Текст книги "Born of Blood and Ash"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 60 (всего у книги 63 страниц)

I stood there, rooted to the floor, the spot on my shoulder where the crescent-shaped birthmark rested beginning to tingle.

“Her shroud will be that of crimson-and-gold and will bear a royal mark,” he said, sparks flying from his fingers as he moved his hand through the air. Faint silvery flames followed, forming a painfully familiar symbol.

The crown of elm and the sword—the slightly slanted sword.

The crown of life.

The sword of death.

But the flames changed, taking on more characteristics of the symbol of death. The crown became a circle, and the sword an arrow drenched in gold and surrounded by crimson.

Wrapped in the shroud of death.

My nostrils flared, and I gritted my teeth.

“She will be a Queen of Flesh and Fire, and she will usher in the end with the name of the true Primal of Life on her lips,” Aydun said as the flaming symbol faded. “Death and destruction will follow her.”

Silence fell then, settling over the chamber. Seconds ticked by.

“This isn’t fair to her,” I whispered hoarsely. “I didn’t want this for her, not after all her suffering.”

“She’ll likely have no knowledge of her past,” Aydun said, causing the three of us to look at him sharply.

“I don’t understand,” Attes said.

“Those who are reborn may have memories of their previous lives, but they often show as dreams or instances of déjà vu,” he explained. “But they almost always fade as who that person has become in their new life begins to take shape.” He paused. “They may be the same soul and look identical to who they were before, but they are not entirely the same person.”

“Well,” Attes sighed. “I guess that is a relief.”

“Doesn’t make it any better,” I said.

“No,” Aydun agreed. “I suppose it doesn’t.”

“Nothing is written in stone.” Ash curved his arm around my shoulders. “Prophecy or not. This may never come to pass.”

Aydun’s head tilted again. “You’re right. Nothing is predestined. There is hope. You may still be able to prevent the rise of the Primal of Blood and Bone—a being who will not only awaken Death and those in the ground but also carry within her absolute power.” His eyes met mine. “And you know what they say about absolute power.”

I did.

I’d said it myself.

“But she will have nowhere near the strength she will grow into when Death comes for her. She, like you, would be a…” He smiled. “A baby Primal.”

I glared at him.

“So, she will likely fall to Death whilst in the process of waking the Ancients,” he said. “And even if she somehow manages to defeat Death, she would be corrupted just as those in the ground were—and at a much faster rate.” Aydun straightened to his full, towering height. “And if that happens, it will take every single god and even those in the ground to bring her down. For she will destroy all of us.”

Aydun was wrong, though.

He was wrong.

The corners of my lips curved up.

He frowned, and Ash sent me a questioning look.

“I’m not sure why you’re smiling,” Attes muttered.

“Is that all?” I asked.

For a moment, the Ancient looked uncertain, and then he, too, smiled faintly. “It is.”

“Why is it now just hitting me that you are with child?” Attes murmured from where he sat across from Ash and me. We’d come upstairs and ended up in what appeared to be Attes’s office.

There were no empty shelves on his walls. Just a shit ton of weapons.

I kind of liked it.

“With two,” Attes corrected, blinking rapidly. “Congratulations—” He sat up straight, his head swinging toward Ash. “You let her fight while pregnant?”

“While I wasn’t entirely thrilled with her doing so,” Ash replied, taking a drink of the whiskey Attes had poured for him, “I do not control what she does.”

I raised my brows at Attes.

“Fates,” the Primal muttered, rubbing his hand over his face. “Neither of you is thinking about listening to that fuck of a Fate and…” He swallowed the whiskey, lips peeling back. “Ending their lives before they begin, are you?”

“No,” Ash said.

“Good. You two deserve the joy of parenthood and its horrors.” A brief dimple appeared in a flash of a grin, and I thought about his children. Would he ever have more? “Besides, there are other ways to prevent…fuck, to prevent Sotoria from being reborn.”

“I’m sorry.” I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees. “Maybe we should’ve risked releasing her sooner.”

“You know what would’ve happened if we had.” He lowered his glass.

“At least she is safe for now.” Ash rubbed my back. “She’s not really conscious while in The Star, right?”

I steepled my fingers under my chin. “Not always.”

“Then, to her, it will be as if she is sleeping,” he said.

“Yeah.” I closed my eyes, absolutely hating that Sotoria was trapped in The Star, aware or not. It wasn’t fair. “We should still try to find it.”

“The Fates could’ve hidden it anywhere,” Attes said.

“Or given it to someone.” I thought about what I’d seen around Callum’s remains. “We need to find Callum.”

Ash’s eyes narrowed. “You think the Fates gave it to him? The last I saw of him, he was in pieces.”

“He’s her brother.” And my…well, whatever. I told them what I’d seen before the Temple collapsed.

Ash cursed. “Fucking Fates.”

“Ditto,” I murmured, looking across at Attes. “You were right about there being other ways to prevent her from being reborn. We’re having sons.”

Attes nodded.

Beside me, Ash sighed heavily and tilted his head back, the glass of whiskey resting on his knee. “I know what you are thinking.”

I pressed my lips together. Ash had envisioned our sons scrambling over benches in the throne room, playing with Reaver and Jadis, and then our grandchildren doing the same.

There would be no grandchildren.

I closed my eyes. We would have to ensure our sons never had children. Maybe they would be lucky and would never want them, nor whomever they ended up falling in love with. Not everyone did, and it would be for the best if they felt that way. But if they did want children? I shook my head. It wasn’t right or fair. Neither was what had been done to Sotoria.

“We shouldn’t rely on them never procreating,” Attes said quietly.

“I know.” Ash finished off his whiskey and set the glass aside. “We need to look for Callum. In the meantime, plan for the day that either fate or nature finds a way.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “She will not be born all-powerful. No god or Primal is. She will be vulnerable until Ascension,” he said, each word filled with distaste. “Fuck.”

I stared at him, understanding what he was suggesting. That would be a mark neither of us would bear because I didn’t think we would survive it.

“No,” I said, eather flooding my veins. I had to rein it back in. “If she manages to be born, she deserves to live.”

Ash’s eyes met mine. “I agree. I do.”

“Stop there.” I rose, beginning to pace. “I understand what it means if she’s born. But I also know that doesn’t mean the Ancients will awaken here. And yeah, I am damning the lands beyond the Primal Veil.”

Attes’s brow furrowed, and he looked up at me.

“And if they do awaken here, then we will do everything we can to lessen the damage. And like those before us, put them back in the ground,” I said. “Because I will not be a part of murdering a child or an adult of my blood,” I said. “And I know you would not be able to live after doing something like that, Ash, no matter if it was carried out by our words or hands.”

“No,” he said quietly. “I would not.”

“Neither of us would.” I idly rubbed my lower stomach.

“I’m not going to disagree with you two on this,” Attes said, leaning back. “But there is also the fact that Kolis will wake.”

“And if that happens, I will put the dagger in her hand myself,” I swore, repeating what I had told Kolis. “One thing I’m not worried about is her being corrupted.”

“Is that why you were smiling before Aydun left?” Attes asked.

“Power and consequence come from the will of the beholder, right?” I stopped behind Ash, placing my hands on his shoulders. “Both of you were there when Holland said it. None born from my bloodline hungered for power. None will.”

“Well, at least we don’t have to worry about that,” Attes remarked.

“No. That’s one good thing.” I squeezed Ash’s shoulders. “There is something else Aydun said. She will be born in a shroud. That means she’ll be born mortal.”

Ash’s head tilted back. “You’re right.” His eyes searched mine. “But our sons will be born in the mortal realm.”

Damn it, I’d forgotten what Kye had said, but that wasn’t what I was thinking about. “If the prophecy holds true, she won’t be born until a long time from now, and the whole born of the same misdeeds thing? I have a feeling she will believe herself to be mortal. That she will be surrounded by them.” Letting go of Ash’s shoulders, I walked around the couch and sat beside him. “Maybe I’m completely wrong about that, but Aydun said she would call the name of the true Primal of Life.”

The skin between Ash’s brows creased. “He did.”

“Then we need to make sure no mortals know who the true Primal of Life is.”

He stiffened. “Sera—”

“They can believe it is you. I will be known as the Consort or whatever,” I said in a rush. “If my name isn’t known, she cannot speak it.”

“We don’t even know what speaking your name will do, but it sure didn’t sound like it would stop the prophecy if she didn’t say it,” he argued.

“For Aydun to mention it, it has to mean something.”

“Yeah, the same Fate who failed to mention the eirini,” Attes commented. “But she has a point. It could be something small, but it is something.”

Ash was shaking his head.

“The mortals don’t need to know about me. We can have other gods answer their summonses and have Rhain or Rhahar be known as the—”

“It will mean you are never known,” he interrupted, eather piercing his eyes. “And you have lived long enough without being known.”

“I know—”

“I cannot allow that.” His hand cut furiously through the air. “Your name will be known, as well as all you have accomplished and sacrificed. There will be stories and songs written about you. People will celebrate your name. The name that brings others joy. You will not be unknown—”

“Ash,” I whispered, cupping his cheek and blinking back tears. I knew why he wanted to deny this. And gods, it made me love him even more.

“You cannot tell me you will not be hurt by this, Sera.” His cold fingers curled around my wrist. “You won’t only be unknown. You will eventually be forgotten.”

Hearing that did make my stomach drop. I couldn’t deny it. Being forgotten was almost the same as never existing, and Ash understood how much it had hurt not to be known by anyone. How it had made me feel like a specter among the living. But something struck me in that moment. That was then. It wasn’t me now.

“You know me,” I said. “My children will know me. Attes will, and everyone else I care about will know me.”

The muscle in his jaw clenched against my palm. “That isn’t enough.”

“But it is.” I leaned over and kissed him softly, then rested my forehead against his. “You are enough.”

CHAPTER SIXTY-FOUR

Two months later…

Ash stared down at me, his eyes never leaving my face as he entered me with one hard thrust of his hips that shook the glasses and dishware on the antechamber table.

We had just finished breakfast and should be getting ready. The other Primals and gods wanted a celebration, and Ash and I not only thought it was a good idea but also figured it was time. The last several weeks had been for mourning those we’d lost, and this event was to celebrate their memories as much as it was to mark our victory. The event would be at the City Hall, and Rhain was running around like a madman. He would probably have a breakdown if he knew what we were doing.

We hadn’t planned to end up this way. It just sort of happened. I’d stood to ready myself and mentioned that Erlina had made adjustments to the gown I wanted to wear. It had become too tight around both breasts and my lower stomach. The growing bump wasn’t entirely noticeable to the eye, depending on what I wore, but Ash had such a voracious reaction. He’d kissed me, and that single kiss had turned into one that ended with me splayed across the table, my robe unbuttoned, and Ash between my thighs.

“If we’re late,” I said, biting my lower lip as pleasure darted through my veins, “Rhain will be so mad.”

Ash moved slowly inside me, clearly in no hurry. The hand on my hip tightened. “We’ll just tell him we took our time with dessert.”

A giggle snuck free. “Dessert with breakfast?”

“Mm-hmm.” His gaze left mine and traveled downward. He cupped a breast with his other hand. The sweep of his thumb over my nipple had my back arching off the table. A smoky grin appeared. “They are so much more sensitive.”

They definitely were. Sometimes, even clothing irritated or aroused them.

Right now, it was the latter.

Ash’s head dipped. His lips found mine once more, and I tasted cream on his tongue. He sipped from my lips and kept up that slow, torturous tempo with his hips. His mouth left mine, blazing a path over my jaw and then down my throat. He lingered there, kissing and licking until he reached where my pulse beat wildly. I tensed around him in sweet, heady anticipation. After a heartbeat, I felt the graze of his sharp fangs. My fingers pressed into the skin of his chest as the scrape sent a burst of desire through me with only a hint of unease. That was progress.

A lot of progress.

Over the last two months, we’d been slowly working together to overcome my trauma related to feeding. Maybe overcome wasn’t the right word. I’d come to believe that trauma wasn’t always something you could overcome and no longer be affected by. The mind didn’t work that way, be you mortal, god, or Primal. Trauma stayed with you, sometimes returning at night or during the quieter parts of the day. Other times, it disappeared for days or weeks. But I was beginning to live with it. To acknowledge it and then handle it, just like I had when it came to my anxiety. Neither were the sum of who I was. It was just a part of who I was.

Either way, Ash hadn’t wanted to push it at first, telling me we could wait until our sons were born, but it wasn’t something I was willing to put off until then. We still had time before I was too far along in my pregnancy for Ash to be able to feed, and I wanted to share that with him again before the babes came. I wasn’t exactly sure why, but it was important to me. So, Ash had relented. And to be honest, I think he started to enjoy the process after a while. The teasing drags of his fangs, the brief, shallow bites that only drew a drop of blood, had gone from causing me to lock up in dread and shame to something that had my blood pounding with lust and need.

He gave me one of those tiny bites that drew just a hint of blood, then chased it away with his tongue, making me moan. He stilled for a few seconds afterward, like he always did. I knew what he was doing in those brief heartbeats. He was tasting my emotions, making sure I was okay.

And right then, I was more than okay.

I was ready.

“More,” I whispered.

Ash chuckled against my pulse, and then his tongue slid over my skin, causing my breath to hitch. He drew the flesh of my throat into his mouth, wringing a gasp from me, but he moved on.

A hint of disappointment rose. “Ash?”

“Hmm?” His lips danced over my collarbone.

I slid my hands to his shoulders. “I’m ready.”

Ash froze for just a second and then shuddered. “I know you are.” He pushed into me, grinding against my clit. “You’re soaking wet.”

Warmth hit my cheeks. “I wasn’t talking about that.”

“I know.”

“Then—”

Ash moved with lightning speed, closing his mouth over mine. His deep kiss was like a match striking flint, kicking off a shower of sparks. It was possessive. Almost feral in its neediness, and I fucking loved it.

I lifted my legs, curling them around his waist, and pushing up to meet the plunge of his hips. He groaned against my mouth, and a full-body tremor swept through him. My lips felt swollen when his mouth left mine.

“I want you to watch me,” he ordered in a voice wrapped in silk and shadows. He kissed my chin and then the crook of my neck. “I don’t want you to take your eyes off me. Understand?”

I nodded, watching him as the edges of his hair teased the side of my breast.

He halted, his breath cool against my nipple, and his gaze flicking to mine. “I want to hear you say it, liessa.”

My eyes narrowed slightly. “Yes.”

That shadowy smile returned. “That’s my Queen.”

His head lowered once more, but his gaze remained locked onto mine as he took the peak of my breast into his mouth. The graze of his fangs against my soft flesh sent desire streaking through me. He drew the turgid peak into his mouth, and even if he hadn’t ordered me, I wouldn’t have been able to look away. His tongue swirled over the hardened bud, and my eyes started to flutter shut as I rocked against him. Acute wisps of pleasure spread through me. I was aching by the time he let go.

“Keep watching.”

“I am,” I panted.

“Good.” His hair teased my skin as he moved to my left breast. His tongue traveled up the swell. “Whose mouth is on you?”

I blinked. “Yours.”

He nipped at the skin.

“My King?”

Ash caught my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. I cried out, back bowing, and his grin was downright wicked. “I want you to say my name.”

My legs tightened around him, and our eyes locked once more. An aching pressure settled in my chest and between my thighs. “Nyktos.”

His growl rumbled through me.

I grinned. “Ash.”

He showed his approval with a flick of his tongue. “And whose cock is inside you?”

My heart was pounding so fast. “Ash—” He struck before I could even finish saying his name.

Ash pierced the skin of my breast right above my nipple. His gaze still holding mine, I cried out. My hands flew to his hair as the sharp burst of pain momentarily overwhelmed my senses, stroking that fear I fought so hard to deal with, but…

But it was his quicksilver eyes that held mine.

It was Ash’s fangs that had pierced my vein. It was Ash’s lips and mouth that moved hungrily. It was Ash’s throat that swallowed greedily. It was Ash who drank from me. His cock still deep inside me. It was his name that I had called out when his fangs sank into me.

And it was his name I shouted again as the pain quickly gave way to pleasure, but it…it felt different, causing my thoughts to run together chaotically. It had been so long since I’d felt his bite, but even then, I knew this was different. Stronger. He groaned, continuing to drink from me. Eather whirled through his eyes, and his pupils dilated. It had also been too long since he’d tasted more than a drop of my blood.

The steady drag and pull of Ash taking my blood into himself was the kind of ecstasy that was as fierce as a current of eather coursing through me, consuming every sense with searing intensity and leaving no room to think of anything, let alone feel anything but his mouth and the decadent agony he unleashed. I came apart without warning, my back arching. I held his mouth to my breast.

The sound that came from him was animalistic. My grip loosened. His hips moved faster, each thrust deeper and harder as he drank from me. And his gaze—his beautiful silver eyes—remained locked on mine, keeping me grounded. He didn’t look away, not even to blink, until he closed the wound with a sweep of his tongue.

“Sera,” he said, stretching up to take my mouth in his. I tasted my blood on his lips. His chest was harder against mine, and when I ran my hands from his hair over his shoulders, I felt his flesh becoming smoother. “I’m going to fuck you now.”

Ash pulled free of me and lifted me from the table. I caught a glimpse of his shadowstone-hued skin. The moment my feet touched the stone floor, he turned me with one hand on my hip. The other pressed me down until my chest was flush against the table. His hand left my hip, sliding between my cheek and the table so I rested on his forearm. He thrust deeply, all the way to the hilt.

He held himself completely still, his length and hardness filling me as his rough, short breaths stirred the hair at my temple. “You okay?”

“Yes,” I breathed.

Then he moved again, and things…things sort of spun out of control.

Ash reached down, hooking his arm around my thigh. He lifted my leg so my knee was on the table. The angle sent him deeper. He moved behind me, fast and hard, each thrust shaking the dishware even more than before. The way he placed me on the table and his dominating presence held me in place. There was no escaping the plunge of his hips, nowhere to hide from the fire he was building inside me. Not that I wanted to. I reveled in every hard, raw pump of his hips and the slick feel of him. I clutched the fingers of his hand beside my head, the contrast of my skin against the now-midnight hue of his startling. Oh, gods. I could feel him growing thicker, larger as he shifted completely into his Primal form. The sounds that came from me as he fucked me scorched the air. My body started to stiffen, and tension coiled tighter and tighter inside me. He thrust in, his hips rolling and grinding—

My head kicked back, and that tension erupted, shattering into a thousand silken shards. Ash pressed in, holding still as wisps of shadowy eather whipped out, flowing across the table when he roared his release. Something cracked somewhere. I wasn’t sure what it was. The pleasure swept us both up in a storm that rose and fell in crashing waves until we were both spent.

I slowly became aware of something cool and damp slipping over our joined hands. My eyes fluttered open to see a puddle. I followed the streams of water to the shattered glasses.

My eyebrows rose. “Ash?”

“Mmm?”

“You broke the glasses.”

“I did?” He lifted his head from my shoulder. “Fuck.”

I grinned. “I think that is what broke them.”

He laughed roughly. “You okay?”

“Perfect.”

“You are.”

My grin grew as he leaned over me, kissing my cheek. He eased himself from me and lifted me from the table, then turned me again. But this time, he sat.

Ash didn’t just jerk me onto his lap. He slowly lowered me and brought my gaze to his. Once he didn’t detect anything off, he folded his arms around me, holding me close to his chest.

“I think,” he said, his chest rising and falling against my hand, “we need to end breakfast this way every day.”

“Then we will really be out of glasses.”

He chuckled, smoothing several curls back from my face. “Worth it.”

We sat there for a little bit, letting our hearts slow. We needed to start getting ready. My hand slid over his chest as I started sitting up—

I jolted, my gaze going to where my hand rested on his chest. I could feel his heart beneath my palm, beating in a steady rhythm that…

Gasping, my head jerked up. “Do you feel that?”

His half-hooded gaze swept over me. “Your come on my dick? I do.”

My eyes widened. “Oh, my gods, I’m not talking about that!”

“Look at you.” He toyed with my hair. “Blushing.”

I felt like my face was on fire. “I’m talking about our hearts.” I stopped the hand that was wandering from my stomach and brought it to my chest. “Focus.”

His lazy grin froze, and then the haze disappeared from his eyes. He sat straighter.

“They…they’re beating in sync, aren’t they?” I said.

“I think they are.” He swallowed thickly, his voice filling with wonder. “I think it’s because we’re mates of the heart, but…” He trailed off with a frown and then blinked. “This is the first time I’ve fed from you since you awakened.”

Nodding, I bit my lower lip and felt the twinge in my breast as if his bite mark responded to his words.

“It’s like a bond, right?” he said. “I think having your blood is like a final connection, which means…”

“What?”

His eyes held mine, and a slow grin started to stretch across his lips. “I think we’ll find out soon enough.”

“What do—?”

Ash kissed me, parting my lips with a sweep of his tongue. The moment my heart sped up, I felt his doing the same under my palm. The sensation was…it was wild.

“We’ll talk more after the celebration,” he said once the kiss ended. “We need to get ready now since you made us late.”

I drew back. “I made us late?”

“That’s what I’m telling Rhain,” he said, catching my wrist as I went to smack his chest. He laughed. “Be good.”

“I’m choosing to ignore both of those statements so you won’t make us any more late,” I said. “I need to put actual, real clothing on.”

“Please, do.” His fingers tightened around my hair. “I would hate to start the celebration by carving out the eyes of anyone who looks at you.”

I laughed as our eyes met. And gods, what I saw in his stare made my heart skip. It was utter devotion. I clasped his cool cheeks. “How did I get so lucky to have your love?”

“You weren’t lucky, liessa.” Ash’s lips brushed mine. “I was.”