Текст книги "Born of Blood and Ash"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 56 (всего у книги 63 страниц)

“Interesting,” Ash remarked, kicking off tiny warning bells. “If the others are aware of this, why would they still be unhappy with you answering the summons? It can’t just be your history with Sera.”

“That is…a complicated question.” For the first time since I’d learned of Holland’s true identity, he looked uncertain how to answer as he stared at Ash. “One that may have crossed your mind.”

I turned to Ash, frowning. “What has crossed your mind?”

He folded his arms over his chest and eyed the Fate. “We have both questioned the methods of how the Fates right the balance.”

“We have.”

“As have I,” Attes remarked. “If anyone cares to know.”

“Well, I’m not sure I believe that it is always the essence itself intervening,” Ash continued. “And I’m sure that is something you’ve thought.”

I had, and it immediately made me think of that damn prophecy and what Keella had shared.

Ash smiled tightly. “We also know the only way Kolis ever had knowledge of The Star was because a Fate told him about it. Of course, it could have been done as it was suggested.”

Delfai had mentioned that Kolis might have used someone the Fate loved to manipulate them into giving him what he wanted. That would be on par with Kolis’s past behavior, but Ash was right. How the Fates—the Ancients—intervened often made no sense. Tension crept into my muscles. There were times when actions to right the balance almost seemed to be in Kolis’s favor, creating another situation that would tip the scales again. Until recently, we didn’t know why they would do that. Now, we knew they wanted to wake the Ancients—clearly, not all of them wanted that, but why would any of them want to do that? That was what Ash was getting at by his question to Holland.

I met the Ancient’s stare. “We know why some of the Fates have been intervening. They want the Ancients to wake up.”

As Saion let out a low whistle, Rhain looked like he might fall over.

“That is a question I cannot answer.” Sighing heavily, Holland sat on the edge of the settee. “And not because I know the answer and cannot say, but because I don’t.”

“It wasn’t a question,” Ash pointed out.

Holland looked up. “You’re right.”

When that was all he said, I drew a hand over my face and briefly squeezed my eyes shut. I knew there were things Holland couldn’t say, and I really had no idea how Penellaphe dealt with the vague non-answers. “So, theoretically, let’s say someone out there wants the Ancients to wake. Why? Because they want to see the realms destroyed?”

“I don’t think anyone wants complete and utter destruction—”

“Even if the destruction isn’t complete, it will be damn near close to that,” I cut in. I mean, look at what I did as a baby Primal.

“I know, but theoretically, some could view the Awakening as inevitable and seek to control it,” he said, then shrugged. “Some could believe it is the only way to save the realms.”

“Why would anyone theoretically think that?” Ash demanded.

“Perhaps those who have been in a deep sleep have lost some of their bitterness. It’s hard to tell if that would be the case, but it’s not impossible.” Holland rested his hands on his knees. “And if not, theoretically, there could be a few who would see the Awakening as a restart.”

“You mean a purge,” Ash corrected.

“One where the numbers of mortals and even the gods are greatly reduced and far more manageable to be controlled,” Holland finished.

“By the Ancients themselves,” Ash surmised. “So, it’s possible that some of the Fates want to return to the way it first was.”

What Ash didn’t know was that the Fates were the Ancients, which made his theory all the more plausible.

“Theoretically speaking, yes,” Holland corrected, and I rolled my eyes. “And the way it first was, wasn’t bad. Your draken can tell you that.”

“Yeah, but look how it ended,” Attes reminded him.

“I can’t even fathom how any of the Fates would want this—would want to take this risk,” I began.

“A theoretical risk,” Holland tacked on.

I ignored that. “It’s…” My eyes shot to Holland’s. “It’s Kolis, isn’t it? All he has done, has caused. That is what they want to restart.”

“Kolis’s actions have cost the realms much,” Holland stated quietly. “And it would take twice as long to undo what he has done.”

“How would the Ancients’ Awakening cost the realms less?” Rhain demanded. “They’re beings of absolute power.”

“And absolute power corrupts,” I tacked on. “Just as it did before.”

Holland nodded. “But those who do not seek power remain uncorrupted by it.”

Ash huffed. “It’s really that simple?”

“Yes.” Holland looked at him. “Even though Primals are not absolute, the power you wield is enough to taint and infect. You both know that, but I do not fear that kind of power ever corrupting Sera.”

I stiffened. “You know that’s not true. It has.”

Ash looked at me sharply, but Holland spoke before he could. “What you did in Lasania was not due to any corruption of power. It was pain, pure and simple. I do not fear corruption from you because you do not want power. You never have.”

I shifted from one foot to the other. “That’s true. It doesn’t mean I won’t be a…a more responsible Primal of Life,” I quickly added as I glanced at Attes and the others. “But I am better suited to be in battles than I am to decide them.”

“It’s not a question of you being better suited,” Holland said. “It’s only what you have experience in. That will change.” He paused. “But you will never hunger for power. Even though those who came before you ruled, none hungered for it. It is not in your bloodline.”

Tiny bumps erupted over my skin as I held Holland’s stare. My bloodline. It started with the Silver Knight. “Is my…bloodline special?”

“Your bloodline was chosen.”

I knew that from what Keella had shared, but it made me think of future bloodlines. Our children. Their children.

Suddenly cold, I shook those thoughts from my head. “What do you think, Holland? Would you theoretically risk waking the Ancients to fix everything Kolis has wrought upon the realms?”

Holland leaned back, running his hands over the thighs of his loose white pants. “I think you know the answer to that, Sera.”

I did.

Or at least I hoped I did and that he believed it was too much of a risk, but I didn’t tell him about our plan for Sotoria. I also hadn’t told him I was pregnant. Of course, he could already be very aware of that, but a tiny part of me doubted I understood what Holland truly wanted. Because he, too, had intervened in ways.

“I know talk of the Ancients is concerning,” Holland began.

Ash laughed harshly. “Yes. It’s concerning.”

“But it is not your problem. Not yet,” he said.

My frown deepened. “That’s real reassuring.”

“Kolis is your problem. Left unchecked, he will continue to shift the balance. Then, what some of the Fates may or may not want won’t matter.”

“Yeah, but if any of them are actively working against us, it is our problem,” Ash argued.

“Currently, there is only so much they can do.” Holland’s gaze moved between the two of us. “Like me, they must walk a fine line of interference because the essence has and will react on its own.”

I thought about Aydun. He had failed to mention the eirini, but he had also seemed to push me toward preventing war. “And what exactly happens if a Fate crosses that line, and the essence decides to react?”

Holland’s eyes met mine. “It would use the eather inside us to destroy us, and yes, that has happened before.”

My heart plummeted, along with any idea of asking Holland if he knew how to keep Kolis weakened and entombed for any real length of time.

Fear rose. “I know you say you walk a fine line when it comes to interfering, but I don’t want you anywhere near that line.” My heart kicked up. “You shouldn’t even be here.”

“I’m fine. As I said, the realms would’ve let me know if I was crossing a line.” His smile caused the stars in his eyes to brighten. “But I shouldn’t linger much longer.”

Another wave of disappointment rose, and I couldn’t stop myself from asking, “We won’t ever be able to spend time together, will we? Like share a meal or just catch up?”

Holland’s smile dimmed, as did the brightness of the silver bursts in his eyes. He shook his head.

I inhaled sharply, closing my eyes. Sorrow swelled in my chest, the weight heavy and aching. When I exhaled, I felt Ash’s arm come around my waist again. “I get it. I do,” I said as Ash pulled me close to his side. I opened my eyes. “It’s just not fair.”

“It does feel that way,” Holland said quietly. “But this unfairness ensures there can be fairness.”

Taking another deep breath, I pushed the sadness aside. I had to, but it was hard.

“I should be on my way to speak with Kolis.” Rising, he approached me and clasped my arms. “I am very proud of you, Sera. Truly.” He looked at Ash, who had become my shadow as Holland let go. “And you. Your father is proud of you.”

“Is?” I felt Ash stiffen behind me.

“You released Eythos’s soul, allowing him to enter Arcadia, and Fates can travel into Arcadia,” Holland explained as Attes sat straighter in his chair. “Eythos has returned to be at Mycella’s side.”

“Oh,” I whispered, smacking a hand over my mouth as I twisted toward Ash.

The line of his shoulders went rigid. “How is that possible? Kolis destroyed her soul, ushering in her final death.”

“He attempted to, and in a way, he succeeded,” Holland shared. “But a Fate intervened.”

“Oh, my gods,” I whispered, pressing my other hand to Ash’s chest.

Ash’s eyes glistened as he stared at the Fate, and gods, if any of his tears broke free, I would sob. Like ugly sob on the floor.

“I don’t understand,” Ash said hoarsely. He folded his hand over mine.

“Neither do I.” Attes sounded as shaken as Ash.

“It is rare for a Fate to intervene in such a way, but your father was well-liked by many of them. Your mother even more.” Holland smiled, but there was a hint of sadness to it. “Perhaps one day I will be able to tell you more about how it was made possible.”

As I felt Ash’s heart pound against my palm, I thought I knew what such an act had brought upon the unknown Fate.

Their own destruction.

CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE

The hem of the velvety robe swished around my slippered feet as I paced the bedroom. Holland hadn’t returned by late evening, and I kept telling myself that I didn’t need to be worried about that. Kolis was the type to purposely delay agreeing to meet with us just to convince himself he had the upper hand. I was nervous about how things would go down, but it wasn’t the only thing that eventually drove me from the bedchamber.

Ash had left after dinner to check in with Theon. I’d felt him return a bit ago, but he hadn’t come back to our rooms.

I was worried about him.

Learning that your mother’s soul wasn’t completely destroyed was good news—happy news—but it was also a lot to take in. To process. And he’d been quiet ever since Holland left.

I willed my heart to slow as I went down the staircase. It had been pounding on and off all evening, and I didn’t think that was good for the babes.

As I neared the second floor, I decided to check in on Lailah really quick. Aios had awakened this afternoon and immediately wanted to go to Kithreia to inspect its current state, but it wasn’t safe for her to do so yet. Phanos’s ships had moved toward Dalos, but that was still too close, and our forces wouldn’t have arrived yet. Instead, she had left for Sirta, and despite knowing that Bele would keep her safe while she was in a vulnerable state, I hadn’t wanted her to go. Bele’s Court was also at risk if Phanos went after her.

Our armies were rapidly thinning as we attempted to protect the Courts. Which meant we would have a battle on our hands if Kolis brought Phanos’s armies to the Bonelands, along with those who’d fled to Dalos—which he most likely would. We could lose more people.

No wonder my heart kept racing.

Exhaling roughly, I walked the second-floor hall, picking up on Attes’s presence. I stopped for a moment and then forged on. Quietly, I cracked open the door.

Lailah rested on the bed, her mass of tight braids lying on a chest that rose and fell steadily. My gaze shifted to the Primal sitting at her side.

Attes sat with his feet resting on the edge of the bed, slumped a little in the armchair, sandy-brown waves tumbling over his forehead and cheeks. He looked asleep. I started to close the door.

“You’re not going to say hello?” Attes said without looking up, the tone of his voice flatter than it had been when I saw him earlier.

I stopped. “I thought you were sleeping.”

“Nah.” Attes lifted his head then. His scar stood out starkly against his paler-than-normal skin. “I’m just meditating. Never tried it before. Thought now was as good a time as ever.”

I arched a brow. “How’s that working out for you?”

“Not particularly well.” One side of his lips curved up. There was no hint of a dimple. The grin was empty. “The whiskey I tried to take from your husband’s office would’ve probably helped, but instead, I was lectured by a Primal significantly younger than me that the last thing I needed was to drink myself into a stupor.”

I probably wouldn’t have stopped Attes, but then again, I had a history of not making the greatest life choices. “Have you slept at all?”

He shifted in the chair, draping an arm over the back. “Yeah.”

I had a feeling he was lying. “Have you eaten? Fed?”

A soft laugh rumbled from him. “I’m fine, Sera.”

“No, you’re not,” I said, and his gaze finally met mine. “I don’t expect you to be. No one would.”

He stared at me for a long moment. “You sound like Nyktos.”

“If he said something like that, he was speaking the truth.” I leaned against the doorframe. “I’m sorry, Attes.”

Thick lashes lowered. “So am I.”

Neither of us said anything for several moments. We both just watched Lailah, which I doubted she would be too happy to discover if she woke up. It was Attes who ended the silence.

“It’s not like I didn’t know what he had become.” There was a roughness to his voice now, and as much as hearing that made my chest ache, it was better than the flatness. “Or that I held on to any hope that he could be saved. I accepted he couldn’t. Knew the Kyn I grew up with and loved was long gone. But you know what I saw in the seconds before I…before I ended him?”

“What?” I whispered.

“I saw the Kyn who sat beside me after my children were killed. Who was there for me when I felt like my world had been destroyed.” His head tipped back, and his gaze went to the ceiling. “That’s the Kyn I keep seeing.”

“Maybe…maybe that’s the Kyn you should remember and mourn,” I said.

“But is that right? Considering everything he’s done?”

“He was still your brother, and you still had good times with him.” I lifted a shoulder, searching for something that felt like the right thing to say. “How he turned out doesn’t erase who he once was.”

Now, it was Attes who raised a brow as he looked at me. “You really believe the shit you’re saying?”

“Well, not for me. I only knew him as the asshole he was,” I admitted, and a wry grin tugged at his lips. “But regarding you and what you know? Yeah, I believe it.”

Attes seemed to consider that, then nodded. “I guess I should be thankful for his attack. Because of him, we now have enough Ancient bones.”

Ash, Nektas, Aurelia, and apparently Attes, had raided Kyn’s palace last night with success. “We do.”

“I’m guessing your Fate hasn’t returned yet?”

“No.” I straightened, feeling the ball of anxiety growing.

“Phanos will try to talk Kolis out of it. So will Varus,” Attes said, referencing the once-entombed god I had yet to see. A muscle ticked in his jaw. “But Kolis won’t listen to them. He will agree. Sotoria is his weakness. He’ll risk anything while ignoring common sense and every red flag to get her.”

“That’s what we’re counting on.” I thought of something as my gaze moved from him to Lailah. “If Sotoria chooses to be reborn, will you still go into stasis?”

“Yes,” he said without hesitation. “I have to, Sera. If I don’t, I wouldn’t be in a good headspace to even be around her. If she retains her memories, I wouldn’t be the Attes she remembers. And that’s…” He sighed heavily. “That’s the last thing she’d need. And if she chooses to be reborn, I want her life to be happy. To be good. She deserves that.”

“But you love her,” I whispered.

Attes nodded. “And that is why I will be in stasis.”

Heart twisting, I drew in a breath that stung. To give up the possibility of being with someone just to make sure there was no chance you would disappoint or cause them harm? And he would be giving up that opportunity. I doubted a mortal’s lifespan was enough time in stasis for it to be of any real help. That was true love.

My gaze shifted back to the sleeping Primal goddess. “Do you love Lailah?”

Attes was quiet for so long, I didn’t think he’d answer. When he did, he did so with a question. “Do you think it’s possible to love two people at the same time?”

I thought about it. “I think it depends on the person. Not everyone would be able to, but some could. And probably do.”

His gaze flickered to mine before returning to Lailah. “I agree with that.”

That wasn’t an answer.

But it also was.

Saying goodnight, I closed the door. As I started down the hall, I wished I could’ve said something to help Attes with his grief, but I knew there really wasn’t anything I could say that would heal those deep wounds. They were like mine. Only time would mend them, I supposed. At least, I hoped.

My heart was even heavier, those emotions mixing with the agitation as my pace quickened in my search for Ash, my slippers whispering over the stone. I could’ve just waited for him to return to our chambers. Or, at the very least, put on something other than a robe since I wore nothing but a thin nightgown underneath. But I wanted to make sure he was okay, and, well, I was feeling rather…needy.

I hoped he was alone. I wanted some time with him before we barreled forward with our plans. A few moments where I could be Sera and not a Queen. Or the Primal of Life. Or even a fighter. Where we weren’t on the verge of coming face-to-face with Kolis. I wanted time where I didn’t have to be strong.

Luckily, the foyer was empty. I let my instincts guide me past the hall leading to his office and to the guarded doors of the throne room. What was he doing in there? The guards bowed as they opened the door for me.

“Thank you,” I said, stepping into the dimly lit space.

Only a few of the candles on the walls burned, and it was too overcast for much starlight to come in through the open ceiling, but I immediately saw Ash. He stood on the dais near the thrones. A flutter erupted in my chest, easing the heaviness there as his gaze locked with mine.

“What are you doing in here?” I asked, starting toward him.

“Thinking,” he said, crossing his arms. “Has Lailah awakened yet?”

“No.” I passed the empty benches. “But I imagine she will soon.”

His gaze tracked my approach with a predatory glint that brought a flush to my skin.

“I saw Attes,” I told him. “Since he wasn’t allowed to have whiskey, he’s with her.”

Ash snorted. “If he had the whiskey, the only difference would be that he’d be drunk off his ass while in her chambers.”

I climbed the steps. “Probably.”

“It will do him some good,” he said after a moment. “Being near her, that is.”

I raised a brow, thinking that was the first time he didn’t have something caustic to say about Attes’s interest in Lailah. “Hopefully Theon feels the same.”

A half-grin pulled at his lips. “I think he will, just this once.”

“So, what were you thinking about?” I asked as he opened his arms to me. I stepped into his embrace, resting my hands on his dark-gray tunic. The moment one of his arms came around me, the racing of my heart slowed, and that anxious knot of energy loosened. The effect he had on me was nothing short of magical.

He buried his hand in the hair above my braid. “Our children.”

My brows flew up. I had thought he’d say something about his mother. “I wasn’t expecting that answer.”

Another grin appeared, but this one was almost…shy. “I wasn’t really expecting to be thinking about that myself. It didn’t start off that way. When I wandered in here, I was thinking about my mother and how she is now with my father. I still can’t believe it.”

“It’s hard to believe,” I said, rubbing his chest.

“I didn’t know the Fates could do something like that.” He gave a short laugh. “Obviously, I forgot how powerful they are.”

If he only knew…

“Learning about your mom is a lot to process,” I told him.

“It is,” he said. “Don’t get me wrong. I’m so godsdamn relieved. It’s just that I spent my entire life believing she was really gone, and that I wouldn’t even get to see her when I finally entered Arcadia. It’s like having to rework my brain. It will take a while.”

His gaze moved around the empty space. “And while I was in here, I started to think about how I never got to witness both of them in here. See them sit on the thrones. I only saw my father.”

I quieted, waiting for him to continue.

“When I was old enough, I was allowed to watch any meetings he had with other gods or people who came from Lethe,” he said after a couple of moments. “As we waited for those meetings to begin, I would crawl all over the benches. Run from one to the other. Crawl under them. Only the Fates know why. Ehthawn was younger then, too. Not as young as Reaver, but small enough that he could easily move through the room with me.”

Gods, my heart squeezed as I pictured Ash as a little boy, playing with a draken. And it wasn’t hard to imagine it because I had a feeling our sons would be the spitting image of him as a child.

Our sons?

Look at me, thinking as if I knew for sure they would be boys. But I kind of felt like I did know for sure. I grinned as I pressed my cheek to his chest.

“Anyway, I got to thinking about our children and how they will one day be doing the same thing. Maybe in this throne room or perhaps wherever we decide to stay when this is over,” he said, and my breath caught. “Except there will be two of them, and Jadis and Reaver to chase after them. And…” His voice thickened with emotion, drawing my gaze to his. His eyes shone brightly. “And there will be us. We will be sitting in those thrones, watching them.”

Oh, gods, I didn’t know what to say to that. What he had been thinking about was so unexpected, so perfect, that emotion swelled fiercely.

“Ash,” I whispered, my fingers curling into his stiff tunic.

He smiled, a small upward tilt of his lips. “I love what I feel from you right now.” His hand swept down my back. “It is…everything.”

“You are everything.” I rose onto my tiptoes, shuddering as his cool breath fanned across my cheek.

The touch of his mouth against mine had the same reaction it always did. As our lips met, the realms condensed to just us. There was no one else. No other expectations or duties. No looming battles where one mistake could cause us to lose it all. It would always be like that, and that was a fact I would never be uncertain of.

One hand slipped under my braid to curl around the nape of my neck. He tilted my head, deepening the kiss. A crescendo of need quickly swelled between us as his other hand traced the curve of my spine, charting a path over the velvet of my robe. It ignited a fire as he pressed his hand against my lower back, drawing me closer and leaving no room between our bodies. I could feel him, hard and insistent against my belly, a pressure that sent a cascade of desire pooling at my core.

A certain type of madness urged me on. We were nowhere near anywhere private. Anyone could walk in on us. A draken could fly over and get an eyeful. But I was breathless with desire—with want—for him and only him.

I guided him backward until the backs of his legs met the throne. He sat without protest, looking up at me with heavy-lidded eyes and parted lips. Holding his gaze, I positioned myself atop him, straddling the man who was and would always be my entire world.

The coolness of the stone beneath my bare knees caused my breath to catch as our lips came together once more. It was as fierce as the hold he had on my heart and soul. He kissed me with a hunger that mirrored my own, sipping from my lips as his fingers made quick work of the buttons on my robe. The sides parted, and then, I felt his cold fingers through the thin silk of my nightgown. I moaned into his mouth, and before I could even take another breath, the bodice of the nightgown gave way beneath his touch, tugged down to bare me to his gaze. A shiver ran through me as the cooler air of the room met my heated flesh.

“Beautiful,” he murmured roughly, cupping my breasts in his hands. He dragged a thumb over one rosy peek, groaning as the nipple puckered. “These are so fucking beautiful.”

Ash lowered his head, taking the nipple into his mouth. His fangs scraped my skin, and the sensation was sharp, a wicked sting that spiraled throughout my entire body. His tongue swirled, drawing a gasp from my lips, the sound lost in the vastness of the throne room. He drew the sensitive flesh into his mouth, and my hips jerked, rubbing at the hard ridge of him.

With my heart racing, my hands moved to the flap of his breeches. I wasn’t nearly as nimble as him, and what he was doing with his fingers as he took my other breast into his mouth didn’t help. Still, I managed to free him.

His mouth left my breast, and his head fell back. My fingers brushed the cool hardness, tracing the line of his desire before I closed my hand around him.

His hips punched up, and his hands slipped beneath the robe and gown to close around mine. “I need in you,” he rasped. “Now.”

Dropping my forehead to his, I guided his cock with an urgency that bordered on desperation. The feeling of his cool tip against my heated dampness nearly undid both of us.

He pulled me down hard as he thrust up. The moment he entered me, I cried out, a riot of raw sensations pounding through me.

Neither of us moved for several seconds, our breaths coming in short, shallow pants. I felt him trembling, the same need building in me. I began to rock slowly, wanting to savor the small bite of pain as I stretched to accommodate every thick inch. The fullness was addictive.

Ash’s lips danced across my collarbone, each kiss igniting trails of fire on my skin as his grip tightened even more on my hips, fingers digging in with a possessiveness that sent tingles racing all over my skin. We moved in sync on the throne, thrusting and grinding, our mouths coming together.

The throne room echoed with the sounds of our breaths mingling in the charged air. I rode him, clutching at his shoulder with one hand, the fingers of my other tugging on his silken strands. Every rise and fall of my hips drew me closer to the precipice. One of his hands slid to my ass, his fingers pressing into the softness there with an intensity that matched the mounting pressure within me. The other slipped free of the robe to find my braid. He gripped it hard, tugging my head back so he could see me.

Heat spiraled, coiling tighter, an invisible force pulling at the very core of my being. The striking lines of Ash’s face were etched with concentration. His eyes were locked on mine, witnessing the moment my body tensed. And then, with his name a cry on my lips that filled the vastness of the chamber, pleasure shattered me. It was a starburst, radiating out from the place we were joined, sending shockwaves through every nerve ending.

I shuddered, waves of ecstasy rolling over me as his release swiftly followed. His hold on me became a vise, holding me still as he found his escape. Ash’s head tipped back against the throne, a low groan reverberating off the cold stone walls, filling the room with the echoes of his pleasure.

As the last tremors of our passion ebbed, I collapsed against him. We remained entwined upon the throne as our breathing and hearts slowed.

“I don’t think I will ever think of this throne the same way again,” he said.

I laughed against his neck. “Me, neither.”

His hand smoothed over the braid. “I assume all of that was a pretty good indicator that you liked what I was thinking about?”

“That would be a safe assumption.”

Ash’s chuckle brought a wide smile to my lips. I loved that sound.

Tugging on the braid, he guided me back so there was some space between our bodies. “Are you nervous about facing Kolis?”

“I’m surprised you haven’t sensed my anxiety.”

“You must be getting better at shielding,” he said. “I guess that’s a yes?”

I nodded, biting my lip. His cool fingers grazed my breasts.

One side of his lips curled up as he tugged the nightgown’s bodice into place. “It’s okay to be nervous.”

“I know.”

His gaze met mine when he pulled the two halves of the robe together. “And scared.”

“I’m not scared. I mean, I’m not scared of seeing Kolis. I don’t fear him anymore,” I said, holding still as he buttoned the robe. “I fear losing people we care about. I…I fear failing.”

“I wish I could promise that we won’t lose anyone else, but I can’t.” Eather pierced his eyes. “I can promise we will not fail. We will trap and entomb that bastard. We will give Sotoria her choice. We will ensure that Iliseeum and the mortal realm are taken care of.” Dipping his head, he pressed a kiss to my temple. “And we will have a near eternity of moments like this. You and me. Our children chasing each other around the throne room. We will get to watch them grow and find love. We will become grandparents, and then we will watch them grow.” He cupped my cheek. “All the while, Kolis will be where we put him, and he will stay there.”

I fought back tears. “That sounds…beautiful and perfect.”

“It will be a beautiful and perfect reality, liessa.”

But would it be a reality?

My heart skipped, but I shut those thoughts down and tipped forward, kissing Ash. We would make this our reality.

We had to.