Текст книги "Born of Blood and Ash"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 48 (всего у книги 63 страниц)

“Or because the essence inside you comes from Eythos,” Maia spoke up, her husky voice flat as she nodded in Ash’s direction. “And from him?”

“Not even because of that,” I said, keeping my hands at my sides and open. “However, I’m going to say what many have already thought, including me. Nyktos should be the true Primal of Life.”

A gasp of surprise came from someone on the floor as I felt Ash move, stepping closer to me. Phanos’s features sharpened, and his upper body leaned forward.

“Not because of who his father was or because of some birthright. As someone born mortal, I, more than most, know that birth doesn’t make you worthy of loyalty. Nor does gender,” I said, catching Phanos’ stare. “Nyktos has earned any loyalty you may have felt toward him. He did so through blood and sacrifice. You know him. He’s worthy of your loyalty whether you wish to admit it or not.”

Candlelight glinted off the pearl crown as Maia tilted her head. “He has.”

“But he is not the true Primal of Life,” I said, holding her gaze for a moment. “And neither is Kolis.” I took a small breath. “But you all already know that. Just like you know Kolis earned your loyalty through manipulation and fear. You all know him. And you know he is not worthy of your loyalty.”

“That is blasphemous,” Phanos stated blandly. “As is what you’ve done today.”

“You think this is blasphemous?” We needed to lure Phanos to our side, but disbelief and anger seized my tongue. “Did you not think it was that when Kolis killed Eythos’s wife simply because his brother refused to bring a mortal back to life for him?”

“A mortal he loved,” he argued. “Sotoria—”

“Do not speak of Sotoria.” Eather thrummed through me, and the corners of my vision turned silver-tinged gold once more. “You know nothing of her. And do not even dare defend his actions to me. What he feels for her is not love. It is a sick, twisted obsession.”

From the sky above, the deep, rumbling call of a draken could be heard.

I exhaled slowly, pushing the anger back down. “Was it not blasphemous when Kolis struck out against others in his anger, killing women and men? Children?” I waited for anyone to answer. “No? How about when he stole the embers from your King and installed himself as such?” My gaze swept over those below. “Was it not blasphemous when he snapped the necks of my family for no reason other than to lash out?”

“How about when you killed Embris?” Veses challenged.

My back stiffened. “I shouldn’t have done that. I lost control.”

The throne room went completely silent. No one, not even Kyn, had expected me to say that.

“And I will forever bear the shame of my actions. Not because I killed him. I cannot bring myself to care about him,” I said. “But I regret the consequences of my actions that were paid by the innocent.”

A muscle ticked in Kyn’s jaw when he folded his arms across his chest.

“I was told that Embris was a traditionalist,” I continued. “He did not care about tradition when Kolis stole the embers or when he lashed out at the mortal realm.”

“He did.” Phanos’s deep voice carried through the chamber. “But he was afraid.”

“As if you weren’t,” Kyn mocked.

The Primal of Sky, Sea, Earth, and Wind ignored him. “At that time, Kolis had taken the embers, and he would have been able to Ascend another Primal in place of any he struck down. We all knew that.”

I glanced at Attes. None of us has had much of a choice. That was what he’d said when it came to serving Kolis.

But once the embers faded in Kolis, the threat of death had passed for them, but not for the gods in their Courts, their draken, or anyone they may have cared for.

“Each of you did what was necessary to survive Kolis’s reign. You did what was necessary,” I repeated. The next words tasted of brimstone on my tongue. “I understand.”

“Just as you did whatever was necessary to survive?” Veses asked, her silver eyes pulsing.

My skin prickled all over. Breathe in. The curve of Kyn’s lips didn’t help. “I did what I could to survive him. Just as far too many before me were made to do,” I said, noticing Maia look at the floor. “And I hope each of you remembers all who didn’t survive him, though I fear most of you don’t.”

Maia’s eyes closed.

“Only because they have chosen to forget them,” Bele stated.

“Not all of us,” Maia whispered, lifting her head. Her eyes opened and glimmered. “Not all of us have forgotten. We couldn’t…” She shook her head, then lifted her chin. “You are right. Our loyalty was one born of fear, first for ourselves and then for those we cared about.” Her gaze moved from Ash to me. “That is not an excuse. It is just a truth. One that is the same for all of us.”

“You do not speak for me, Maia,” Veses snapped.

Maia’s laugh was dry, and one side of her lips curled up. “Ah, yes, you have never experienced pain or fear at Kolis’s hands.”

“Would you like to experience that right now?” Veses asked, moving toward the other Primal goddess.

Ash stepped forward and looked at her. That was all he had to do. Veses halted.

“You say Kolis hasn’t earned our loyalty,” Phanos said. “But neither have you.”

“You’re right. I haven’t.” I turned at the waist to Ash. “But I have earned his loyalty. I did so through blood and sacrifice. He knows me. I am worthy of his loyalty.” My gaze shifted to Rhain. His eyes were open. Breathe out. “I have earned the loyalty of those who’ve served him.”

Rhain smiled slightly. “Seraphena has.” He turned to the others. “She’s earned it through blood and sacrifice.” Rhain stomped his right boot.

I blinked, not expecting the clap of his heel against stone.

“We know her,” Saion spoke from where he stood to our left, slamming his booted foot down.

“Seraphena is worthy of our loyalty,” Rhahar said, ending with a stomp, and a thunderous sound of boots against stone echoed from the guards standing at the walls.

“Seraphena earned my loyalty,” Nektas stated, and Phanos looked at him and listened. “She has earned the loyalty of my brethren. She has done so through blood and ash. She is worthy.”

Emotion thickened my voice as my gaze moved to Maia, Keella, and then Phanos. “And I want to earn your loyalty.”

“Sorry.” Veses smiled. “But you’re not my type.”

I got what she was saying. I’d earned Ash’s loyalty—and who knew who else—on my back.

And so had Ash.

His flesh thinned, and tendrils of dark Primal mist swirled around his legs.

“It’s okay,” I said, holding up a hand. “I find her attempts to insult me amusing. Soon, she’ll call me freckled and fat, and everyone will be so impressed by her wittiness.”

Phanos snorted, and Veses’ head spun toward him. “What?” He shrugged. “You have always been terrible at insults.”

Her red lips thinned as she shook her head. “Whatever.”

“How will you earn the loyalty of those who may be in doubt?” Keella asked.

“All I have right now is my word that I will be a better choice, but I know that means little, if anything, to some of you.” Breathe in. “But what you all need to know is that I don’t want your fear. To be honest, I don’t even want loyalty from some of you.”

Veses stiffened. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Elias elbow Thierran.

“Well, this has been an inspiring message,” Kyn remarked, “but—”

“I wasn’t done,” I said.

“Of course, not,” Veses muttered, widening her eyes at her blood-hued fingernails.

I took a breath and counted. “I can assure each of you that I do not plan to do what Kolis is planning.” I looked at Phanos and then Maia. “Before Kolis believed me to be Sotoria, he only knew that the embers of life were in me. He planned to take them, and he would’ve. Do you know what would’ve happened if he had? He would’ve Ascended as the Primal of Life and Death.”

Phanos cursed, and Maia pressed her hand to her chest, turning to Keella. Besides the Primal Goddess of Rebirth, Attes, and Bele, the only other two who didn’t look surprised were Veses and Kyn.

They knew.

“That’s impossible,” Phanos argued.

“It’s not,” Keella said. “It would simply be joining the two Primal essences together, as it was when the Ancients ruled.”

“As the Primal of Life and Death, he would not need any of you. Anger him, and he would simply kill you and Ascend another,” I told them. “He still planned on doing it—taking the embers. He was only waiting until my Culling ended. But he was ready to end every one of you and every mortal ruler who did not swear absolute obedience and fealty to him.”

“That is not the only concern.” Penellaphe turned to face the others. “If Kolis had Ascended as the Primal of Life and Death, he would’ve awakened the ones who went to ground. The Ancients.”

“You all know what will happen if those in the ground awaken,” Keella warned. “It will not be just the mortal realm that burns.”

Most had gone quiet then, left uneasy by the mere thought of the Ancients waking.

Veses stared straight ahead, her features pinched. “As long as the balance is maintained, which Kolis has done despite the fact that most of you would not give him credit for such, the Ancients will stay where they belong. In the ground.” Her slim arms folded over her waist. “Him rising as such a Primal would not change that.”

“But it would,” I said. “No Primal of Life and Death should exist, for such a being would have the very powers the Ancients split from themselves to create the Primals.” My brows knitted. “It would not wake them all, but the shift of power would disrupt the stasis of enough of them that the damage to the realm would be the same.”

“Kolis wouldn’t risk it then.” Phanos’s breath was ragged.

I looked at Kyn. “Would he risk it?”

Kyn only smirked.

“Fates,” Maia whispered. Horror filled her beautiful features. “He could’ve doomed us all—more than he already has.”

“If you feel that our King has doomed us, why have you not said anything, Maia?” Veses shot back. “You have had countless opportunities to speak your mind.”

I hated to admit it, but Veses almost had a point. “Every single Primal in here could’ve said something—done something to stop Kolis.” I could feel Attes’s stare boring into me, and I knew he was thinking about the conversation we’d had while I was in Dalos. “But what would that have gained any of you but punishment and horror?”

“As we’ve said, each of us has had to survive,” Ash spoke, his gaze sweeping over those below. “We are giving you the chance to do more than simply survive.”

“And to do that,” I said, “we have no intention of ruling as Kolis or even Eythos did.”

That got everyone’s attention.

Veses lowered her hand. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I will not be the only one making decisions, deciding the future of the realms and the lives of everyone within them.” My heart skipped a beat. “I will not rule with a Consort at my side. I will rule with a King at my side.”

Phanos’s arms unfolded, and Maia’s mouth dropped open.

My eyes met Ash’s. “We will rule together as King and Queen.”

“Wow,” Veses exclaimed, clapping her hands. “What a novel approach. So groundbreaking.”

I tried counting again. I didn’t even make it past one. “I swear to the Fates, Veses, I am doing everything in my power not to slam you face-first through a wall, but you are really testing me.”

Veses’ red-painted lips parted.

“I strongly advise you to rethink whatever is about to drip from your tongue.” Shadows rose along Ash’s legs as he stared down at Veses. “Seraphena likes you even less than I do. You piss her off, and I will not stop her until she nearly destroys you.”

It took every ounce of maturity I had not to smile as Veses shut her wretched mouth.

“You say you’re trying to be a better person,” Phanos cut in. “Combined with what you’ve already done, that threat doesn’t sound like you really mean it.”

“Seraphena said she was trying to be a better person,” Ash replied coolly. “I did not.”

Phanos stiffened. “Then let me rephrase my question. How would ruling as a King or Queen be any different if only one of you shows restraint?”

“Both would show restraint if you all would shut the fuck up for five seconds,” Attes retorted.

Kyn’s head jerked in his brother’s direction.

“However, unlike them, I have no need for restraint.” Attes looked over his shoulder. “Think about that before you say something to me.”

Kyn’s jaw jutted, and he faced forward, crossing his arms.

Attes smirked.

Keella cleared her throat. “So, you two would rule equally?”

Taking a step back, Ash lifted my hand to his mouth. He pressed a kiss to the top as his eyes met mine. “Yes and no,” he said, lowering my hand and letting go. My heart practically melted. “We would rule equally with the other Primals.”

A hushed sound went through the throne room, and not a single Primal before me didn’t look shocked. They hadn’t been expecting that, and their stunned silence had to be a good thing. It had to be.

Phanos recovered first. “What exactly are you saying?”

“I don’t think any one person should rule all, nor do I believe that two people should control everything,” I said, keeping my hope in check. “There needs to be a…balance. And all of us need to have a vested interest and shared responsibility in all decisions. There needs to be fairness, and I think this is the only way.”

“That is not the way the Courts were established.” Phanos sounded incredulous.

“So?” I said. “Just because it hasn’t been done doesn’t mean it can’t be.”

“But it does,” he insisted. “That’s not what the Ancients intended.”

“I hate to sound repetitive, but…so?” I replied. “There is no law prohibiting such a thing.”

Phanos’s eyes widened as if I had suggested we set fire to all the Temples in the mortal realm.

“Do any of you think Kolis would offer to share power with you?” Ash asked. “True power that comes without conditions?”

“Does serving you come without conditions?” Phanos asked.

I opened my mouth but stopped, shaking my head. “Siding with us isn’t exactly free of conditions, but we would never ask you to sacrifice your people. And I”—I swallowed hard—“I am truly sorry for what you had to give.”

Phanos lowered his gaze, his jaw hardening.

“Nyktos and I are not perfect. I have already made grave mistakes, and I am sure we will make more, but we will never ask you to kill someone who displeased us or punish someone you care for because we’re unhappy with you,” I continued. “We will not slaughter innocents to prove some irrelevant point or assuage some perceived insult. We will not strike out against you because of a difference of opinion.” I glanced at Veses. “We will not seek to humiliate you to assert power or for amusement.”

Veses’ features sharpened until I saw shades of gray beneath her flesh.

“We will not imprison people for our twisted pleasure, and we will not play you against one another.” My chin lifted. “We don’t want a war that will spill over into the mortal realm. We don’t want to leave Iliseeum soaked in the blood of gods and draken. All we ask is that you stand with us against Kolis.”

Silence greeted my words.

“There is just one more thing each of you needs to be aware of before you choose,” Ash said. “Two of you will not get the opportunity to make that choice.”

“Oh, I wonder who those two are.” Kyn barked out a laugh and moved forward a few feet. A smug smile twisted his handsome features. “I’d rather be fucked by one of my hounds,” he said, making Veses’ lip curl, “than swear allegiance to either of you.”

My lips curved into a small smile as I met his glare. I didn’t look away when Ash drifted to the edge of the dais.

“You can go ahead and leave, Veses,” he said.

The Primal Goddess of Rites and Prosperity’s brows flew up. “So, that’s how this plays out? You’re not even going to ask for my support?”

I rolled my eyes.

“No,” he answered. “We already know where you stand, and even if you offered it, we don’t want it.”

She inhaled sharply. “Then why was I even summoned here? Other than you wanting to be graced by my presence?”

I rolled my eyes again.

“We wanted you to know what you could have had.” Ash’s smile sent chills down my spine. “Real freedom. No fear. True power. Now, you will have what you deserve. Nothing.”

Her chin dipped as eather flared in her eyes. “That was unnecessarily rude. I remember a time when you wouldn’t have—”

“You have no idea the effort it is taking for me not to fuck you up.” Essence throbbed hotly, rising with my anger. “So, do not finish whatever disgusting, twisted thing was about to come out of your mouth.”

Her arms unfolded, and her skin thinned again, showing a sheen of gray beneath. “And you have no idea what it’s taking for me not to do the same.”

“Are you out of your mind?” Attes whipped his head toward her. “You’re really going to threaten her?”

“Don’t try to reason with the dumb bitch,” Bele tossed out. “I want to see what happens if she tries something.”

Veses smirked, holding my stare. “I tried to talk some sense into you before. I warned you that you would regret not taking Kolis’s deal. What happened to your family is your fault.”

I stiffened.

“Leave,” Ash ordered. “Now.”

Veses huffed out a laugh and stepped back. Tendrils of mist gathered at her feet. “You all are making a mistake,” she cast out with a sharp slice of her hand. “You’ll see.”

“Veses?” I called out to her. Her narrowed gaze swept to mine. I gave her a smile. “I’ll be seeing you soon.”

The Primal goddess vanished with a hiss.

“Fates, I hate that bitch,” Bele muttered.

Maia laughed and smoothed her hands over her hips. “We are in perfect agreement there.”

“Kyn?” Ash said.

The Primal lifted his stare to the dais, smirking. I waited until his arrogant gaze met mine before I said, “You will die.”

The smile slipped from his face. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

“You sound a lot like Kolis,” Phanos remarked.

“I said I would not rule like Eythos or Kolis. I will not be unnecessarily cruel or brutal,” I clarified. Remembering what Attes had said, I lifted my chin toward Kyn. “But I will not be forgiving to the point of foolishness. What you have done and the things you have aided in are abhorrent. We could never create real change with you at our side.”

Kyn’s eyes narrowed, and he swung his head toward Attes. “What do you have to say about that, brother?”

Attes didn’t turn around, and I knew what he said next must have hurt him. “I have no brother.”

“That’s how you feel?” Kyn sneered.

“That’s what you caused.”

Kyn’s flesh thinned, revealing swirling shades of silver underneath. Mist poured out of him as I held his glare. Some of the tension eased from Attes’s shoulders once he was gone.

Phanos’s gaze met mine and then shifted to Ash. “You’re right. We have all just been surviving,” he said. “But even on the off chance you can force Kolis to abandon his rule, he will not fall in line. You’re a fool if you believe that. He will seek vengeance against everyone who stood against him and those who even considered it.”

I tensed.

“I know you don’t want to hear that, or maybe you don’t like it, but even if Kolis is removed from Dalos, he will not simply go away. He will want retribution.”

I wanted to tell him that simply forcing Kolis out wasn’t our ultimate end goal, but instinct warned me to stay quiet.

“Kolis is too strong. He will fight back,” Phanos stated, and I glanced at Rhahar and Saion. Neither looked happy as the Primal continued. “And he’ll fight dirty.” His gaze flicked to me. “You already know that.” He exhaled heavily and lifted his chin. “I’m sorry, but I cannot swear fealty to either of you or lend my support.”

Bitter disappointment swelled, its weight nearly crushing. We were offering him a chance to rule equally and live without fear. How could he reject that? But I already knew the answer. Fear. All the Primals who remained, and even the two who had left, had borne the brunt of Kolis’s anger in the past.

“Then you will stand with Kolis?” Ash demanded, his voice a cold shadow that slipped over the floor and walls.

“I’d rather not stand with him either,” he replied.

I frowned. “But you won’t have a choice.”

“Not unless he forces my hand. Until then, I will remain on my island and stay uninvolved,” he confirmed, and Saion smirked. The Primal didn’t miss that. “You don’t like my answer?”

“I’m not surprised by your answer,” Saion corrected. “You see, this is not your problem until it becomes your problem. You believe that staying uninvolved absolves you of responsibility for what will happen, but the thing is, Your Highness, doing nothing is doing something.”

Phanos’s jaw hardened as he stared at the god who’d once served him. A moment passed. “Then so be it.” His silvery gaze fixed on Ash and me. “I’m hoping I have a choice and will be allowed to leave, unlike having no choice in coming here.”

I looked at Ash, and he nodded. “You may leave,” I said. “No one will stop you.”

He hesitated, then nodded. “I wish you all the best.”

I pushed down the disappointment. “Phanos?”

The mist rising from his legs slowed. “Yes?”

“You asked me to remember what you did for me when the time came,” I said. “I will.”