Текст книги "The Scheme"
Автор книги: Mia Kayla
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Текущая страница: 16 (всего у книги 18 страниц)
NINETEEN
BRIAN
I stepped into the condo and dropped my laptop bag to the floor. I was functioning like a walking zombie lately, not speaking, not socializing, just going through the motions, typing at my computer, and answering only when spoken to at work.
In the end, Tiggins Corporation had decided to drop their current bank and move over to Financial State. My manager was ecstatic. When he’d heard of the news, he’d slapped me on the back and sang my praises. I was now a shoo-in for that promotion, and everyone was raving about this great win for the bank. Funny how that worked. Weeks ago, this had been all I’d wanted, to land the account and be the big shot. Now there was not an ounce of me that was excited because work wasn’t as important to me anymore.
I’d fallen in love, but the girl didn’t want me. Instead, she wanted a boring, emotionless prick, who happened to be a rich doctor and the predicted love of her fucking life. Anger choked me, and the more I thought of it, the more I wanted to put my fist through the damn wall.
Whatever.
I did wish her happiness, even if I hated the asshole. Part of me felt guilty for hating him, since I didn’t technically know him, but just the fact that he thought he could have a great girl like Kendy made my face go all red-hot with fury as a seething type of resentment kept eating me up.
I rubbed my brow, feeling a massive headache coming on. Fuck my fucking life. I stalked toward the fridge and reached for my cold beverage of choice then staggered to the couch and turned on the television.
My hands wrapped around the cold beer bottle as I stared at the TV screen, seeing nothing. Good. That’s how I wanted to feel. Maybe mindless TV would help. At least until I was butt ass drunk and passed the hell out.
***
My ass hurt, and I shifted on the couch. Shit. I tipped my head back and drank my fourth beer. My stomach growled for the tenth time, but I’d decided an hour ago I’d get drunk faster if I didn’t eat. The last time I’d eaten was lunch. Still, I needed to numb this dull pang in the center of my chest. It’d only been a few days, and I was sick and tired of being in pain. Being in love fucking hurt. Someone should put that on a billboard, instead of the cheesy shit they always advertised.
I turned up the volume of the TV, raising it to full blast. The bass echoed what the announcer was saying, shaking the coffee table in front of me.
When the door opened, Trey walked through with his work out bag slung over his shoulder. One look at my sorry ass and he dropped the grey backpack on the floor, strolled to the fridge, and grabbed a beer.
I didn’t even offer a hello as my gaze flipped back to the TV. If he even said her name, I’d mention Katelynn to shut him up. I couldn’t talk about her. Not now. It was too fresh.
The couch cushion indented beside me, and he rested his beer on the coffee table. “Wanna talk about it?”
“Nope.” I reached for my fifth beer and pounded it back. The alcohol should’ve warmed me up, but the cold, dull pain was still very present in the center of my chest.
When I thought of Stiff and Kendy on their date, I couldn’t deal. Picturing his hands on her had my arms tensing and the veins in my forearms bulging. I gripped the beer bottle in a tight vise, having a sudden urge to break the glass just to feel physical pain. That would be less excruciating than this unbearable ache. But then I pictured cleaning it up and thought better of it.
Always the responsible one. Yep, that was me. Maybe that was why Kendy didn’t want me. Nice guys finished last, after all.
Trey snatched the remote beside me and lowered the volume. From my periphery, I could feel him burning a hole in the side of my face. When I paid him no attention, he reclined against the cushions as we both pretended to watch TV.
“I don’t know if I can handle seeing your sister.”
I closed my eyes and let out a jagged sigh. He never mentioned my sister. This was his way of forcing me to open up.
“I made her hot cocoa,” I muttered, trying to change the subject, or maybe I was just rambling now, “ . . . left my stupid mug there.”
He frowned, probably wondering where this was headed and what a damn drink had to do with anything.
I sighed again, not wanting to explain, and then I found the words spewing out anyway. “Hot cocoa reminds her of home, and I thought maybe . . . I could be her home in New York.”
I shook my head and felt the anger rising again, my face getting hot. “I’m so fucking stupid. I was going to win over a girl with hot chocolate.” I kicked the coffee table in front of me, causing the empty beer bottles to tip over. “Why couldn’t I just fucking follow the rules? I had it good. What guy falls for the ‘no strings’ girl?” Unable to keep my OCD in check, even drunk, I reached for the empty bottles and set them upright. “I fucked everything up.”
I let my head fall as I rubbed one hand from the base of my neck to the top of my head. “I fell hard for this one, Trey. Harder than I’ve ever fallen for anyone.”
He placed one hand on my shoulder, but didn’t say anything. He was just being a good friend.
I glanced up at him, my shoulders slumping. “Get me fucked up. I want to get so messed up that I forget her, everything about her.”
I wondered where she was now. With Stiff. I pictured his hands on her, on the base of her neck, kissing the birthmark on her inner thigh.
Fuck!
I hopped up from the couch and started to pace. “I can’t deal, man. Every time I picture him touching her, I go ballistic. I want to barge in on their date and stake my claim. She should be mine right now.” My voice trailed off as I gripped the ends of my hair. “Dude, let’s get wasted. Beer is not going to do it for me.”
Trey didn’t need to hear any more. He stood and clasped my shoulder with one hand, nodding with understanding. “I’m your man. Let’s go forget.”
***
KENDY
The scent of spices filtered through the room as I sat at the table for two at one of the most upscale restaurants in all of Manhattan. When we’d walked into the fancy Italian restaurant, there had been a line outside the door. Sarah had told me it took months to get a reservation at Italia Restaurant. Normally, I’d be ecstatic to dine at such an upscale restaurant. This place was frequented by the A-listers, for heaven’s sake! But not tonight.
James was sitting across from me in black pants and a navy blue button down. His pants were too tight for his ass, but it was like he’d worn them on purpose to showcase his assets. In all the fantasies I’d had about us, I imagined that would’ve had some sort of effect on me, but I felt nothing.
James continued to talk, but I didn’t hear a word he was saying.
The only thing that echoed in my mind was Brian’s disappointed face and his harsh words before he’d left. My stomach churned and my heart ached with the same pang that surfaced every time I thought about him.
My hair was done up in a half ponytail. I’d spent an hour making each individual curl stand out. I couldn’t believe I’d spent all that time on my hair for this date, for a guy I felt absolutely nothing for.
James laughed, breaking me from my thoughts, and I fake giggled along with him. He could’ve said he’d pooped in his pants. I had no idea, and honestly, I didn’t care, which wasn’t fair to him, yet I couldn’t break my mood.
The waiter, a taller guy about my age, showed up to take our order. He was looking dapper in his black and white waiter tux, matching all other servers in this fine establishment. “Ma’am, would you like to look over the wine list?”
As I opened the menu, I scanned the posh list written in curlicue. I was startled when James began to order for us. “We would like to order a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon.” He regarded me as though he knew what I wanted then winked.
I smiled, thinking I wanted white wine instead of red tonight, but hey, he asked me on this date, so I was going to go with this.
Still, Brian would’ve known my wine of choice. Plus, he wouldn’t have assumed I wanted red.
Shoving that thought away, I sat straighter. I didn’t need to be depressed tonight. I was beginning my life, starting something new. At least, that’s what I kept telling myself to justify this date.
The waiter recited the specials of the day and placed the menu down in front of us before leaving us to look over our options. I knew when James had decided on his meal because he closed his menu then started rambling again about work and how much they loved him there. I glanced at his untouched water as he prattled on about other hospitals vying for his attention and wanting him to make a switch.
James was a hand talker. He was giving me whiplash with all the gestures. I had noticed this mannerism in him, but I hadn’t realized how over the top it was until tonight.
“I love Manhattan, don’t you?” he asked, like he had finally realized he was on a date and should include me in the conversation.
“Yeah,” I said, no enthusiasm in my voice. I’d never felt more out of place since I’d moved to New York.
Unfazed by my lack of interest, he just continued on, prattling about his undergrad at Purdue and his residency at UCLA. All I did was smile and nod, sensing a headache coming on. All this crap he was talking about, I already knew, since I’d stalked him at the hospital.
Funny enough, I was glad he didn’t engage me in the conversation. It would’ve taken too much energy on my part.
When the waiter returned, he uncorked the bottle, poured our glasses of wine and set the bottle inside the ice filled bucket. As soon as the deep-colored liquid hit my glass, I grabbed it, almost splashing it on my little black dress. I tipped the glass back and stared at my menu, deciding the salmon special sounded divine. What never failed me was my love for food. My stomach was ready to get my eat on. Although the pastas looked delicious, my heart was set on fish.
“Are you guys ready to order?” The waiter angled in my direction. “Ladies first.”
I smiled at him and placed my menu on the table, my stomach already grumbling for the salmon with capers over a bed of vegetables. “I’ll take the fish.”
After James placed his order for a medium steak, he turned my way.
I forced a smile for both of our benefits. “It’s good I’m not on a diet because I’m planning to have dessert after this,” I said lightly. I had to get some pleasure from tonight especially since I wasn’t going to get any pleasure from him. I knew he wouldn’t be going home with me.
“A woman with an appetite. I like it.” He offered an easy smile, though it did nothing to my pulse.
“Thanks,” I said, my usual sassy comeback not there.
This date had turned from awkward to plain old weird. Our conversation was stilted, and if I had to rate this date compared to the history of all my dates, I’d rate this top of the list of dry-as-dust boring.
“So, you meeting a ton of people here?” he asked.
“Yeah. I mean, a fair amount. Work keeps me busy, and I’ve met a couple friends who I hang out with outside of work.” Too bad I could count the people I’d really grown attached to on one hand. And now that Brian had left, those friends could now be counted on one finger. Sighing, I looked toward the couple next to us, tired of small talk and feeling sorry for myself.
I was grateful when the waiter interrupted our awkward moment, setting a loaf of bread, parmesan cheese, and olive oil in front of us.
“Enjoy,” he said, leaving us alone to our world of weirdness.
I forced my sullen mood to the side, telling myself again that I had decided to go on this date. I’d agreed to have dinner with him. Why couldn’t I give him a fair chance?
The psychic had predicted it was him. She said I’d meet him at work, and he’d give me the moon. We’d complete each other, just like in fairy tales.
She’d predicted my life’s timeline, spitting it out as the cards laid in front of me. So far, everything had gone as planned. This was the missing piece. He was my missing piece.
He continued to talk about the charitable associations he was affiliated with, which piqued my interest. It seemed as though he devoted a lot of his time at St. Jude’s Hospital, which was very admirable. But after the waiter dropped our dinner off, James started blabbering about how he was such an asset to the hospital, and I started to lose interest. Bored again, I poked my fork through my salmon. His voice was beginning to grate on me.
Looking at his brown eyes, which matched his dark hair, I wondered what our future would hold. Would it always be like this? Him talking about himself and me biting my tongue, which was so unlike me?
“So tell me about your parents,” I said, interrupting him mid-sentence.
His eyebrows pulled together, like he was confused. My question was simple enough. At least, I thought so.
“We’re estranged,” he replied.
A soft gasp escaped me as my eyes widened. Estranged? Why?
Great. Now my babies would only have my mom as grandma.
“Both parents?” I asked, hoping maybe it was just one.
“Yeah.” He looked uncomfortable, but I needed to know his background, so I pressed on.
“What happened?”
He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I’d rather not talk about it. They’ve been trying to reach out, but I’ve been way too busy. Plus, we were never that close.”
I lifted an eyebrow, trying to read any sadness in his eyes. I saw none. Suddenly, any hope of this date panning out crashed, burned, and died. It was over. A man who didn’t appreciate his own parents was a deal breaker. Done.
He continued to talk about himself again, but I tuned him out, not breaking my sullen daze until he asked about Brian.
“Was that guy I saw you with the other night your boyfriend?” His tone turned lightly suspicious.
I flinched, not sure how to answer. No one had ever asked me to explain my relationship with Brian, even though it had been brief.
“No,” I answered and, when that one word left my mouth, the pang in the center of my chest resurfaced.
I wasn’t about to divulge how we had been doing the friends with benefits thing, but it had become so much more toward the end. More than I ever imagined it could be.
Well, whatever it had been when we’d started, it was nothing now. We weren’t even on talking terms.
“That’s good.” He looked relieved as he grabbed my hand. “I’ve had my eye on you for a while.”
Oh really? I wanted to ask, but I bit down on my tongue before my smartass mouth started flying off. I wondered if he’d noticed me before he’d left with the girl at the bar. I wondered if he’d noticed me the first time or second time when he’d left with someone else.
“Have you ever had a long term relationship before?” I sassed. “It doesn’t seem like you’re ready for anything serious.”
I hadn’t even fazed him. “I’m looking for something serious, but haven’t found the right woman yet.” His words sounded memorized, and I wondered how many women he’d used this one-liner on. More importantly, how many women had fallen for it?
“But you know, maybe I’m looking at her,” he said with a cheesy wink.
I blinked, unable to form words or even give him a reaction. As I stared at him, it hit me, the reality of my life. How strong I’d thought I was, yet so very afraid. How I had been living according to what had not even happened yet. And staring into James eyes, I knew we could never be. Ever. Not in a million years. Not even when the stars aligned.
If we ended up together, I’d still see Brian as the man, the one who got away. Because Brian owned my heart. There was no way anyone else could have me, because he owned me, had captured my heart in a matter of weeks.
I came to the realization there was reality and there was fantasy. And wanting a life with Dr. Hot Pants—though I didn’t think he was so hot, now that I was getting to know him—had been a total fantasy. I’d become so obsessed with the psychic’s predictions that I’d been blind to the truth.
And the truth was that I was madly and undeniably in love with someone else—Brian.
I scrunched my eyebrows together and tilted my head, wondering why on earth I’d ever thought I could feel anything for James. I needed to learn from my past, know that I would never let someone else control my life. I needed to live in the present and face my feelings.
As a plan formulated in my mind, a foreign sensation surfaced—hope. I found I suddenly had hope for the future, real promise for the first time in a very long time.
I only hoped that future included Brian.
***
At the end of dinner, we stepped outside into the humid night. A smile ruffled my mouth as I finally realized what I needed to do.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stop by my place for late-night drinks?” His face turned hopeful as he displayed a cheesy grin.
“Yeah, I’m sorry. It’s been a long day,” I replied politely, though inside I was screaming for freedom from this date so I could forge ahead with my plan.
His face turned sour, but he nodded.
I told him I would take a cab home, making an excuse about being really tired, though I was anything but. My insides were itching to get to the man I was in love with.
James reached for a hug, and I complied. I was glad he didn’t try for a goodnight kiss because I would’ve turned around, and the rejection wouldn’t have been cute.
“I had a great night, Kendall.”
“Me too.” Though James wasn’t the guy for me, I wished him the best.
After our weak embrace, we parted ways, and then I glanced at my watch, the dial almost as large as my fist.
Shit. It was ten-thirty. Was it too late to stop by?
Who cares?
The adrenaline spike had me hopping on my toes.
I knew where I needed to be, so I didn’t hesitate. I lifted my hand as I waited for a cab, restless and eager. In the back of my mind, fear tried to grab me again, but I shoved it away. I couldn’t let fear control me any longer. I’d made the biggest mistake by letting Brian walk away, and I prayed it was not too late to fix it.
***
The cab stopped in front of his condo, and my insides surged with energy. An insane grin was fixated on my face as my heart raced in my chest, knowing he was so close and within my reach.
I repeated what I was going to say in my head. I intended to apologize, tell him I had made a mistake, the biggest mistake of my life. I would tell him I regretted everything I had said a couple days ago, and then confess I loved him over and over.
I pictured the scene unfolding like in the movies—me crying, him holding me, us kissing, and then us finally together as a couple, proclaiming our love for each other.
I pressed the up button on the elevator, and I wrung my hands, my heart pitter-pattering so hard in my chest I was worried it would explode. An urge to flee washed over me. It was the same fear I was so familiar with, trying to terrorize me and alter my decision, but I closed my eyes and inhaled a long, calming breath to push all negative thoughts out of my head as the door pinged open.
When I stepped onto his floor, I heard boisterous laughter coming from down the hall. When I turned the corner, I staggered to a halt. Peeking over, I saw Brian and Trey, his roommate, as well as two strange girls congregated in front of the boys’ door. There was a blonde hanging all over Brian, and I bit back the bile that crept up my throat. I didn’t understand why she was literally hanging on him, when he already looked unsteady. Trey was equally preoccupied with the model-looking brunette blatantly making out with him.
Brian struggled to keep upright, using the frame of the door to keep himself from toppling over.
Was he drunk?
Yes. After a few seconds of watching him, I could clearly see he and Trey were both very much intoxicated, as were their female companions. Where had these girls come from? And how much had Brian had to drink? He couldn’t even keep his head up.
The long-legged woman with the shortest skirt pressed herself against Brian’s body and kissed his neck. I flinched, as though I’d been hit, a heavy nausea hitting my stomach.
Brian laughed at something she said, and I straightened, ready to stake my claim on him because he belonged to me.
I stepped out from my hiding spot, but they didn’t see me as I approached. I narrowed my eyes at the witch as her hands moved up and down the front of Brian’s shirt. He was so wasted he probably wouldn’t remember her name in the morning. When she went up on tiptoes to kiss him, I’d had enough.
“Brian,” I said, stalking toward them.
The expression on his face flipped like a deck of cards—surprise, adoration, and then he hardened and went back to ignoring me.
My stomach dropped to the floor, disappointment flooding my insides. Had I expected anything less? I’d been a total bitch and broken his heart, chewed it up, and spit it out. I didn’t deserve to be in his presence, yet here I was.
The blonde eyed me, but she looked away when Brian gave his attention back to her.
Trey immediately disentangled himself from his girl and advanced toward me. “Get out,” he commanded.
I clenched my teeth, ignored Trey, and focused on Brian. “We need to talk.” I gave the girl a back away look, but she rolled her eyes and just inched closer to Brian’s side, running her hands along his arms.
I gave her a onceover. She looked weak, too thin, but flaunting it with her little-to-nothing clothing as though thin was in. I could totally take her and her skinny stick figure out.
I came closer, now only a few feet between us. I needed to work for this, and begging was not out of the question. I would fight for him because I was the reason we weren’t together. It was my fault. “Please,” I said, begging him with my eyes.
His jaw tightened. His eyes were dilated, which told me he’d had too much to drink, but he didn’t look away, which gave me a tiny tinge of hope.
My voice quivered as I spoke. “I’m sorry,” I said, laying a hand on my racing heart. I didn’t care I was allowing them all to see my vulnerability. I didn’t care that I looked like a total dumbass. I focused all my attention on him.
“I’m so, so sorry. I just want to talk.” I was on the verge of tears. I knew I’d hurt him, and I’d do anything to make it right, to make us right again.
I took a deep breath and just said the words, the ones I should’ve said the other day, but was too chickenshit and stuck on that last damn prediction to do it. “I love . . . I love you.” It wasn’t the ideal place to tell him, but he needed to know. And I wasn’t ashamed to say it because it was the absolute truth.
For a brief moment, he saw me, and I soaked it in, giving myself hope. But then Trey stepped between us.
He glared at me with burning eyes as his temper flared. “What is your fucking problem? He’s had a taste of you; now he’s ready to move the fuck on to Brandy over here.” He nodded to the blonde still pawing my man.
“Brenda,” the blonde corrected him.
“Yeah, whatever,” Trey muttered with a wave of his hand. “How was your date with the doctor dude? He didn’t fulfill your dreams, so you’re back here for a real man?”
“That’s not it,” I insisted, peering over Trey’s shoulder to get a glimpse of Brian, but Trey moved to block my view. “Have you ever wished something to be true so badly that you couldn’t see anything else? I made a mistake,” I confessed, my insides breaking. I needed him to believe me and realize how much I regretted ever turning him away.
“Get out of here,” Trey seethed. “He’s done with you. You had your chance, and you fucking blew it. Leave.”
I tried to move around Trey, but he blocked my view of Brian. I decided to say it anyway. “I’m sorry. For ever hurting you. For ever thinking that anyone could be better for me than you. For thinking that someone else was it . . . when you were standing right in front of me the whole time.” I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt my cheeks wet from my tears.
When Trey finally moved a little, Brian was looking at me, but his eyes were unreadable. He turned away, as though he couldn’t bear to see me cry, and then he uttered the words that shattered me and crushed the hope I had felt just moments ago. “Just go, Kendy.” Then he stepped inside his apartment, not bothering to look back as Brenda followed after him.
The color drained from my face as my lungs constricted, making it difficult to breathe, difficult to stand. I fell back against the wall, my legs turning to jelly.
There was no sympathy in Trey’s eyes as he followed Brian inside, followed by his girl. When the door shut behind him, both hands flew to my chest as more hot tears coursed down my face. An ache so painful jabbed at my heart.
How could I have been so stupid to let my fears consume me to the point of pushing Brian away? Now my worst fear had come true. It was too late. I was too late.
***
I lay in bed for hours, a crying, slobbering mess. I’d ruined things, and there was no one to blame but myself. As the light of dawn began to shine over my purple comforter, I pulled the covers closer to my chin, wiping my tears onto the blanket.
I couldn’t stop picturing Brian with that girl. It hurt so badly to think of him being with anyone else but me, even though I’d basically thrown him away.
Now I was alone with my pain.
An unbearable ache in the center of my chest spread throughout my limbs. This ache maintained through the evening, only intensifying with every memory of our time spent together. I shut my eyes tightly, but the images of both of them together became more vivid. Bile rose from my stomach to the top of my throat. I felt like hurling last night’s dinner all over my bed, but I chewed on my bottom lip and prayed for sleep to come. Maybe sleep would help.
Everything the psychic had said was playing in my head—from my father to my career to moving to New York. From my mother’s engagement, and finally to her prediction of my dream guy, the guy who was supposed to mend my broken heart, give me hope about love, life, and my future.
I shook my head, knowing full well that James wasn’t it. I should’ve known all along. I don’t know why I hadn’t seen it. Maybe before Brian it would’ve worked out, but now nothing would ever compare to him. No one else could ever come close.
I didn’t get it. Maybe Beth was right. Maybe my future had changed.
My mind was a jumbled mess. It was like trying to decipher computer code. All I knew was that I loved Brian. I knew it in my core, the type of love that left you breathless and you wanted it to last forever. The type of love that made my heart race and my palms sweat like I was a teenaged girl. The type of love where he was all that occupied my mind, when I was at work, when I was at home, or wherever I was, and all I craved was his company.
After the sun rose, I gave up on sleep and shifted off the bed. One thing Kendy didn’t do was fall down and quit.
I needed to see him, fight for him, fight for our forever. I needed to try again, but not in front of people I didn’t know, and not when Brian was half-ass wasted.
But I was going to fight for him, just like he’d fought for me.
***
BRIAN
Four Tylenols later, I still had a major headache. It pounded painfully as I tied up the garbage bag and carried it down the stairs and out into the fresh outdoors. After seeing Kendy last night, I couldn’t stomach sleeping with Brenda, even though Kendy had most likely been with Stiff.
Still, I knew having sex with her wouldn’t cure the ache, so what was the point? Brenda ended up knocked out on my bed, and I slept on the couch. This morning, I had to wake her up and usher her out so I could really sleep soundly. But sleep never came.
The warm air outside hit my bare chest, and I squinted at the sun above me. The light was intensifying my headache, making my hangover even worse. I trudged over to the dumpster as the stench filtered through my nose, already making my stomach churn. Lifting the lid, I tossed the black garbage bag inside. When I turned around, I had to do a double take.
Kendy?
I was imagining things, probably still half asleep. There was no way she was standing right in front of me, looking like an angel who had fallen from Heaven.
The sunlight shone directly on her, mimicking a halo, but when she spoke and her angelic voice washed over me, I knew I was not dreaming.
***
KENDY
“Hi,” I said, twisting my hands anxiously in front of me. When I saw his lickable, chiseled abs, my mind flickered to Brenda and him together, and the unbearable pain that he’d been with her resurfaced.
“What’re you doing here?” There was bite behind his voice, more now than last night.
“I wanted to talk. Without the audience,” I said softly, but loud enough for him to hear.
Every ounce of me wanted to rush toward him, wrap my arms around his middle, and kiss him, start anew today. I’d never wanted anything as badly as I did in that moment.
“Kendy, there’s nothing to talk about.” His tone was hard, the tightness in his cold stare evident. “You’ve said all you needed to say.” He moved past me, and I took a deep breath, gathering all the courage within me because if he walked away, this would be it for us. The end.
My heart stammered in my chest at an uncontrollably quick pace. “I love you. I love you. I’m so, so, so sorry.” My voice leaked such emotion that he stopped mid-step. But he didn’t turn around. I wrung my hands together, trying to keep my fingers from trembling further.
Warmth spread behind my eyes, an indication that I’d cry at any moment as the magnitude of how much I needed him hit me. “I didn’t sleep with James. Throughout the whole date, I only thought of you.” I threw everything out there, all at once, hoping it would make a difference and praying he’d forgive me. Anything to win him back, to make him love me again.
Please say you still love me . . .
Because I’m utterly and irrevocably in love with you.
***
BRIAN
I tried not to let what she was saying affect me, but it did. I released a sigh of relief. I didn’t know if I could’ve handled it if she’d slept with him. I couldn’t even think about another man touching her without my muscles tensing and imagining beating the douche to a bloody pulp.
I needed to see her face, just so I could drink her in, but I hesitated. I wasn’t sure what this meant, but I was tired of putting everything out there for her and getting shut down.
