Текст книги "Crazy Beautiful"

Автор книги: Penny Dee

сообщить о нарушении

Текущая страница: 13 (всего у книги 19 страниц)

HARLOW

Vengeance performed a late afternoon time slot just as the sky turned a soft shade of pink and gold. It was a magical time of day. The searing summer heat was cooled by a breeze that blew across the music festival, bringing an atmosphere of excitement amongst the 20,000 strong crowd.

Piper and I watched from the sidelines, perched on stage risers. When Vengeance appeared on stage the crowd erupted with appreciation and goosebumps covered every inch of my skin.

From the moment he opened his mouth, Heath owned them. His voice was powerful, his pitch clear, his tone perfect. His charisma won the crowd over as he spoke to them in between songs, usually whipping them into a frenzy and leaving them wanting more. It was easy to see that this was a band that was going to conquer the world someday. And it was hard not to grin like a fool as I watched my man strut his sexy ass across that stage.

Their set was only fifty minutes and it went by so quickly. But the crowd wasn’t finished with them. Twenty thousand people chanted as one, demanding an encore: Vengeance, Vengeance, Vengeance.

So the guys obliged with another two songs. And Heath’s dimples were deep as he walked back on stage to a thunderous applause.

When they finally came off stage, he was pumped. But I didn’t get to see him straight away. People—industry types—flocked to them. Piper and I watched from our vantage point on the stage risers as they talked with their manager and several people I didn’t know. Heath looked up and caught my eye. He winked and smiled.

When he finally got to me he stepped between my legs and I wrapped them around him tightly as he stretched up to kiss me.

Piper squealed and leapt off the riser into Jesse’s arms, who then whisked her away to meet a singer from one of the headlining bands.

“Come down here and kiss your man properly,” Heath said.

I grinned and slid down from the riser and into his big arms. He was covered in sweat.

“You’re very aromatic,” I joked, wrinkling my nose at his sweat.

“Babe, that’s the smell of awesome,” he said, using a towel he had around his neck to wipe his face.

Piper bundled over to us, a ball of red hair and red hot energy. “We were just speaking to Fletcher Wilkington from Viper and he said a few of the bands were heading over to a club called SkyLab. We were going to check it out too, you guys want to come with us?”

I looked at Heath who seemed cool with it. I nodded. “Sure, sounds like a plan.”

He nodded just as Tommy appeared with a stunning brunette dressed in a short blue dress and the longest legs I’d ever seen on a human being. Her long, iron-straight black hair was pulled over one shoulder and plunged past her large cleavage.

She was smiling broadly.

At Heath.

Her vibrant blue eyes twinkled across at him through false lashes.

I felt Heath tense next to me.

Tommy looked like he’d just won the lottery. “Guys, this is Mia. She’s with the record label– ”

“Well you look a lot happier than when I saw you last.” She directed her words at Heath, ignoring the rest of us, and her lips curled seductively as she spoke.

My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. I didn’t like the way she was looking at him. Like she was about to eat him. Or worse. Like she had already had him and was coming back for seconds.

“You guys know each other?” Tommy asked innocently.

Heath looked uncomfortable. Mia, on the other hand, looked like the cat that ate the cream and seemed oblivious to the rest of us standing there with them.

“Yes … we met yesterday,” She said, her eyes not leaving his face. “Maybe this time I’ll buy you a drink.”

Piper looked at me, whereas Heath couldn’t meet my eyes. My spine tingled with an awful foreboding.

“Oh Jesus,” Tommy muttered.

I knew I had to say something. To let the bitch know in no uncertain terms who she was standing next to and that flirting with my guy in front of me was really uncool.

When she licked her lips like she was about to eat him, I stepped forward and offered her my hand. “Since Heath seems to have lost his tongue I should introduce myself. I’m Harlow. His girlfriend.”

Her well-shaped brows rose high on her forehead and then dropped. She smiled mischievously. Blue eyes glittered over me as she took my hand, but turned back to look in Heath’s direction.

“Well he didn’t seem to have lost his tongue yesterday. I can vouch for that.”

I dropped her hand.

Up until that point I had been prepared to give Heath the benefit of the doubt. Being the girlfriend of the lead singer of a band meant you had to tolerate a certain amount of bad behavior from the girls who wanted to get their hands on him. I accepted that. But this? This was beyond bad behavior.

It was glaringly obvious that Heath and this girl had done something together the day before which had involved drinking and tongues. Just because I was naïve with a lot of things, didn’t make me stupid.

“I think you’d better go now,” Piper snapped. All four-foot nothing of her stepped between the girl and me. And when she didn’t move, Piper glared up at her ready to strike. “What? All that fake tan make you deaf? Get the fuck out of here!”

With another smoldering look at Heath the she-devil in the blue dress sauntered off, throwing a smug backwards glance at me.

My face was stiff, my throat cold and I was unable to swallow. Piper shot a murderous look in Heath’s direction. She took my hand. “Are you okay?”

I had no words because my heart had vomited itself into my throat.

“Don’t let it bother you, Harlow. She’s lying. Girls like that like to cause trouble.” She shot another stare-of-death at Heath and warned, “She’d better be lying!”

For the first time since Mia had appeared Heath met my eyes. And I knew. Right then. I knew.

“But she’s not lying, is she Heath,” I said in a strange alien voice.

His lack of denial was like a slap on my cheek. Heath had been with her the day before.

I was mindful of where we were. That being in the middle of a music festival was no place to have the confrontation we were about to have. Despite my growing realization and my hurt, I was still capable of thinking rationally and knew I had to get out of there.

“Baby—” He reached for me but I pushed his hand away.

“Tell me she’s lying,” I demanded.

“After I saw you with Colton—”

“You went and stuck your tongue down the throat of some random girl?” I seethed. But when he still couldn’t meet my eyes I felt the oxygen leave my lungs. Oh God no. “You had sex with her?” I cried out.

“Harlow, please …” He stepped towards me.

“Tell me you didn’t have sex with her!” I exclaimed, quickly stepping away from him. “Tell me!”

His silence sucked away every morsel of hope.

“No!” I sobbed.

“It was a mistake.” He grabbed me by the arms and gave me a little shake to make me look at him. “It didn’t mean anything. I was drunk. I’d just seen you with Colton …”

I found him through my tears and suddenly wanted to hurt him. I wanted to hurt him so bad. I wanted to punch him. To open hand slap him across his face. Yell at him. Scream at him. I wanted to take him out with the most hurtful words I could muster.

But I did none of that. Instead, I pushed him away in disgust and fled. I ran blindly through the backstage area, pushing past festivalgoers in my urgency to get away. I could hear both Heath and Piper calling after me but I didn’t stop. I was desperate to get away, afraid of what I would feel once I stopped running.

Thankfully there was a cab waiting by the exit and I hurriedly climbed in. Slumping into the backseat I held off my tears and closed my eyes to the powerful thud of my rapidly beating heart. I didn’t want to know the details. I didn’t want the mental images playing out in my mind. I just wanted to run from the hurt that was chasing me and nipping at my heels.

Remembering I didn’t have a room key I hurried across the marble foyer of the hotel to the reception desk. Unfortunately I was stuck behind a group of non-English speaking tourists who were testing the patience and organizational skills of the hotel receptionist.

After an agonizing wait the flushed-cheeked receptionist—her name badge identified her as Sophie—gestured me over to her and apologized for the delay.

Carefully I explained my predicament. But even as I spoke I realized it wasn’t going to work. Heath had checked in alone, so I probably looked like a desperate groupie trying to get into his room. She apologized and looked genuinely sorry, but said she wouldn’t be able to let me into the room.

“It’s okay Sophie, I’m here now. I can let her in.”

I swung around. Heath was standing right behind me looking flushed from running. He nodded politely at Sophie who looked relieved. I thanked her quietly and stalked off towards the elevator, desperate to get my stuff and leave.

“Whatever you plan on saying to me, don’t,” I said, angrily jabbing at the elevator button.

“Please let me explain.”

“I don’t want to hear it.”

“Don’t throw this away Harlow. Not over my fuck up.”

“You cheated on me. What do you expect me to do?” I jabbed relentlessly at the elevator button until the doors opened.

“I thought you were dumping me for Colton,” he said desperately, following me into the elevator.

“So you stick your dick into the next available vagina? Are you kidding me?” I felt my voice rise and echo around the elevator. I stopped myself. I didn’t want to do this. “No. I’m not doing this. I don’t want to know. I don’t need to know the gruesome details. I’m going to get my things.”

The elevator doors opened and I stormed out.

“Please … Harlow, don’t leave. We need to talk about this.”

I swung around, armed with a pointed finger. “No. You need to talk about this. Not me. I need to get my stuff and leave.”

I stopped at the door to the room, waiting for Heath to unlock it. But instead of opening the door and letting me in, he blocked the doorway.

“I can’t let you go back to California without talking about this,” he said desperately.

“Let me into the room, Heath.”

“Promise me you’ll hear me out?”

“You’re not in any position to demand anything here.”

I expected some smart assed comment about me being the one locked out and him having the key, but it never came. Instead, he reluctantly stood aside so I could walk in.

“I’m afraid if I let you leave that I’ll never see you again.”

“That’s the plan!” I snapped angrily, grabbing my overnight bag and shoving yesterday’s clothes into it.

“Don’t say that …” he begged.

“Why? There’s no point beating around the bush. We are through Heath.”

He quickly crossed the distance between us but stopped abruptly when he reached me.

“Baby, I fucked up. I really fucked up, I know that. But I was hurting. When I saw you with Colton, I lost my mind. I thought you had dumped me. I was in agony. I started drinking on the plane. I just needed something to take the pain away. Next thing, I’m in a toilet cubicle with some stranger.”

My head shot up and I straightened. “You had sex with her in a toilet cubicle? On a plane?”

Utterly repulsed I stormed over to the bed to retrieve my boxer shorts from the tangle of sheets. Horror tore through me and I stopped suddenly, swinging around to face him.

“Oh God … that’s why you wouldn’t make love to me last night,” I whispered. The weight of what was unfolding collapsed against my chest and I swallowed hard.

“I couldn’t … not when … not on the same day …” He ran his hand through his hair. “I couldn’t do that to you.”

My eyes shot red-hot anger at him. “Yet fucking some random skank in an airplane toilet cubicle is perfectly acceptable.”

“I’m so sorry baby, you have to believe me,” he cried desperately.

“I don’t have to do anything other than get the hell out of this hotel room.”

I zipped my bag and went to leave. But Heath grabbed my arm.

“I love you Harlow. Please don’t leave me.”

His words reminded me of our early morning lovemaking and the absence of any protection between us. I stopped. Horrified.

“Oh God … tell me you used protection.”

“You’re the only woman I’ve ever been with without a condom. I promise you.”

I suddenly hated him.

“Your promises mean nothing Heath. Not after this.”

I threw my bag strap over my shoulder, ready to walk out, but Heath stopped me. He looked distraught, his eyes full of tears.

“I am begging you Harlow … don’t leave me.” His voice trembled with emotion. “I always knew you were too good for me. And when I saw you with Colton … I thought you had decided to get back with him. I swear to God. Since you’ve been in my life I’ve never wanted another woman. You’re all I want. All I need. And if you stay … baby if you stay, I promise you I will never touch another woman for the rest of our lives together. Just give me another chance and I swear you won’t regret it.” He grabbed my hand. “Just stay.”

His words did little to penetrate the wall of hurt around me. It had gone up the moment I realized he had cheated on me.

I looked at him as if seeing him for the first time and reefed my hand away. I had to get away. I couldn’t stand being in the same room with him a moment longer. There was no way in hell I was going to let him see the meltdown I could feel building beneath my calm façade. He had broken my heart and I needed to be as far away from him as possible when I fell apart.

“Don’t touch me,” I snapped coldly, my jaw tense, my body tingling with heartache. “You don’t get to touch me anymore.”

“Don’t say that,” he begged and then seeing me head for the door, tried stopping me. “Don’t leave … not like this … I can explain …”

My face was thin ice and about to crack.

“Okay, explain. Did you have sex with that girl yesterday?”

“Harlow, I thought—”

“Did you have sex with that girl yesterday?” I yelled the question at him.

“Yes.”

Hearing him admit to it was like a cannon ball to the stomach and for a moment I faltered because it knocked the wind out of me.

But then I straightened and adjusted the bag strap over my shoulder. My face was stiff with heartache but I held it together.

“There. You’ve explained it to me. Plain and simple.”

I shouldered past him and yanked open the door but paused in the doorway to look at him. Anger, hurt and humiliation hijacked my tongue.

“I knew you were trouble when I met you. But like a fool I trusted you. I should have listened to my instincts because now I am the one paying for it.” I glared at him, ready to deliver the final blow. “I wish I had never met you.”

I knew my words were cruel and I knew they broke him because his face crumpled as I said them. He slumped down onto the bed and buried his face in his hands.

But I didn’t care. I was too hurt to care. So I turned and left, not bothering to look back.

Chapter Sixteen HEATH

My self-loathing was palpable.

I lay motionless on the bed, staring into the dull light breaking through the curtains. I was numb with grief. I didn’t know how long it had been since Harlow had left me but going by the constant ringing of my cell I gathered it had been a while. I didn’t bother answering it.

At first I had hoped it was Harlow ringing me to tell me she had calmed down and was willing to talk things through. But it wasn’t. And the fact I’d even thought that told me what a delusional fuck I was. Harlow would never talk to me again. I didn’t deserve her talking to me again. In fact I had never deserved anything from her. She was right. I should have left her alone right from the very beginning, because she was so much better off without me fucking up her life.

The ache of her absence was overwhelming. Everything hurt and I wasn’t sure how I was going to cope without her in my life.

It was crazy everything could turn upside down within a blink of an eye.

Only forty-eight hours ago my life had been a dream. I was a king, living the dream. I was in a band that was growing in popularity, surrounded by good friends and with the most amazing girl for a girlfriend.

Now I was a cheating loser, alone in an unfamiliar hotel room in Vegas with a bottle of bourbon for comfort, and a big fucking hole in my heart.

I’d done a good job confirming what I’d known all along. That I was an asshole who didn’t deserve her. She was too good for me. And I had just done a brilliant job in proving it.

A knock at the door bought me back to my gloomy reality. My first instinct was to ignore it and disappear even further into the bottle of bourbon. But the idea that it might be Harlow threw me off the bed.

But of course it wasn’t Harlow.

Because she hates you now. Remember asshole?

It was Piper and Jesse.

I hesitated, wanting to be left alone to drink myself stupid and indulge in my very own pity party for one.

“We know you’re in there Heath,” Piper called out.

I opened the door and let them in. “Have you heard from her?”

“She’s at the airport waiting for a flight back to John Wayne. Her flight leaves in an hour.” Piper dumped her bag on the table, walked over to me and slammed me in the chest with both palms. “You’re an idiot! You fucked a random girl? In an airplane toilet?”

“Piper—” Jesse started, but was cut off by a warning look from his feisty girlfriend.

She shook her head and thrust her hands on her hips.

Ashamed, I looked down at my bare feet, ready to cry, ready to punch the fuck out of the walls. This misery was like nothing I’d ever known and even though I knew I deserved it, I was desperate for it to stop.

“I fucked up Piper. I fucked up real bad.” I had to raise my eyes to the ceiling to stop the tears and exhaled deeply. “Tell me what to do and I will do it. Tell me how to get her back. Should I go after her?”

Piper was projecting four foot nothing of pure disgust. She glared at me but then she shook her head and sighed.

“Give her a chance to cool down. If you go after her now you’re just going to upset her more.” She looked at the almost empty bottle of Jack on the bed. “That’s not going to help.”

“It’ll help get me through tonight.”

“Piper’s right, Heath. If you want to fix your fuck up, annihilating a fifth of bourbon isn’t going to help. You need a clear head to work out your game plan, man,” said Jesse.

“Yeah? And what’s that? She’s never going to forgive me.”

“Probably not. But it doesn’t mean you can’t try,” Piper said. She was looking at her cell phone and for a moment I thought she might be reading a message from Harlow. But then she looked up. “There is a fight out of Vegas tomorrow morning at six. I suggest you be on it.”

* * * * *

HARLOW

I landed back in California just after seven and took a cab to the apartment. I hadn’t cried but my face was stiff with unshed tears and I felt like someone had punched a gigantic hole through my chest.

When I let myself into our apartment I was relieved to find it empty. Bridget would be doing her shift at The Palace so I’d have the place to myself for another few hours.

At least I could fall apart in privacy.

I dumped my bags on the floor by the front door and headed straight for the wine rack and pulled out a random bottle of red. Not even bothering with a glass, I popped the cork and drank straight from the bottle. The plan wasn’t to get drunk; but if that happened … fuck it. I needed to slow down the tornado of thoughts working its way across my brain.

I took the bottle with me and settled into the wicker egg chair overlooking the beach. It was still light outside but an indigo dusk was settling across the sky. As I took another swig of wine the phone in my jeans pocket vibrated against my hip. Heath’s name lit up the screen. But just like the other ten calls from him, I hit decline and shoved it back in my pocket.

My chest felt hollow. But I was too dazed to cry. The wine would help calm me but I knew it wouldn’t erase the awful mental images I had of Heath and that girl with the bright blue eyes. I didn’t think anything could erase them. Not wine. Not even time.

I exhaled deeply in an attempt to still my thundering heart.

When I had discovered Colton was cheating on me I had just felt mad. Maybe a little let down but more angry than anything. I was also a little insulted that he’d thought I’d never find out. I mean, he was running around with my so-called best friend, Cassandra, so what were the chances I wouldn’t eventually stumble across the truth?

But at the end of the day I’d been able to see it was time to move on from him. Our relationship had run its course and I’d recognized that. I didn’t cry over it. I didn’t even get angry at him. I just broke up with him.

Oh, he had tried to convince me otherwise. He promised to never have anything to do with Cassandra ever again. Which would be easy because Cassandra was moving away. But I had already decided to spend the summer in California and realized I was truly over him. At the end of the day, his cheating on me was my perfect exit strategy.

But with Heath … his cheating on me was a sword straight through my chest. It tore the ground from under me and left me numb.

I tried some deep breathing exercises hoping it would calm the pain I felt swell around my heart. But it didn’t and my urge to cry was palpable. My chin quivered and I inhaled air through gritted teeth to calm the tide of heartache as it pushed and pulled throughout my chest.

I wouldn’t cry. I was afraid that if I started, I wouldn’t stop. So I stared out the window at the beach across the road, watching the sun move lower into the horizon and the shadows grow longer across the sand, and prayed the pain would go away.

Bridget arrived home sometime after eleven. Taking one look at me and the empty bottle of wine at my feet, she curled into the wicker chair next me and waited for me to explain what was wrong.

I chose my words slowly. Although my mind rushed to explain everything to her so she could perhaps come up with the answer to why? Why had this happened?

“Do you want to know what I think?” she asked finally, after I’d explained what had happened.

“Please.”

“I think he made a mistake. He fucked up real bad. But not because he wanted to. I think he overreacted to what he saw. And because of who he is, and how he looks, it’s far easier for him to fuck up so badly. You’ve said before, there is always some girl waiting to have her way with him. Unfortunately, this time it worked against him and it made it easier for him to make a mess of things.” She unfurled her legs from under her and leaned forward. “Heath isn’t a bad guy. I actually like him a lot more than I thought I would. I don’t think he’d ever try to hurt you deliberately.”

“Since when did you become a Heath Dillinger fan?” I asked, surprised that she was sticking up for him.

She smiled wistfully. “Since I saw how happy he made you.” She paused and thought for a moment, taking her time to choose her words carefully. “Watching you two together is crazy beautiful. The way you look at one another. The way he acts around you and the way you light up when he’s around. It’s obvious you’re crazy about each other.”

“I am. I mean, I was.” I frowned. “I’m not sure anymore.”

Her smile was closed-lipped and she looked thoughtful. “I don’t think Heath knew what hit him when you came along. He’s always been a no-strings attached kind of guy. But then you came along and turned his world upside down. Anyone can see he is insanely in love with you.”

“Insane is right.” I frowned.

“I think it scared the hell out of him.”

“What are you saying?”

She hesitated, looking for the right words. “He made a mistake, Harlow. A huge, vile, massive mistake. But maybe – “

My eyes widened and I couldn’t hide my disbelief. “Are you saying I should forgive him?”

“He’s human. He let a stupid chain of events get the better of him. But you,” she paused. “You can make it right again. And you should. Because what you have is too precious to throw away because of a bump in the road.”

“I can’t believe you think I should forgive him. Seriously?”

“I think you should think about what you have before you throw it away,” she replied calmly.

“He already threw it away when he stuck his dick in that thing on the plane,” I protested.

She nodded. “Granted, it was a fucked up thing to do. But you said it yourself; he thought you had gone back to Colton. So he got himself smashed to cope. And we all know why he doesn’t usually drink alcohol; because he does dumbass shit when he’s drunk.” She sighed. “I think he was out of his mind over the thought of you being back with Colton. He wasn’t interested in that girl on the plane. He was just trying to make himself feel better.”

“And that’s his excuse?” I exclaimed feeling a little pissed at my cousin for making excuses for him.

“Not an excuse. A reason, perhaps? Listen, I’m just being your voice of wisdom here. I don’t want you to make a mistake. What you guys have is a once in a lifetime thing.”

I shook my head. “It was a summer fling,” I snapped like an angry child, reaching for my anger because it hurt less when I felt angry. I wasn’t in the mood to feel anything else. And I definitely didn’t want to hear about forgiveness. “Nothing but a stupid summer fling.”

But Bridget wasn’t convinced and dismissed my comment with a little shake of her head.

“You don’t believe that. No-one does.” She sighed and I noticed how weary she looked. It was almost one thirty and we had been talking for more than two hours.

“So I should just forgive him for cheating on me?”

“I’m telling you to look at what you have before you throw it all away. And ask yourself if you can move past this to salvage this incredible love you two created.” She stood up. “Give yourself a couple of days to feel like shit. Then make up your mind. But at least give yourself a bit of time to think about it before making any decisions.”

“I hate him,” I said, even though I knew it wasn’t true. I loved him. But I hated what he had done to us.

To me.

Ugh! To that awful thing on the plane.

“Believe me, if he was here, I’d smack him right between those two charming dimples, for what he did to you,” Bridget said.

“If he was here, I’d let you.”

We were both exhausted and called it a night. Before I turned off my light I did what I had avoided doing all night; I checked my cell phone.

Eighteen missed calls. Sixteen from Heath. And my voice mail was full.

There were also eleven text messages.

Nine from Heath.

One from Piper asking me to call her.

And one from Jesse begging me to call Piper.

I quickly sent Piper a message.

I’m ok. Very tired. Will sleep on everything and wake up with a better perspective. I will call you tomorrow xx

Within minutes she had texted back.

Hope you’re ok. He’s a wreck if it makes you feel better L

It didn’t.

I turned off my phone and bedside lamp before crawling under the covers. As hard as I tried to turn off my brain I couldn’t get the mental image of Heath—my Heath—fucking that girl in a cramped airplane toilet cubicle.

Or the smug look on her face as she stood in front of me, not so subtly letting me know she had devoured my boyfriend the day before.

It took hours before I finally fell into a restless sleep. But it was a night of tossing and turning, and punching my pillow. My head was filled with images of Heath.

And a girl with bright blue eyes.

* * * * *

I woke to the smell of pancakes and forced myself out of bed.

My head was foggy and thumped with a mean headache. My reflection in the bathroom mirror was no better. A restless night had left my eyes puffy and swollen and no amount of makeup was going to help. So I didn’t even try. There was no point.

I splashed water on my face and toweled it off. I didn’t even bother running a brush through my hair. Instead, I left the bathroom in search of coffee. But as I walked into the dining room I stopped cold in my tracks. Bridget was in the kitchen moving pancakes around a fry pan.

And sitting at the dining room table was Heath.

A creaky floorboard gave me away. Heath jumped up from the chair but stopped as if he was suddenly unsure of what to do. At least I wasn’t the only one who looked like crap. He looked like he hadn’t slept at all.

I wrapped my arms around my waist. “What are you doing here?”

Bridget turned off the cooker and set the pancakes aside. “I’m going for a shower. Give you guys some privacy.”

My eyes didn’t leave Heath as she disappeared from the room.

“You shouldn’t be here,” I said.

“I had to see you. I need to know you’re alright.” His voice was hoarse with fatigue.

I shook my head. “I’m not. But then, that’s to be expected.”

I knew I looked like a train wreck. Puffy eyes. Pale skin. I didn’t want him to see me like this. He needed to go.

“I need you to leave.”

His jaw flinched. “We need to talk, Harlow.”

I shook my head. “Not yet, Heath.” I closed my eyes. The idea of hearing the sordid details made me nauseous. “I’m not ready.”

He nodded. “Okay. I understand. But when?”

Again I shook my head. “I don’t know. I need time to process all of this.”

“Time is good,” he said, looking hopeful. “I can give you time. Anything you need. Just please … please tell me you’re not going to give up on me.” His voice broke and he exhaled deeply. His eyes filled with tears.

Seeing him punched a big hole in my chest. I was so in love with him.

Was.

Now I was numb.

“I’m not promising you anything.”

“I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. But I love you so much Harlow. More than I thought I was capable of.” He exhaled deeply. “God, baby I’m going crazy …”

“You need to leave.”

“Please,” he begged. “I know what I did hurt you. But it’s killed me.”

I crossed the room to the front door and opened it. “You can’t be here. Like I said, I need time.”

His face fell, his lashes casting a soft shadow across pale skin. He nodded slowly and crossed the room to leave but paused in the doorway. Pained blue eyes held mine. Dimples flickered either side of his mouth. He hadn’t shaved and he looked rough.

“This is the worst thing I have ever done. And it always will be. I will never do this again. I promise you.”

I saw the agony in his eyes. And across his face. I heard it in his voice. And I believed him. But it didn’t change anything. He had still cheated on me and I didn’t know if I would ever be able to forgive him.

My eyes fell to the floor. “Bye Heath.”

“I’m going to prove to you Harlow that I’m sorry. I’m going to show you how much I love you.”