Текст книги "After Forever Ends "

Автор книги: Melodie Ramone

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Текущая страница: 23 (всего у книги 39 страниц)

Eddie met me at the road. “Thank God! Silvia! “

He swept the key from my hand and raced into the building. I took Caro, who was sleeping again by then, out of the car and bolted up the stairs to the flat. Eddie was struggling with the key in the lock.

“Jiggle it!” I told him. “Here, like this!” I stepped in front of him and gave the door a shake. It swung open.

Nigel was standing in the centre of the room holding a cup in his little hands. He grinned, a huge smile that revealed all five or so little teeth he had, and he said, “Paaaaaaa!” to Eddie, holding his arms out wide.

Eddie scooped him up and held him close, “Oh, Sonny,” He mumbled, “You’re safe now, you are…you’re safe…” Ana came beside them and put her hands on the baby’s head. She stroked him desperately with her palms as if to make sure he was still solid. Eddie stooped so she could kiss Nigel and there they stood, the two of them with their arms wrapped around him. Ana sobbed, Eddie held his breath.

I stayed in the doorway with Caro in a state of stunned disbelief.

Melissa had left him. Her own son. Not even two years old. She had left him alone in that ravaged flat with no one to look after him. Who knew how long he’d been there. Who knew what had gone on or what might have happened if Eddie and Ana had not seen her by chance strolling through town. What was she doing? What was she thinking? What in the bloody hell was wrong with that woman?

I suddenly hated her like I had never hated anyone in my life. I wanted to leave my daughter with her grandparents and go and find her. I wanted to shatter every bone in her body with my bare hands. More than that I wanted to take Nigel away and never let her see him again. She didn't deserve to.

“Let’s get him out of here!” Ana spat. She looked around the place and curled her nose, “Let’s get him out of here before that bitch comes back!” I had never heard her refer to a person badly before. Not once in all the years I’d know her. She said every word in Welsh, then switched to English, “Let’s get him home! I’m going to call Alexander myself this time!”

“Take him,” I told them, “And Carolena, too. I’ll get his things. If Melissa comes home, I’ll deal with her then, won’t I?”

After they left I was suddenly very calm. I walked to the baby’s room, which was the only room in the house that was tidy, and put enough for a week in a bag. I had no idea why I was packing like that, but it felt right, so I did it. I took everything. Clothing, toys, blankets, nappies, wipes, his shampoo and baby wash. I moved slowly, methodically, hoping Melissa would walk through that door so I could crush her skull, but she never came home, At least not until after I’d gone.

I phoned Oliver at the office from the car and told the nurse that it was an emergency. I told him he needed to get to his mother’s as soon as possible. He was a bit confused at first, but I filled him in with what I knew. He was furious, but he said very little, being as he was surrounded by people. “Bring Nigel to the office,” He said quietly, but his voice was low and serious, a tone he rarely used, “Straight away. It’s most likely he’s just fine, but…”

“He seems fine.”

“Thank God,” He replied quickly “But, mind, I’ll have a look at him all the same. I have to go. I’m phoning my shit brain of a brother.”

A different sort of panic swept me, “Oliver,” I knew how angry he was by the tone of his voice. Ollie didn't get angry often or easily, but when he did it often had a disastrous outcome for the object of his aggression, “Think before you speak. I don’t know if your mum’s rang him or not, but you know she’ll give him a proper scolding…”

“Not like I’m going to,” He was speaking through his teeth. I could tell. I could almost hear them gnashing, “I'm going to beat his arse.”

“Oliver, don’t! Alex didn't do this! She did this!” The thought of the twins fighting, the thought of that horrible wench finally setting a firm distance between them, was more than I could stand. “Alex needs you! He trusts you better than anybody! Please! Please don’t attack him! He’s going to be just as upset as we all are, but if you put him on the defensive…”

“He’ll take Nigel away from all of us.” He finished for me.

“It’s what I’m afraid of. And I'm afraid we'll lose him. Oliver, what will we do without Alexander? He's our brother!”

There was a pause. When he spoke again his voice had softened. “I won’t hit him. I won't even ring him. I’ll wait for him at mum’s. I'll talk to him.”

“Thank you, Sweetie.”

Oliver did speak with him that afternoon. The two of them went off into the yard and sat beside the birdbath. I caught a glimpse of them for a moment. It looked tense at first, but it wasn't long before Oliver's arm was around Alexander and he was squeezing him in a supportive gesture. Alex's head was hung, cradled in his hands.

They talked for hours while Ana and I sat with Nigel and Caro in the sitting room. The house was eerily quiet.

I would have thought that experience might have been enough for Alexander to take a stronger hand with his wife, but it seemed that he didn’t. I don't even know what was said to her or if anything was at all. He went home and everything went back to how it had been. I couldn’t believe it. I wanted to bash his head as much as I did hers and I was sorry that I'd told Oliver not to hit him. She could have killed their son with her neglect, but Alexander didn’t seem to want to do a thing about it.

It was putting a strain on Oliver and me as well. We never discussed it, really. I just got the feeling that he wouldn't have told me about it. It was another one of those things that he kept inside of him for his brother, some unspoken, private matter that only the two of them understood and neither of them felt any reason to let anybody else in on.

“Why?” I finally demanded Oliver explain. I couldn't take the stress, “Why doesn’t he do something about her? Why doesn't he take that boy away from her?”

Oliver looked surprised. It struck me that he had had no idea that I hadn't understood the situation from Alex's perspective. He stared at me before he slowly explained, “Because she’s pregnant and he doesn’t know what to do.” He watched my face, waiting to see some understanding. When he didn't, he began again, “Silvia, slow down and think. He’s doing his best to protect Nigel. She’s not keeping him anymore on her days off, yeah? Christ, Sil, he’s got the lad sleeping in the bed with him so he can keep an eye on him even at night! He comes home on his lunch and cleans the place every day. You don't see that because you're not there.”

“He needs to get that boy the hell away from her!”

“Silvia!” Oliver stared at me in disbelief. He really did not understand why I was not getting the point of what he was telling me. Sometimes he took his relationship with his brother for granted and forgot he was the only one in the world who could take Alexander and make him make sense, “We all know that, don’t we? But what you’re failing to see is the other baby! The one inside Melissa! He’s protecting that one the best he can as well! If he sends her packing, he sends her off with the other child!”

That stopped me. I looked at my husband from across the table and I was suddenly ashamed of myself for thinking that Alexander was being irresponsible. I had been so wrapped up in Nigel, the one I knew. The one I could see and hold. I hadn’t even thought of the little child inside of Melissa or what she might do to harm it if Alex pushed her too far.

What a delicate line he was dancing on. His situation was dangerous, far more dangerous than I'd considered and he wasn’t being an idiot at all. He was protecting his children. Both of them. God bless Alexander. For all of his faults, he was a loving and excellent father.

I looked up into my husband’s dark eyes. He saw the understanding in mine and smiled gently, “He’s doing the best he can, Sil. The best we can do to help him is allow him to keep doing it.”

I didn’t say much more after that. I waited and I worried instead. I kept Nigel five days a week and was shocked when Alexander rang my phone one day to tell me it would be Melissa who was going to collect him from my house.

“Why don’t I just bring him home then?” I asked, the bubbles rising in my stomach.

“Sil,” There was an element of desperation in his voice, “She’s doing better. Please. Just have him ready.”

“I'll have him ready,” I conceded.

“Thank you,” He breathed.

“Alexander?”

“Yes?”

I sighed, “Nothing. I just miss you. I wish you'd come round more often.”

“I miss you, too, Sil. I will come round. We'll speak soon, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I have to get back to work. Cheers, Bach.”

“Soon, Xander. Cheers.”

Melissa showed up at my door not an hour later. “I’m here to get my son,” She stressed the word ‘my’.

“He’s got a bit of a temperature,” I told her as I reluctantly handed him over.

“I’m sure I can handle it,” She snapped. Nigel fussed in her arms.

“I am sure you can,” I snapped back. I could feel my temperature rise, “However, being short in conversation and long in self-importance isn’t going to change the fact that he’s got explosive diarrhoea, too, is it?” She glowered at me. I glowered back, “Oliver brought him some medicine. It’s–” I stopped speaking. Melissa’s mouth was twisted and her eyes were narrow. Who the bloody hell did she think she was? Coming to my home after I’d cared for her son all day and disrespecting me with a look like that? I swear if she had not been holding that baby I’d have knocked her right in the chin. “Never mind,” I clipped the words off through my teeth, “I’ll ring Alex. He’s the one who does ninety-nine percent of the parenting.”

“Speaking of Alex,” She jerked the medicine from my hand, “Don’t call him. Ever. He’s got better things to do than talk to you.”

“What the hell is your problem today, Melissa? Wake up with your knickers drenched?”

“I don’t like the way you are with my husband!”

“I don’t like the way you are with your husband, either!”

“Mind your own business, Silvia!”

“Your husband is my business!”

She shifted Nigel in her arms. “You’ve got your own man!” Her voice was threatening, “Leave mine alone!”

“What are you going to do about it? Claw me with your false talons? I’d smear you from one end of the garden to the next!” It was all I could do not to poke her hard in the shoulder, but I resisted again for Nigel’s sake, “You go piss on yourself, Melissa! I won’t leave him alone! Alexander is family! What are you playing at?”

“I’m not playing at anything! I am telling you that Alexander is mine and you need to leave him alone! You can’t have them both!”

I was stunned for a second that she would say such an incredibly stupid thing, but it was only a second longer before I became angrier than I already was. She led with her chin that time, “Oh, aye! You’re a right eiri, aren’t you? Well, let me tell you something about the twins!” I leaned in and lifted myself on to my toes a bit so I was more even with her eyes. I dropped my voice, “If I wanted them both, I could have yours as well as mine in a heartbeat!” I was saying it to be cruel, no other reason, “So watch your step or I might have a go at your man and then you’ll know the true meaning of twincest!”

Melissa opened her mouth to say something, but shut it before she did. I knew she didn’t know what an eiri was and that I’d I'd lost her with my accent, but it was obvious that she'd gotten the meaning of my threat by the look on her face. I wished I could be there when she asked Alexander later and he told her I called her a snobbish, conceited whore. I wondered if she could figure out twincest on her own. I doubted it. Still, what I had said had stung her. I was quite pleased with that.

She tried her best to intimidate me with a glare, but it truly had no effect. I was so angry I would have slapped her in the face for it, but she was still holding Nigel. I could imagine not striking her full on and bouncing my palm off his little head. Lucky for all of us, I was clinging to self-control with everything I had. “Get out of my sight,” My voice was low even in my own ears, “Before I hurt you.”

Without another word she took her son and stomped off the porch and to her car. Duncan scrambled out behind her, barking at her heels all the way. I could hear Nigel screaming after I slammed the door. I felt bad about scaring him.

I do not think Melissa really had any idea of how badly she was messing things up with Alexander. I know she was that far gone. Or maybe she honestly didn’t care, but I find that hard to believe. If she would have listened to anything people were trying to tell her, the end result may have been different. Alexander really did try to make it a point to be romantic and loving, but Melissa, among her other issues, just did not understand the ways of the Welsh. Instead of relaxing her way into her new life in Wales and trying to figure out its rhythm, she tried to force her old ways on to her husband. It conflicted with his sensibilities and confused him, which left her frustrated and angry. She just couldn’t figure out how to get her balance, but to my knowledge she really never had any to begin with.

Part of me still wanted to help her for Alexander’s sake. He was trying desperately to hang on to a marriage that was rapidly dissolving into disaster. If she would have spoken to me civilly I would have tried to explain the dynamics of the Dickinson family. Although they didn’t always agree, the family was a united structure. Each member was respected and appreciated for their individually, encouraged to achieve their goals, and all were praised and loved equally. There were no favourites, there were no black sheep. Everyone had an important role and certain responsibilities, the first being that family was number one. And Melissa by her apparent disinterest and disregard for her new family’s culture, as well as her open dislike for me, was quickly landing herself on the outside of the inner circle.

“If she says one more bad thing to our Silvia,” Ana told Edmond on Christmas Eve as the three of us were getting trays, “I’m going to put her out in the snow!”

“Can I please beat her up in your front room, Dad?” I asked him sincerely, “Please? I promise I won’t break any furniture!”

“Settle down, Ladies!” Edmond took a tray of tarts from Ana, “It’s Christmas! Let’s try to enjoy ourselves!”

“Hard when I have to hear that sort of rubbish,” Ana muttered.

“Well, then you might like to know that your son, Oliver, just put a dead mouse into her coat pocket,” Edmond’s face was red with mirth as he suppressed his laughter.

“He did not!” I gasped.

“Oh, he did!” Edmond snorted with the effort of not bursting into a fit.

Ana didn’t even try to keep it in. She let loose a loud, silly giggle and cheered, “Hooray! I love that boy!”

“Yes, yes! We did a good job with him! Now, come on! Come on!”

Alexander brought Nigel over one morning early about three weeks later. He showed me the plans he had been drawing for expanding the cabin, “You’ll have three more rooms that can be used for bedrooms if needed. Oliver wants an office, too. We’re putting one room on the back, but the three we’re going to build on top of the additions we’ve already made. I’m leaving the front alone. It’s very old and I’m not dealing with the roof. I wanted to build two rooms on to the rear, but we can’t go back much more without clearing several trees. Oliver won’t have that, so we’ll go up instead. I have a new door here on the side,” He pointed at the plans with a pencil, “The stairs going up will actually be built outside, but we’ll enclose them. That way no one will have to walk through either bedroom to get upstairs.”

“I thought we were OK.” I looked at the plans, “It’s just Oliver, Caro, Duncan and me.”

He chewed his gum slowly. “You’ll have more children one day, yeah?”

“If nature allows. But why does Oliver want this done now?” I asked. Alex didn’t look at me. He scratched his head with the pencil. “OK, Alexander. What are you two planning that you’ve failed to tell me?”

He sighed, “Nothing. Oliver just wants it done. You know how he is when he gets something in his head. It’s got to be done right now, rush, rush. Linger and he’ll kill you. As for me, I just have a lot on my mind.”

“Do you want to talk? You seem more bothered than usual.”

“Yes, actually, I am,” He sighed again, “And I would like to talk. “

“Talk. “

“Melissa wants to go back.”

“Oh aye? What’s keeping her?”

“For the moment it’s pregnancy.” He paused. “And then nothing.”

“You’re building a room for Nigel, aren’t you?”

“Silvia, no, I told you…”

“Stop right there! I’ve no problem with Nigel having a room here or anywhere else, but I have a problem with your wife. I have from the moment I met her. I said it then and I’ll say it now. She’s not for you, Alexander. And she’s not fit to be a mother, either. She can go through the motions, but she can’t care for that boy like he needs to be cared for.”

Alexander looked up at the ceiling, “I agree.”

“You married her too soon,” I told him, “You could’ve waited. You could have not married her at all!”

“Oh, aye! But you weren’t there, were you?” He turned and looked straight at me, “And I had a big decision to make right quick-like, too. I could’ve left her, yeah? She might have chased me down for some support money or she might have let me go. Or she could have had an abortion and been done with it all. But there I was and at the time I saw something in her that’s not there now. She was sweet. Maybe not so clever, but she was warm and kind. So when I married her I was mad about her and inside her belly was a wee Dickinson. My child, Silvia! No Dickinson has ever left behind another Dickinson! I married her quick because my legal stay in the US was almost done. She’s my wife then so she didn’t argue about coming to Wales. She came out of obligation and something she thought was love. She had the baby and my son was born Welsh. In Wales. Do you get my meaning?”

“You made it so! You planned it!”

“Damned straight I did! Had I allowed my son to be born an American Citizen, do you think that when his dad and mum had enough of each other and I wanted to leave off for Wales they would let me take my son from the nation of his birth?”

“You knew it even then?”

“I knew we weren’t you and Ollie. You and Ollie, now, that’s a rare thing indeed. Melissa and I hadn’t been together long enough for me to know. I knew she had problems. She told me there were issues and I saw warning signs, but I didn’t think at first she and I could never see it through. I knew a couple of weeks after we got here that she wasn’t all right. I tried to make it better, but I only made it worse and it was obvious that something was seriously wrong after Nigel was born. She doesn’t want much to do with him, does she?”

“She’s a cow.”

“No, she isn’t. Don’t say that. I never told you and I should have. She’s ill. She has bi polar disorder. She’s been on medicine since she was nineteen only when she got pregnant she quit taking it. She didn’t want to hurt the baby. She’d only started to get back on it when she got pregnant again and she went right off.”

“Oh, Alexander! I’m sorry!” That suddenly made things loads more clear.

“She’s not right. She leans heavily toward the depressed, but the mania’s even worse. She doesn’t want anything to do with Nigel, but it’s not that she doesn’t love him. She just can’t love him correctly,” Alexander looked like he was a hundred years old, “All she does is cry and get angry at him or she gets excited and forgets about him. She hates herself for it, but she really can't help it. She’s afraid she’ll hurt him. She hates you because you do what she can’t. She’s got this ridiculous notion that you and I are lovers or at least we want to be. And we should not have gotten pregnant so soon, but we got arseholed one night and weren’t careful and…” He trailed off, “You know how it goes,” He shook his head, “She’s unstable. I’m afraid to leave for work because she’s tried to kill herself. I never know what I’m coming home to. Most nights she’s happy to see me and then ten minutes later she’s swinging at my head. She punches me closed fists. Not that it hurts mostly, but her hitting me like that in front of our son? Or she locks herself in the loo and sobs for hours. She’s impossible to live with.”

“How horrible.” I had been so caught up in the thought of Nigel not being safe that I'd forgotten what Alexander must have been going through emotionally. He was so unhappy standing there talking to me that day, so drained of the energy that he'd always exuded. Alexander, mouthy and rebellious his whole life, was now a man heavy laden with burden and responsibility, trapped in a situation he had no idea of how to successfully escape.

“She doesn’t want the baby,” He continued, “She’s not at all excited about it. She refused her ultrasound. I have to force her to appointments. She doesn’t even want to discuss names. All she talks about is going to the US after she has it and being with her friends and her family.”

“She’s having the baby and then taking holiday?”

Alexander didn’t look at me. “She’s divorcing me, Sil.”

“What?”

“After what I just told you you’re surprised?”

“Well, with two wee babies that’s the last thing I expected to hear!”

He nodded. “Bit sick, yeah? But so is she. She’s sick, not evil. She thinks it’s the right thing to do. I tried to tell her that I’d stick with her. All she has to do is have the baby and get back on medicine and we’d work together until we had it right, but she says no. She’s going back state side as soon as the baby’s born.”

I was not quite sure what to say, “Are you contesting the divorce?”

“I can’t stop her from leaving. If she leaves, and she will, what’s the point? No, I think Melissa and I are divorcing straight away.”

“Before she has the baby?”

“Yes, she wants the marriage ended as soon as possible. I don’t want to, but I’m not going to fight her. I’ve tried to help her and I’ve accepted that there’s nothing I can do. I told her I’d give her the divorce without any argument, but I’m keeping both of the children.”

“What did she say about that?”

“She cried for about an hour and then she went to bed. I do know that I can keep my children in Wales, at least. She can’t leave and take my children, too. Not without my saying so.”

“She’s far gone then. I’ll tell you for nothing that you’d have to pry Carolena out of my cold stiff arms. I’d fight until I was dead before I’d leave her for a day.”

“Yes, and you love your child. She does hers, too, in a way that I can’t understand.” There was a sadness I’d never seen in Alexander before, “There won’t be a fight if she goes home without them. If she doesn’t come back I won’t bother her ever again. If she comes back it’s just as well for everyone. I still want custody. She’s too unpredictable to keep the children.”

“You’re a good dad.”

“I am! And Melissa…I just don’t understand why she won’t stay and get help. I can raise the children, I know I can. But a child needs a mother!”

“I’ll do it then.” I said a little too quickly, “I want them. I mean, I know that they’re your children, but with a couple more rooms on top they could just stay here. You could stay as well. And all the children could be raised right and proper here in the wood.”

I looked down at Nigel and Carolena who were sleeping together on a blanket. Duncan lie about a foot away, opening one eye from time to time to check on them. They were angels. Little bundles of magic, they both were. Funny how a fifteen pound runt of a litter meant to keep them safe and close while Nigel’s own mother was walking away. What a fool she was.

Alexander was staring at me with a look that I could not place.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Melissa’s not so off base,” He said softly, “I love you so much, Sil. I always have. You’re my brother’s wife. You were Oliver’s wife long before you married him, but I love you, too. It’s like this ache right here,” He rubbed his sternum, “Every now and again when I look at you or I think of you, it actually hurts. It’s been a bit disturbing the way I’ve felt sometimes,” He smiled, “Don‘t look sickened! The truth is that I’m jealous because Oliver has you through and through. I’ve never seen anybody love anybody the way you love him. I used to wonder if the hurt was because I was in love with you, too-like… like, really, really in love with you. Now I wonder if it’s not just jealousy because no one’s ever loved me like you love him. Or maybe I’m just a man who’s not used to being ignored and recognizes a woman that has always been out of his reach. Maybe deep down from time to time I’m tempted by the challenge? No matter. I’d never try. The thought of being romantic with you is just too weird,” He shuddered, “Plus I’d never do that to my brother and you’d just crush me anyway. But whatever it is, I know that I love you and it‘s obvious to Melissa as well. She takes it to a different place than we do, she makes it a bad thing. It's not a bad thing. You’re my sister, yeah? What she thinks is all wrong. Still, I’d be honoured to call you mother to my children.”

“It would be an honour to mother them, Alexander. And I love you, too.” I looked at him carefully for a second, digesting all he had said. We‘d been friends for so long that I had been aware of his affection without him telling me about it. Nothing he had said took me by any surprise. “Only it’s not confusing for me how I feel about you. It never has been.”

“I know!” He grinned, “And that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Could you imagine the mess we’d be in if it ever had been?”

It would turn out that this divorce was something that Melissa had been mulling over for nearly as long as Nigel had been alive. The plans to change the house, however, had been something Oliver had mentioned before the idea of having Alexander and the children move in had come up. Xander, however, thought it better that he and the children still keep their own home, which I thought was a bit silly.

It was only two days after Melissa gave Alexander the divorce proposal that she moved out. She left her son with his father and she rarely checked in. It was the hospital that called Alex on a Sunday afternoon five weeks later to tell him that he had a new baby daughter who was born the morning before.

Oliver and I raced to the hospital to see her. We peered at her through the nursery window. It wasn’t a good view, but there she was, our little niece, sleeping peacefully.

Oliver held a fussy Carolena. “Shush, Caro,” He tried to put the pacifier into her mouth and she spat it out, “She’s getting teeth, Love,” He told me as he peered into her mouth, “About three of them all at once from how it appears. Two on the bottom and one on top.”

“I know. She’s drooling and chewing on everything.” I wiped dirt off of Nigel’s nose, “Look at your new niece in there! Poor little baby all alone! She’s not even named!”

“Alexander won’t allow her to go anonymous for long,” Oliver peered through the glass, “Maybe she’s named and we just don’t know it.”

It was just then that Alexander rounded the corner, “Well, it’s done.”

“What’s done?” Ollie turned to his brother and asked.

“She’s signed the final papers. She’s going,” He looked down at Nigel, “And that’s that. My attorney’s faxing them over to the US tomorrow. I’ve filled out the birth certificate as well. Melissa’s agreed to leave the children with me. She didn’t really have a choice, not if she wanted to go home.” We watched a nurse enter the nursery and lift the baby into her arms. She walked out of the room with her. “And now I get to meet my daughter.”

“What name did you give her?” I lifted Nigel, who was reaching for Alex.

“I’m calling her Natalie,” Alexander looked older than his father as he stroked Nigel’s hair, “Hey, Buddy! You’ve got yourself a little sister! Natalie Christine! Want to meet her?”

He was about to say something else when the nurse came around with the baby. “Here you go, Dad!” She stopped in her step, “Doctor Dickinson!”

Alexander took a step forward and relieved her of her burden, “That’s Doctor Dickinson,” He motioned to Oliver with his head, “I’m his twin. The good looking one. Hello, Natalie, my love,” He pulled the blankets away from her chin and peered into her little face, “Hello, Muffin! It’s me, your dad! And this is Nigel! He’s your big brother! Oh, hello! You’re beautiful, aren’t you? You look just like your Mummy! So beautiful, aren’t you?” He kissed her gently and wandered off for a private moment, speaking to her in Welsh whispers.

The nurse laughed nervously, “Oh!” She said to Oliver, “I didn’t know you were a twin! Identical, too!”

“We prefer mono-zygotic, but close enough, Millie,” Oliver smiled and moved to look at the baby. “Silvia,” He called gently, “You have to see her! We have someone very special here!”

I rushed over and put my hand against Alexander's biceps. He turned and lowered her so I have a peek.

Oh, she was lovely. I’d never seen a full term baby so tiny. She was pale as snow, her pointed little head covered in thick honey coloured hair. “She’s truly beautiful,” I told Alexander, thinking she looked like one of the babies from the covers of magazines. “She’s amazing. Look at those fingers! Long and slender…she has your hands, Xander.”

“This,” Alexander whispered as tears began to stream down his cheeks. He took Natalie‘s little hand and she curled her tiny fingers around his thumb, “Is the most important woman I’m ever going to meet. This is the one who‘s going to teach me what love is all about.”

Oliver patted his brother on the back. None of us said another thing.

Even though he said he was not moving in, that night there were three babies and one Duncan sleeping in the nursery and Alexander sleeping on our sofa. It stayed that way until spring when a new top went on to the back of our little cabin. And then there were three babies and one Duncan in the nursery and Alexander sleeping in the smallest room upstairs.