Текст книги "Accidentally, Love"
Автор книги: Kate Harper
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Текущая страница: 10 (всего у книги 11 страниц)
As he listened to the banter between the two sisters he reflected that the Hathaways appeared to be an unusually close family. Millie was obviously a handful. Despite the fact that he had zero experience with young females, even he had been taken aback by some of her artless observations the night before. He had been particularly impressed by the manner in which the girl had delicately, but persistently, enraged his stepmother. Clearly, it was better to be on good terms with Millicent Hathaway for he imagined she would make an uncomfortably cunning opponent.
After the arrival of Audrey, he found that he lost all interest in food. Today, he couldn’t manage to keep his eyes off her. She looked singularly lovely in a blue morning gown, her tawny hair simply dressed, several curls curling around her slender neck. He imaged how it would be to kiss that neck, to trail his lips down the length of it. Her skin was silky smooth, he recalled. How would she react if he kissed her neck? Would she close her eyes and utter that small, telltale groan that he had edged out of her once before? He was sure that he could encourage that sound again, and quite a few others besides as he made love to her.
‘Kirkwood!’
His brother’s voice again. Darius came back to himself with a jolt and looked at Roddy. ‘Yes?’
‘Are you quite all right?’ Beth inquired, an expression of concern on her face.
‘Indeed.’ He forced a smile. This was ridiculous! If he did not manage to take himself in hand they would all think him entirely mad.
‘You haven’t been listening to us,’ Millie explained, eying him curiously. ‘Lord Allingham has been talking to you for ages.’
‘Has he? Perhaps he should have shouted.’ Darius made a sudden decision. There was no point in putting things off. Soon, both Judith and Lady Hathaway would come downstairs and discussions about their plans to escape The Drunken Maiden would commence. If he was going to make a damned fool of himself, it would be better to get on with it. He rose to his feet and looked at Miss Hathaway who was, like everybody else at the table, watching him with some bewilderment. ‘Miss Hathaway, may I speak to you in private for a few moments?’
There was a rather stunned silence. Gentlemen did not speak to young, unmarried ladies in private. It simply wasn’t the done thing at all.
‘In private?’ she repeated, as if she had not heard correctly.
‘Yes, Miss Hathaway. By that, I mean without anybody present.’ He inclined his head towards Millie. ‘Although you are more than welcome to wait outside the door if it would help with the proprieties of the situation.’
‘It wouldn’t,’ Beth said with some certainty. ‘Mr. Kirkwood, whatever are you about?’
‘Call me Darius, please. And I am about to make an ass of myself, something that I would prefer to do with an audience of one.’ He met Audrey’s eyes. ‘Miss Hathaway?’
Slowly, Audrey dropped her napkin on the table and stood up. Beth Fielding looked at her with troubled blue eyes. ‘Miss Hathaway!’
‘We shall not be long,’ Audrey said, sounding more or less composed. There was a tremor in her voice but there was also an air of resolution about her and his heart soared in response. ‘Millie, you will stay in the hallway and… and knock if Mama or Isabella come downstairs.’
Millie rose with alacrity. ‘Very well.’
‘Really,’ Roddy was looking from one face to the other, completely bewildered by this sudden turn of events. ‘I don’t understand. Darius, why do you want to be private with Miss Hathaway? It is most inadvisable.’
‘It is,’ Darius agreed, holding out his arm as Audrey came around the table. Without a word, she laid a hand on his coat sleeve. ‘It is madness and I should certainly be horsewhipped and I promise to give you the opportunity later but for now, I need to see Miss Hathaway alone.’
He left the pair still quibbling behind him, guiding Audrey to the parlor they had spent the previous evening in, Millie following along behind like a small, inquisitive satellite. They paused in the door and Audrey turned to her sister.
‘Remember, join us if -’
‘I know, if Mama or Isabella come along. Don’t worry,’ Millie assured her, ‘I promise I shall do so. Scream if you need me,’ she added, giving Darius a look that suggested it would be very unwise if he made her sister scream. He inclined his head in acknowledgement.
Then, closing the door quietly, he turned and looked at Audrey.
Chapter Seven
Audrey could only wonder at her own behavior. That she could disregard the proprieties enough to agree to see a man alone…
Millie is just outside the door, she reminded herself.
As if that counted for anything.
She was unchaperoned and in the presence of a very dangerous man.
A shiver of delight rippled through her.
‘Sir,’ she said, sounding breathless. ‘This is hardly a sensible thing to do.’
He was silent for a long moment, then she heard him sigh. ‘I stopped being sensible the night I met you,’ he said quietly, moving forward a few steps. Disappointingly, he left some space between them. It was probably just as well. ‘Miss Hathaway, I am in a quandary.’
Audrey looked up at him, his face so familiar to her despite the fact that they were as good as strangers. It did not feel as if they were strangers. For all that she had struggled with her feelings for him, for her desire for him, she had suddenly discovered in the breakfast room that she did not want to struggle any more. Darius Kirkwood was certainly not the man she had envisioned would sweep her off her feet but if she had learned anything in the past four months, it was that expectations could change in the space of an hour.
‘In what way are you in a quandary, Sir?’
‘I met a girl some months ago who has caused me considerable perturbation of the spirits.’
‘Indeed? That is most unfortunate. And yet you did not seek this girl out?’
‘I did not immediately see that there was any need to. I thought that the feelings she had stirred in me would pass, given time.’
Could he hear the beating of her heart? She could, for it reverberated through her body with resounding force. ‘I see. But it did not pass?’
‘No, Miss Hathaway. It did not pass.’
‘Perhaps,’ she observed, ‘you should have sought this girl out when you found that you continued to think of her? To clarify your feelings.’
‘I did go looking for her,’ he admitted. ‘And several times I found her but she was sensible enough not to get caught out again by importunate gentlemen who might imperil her reputation.’
‘You could have come to say hello,’ she suggested softly. ‘It would have thrown her into some confusion but I do believe it would not have been unwelcome.’
He took a half step closer, just a half step but it closed the distance between them a little bit more. ‘You don’t understand. I didn’t understand, until this morning. I thought that I just wanted another kiss, the last one,’ he added, voice thickening a little, ‘having been so very remarkable.’
The idea that he wanted to kiss her again was hardly surprising but the knowledge still sent a thrill of triumph through her. ‘But that is not the case?’
‘No. One kiss would be delightful but I am afraid it would not be nearly enough to satisfy.’
He wants to seduce me. And I want him to seduce me… I cannot recall wanting anything so much in my entire life. But surely not here and not now! ‘What are you suggesting, Sir?’ she inquired, searching his face.
A curious stillness seemed to come over him. ‘In a perfect world, I would be able to ask for your hand in marriage, Miss Hathaway. I have money enough to keep us, property enough to provide for a family and sense enough to learn how to be a decent husband. But I am unable to give you what you deserve the most, which is the approbation of Society. For no matter how much I might want to offer you my name, I am and can only ever be, a bastard.’
Audrey stared at him, transfixed. ‘You wish to marry me?’ she breathed.
‘Believe me,’ he muttered, lips twisting, ‘I am as shocked by the fact as you are. I have never contemplated the act until now but I find I cannot offer anything less. I only hope that you can countenance such an impudent suggestion. I know that you deserve somebody like my brother but I’m damned if I am not going to fight for a chance to have you for myself, no matter how undeserving I may be.’
She continued to stare at him, chaotic thoughts tumbling through her head. A single one coalesced. ‘You wish to marry me?’
He winced. ‘Dear God, you really don’t think very much of me if you believed I brought you in here to ravish you. I suppose I have given you good reason, however. I admit in the past I have been more intent on seducing than settling down.’
‘I thought -’ she paused, trying to collect herself. She had thought precisely that, which was that he had intended to seduce her. And she had followed him without a word of protest. ‘You really wish to marry me?’
‘That is just one of the things I wish to do with you,’ he confessed. The rest is possibly just as wicked as you imagined. I will understand if you refuse me, of course. I am not,’ he added with a twist of the lips, ‘considered much of a catch.’
It took a moment before she understood what he meant but then she had it. He was talking about the fact that he was one of Society’s outsiders; a gentleman, well educated and with numerous financial advantages but one inescapable disadvantage. He was illegitimate and therefore, considered unsuitable for any but the most desperate female. She realized something else at the precise same moment. It had taken a great deal of courage to make an offer that he was certain would be rejected.
It was, she reflected, time to revise her plans. She had hoped to meet a man who was strong and courageous, intelligent and kind. She had yet to have the opportunity to explore every facet of Mr. Kirkwood’s nature but she already knew most of it, although she could not say how she knew. He was a good man. He cared for his family, a family that had cared very little for him in return. He had behaved honorably, sending her out of harm’s way when a lesser man would have taken advantage. She had been looking for that one man, somebody to pin her hopes and her heart on, determined not to be misdirected by anything so trivial as desire.
But he had been right there, all along, the one man she could not forget after just one kiss. Stepping forward, Audrey reached out to him and cradled his face between her palms.
‘You honor me, Sir.’
‘The hell I do,’ he retorted, but his own hands came up to slide around her wrists. ‘Well? Will you have me?’
She smiled then, moving forward, pressing herself against him. His breath caught in the most satisfactory way. ‘Will you be kind to me Kirkwood? Will you handle me delicately, shelter my tender emotions, spare my womanly sensibilities?’
‘I very much doubt it,’ he muttered, voice roughening. She had managed to lodge herself against him most agreeably and was pleased with the effect she seemed to be having upon him. ‘I’m more likely to rip your clothes off and bury myself in you.’
The admission was both shocking and delicious and heat surged through her. ‘They say you are a rogue, Sir, with no gentlemanly instincts at all.’
‘Oh I have instincts,’ he assured her. ‘In fact, I am suffering from a surfeit of them right at this moment.’
‘Oh dear,’ she murmured, raising her face to his. ‘Should I be alarmed?’
‘Yes, Miss Hathaway,’ he growled, enfolding her in his arms. ‘You should be terrified!’
His mouth descended, crushing her own beneath it and Audrey welcomed the sweet, savage pressure. She wound her arms around his neck and returned the kiss, mouth opening eagerly beneath his urgency, tongues twining, bodies aflame for each other. She felt no hesitation at this rough treatment, only a desire to be closer to him, to meet his fervor with her own. Long fingers splayed across her back, hot and hard through the fabric of her gown, holding her even closer while his erection pushed against her own softness, an antidote to the desperate longing that was swelling within her.
This was no undemanding, gentle love, she thought hazily. This was a storm that would likely pick her up and spin her around but oh, she wanted to be swept away by Kirkwood, to have him teach her everything he knew about his own version of rapture, to take her to a place where she knew, instinctively, they would be perfectly matched. This was the love she had been craving, had she but known it and this was the man she had been craving it with. Audrey melted and melded beneath the onslaught, returning his sweet hunger in full until her senses surrendered to the onslaught and the world span away…
… so much so that neither of them heard the sound of Millie hammering on the door until the girl herself was tugging at Audrey’s sleeve, sounding thoroughly exasperated.
‘Audrey! For heaven’s sake, will you please pay attention to me. Mama is coming, I tell you!’
The words penetrated at last and Kirkwood’s grip slackened, his lips leaving her own. She stared up at him, eyes heavy with desire. ‘Oh my goodness…’
‘Never mind that,’ her youngest sister said sharply. ‘Mr. Kirkwood, please step away from my sister before Mama comes in or she will know you have been kissing her. And believe me when I say that you do not want to be explaining that particular circumstance.’
Kirkwood blinked, but the words had a very bracing effect and he collected himself hastily. He took a quick step backwards, although his hands fell away with obvious reluctance, as if they wished to remain exactly where there were. ‘Miss Hathaway,’ he began.
‘Whatever you do,’ Audrey said in a low voice. ‘Do not apologize.’
He closed his mouth abruptly and smiled, a slow, sensuous smile that spread to his wicked dark eyes and did little to soothe the clamoring longing within. Audrey looked at her sister hurriedly and smoothed her hair. ‘Do I look respectable?’
‘After what I just witnessed, I doubt I shall ever find you respectable again,’ her loving sister observed cheerfully.
‘Do not say a word!’
‘As if I would want to tell Mama about that.’
There came the sound of Isabella’s and Mama’s voices in the hallway and the more piercing accents of Lady Allingham, all of them heading towards the breakfast room. They paused when they saw the three figures standing in the parlor.
‘Audrey,’ Mama said in some surprise. ‘Whatever are you doing in here?’
‘Well,’ Audrey began, wondering what to say. Millie was with them, of course but there really wasn’t any reason for the three of them to be in the parlor.
‘Lady Hathaway,’ Kirkwood said, stepping forward. ‘May I have a word with you?’
Mama looked surprised. ‘Why certainly, Mr. Kirkwood.’ She stepped into the parlor, Isabella and Lady Allingham following on. It would have been far better if Lady Allingham hadn’t followed, Audrey reflected, but there was no helping it now. Isabella gave her a quizzical glance and tilted her head in question. Audrey grimaced. She was uncertain what Kirkwood intended but wouldn’t put anything past him. Harry trailed into the room a few moments later and, just to complete the party, Beth and Roddy joined them almost immediately, having obviously been listening for the sounds of some disturbance.
She and Kirkwood shared a rueful glance. ‘We might as well tell them all at once,’ he suggested quietly. ‘Although if you would prefer to wait…?’
‘No,’ Audrey shook her head. ‘Go ahead.’
No matter how one looked at this, it was an embarrassing situation, being found standing in a parlor with a scandalous gentleman with only one’s young sister to make the situation respectable. But Audrey found that she did not have it in her to be shamed or shocked by the circumstances she suddenly found herself in. The most remarkable happiness had her in its grip and the weeks of painful introspection and uncertainty disappeared as if they had never happened.
She was going to marry Kirkwood. It would probably outrage Society and they were likely to be shunned by the ton in droves. Audrey did not care in the least.
Stepping forward, Kirkwood reached out and took her hand. ‘Lady Hathaway, would you care to sit down?’
Mama looked at Audrey’s hand, firmly held in Kirkwood’s. She headed for the nearest chair and sat down heavily. ‘Audrey?’
‘It’s perfectly all right, Mama,’ Audrey assured her. ‘In fact, it’s better than all right.’
‘Lady Hathaway,’ Kirkwood continued on with admirable aplomb, given the circumstances and the audience. ‘I would like to ask for your daughter’s hand in marriage.’
‘Oh my!’ Mama breathed.
‘What?’ Lady Allingham snapped. ‘What did you say?’
‘I find it hard to believe that you could have misunderstood but to recap, I have asked for Miss Hathaway’s hand in marriage,’ Kirkwood said, turning his head to regard his stepmother.
‘Good God, you must be mad!’ Lady Allingham said incredulously. ‘Offering for someone of Miss Hathaway’s status. As if she would ever dream of marrying somebody like you.’
‘Oh for God’s sake, Mother,’ Allingham said impatiently from the doorway. ‘Do stop this nonsense about his birth. Darius is practically royalty on his mother’s side. He is hardly descended from peasant stock.’
His mother switched her arctic stare to her son. ‘He is a bastard, Roderick. In case you have forgotten.’
‘You have never let me forget it for so much as a moment in the past twenty-three years.’
‘Thank you for your support, brother,’ Kirkwood said, before her ladyship could retaliate. ‘Believe me when I say, nobody knows better than I that I am punching above my weight but I love Miss Hathaway and intend to make her an unexceptional husband.’
Audrey smiled at this. She could not help it. The idea that Kirkwood could be anything but extraordinary was impossible to believe. ‘Mama?’ she said, turning to her parent. ‘You have said very little. I know this is a shock but please, say that you approve.’
Lady Hathaway hesitated, studying Audrey with troubled eyes. ‘I am not sure what to say,’ she admitted. ‘It is not that I have any objection to Mr. Kirkwood himself, my dear, but I am not at all sure this is suitable.’
‘I do not care what people will think,’ Audrey assured her. ‘Indeed, the only people’s good wishes I need are that of my family. I admit, I had not thought of Mr. Kirkwood as my ideal man.’ She glanced at Kirkwood and caught the gleam in his eye then blushed, recalling how quickly ideals, like expectations, could change. ‘But I believe he is the man for me.’ The man she had been wishing for since she had truly understood the way love could be between a man and a woman. She could go and find herself any number of suitable gentlemen but she was prepared to wager none of them would make her feel anything like the rush of extraordinary passion that blossomed between them with just a look. There was a great deal more to a relationship than passion; that much was certain. Passion could burn itself out with the passing years. But what could be depended on was a sense of homecoming that could be felt when a person found the one individual they could truly be themselves with.
She had no doubt at all that individual was Darius Kirkwood.
‘But you hardly know him, my dear,’ Mama persisted. ‘In fact, I cannot understand how you could have formed a tendre for Mr. Kirkwood based on the merest acquaintance.’
‘It happens all the time,’ Millie, who had been watching the proceedings with interest, offered helpfully. ‘In The Castles of Athlin and Dunbayne, two men fall in love with Mary, despite the fact that she faints all the time and they don’t know her at all. Well, not really. And Alleyn is a peasant, too. A noble and virtuous one.’
This contribution made them all pause for a moment. Beth Fielding’s lips twitched. ‘Well there you are, then.’
Lady Allingham stared at Millie as if she were mad. ‘Really, young lady, what are you talking about?’
‘Mrs. Radcliffe,’ Mama said, sounding distracted. ‘Really Millie, I do wish you would stop reading those books as if they were a reference guide. I do not think -’
‘You did say anyone, Mama,’ Isabella interrupted her mother suddenly.
Eliza Hathaway glanced at her eldest daughter, bemused. ‘Excuse me?’
‘When we were discussing marriage some months ago. You did say that Audrey could please herself as to whom she married because Marcus and I had done so well for ourselves,’ Isabella said wryly. ‘And why should she not? Only think about it. We none of us are perfect in our choices. Harry is marvelously wealthy thanks to relatives in trade who very kindly left him a fortune.’ Harry Carstairs inclined his head with a grin. ‘And we all know about Mrs. Howeth.’
‘Mrs. Howeth?’ Beth repeated, clearly trying to keep up.
‘My brother’s grandmother-in-law,’ Isabella explained. ‘A delightful woman in every way but she would not be welcome in Society. Her Papa owned some mines in Yorkshire. If we are going to look closely at the antecedents of everybody, then I think it safe to say that none of our choices of a partner would have been considered sensible by the ton.’
‘Your children married people in trade?’ Lady Allingham said, obviously shocked by this information.
‘My children married people they fell in love with,’ Lady Hathaway returned, tone suddenly brisk. It appeared that, having observed the situation, she had gathered her second wind. ‘Which has been a source of considerable happiness to me, I might add. Thank-you Isabella,’ she added, with a nod. ‘You reminded me of something I should not have allowed myself to forget. And with this in mind…’ Rising to her feet, she held her hands out to Audrey. ‘Do you love Mr. Kirkwood, my dear?’
Audrey did not hesitate. Taking her mother’s hands, she nodded. ‘I did not think… That is to say, it took me by surprise but yes, I do love him.’
Mama nodded and turned to Kirkwood. ‘And you, Sir? I am inclined to think you are not accustomed to family life. Let me assure you, if you marry Audrey, you take on her family en masse for we have a tendency to live in each other’s pockets.’
‘From what I have seen of the Hathaways, I look forward to sharing that particular pocket,’ he assured her with a smile.
She considered him for a long moment, then inclined her head, apparently reassured by whatever she had found on his face. ‘Then yes, you both have my heartfelt blessing. I will not question the suddenness of this announcement any further. If life has taught me anything, it is that love is as inexplicable as it is marvelous. I am delighted for you both.’
Lady Allingham gaped at her. ‘You are consenting to this?’
‘Of course. I think I can safely say that all of my children know their own minds. And have made excellent choices,’ she gave Isabella a warm smile.
‘But he’s a -’
‘Mother!’ Allingham raised his voice and that one word carried all the weight of an earl who had suddenly discovered himself head of his family. ‘I will thank you not to say that word again.’
Judith Allingham rose to her feet. ‘I cannot believe you can all be so blasé about this!’
‘Well I, for one, will be thrilled to welcome Miss Hathaway into our family,’ Beth said firmly. She smiled at Audrey. ‘Roddy and I are to be married in April but perhaps you will not care to wait for so long. Perhaps we shall be attending your wedding before you attend ours.’
‘I think I can safely say that April is far too long to wait,’ Kirkwood said, but quietly. Audrey glanced at him and caught a glimpse of naked hunger, quickly hidden. No, she reflected as her own body surged in response. I do not wish to wait until April either…
‘This is so much better than Mrs. Radcliffe,’ Millie assured them. ‘Go on Mr. Kirkwood. As you’re getting married you might as well kiss her again.’
There came a short, appalled silence and then three female voices raised as one, a single word on their lips.
‘Millie!’
