Текст книги "Fading"

Автор книги: E. K. Blair

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Текущая страница: 8 (всего у книги 25 страниц)

"It doesn't feel right."

"Why?" Jase asks.

"Because...it makes me feel cheap—dirty." My stomach is in knots talking about this. I don't want to be talking about this. I never want to talk about this.

Mark places his hands on my shoulders and looks me straight in the eyes. "You aren't either of those things, not even close. What happened doesn't make you cheap or dirty or whatever else you're thinking. It happened, and you have been punishing yourself ever since."

"Candace," Jase adds, "He's right. You can't keep doing this to yourself. You can't keep taking this wound and ripping it further open beyond repair. You have to try and leave it be, and allow it to heal."

"I don't know," I say.

"I'm proud of you," Jase says. "I honestly didn't think you would come out with us tonight. Thought you might back out." He smiles at me, and I lean forward between the seats to hug him.

"I'm glad I came," I say as I sit back.

Mark takes my hand, kisses it, and says, "Think about what we said."

Nodding my head, I say, "Okay."

Mark hops out, gets back behind the wheel, and drives me home. When he pulls up to the front of my house, Jase asks, "You want us to stay over?"

"I'm fine, Jase. Thanks again, guys." I give them both a kiss and step out of the car. When I walk inside, Kimber is gone. I go to my room, strip off my clothes, throw on a pair of pajama pants and a cami, and take a sleeping pill before climbing into bed.

"I hate you!" Roxy shouts, a few octaves above normal, while she teasingly shoves my shoulder. "I love that band! How did you even get tickets?"

"Jase got the tickets from one of his friends," I say as I shrug my shoulders as if it was no big deal that I got to see The xx in a private concert last weekend.

"Man, I need to meet this friend so that I can score some tickets too."

Looking up at her while I'm refilling the coffee beans in the grinder, I say, "You have met him. Well, you've seen him."

"Who?"

Securing the burlap bag with the remaining beans, I tell her, "That guy that came in the other day, the one you said was hot."

Giving my shoulder another playful shove, she says, "You're kidding?!"

"Nope," I huff out as I carry the heavy bag into the back stockroom. When I walk back out, Roxy is standing there staring at me with her hands on her hips and an evil grin on her face. I roll my eyes when I walk past her and continue cleaning up before my shift ends in a few minutes. I can feel her stare when I finally turn around and snap, "What?"

"That's it?"

"Yes, that's it." I turn back around and continue wiping down the machines.

Roxy sidles up next to me, leaning her hip against the counter with her arms crossed in front of her. "Was he there?"

"Yes, Rox, he was there," I say as I continue to busy myself with cleaning.

"You're driving me crazy here. Talk to me, girl."

Turning around, I say matter-of-factly, "There is nothing to tell. We went out, ran into him at Spines, had a drink. There is no crazy story to tell."

I start untying my apron when I notice Roxy eying me with a strange look on her face. "Really? No story to tell," she says as she tilts her head toward the entrance.

I look up to see Ryan walking through the shop, heading to the counter. What is he doing here? Looking at Roxy, I shake my head at her as I make my way over to him.

"You're gonna get an ulcer," I jokingly say, even though I'm a ball of nerves on the inside.

He lets out a soft chuckle as he says, "I didn't come for coffee."

I look at him with slight confusion when he lifts his hand, which is holding my leopard scarf. The scarf I was wearing last weekend that I thought I'd lost.

"Oh," I say as I reach out and take it. "I thought I had lost this. Thank you."

"No, you left it on the table, but you rushed out so fast, I didn't have a chance to catch you."

Looking down, embarrassed about my sudden exit that night, I quietly say, "Sorry."

"No need to apologize."

With my apron still clutched in my one hand, I lay it on the counter and start backing away when he asks, "Are you taking a break?"

"Um, no. My shift is over."

"Perfect timing," he says with a grin. "Want to have a quick drink?"

Before I can decline, Roxy butts in and answers for me. "She'd love to."

"Actually, I..." I don't finished my sentence because I can't think of an excuse fast enough, and I am totally busted. Letting a slow breath out of my nose, I reluctantly agree. "Sure. Let me go grab my bag."

When I walk into the back room to get my purse, I'm feeling very uneasy. Heading back out, Ryan is sitting down at one of the tables by the front window. I walk over and sit down. He already has a drink for me, and as I eye it he says, "Your co-worker said you like hot tea."

Sitting down in front of him, I say, "Oh, thanks. She's actually my boss. Roxy." I sound like an idiot with my voice slightly trembling. I pick up the tea and take a long drink, focusing on the hot, floral infused liquid as it slowly heats my chest. The rain is pouring down outside, and I watch the raindrops as they trickle and twitch down the foggy glass window.

"Did Mark tell you we are heading down to Mount Rainier on Saturday?"

I look up at him and reply, "Yeah, Jase mentioned something like that to me."

"You should come with us."

The nerves I thought I had just gotten under control return. Why is he inviting me to go hiking with him?

"I don't know," I say. "I have a lot of studying I need to get done." This is my go-to excuse when I want to back out of something. But I notice him staring at me with a look that screams I know you're lying.

"Well, if you change your mind, we are heading out in the morning around eight."

Nodding my head, I take another sip of my tea.

"How did you know I would be here today?" I ask.

He grins at me before replying, "I didn't. I just thought I would stop by, and if you weren't here, I was just going to leave your scarf with whomever was working."

"I didn't mean for that to come out rude," I apologize.

"It didn't."

As we sit there in awkward silence sipping our hot drinks, he finally speaks and asks, "So, what are your plans for the rest of the day?"

"I have class in a couple hours, then I go to studio until five o'clock."

"Studio?"

"It's dance class," I explain.

Nodding his head, he asks, "You do that every day?"

"Yep. Two hours a day except for Tuesdays and Thursdays, which are three hours. But I tend to go in on the weekends as well for extra practice."

"That's a lot. When do you have time for anything else?"

Pressing my lips together and shaking my head, I say, "I don't"

"That bother you?"

"No...Why?" I ask.

"I don't know. When do you ever get down time?"

Down time isn't an option for me. The more occupied my time is, the less my mind tends to drift. "I don't. But I love dance, so I consider that my down time. It relaxes me."

Ryan continues to ask questions about dance and school as time begins to pass gently by. When I finish my tea, he notices and offers to get me another. I decline, knowing that I need to head home and clean up before going back to campus. He walks me out to where my car is parked and reminds me to think about the hiking trip the guys have planned. I tell him I will before getting into my car.

Storming out of the double doors of the studio, I head straight to my car, slide in, and slam the door shut. Frustrated, I grab the steering wheel and lay my head against my hands. My heart pounds fast, and I can still here the echoing of Ms. Emerson's hasty remarks in my head: Get it together, Candace! Where is your head at? CLAP! CLAP! Feel it! Come on!

I am so humiliated. I have never been yelled at like that in class before, but I feel like what she is asking for is outside of my control. My feet are flawless, I have no doubts about that, but I know what she's wanting, and I just can't give it to her. Inside that studio is the one place, the only place, where my head is free—where I am free. I don't want to lose that, lose the escape, the freedom, the nothingness.

She hammered me for nearly the entire two hours. I kept my eyes focused, but I could hear the sneers from a few of the other girls.

As I'm driving home, my phone rings from inside my dance bag. Digging through it, I grab my cell and look at the screen that reads: MOM CALLING. Ugh! I decline the call and let it go to voicemail then toss it back into my bag. That woman is the last person I want to talk to right now. Who am I kidding? She is the last person I want to talk to most of the time.

I haven't spoken with either one of my parents in over a month. Thanksgiving is a week away, and I'm certain that's why she's calling me. I'm dreading having to go home and spend time with them. For now, I'll just avoid her, because with the mood I'm in, there will be no way to avoid a fight with her.

Pulling up to my house, I see Kimber's car and Seth's jeep parked out front. I was hoping she wouldn't be here. I really just want to be alone right now instead of having another awkward and tense interaction with the girl who used to be my best friend—who I wish still was.

When I walk through the door, the house is quiet, and I assume they are in Kimber's room. I walk back to my room and begin powdering my pointes. I hang them up in my closet to air-dry before hopping into the shower.

As I am rinsing the last of the shampoo out of my hair, I hear the sounds that are becoming all too familiar from Kimber's room. "Are you kidding me?" I mumble in frustration. All I want is some peace and quiet to ease the stress I'm feeling.

Shutting off the water, I step out of the shower and quickly dry myself off. I throw on some underwear and a white tank top then walk into my closet to grab my black velour sport pants and matching zip-up hoodie. Standing in front of my mirror at my dresser, I shake out as much water as I can from my hair before throwing it up into a messy, loose bun on top of my head. I quickly apply some powder and swipe on my lip-gloss before sliding into my Uggs.

Hearing Kimber and Seth is making my skin crawl at this point, so I throw my sleeping pills in my purse, grab my keys, and get the hell out. I figure I can just spend the evening at Jase's apartment. I really need a little space to clear my head and relax.

When I arrive at Jase's and let myself in, I'm shocked to see Ryan sitting on his couch. I stop in my tracks and stare, unsure of what to say. What is he doing here?

"Hey, is everything all right?" I hear Jase ask from the kitchen.

I turn my head away from Ryan and focus on Jase. Taking a few steps further into the apartment, I respond, "Umm, yeah...I mean no." I'm stumbling over my words like an idiot, but I am so caught off guard that Ryan is here. And then realizing that it wasn't but a few minutes ago I was in the shower and here I stand with my wet hair that's tied up in a hair tie is making my head swirl.

Jase walks around the bar with a couple bottles of beer and heads over to the couch to hand one to Ryan. "What's that mean?" he asks.

"Nothing, never mind." I let out a deep sigh and walk over to take a seat in the oversized chair that is next to the couch. I flop down and lean my head back. "I didn't know you would have company, or I would have called or something."

Laughing, Jase says, "Candace, I gave you a key so you wouldn't have to call. You can come over whenever."

"You okay?" Ryan asks me.

I turn my head to look at him, then back at Jase, whom I know is wondering the same thing. "I don't want to talk about it," I say as I shift my eyes to the TV, which is playing SportsCenter. "Where's Mark?" I ask as I continue to zone out on the football highlights that are currently playing.

"He's finishing up rehearsals with the band. He should be here shortly, then we are heading out to Malone's to shoot some pool and chill," Jase says. His cell begins to ring and when he answers it, he grabs his jacket and excuses himself to the balcony.

"So, I take it the rest of your day didn't go well?" Ryan asks.

Looking over at him, I say, "Not exactly."

Even though I was extremely uncomfortable the other night at Spines, I'm feeling a little more at ease after hanging out with him this afternoon at work.

"Don't want to talk about it?"

I shake my head and turn my attention back to the TV when Jase walks back in.

"Who was that?" I ask

"Just Mark. He's heading over now."

"Hey, did you get a chance to think about Saturday?" Ryan asks. When I look over at him he is taking a sip of his beer.

"Saturday?" Jase questions.

"Yeah, I asked her to come with us."

I wish he wouldn't have brought this up because I know Jase will hound me until I say yes. He is on a mission to get me out more.

"Oh yeah? You coming?" Jase asks me.

Eying him, I say, "I have a lot of studying to do before finals."

"Please, we both know you are way ahead in all your classes," Jase says. "You should come. We are hiking up to the Tolmie Peak Lookout."

Not wanting to argue with Jase in front of Ryan and make him wonder why I am so anti-social, I appease him with a simple, "Fine."

When I look up at Jase, he has a big grin across his face, and I shake my head at him. Honestly, I don't really feel uneasy about going hiking. It's November, so there more than likely won't be too many people there, and it's not that often that I go to Mount Rainier. I went over the summer to go running a few times. I have never hiked to this particular lookout, but I have heard that the peak has an amazing view of the Sound.

I hear my phone ring from my purse that is sitting on the floor next to me. Reaching down, I pick it up and see that it's my mother again. I hit decline as I did when she called earlier and toss it back in my purse.

When I look up at Jase, he is giving me a questioning look, so I go ahead and answer his unspoken curiosity. "My mother."

By the time Mark arrives, I am ready for sleep. Having been at work this morning by six, I'm exhausted. As the guys get ready to leave, I ask Mark, "Do you mind if I stay here tonight?" I feel like I need to ask Mark most of the time instead of Jase because Jase will never tell me no.

"Of course not. I was going to go back home anyway. Thursdays are early days for me, so it's better if I'm not here," he explains.

As I nod my head, he gives me a long hug, knowing that something must be bothering me or I'd just go back to my house. When we pull apart, I catch a glimpse of Ryan over his shoulder, and he is watching me with a curious look on his face. He's probably wondering why I have a key to Jase's place and why I'm sleeping here tonight. I'm sure it must look weird to him, but for me, this is my normal.

Throwing an extra set of clothes into my bag, along with a few toiletries, I go to my closet and grab my black hiking boots. It's another chilly and misty grey day, but that is nothing new for this time of year, and it doesn't stop people from being outdoors either. The plan is to hit a few of the trails before hiking up to Tolmie Peak. Afterwards, we are going to hang out at Mark's house for pizza and beer.

Today feels a little strange for me. I haven't gone out like this since this past summer. But, it also feels nice, and it is keeping my mind busy and focused. I've been warming up to Ryan as well. He blends nicely with Jase, Mark, and I. Last night, Ryan ended up hanging out with us over at Jase's. We just laid low and watched a series of 'Ridiculousness' reruns on MTV. It felt nice to laugh like that. I honestly can't remember the last time I laughed so much. Last night, even if it was just for a moment, I felt a little normal—and it felt good.

When I pull into Mark's driveway, all three guys are tossing their shoes and backpacks into the back of Mark's white Range Rover. I grab my bags, step out of the car, and lock it before walking over to Mark.

"Hey, Candace," he says as he pulls me in for a hug.

"Hey, here's my backpack," I say, and I hand it to him to put in the car. Holding up my other bag, which has an extra set of clothes and toiletries, I say, "I'm just going to run this inside and leave it in your room."

"Sounds good."

Saying 'hi' to Jase and Ryan, I walk inside the house to drop my bag in Mark's room so that I can shower and change when we get back. When I make my way into the kitchen, I run into Ryan.

"Hey," I say as he is pulling out several bottles of water. "Can you grab me one of those?"

"Yeah, here you go," he says as he walks over and hands me one.

"Thanks."

"No problem. So, are you ready?"

"Yep. I haven't been out to Rainier since this past summer," I say and then I open my water and take a sip.

"I didn't know you liked to hike."

"I like most things athletic, although the majority of that is inside the confines of the ballet studio. I mainly just run the trails there, but I've been hiking a few times as well."

Picking up the waters, he says, "You're a runner too? I'm impressed," while walking towards the door. I walk over and open the door for him when he says, "You should come running with Mark and I sometime. We've been going early Tuesday mornings before hitting the gym."

We walk out, and Ryan tosses the waters into the car. I still haven't responded when he questions, "What do you think?"

I look down before looking back at him. "I haven't been out running in a while. I'd probably just slow you guys down. It was always something I did alone anyway."

Jase comes up to me, puts his arm around my shoulder, and asks, "What do you do alone? Besides everything."

I elbow him gently in the ribs and smile as I walk around the car and hop in the back seat. "I'm ready to go," I teasingly announce before closing the door and putting on my seatbelt.

Ryan gets in the front with Mark, and Jase slides in next to me. For most of the two-hour drive, the guys talk amongst themselves as I doze in and out of sleep. I have been spending a lot of overtime in the studio, and last night I was there pretty late, so I didn't get much rest.

When my body suddenly jerks out of a restless sleep, and I gasp in a loud breath, all eyes turn to me, but Ryan's are the only ones filled with questions. Mark turns around and starts talking to Ryan to take the attention off of me while Jase undoes his seatbelt and slides up next to me, wrapping his arm around my neck. Resting my head on his shoulder, he whispers in my ear, "You okay?"

I nod my head, close my eyes, and concentrate on my breathing. I feel embarrassed, and attempt to force out the thoughts that are creeping through my head. I just want to have fun today. I need to have fun today. For the remainder of the drive, I sit in the comfort of Jase's arms.

When we get to the turnoff, we have to drive about twenty minutes on a pot-holed gravel road to get to the Wonderland Trail that will lead us to Tolmie Peak. When we finally arrive and park the car, Mark opens the hatch, and I sit on the bumper while I tie up my hiking boots. It is lightly raining, and I pop the hood on my raincoat up and over my head. This time of year, the lower trails can become extremely muddy with the increase in rain. Ryan hands me an extra bottle of water to throw into my backpack before I sling it onto my back and wait for everyone else.

Once the guys are ready, we start making our way over to the trailhead. Mark told me the hike should be around four hours. The terrain isn't too difficult to navigate as we start on the trail. We are all keeping a pretty decent pace and Mark is talking about the last show they played at Ryan's bar. I have never been to Blur. Jase has invited me a few times to go watch the band play, but has never pushed too hard.

A couple hours into our hike, the clouds open and it begins to rain. As we continue to trek on, the ground becomes marshy beneath our feet. I start to fall behind a little, but I yell to Jase to keep going and I'll catch up. I pull the hood on my jacket further over my head, so I don't realize that Ryan has stayed back until I almost pass him. Stopping, I look up at him, and he doesn't have his hood over his head. Rain is dripping off the ends of his hair, and it reminds me of the first night he came into the coffee shop with his rain soaked hair.

"You don't have to hang back. You can hike on ahead."

"Don't worry about it," he says as we continue to make out way through the trail. "I would hate for you to fall and hurt yourself and nobody be around."

Turning to look at him, I give him a grin and say, "Thanks."

"This shit's freezing."

I start laughing and agree with him. The rain is really cold.

After about a half hour, the rain finally lets up, and at this point, I am soaked from head to toe. I stop for a moment, take the hair tie that is around my wrist, and pull up my stringy wet hair on top of my head. Ryan walks closer to me. Laughing, he swipes his hand across my cheek, and the gesture makes me a little uncomfortable, until I see the brown mud on his fingers, and I laugh with him.

"You are covered in this shit," he chuckles, and all I can do is shrug my shoulders. You can't expect to not get dirty when you are hiking in the rain.

"Yeah, well, you're covered in it too," I say as we keep moving forward.

We manage to catch up with Jase and Mark near the incline to the peak. It's a mile hike up, and there is a light dusting of snow throughout the trek. When we reach the top, I climb the stairs to the lookout house and take in the view. I look out at the Sound and just stare. It's a breathtaking view. I walk back around the lookout, sit on the stairs, and grab a protein bar out of my backpack. Jase sits down behind me and kisses the top of my head. I look down to Mark and Ryan who are standing down below and catch Ryan looking up at us before he walks around to the other side of the lookout.

"Having fun?"

Turning my head to look at Jase, I say, "I actually am."

"Good." He wraps his arms around my shoulders, and I lean back into him as I eat my snack and rest.

"We should start heading back," he says after ten minutes or so.

"Okay."

We walk back down the stairs and find the other two.

"You guys ready to head back?" Jase asks them.

Everyone agrees, and we start the trek back down after we have all taken in the spectacular views. The walk down the peak is a slippery one from all the rain earlier. It isn't long before my feet slide out from underneath me, and I fall back into the mud.

"Crap!"

Reaching out both of his hands, I grab tightly onto Ryan's wrists as he pulls me out of the soggy mud.

"You're a complete mess."

"Yeah, I know," I say with a muddy face and now a muddy ass. I feel absolutely disgusting.

I keep ahold of Ryan's arm until we finally reach the bottom and let go. Jase and Mark are several steps in front of us, apparently lost in their own conversation, and it's not long before Ryan and I start talking about his job.

"So, how did you come about owning a bar?" I ask.

"Just kind of fell into it. When I graduated college, the economy was starting to decline, and I couldn't find a job. So, when I found out that the previous owner of that bar was about to shut the place down, I worked out a deal with him and was able to do a slow buyout."

"You went to U-Dub?"

"Yeah, I graduated back in 2007."

"So, that makes you...?"

Laughing at me, he says, "Twenty-eight."

"What did you study?"

"Business Finance. So, it wasn't too far out of reach that I would come to own my own business."

"You enjoy it?"

"I do. When I did the buyout, I changed the whole place out and created a new vibe for it. It wasn't before long that the business was taking off quicker than I expected. At this point, the staff pretty much runs the place, and I have a trustworthy manager, so my schedule is very flexible."

"Sounds like the perfect job."

"You ever been there?"

Looking over at him and smiling, I say, "No. I don't really ever go out." I shake my head and continue, "I'm sort of a work-a-holic. Jase is always nagging me about that."

"Well, you should stop by sometime."

"Yeah. Maybe."

He laughs and says, "You're full of shit, aren't you?"

"Yeah. Maybe," I say, chuckling back at him.

Still laughing, he shakes his head at me as we continue the hike back.

When we finally reach the car, all of us are a mess, wet and covered in mud. I grab one of the towels that is in the back of the Range Rover and attempt to clean myself off, but at this point, most of the mud has dried and is now a hard, crusty matting on my clothes and face. Not wanting to drive all the back in these clothes, I ask Jase if he brought any extra. He tells me that Mark keeps a bag full of clean clothes in the back for when he goes to the gym. I reach in, grab his gym bag, and pull out a t-shirt and athletic pants, along with a dry pair of socks. I wouldn't think twice about changing in front of Jase, but I tell Mark and Ryan to go sit in the front so that I can change. Mark laughs at me, but gets in the car along with Ryan. I quickly strip out of my soggy clothes and Jase hands me the clean ones. Once I am good to go, I hop into the back seat and snuggle up tightly with Jase to try and warm up.

After everyone has showered and cleaned up, we all sit around the living room and tune into the Washington vs. Colorado football game. Mark throws a few logs of wood into the fireplace, and I go to get a bottle of wine from the kitchen. Mark and I have the same taste in wine, so we decide to share a bottle while the other two drink beer.

"What kind of pizza do you want, Candace?" Ryan hollers to me from the other room.

While I am opening the wine I shout back, "I don't care. I'll eat anything at this point."

As I walk back in with the wine and two glasses, Ryan is on his cell ordering dinner, and Jase is already finishing his first beer and watching the pre-game show on TV. We sit around, talking about our day and begin planning our next hike and the other trails we want to explore.

After a couple hours and way too much pizza, I lie back on the couch and laugh at Jase who has had a few too many beers and is screaming at the TV at a penalty call. Enjoying the entertainment of his theatrics, I hear my phone ring from the kitchen. Before I can get off the couch, Jase runs in and answers it with an obnoxious slur. When I stand up, he is walking my way, holding the phone out and mouthing 'I'm sorry' to me.

"Who is it?" I whisper as I take the phone from his hands, and he quietly says, "Your mother."

I walk out to the back patio when I finally say, "Hi, Mom."

"Jesus, Candace! I have been trying to get ahold of you for over a week. Why haven't you returned any of my calls?"

"Sorry, I've been busy and I guess a little distracted lately." Truth is, I have been purposely avoiding her calls. Thanksgiving is this Thursday, and she loves putting on a show at the country club. God knows the woman would never lift a finger in the kitchen, so for my whole life, every holiday dinner has been at the club.

"Well, your father and I were wondering when you were coming home?"

"Umm...I have a lot of schoolwork to get done, so I won't have much time," I lie. "What time are the reservations for?"

"That's it? You are just going to come for dinner? We haven't seen you in three months!"

Why does she do this? She always wants me to call her and visit her, but when I do, all she does is criticize me. "Mom, I'm really pressed for time, plus I am not sure when I have to work." Another lie.

"Well, that's just great! I had invited the Anderson's over for brunch Saturday morning. Now, I will have to rudely cancel."

My heart skips a beat when I question loudly, "Why would you do that, Mother?"

"What do you mean?"

"Mom! I haven't spoken with Jack in months." God, I hate saying his name. My stomach is knotting up just talking about this. But what the hell is she thinking? Why would she invite his parents over and just assume I was involved with that asshole?

"Well, what happened?"

"Nothing, Mom. We just didn't have anything in common."

"So, you ruin yet another possible relationship. What did you say to him?"

"Of course this is my fault, right?" I yell at her. "You are unbelievable, Mother!"

"I just have to wonder why, at the age of twenty-two, you have yet to meet anyone." Her voice is like ice to me, and I lose it.

"Why does it matter? Why do you even care? I wish you would show as much interest in me as you do my non-existent dating life." My voice is harsh and loud.

"Candace. Please. This is so childish of you to always yell at me when you don't like what I have to say. I'm just concerned, that's all."

"Well, Jack's a fucking asshole! I'll see you Wednesday, Mother," I spit out then hang up before I give her a chance to respond. God, she drives me absolutely crazy.

Shoving the phone in my pocket, I sit down on one of the chairs and stare up at the black sky. I take a moment to quell the tears that are threatening and breathe. I need to collect myself before going back inside. When I do get up and turn back to the house, I see Ryan watching me through the double French doors. He opens one of the doors and asks, "You okay?"

Not wanting to let this ruin my evening, I brush it off and laugh. "My mother's lost her mind, that's all."

"Wanna talk about it?" he asks when I walk past him.

Turning around to face him, I casually say, "Nothing to really talk about." Then I walk back into the living room and lie back down on the couch next to Jase.

"What did she want?" he asks.

"She wanted to know when I would be home for Thanksgiving."

"When are you going to leave?" Mark asks.

I watch Ryan walk back into the room and take a seat on the fireplace stoop. Looking back over at Mark, I say, "I told her I would be there Wednesday night. I'll probably leave Saturday morning." Turning my head to Jase, I ask, "When are you guys heading out?"

"Our flight leaves around noon on Tuesday," he says. Mark is taking Jase home with him to meet his parents in Ohio. Jase has been nervous about meeting Mark's parents, but I know it'll be fine. From what Mark has told us, his family is more than accepting of his sexuality. I am so happy that Mark and Jase were able to work everything out between them because they are so happy together.