Текст книги "Wanting You"

Автор книги: Ryan Michele

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Текущая страница: 9 (всего у книги 11 страниц)

“Grams, what are you doing here?” I screeched.

Glancing over at Deke, I wanted to wipe the smile off his face. I didn’t know what the hell he found so damn amusing. Deke lay on my bed, shirt off, legs spread out, but crossed at the ankle. Yes, I was a grown-ass woman, but this was still Grams!

“I had to hear at the store from Grace what happened to you?” The disappointment and anger in Grams’s voice was enough to send me to my knees. I never wanted that.

“I’m sorry, Grams. I’ve been dealing with some stuff,” I said, ashamed.

“I know, but you should have called.”

“Yes, ma’am.” I hung my head.

“Son, can you give us a few minutes?” Grams pinned Deke with her stare.

“Absolutely, ma’am,” he said, climbing off the bed, wrapping his arms around my body and kissing my temple. “I’ll be in the living room,” he whispered in my ear.

Nodding, he turned to walk out the door. My eyes focused on his sculpted back, but noticed another tattoo that I hadn’t seen before. It looked like a puzzle piece that had been carved out of his body exposing muscle underneath, a small drop of blood hanging off the end. I needed to make sure to ask him about it.

14
Vann

“Grams, I’m sorry.” I rushed into her open arms, and she hugged me tightly.

“Why didn’t you tell me this was going on, baby girl?” Grams’s hand rubbed up and down my back rhythmically.

“I didn’t want to worry you,” I whispered.

“Nonsense. We both know your momma ain’t gonna help ya. You need to come to me.” Grams pulled away and stared at me. It was like I was five years old all over again.

“I’m sorry.” Tears I thought were dried up sprung out of my eyes and fell down my cheeks.

“Now. Now. Let’s sit.” Grams led me over to the bed, pulling the comforter up over the sheets. “I don’t want to sit in that.”

“Grams!” I yelled and couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped.

“Truth. Anyway talk.” Grams was always no nonsense, which was why I loved her so much. I let everything spill out of me as if it were something bad I ate, telling her every last detail, barely taking breaths as I went.

Grams wrapped her hands around mine and squeezed tight. “Okay. So what’s next?”

“I don’t know.” I didn’t know anything at the moment. Everything was happening so fast that it was all jumbled. I had a hard time putting words to any of it.

“No clue who this guy is?”

“No. Just fake names. Nothing real.” The tears began falling harder. I never thought having this career would lead to someone actually wanting to hurt me. The few ‘gifts’ were nothing harmful, but having someone actually want to rape me was hard to take.

“Deke gonna stay with you?” Grams asked as if she already knew the answer to the question.

My eyes shot to hers in surprise. “He wants me to stay with him. We haven’t really talked about it any further.”

“It’s good. You go with him. He’ll take care of you.”

“You’re not freaked out to see me with him?” I knew I talked a lot about Deke over the years, but to actually be with him now when I just got home was a little quick to the punch.

“Come on, baby girl. You’ve loved that boy for years. It’s about time he opens his eyes and sees you for the prize you are.”

Grams’s gleam in her eye made me blush. “Thanks Grams.”

“Truth. That’s all I speak. What’s this I hear about your daddy?”

I dropped my face, not wanting her to read my thoughts. “You heard that, too? Damn small town,” I grumbled.

“Yeah I did. Talk.” Grams slapped the back of my hand so I looked up at her.

Rolling my eyes, I told Grams all about the meeting with dad and meeting Sydney. “Grams, I just don’t know if I can let it go. I mean … I’ve been so mad at him for so long, and when I saw him … nothing came out. None of the anger … nothing.”

“That was probably because Sydney was there, baby girl. You were taught not to show that in front of the little ones. It’s not right.” Grams taught me that, Mom never did, another thing to be grateful for. “Baby girl, you don’t know the circumstances before your daddy ran around. Was it wrong? Yes. But you’re older now, so you gotta let him say his piece and hear him out.”

The whirlwind of emotions swimming through my head was sucking every bit of energy out of me. Suddenly I felt very tired.

“I can see you’re gonna fall asleep on me. I’ll talk to Keith if Zander hasn’t already. You need to get safe, but I need to know where you are no matter what.” Grams wrapped me back in her arms.

My spine stiffened a bit. I blurted, “I’m gonna stay here, Grams. I’m not gonna let some asshole throw me out of my own house.”

“Then you figure out what you need to do—blinds, security, and alarms,” Grams said without the disdain I thought she would have.

I hugged her harder. “I will. Thanks Grams.”

“I love you, baby girl.”

“Love you, too.”

Leaving the bedroom, we headed into the living room where Deke was sprawled out on the couch flipping through channels. Grams made no qualms about marching right up to him. “Son.” Her tone was strong and determined.

Deke turned off the TV and stood in front of Grams. “Yes, ma’am,” he said. Deke towered over her, causing Grams to look up a bit, but she was not intimidated in the least by his size.

Grams’s finger came out as she began waving it at Deke. “You take care of her, you hear me?”

Deke graced us with his beautiful smile. “Yes, ma’am.”

“And I don’t just mean in the bedroom.”

“Grams!” I gasped, not believing that just came out of her mouth.

Deke chuckled, tucking his hands into his pockets. “I’ll do my best. In and out.”

Was I hearing this conversation right? Grams was actually talking to Deke about sex … and Deke was going along with it? God help me.

“Uh huh. You stay with her … here. She doesn’t want to leave, so get a bag together and get over here,” Grams demanded. I stood there, speechless. Didn’t I just tell her that I would talk to Deke about that?

“Yes, ma’am.” Deke turned to me and winked. I opened my mouth to talk, but instantly shut it not knowing what to say.

Grams’s finger continued to wag, “Also, she’s gotta go see her Daddy tomorrow. You’ll make sure she safely gets there and back. Got it?”

Deke shuffled his feet, a smile playing on his lips. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Grams, I’m not a kid,” I groaned.

Grams turned to me, looking me straight in the eye. “You will take care of yourself. And you will let him help you.”

Looking into her beautiful blue eyes, I remembered how much I truly missed this woman. “Yes, ma’am.”

Grams began to step closer to Deke, and I couldn’t blame her, with no shirt on he looked hot with his muscles flexing, but it struck me a bit odd for Grams to be staring. “Son, come here,” Grams said.

Deke did without question, dwarfing her. Grams reached to the key around his neck, and Deke’s face lit up almost as if he was surprised. “Where’d you get this?” Grams’s voice shook as she asked. I didn’t know if it was with hurt or anger.

Deke looked slowly up at me as if looking for answers, but I had no idea where he got the thing. He looked down at Grams.

“I want the truth, son.” Her stern voice caught me off guard, and my eyes flew to her.

“No, ma’am, I wouldn’t lie.” Blowing out a deep breath, his eyes bore into mine, never moving. “I got it when I was in high school, ma’am.”

“Go on,” Grams said as if she knew there was more to the story.

“When Vann left, I was pissed … beyond pissed … and went to her house.”

“You did?” I gasped in surprise.

“Yeah. I looked around the place, but mostly anything personal was gone. I happened to be standing by the dresser when something shiny caught my eye. I reached in the drawer and pulled this key out.” Deke’s hand instantly went to the key and began rubbing it. “I put it on that moment and haven’t taken it off once since.”

“You’ve worn that for five years?” I stared at him in shock.

Deke broke eye contact from me and looked down at the ground, embarrassed. “Yeah.”

Grams cut through the moment. “Do you know what that is, son?”

Deke’s eyes shot up to Grams. “No, ma’am. It was just something to keep Vann close.”

Seeing Deke’s chest begin to rise and fall rapidly, my heart swelled. I wanted to run over to him and jump in his arms, but I stayed put wanting to hear this.

Grams stepped back from Deke, and for the first time, she got really quiet when she spoke. “Vann’s granddaddy gave that to me when he had to leave for the service. I wore it for years ‘til he came home.”

Surprise hit me. “Grams, how do I not recognize this? If it was in my drawer, shouldn’t I know what it is?”

Grams looked at me, her eyes showing a bit of wetness trying to escape. “I never gave it to you. I gave it to your momma. I don’t know why ... no, I take that back, I do. She was going through some old stuff, and I told her it would give her good luck.”

That still didn’t explain anything. “Really. Then how was it in my drawer?”

“Baby girl, I have no idea, but it looks like it’s gotten good use over the years.” Grams’s smile beamed up at Deke. “And don’t you worry, I’m not asking for it back.”

“No disrespect, ma’am,” Deke said clutching the key. “I couldn’t give it back to you if I tried. Sorry.” I stood there in awe, part stunned, part so in love I couldn’t breathe.

Grams came up to me and wrapped her arms around me. “I like him,” she whispered in my ear.

“Me too,” I whispered back.

“I’ve gotta head out. Remember what you said, boy. You protect my girl.” Grams patted Deke on the arm.

Deke eyes drifted to me. “Yes, ma’am. I will.”

And just like a tornado, she’d stirred things up and left silence in her wake.

Deke

I couldn’t believe that Grams recognized the key around my neck. I’d worn it for so long that it was a part of me, just like Vann had been since we were kids, but I felt a bit tongue-tied in talking about it. Embarrassed a bit, but damn. When Vann first saw it and didn’t recognize it, I was relieved that I didn’t have to explain, but now the news was out.

I couldn’t help but love Grams. She did all my hard work for me in convincing her. Yes, I wanted Vann at my place, but that was for purely selfish reasons. I wanted her in my bed. I’d never had a woman there. Ever. But I wanted Vann.

“So, you think you’re gonna move in here?”

“Yep,” I said, pulling her into me. Wrapping my arms around her, I loved the way she molded to my body as if she was made for me. Bending down to her lips, I brushed mine softly against hers.

Cutting right to the chase, Vann whispered against my lips, “You’ve been wearing a key for five years to remind yourself of me, huh?”

“It appears so.”

“You weren’t gonna tell me?”

“Didn’t plan on it.”

“Why?”

“You’d think I was a pussy.”

Vann crushed her lips to mine before pulling away all too quickly. “Not a pussy at all big guy. I think it’s the sexiest …” Vann’s lips touched mine again. “… fucking thing …” And again. “I’ve heard …” Vann kissed me hard before pulling away. Damn if I didn’t want to pull her to me, but I needed to let her take the lead … for the moment.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Want me to show you just how sexy?”

I groaned. “Hell yeah.”

Vann’s breath hitched, and shit, I loved hearing that. My lips met hers, and the air around us turned like a switch going into need and want. After she rode me in her bedroom, I hadn’t been able to shake the hard-on I was left with. But I wanted to prove to her that she meant more to me than just sex.

I just didn’t know how long I could hold out. She was so damn irresistible and I’d waited five long, agonizing years to have her again. My body craved hers and right now it was in charge.

Reaching around, I laced my hands through her soft blonde hair angling her body to get deeper. She met me kiss for kiss, pulling and sucking me closer into her. Breaking away, she asked, “Where are Sawyer and Kinsley?”

“They left.”

“Good.” Vann dropped down to her knees in front of me. Just the sight alone made my cock grow painfully large. As she unbuckled my pants, she pulled my dick out and stroked it. Having Vann on her knees below me was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.

Her strokes took me to another place in my head, the pleasure so intense I felt I could burst. Vann’s tongue darted out as she licked the underside of my cock, causing me to gasp. I’d had plenty of blowjobs in my day, but this … this was different.

Vann sucked me into her mouth, my dick touching the back of her throat. It took everything I had not to blow in that second. As she sucked, licked, and rubbed, it was like I was on another planet and didn’t want to return to Earth.

“Baby, I’m gonna come in your mouth if you don’t stop.” I looked down to see her beautiful blue-gray eyes looking up at me with a slight smirk on her lips. She continued to stroke and suck faster than before sending me in a downward spiral.

Grabbing the back of her head, my hips began to piston in her mouth. One ... two ... three … “Vann …” drawled out of my mouth as I came down her beautiful throat.

Looking down, Vann had swallowed every single drop I gave her and was now licking all the remnants off my cock. As our eyes met, Vann gave my dick a small kiss on the tip and stood to meet me.

Grabbing her, I devoured her mouth tasting myself on her, and I took more until she was withering underneath me. I laid her gently on the couch, falling on top of her.

My once sated dick was already getting hard again. I just couldn’t get enough of this woman, and I figured I would show her. Reaching down, I pulled her sweatpants down, ripping them away from her body.

“Deke,” she spoke, breathless.

“Yeah?”

“Please.”

“You got it, babe.”

Spreading her legs wide, I knelt down to feast on her beautiful pussy. I slid my tongue down each of her lips, sucking in her sweet taste. “You’re so wet, Vann.”

“Yes.”

My tongue began to stroke harder, finding every nook and nerve to hit. I ate her as if she was my last meal and I was a starving man. And I was about to die if I didn’t have her.

Vann’s hips began grinding against my tongue, her hands quickly finding my hair. I let her guide me exactly where she wanted me, and I sucked, licked, and tasted until she screamed my name. Her body responded by giving me a very sweet treat on my tongue.

“In. Now.” Looking up in Vann’s eyes, they were desperate and wanting. Shucking off my jeans the rest of the way, I kissed her hard, my cock just barely touching the lips of her pussy.

Vann’s hands gripped my ass, pushing me down to her. “It’s coming,” I teased.

“Now. Deke. Now,” she begged.

With that, I slammed into her all the way to my root, causing her to scream like I’d never heard her in my life. “God yes!”

As my body pounded into hers, I sucked in every word and moan that came out of her body. The fact that I was giving her this much pleasure was such a huge fucking turn on. I rose up so I could see Vann’s and my connection. Seeing myself glide deep in and out of her, combined with Vann’s look of pure enjoyment, spurred me to pump harder than I’d ever done before. I wanted Vann to come hard so she would never forget this moment.

I felt my balls start to rise and the familiar tingle in my spine. I began rubbing Vann’s clit. “Vann, you gotta come baby.” As if she needed my permission, she set off like a bomb exploding over and over and over again. Mine crashed through me as I watched Vann come again.

I would never get tired of seeing her do that. “Oh my God,” she panted.

“Good?”

“I’ve never had an orgasm like that before.”

“Good, I’ll give them to you all the time.”

“What was that?”

“An explosion.”

“Damn right.”

I fell, lying on the floor next to her, unable to move. Vann rolled off the couch and landed on top of me with an oomph. “Sorry. Didn’t want to be alone up there.”

“Vann, you never have to be alone again.”

“What’s this?” Kinsley’s voice boomed through the front door, swinging it open. I immediately covered up Vann, trying not to smile at her surprised expression.

“Well … well … well. What do we have here?” Z’s voice came from behind Kinsley’s.

“Stop looking at my girl.” I glared at Z.

Z smiled. “Oh. Now she’s your girl.”

“Damn right. And I suggest your eyes go somewhere else. Considering she’s also your cousin,” I growled.

“Only by marriage.”

“Damn girl. I love that couch … how am I gonna sit there now and not think of this? Come to think of it, can you do it again so I could watch?”

“Kinsley!” Vann’s face was the color of a tomato, and I didn’t think she liked the smirk on my face by the glare she was giving me.

“Sure Kinsley. Why not?” I joked back.

“Stop it!” Vann yelled.

“Come on, you’re both hot. It would be fun to watch.”

“Kinsley. Stop it! You’re not watching us! Go somewhere so I can get dressed.”

“Why? I wanna watch.”

“Dammit, Kinsley!” Vann screamed.

Chuckling, Kinsley grabbed Z. “Come on copper … let’s give these two a minute or thirty seconds. Then we can rush back in and look.”

The laugh I was suppressing came out in full. Looking at Vann, I could see the tips of her lips wanting to join me but trying desperately to hold back. Grabbing her, I began tickling her everywhere.

That produced the laughter I was looking for. Keeping up the pace, I touched and grabbed every part on her I could find. “Deke! Stop! Please! Come on!”

Lying back down on the floor, Vann immediately got up and threw her sweats on. “Would you put on your pants?”

“It’s a lot more fun with them off, right?”

“Yes. But put them on. Now!”

Chuckling, I pulled up my jeans, just in time for Z and Kinsley to walk in the room.

“Dressed?” Kinsley asked full of hope.

“Yep.”

“Damn it!” Kinsley yelled.

15
Vann

Eating dinner with Deke and Z was like eating with an entire football team gorging before a big game and after. Deke’s excuse: “You wore me out, babe.” Who the hell knew what Z’s was, but I did notice the moment Sawyer stepped in the room, Z’s total demeanor changed. He sat up a little taller, there were light brushes of his hand on her arm … if I hadn’t been paying attention, I would have missed it because of its subtlety.

Deke was actually taking this whole moving in thing seriously. I didn’t have the heart to tell him no. Who the hell was I kidding? I could say no ‘til I was blue in the face, and he wouldn’t listen. Grams already backed him up, so I was screwed there for help. And really, I wanted him here … with me … in my bed … holding me just like he was doing at the moment.

Listening to his breathing go in and out was the most calming sound I’d ever heard. Add in his sexy ass smell and I couldn’t help but snuggle up closer on his chest. Grabbing the key resting on his pec, my fingers glided over the cool metal.

I searched my memory trying to recollect if Mom ever told me about this key, but nothing came up. I didn’t even recall how it got in my drawer, but damn was I glad it was there.

The fact that Deke found it and wore it for five years blew my mind and my heart. I always knew I loved that man, but this … right here … made me love him even more, and that scared the living shit out of me. He could destroy me, but I knew I couldn’t turn away from him. Ever.

Here I thought he was so pissed at me he wanted nothing to do with me, yet he held me close to his heart for five years without even thinking twice about it. Happiness swept through my body, my arms instantly wrapping tightly around Deke, squeezing him to me. I knew I was a lost cause.

“Hey.” Deke’s gravelly voice was sexy as hell.

“Sorry to wake you up.”

“You okay?”

“Yeah. I actually am.”

“You sure? No nightmares?”

“No. I haven’t been to sleep yet for that, but thanks for putting those thoughts in my head.”

Deke chuckled in response.

“If you were so mad, why did you wear this?” The long silence that drew felt like years. I lay on his chest, continuing my massage of the key around his neck.

Finally Deke spoke. “Hurt. I was hurt. But I missed you.” Deke took a long pause, breathing in and out slowly. “You were all I had, and when you left … I had nothing.”

“Did things ever get better with your folks?”

“No. Mom died hating me. Dad tolerates me, but that’s about all.”

“I’m sorry … You know I missed you, too.”

“I do know. Now.”

“I didn’t want to leave you.”

“You’re here now. Get some sleep, babe.” Deke kissed the top of my head as I snuggled closer to him.

My eyes grew heavy, but I had a question that I needed answered. “Deke?”

“Yeah,” he mumbled.

“Tell me about the tattoo on your back. The puzzle piece.”

“Pieces,” he corrected.

“Huh? I thought I only saw one.” Deke pulled out of my arms and rolled to his stomach. Kneeling before him, I studied the tat. It was one large puzzle piece, but the large piece was cut into three smaller pieces that were all connected to each other. The large piece looked as if it was cut from Deke’s skin. I traced it with my fingertip. “Tell me about it.”

Deke let out a large sigh. “This must be the day for all the skeletons to come out.” He groaned. “The pieces make up the three people who left me: Jaxson, Mom, and you.”

My heart lurched as he continued, “The piece is out of my body because the it is missing from me.”

“Oh, Deke.” I leaned down, kissing the tattoo. “I’m so sorry.”

Deke rolled over, circling his arms around me. “You’re here now. That’s all that matters.” His lips touched mine in the sweetest kiss before he pulled away. “Get some sleep.”

“K, ‘night.”

It took me a while to come down from the revelations of the day, but hearing Deke’s breathing slow, I finally drifted off.

* * *

Waking up, I felt like I was in a warm cocoon. Deke’s entire body was draped around me, practically lying on top of me. I loved it. I loved him, not that I would tell him that.

Deke’s hips bounced, causing me to jump. “Morning.” His gruff voice was sexy as hell.

“Morning,” I whispered softly.

“How are ya this mornin’?” Deke’s hand brushed across my face, sending chills down my spine.

“I’m good. I’ve got you here, what’s not to be happy about.” Looking up, Deke’s eyes flashed to something I couldn’t read. “What?”

“I’m moving in here with you.”

“You are … huh?” I grinned.

“Your Grams’s orders. I just wanna make sure you remember that from last night.” Deke’s voice was muffled as he continued to talk into my neck.

“It’s a good thing I’m in a good mood then, huh?”

“You want me here?” Deke raised his head, his eyes latching onto mine.

More than you could ever know. “Yeah. This is nice.”

“I’ll show you nice.” Deke’s mouth found mine, crushing down into a passionate kiss. All thoughts of morning breath were lost as only thoughts of him inside me swam in my head.

* * *

The day flew by. Deke needed to go pick up his things and stop by the bar, and I needed some time to get things organized. I called the security company, who ended up putting cameras up outside and some high-tech system that only Kinsley knew how to work.

I tried my damnedest to get some writing done, but that didn’t go so hot. I just couldn’t get in the groove. Most of my thoughts were on this moment right here, sitting in my dad’s driveway. After arguing with everyone that I could drive myself and didn’t need every one of them coming with me, I drove.

“You’re not going alone,” Deke growled. “If you don’t want me going, then take one of the girls.”

“No. I’ll be fine. I’m just going to Dad’s, and I’ll meet up with you at Sully’s. I’ll text you and call when I’m leaving. I’ll be fine.” I wasn’t backing down from this. There was no way I was showing up at my father’s new home to meet his new family with a security detail.

“No,” He growled. “Not happening.”

“You are not telling me what I can and can’t do. That is not how this works, Deke Sullivan!” I yelled at him.

“You don’t know me well, do you? I’ll be following you. Once you get there and you’re in the house, I’ll go to Sully’s. You call me before you get ready to leave, and I’ll come meet you,” he said as he scowled at me.

I stared at the man in front of me. Part of me wanted to kick him in the balls for being an ass. The other part wanted to hug him for caring about me. “Fine.”

Pulling up to my dad’s house, I could see Deke’s headlights reflecting the area around my car. Giving him a small wave, I made my way up to the house. I couldn’t help but feel a little cheated. The house was beautiful with flowers all in front and looked happy, and damn if I hadn’t had that since before he left.

The front door flew open as Sydney ran down the small steps. All thoughts of getting the hell out of there vanished as soon as I saw her excitement. I’d always wanted a sister, I just never envisioned getting one like this.

“Savannah!” she yelled.

“Remember, I told you to call me Vann.”

“Daddy says your name is Savannah, and that is what I should call you.”

I smiled at her sweetly, wondering why the hell my dad didn’t want her calling me Vann. “I told her that because I call you Savannah. I never liked the name Vann.” Dad stepped down the steps toward me.

I stared at him. I thought that he’d gotten over his dislike for the name a long time ago. He said it reminded him of a van not his little girl. “It’s okay.”

“I’m glad you came.”

“I told you I would.”

“Come on in. I want you to meet Julie.” The chill through my body held me on the spot. “It’s okay,” Dad whispered, grabbing my hand and pulling me toward the front door.

Sydney grabbed my other hand. “I can’t wait to show you my room!” She was so excited, and it helped to relieve some of the tension.

I’d hated Julie for years, and now that I was in her home, I actually feared her. What did she have that my mom didn’t? What does she look like now? I’d only seen her a few times, but never really met her. I felt my anxiety grow, but kept focused on the little girl holding my hand.

She was too excited for me to let down, and I wouldn’t, no matter how uncomfortable.

Entering the front door, a huge sign that looked vaguely familiar hung on the wall. It read: ‘God Bless this Home.’

My heart broke a bit at the realization that this was their home no matter how much I wanted to hate being here; I needed to respect it.

“Savannah!” a very feminine, high-pitched voice called from down the hallway. As the petite, long blonde haired woman came down the hall rubbing her hands with a towel, I could instantly see how Dad could fall for her. She was beautiful. Her face lit up as she got closer to me.

Arms extended, she reached for me giving me a huge hug, and rather than be rude, I limply returned it. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Thank you for having me.”

“You are always welcome here.”

I pulled away and looked in her eyes. What I saw was someone who was very genuine in her words. There was no anger in them whatsoever. I thought there might be some considering I was his first wife’s kid. But nothing but happiness? “Thanks.”

“Come see my room!” Sydney grabbed my arm and began to pull me.

“Sydney. Give Savannah time to say hi.”

“But Daddy, I’ve waited a really, really, really, long time to show her my room. Please!”

Dad smiled down at Sydney. “Do you mind, Savannah?”

“Not at all.” Sydney squealed and began to pull me down to her room. I couldn’t help the huge smile that spread across my face. Grams was right. I needed to meet Sydney and actually try and build something with her. She was my sister. That was still difficult, but I was becoming more accepting of it.

“Look!” Sydney led me into a pink princess paradise. Everything except the carpet was pink—walls, bedding, furniture, curtains, and pillows—and all different shades of pink. It reminded me of bubble gum bubbles. “Come look at my Barbie house!”

She led me over to this monstrosity of a house that was taller than she was with three levels and furniture galore. A little girl’s dream. “Which is your favorite?”

“Barbie and the Pop Star, of course.” Her tone suggested that I should have known that tidbit of information already. Sydney flashed this Barbie at me that had pink and purple stripes in her hair along with a rocker dress and guitar. I didn’t remember Barbies like this when I was growing up.

“This is cool.” The Barbie station lasted all of about five minutes then we moved on to these things called LaLa Loopsies that looked like crazy dolls with buttons all over them. I didn’t get these. Then it was on to Polly Pockets, which had all these little bitty pieces. I vaguely remembered these, but mine looked nothing like this. Then on to the baby dolls.

“Look Savannah! This one I can feed, and it pees.” She handed me the peeing doll, and I couldn’t help but look at its crotch to see if I was gonna get wet. “And this one I can feed special food.” She handed me the food bandit. “And this one is a water baby Grover.”

“What does it do?” After asking, I rethought if I should have.

“Mommy puts warm water inside and then it’s all cuddly. And these are all my other babies. I have lots of names for them.”

Sydney began handing me all of her babies, naming them off so quickly I couldn’t keep up.

“You girls ready to come to dinner?” My Dad peeked his head inside of the door, smiling at me. I couldn’t help but return it as I sat there with a load of babies in my arms.

“No!” Sydney yelled.

“I know you’re excited to have Savannah here, but we need to feed her.”

“Can we come back?” Her excited little voice had me enthralled.

“Yeah. I’ll come back up here with you. Let’s see what your mommy made for dinner.”

Sydney reluctantly walked out of the room. “Come on,” Dad called. “Are you okay?”

“Yep. Why?”

“You are really quiet. I don’t remember you ever this quiet.”

I rolled my eyes. “Dad, I grew up.”

“I saw you roll your eyes, young lady.” He chuckled. “Some things never change.”

Heading to the table, Julie had it set with plates, silverware, and even a candle decoration with greens all around it in the middle. When she came in carrying a bowl, I immediately asked, “You need any help?”

“No, thank you. You are our guest. I want you to sit and relax.”

“Savannah, sit here!” Sydney called from across the room, patting the chair next to hers. As I glided into the chair, I couldn’t help the feeling of surrealness I got. A happy family dinner, which I couldn’t even remember the last time I had.

Even when dad was home, dinners never seemed to be like this, all sitting at the table together and actually smiling, but the awkwardness was still there.

“Savannah, how are you?”

“I’m good, Dad.” I began eating the meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and corn that were put on my plate, suddenly not feeling like eating, but rather, forcing myself to.