Текст книги "Mine"

Автор книги: Dimon HelenKay

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Текущая страница: 16 (всего у книги 18 страниц)

“I need—”

His fingers slipped behind the zipper and skimmed down the outside of her underwear. “Me.”

Now, it had to be now. She couldn’t sit on the information. That would make everything worse. She had to drag it out or forget it. There wasn’t a middle ground, and her good sense kept blinking out as need took over.

“Okay, look.” She forced her hands to let go of his and turned around. Still in the cocoon of his arms, she looked up and stared into those dark eyes. “I need my brain functioning, and when you touch me that can’t happen.”

His mouth flattened into a thin line and tension pulled at his eyes. “If this is about leaving, don’t say it.”

She actually had to shake her head. She’d been racing down one road and he was . . . where the hell was he? “What?”

“Eli comes in here and says you’re about to get the green light on your future, and now you want to have a big talk.” With his hands on her hips, Gabe pulled her in closer. “I don’t want to hear about you moving on.”

They’d gone off track. Leaving was the dead last thing on her mind. Her drive to stay with him kept pulling at her to do the right thing and fess up. To give him an answer he might not want but one he needed so he could prepare. “I didn’t say that.”

His fingers tightened on her. “But it’s coming, right?”

“You’ve been nice about—”

“Jesus, Natalie. I am not nice.”

She didn’t know how to respond to a guy who got ticked off at being told he was a good guy. “Okay.”

“The talk I gave you about staying here for your safety is bullshit.” He swore under his breath. Shook his head. Looked as if he had a battle going on inside him and was trying to fight through it. “Well, not completely, but that’s not really where my head was when I made the offer.”

She touched him then. Ran her hand along his jaw because he seemed like he needed comfort. “I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

“I want you to stay for me, Nat. I want you safe, sure, but this is way more selfish than that. I want you to be here with me.”

Her mind went blank. Every argument and thought shuddered to a halt in her head. “Gabe.”

“Yeah, it’s too fast and maybe a little stupid. I don’t give a damn.” He wrapped his arms around her. For a second he leaned his forehead against hers but then he lifted it again and stared down at her with an expression that looked suspiciously like worry. “You being here, sleeping beside you. God, Natalie, it means everything to me.”

“You want—”

He exhaled, long and loud and full of pent-up something. “I want you to stay so that we can figure out what’s happening between us. I want that future you’re considering to include me.”

The words sputtered inside of her. Here she was thinking about covert actions in his personal life, and he was offering her a chance that amounted to more than a few rounds of good sex. She shouldn’t want the opportunity or crave it so much, but she did. From the start her feelings for him had only intensified.

Still, she had to be smart. That protective wall she erected so long ago couldn’t just crash down with a gentle push. It needed to be bulldozed, and it scared her that he might have that kind of strength and staying power. “This started out as sex.”

“Sex and protection.”

Even that much had been a violation of her personal rule and, honestly, of his. “Nothing more.”

He frowned. Looked as if he were preparing for a body blow. “Can you truly say that’s all it is now?”

She thought about how he smelled and how he smiled. How good it felt to lie in bed and run her hands over him. Not just for sex. The getting to know him part.

She should lie and stand firm. Not let the toughness slip . . . but looking into those eyes, so full of genuine feeling, and knowing the leaning of her own heart she couldn’t cut the ties and walk away. “No, it’s a lot more.”

His hands cupped her cheeks now, as if he willed her to believe every word. “Then understand that while I do want you safe and I’ve never forgotten my job is to protect you, the man—not the protector or the president of a security company—the actual man, is hoping you want to stay for him.”

If she hadn’t been falling for him before that moment, that comment would have sent her flying over the edge. His honesty sealed her fate.

She treated him to a quick kiss and pulled back before he could take it deeper. “For a guy who doesn’t say many words, when you do you sure pick the right ones.”

His frown disappeared. “Is that a yes?”

She wrapped her arms around his neck and let the unexpected sensation of lightness wash through her. “Yes.”

“We’re definitely getting naked now.” His hands moved to her back and started wandering.

The friction of her body rubbing against his had her thinking about his bed and how much she loved it when he balanced his elbows on either side of her and hovered above her. “No question.”

“What’s that?” He nodded toward the envelope.

Her gaze slipped to it and guilt nagged at her. She’d open it later. She’d peek inside and find the answer because that’s who she was. She didn’t let clues get by her. And armed with the information she might be able to ease his pain or push him toward a test she knew would make his world better. But all that came later. “Something I thought I needed.”

His hands slid down her back making a beeline for her ass. “And now?”

She jumped up and wrapped her legs around his upper thighs. “I need you.”

TWENTY-SIX

Rick had the power to turn a day to shit.

Gabe got the call that his big brother hit the road from D.C. and was on the way. Andy jumped in the car to act as a potential referee, if needed. At least that’s what his text said. A few minutes ago the house alarm chirped and Gabe buzzed the far gate to let them in. Now he had to wait it out. See what was so urgent Rick insisted on a face-to-face meeting here, where Gabe never conducted business with Rick.

As if Gabe didn’t know.

He’d spent last night all over Natalie, barely letting her rest so he could forget the nightmare closing in. He’d settled one part of his life. Actually found a woman he cared about to the point where he wanted to change his life to make room for her. He’d been in her, over her, under her. There wasn’t an inch of her body he didn’t know better than his own.

She’d traced every scar on his chest and back and asked for the story behind each injury. With how he felt about her, the level of trust he’d developed so damn fast, he didn’t hold back. He gave the details he could without violating confidences. They’d only been out of bed and dressed for a half hour, which matched up perfectly with the time of Andy’s warning text.

He heard her footsteps on the stairs and glanced up. She wore jeans and a long-sleeve V-neck tee. This morning she had her hair up and off her face. So beautiful without makeup. Real to the bone.

But something else lingered there. Gone was the sure woman who knew what she wanted last night. Her steps seemed tentative, as if she expected something terrible brewed.

He hated pulling her into the middle of his family battle but it seemed shitty to cut her out or pretend he wouldn’t spill later anyway. That’s what he did with her. For the first time, he opened up. He shared intimate details and his greatest fear. He knew she wanted to help when she suggested he might want to think about the DNA test, but he’d shut that line of thinking down because he couldn’t find his way through the haze of denial that had fallen around him.

Fucking Rick.

When he saw her hesitate on the last step, not coming into the great room with him, he wondered if her apprehension covered more than Rick. After all, they’d turned a huge corner last night. He went from offering her a sanctuary to offering her more.

He wasn’t being nice when he said she should stay. Shit, what had that been about? No, he was being selfish. For once, reaching out and asking for something for himself—her. Them together, working this out and looking toward a future.

But with her past and her anti-commitment walls stacked even thicker than his, he understood how he could have shaken her up. In the light of day he might not seem as great a catch. “You okay?”

She chewed on her bottom lip. “Should I stay upstairs while you talk with Rick?”

So, that was it. While she might want to avoid the discomfort, truth was he needed her in the room. It might take her and Andy to keep Rick alive.

“No. I want you here.” Gabe held out a hand to her and felt a wave of relief surge through him when she grabbed on.

She stepped to his side and sighed when he wrapped an arm around her. “Is this about Brandon?” she asked.

“I don’t know.” But he had a sneaky suspicion Rick’s patience had worn out.

“This might be battleground day.” If the anxiety pounding his insides was any indication, yes.

“We should talk about—”

The sound of Andy typing in the code rang out in steady chirps. Then the door opened, and his brothers walked in with a burst of cool air. Gabe thought that might be an omen.

“Ms. Udall.” Rick nodded his hello.

“You can call me Natalie.”

“Okay then.” Andy rocked back on his heels before walking around Rick and taking a seat on the armrest of the couch. “Now that we have the pleasant part out of the way.”

“Your attorney has made his displeasure known. My clients are pulling back.” Rick held out a thick white envelope to Natalie.

She just stared at it. “Shouldn’t my attorney be the one handing me any necessary documents?”

“In here is a copy of my termination letter and the stated reason why the matter was settled.” She took it and Rick dropped his arm. “Bast should be calling soon, or however you communicate, but I thought you’d like to see the copies of the affidavits and other documents Bast sent to the people who hired me. I can’t believe your old bosses will sign them, but you, and by extension Bast, do have the leverage.”

Gabe wasn’t convinced. He’d played games with these types before. They said one thing and did another, just like they had with Natalie’s original agreement. They dug for loopholes and called things by new names. Did anything to get out from under the restrictions they’d already agreed to, and when that didn’t work they violated the terms with impunity.

For Natalie’s sake, Gabe needed to know if this just ushered in a new round. “Are your people ending this in fact or pretending to?”

Rick spared him a brief glance. “Bast doesn’t exactly play fair.”

“You can’t when someone is holding a gun to your head,” Andy said.

Natalie tapped the envelope against her open palm. “So, this means the bounty on my head has been lifted.”

“There never was one.” Rick looked at them all. Met their eyes. “My job was to check on you.”

“Come on.” No way did Gabe buy that. From the way Andy shook his head, it didn’t look like he did either.

“Follow and watch. That was the entirety of my orders.”

Except that he had the green light to extricate Natalie or take her down if he saw anything to suggest she was breaking the agreement. That’s how these things worked, no matter what Rick tried to sell. The way he lied about it without blinking worried Gabe. They all possessed the skill but didn’t turn it loose on family. Rick didn’t operate with that caveat. He treated everyone with the same level of detachment.

Gabe knew he should let it drop. They’d talk with Bast and sort it all out. Until then, the best way to handle Rick was quick, in and out. But the tension whipping around inside him called for a bigger response. He’d let so much slide. Heard every new piece of information from Rick and tamped as much of the outward hostility down inside as possible. All for Brandon’s sake.

But he wasn’t here now, so Gabe let the leash on his anger slip. “You get a good show following us?”

Natalie froze, and Andy made a strangled sound.

“It was either me or someone who would pull the trigger without warning if the mission directive changed.” Rick kept on justifying and explaining. Telling his side in a packaged way that sounded like truth but came off as one more piece of blowhard bullshit.

“You’re saying you would have disobeyed the direction from your client?” Andy shook his head. “No way.”

Rick continued to stand there with his arms stiff at his sides and his posture perfect. More robotic than human. “I would have warned Gabe.”

No fucking way. Gabe knew from experience the absolute last thing Rick would do was give a warning before screwing him over.

“Convenient.” Gabe didn’t even try to mumble. He nearly shouted the word.

“I’m talking about one thing.” Rick’s voice turned deadly cold. “You’re trying to make this about another.”

Tension choked the room. They kept glancing at one another, as if waiting for the explosion to come. Gabe decided to diffuse. It amounted to more denial, but he didn’t give a shit. “Fine, Natalie is probably safe. We’ll wait for word from Bast, who is my client, before she goes anywhere.”

“Is she leaving?” Rick asked.

The words sliced through Gabe even when someone else said them. He’d just stopped worrying every second about her cutting out on him. Now Rick raised the issue again.

“She?” The fury rumbled in Natalie’s voice.

Gabe didn’t like Rick’s dismissive tone either, but now wasn’t the time for this battle. “Not your concern, but if that’s all then—”

“You know it’s not.”

Andy got up and put a hand on Rick’s arm. “Let Gabe finish this job.”

Not moving, not ever breaking eye contact with Gabe, Rick leveled his final shot. “I’m going to the campus tomorrow and taking Brandon to dinner.”

The words knocked the wind right out of Gabe. Had a mix of fear and fury vibrating through him. He wanted to double over, come out punching—something. But he refused to give Rick the satisfaction of knowing this threat landed.

This wasn’t about his ego. This was about Brandon and putting him in a position sure to rip him apart. “You promised you wouldn’t go directly to him.”

Rick shook his head. “You are waiting too long to make a decision about the DNA test or even broach the possibility of a paternity issue with Brandon.”

“The test results won’t change if Brandon gets older.” Gabe hated to even reference them. Give them any credence, but that fact should resonate on some level. Or it would if Rick’s plans were really about Brandon and not about Rick’s ego.

Natalie started to say something but Rick talked right over her. “Under that scenario I lose more time with him.”

Rage swamped Gabe. Started at his feet and swept over him until the heat thundered in his veins. “And you don’t give a shit what I lose.”

“Look at this from my side.”

Every comment ignited more fury until Gabe could barely see. The room shrank until it was just the two of them locked in this fight. He took a warning step. Got right up in Rick’s face, ready to unload with more than words if necessary. “You mean the side where you slept with my girlfriend, lied about it, watched me struggle to raise Brandon—”

“I helped.” Rick’s yell bounced off the soaring ceilings.

A silence followed the shout. A tense quiet fell over the room. The walls seemed to be closing in and dark clouds gathered despite the sunny day.

Gabe didn’t care if they broke every stick of furniture. This was too important and the pounding inside of him screamed for him to take a shot, just one. To take out all his frustration and fear on the brother who didn’t care what happened to any of them.

“And now want to rush in, clear your conscience and claim my son as yours.” Gabe shook as he spit out the words. His jaw tightened until cracking and he had to ball his hands into fists to keep from reaching out and ending this with Rick once and for all.

Instead of taking the bait and launching the first punch, Rick stepped back. He shook his head as he stared at the floor. “You don’t know how long I debated telling you all of this.”

Gabe didn’t buy it for one second. “Stop acting like the victim.”

“Maybe . . .” Rick glanced at Natalie. “We should—”

“What?” Gabe was too far gone to listen to reasoning or anything else. Fire burned inside of him. He’d been putting it out and stomping on it from the day he learned about the affair. Now it raged.

“Ms. . . .” Rick threw out an arm in Natalie’s direction. “She doesn’t need to hear all of our private information.”

“She knows about Brandon and your claims. She is with me.” Gabe took another step, but this one put him in front of her. “Do you understand that?”

“You’re sleeping together.” Rick hesitated between each word, as if he analyzed them as he said them.

“More than that.” Andy stood up, too. Now the four of them hovered around in a tight group, with Natalie just outside of Rick’s reach, but not by far.

Rick looked confused. “I didn’t know it was serious.”

“Why, did you want to make a pass at her, too?” Andy groaned, but Gabe did not regret the smartass comment. Rick deserved the shot. Deserved a hell of a lot more.

“Okay, stop.” Natalie shoved them all out of the way and moved to the center of the circle.

Rick shook his head. “This isn’t your business.”

Not one to back down, Natalie put a hand out, not touching him but close. Her other one rested on Gabe’s chest. “Your mistakes are impacting everyone’s business.”

Rick glanced at her hand. Looked ready to swat it away but didn’t. “I am not arguing with you about my life.”

“What the fuck.” Andy kept swearing under his breath for another few seconds before continuing on. “This isn’t just about you, Rick.”

“Well, it’s sure as hell not about her.”

Something exploded in Gabe’s brain. She was off-limits and Rick . . . “That’s it.”

“No.” Natalie shoved against him as he closed in. She threw in a glare before looking back and forth between all the men. “Honest to God, I will pull my gun.” She focused in on Rick. “And you, dumbass, should not test me.”

Andy pushed them all back, giving her some breathing room. He also kept a hand on each brother. “Let’s listen to the smart lady.”

Gabe wrestled with his control. He’d lost it. Really lost it. Actually wanted to hurt Rick. Inflict some damage so he’d know what it felt like to live in this tumble of confusion and frustration and panic. That realization had him inhaling and trying to get his heartbeat to settle back to normal levels.

“First, everyone stop talking about Brandon’s mother like she’s a cookie the two of you passed back and forth.” Natalie looked around at all of them but stopped on Rick. “Gabe loved Linda, and you were so far out of line that you should be grateful he lets you in his life and anywhere near Brandon after what you did.”

Andy nodded. “Amen.”

She turned on Gabe. “And you . . . Linda was young and made a mistake and it’s over. Not to minimize or diminish, because you are right to be furious and not trust Rick, but you said you don’t love her. Let that part fall into history and focus on what—who—does matter.”

“This is about Brandon,” Andy added.

“Who could be my son.”

Andy grabbed Rick’s arm and twisted his shirt in his hand. “You’ve got to stop with this shit.”

“Gabe is sitting there, patting himself on the back for raising the kid but that might not have been his right.” Rick practically screamed the insult.

He couldn’t do it. Gabe couldn’t find a place or enough time to dig out of the hole. So, he would fight his way out. “I am going to fucking kill you.”

“He’s mine,” Rick said, not leaving any doubt how he thought a DNA test would come out.

She rolled her eyes at him. “Brandon is not furniture. He is not a possession.”

Gabe listened to the words and remembered Natalie’s comment about Linda not being a cookie. It resonated. Even humbled him a little, because he had turned Linda into the villain in his mind. Forgot her age and everything going on in her life at that time with her difficult parents and painted her as evil. Something clicked. Not enough for Gabe to turn off the rage, but it decreased to a level where he could think again.

He was about to call for cooldown when Rick pointed at Natalie. “Stay out of this.”

She shook her head. “He’s not your son.”

“Right, I get Gabe’s argument about biology.” Rick waved a hand in the air. “Save it.”

She visibly swallowed. “No, I mean he’s really not your son.”

Silence crashed through the room for a second time. They all stared at her. Rick wore a look of confusion, but Gabe didn’t care about him. He focused on her. She didn’t throw out comments just to say them. She backed up claims. She did her homework.

Gabe’s mind went blank as he searched for the right words. The hollowness inside him made it tough to hear or think about anything. He touched her arm and brought her around to face him. “What are you talking about?”

“I have the test results.” Some of the strength had left her voice. She stood in the middle of the room, more or less between them all, and kept glancing from one to the other.

“What the fuck?” Andy stepped back. Way back until he leaned against the fireplace.

“I had them done so Gabe would know.”

Gabe could barely hear her. The words faded. His emotions battled. Relief at the idea of her being right. Absolute crushing pain at the thought of her working behind his back. Doing exactly what he told her he didn’t want.

“I’m supposed to trust you?” But part of Rick clearly did. The doubt about the paternity hovered right there in his voice.

“Gabe didn’t know.” She walked over to the bookshelf next to the fireplace and removed an envelope from the top of a line of books and held it out to Rick. “And you can look for yourself. Reputable lab. Gabe is the birth father.”

She’d carried that around yesterday. Gabe fought to remember through the daze that threatened to swallow him.

Rick turned the envelope over in his hands but didn’t open it. “This can’t be.”

“Natalie?” Gabe heard the rough edge to his voice and ignored it.

Sadness filled her eyes as she held a hand out to him. “I know you’re upset.”

“No.” He jerked away from her touch, because that word didn’t even come close to covering this betrayal. He had to fight his knees to stay steady and choke back the bile rushing up the back of his throat. “What the fuck did you do?”

“Ran the test.”

He didn’t know how that was possible. He searched his mind for any reasonable excuse or a way to understand why she lied and worked behind his back. How she . . . The lightbulb clicked on. Those visits from Eli. Here he thought he welcomed the guy into his house to help her legal case when she was just playing games with his personal life.

A strange darkness fell over him. “Why would you do this?”

Before she could answer Rick’s flat voice floated through the room. “I was so sure.”

Gabe leaned over and ripped the envelope out of Rick’s hand. Then he pointed toward the door. “You, get out of my house.”

“Gabe, maybe we should talk this through,” Andy said in an uncharacteristically hesitant voice.

No, this anger Gabe could handle. The kind aimed at Rick. His offenses stood out there for everyone to see. Natalie’s . . . Gabe couldn’t wrap his head around her choices. He brought her into his life and told her how he felt. How lost he was about the idea of losing Brandon.

Damn it, he fell for her. Hard and fast and with enough intensity to knock him stupid. Maybe that explained it. The great sex and growing feelings for her blocked out what he should have seen happening right there in his house. He lowered his emotional wall and she jumped over. Jumped all over him.

“Take him outside.” He gestured for Andy to usher Rick out of his sight then turned on Natalie. “Now tell me why I shouldn’t kick you out on your lying ass.”