Текст книги "Shaken, Not Stirred"
Автор книги: Sawyer Bennett
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Текущая страница: 17 (всего у книги 19 страниц)
“I love you, Tenn,” she says again with a clear voice, her eyes pinning me hard. “And if you love me, and you want me to, I’ll stay here with you if this is where you’re meant to be.”
I can’t explain the feeling that starts to overwhelm me because it’s something I’ve never experienced before, and I don’t know that mere words could ever do it justice. But in just the space of a sharp inhale of air into my lungs, my entire world becomes complete. In just that moment, I know, without a doubt, that my life will never be more perfect than it is in this moment.
For the first time ever, I have the love of a woman that is more precious to me than the oxygen that sustains me. More important than my dreams to open a custom motorcycle shop. More essential to my way of living than anything else.
At this moment, Casey takes up one half of my heart while Zoey takes up the other, and because it’s so fucking full, nothing else really matters.
And with such an epiphany glowing within me, I realize in this moment that I want Casey more than I have ever wanted anything in my life. I draw her into me, pressing my face forward to capture her lips. Our hats bump against each other and immediately fall backward off our heads, tumbling to the ground, but that only makes the sun feel that much better upon me.
Casey turns in the saddle slightly, causing the leather to creak. Whiskey, being the good gelding that he is, just stands placidly as Casey’s hands release the pommel completely and clutch at my shirt.
While my mouth claims hers, the arm around her waist loosens, and my hand drops automatically between her legs, the need to touch her as intimately as possibly completely overwhelming me. My fingers snake under the hem of her dress and pull it up high. I pull back from her lips briefly and angle my head down, looking at the tiny scrap of white lace between her legs with my fingers hovering just over it.
I glance back up at her briefly, rocked by the love and desire in her eyes, and my fingers dive under the elastic edge of her panties. Shifting my leg, which spreads her open a little further, I slide a finger deep inside her pussy. She groans and her head falls back against my shoulder.
So wet and warm.
My finger works her lazily, and her breath starts to hitch. Her hips gyrate, grinding against my cock, which is now painfully hard.
“Ever fucked on a horse?” I murmur just before I nip at her ear.
She shakes her head frantically, and then bucks against me when I start to circle her clit.
“Me either,” I tell her. “But I’m about to.”
“Tenn,” she says shakily as her hands grab onto my wrist, attempting to halt my ministrations. “I don’t want to fall off.”
“Shhh,” I gentle her. “Whiskey’s a good horse. And I’m not about to let you fall.”
“Okay,” she says with a moan as I continue to pluck at her with my fingers.
I’ve never done this before but in my mind, I know exactly how it needs to work. I’ve been riding horses since I was three years old and feel as comfortable in the saddle as I do lying on a mattress. After looping the reins around the pommel and scooting back to the edge of the saddle, I easily pick Casey up and turn her around to face me, and because she’s so lithe, she easily is able to make the adjustment by cocking her leg up high and squeezing it between us until we are adjusted face to face.
Whiskey takes a few slow, side steps as we adjust in the saddle, but that’s more about him accommodating the new change in weight distribution and I don’t give it another thought.
My only thought is my hands going under Casey’s ass and using the strength in my arms alone to lift her up several inches. “Open my jeans,” I tell her urgently.
Her hands drop quickly and with sure movements and some rocking of my own hips, she gets my belt and fly opened and the material pushed down enough to free my cock. And fuck… she looks down at it where I can feel it’s already leaking with need and actually licks her lips like she wants to swallow me whole.
Christ… I can’t wait. I haul her closer to me while she grips the base of my dick with one hand and the other slips into the crotch of her panties to jerk them to the side, baring her gorgeously slick pussy to me.
“Fuck,” I say as I lower her… my face slanted downward so I don’t miss a second of my cock as it slides up into her.
We both groan in ecstasy once I become fully lodged inside, her legs naturally wrapping around my waist with her boots resting on Whiskey’s backside.
“Hold on to my shoulders, baby,” I tell her as my hands go to the reins. “And hang on tight, okay?”
Her eyes are glazed but I know she understands me because she does exactly as I tell her to, and then goes one step further by wrapping her arms all the way around my neck and placing her cheek against mine.
With a soft cluck of my tongue and a tiny tap of my heels into Whiskey’s flanks, I urge him forward with only enough rein so that he maintains a slow walk. I use the opportunity to let Casey get the feel of the motion and within moments, she rocking counter to Whiskey’s gait. My cock isn’t getting much friction at this pace, other than a gentle massage of her walls against mine as she grinds against me. This is fine though, because this is so fucking hot right now, I’m afraid I might bust a quick nut if I don’t get some control first.
Casey’s little gasps and moans though turn me on like nothing I’ve ever experienced with her before and with sharper kick of my boots, I urge Whiskey into a soft canter, causing both of us to gasp and moan.
With the first loping stride, Casey slides up my cock and then back down in a fluid motion and my eyes practically roll into the back of my head because nothing should ever feel this good. Casey moans loudly as Whiskey provides us with all the motion we need by which we can fuck each other.
The sound of hooves punching into the ground and the slap of our flesh against each other rings hard in my ears and then starts to fade as I begin to get overwhelmed by Casey sliding up and down on me. Tiny whimpers fall from her lips but what I really need is to hear her scream out to the Wyoming skyline.
I tighten the lead on the reins just a fraction and Whiskey immediately responds, slowing into a trot that almost has me coming immediately as Casey’s body starts slamming hard on my dick. My balls ache because every crash down on me also crushes my poor nuts against the saddle, but the feeling of her bouncing up and down on my cock feels way better than the pain of it.
Casey and I have absolutely no control over our bodies. This is all Whiskey’s choppy pace that has Casey fucking me harder than I’ve ever been ridden before, and when she starts grunting with every downward thrust, I feel my bruised balls start to tighten.
Pressing her face into my neck, I feel wetness there as Casey mutters against me, “So good. So good,” and then her fingers grab my hair and she jerks my head hard as she screams my name while she starts coming all around me.
My own explosion bursts forth, and I pull hard on the reins so Whiskey comes to an immediate halt. Casey sags as I straighten my legs in the stirrups and thrust up into her one more time while I start to unload, grunting out my pleasure like a fucking caveman. My entire body shudders, and I look up to the sky to see it looks impossibly bluer. The clouds miraculously fluffier.
My heart definitely feels infinitely fuller.
I grasp onto the back of Casey’s neck and pull her away from me. She looks at me with muddled eyes and cheeks flushed a lovely pink.
“You okay?” I pant hard, stroking my thumb up the side of her throat.
Her lips curl and then part, rewarding me with a beautiful smile. She nods and murmurs in a shaky voice, “I insist we have sex like that more often. It’s a damn good reason for me to move here to be with you.”
I laugh, pull her into me, and squeeze her tight, then just as quickly tug on her so I can see her face again. My lips find hers and I take her mouth sweetly, pouring every bit of my heart into it. She sighs in contentment and murmurs my name against my tongue.
Casey pulls back marginally and smiles… as bright as the Wyoming sky. “I love you, Tenn.”
My heart squeezes in pleasure and equal parts sadness. It’s because I love her and know now that she loves me that I need to do something that she might not quite understand.
“Casey… baby,” I say quietly, holding her neck firmly so she looks at me. “I love you too. But you can’t stay here with me.”
Chapter 27
Casey
“Are you still pissed at Tenn?” Brody asks as he dries the pot I just washed. Alyssa is wiping down the dining room table while Mom and Dad sit out on the back deck and sip at their glasses of wine.
I’ve been back from Wyoming for almost two weeks now and things aren’t going well. And even though my preference in times such as these are to hide away with my thumb stuck firmly in my sucking mouth, I’ve decided to come out of hiding and join the real world again. My first order of business was accepting Mom’s dinner invitation tonight because honestly… there wasn’t anything that my mom’s cooking usually couldn’t cure, and my bad mood was in need of some fixing.
Shrugging my shoulders, I say, “I’m definitely fucking cranky with him.”
Brody laughs and nudges me with his shoulder. “Have you heard from him lately?”
“No,” I say sullenly and viciously scrub at the spatula. “It’s been three days.”
Three long miserable days without any word from Tenn. Three days that I have thought the worst… that he’s moved on with his new life in Wyoming and what I thought was true love was apparently nothing more than just some overworked hormones when we were together.
Now that we’re apart, he’s drifted away, and I’m so thoroughly confused and depressed, I’m doubting every single emotion the man had once made me feel.
Two weeks ago, he packed me onto a plane and told me that he needed time to figure out what to do with the mess that had been dealt to him. He told me that I couldn’t stay there with him because I would only be a distraction, but then he did say something unbearably sweet and which provided me with a small measure of hope.
“I need you back in North Carolina, Goldie, so I have something to work for. I need you there to make me bust my ass to get back to you.”
So, I accepted that and with my heart sad over leaving him but hopeful that we would be together again, I left.
And at first, it was fine. I missed him terribly both body and soul, but I was sustained with nightly phone calls. Random texts during the day fueled me on.
I love you.
I miss you.
Can’t wait to be balls deep inside of you again.
He was romantic and utterly filthy in turns, and that first week wasn’t so bad.
Tenn kept me updated as to what was going on. Both he and Woolf had meetings upon meetings with the estate attorneys, the corporate attorneys, financial advisors, the various ranch and oil well foremen, as well as some other family members that were involved in some of the ventures.
At first, I was buoyed by the fact that Woolf seemed to have finally stepped up to the plate. He assured Tenn that he was ready to take over the family businesses and give up his partying lifestyle. I remember Tenn had called me in the middle of the day, and he sounded so excited about it that I had the biggest smile on my face for hours afterward. I dreamed of the day he would come back and open up his custom bike shop and we would start our life together. Tenn assured me this was still his goal, and even told me that Nix was still on board and was content to wait until he got his shit sorted out.
But then the calls started slacking and logically, I knew this was because Tenn was extremely busy. He was putting in eighteen-hour days right alongside Woolf, and it worried me because I thought… if both of them were that busy with trying to keep things running, how could Woolf ever manage it on his own?
If Woolf couldn’t manage it on his own, then would Tenn ever be able to come back to me?
And then the thing that weighed heaviest upon me was the fact that if Tenn ended up being stuck in Wyoming, would he ever want me to come back? Would he want to continue to try to build something together, or would the Jennings dynasty suck every bit of him up and leave nothing behind for me?
Four days ago, he called me really late at night and told me that he and Woolf were flying to Chicago to meet with some investment bankers at the urging of the attorneys. It was felt that perhaps the easiest thing would be to take the company public, which would alleviate some of the management responsibilities on the two brothers. I took this to mean that perhaps the attorneys weren’t confident in either Woolf or Tenn’s abilities to step into their father’s shoes, and it felt like a backhanded slap to me.
But Tenn sounded so resigned when I talked to him, so eager for some type of game plan that could set his course in life whatever it may be, and he told me quietly, “It’s a good idea, I think. Hell, I don’t know. Maybe.”
He was suffering under the same confusion and muddled thinking that I was, and frankly… it just plain fucking sucked.
I got a text the following morning that he had landed in Chicago… and that was the last time I’d heard from him.
And because I’m not one to sit around and wonder what the hell was going on, I called Tenn twice for an update. I left him two voice mails and asked him to tell me what was going on.
I was met by utter silence and every day that has passed since, my anger started building until I reached the point that no matter what he said when he called, I knew he’d be on the receiving end of my ire first.
“He’s got a lot going on,” Brody says guardedly. “He’ll call when he gets a moment.”
I snort and level him with a sarcastic glare. “I’m sure he has time to take a piss… probably get a bite to eat. Even a few hours’ sleep. He sure as hell could spare a few of those minutes to give me a fucking call.”
“Ouch,” Alyssa quips as she walks back into the kitchen. “I’m thinking Tenn is going to get a major ass chewing when he finally calls.”
Almost as if on cue, my phone actually dings in my pocket and despite how mad I am at him and my bratty side demanding that I ignore him so he sees how it feels, I frantically reach into my pocket for my phone.
It’s indeed a text from Tenn, and my heart feels like it’s going to leap from my chest.
Back in WY. Have been slammed with meetings. Sorry haven’t called. Will call soon.
I stare at the text and my anger rages even hotter. I can’t believe he texts me a lame-ass apology with a vague promise to talk to me at some vague point in the future.
Don’t bother, I hastily text back as Brody stares at my phone over my shoulder.
Shaking his head, Brody gives me a reprimand. “Seriously, Casey? Kind of juvenile.”
“No more juvenile than when I tell you to ‘bite me’,” I sneer back at him, and my eyes stay glued to my screen.
The first contact in three days and it’s a brief text to me? I’m apparently not important enough to warrant a quick phone call?
Asshole.
Another ding has me tensed and prepared for battle as I read Tenn’s reply. You really don’t want me to call you?
Well, shit. Of course I want him to call me. I want him to grovel in apology for making me worry and hurting my feelings, but something that I call a little bit of the Markham stubborn pride rears its very ugly head.
While I’m not willing to cut off my nose to spite my face, I take a middle of the road approach when I write back. I haven’t heard from you in three days. It’s really kind of moot if I hear from you soon or not.
I study the message carefully. It’s cryptic enough he’ll scratch his head, but it’s by no means cutting ties with him. It’s merely my way of voicing my feminine displeasure.
I hit send.
“You are such a brat,” Brody mutters as he continues to read our interplay over my shoulder. I turn away from him to shield my phone and patiently wait for Tenn’s reply. I expect it will actually be a phone call so he can give me a piece of his mind, so it’s no surprise my stomach drops just a bit when a text comes back quickly.
It’s only one word.
Brat.
Same fucking word Brody just used.
“Aaaghhh,” I scream out and throw my phone across the kitchen, watching as it shatters against the wall.
Brody stares at me as if I’ve gone crazy, and Alyssa’s mouth drops open in astonishment. Both my parents come running inside, looking around with wild eyes over the disturbance.
I look around at each of them, their gazes all soaked with sympathy that Casey Markham is hurting and quite possibly going insane.
Brody is the one that acts though. He merely opens his arms up to me, and I burst into tears as I step into my brother’s embrace.
“Feeling better?” Gabby asks as she burrows under my covers beside me in bed. We’re watching our favorite movie, Talladega Nights, and although Gabby snorts and wheezes in laughter every ten minutes or so, I’m staring blankly at the screen.
I look down into my empty wine glass, the fourth of the evening since Brody and Alyssa brought me home. “I’m feeling drunk, not better,” I mutter.
After my meltdown at my parents’ house, Operation Casey went into full effect. Brody comforted me with his strong arms while my mom stroked my hair and cooed words of encouragement to me. My dad made a big production of cursing Tenn as a means of showing visible support of my position, even though I know he didn’t mean it. He really, really likes Tenn. Alyssa jumped on the hotline and called Gabby, who was waiting at my house with three bottles of wine.
I climbed out of Brody and Alyssa’s truck, feeling like a wet noodle after I cried for half an hour straight. I immediately felt terrible for being—well, a brat. Tenn didn’t deserve it, but I was operating on pure emotion and BHS… Battered Heart Syndrome.
My immediate regret turned into despair when I realized that my phone was broken beyond repair and I couldn’t amend my words to Tenn. I couldn’t do this even when Brody offered his phone to me, because I had no clue what Tenn’s number was. It was programmed into my phone so I never had the need to memorize it.
My immediate thought was to go home and hover over my landline phone, hoping and praying Tenn would call, but then I remembered I disconnected that line over two months prior in an effort to cut down on expenses.
Now all I could do was drink wine, get drunk, and let Gabby and Will Ferrell try to make me feel better.
So far, it wasn’t working.
Logically, I knew Tenn loved me and that he would not let our last interchange rule the future of our relationship. He’d find a way to get up with me despite my broken phone. However, as a panicked and irrational woman feeling like she had just lost the love of her life, I was convinced I’d never talk to Tenn again. Oh, he would assuredly text me back, and hell, he’d probably try to call. But the texts and voice mails would all go unanswered because I BROKE MY FUCKING PHONE.
Letting my head fall back, it thumps against the headboard and I give what may have been the longest, most pitiful sigh of the evening yet.
“I’m so undeserving of him,” I moan to Casey.
“Oh, shut the fuck up,” she growls at me, never taking her eyes off the television. “You’ll get a new phone, and you’ll call and apologize to him.”
“I can’t afford a new phone,” I whine.
“I’ll buy you one,” she says before finishing the dregs of wine in her glass.
“It won’t matter,” I say despondently. “By the time I get one, he’ll have already found someone else. He’s too good of a man, you know? He won’t stay single for long.”
Gabby gives me a tremendously vicious eye roll but when her eyes come to rest, they aren’t on the movie but rather on me. “Casey… baby… I love you like I love Will Ferrell. But you are really starting to irritate the crap out of me. Where in the hell is the self-assured, take-no-prisoners woman that I grew up with?”
“She got whipped by love,” I tell her with a drunken smile. “My poor heart has been battered by love and I’m not sure it will ever recover. In fact, I’m pretty sure even my ovaries shriveled up and died tonight. I’m a loser.”
She mutters something… I think confirming my loser status, but then reaches over to the nightstand to open up another bottle of wine. Silently, she unscrews the cap—because that’s the way Gabby rolls—and fills her glass up again. She then tops mine off and puts the bottle back.
Reaching out, she clinks the lip of her glass against mine and then takes a sip. I, in turn, take a huge gulp and after I swallow, I lay my head on Gabby’s shoulder.
I’m drunk, I’m sad, and that’s a recipe for tears. They pool in my eyes and with the first blink, start sliding down my face. “I just want the same chance,” I say quietly and maybe a bit slurred.
“Same chance at what?” Gabby asks as she grabs the remote control and pauses the movie. She can tell I’m in a mood for some serious talk.
“Love,” I tell her tremulously. “I want what you and Hunter have. I want what Brody and Alyssa have. Gavin and Savannah, Wyatt and Andrea. I want what you all have, and I want it now. I want it with Tenn and no one else, and Gabby… I swear to God… if I lose him, I’ll never smile again.”
She pats my hand briefly then wraps her fingers around mine, giving them a reassuring squeeze. “Casey… trust me on this, please. You are going to have what all of us have. And I’m just optimistic enough for the both of us to know you’re going to have it with Tenn. Right now… you both are going through some tough times, but I know one thing… that man is crazy about you. He is not going to give you up, no matter what the fuck is going on back in Wyoming. No matter how big of a brat you were to him. I guarantee you that he is doing everything humanly possible to make his way back to you, and you know what? If he isn’t able to get out from underneath those obligations, he’s going to bring you to Wyoming. I don’t want to lose you, but I’ll gladly pack you up and send you off to him, because I know that this is what you are destined for. You and Tenn are meant for each other. You’re going to get married, have the most beautiful babies in the world, and you are going to become a full-fledged member in our Club of Love.”
“Club of Love?” I ask with a true smile on my face for the first time since I broke my phone. “Is that what it’s called?”
“Well, we haven’t officially voted on the charter name yet, but I think it sounds great,” she says with another squeeze to my hand. And then in a voice that sounds so confident, I actually feel a tiny kernel of hope start to take root, she says, “I swear to you Casey. You are going to get your happily ever after with Tenn. You deserve it more than anyone else I know.”
I push up off her shoulder and turn my despairing eyes her way. “You really believe that? That I deserve something that good?”
“You more than deserve it,” she says confidently and then levels a stern gaze my way. “Now drink your wine, get a bit more hammered, and start watching this movie with me. It’s our favorite.”
I grin at her as I swipe the back of my hand across my cheeks to dry them. “You’re my favorite, Gabby.”
“Aww,” she says with her eyes going soft and round. “You’re my favorite too.”
