Текст книги "Lost and Found"

Автор книги: Kelly Jamieson

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Текущая страница: 8 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

Chapter Fifteen

Saturday night. Derek announced that he’d invited friends over for drinks and a dip in the hot tub. Nate had managed to keep himself out of Krissa and Derek’s way while he wrestled with the dilemma of what to do about Derek’s shocking suggestion. He had to get a car. He could drive with the sunglasses on, and being stuck there at their home all day was driving him crazy. His fingers itched to pick up a camera and start shooting. In fact, he longed to photograph Krissa, her expressive face eyes full of longing and sadness, hope and excitement.

“I don’t think you know Steve and Kim,” Derek said.

“No, I don’t.”

Krissa seemed unenthusiastic that they were coming over, but said nothing. She’d been very quiet any time Nate had seen her since they’d talked about the…uh…sperm donation.

Their friends arrived shortly after eight o’clock and they all went out onto the deck. Krissa served margaritas and set out bowls of chips with salsa and guacamole in pretty Mexican-style pottery dishes.

Derek and Steve launched into a business discussion. Steve was another salesman. His wife Kim sat in the last rays of the sun, her blonde hair gleaming, tanned skin smooth. She had big, jutting tits that Nate could tell were enhanced, and a body honed by frequent workouts. Pink gloss shone on her full lips. Attractive if slightly fake. She and Krissa didn’t have much to say to each other.

“I’m ready to get in that hot tub,” Steve announced.

“Yeah, me too.” Derek stood. He’d turned up the heat and removed the cover earlier. Nate hadn’t yet been in the hot tub. It would have been a good way to ease some of the tension he’d felt since he’d arrived there. Hell, he’d been tense before he arrived, but walking into Krissa and Derek’s life hadn’t exactly helped that. Now he had more problems than he’d started with.

Krissa and Kim rose and walked over to the hot tub. Krissa trailed a hand through the water. “That’s nice,” she said. Derek pulled his golf shirt off over his head and started undoing his fly.

Taken aback, Nate had expected everyone to go change into swimsuits. He watched as Derek shucked shorts and underwear and stepped naked into the bubbling water. Steve followed.

Nate stood up. “Coming in, buddy?” Derek called to him.

“Uh. Yeah.” His attention was distracted by the sight of Kim’s tanned body being revealed as she removed her clothing. She had startling tan lines. Apparently she wore a very tiny bikini when she tanned. Her melon-like breasts had small strips of white over the centers of them. Large round nipples must almost have been revealed by the bathing suit. Tiny white strips at each hip and a white triangle over her bare mound hinted at a minuscule bottom.

Nate swallowed. He didn’t find her all that attractive but still, seeing a naked woman that close up couldn’t help but affect him. He glanced at Krissa and heat swept over him as he realized she was watching him watch Kim.

Krissa’s fingers worked at the buttons of the sleeveless shirt she wore and Nate’s mouth went dry. Seeing a stranger strip was bad enough but watching Krissa disrobe… Jesus God.

She slipped the shirt off her shoulders, still watching him. Kim stepped into the tub and joined the men, the water bubbling around their shoulders. “This is nice,” she purred. “Steve, we have to get one of these.”

“We should,” he agreed. He sipped the margarita he’d set on the wooden bench near the tub.

Nate couldn’t have dragged his eyes away from Krissa if the big earthquake had struck at that moment, dropping them into the Pacific Ocean. She opened the button of the denim skirt she wore, tugged down the short zipper and then pushed it down over her hips. She bent and picked up the skirt, clad only in white panties and bra. Pink bows sat on each hip bone and between her breasts.

Her breasts were all natural, full and soft and round. She set the skirt on the chair where she’d been sitting and reached behind her for the clasp of her bra.

Pressure built in Nate, his body taut and trembling. When Krissa dropped the bra, exposing her breasts to the evening air, his breath stuck in his throat. Her nipples were high, small and puckered tightly, a pretty rose color that matched the bows of her panties. Sliding her thumbs under the strings at each hip, she shimmied out of the underwear and stood before him completely naked.

His vision swam and he realized he hadn’t been breathing. He choked on an inhalation. Krissa still looked at him. Jesus Christ. Nate’s eyes shifted to the hot tub where Derek sat and watched them.

“Come on, Nate,” Krissa invited softly.

She was perfect. Beautiful. Smooth and lithesome. He couldn’t get air into his lungs.

Were they doing this deliberately? Trying to get him so horny he’d agree to fuck Krissa?

Nate set his drink down on the small table beside his chair and yanked his T-shirt off. Krissa had lit candles as the sun had lowered, and he didn’t need the sunglasses any more, but tonight he wanted to keep them on. He needed a shield, needed the protection the lenses gave him.

He stepped out of his shorts, excruciatingly aware of Krissa’s eyes on him. She’d stepped nearer the tub, then climbed in, still watching him. He’d never been self conscious about his body. He was an athlete, years of his life devoted to swimming, cycling and running. He’d lived much of his life at the beach, wearing next to nothing, and he’d admit to skinny dipping in pools or the ocean a few times. But at that moment, he was aware of every muscle moving, felt stiff and jerky as he stepped toward the tub.

His glanced skidded over the others. Steve and Kim hadn’t even cast a look his way, seemed oblivious. They talked, sipped their drinks and laughed. Derek’s eyes moved from Krissa to Nate and back again.

He wanted to call Derek on it. He hadn’t changed a bit since college. They’d indulged in some pretty wild times, and while Derek had accused him of liking to watch, Nate knew it was more the other way around. Derek liked to watch—and there’d been many a night where Nate and Sue had put on a show for him.

Yeah, sometimes Nate liked to watch. But he liked to be watched, too. And Krissa’s intent gaze had his dick swelling to a massive erection.

He quickly submerged himself in the stinging water, sure nobody else was sporting a huge boner like he was. Krissa slid in, between him and Kim.

Krissa sighed and leaned her head back. “The stars are so pretty,” she murmured. Nate gulped, at a loss for words.

Steam swirled and rose around them, blurring Derek’s face across the tub like a soft focus lens. The pungent scent of chlorine tickled Nate’s nose, and the heated water bubbled and churned against his skin.

“Isn’t this nice?” Krissa asked him

“It’s great,” he choked. He wished he hadn’t left his drink out of reach. He needed it. His glasses steamed up but he didn’t care, didn’t want to see anything.

That was a lie. He had to force himself not to turn and look at Krissa, sitting there naked right beside him, within touching distance. If he moved his leg, he could touch her.

He closed his eyes against the desire that swamped him. And then he noticed Kim and Steve moving closer. Steve bent his head and Kim turned her face up and they kissed. Not just a peck. A long, open-mouthed kiss.

Nate looked at Derek. He watched the couple kiss with avid eyes. Nate risked a glance at Krissa, wondering if she watched, too.

She was watching him.

Their eyes met, and he didn’t think she could really see his behind the dark glasses but he shivered inside anyway. They communicated wordlessly and he sensed her question, her doubt, her desire.

How they hell was he supposed to say no to her?

He sank lower into the eddying water, letting a jet pound into the muscles of his back. Fuck. He was in big trouble. Especially when Krissa’s hand found his thigh under the water.

Startled he looked down. He couldn’t even see their bodies under the white foam, so he didn’t expect the others could either. But still…Derek sat right there, and she had her hand on his thigh, dangerously close to being able to feel exactly how aroused he was.

Kim and Steve continued to make out, tongues licking each other, mouths sliding, opening. Kim reached an arm up to her husband’s shoulder, exposing her breasts. Water swirled around them.

Dispassionately, Nate realized he didn’t like Kim’s breasts. Too big, too fake, the nipples looked stretched and distorted. They almost repulsed him.

He had to look. He had to see Krissa’s perfect tits again. He let his eyes search them out in the roiling foam and, as if sensing his regard, she lifted up slightly so he could see them, her fingers digging into his quadriceps. Jesus.

He was dissolving, the heat and motion of the water melting hm. He felt as if his body was spinning away from him in the twirling currents, lost, helpless.

“You’re doing this on purpose,” he choked out.

Krissa didn’t smile. Just looked at him. “Yes.”

“Derek.” The one world held a million questions.

Her big eyes responded wordlessly. He closed his.

He was going to sleep with his friend’s wife.

Chapter Sixteen

“When are we going to do this?”

Krissa smiled as she folded the towels she’d taken out of the dryer. The towels they’d all used last night after emerging from the hot tub, warm and wet and…hot.

She turned to Nate. His shaggy curls were rumpled, glasses shielding his eyes, as usual, from close scrutiny. He thrust his hands into the pockets of baggy cargo shorts, big shoulders hunched.

“Do what?” she asked.

He growled.

“I’m teasing.” She set down the folded towel on the stack, and laid her hand there. “I’m using an ovulation kit to tell me when.”

“Oh.” Discomfort flitted across his face. It was almost fun to tease him with all these personal details. She’d gotten so used to revealing every intimate particular of her menstrual cycles to Derek and about a hundred health care professionals, it no longer bothered her.

“I’m going to test this morning, and tonight. If it’s positive I’ll be ovulating in twenty-four hours. My periods have always been kind of wacky so I start testing a few days before I expect to be ovulating.”

“So if it’s positive today we don’t have sex until…when? Tuesday?”

“Monday night. And Tuesday. And maybe Wednesday.”

“Jesus.”

She laughed, moved closer to him. “You can handle it, big boy.”

She slid her hands up his chest to his shoulders. His body tightened beneath her palms. She wished she knew if it was a good tightening or a bad tightening. She wanted those glasses gone so she could see what he was thinking.

“Krissa…” He put his hands on her waist and set her away from him. She sighed. Okay, it was a bad tightening.

“Nate, if you don’t want to do this, please say so now.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to do it.”

“We have to talk about this. Derek’s downstairs working out. It’s just you and me, so be honest. Things are going to get very weird if we’re not honest with each other.”

“Have you done this before?”

She blinked. “Done what? Slept with another man?”

“Yes.”

“No.” She frowned. “Of course not.”

“There’s no ‘of course’ about it. You invited friends over last night and practically had an orgy in your hot tub. Why wouldn’t I think that maybe you guys have all…”

“I haven’t had sex with another man,” she said quietly, looking down at her hands. “But I have with another woman.”

She heard his sharp intake of air.

“With Kim?”

Krissa nodded. “Does that disgust you?”

“Christ, no! But…”

“I’m not a lesbian,” she said through a faint smile. “Or bisexual. Derek’s your friend. You figure it out.”

“He wanted you to do it.” She watched his face, below the glasses, the square shape of his jaw, the way the firm curve of his lips moved as he talked, his smooth skin.

“Yes.”

“He wanted to watch.”

“Yes.”

“He’s going to watch us, isn’t he?”

“I don’t know. He hasn’t said that. Would that make a difference to you?”

“I…don’t know.”

“He said you guys have done it before.”

Derek nodded, pressed his lips closed. “A long time ago. Christ, a lifetime ago. We were horny college students.”

Krissa wondered if Derek watching would ease Nate’s conscience about sleeping with her, or make him feel even worse. “Tell me,” she said. “You have to tell me how you feel about this.”

He shrugged. “There’s nothing to say. It’s no big deal. It’s just a sperm donation. Right?”

Krissa stared at him. “Right.” She blinked. Is that really how he felt? “I certainly wouldn’t want you to do something that’s clearly repulsive to you.” She started to walk by him, not wanting to stick around and say something she might regret.

He grabbed her wrist, his fingers hard. She looked up at him. His mouth was a grim line of annoyance, his jaw tight. “Krissa. Don’t walk away from me.”

Her mouth dropped open. “What?”

“Don’t walk away.” He tugged her hand and she tried to yank it out of his grasp but he held tight.

“Let go of me.”

“No. Krissa. Don’t give in that easy. You’re pissed off at me. Stay and fight.”

“Whaaat!” Nobody in her life had ever said that to her. She’d walked away from many conflicts, always thought it was the best thing to do. She hated arguing, hated the sick feeling she got from the tension.

“You heard me. Say what you want to say.” His voice rasped.

“I’m not going to beg you to sleep with me. If it’s that difficult for you, I’m not going to force you.”

“Oh, God.” He rubbed his mouth. “Krissa. The problem is, it’s not difficult.” He paused and looked at her.

She met his eyes, through the dark glasses. “Oh.” Did he mean…?

He tugged again on her hand, and his arms snared her, strong and hard, held her up against his body. She gasped and flattened her palms on his hard chest. His heart thudded beneath her hand, strong and sure. She was so close to him she could see the morning stubble he hadn’t yet bothered to shave, felt his breath against her forehead, saw her own reflection in his dark lenses, her mouth an astonished O, eyes wide.

Her hands slid to his shoulders. His chest pressed against her breasts and her nipples hardened. His mouth brushed hers. Not a kiss. He spoke, so close to her their breath mingled. “I want you, Krissa. I don’t want to want you, but I do.” He shifted his hips and his erection rubbed against her stomach. Everything inside her went hot and liquid. She whimpered. “It won’t be a hardship to fuck you, Krissa.” His crude words made her tummy flip. “That’s not what I’m worried about.”

“What are you worried about?”

“That’s the part I haven’t figured out yet,” he muttered. He brushed his mouth over hers again and stepped back, released her. She stood there, chest heaving, heart racing. She swallowed.

“Right now,” she whispered. “I want it right now.” More than anything. The intensity of her desire for Nate rushed over her and shocked her.

He stared back at her, breathing fast. “See. That’s the problem. We’re not supposed to want this. We’re supposed to be making a baby. Procreating. Artificial insemination without the artificial part.”

She choked on a laugh.

“This is supposed to be clinical and calculated. For one reason only—to get you pregnant.”

She pressed a hand to her quivering belly.

“It’s not supposed to fun. Or enjoyable. Or…hot.”

He put a hand on her cheek, cupped her face. She stared up at him.

“So, just tell me when and I’ll be there to do my duty.” He gave her his back and walked out. She stood there, a trembling mass of ragged nerves and aching yearning. She touched her lips as Nate walked away.

She sank onto a chair, sat there for a long time, eyes closed. What was she doing? She’d been acting strange ever since Derek proposed this crazy idea. She wanted it. She wanted Nate. She wanted the baby he could give her. But at what cost?

She stood up on shaky legs and went downstairs. Derek was running on the treadmill. Sweat glistened on his face.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” she asked him.

He didn’t need to ask what she meant. “Why? Aren’t you?”

She hesitated. She had a hundred questions chasing each other through her mind but was almost afraid to ask them. Maybe she was afraid of the answers.

“You know I’ll do it if you want,” she said carefully. Of course he knew that. Their whole life was like that.

“But…?”

She shook her head. “I just want to make sure you’re okay with it. Because…you’re the one who…Derek, I’ll be having sex with another man.”

“I know, Krissa.” Derek’s feet pounded on the rubber mat of the treadmill in a solid rhythm. He swiped a hand across his forehead. Krissa sucked on her bottom lip, watched him run.

“Okay.”

She could have asked more questions, told Derek all her fears, but he clearly didn’t want to hear them. Fine.

That evening when she tested her urine, it showed a surge in her luteinizing hormone. She would ovulate in the next twenty-four to thirty-six hours.

Without thinking about it, she went first to find Nate. He sat in his dimly lit bedroom reading a book.

“Isn’t it hard to read in the dark?” she asked, leaning on the door frame of his room. He’d spread his things out around it, making it look completely different than the bare extra bedroom it had been before he’d arrived. She could even smell the difference—Nate’s musky after shave and his own unique scent. They’d bought the house with five bedrooms, anticipating the family they would eventually have.

“Yeah.” He closed the book. “But I’m bored out of my fucking mind and the only way I can read is if the light isn’t too bright.”

“I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry about?”

She sighed, stepped further into the room. “I’m sorry you’re going through this.”

He rubbed his eyes. Without his dark glasses he looked different. She’d gotten so used to seeing him with them on all the time. Without them, he looked…vulnerable. Her heart squeezed. She desperately wished there was something she could do to make it better for him. Instead, all she was doing was complicating his life.

“It’s not your fault,” he said.

“I know. I just feel bad.” Silence expanded between them. “I…uh…came to tell you that I’ll be ovulating in twenty-four hours.”

“Ah. Okay.”

“So, tomorrow night.”

“Yeah.” He shook his head. “It makes it weird, doesn’t it? When you have to plan it down to the minute?”

She nodded slowly. “Oh, yeah. You have no idea. We’ve been doing this for years.”

“Christ.”

She lifted her shoulders.

“Uh…where…?”

She inhaled slowly. “I don’t know.”

He tipped his head. “I think we need to have Derek in on this. Did you tell him?”

She blew out the breath she’d just taken in. “No.” Her first though had been Nate.

“Let’s go find him.” Nate tossed the book aside and swung his long legs to the floor. He wore a pair of plaid knee length shorts and nothing else. His abs rippled as he rose up, and her eyes moved from there to his broad, smooth chest, the flat brown discs of his nipples, the dark hair between.

“Okay. I think he’s out in the hot tub.”

“Great.”

She led the way through the house out onto the deck, the sky a deep midnight blue just after sunset, the mountains silhouetted blackly against it, the ocean the same hue as the sky. The lights of the oil rigs winked in the distance.

“Hey, buddy,” Nate said. Derek opened his eyes.

“Hey. Coming in?”

Nate glanced at Krissa. “Sure, why not?” His hands went to the button below his navel and her mouth went dry. Why would he bother with a swimsuit? After the other night, he was fully aware that they never bothered, and it was certain Derek was in there completely naked.

Nate’s back was to her as he slid the shorts down over his hips and thighs and stepped out of them. He wore no underwear. His broad back curved sleekly into two deep indentations just above his ass, which was tight and pale compared to the deep tan on the rest of his body. His long muscular legs carried him closer to the hot tub and he sat on the edge and swung them over and into the water.

He glanced over his shoulder and Krissa’s cheeks grew warm as he caught her staring at him. “Coming in, Krissa?”

She couldn’t do it. For the last two days, all she’d been thinking about was sex. She vibrated with it, ached for it, and getting in the hot tub with two gorgeous naked men would kill her. “No,” she choked. “Not tonight.”

Nate’s glance lingered on her, then he turned and slid into the churning water. She could just hear his sigh of pleasure above the motor of the spa, and it twisted something low inside her.

Krissa pulled up one of the cushioned wicker chairs closer to the tub. “We need to talk to you, Derek,” she said. Derek’s head jerked around.

“We?”

“Um.” Had that sounded bad? Like she and Nate had been plotting behind his back? “I did the ovulation test. It shows an LH surge.”

“Okay. That’s good.”

“Tomorrow night we need to…it’s a good time…”

“Yeah. Okay.” Derek stretched his arms out on either side of him along the rim of the tub. Krissa glanced at Nate.

“How do you want to do this, Derek?” Nate spoke up. “You need to be involved in this.”

She flashed Nate a grateful look. Derek nodded slowly. “Yeah.”

“You should be there, with us,” Nate said quietly. Krissa’s tummy clenched. Could she do this?

If it would give her a baby, she’d do almost anything.

“Yeah,” Derek said again and she tried to reach his expression. He looked…excited.

Relief softened her body. If Derek was going to be tense about this, it would make it really difficult. Given his mild kink, it seemed he might actually be turned on by the whole thing.

Derek looked at her. “Okay, Krissa?”

She nodded, her fingers playing with the hem of her shorts. “Okay.”