talk, and instead, I lost it, which caused Ellie to laugh even more.

Gramps just stood there, looking between Ellie and me. He looked confused as hell as to why we were both laughing.

When we heard Alex crying through the baby monitor, Gramps’s face lit up. “I’ll go get her since you two can’t get seem to stop laughing about whatever in the hell it is you’re laughing about.”

Once I heard him walk up the steps, I grabbed Ellie and pushed her against the wall. “I’m going to finish what I started later tonight.”

She instantly stopped laughing as she grabbed behind my neck and pulled me to her mouth. I wasn’t even sure how long we were standing there, kissing, before I heard Gramps clear his throat.

I slowly pulled away from her lips. “I love you so much.”

“I love you more.”

When Alex let out a little cry, Ellie smiled and headed toward Gramps.

“I’ve already changed her, so she is fresh and ready to go!” Gramps smiled at Ellie.

The look on Ellie’s face was pure love.

God, just from watching her move around the kitchen, my heart swells up with so much love for her.

“Do you want to feed her?” Ellie asked.

Gramps laughed and started toward the living room to go sit down. “Hell yes, I want to feed my girl.”

I leaned up against the doorjamb, watching my grandfather feeding my daughter in his arms. When Ellie came up and stood in front of me, I wrapped my arms around her.

Leaning down, I whispered in her ear, “Another one?”

She turned her head and smiled at me. “I thought you’d never ask!”

Just then, the doorbell rang.

“Today is the day for company, I guess,” I said.

Gramps smiled and went back to humming to Alex.

I headed over to answer the door, and when I opened it, I almost fell over as I recognized the person standing there.

Oh holy motherfucking shit.

Ellie’s mom was smiling at me, holding a basket filled with…gifts.

I took a few steps back, turned to Ellie, and tried to smile. “Wait in the living room, okay, sweetheart?”

Her smile faded. “Why? Who is it, Gunner?”

“Ellie, please just stay inside.”

I walked outside and shut the front door behind me. “What in the hell are you doing here? And how did you get on our property?”

Her smile faded for a quick second before she tried to smile again. “Um…your main gate was open, and the young man working on it brought me up here. I hope I didn’t get him into any trouble.”

I looked around her and saw Dewey’s truck driving off. Fuck! I can’t be mad at him. I never told him about Ellie’s mother. “Why didn’t you call first?”

She shook her head. “I’ve been calling Ellie’s cell phone for months, but she hasn’t returned my calls. I’ve been sober for over a year now. I just wanted to talk to Ellie. I know I could never apologize for the pain I caused her…” Her voice broke off as a tear rolled down her cheek.

I almost felt sorry for her—almost. “Mrs. Johnson, I’m sorry you made such a long trip out here, but I really think it would be best if you let Ellie decide if she wants to speak with you.”

She nodded. “I spoke with Sue yesterday. She let me know that both Jeff and Ellie now have kids and…” She started crying and then quickly composed herself. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to cry like that. It’s my own fault. I don’t deserve their forgiveness. I have no right to even ask this, but…Gunner, will you please do me a favor?”

“Of course I will.”

She reached into the basket and pulled out a letter. As I went to take it, I noticed her hand was shaking.

“I also bought some things for the babies. Sue told me their names were Luke and Alexandra.”

I smiled and nodded before I looked down at all the gifts in the basket.

“I’m not trying to buy their love. I just…I don’t know. I just wanted to do something. I’ve been working for a doctor’s office for nine months now. I’m actually going to nursing school. I was in nursing school before the kids’ father left and my world fell apart. I should be done this summer.”

“That’s wonderful…Mrs. Johnson. I’m sorry. I don’t even know your first name.”

She let out a small laugh. “My name is Sharon.”

I held out my hand and shook hers.

She smiled as she handed me the basket. “Well, please let Ellie know that I’m here if she needs…um…well, I know she doesn’t need me. Please have her call me if she’s willing to give me a second chance. I understand that your mother is very kind to Ellie. I’m so very…um…so very happy that she, um…”

“It’s okay, Sharon. I understand what you’re trying to say. Is your phone number in the letter?”

“Yes. I wrote each of them a letter. I do love both Ellie and Jeff. I don’t know that person who treated her daughter with such hate. My husband was my life. I gave everything up for him, and he just walked away from me, like I was nothing. When he told me that he’d only stayed because of Ellie…well, I guess I used that against her even though the poor soul had nothing to do with any of it. I see that now, but I didn’t see it when I was drunk. All I looked for was a way to drink away the pain. Ellie is so much stronger than I ever was.” She shook her head as if she were clearing her thoughts. “Anyway, I’m so glad she found you, and you took her away from me. It was a blessing in disguise. It took losing everything to see what I had.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I just stood there, staring at her.

“Well, good-bye, Gunner. Thank you for your time.”

As she turned and started to walk toward her car, I noticed it had new plates on it.

A few months back, Jeff had told me that his mother had contacted him through his lawyer. She’d wanted to sell their house and buy a condo to get away from all the bad memories. Ellie had wanted so badly to ask where their mom had gone, but she’d avoided the subject, and Jeff had never given Ellie a reason for selling the house. Later, Jeff had mentioned to me that he’d let his mother keep all the equity in the house since it was really her house, but for the last nine months, she had been sending money to his lawyer to pay the equity back to Jeff.

She looked back one last time and gave me a weak smile as I heard the door open behind me. I spun around to see Ellie walking out.

“Mom?” Ellie barely got out.

Sharon didn’t hear Ellie, and she was just about to get into the car.

Ellie called out, “Mom!”

Sharon stopped and snapped her head up toward the house.

“Ellie,” Sharon said as she started to cry.

Ellie grabbed my hand before she started to walk us toward her mother. My heart was beating a mile a minute.

“Ellie,” Sharon said as tears were rolling down her face.

Lord, please don’t let her mother hurt her again. Please.

“Mom? Why?” I asked on the verge of tears.

My mother started to move toward me as she began crying harder.

I tried like hell to hold back the tears, but seeing my mother standing in front of me, crying…I finally allowed myself to let it go.

I must have missed when Jefferson had pulled up, but I could see him now out of the corner of my eye. He was standing near his truck with Ari. I glanced over toward Ari, who was holding on to Luke. She covered her mouth with her free hand as tears rolled down her face.

My mother stopped right in front of me as she began wiping away her tears. “Ellie, I have so much to say to you, and I don’t even know where to begin. I can only ask for your forgiveness. I was in the dark for so long, but I’ve been sober for a while now. I have a steady job, and I’m finally seeing the light. I need your forgiveness to help me stay in the light.”

“Mommy…please don’t ever hurt me again. I need you so much, Mom. Please don’t go.”

She took me in her arms as we both continued crying.

“I promise, baby…I promise to never hurt you again.”

When I looked over at Jefferson, I noticed he was wiping tears away from his face. Leaning over, Ari said something to him. She took his hand and led him over toward us.

“Um…” Jefferson tried to talk, but he had to clear his throat. “Mom?”

Mom turned around and sucked in a breath of air. Jefferson pulled both of us into his arms. After a few minutes, my mom started talking.

“I talked to Sue, and she told me about the babies, and I just…I’m so sorry. I just had to try and come see you. Come see both of you. I’ve been sober for over a year now, and I’m…” Her voice cracked as she looked between Jefferson and me. “I’m so sorry I hurt you both. I’d give anything to take it away.”

When I looked toward Ari, she was smiling and crying, and in her arms, Luke was just watching the whole show. I had to smile. He looked exactly like Jefferson, but he had one hundred percent of Ari’s personality.

“As God as my witness, I promise you both that I’ll never hurt or leave either one of you again. I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I swear to you, I will earn back your love with every ounce of energy I have in my body.”

Jefferson took a step away and smiled at our mom. “Mom…I have someone I’d like for you to meet,” Jefferson said as he reached out for Luke.

“Dada!” Luke laughed.

Mom gasped and started giggling as more tears rolled down her face. I couldn’t help but smile.

I glanced at my mother. I needed her more than I ever thought I did. My heart actually felt like it was finally healing.

Jefferson grinned so big. “Mom, any special name you want him to call you?”

She shook her head as she wiped away the tears. “Whatever he wants!” she said.

“Luke, can you say hi to your Gramma?”

Luke looked right at Mom. It was as if he were looking into her soul with how he was staring at her.

“Well, hello there, my sweet baby boy! You look exactly like your father.”

“I told you!” Ari said with a laugh.

Mom turned toward Ari and smiled. “Arianna, sweetheart, how are you?”

Ari let out a small chuckle. “I’m doing wonderful. Thank you, Mrs. Johnson.”

“Please, sweetheart, call me Sharon.”

Ari nodded. “Sharon, it is!”

“Does he really look like me, Mom?” Jefferson asked.

Sharon smiled and nodded. “Spitting image of when you were his age. He might be just a tad more handsome though.” She winked.

Jefferson threw his head back and laughed, and then he held Luke out toward our mother.

She looked shocked. “Are you sure?”

Jefferson nodded. “Everyone deserves a second chance,” he said as he looked at me and winked.

When my mother took Luke in her arms, I could tell she was fighting back the tears.

“I’m so happy to meet you, Luke.”

I walked up and kissed Luke on the cheek. “Luke, can you say Gramma?”

As Luke stared at her, he laughed, and then everyone began laughing with him.

Then, Luke said, “Mam.”

Everyone stopped.

“What did he just say?” Ari and Jefferson asked at the same time.

My mother started to giggle as she said, “Gramma.”

Luke laughed again. “Mam!”

My head snapped up at Jefferson. “Is he…”

Ari laughed as she started jumping up and down. “I knew he was going to be brilliant!”

My heart started pounding. “I think he’s trying to say it, Mom.”

“Mam!”

I looked over at Gunner and then back at my mother.

Is this all happening? Is my mother standing in front of me with Luke in her arms? Is she really sober…and happy?

“Jefferson, I think Luke heard you calling her mom, so he’s trying to do the same!” Ari said.

Jeff started laughing.

Gunner reached for my hand, and when I turned to him, he was looking back toward the house. I glanced over, and I saw Garrett sitting on the front porch, holding Alex. When Garrett gave me that knock-me-over smile of his, I started to laugh. He must have been watching this entire thing take place. After I nodded, he stood up and began walking toward us with my precious baby.

Jefferson, Ari, and my mom were laughing, still trying to get Luke to say Gramma instead of Mam.

When Garrett reached us, my mother looked at him and then Alex. As she started crying again, my heart broke all over.

She wasted all those years. She missed everything—my wedding, my pregnancy, and the birth of my child.

Jefferson reached for Luke, and I was shocked when Luke started crying.

“Mam!”

Jeff and Ari looked stunned.

“Wow, Sharon. That didn’t take long for him to fall for you!” Ari said with a giggle.

Mom smiled and kissed Luke on the cheek. “I’m going to meet your cousin, my sweet little man,” she said as she handed Luke to Jefferson.

Garrett smiled as my mom turned back to Alex. “Mrs. Johnson, it’s a real pleasure.”

“Mom, this is Garrett Mathews, Gunner’s grandfather. Garrett, this is my mom, Sharon,” I said.

My mother went to shake Garrett’s hand, but instead, he grabbed it and kissed the back. I watched as a blush crossed my mother’s cheeks.

I wonder if my father was ever romantic with her. Did he treat her like Gunner treats me? Or how Jack treats Grace? Did he love her like Garrett loves Emma?

“The pleasure is all mine. It’s an honor to meet you,” my mother said.

I took Alex from Garrett and kissed her on the forehead. As I glanced over to Gunner, I saw him smiling at me with tears in his eyes. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from him. His gaze held mine, and my heart swelled with so much love for him.

He’s my rock. He’s the air that I breathe. I don’t think I could have done this without knowing he would be right by my side.

I turned and faced my mom. The moment I saw her tears, I felt mine. I’m really going to do this. I’m going to open my heart to her and trust that she won’t break it. I glanced one more time at Gunner, and he nodded and winked at me.

“Mom…” I barely got it out. I had to clear my throat. “I’d like for you to meet our daughter. Her name is Alexandra Eryn Mathews. We call her Alex for short.”

My mother allowed her tears to fall like rain. She finally let out a deep breath as she looked me in the eyes. “She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen besides you, your brother, and Luke. Ellie, she’s…she’s…”

“Perfect?”

My mother laughed. “Yes! She’s perfect. How old is she?”

“Almost ten weeks old.” I smiled.

“May I?” my mother asked as she extended her arms.

“Yes! Of course.”

I placed my child into the arms of the woman who had hurt me more than I cared to even remember. At the same moment, the memories of all the times she’d loved me came flooding back into my mind.

I thought of a time when she had taken me shopping for an Easter dress.

As she was putting up my hair, she’d said, “Your eyes are the most magical things I’ve ever seen, Ellie.”

Another time, she had taken me to the park, and we’d chased one another for hours. Whenever she would catch me, she would laugh and tickle me.

At night, she would sometimes read me a love story about a prince who saved the princess from a terrible dream, and then they lived happily ever after.

Oh. My. God. Why didn’t I remember any of this until now? Why has my mind been filled with all the bad memories?

My mom had been talking to Alex, saying how beautiful she was, while I was lost in my memories.

“The story.”

My mother looked at me, confused. “You want me to tell her a story?” She laughed.

“No, Mom. I just remembered the story you used to tell me every night. It was the one about the prince who would come and save the princess from her terrible dream. She was trapped in a nightmare and wanted so badly to escape.”

My mom’s smile faded just a bit.

“Mom…that was you, wasn’t it?”

“Ellie, how do you even remember that? You were so little when I told you that story.”

I looked at Gunner. “Gunner, will you please take Alex for a bit?”

“Um…sure, babe.”

My mother handed Alex to Gunner and then glanced between Jefferson and me.

“Can the three of us go for a walk?” I asked Jefferson and my mom.

“Of course,” Jefferson and my mother said at the same time.

I watched as Gunner, Garrett, and Ari walked into the house. Ari turned back with a worried look. I smiled and nodded. She mouthed, I love you, to me and blew a kiss.

Jefferson put his arms out for my mom and me to take.

We walked a good quarter mile in complete silence.

“Mom, did Dad treat you good while he was with you?” I asked.

My mother stopped walking. She sighed as she looked over toward a tree. “Can we sit down, kids? I have a story to tell you. It’s one I should have told you years ago. Really, I should have told someone years ago.”

Jeff led us over to an oak tree where we all sat in a circle on the ground.

My mother took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I was sixteen years old when I met your father. He swept me off my feet and promised me the world. Of course, it was easy to fall for him. He had your handsome looks, Jeff, and your breathtaking, beautiful blue eyes, Ellie.”

I looked over at Jefferson and smiled.

“All my girlfriends told me how lucky I was to get the most popular boy in the whole school. He played football as the star quarterback. He had big dreams of playing in college and then going pro. We dated all through high school. Our senior year, he was signed on with the University of Texas.”

When my mom glanced at Jefferson, he seemed to stiffen up just a bit.

“Anyway, I was thrilled because we wouldn’t have to leave Austin. My parents didn’t really have the money to send me to school, so I made sure I got good grades, and I ended up earning a scholarship to UT. My parents and your father were beyond thrilled. As a graduation present to your father, his parents bought him a small house close to UT. On graduation night, he asked me to marry him. I’d never been so happy in my life. I was madly in love with him and ready to start a life with him.”

I grinned and looked at Jefferson. “So, you were high school sweethearts?”

She smiled and nodded. “Yes. Your father is the only man I have ever dated or been with.”

Wow.

“Things were wonderful for the first year. I was doing well in school, and your father was beyond happy. He was playing football and getting his degree in engineering. He was preparing to take over his father’s company after he graduated UT.”

Jefferson glanced over at me. He seemed to be putting two and two together…and so was I.

“Then, I got pregnant. I was so happy and so excited, but I was also shocked as shit!” My mother laughed. “Your father was playing in a game against Texas A&M in College Station, so I decided to drive there and surprise him with the big news. I was late, and the game had already started, so he had no idea I was there. After they won, I made my way down to the sidelines where everyone was celebrating, and I saw your dad talking to a girl. I had seen her before at the home games. I’d even talked to her a few times. Angie…she was the sister of another player.”

She stopped talking as she stared out to where the cows were now grazing. She smiled slightly and shook her head. Then, she took another deep breath and let it out. “I was just about to call out his name when he leaned down and kissed her.”

Oh no! Oh god, my poor mother.

“I just stood there like a fool and watched them. It wasn’t just a small kiss. It was filled with passion. I wanted so badly to look away, but I couldn’t. When your father pulled away from her, he looked up and saw me standing there. His smile faded, and all I could do was walk back to my car. I felt completely numb.”

“Ah shit, Mom.” Jefferson reached out for her hand.

She grinned, putting her hand in his and placing her other one on top of Jefferson’s. “He called out after me, but I kept walking away. He finally caught up to me and grabbed my arm. He asked for me to let him explain. I couldn’t even think straight. The only thing I got out was that I wanted to surprise him. I said I had news to share with him. He placed his hands on my face and started kissing me. I was so lost in the kiss and the love I had for him that I just melted. Afterward, he told me how much he loved me and only me and how he had made a mistake by kissing Angie. Oh, he went on and on. I shook my head as I blurted out that I was pregnant.”

“What did he do?” I asked.

“He smiled and picked me up. He kept telling me how happy he was.” My mother smiled and let out a small laugh. “I believed him.”

Jefferson looked toward me. “Mom, did y’all ever talk about this girl, Angie, again?”

She shook her head. “No. He never brought her up, and I didn’t either. He’d promised me it was just that one time, and it would never happen again. Your father had talked me into giving up school for a while, so I could stay home with Jeff. I wanted nothing more than to become a nurse, but he said I could go back once you started school, Jeff.

“Then, one night, I decided to have my parents babysit Jeff, so I could surprise your dad with an evening alone together. We hadn’t been out in so long, and I just wanted to spend some time alone…well, you know how that is. Jeff, you were two years old at the time, and you were so full of spit and fire.” She laughed. “I just needed a break.”

Leaning back, she let the little bit of sun peeking through the branches hit her face. “Considering my last surprise didn’t go over so well, I should have known it was a mistake to surprise him. He was interning at his dad’s engineering office, so I knew where he was. After I dropped off Jeff, I called the office at lunchtime to see how his day had been going, and he told me he was going to be working about an hour later than usual that night. I thought that was perfect. I planned on dropping by the office and waiting for him, so we could go to dinner and maybe a movie. When I got there, the security officer let me in. The closer I got to the office, the more apparent it became that he wasn’t alone. When I heard laughter—his and a woman’s—my heart started pounding. I opened the door a little, and I saw him in his chair…with Angie sitting on his desk.”

I let out a gasp.

“I had the same reaction! His tie was off, and he was massaging her bare feet. I watched his hand moving up and down her leg. I wanted to throw up. I pushed the door open more and said something about her being his reason for working late. Of course, it was déjà vu. I left, and he ran after me. I couldn’t believe I was so stupid, but at the same time, he was my entire life. My heart was shattered. Again.”

“What happened, Mom?” Jefferson asked.

“He asked Angie to leave, and then we fought like we had never fought before. It just so happened that she was interning there, too, and he said he’d run into her, but nothing else had happened. The more he talked, the more upset I got. When I told him I was going to leave with Jeff and stay with my parents for a few days, he blew up. He grabbed me, and one thing led to another. Before I knew it, he had me on the sofa, and—”

I put my hand over my mouth. “He didn’t force you, did he?”

She had tears in her eyes. “No. I loved him so much. I would have done anything for him…anything to be with him. Later, I found out I was pregnant again. Things were never the same. He grew distant, but when you were born, Ellie, he seemed like he was happy again. It lasted for a few years. Then, one day, he came home, and Angie was with him. He told me he was leaving me for her, and the only reason he’d stayed as long as he did was because he felt guilty for ‘knocking me up with another baby.’ Those were his words, not mine.”

Oh Jesus. I think I’m going to be sick.

“Jesus H. Christ, Mom. He said that to you?” Jefferson shook his head.

She smiled and nodded. “When he left, my world just fell apart. I had no job, no money, and a broken heart. A friend of mine came over one night and talked me into going out. I got drunk and had so much fun,” she said with a gruff laugh. “It was the first time I didn’t actually think about him. Since the alcohol seemed to help me forget, I moved from beer to hard liquor. The only problem was that the hurt turned to anger. I started to blame you, Ellie, for everything. He would show up randomly while you kids were at school. He’d tell me how sorry he was, and then before I knew it, I was sleeping with him.”

She shook her head and glanced up at me. “After you left, Ellie, I realized all the time I’d wasted being angry. I almost ruined your life and that caused me to wake up and see that I needed to be rescued from the hell I was living in. So, I decided I was checking into rehab and making a new life for myself. If I got myself clean, I knew the first thing I was going to do would be to ask forgiveness from both of you.”