Текст книги "Honor and Betray"

Автор книги: Teresa Mummert

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Текущая страница: 2 (всего у книги 8 страниц)

As I made my way to the old strip mall, I pulled in back and sat in my car for a minute, not sure what I was even going to say or do to right this wrong. If all Abby wanted was money, she would have kept my darker secrets hidden. Spreading the word would destroy her leverage. So what was it she had to confess?

I got out of my car and stalked off toward the door, glancing around to make sure no one had noticed me. As I pulled open the door to the club, J’s eyes shot up and locked on to mine, widening a fraction. I glanced down at the women who waited for their male companions to arrive.

“Can we talk?” I asked as I stepped closer to her desk. Her eyes danced around for a moment, seemingly satisfied that she had sufficient witnesses. She nodded once and stepped out from behind the desk. I followed her down the hallway to an open door on the left.

I pulled the door closed behind me, not bothering to lock it. I didn’t want her to be scared, and I had no idea how much she even knew.

“I heard we have a friend in common.”

“Several,” her voice was barely a whisper. I nodded, swallowing hard.

“I need to know what Abby told you.” My eyes met hers, and I knew she could see the threat behind them. J backed up a step before taking a seat on the edge of a small bed against the wall.

“She said she knew Emma and that she was in danger.”

“She threatened Emma?” The anger was boiling inside of me again.

“No. She said you were the danger.”

That felt like a blow to the stomach.

“J, I would never hurt Emma.”

“Like you would never hurt your ex-wife?” Her eyes darted to the door for a fraction of a second, but I caught it.

“Abby is as innocent as she seems.”

“She seems like a frail drug addict on the verge of death.”

“I don’t want Emma to get hurt. I would do anything to protect her.”

The look of concern left J, and the air in the room changed.

“Anything?” Her eyebrow cocked, and she pushed to her feet. I shook my head, wishing to fucking god this shit would end. I knew J was a bitch, but I never thought when push came to shove she would put herself above Emma.

“I am in love with Emma. All I want is to make sure she sees none of this.”

“That could be arranged.” She smirked, and I struggled to contain the anger that was boiling inside of me.

I crossed the room in two large strides, looming over her as I grabbed the hair in the back of her head. I yanked back forcefully, making her look me in the eye.

“You have no idea what you are asking from me. I’m giving you a chance to change your mind. Do the right thing, J.”

She swallowed hard, but her lips quirked in a smile.

“You don’t scare me, William.”

A slow grin spread across my face. “That is your first mistake.”

“Why her?” I could hear pain in her voice.

“It never would have been you.” I spat angrily as I released her hair and turned for the door. “Be home around seven tonight,” I called over my shoulder as I left the room. This place felt claustrophobic, no longer a retreat. I couldn’t get out of the building fast enough.

After I got in my car, I slammed my hands against the steering wheel angrily. I refused to do this to Emma. She didn’t deserve it. I needed to learn to walk away. I needed to cut all ties, but now it was too late. Too many people knew my secrets. Emma had no one. J didn’t give a fuck about her safety. She was jealous of her niece. How could I walk away now?

I had a few hours before J would be at her house waiting for me. Now I just needed a place to kill time. I couldn’t go back home or Emma would want to take me to meet her aunt. There was no way this could work out. I had very few options left. I could give J what she wanted, but where would it end? I could never look Emma in the eye if I did. I was far from a saint, but that would be the ultimate act of betrayal.

I pulled out my phone and dialed Stephen. He picked up on the first ring.

“This is over.” I squeezed my eyes closed, begging for my headache to fade.

“We want the same end game, William. I don’t want any more bloodshed to further our gain. I just want to know that I am safe.”

I nodded to myself. I knew J would not take to being threatened. She wanted one thing. I wasn’t willing to give it to her.

“She doesn’t know anything incriminating.” The crippling pain in my chest nearly cut off my words. I would be sacrificing my relationship with Emma by putting her above me. I knew I would regret it for the rest of my life, but for once, I needed to do what was right.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” My feelings for Emma saved me, and they would be the very thing that destroyed me.

Stephen sighed loudly into the phone.

“I liked you better when you didn’t have a conscience.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that. I liked it better too. Life was easier when I didn’t have to worry about someone else. I didn’t give a fuck about J, and if it weren’t for Emma, I wouldn’t care if she rotted in a gutter. I wished my problem was a sudden urge to care for others, but that wasn’t the case. It was only Emma. It would only ever be Emma.

I let the reality of the situation wash over me. It was out of my hands now. That was the best I could do for her. I knew without a doubt that I would not be able to stop myself from teaching J a lesson. I was not the type to give in to blackmail. It was almost painful to give up control of the situation, but I had to do it for Emma. Stephen was far from a killer, and I knew he would do anything to keep the blood from rising to his front door. I would let the cards fall where they may and hope that Emma and I could move past whatever she might discover.

Hours rolled on, and the sun sank in the sky, sending brilliant colors to stain the clouds. I watched as J left and drove off toward her home. I watched as others came and went from the club. I wanted more than anything to go home to Emma and tell her I loved her. I loved to see the look on her face as I said the words. It made me feel whole, worthy.

I sat in the darkened lot as the street light illuminated the road ahead and replayed the last few weeks of my life over and over in my head. My world was spiraling out of control.

I started my car and drove absentmindedly back to my place. I needed to spend one last night with Emma by my side. I needed to feel her warm skin against mine. Tomorrow was a mystery, and for once, I wasn’t going to try to force the hand of fate.

I opened the lock to my apartment as quietly as possible, but as the door swung open, Emma sat up on the couch, stretching like a cat. I couldn’t help but smile at her as her eyes met mine. I locked the door behind me and tossed the manila envelope from Stephen on the island. Emma stood and made her way around the couch. It was like an invisible magnetic field pulling us toward each other, and I took large strides to meet her.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and lifted her body against mine as I claimed her mouth. I needed to taste her, to be a part of her. She returned the kiss hungrily. I shifted toward the wall and pushed her back against it as her legs circled my waist. My fingers dug into her hips as she panted against my mouth. Her grip mimicked mine as she dug her nails into my shoulders. My lips trailed hungrily down her throat, unable to get enough of the taste of her flesh.

“Tell me you want me, Emma.” I needed to hear her say it—needed to feel the words vibrate in her throat as I continued my assault. My hips ground painfully hard against hers.

“Oh…I want you,” she moaned as she pushed back. I slid my fingers under the thin fabric of her shirt, palming the weight of her breast in my hand. For at least one more night, she was mine. Her back arched farther off the wall, and I knew I was being too rough, but I could not control myself any longer. I claimed her mouth with mine again, forcing my tongue past her lips. She willingly let me in, swirling her own tongue in response.

I reluctantly placed her back on the ground and struggled to unbuckle her jeans with shaking fingers. I slid them slowly over her hips as she reached for my belt. I gripped her wrists and pinned them to the wall above her head. She struggled to press herself against me but I took a step back, wanting to maintain the last bit of control I had. I kissed her cheek and took her earlobe between my teeth. Her body sagged, and I kept my grip firm on her hands.

“Please!”

I couldn’t help but smile. Nothing turned me on more than her begging for me to be inside of her.

“I love it when you beg,” I whispered into her ear, unable to hide my own lust and wanting from my voice.

“Please,” she whispered again, and I couldn’t hold out any longer. My hips pressed back against hers, eliciting a moan from Emma.

“I would do anything for you…anything.” I looked her in the eye, wanting her to understand how serious that statement was.

She nodded as her mouth found mine again. I grabbed her shirt, pulling it over her head and tossing it to the floor. She only wore a pair of yellow cotton panties, and I wanted to rip them from her with my teeth. A growl rose from my chest at the thought of being the only man to have touched her flesh. She was mine and would be mine, no matter what distance she decided to put between us. Her shaking fingers found my shirt as she worked to undo the buttons. Her eyes searched mine, unsure if I would allow her to continue, but I loved that she was willing to risk punishment to be with me. I knew I was forever hers as well. I’d never be able to escape Emma, no matter who I was with. She would always be the one that changed everything.

When I did not stop her, she focused on the task at hand, not daring to question my kindness. She pushed the shirt over my shoulders, and I let it fall to the ground as her gaze danced over my tribal tattoo and back to mine. I took in every inch of her toned, milky skin. She pulled her lower lip between her teeth as she waited for me to make my next move. I lifted her in my arms again, wrapping her body around mine as I carried her off to the bedroom.

I wanted to take her to the third floor and keep her there forever to be mine whenever I wanted to take her. But I didn’t want that to be the last memory she had of us together. I needed to give her some semblance of normalcy. I wanted her to look back on our time together and not be completely revolted by who I was.

I laid her softly on the bed as I hovered over her, kissing the sweet flesh on top of her breasts. She lifted into me, pressing my lips harder against her as her nails raked over my back. I moaned and quickly undid my belt thenflexed under her touch.

“I want you, Emma. I want to possess you.” I groaned, hurting as I said the words. She would never be mine. I was so close to having the only thing I wanted in the world, and I was letting it slip through my fingertips. I didn’t know if this was what love felt like, but I didn’t want to feel like this for anyone but her. I wanted to please her and keep her safe, and that, to me, could be nothing else. I slid my jeans over my hips, not wanting to waste time kicking them all the way off. “Tell me that you’re mine.”

“Ahhh…” was the only sound she made as my mouth was once again on her. I slid my hand over her throat and gripped her jaw, jerking her head up so her gaze would meet mine. “Tell me.” I could no longer hide the desperation in my voice as I pushed my body harder against hers.

“I’m yours, only yours.” Her words were desperate as well but for other reasons. I didn’t want it any other way. I slipped my hand between us and loped them around her cotton panties, tugging harshly and ripping them from her body. Her hips lifted, and she ground against me, flesh against flesh. My eyes fell closed for a second as I let the pleasure wash over me.

I gripped the base of my cock and rubbed the head of myself against her wetness. She moaned, squeezing her eyes closed.

“Look at me. I want to watch you come.”

She squirmed beneath me, and I tried to memorize every curve of her beautiful face. I slid inside of her tight pussy slowly, wanting to savor every second. She panted with parted lips. I reached between us and ran my fingers over her clit. I ran the wetness over her lower lip and her tongue darted out; I lost all control. I slammed deep inside of her, hard. She bit down on her lip as I continued my furious pace.

“I…love…you…” I groaned as she met my thrust. Her legs tightened around my hips, and I knew she was close to coming.

“I love you,” she cried out, gripping onto the blanket as she tightened around the length of me. I came hard, binding us as one for what I knew would probably be the last time.

I collapsed on top of her, emotionally and physically spent. Her delicate fingers laced behind my neck. “I love you,” she whispered into my ear—her words the only sound I ever wanted to hear. I kissed along her neck until my lips reached her ear.

“I love you so much, Emma.” I held her tightly against me, not wanting to ever let her go, until she drifted off into a peaceful sleep below me.

My mind raced with thoughts of an empty future of solitude. How would I continue to protect her and keep her safe when her aunt filled her in on what kind of man I really was? I knew I had already asked too much of her, and she gladly accepted my faults, but everyone has a limit. Then the truth crept into the back of my mind. Emma wouldn’t need protection once she was rid of me. I was the reason her world was crumbling. If not for me, she would be starting her life as an adult. She would be falling in love and beginning a career. It made me sick to my stomach to know that I was the worst thing for her.

I tossed and turned the entire night until I decided to leave the bedroom so I wouldn’t wake her.

Chapter Four

I was on my second pot of coffee when the bedroom door opened, and Emma stepped through, already dressed for the day. I couldn’t help but smile sadly at the sight of her. I never wanted to forget how absolutely stunning she was when she first woke in the morning.

“Sleep well?” I hoped she hadn’t noticed that I hadn’t slept at all. I couldn’t force myself to close my eyes and miss out on the last few hours we may have had together. She grinned widely as she made her way toward me. I opened my arms and hugged her tightly, lifting her feet from the ground. “Shame. I was going to say if you weren’t happy, we could try again.” I winked at her as I sat her back on the ground. I was good at hiding my emotions, as I rarely felt anything outside of anger, but this was a struggle. Stephen’s words replayed in my head. He was wrong. This was love. It had to be love, and it was the most intense pain I had ever felt.

She smacked my chest playfully. Without thinking, my hand shot up and grabbed her wrist tightly.

“Careful. You know I like to play rough.” A beautiful crimson crept over her cheeks, and I had to look away to keep myself from changing my mind about being the good guy. I turned around and grabbed her a mug of coffee, already made to her taste.

“Thanks,” she smiled as she closed her eyes and inhaled. “Just what I needed.”

“I thought I was what you needed?” I frowned, but I knew I wasn’t, even if she thought differently. She took a sip from her steaming cup.

“I need this to keep up with you.” She laughed. For a minute, we were just a normal couple standing in our kitchen and enjoying each other’s company. It was the perfect lie.

“I better put on another pot, then.” I looked her over, wishing I could get just one extra day with her, but I didn’t deserve it. Didn’t deserve her.

“We can’t. We have to go see my aunt today.” She took another long sip from her mug.

I sighed and drank down the rest of my drink. “I guess we’d better get it over with, then.” I couldn’t look her in the eye. I stared down at my empty mug, fighting the urge to throw it against the wall.

“It’s not life or death, William. Worst thing that is going to happen is she will call me a whore and things will be exactly the same as they have always been.” She rolled her eyes as she spoke of her aunt and took another drink.

I only wished that were the worst thing that would happen. Instead, she would learn about my frequent visits to the sex club her aunt worked at. She, no doubt, would learn of her aunt’s infatuation with me. And the cherry on the cake will be whatever my ex had confessed to her. I knew that my ex must have told J something to convince her that I was a danger to Emma. My eyes searched her beautiful face as I pictured tears streaming down her cheeks, and I wouldn’t be able to hold her and make it all better. “Fine.” I slammed my mug on the counter and made my way to my bedroom to get ready. I grabbed a dark-gray shirt from my dresser and pulled it over my head as I made my way back into the main living area. Emma’s eyes were on my stomach as I pulled the shirt down, covering myself.

“Are you sure you don’t want to have a little fun first?” It was a last ditch effort to delay the inevitable, to feel normal if only for a few more minutes.

“Come on. Let’s just get this over with.” She sat her cup down and grabbed her purse. She held her hand out to me to take, and I did, pulling her body against mine. My lips pressed against hers, needing to feel her love for me. Her body relaxed against mine, and her lips fell open, inviting me in. I ran my tongue along her upper lip before slipping it inside and pushing against hers. She moaned into my mouth, and I knew if I really wanted to, I could delay our demise just a little while longer. My cock grew painfully hard at the thought of taking her back to my bed. I was tired of manipulating her. I pulled back, hating how alone I felt just inches from her.

“I need you.” I meant it in every sense of the words. I needed her to breathe, to feel. Without her, I knew I would lose myself again in the sadness and anger. I wouldn’t be able to come back again from the darkness. There would be no other Emma for me.

“I promise, when we get back, you can take me anywhere and anyway you like.” She grinned wickedly as she pulled her lower lip between her teeth. I would miss this. I would miss her so much it would be unbearable.

I reached up, using my thumb to free her lip from her teeth. “Let’s go.” I took her hand and pulled her behind me as we left the apartment and made our way down the stairs. I was fighting against my natural instinct of self-preservation.

Chapter Five

As we pulled up outside of Judy’s house, Emma looked like she was on the verge of a panic attack. It killed me to know it was going to go much worse than she could ever imagine. It wasn’t as simple as her aunt disapproving of us, which was one thing I could not protect her against. She needed to know who the man she loved really was. I didn’t deserve her, and a small part of me had always known that. Still, I entertained the idea of running off with her and keeping her blissfully ignorant to the monster I was inside.

“Having second thoughts?” I asked, brushing a few strands of hair off her forehead. She shook her head as she opened her door. She paused looking back at me over her shoulder. “Just give me a minute, okay?” I nodded, and she leaned across the seat, giving me a chaste kiss on the lips before releasing my hand and leaving me to my own demons.

She walked toward the house, glancing back at me as she made her way across the street. It tore me up inside to sit back and let everything we had fall apart, but I wasn’t going to go against what Emma wanted. I watched her open the front door and step inside. My entire body was humming as I forced myself to sit in the car. My mind flashed with Judy telling Emma all the terrible things about me, and I wouldn’t be there to console her Not that she would want me to touch her after she finds out just how sick and twisted I really am. But Judy wouldn’t offer her that comfort, either. She would laugh in her face. I glanced over at the house and noticed that the driveway was empty. That was all the convincing I needed. I got out of the car and made my way across the street, slipping inside the front door of the small home.

Emma stepped out of the hallway, relief on her face, and I was finally able to breathe again.

“I was just going to call you. She’s not home.”

Her words took a second to sink in. Judy wasn’t home. I couldn’t help but smile. I had more time with Emma, if even just another day. I felt the weight of my guilt lift from my shoulders.

“Let’s go back to my place. A promise is a promise.” I smiled as I lowered my mouth to hers, needing to touch her. Before our mouths could meet, a faint melody interrupted us.

“What’s that?” She pulled back from me as her eyes searched mine. She made her way down the narrow hall, and I followed behind her, the sound growing louder as we approached. She stopped suddenly in my path, and her hand flew over her mouth.

“Oh, my god. That’s my aunt’s ringtone. She’s home.” She whispered, panic in her voice.

“But her car wasn’t in the driveway.” I said as Emma’s eyes searched mine. She hadn’t noticed, but that didn’t ease her worry. She reached out and gripped the doorknob to her aunt’s bedroom. It creaked loudly as she shoved it open. It took a moment for our eyes to adjust to the darkness.

I froze as I saw the lifeless, naked body of J strewn across her bed. Her legs were wide open, and she stared off into nothingness. This was what I wanted to avoid. I had done everything, even prepared to sacrifice my own love to make things right. Was this some sort of a cruel joke?

“Judy!” Emma’s painful scream broke me from my fog. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her back from the room, trying to block her aunt’s dead body from her view. She struggled against my grip, and I held her tighter, refusing to let go. I would never let her go again. She thrashed and struggled as she cried out in heartbreak. I stroked her hair as I clutched her to my chest, hating that this was the only way she could still be mine. Even though I had not perpetrated the crime, I knew without a doubt that she had died because of me. Stephen had stepped up when he knew I wouldn’t.

“Shhh…” I whispered into her hair as I tried to desperately to keep her from losing it completely.

“I need to call someone!” She was breaking down. I pulled her toward me and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“It’s going to be okay, Emma. I’m going to take care of you.” I had no other choice. Confessing all of my sins now would only leave her completely alone. Not even I was that cruel. I wiped the tears from her cheeks as she looked up at me through unsure eyes. “I’ll be here the whole time.”

I placed another kiss on her damp skin before taking her by the hand and guiding her down the hallway to the kitchen. I grabbed Emma’s cell phone and guided her out the front door into the blistering heat of the afternoon sun.

With shaky fingers, she unlocked it and dialed the police.

“My aunt…my aunt is…,” she sobbed. Her voice was so weak and fragile. I couldn’t imagine that this was less painful for her than finding out who I really was. I took the phone from her shaky hands and carefully explained to the operator what had happened as Emma sank to her knees and cried. I didn’t deserve to be Emma’s hero in this situation. I was anything but. I hung up the phone and grabbed Emma, helping her to her feet. I took her in my arms and held her as more sobs wracked her body.

“This can’t be happening.” Her fingers fisted into my T-shirt, and she clung to me. Sirens began to wail in the distance, and soon the driveway filled with police and emergency vehicles of every kind. They moved in and out of the house, talking to us in brief spurts as they assessed the situation. Finally, an officer stood in front of us with notebook in hand.

“I need to take your statements,” he said, his eyes dancing between us.

“I just came home. I didn’t think she was here. I found her.” Emma sounded like she was in a daze.

“Can you verify your whereabouts in the past twenty-four hours?” His gaze drifted between Emma and me.

“She was with me.” Admitting that Emma and I were together would finally do us some good. It was sickening that anything in this situation would bring me any kind of pleasure, especially if I was the indirect cause. I shook the thought from my head. This was Abby’s doing. If she had kept her distance and not been so goddamned greedy, Emma wouldn’t be hurting.

“Is there anyone else who can verify that?” he asked. His eyebrow rose as he looked at us. I glanced down at Emma, my lip curling into a slight smile.

“We were alone.” I saw it register in his eyes that Emma and I were alone together for good reason. He didn’t push it further.

He continued to question us, directing most to Emma, but when she was unable to find the words or contain her emotions, I did my best to fill in the blanks. No one knew that J and I had a past outside of the club. To the outside world, it would be a coincidence if it ever came to light. Even Emma would verify that we had never met while we’ve been a couple. I had dodged a bullet, while J lost her life.

They brought J’s body out on a stretcher covered by a thin white sheet, and Emma collapsed in my arms. I knew she had seen too many of her loved ones’ lives cut short. It killed me inside to know that if I hadn’t been in her life, she might still have her around. I was also well aware that Judy did not care for Emma, and who knew what state of mind she would be in without someone who loved her and protected her?

“Do you have somewhere you can go for a few days?” The officer directed the question to me. “This is a crime scene, and you won’t be allowed back inside until we’re done here.”

Emma nodded as she borrowed deeper into my side. I held her firmly against me. I wasn’t going to let her leave my sight. Not now or ever. The officer reached out, patting Emma on the shoulder to offer his condolences. I stiffened, hating another man touching her. It went unnoticed.

After hours in the sun, we were finally finished with the questioning. We needed to go down to the station and make our official statements. I knew Emma had been through enough, but it was important for her to give her side of the story while it was fresh in her mind and her emotions were still in overdrive. The police needed to see how affected she was by the loss, if only to keep their eyes from turning to me. After they were satisfied, we made our way back to Judy’s house.

I waited outside while an officer escorted Emma to her room to gather a few of her belongings. She stepped outside after a few minutes, with fresh tears in her eyes. I took her hand and pulled her away from the home. As we made our way toward the end of the driveway, the garage door rose behind us, and Emma gasped as she turned to see her aunt’s car inside. Whomever Stephen had hired to do this could have still been inside, and we would have never known. I could have sent Emma in to her death. It ripped me apart to hide the rage that boiled inside of me as I thought about how careless I had been.