Текст книги "Addicted for Now"
Автор книги: Becca Ritchie
Соавторы: Krista Ritchie
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Текущая страница: 25 (всего у книги 31 страниц)
“Yeah, how does it feel?” It doesn’t happen often.
She looks panic-stricken and I realize that the fear of losing me…of losing us is what really motivates her. She motions to the case. “Burn it. Do what you need to do.” She shoves it against my chest and tries to push me out the door. I force myself not to smile because the “tough love” is actually working. I’d rather not ruin it with a momentary grin.
“No masturbating,” I tell her again.
She nods wildly. “I know. None. Not at all. Scouts honor.” She holds up three fingers. I don’t believe her completely, but at least she’s come around from denying it.
Now I just have to bring her to the exam on time.
{ 39 }
LILY CALLOWAY
I don’t have time to think about my fight with Lo, being caught by all three guys, or the fact that paparazzi sprung up like woken zombies as soon as I arrived on campus. Someone leaked my class schedule to the press, and I sprinted into the building to avoid them.
I’m going to fail the exam anyway, but Lo and Connor would never let me skip. I leave the guys in the lobby to wait, and I jog up the staircase to the second floor. My plan is to slip into the back of the auditorium before anyone can see me. I’ll take the test, turn it in, and leave. How hard can that be?
I swing the door open and stop cold at the top of the auditorium-style room. All three-hundred students are already nestled in their seats while TAs walk up the aisles to pass out the exams.
I’m late.
And there’s no open seat anywhere in sight. Oh wait…
I spot one in the middle aisle of the middle row. There’s not much room to squeeze past people, and I imagine disturbing everyone as I hop over thirty bodies to reach my seat. I don’t want to be that person. Everyone always gives the late-arrival dirty looks, and since I’ve been on the news for the past couple of weeks, I can’t imagine the looks being the normal kind of dirty. They’d be dirty with an extra pinch of malice.
My throat goes dry and my palms turn clammy. I’m about to sprint out and make up some lame excuse to Lo, but the professor notices my lingering presence.
“Miss Calloway,” he calls.
I freeze, and like a tsunami, all three-hundred bodies rotate to set their inquisitive gazes on me. If this is what being an actress feels like, I want no part of it.
“Come see me down here, please.” The professor motions for me.
I suck in a shallow breath and descend the carpeted stairs, trying to avoid all the eyes. Not even halfway there, some guy coughs into his hand. On the second cough, I hear “whore.”
That’s original.
Two more steps and someone else calls me a skank, louder this time. I glance towards the noise and I see a girl elbowing the guy in the ribs.
Five more steps and the voices start to rise as people talk to their friends.
“All right, settle down,” the professor tells them.
“Go back to Penn!” a guy yells. Voices escalate and cheer in agreement.
“Better yet, go to Yale! I hear they like filth!” I don’t know what that person has against Yale, but I try to keep my cool. I’m almost to the bottom of the auditorium, and I silently curse myself for walking in on the second floor.
“Shut up!” A girl’s voice pitches over the talking. Huh…someone’s on my side? “We’re trying to take a test here!” Maybe not.
“Quiet!” the professor shouts, angrily now. “Everyone. The tests are out, and that means the next person who speaks gets a zero.” The room hushes instantly, and I finally reach my destination.
The professor is middle-aged and always wears a nice button-down with slacks. He takes out a manila envelope from his briefcase and hands it to me. My name is scribbled across the front.
“I’ve spoken to your other professors,” he says in a low voice so only I can hear, “we’ve agreed that your presence for finals week will only disturb the other students. Your exam today and your finals from all your classes are in that folder. You can turn it into my mailbox by the last day of finals.”
“So they’re like take-home tests?” I ask, a little confused.
“Essentially, yes. There’s no reason for you to be on campus for one last week. You’ll distract everyone. You’ve already wasted…” He looks at the clock. “Five minutes of their time. For some that could cost them a letter grade.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right. Just return the exams on time, and if you could, exit out this door.” He motions to the one behind him, the one where I won’t need to walk up all those stairs.
I say a quick thanks and then disappear quickly out the double doors. I peek into the envelope, all the tests nestled inside. It’s generous. They could have easily just failed me. But it also reminds me how my life is changing. I can’t even sit in a classroom anymore. What is next year going to be like? Will the professor give me all the tests to take home? Or maybe they’re hoping I’ll be expelled from Princeton before that happens.
But with my father’s lawyers defending my stay here, I know I’ll be back next year.
Walking down the hall, I find Lo, Connor, and Ryke sitting in the lobby where I last left them, waiting for me. They talk quietly amongst each other. I raise my hand to wave and call to them, but a body steps in front of me, blocking my path.
“Hey, aren’t you the infamous Lily Calloway?”
He speaks loud enough that I see Lo’s head perk up. His eyes hit mine and they fill with concern.
“Are you deaf?” the guy laughs.
I meet his pretty green eyes and scan his blond hair, a twenty-something guy, tall with muscular arms. He sports a black and orange Princeton tee.
“I’m Lily,” I confirm. My eyes flicker past his body again. Lo is on his feet, but he hesitates towards reaching my side.
Is he still angry at me?
Oh jeez, we’re still in a fight, aren’t we?
My heart beats crazily, and I focus my attention back on the blond. “I’m also leaving.” I sidestep and he follows suit, trapping me to this spot in the hall.
I hear Lo’s shoes on the tile floor, and I try to relax.
“Why would you want to do that?” Blond Guy asks. “I heard that you love going down, and I’ve got something here for you.” He grabs my hand, and fear bobs my throat. Oh my God. I never thought this could happen in a hallway (slightly empty, albeit) during the middle of the day. Maybe he thinks I’m as wanting and easy as they say I am on the news. Maybe he believes I won’t care or fight him. That has to be it.
But I’m not that girl. Sure, I may have played into his advances a year ago, but now they literally curdle my stomach. I recoil and try to untangle from his strong hold, but he grips my hand and places it right on his pants.
Whatever I feel—it doesn’t last long because Lo grabs his shoulders from behind and throws his back into the wall.
I flinch, not accustomed to physical aggression from Lo, not even when he pinned Mason against my car. And he eases off the guy within a second, his eyes pulsing with something hot and black.
“This is why America invented the sexual offender registry, you sick fuck,” Lo spits.
“I didn’t touch her,” Blond sneers, the veins in his neck bulging. “Your slutty girlfriend was all over me.”
“I was not,” I snap, about to charge him myself. I don’t have nails, but I’m not below slapping.
Ryke grabs me, and I squirm, trying to go help Lo. “Lily, stop,” Ryke says, holding me tighter.
“You want your dick to be touched so badly, fine,” Lo growls, and he does something that causes me to pause, going quiet and motionless in Ryke’s arms.
Lo slams the guy again, his back digging further into the wall, and he puts his hand over the guy’s pants. The icky feeling I had for touching Blond vanishes. I’m not the only who did it. Though, Lo volunteered his hand.
Blond thrashes, and Lo must grip hard because his face contorts into a pained wince. “Get the fuck off me.”
“What? You don’t like it anymore?”
“I can sue you for harassment.”
“Let’s play that fucking game,” Lo replies. “Let’s see whose lawyers are better. I’m a goddamn Hale. My family eats shitty fucks like you for brunch. Don’t you ever force yourself on a girl, ever again.” Lo loosens his grip, and then he steps back from him. Blond hesitates to retaliate, but his eyes ping from Lo, to Ryke, to Connor, and he mutters a curse and retreats down the hall.
Ryke looks ready to run after him and take a swing.
Lo’s chest rises, his hands clenching and unclenching. I see Jonathan in his words and actions, and I know the same comparison must infiltrate his head. Sober Lo still does mean things, and I’m not sure what the right way to protect me was—or what I could have done to help. But I do realize how much he hates even the notion of turning into Jonathan Hale. And for sacrificing a large chunk of his heart to come to my aid, I am very, very grateful. What he just did for me—it wasn’t easy.
His eyes find me. I step forward and put my arms around him, wanting to hold him and thank him all in one swoop.
Drunk Lo wouldn’t have been here.
I’d either have to give into this guy’s advances, scream for help and hope that a Ryke Meadows was around, or try to find a way to fight off a six-foot guy.
Lo kisses the top of my head, and says, “Are you sure you don’t want a bodyguard? I can’t always be around you, Lil.”
I’ve contemplated it. The idea of a guy shadowing me is a little unsettling, but after this, it’s definitely safer. “Only if you want me to.”
“We can pick out someone who’s really ugly,” he offers with a small smile. It’ll make him feel better, and that matters a lot to me.
I nod. “Okay.”
I separate from Lo and hold up the manila folder to Connor, who has been staring at it in curiosity for the past couple of minutes. “All my exams,” I explain. “The professors don’t want me on campus anymore.” For obvious reasons. And right now, I don’t want to be here all that much either.
Being a sex addict does not give guys the right to touch me. I didn’t think that would be an issue until now. Is this a problem that will persist for the rest of my life? Or something that will die when the media loses interest in me?
Only time has the answers.
{ 40 }
LILY CALLOWAY
“This would go a lot faster if you’d just let me bubble in the two other scantrons while you work on that one,” Sebastian tells me. He sits on the Queen Anne chair smoking his cigarette as he watches me hunched over piles of papers and scantrons. I’m basically copying the answers from Sebastian’s old exams to my finals, which feels more like cheating than simply memorizing.
But I’m fairly certain that actually letting him bubble in the answers would be cheating. “I’m not a cheater.” I cringe. “I’m not a complete cheater. Don’t tempt me to your dark side.”
He blows out a line of smoke. “Your angelic image was tarnished far before you ever accepted my help. You and I aren’t so different, Lily. We both enjoy an unhealthy amount of co—”
I throw a pillow at him and he catches it with his free hand, trying to protect his cigarette. Some things haven’t changed after I was outed as a sex addict. Sebastian is still Sebastian. And apparently he’s seen enough rich kid debauchery that my secret was hardly anything riveting. His words.
So I called him to bring over old exams for all my finals, and he hasn’t stared at me any differently than before the scandal. Which is kinda nice.
The front door bangs open.
I hurriedly shuffle the old exams into a pile. My head whips around, trying to find a good hiding place. I lift up the sofa cushion and stuff them under it.
When I meet Sebastian’s gaze, he looks like he could rip out my jugular for putting his old exams with the dust bunnies and rusted pennies. Oops.
Connor’s voice echoes from the kitchen. “We can keep brainstorming. We’ll come up with something, Lo.” They must be discussing the start-up company that Lo has to pitch to his father. He has a couple days left to choose a platform, and he enlisted Connor’s expertise. They spent all morning at a meeting to throw around ideas—and when I say “meeting,” I mean they sat in Starbucks.
They both saunter into the living room, Connor carrying a tray of coffees and a small pastry. “I thought you could use some test-taking boosts,” he tells me. Oh, this is why I love Connor Cobalt as a tutor. I beam, but that falls suddenly at the realization that I’m (A) Lying to him. (B) Cheating. (C) Team Sebastian. (D) Accepting the treats despite all of the above.
I say thanks and scoop the whipped cream from the coffee with my finger. Sin does taste delicious.
Lo stands off to the side, busily texting on his phone. Six days have passed since our bathroom fight over my self-love, and he has yet to forgive me completely. Our fights used to revolve around our addictions—sometimes we’d just drown in them for an extended week, ignoring each other. But this is a real, normal fight that hurts more than I ever thought it would.
“Lo, did you come up with any good ideas for the company?” I ask. I offered to help, but every time I suggested something, he told me to focus on my health. I grab the chocolate-filled croissant on the table and tear off small pieces to eat. I dunk a portion in my coffee.
Lo acknowledges me, and his eyes lighten when he sees me eating. “The top choice is a food truck.” He doesn’t look enthusiastic about that idea.
I take a slurp from my coffee. “You have more time,” I remind him. “It’s not over until the fat lady sings…” I narrow my eyes. No that’s not right. “Well, in this case the fat lady would be your father.”
He smiles, and he must catch the momentary lapse of happiness towards me because his lips downturn quickly. He closes off the conversation with the shift of his body.
We’re still fighting apparently.
“Where’s Rose?” Sebastian asks, lighting another cigarette.
Connor stares at it, letting irritation cross his face, his chest inflating with a deep inhale. “She’s taking a final, and you shouldn’t be smoking in here.”
“And yet…” Sebastian blows out a short puff. “I am.”
Lo’s phone rings, and he slips into the kitchen to answer his cell.
Connor steps towards Sebastian, and my evil tutor suddenly springs from his chair, both guys standing their ground with superiority. They each believe they’re better than the other. I’m not accustomed to intellectual stand-offs.
Sebastian appraises the cigarette in his fingers. “She hardly cares if I smoke, you know. If you did it, she’d drop you like she did her last boyfriend. She found a pack of cigarettes in his coat pocket. Next day, he was gone. Lasted one taxingly long week.”
“You planted the cigarettes on him, didn’t you?”
Sebastian takes a long drag and breathes the smoke right into Connor’s face. “Perceptive.”
Connor doesn’t even flinch. “Maybe you should be.”
Sebastian lets out a laugh. “You don’t think I am? I know that Rose has spent almost no time with you since Calloway Couture has suffered. I know that she cried on my shoulder two nights ago, not yours. I know that she called me, not you, to help pack up her office.”
She already started boxing her workplace?
“You feel threatened by me,” Connor states, stepping forward so only a small space separates his body from Sebastian’s. Connor has the height advantage—he usually does.
“By Connor Cobalt? A guy who is willing to sell out anyone if the benefit weighs on his side. No, I am not threatened by you. I just hate you.” Sebastian gives him a long once over. “Rose always did too. I don’t know what you said that changed her mind.”
“She never hated me,” Connor says casually.
“She bitched about you all the time in prep school. She’d return from Model UN, and I’d have to listen to her drone on about how Richard made a treaty against her country’s best interests. How Richard won the highest honor for countering terrorist actions.” Model UN sounds mildly intense and slightly scary.
“For such a smart guy, you really know nothing,” Connor says, his voice even-tempered. “She liked me, Sebastian. She bitched to you because she was attracted to me, a guy that riled her more than placated her, and that pissed her off.” Connor steals the cigarette from his fingers. “And if you truly cared for that girl, you’d realize that every time you smoke in this house, you set off her OCD.”
Sebastian’s lip twitches.
“You didn’t know that, did you?” Connor says. “While she cries on your shoulder about her company, yesterday she stayed the night at my apartment. And I spent four fucking hours calming her down because you put wild ideas in her head. You smoke, you mess with her things, and you return her to me restless. She paces back and forth, muttering idioms that make no sense, and I have to figure out how to put her back together. You are not a friend to her; you’re a parasite.”
I drop my pastry on my lap.
Sebastian is left speechless, his lips pressed tightly together.
Connor won this round. But when Rose enters the mix, I just hope he’s able to win the whole battle.
After Connor snuffs out the cigarette on his empty cup, he masterfully bottles his annoyance towards Sebastian, and his eyes fall to the scattered scantrons. “You should be taking those in a quiet testing environment, preferably somewhere clean.” His collects the gum wrappers, and Sebastian’s crinkled magazines, tossing them in a nearby trash bin.
“She’s fine,” Sebastian says, finding his voice again.
“What are you even doing here?” Connor asks. “If Lily’s taking her finals, she doesn’t need to be tutored anymore.”
“I’m monitoring the exams so she doesn’t cheat,” he lies. I want to snort, given the fact that minutes ago he offered to bubble-in my finals for me.
“I can do that,” Connor says. “Go propagate cancer somewhere else.” He takes a seat next to me—right on the same cushion where I buried the tests.
I hear the crunch and the crackle of papers, muffled but still distinguishable. I close my eyes and count to five in my head. This cannot be happening.
“Lily,” Connor says tensely, “am I sitting on porn?”
What?! I open one eye and meet Connor’s gaze. I expect him to be calm in the normal I’m-Connor-Cobalt-and-I-don’t-show-real-emotions kind of way. Instead, he wears disappointment fairly well. This is the moment where I can either out myself as a somewhat-cheater or take the hit for stashing porn. There’s no contest.
I spent days without self-love or any kind of sex from Lo, trying desperately to return to good faith with him. All of that will be squandered in one moment if he thinks it’s dirty mags. And I’m so sick of lying.
“It’s not porn,” I confess.
Connor stands and lifts up the cushion. He stares at the papers, the top exam with a random name (Jeremy Gore) and a letter grade (A-).
He shakes his head. “I knew it,” he says rather calmly, adding all the pieces together so easily. Must be a smart-person trait. I bet Sherlock Holmes was a certified genius.
Sebastian rolls his eyes and takes out his phone, as if this is all very dull for him, but I imagine that Connor has him shaking internally, a few more moves away from dethroning him in Rose’s life.
I gather up the tests before Connor tries to toss them out. I still have finals to take. “I can explain,” I say as I straighten out the papers on my lap.
He returns the cushion to its original state, and before I can offer an explanation, the front door swings open.
“Just because the bike can reach a hundred-fifty, doesn’t mean you should go that fucking fast. You nearly cut off a car behind you.”
“You’re exaggerating,” Daisy says.
“He honked at you.”
“Or he honked at you. You were riding my brake lights.”
“I was ten fucking feet behind you, and next time, I’m taking you to a race track.”
“Really?” I can hear the smile behind the word.
“Yeah, if you want to fucking kill yourself, at least you won’t cause a five-car pileup while you’re doing it.”
When they walk into the living room, Daisy is smiling from ear to ear. Both carry motorcycle helmets under their arms, reminding me that Ryke agreed to Daisy’s offer. About a week ago, he told her he would keep the black Ducati in return for teaching her how to ride safely, which must be a hard job with Daisy as a pupil.
“You were supposed to tutor her,” Connor says to Sebastian, actual anger seething in his eyes. It’s kind of terrifying.
Ryke and Daisy go quiet by the staircase, realizing they walked in on a…situation.
Sebastian pockets his phone in his blazer. “You and I both know that one is a lost cause. I did her a favor.”
“She doesn’t need another handout.” He invades Sebastian’s space again. “You’re a lazy sanctimonious prick who profits off of apathetic trust fund babies. The students who need those exams are the ones who can’t afford them. You knowingly perpetuate a repugnant cycle.” He stares at him like he’s shit on the bottom of his shoe. “You keep the rich kids stupid and the poor kids poor.”
“What’s going on?” Rose’s voice ices the entire room.
No one moves. She stands near Daisy and Ryke, who must have left the front door open. No one heard her walk in.
Sebastian slips out of Connor’s blockade. “I caught your boyfriend smoking that.” He points to the snuffed cigarette on the coffee cup. “And then he accused me of helping Lily cheat.”
Connor looks like he could kick Sebastian’s ass. And that face—one of pure venom—does not come often. Or at least, I’ve rarely seen it since we’ve been friends.
Rose glances at Ryke and Daisy for verification.
“We just got here,” Daisy says.
Ryke is not about to vouch for Connor either. They’re not the best of friends since their personalities clash more than compliment.
Rose doesn’t even ask me whether or not Sebastian helped me cheat or if Connor smoked all those cigarettes. I guess she won’t trust my answer anyway, even if I give her the right one.
But I have to try. “I did cheat,” I tell her in a high voice.
She ignores me. So much for honesty.
My sister approaches both guys and rests her hands on her hips, looking between them. Connor stares at her with such intensity, basically speaking through his soul-bearing eyes.
Rose engages with him, not able to tear away.
Sebastian panics and places a hand on her shoulder. “Rose, he’s manipulating you. It’s what he does.”
Rose flinches.
“Don’t doubt yourself,” Connor tells her. “Not for this guy, not for anyone.”
Rose wavers.
“Think about it,” Connor says. “You told me he’s profited off of selling old tests before.”
“The cigarettes—”
“You have known me for almost ten years. I have held you in my arms. I have kissed you. Have you ever smelled smoke on me before?”
Sebastian cuts in, “Rose, he convinced Brad to forfeit his Lambda Kai presidency so someone else could take the position. He can make people do things they would never do.”
Connor stares down at her. “I would never manipulate you.” But he doesn’t deny that he’s done it before, that he uses whatever power he has to get what he wants. I always knew Connor did things for his benefit, not out of the kindness of his heart, but hearing it from someone else, well, it makes it real.
Sebastian says, “He dated Hayley Jacobs just so her father would write him a recommendation to Wharton. He’s with you because of your name. How many times do I have tell you that?”
Rose’s eyes narrow at Connor. “Did my father write you a recommendation?”
“He offered, yes.”
“And you accepted?”
He says nothing.
“Unbelievable.” Her face twists like he stomped on her heart. I rise, about to go to her side. But I hesitate as she points a finger at Connor. “You came with me to my parent’s Sunday luncheons because you were trying to worm your way into my father’s good graces.”
“No, I came with you because you’re my girlfriend,” he says, stepping closer to her.
She raises her chin, which starts to quiver despite her strength. “I trusted you. And all this time—”
“I have never lied to you,” he says. “You know more about my life than anyone else. I don’t share things willingly, you know this about me. Why would I let you in?”
Rose whispers, “You’re playing with my head.”
“No,” he says again, forcefully so that she understands. “He is.”
Sebastian’s fingers dig deeper in her shoulder. “You’ve known me since we were children. I only have your best interest, Rose.”
But her eyes stay glued to Connor.
“Rose,” Connor says with such empathy, gazing at her with passion that nearly stops my heart. “You know me.”
She takes a deep breath. “That’s just it Connor, I don’t think I do. I don’t think anyone really does.”
Sebastian begins to smile, and Connor looks about ready to scream.
Rose adds, “I want you to leave.”
I can’t tell who she directs this to until Sebastian’s smile fades completely. “Rose, didn’t you hear—”
“I heard you,” she says. “I hear you talk badly about Connor every time I’m with you, and while I agree he’s not the most forthcoming human being when it comes to his personal life, he’s still my boyfriend. I would never allow Lily to cheat. I hate that you smoke. And I’m not going to take your suggestion to quit Calloway Couture. I’m going to unpack my office. I’m going to fight for my company. I’m going to do whatever it takes, and I’m going to stop listening to you tell me that I can’t beat these odds.”
Go Rose. I think we’re all smiling. Except for Sebastian.
He shakes his head at her. “I’ll call you tomorrow when you’re not being so bitchy.”
“You won’t,” she says. “I’m blocking your number. You’re not to see me or talk to me. I never want to hear from you again.”
His mouth falls. “You would listen to him? Rose, I’ve known you longer.”
“He knows me better.”
Sebastian just keeps shaking his head.
Rose glances at Connor, her shoulders locked tight. “Can you please get him out of the house? I need to go…” Her eyes flit away, looking for her room as though it’s vanished.
“Of course,” he says easily. His hand falls to the small of her back, and he whispers something in her ear before kissing her deeply. She returns the affection, but there’s sadness in her eyes that wasn’t there before—the stress of everything weighing on her. And I have a feeling Sebastian has added to it every single day.
When they part, Rose turns to me. And my guards rise. Oh no. She’s going to yell at me for cheating. I open my mouth, about to let out a string of sincere apologies, but her arms fling around my shoulders and she pulls me into a big, sisterly hug. One that she rarely gives, even when she’s in a good mood.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers in my ear. “I love you.” I feel her tears on my shoulder. “I’m here if you need me now. I promise.”
I don’t think I deserve this. I ruined her company, but at the same time, I am overwhelmed at having my sister’s support again. She’s my biggest and best cheerleader.
So I hug back. I want to ask if she’ll be okay with all of the Connor and Sebastian stuff, but she places a kiss on my cheek and spins towards her bedroom on the main floor.
Connor watches her carefully, and Rose meets his gaze for a single second, brushing her tears off her face. I think they can read each other’s minds or something because he nods to her and she nods back and disappears.
Connor guides Sebastian towards the exit.
Sebastian’s eyes flicker to the exams on my lap.
“You’re not getting them back,” Connor tells him.
“You know,” Sebastian says, “I hope you break her heart. She deserves what’s coming to her.”
“So do you,” Connor says, slamming the door on Sebastian’s face.
When the tension begins to eke out of the living room, Ryke says, “Well I fucking learned something today.” His lips rise. “Connor has balls.”
Connor takes a breath and any anxiety or anger disappears like the wind, undetectable by the average human eye. “Glad I could entertain you.” His eyes flicker between the hallway where Rose disappeared down and me.
He chooses me, which only puts a larger pit in my stomach. He stands in front of the couch, his hands slipping in his slacks.
“Do you really see me as an apathetic trust fund baby?” I ask, remembering some of the insults that inadvertently flew my way. I have been lazy and uncaring towards college. I should have tried harder.
“Technically you don’t have a trust fund anymore,” Connor tells me. His words don’t lift my spirits, and I don’t deserve a brightened day. I’m at fault here. “You should have told me you were cheating when I asked.”
“I can’t pass without the old exams,” I defend quickly.
“You can,” Connor retorts. “I’ve tutored you, and I know that if you just studied, you could pass.”
“I can’t take that chance. I bombed the first two tests. I’m already behind a semester, and if I fail these classes I’m going to be behind a whole year.” I hold the tests to my chest, unwilling to let them go over Connor’s moral compass. “It’s not cheating. It’s beating the system. Everyone does it.”
“You’ve already beat the system by being at Princeton. By being at Penn. If you didn’t have your last name, you’d be at a community college. Where you should be, Lily. How many times are you going to beat the system until it beats you to death?” His words are weighted and have more double meanings than I can process. “You don’t need an A. You’re going to be fine if you graduate with a low GPA at the bottom of the class. Do yourself a favor. Toss out those tests, and I’ll help you take your finals. I’ll make sure you learn the material to pass. I promise.”
“I have to turn them in by six o’clock today,” I say. “That’s not possible, Connor.”
“They’re take-home tests,” he reminds me. “You’re allowed to use your notes and your book. Just not old exams. We can make it happen.”
“We can all help,” Daisy exclaims with a smile. “I have the recipe for the perfect study brownies.”
Ryke gives her a look.
“Not those kind of brownies.”
The undertaking feels bigger than me, but I have support. “You should go talk to Rose,” I tell him. I don’t want to draw him away from her more than I already have.
“She’ll want to be alone right now,” he says. I’m not so sure about that, but he adds, “Trust me.” And for some reason, I do. Maybe Sebastian is right. Maybe Connor does have power in his words.
An hour later, I’ve finished a political science final and moved onto Stats. A tray of warm, gooey brownies emits a sweet chocolate aroma in front of me. I’m basically eating the entire plate. Daisy flips through her motorcycle magazine, not touching a single one.
