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Can't Let Go
  • Текст добавлен: 7 октября 2016, 02:43

Текст книги "Can't Let Go"


Автор книги: Michelle Lynn



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Текущая страница: 7 (всего у книги 19 страниц)

FOOTSTEPS POUNDING DOWN the stairs wake me up, and I feel the weight of a heavy arm laying on my shoulders. Squinting up, I discover my body is curled up into Dex’s. My legs scrunched up into his side with both his arms encasing me in his own. With the safest feeling I’ve ever come close to, I’m reluctant to leave the nest of Dex. That is until a shadow appears in the doorway.

My eyes veer toward it, and those blue-glass eyes lock on mine. “Hi,” he says. “Friends, huh?” He cockily quirks his eyebrows at me before walking down the hall.

Slowly and quietly, I inch away from Dex’s strong body. Placing his arm back down so it rests on his leg. I tiptoe out of the room, resembling the pink panther as I walk up the stairs, stopping at every creak, hoping it doesn’t wake him.

“Hi, Chrissy.” Brady’s loud voice startles at the top of the stairs, and I almost lose my footing as my hand covers my heart.

“Hi, Brady,” I whisper. “Dex is asleep on the couch,” I inform him with the hopes he’ll lower his voice.

“Well, I guess he’ll be waking up.” He doesn’t change the tone of his voice. “What are you up to today?” he asks, and I’m a little uncomfortable making chitchat in my clothes from yesterday, with breath from hell, and the perception that maybe something happened with Dex and myself.

“I’m going to try to find a job,” I admit, embarrassed in this crowd, since none of them seem to be hurting for money.

“Good luck. Do you want a ride?”

“No, I’ll walk. I know we aren’t far from Main Street.” I graciously decline.

“Okay, well, I have to head to work. Try The Loft or maybe an office on campus. Not sure exactly what you’re looking for.” He smiles and then descends the stairs. When I don’t hear him wake Dex, I’m grateful. My only goal is to escape this house and find a job, so I can stand on my own again.

I take a shower, dress in my sophisticated outfit—a pair of black slacks and a pink blouse with my black heels. My funeral, wedding, and now job search attire. By the time I get downstairs, I find an empty couch, and I realize Dex must have woken up at some point. Meaning that he’s either in his room or he’s left the house.

Departing the back door, I lock the bottom lock on the door with the key Sadie gave me and pivot around toward the front of the house. There are a few girls outside the house next door, smoking. None of them wave, but inspect me through the corner of their eyes. The disapproving judgment can be felt from across their weed-infested lawn.

My heels click on the sidewalk, and the downtown area of Western comes into view. Marching up to a bar and grill first, I figure my best shot at getting fast money is waitressing. Although, I’m a little worried how much college kids tip.

Bustling all the courage I can muster, I open the doors to a dark and dingy rundown bar. The linoleum floors, fake wooden tables with napkins stuffed under a leg of each one with mismatched chairs tucked alongside them inhabit the center of the room. Booths line the wall, covered in black vinyl with rips and tears. “Welcome to Aces.” An older man with a grey beard and matching head of hair greets me from behind the bar.

“Hi, I was wondering if you were looking for help,” I say, my timid voice trembling a little.

“Sorry, darling, we aren’t.” He circles around and continues to fix a drink for someone, whom I assume is a regular, since the man actually never spoke to order one.

“Okay, thank you anyway,” I say and walk out of the bar, feeling a tad dirtier from when I went in.

Two more places, including a more uppity establishment, all with shakes of their heads before I can even get the words out if they’re hiring. Exhausted, I drop onto a park bench, feelings of being unwanted rise to the surface. Will my life ever turn around? Am I destined to a life of shittiness?

Why am I here in Western? What am I here to accomplish? Why did I ever go back to that crappy town anyway? All my prospects of ever getting out drying up before my eyes. But then all I did was run to someone else to fix my problems. Dex. He can’t save me from my life or make it better somehow. From our conversation last night, he sure as hell isn’t looking for love. Not that I ever thought I was the one to give it to him.

“You’d think you were trying to figure out world peace with the concentrated expression on your face,” a deep voice intones, its owner sitting next to me.

When I look around, dark spiky hair and blue eyes shine at me. “Hi, Rob.”

“Hey,” he answers and then crumbles up a receipt and tosses it into the trashcan next to him. “Have you eaten?” he asks me, standing up before I even answer.

“No, but I’m good.” My low supply of money does not allow me to eat out.

“My treat, come on.” His head jerks to the side in a let’s go motion.

“Thank you, Rob, but I can’t let you do that.” I remain in my seat and cross my legs.

“Don’t act like some independent girl. I’m buying you lunch, not a damn car.” He grabs my hand and yanks me forward. “And I’ll be ordering for you, so you can’t try any of that salad or bread shit,” he continues, dragging me forward.

We enter a small café on the corner right across from the campus, called Lit’s. We’re seated outside at a table for two and a nice view of students coming and going off campus with their bags around their shoulders, conversing with others. I imagine intelligent conversations from lectures their professors embarked on.

“Look at those people wasting their time and money,” Rob remarks, staring out into a lawn filled with college kids that I yearn to be.

“Why do you say that?” I turn my attention to him, wanting to hear his perspective.

“I was one of them for years. I didn’t learn anything except how to chug a beer, smoke pot and get laid.” His face bears no expression, and then he picks up the menu.

“Did you already graduate?” I ask a more personal question, figuring he opened the conversation.

“No. I’m a dropout. I’m just saying, your eyes were all lit up when you looked over there, and I’m here to tell you it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.” The menu rests in front of his face, so I can’t see his expression, but his tone is sourer than someone who truly believes that.

“I’m a never been,” I add, and he drops the menu slightly, his lips turned up.

“So, I actually have a leg up on you,” he jokes, and I kick him under the table. He feigns injured and chuckles, lightening up our lunch conversation.

“What’s your story then?” I ask, and his eyes dart to the street and then down to the menu.

“Not much. Guitarist, dropout. Went on tour with the Beatskulls and Krypto last year, but it was a fucking disaster.”

“Why?” I ask, and then a little brunette bounces over and places two waters on our table.

“Good afternoon. I’m Gretchen, and I’ll be your server.” She says her spiel, and then eyes Rob before throwing me a half-hearted glance.

“Hi, Gretchen. We’ll each have your chicken sandwich with fries and coleslaw.” Rob hands her the menus, and her eyes dart to mine.

“Oh and can I have a Diet Coke?” I stop her right before she leaves.

“Yeah, sure. Would you like anything to drink?” she looks at Rob, and he just shakes his head. “Okay, great. I’ll be right back.” She bounces back through the doors.

“So what were we talking about?” I ask him, and he quickly perks up.

“You and Dex,” he says with a sly smile on his face.

“Um … I’m pretty sure we weren’t.” I relax in my seat.

“Seriously? Friends?” he asks me unbelievingly.

“Yes … friends,” I confirm. “I’ve known him since we were eight.”

“Huh? How come you’ve never been around before?” He maintains the questions.

“Why so worried about it?” My voice a tad more curt than I intended it to be.

“Just curious is all. He’s different when you’re around, so I’m just trying to figure it out,” he admits, and I’m not sure that’s a good or bad thing that Dex is different when I’m around.

“Maybe more like brother-sister then?” I counter, since regardless of anything I do know, there is a level of deep caring we have for one another. Maybe because we’ve known each other for so long, or maybe because he has some hero complex to always save me.

“That would be sick, because from the looks you two share it would be incestuous. Don’t get me wrong, I’m into kinky, but that’s a whole other dimension.” His eyes widen, and he adamantly shakes his head, as though trying to rid the thought.

I laugh, watching his reaction to his own insane thoughts. “What about you? Any girlfriend?” I change the subject because let’s face it, Dex and I can’t occupy too much time, since nothing did, is, or will be happening between us.

“Just the flavor of the night.” I roll my eyes. “Don’t even be like that. Believe me, they’re plenty satisfied in the morning.” He takes a sip out of his water.

“Oh, how nice, you let them spend the night,” I sarcastically say, and he chuckles lightly.

“What can I say, I’m a gentleman,” he jokes back, and I begin to giggle.

Our food arrives, and we eat. Thanking Rob when he pays for the bill, we exit through the side gate and begin to walk back to the house. I’m not sure what everyone hates about Rob. To me, he’s been nothing short of polite and nice. Right as we are about to walk up the driveway, I’m still laughing at some story Rob’s telling me, about when a girl wouldn’t leave his room and the antics he had to pull off, when Dex’s truck turns in, almost running Rob over. Dex climbs out of his truck and glares over at us before retreating up the back steps.

By the time we enter the kitchen, he’s nowhere to be found, and I’m confused why he wouldn’t just say hello.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say your brother might be a tad jealous,” Rob says, leaning in close to my ear. Then he heads down the hallway, laughing to himself.

When I reach the top of the stairs, I glance at Dex’s door and then my own. Debating what is appropriate to do in my head for a few seconds, I decide to reach the bottom of whatever is wrong with him. Meandering the few steps, I knock lightly, but he doesn’t say anything. Then I hear his voice leaving a message for someone.

“Hey, Sam. Give me a call.” His door opens right after and he looks at me. “What’s up?” His voice filled with chills.

“Nothing. What did you do today?” I ask, still in the hallway as he remains in the doorway.

“I went to the gym,” he answers, short and curt.

“Oh, that’s good. I tried to find a job, but no luck. Then I ran into Rob—” I ramble on about my day’s activities due to the sheer uncomfortable vibe he’s putting off.

“That’s nice. Well, not the whole not finding a job. I’ll look out for you, too,” he interrupts me.

“Thanks. I just really want to …” Then I peer down the hall and back to him. “Do you mind if I come in?” I signal with my hand into his room.

He steps out of the way, with a half-hearted invite. Once I intrude into his room, I sit on his unmade bed. “I don’t want to live off of Brady or you.”

“Chrissy, we’ve been over this. It’s fine.” His exasperated annoyance clear in his words and deep release of breath.

“I know that. It’s just I guess I’m trying to tell you why I woke up this morning and snuck off to find a job.” I’m not even sure why I think he cares that he woke up without me there.

“We fell asleep on the couch. It’s not like I fucked you and poured my heart out to you or something,” he says, wheeling around to his dresser.

“Yeah … well … um … I know. It’s just you looked upset when you came home.” I bite my lip, apprehensive to what’s wrong with him.

“I’ve got a lot on my mind, Chrissy. But it’s got nothing to do with waking up this morning to an empty couch.” Dex kicks off his shoes and shrugs off his socks. His frigid tone and uncaring demeanor has me standing up, ready to flee the room.

“Okay, well, I’ll leave you be then.” I begin to depart the room.

“Wait,” Dex instructs, but before I give him my attention, Sadie’s in the doorway.

“Hey, you two. We’re going to the drive-in tonight. Want to join us?” She bounces on her toes in excitement. “Don’t worry, Dex, it’s not a chick flick.” She smirks.

“Eighties flick?” Dex inquires, still no change of inflection in his voice.

“No. It’s a guys’ movie. G.I. Joe or something with that dose of testosterone level,” she confirms, and I take sanctuary in the doorframe with Sadie.

“What about the second?” I softly ask Sadie, and she snickers.

Glancing at a disinterested Dex and back to me. “50 First Dates,” she whispers, and I smile, shaking my head.

“You know I’ll see what the second show is when we turn into the drive, right?” Dex hollers over his shoulder.

“So that means you’re going?” Sadie asks, raising her eyebrows his way.

He sharply turns around and fixes his gaze on me. “Yeah, we’ll go,” he answers for both of us, and I’m not sure if I like the fact he assumes I’ll go. But, a small of part me does like that he considers us a package deal.

“Now, get the hell out of my room so I can shower.” He throws his sweaty shirt at us, and it drops right in front of our feet. While I’m admiring his bare back, Sadie’s smiling over at me. Dex glances over his shoulder, and I jerk my vision to Sadie, who begins giggling uncontrollably.

“Going,” Sadie answers and pulls me out of the doorway, down the hall.

CHRISSY SHUTS MY door, and I berate myself for allowing my anger to show. I wish Sam had answered the phone, because I need to unleash this damn anger somehow and I was really hoping it would be by stroking instead of punching. Then Chrissy knocked on my door, and it confused me further. What the hell is happening to us? Why did I try to clip Rob when I pulled into the driveway? I need to get these feelings in check before something happens that I’ll regret. It’s been a fucking day, and already she’s occupying my mind, just like when I was fourteen.

Getting out of the shower, I shrug on my jeans and a t-shirt, debating if I should cancel this night. Maybe Chrissy is about to get the wrong idea. Hell, maybe I’m getting the wrong idea.

When I walk into the hallway, all those doubts are obliterated when Chrissy emerges out of her room in the shortest shorts I’ve ever seen, showing off one of her best features, long as hell legs.

Turning around upon hearing me shutting my door, a smile creeps across her glossy lips. “Hey, you,” she says and stops at the top of the stairs.

Walking toward her with my eyes seeing nothing but her gorgeous face, I stop right next to her. “Hey, you.” I copy her greeting.

She hesitantly takes the first step down, allowing me a great visual of her ass. “Are we all driving together?” She glances over her shoulder and then abruptly stops. “Dex?” she questions, and my eyes fly up to meet hers. She has a small smirk across her face.

“Sorry.” I apologize for devouring her body with my eyes, but she doesn’t seem to mind too much from the flirtatious smile across her face.

“Do you think we’ll drive together?”

“No way. There’s no way I’m going to be witness to Brady and Sadie spit swapping more than I have to.” I climb down the stairs to keep pace with her. “We’ll go in the truck,” I inform her.

“Sounds good,” she says. “Should we ask Rob?” she asks, enticing an urge to pin her up against the wall to claim her with my mouth. What the hell? I’ve got to stop these feelings of ownership when it comes to her.

“I’m sure he’s busy, but if you want.” I walk past her without regard, a little annoyed that she doesn’t want to just be with me.

Of course, when we enter the kitchen, there’s Rob, sitting at the table reading a manual. Then the guilt that he’s fixing Chrissy’s car and here I am jealous of her admiration to him. I put them in that position, didn’t I?

“Hi, Rob.” I swear Chrissy’s mood increases ten notches. She practically skips over to him, claiming the seat to his right.

“Hey, beautiful,” he greets her, and my footsteps stop for a brief second until Rob eyes me. In order for him not to think he’s getting a rise out of me, I keep moving. “You do know your fuel gauge wasn’t working, right?” He briefly looks at Chrissy before burying his head in the book again.

She giggles and crosses her legs toward him. Why doesn’t she just twirl her hair around her finger? “I know, I would try to keep track of the miles,” she responds.

“Did that always work?” he asks, leaning back in his chair, placing the neck of his beer bottle to his lips.

“Not always,” she giggles, sweeping her hair around the back of her neck to one side.

“I can’t imagine you’d have a hard time finding someone to pick you up, though.” Rob smirks, his eyes flash to mine and then Chrissy again.

She doesn’t respond, but just pushes him lightly on the shoulder, laughing. It’s like I’m in the middle of some first date, and I’m the third wheel. “Do you want to come to the drive-in with us?” she asks, and Rob’s line of sight turns to me. I shrug my shoulders, appearing indifferent, but his eyes laugh at my reaction.

“Nah, I gotta get your car going. Would hate for you to be stuck here,” he tells her, standing up from the table. I scoot over when he places his hand on the fridge and then staring directly at me he continues, “I mean, unless there’s another reason you’re staying.” He fixates on me while reaching in to grab a beer.

“Um … no.” She staggers because we both know she has nowhere to go. “As soon as you fix my car, I’ll be going.” Her voice shakes slightly as she rises to her own feet. That flirtatious side of her disappearing.

“Well then, maybe I should take longer to get it fixed,” Rob slyly comments. “It’s nice having you around, isn’t it, Dex?” He concentrates on me, and I finally catch on to what he’s doing.

“Let’s go, Chrissy,” I blurt out, throwing my empty water bottle in the recycling bin by the back door.

“See you two friends later,” Rob sarcastically kids and pushes his way out the back screen door, retreating back to the garage.

“Bye, Rob. Thank you again.” Chrissy follows him, calling out to him. Rob turns around to face her outside the garage doors.

“It’s no problem.”

Then a sharp pain hits my chest when she places her hand on his forearm, right by that damn guitar tattoo with Jessa’s lips. “Please, let me know how I can repay you,” she says.

“No thanks or repayment needed. I like to do things with my hands and—”

Before he can even finish, I grab Chrissy’s hand, spurring laughter from Rob. “We don’t want to be late to the movies,” I remind her, and she smiles at me, nodding her head.

“See ya, Rob,” I say with a wave of my hand, as I guide Chrissy to my truck.

Thank goodness, Brady and Sadie come out a second later, saying their own goodbyes to Rob before sliding into the Camaro. I insert the keys into the ignition and I hope it is my imagination that Chrissy’s quieter now, not around Rob.

“So, I have some blankets in the back and if I know Brady, he’ll stash some food in too.” I try to pull her into a conversation.

“Sounds awesome. I haven’t been to a drive-in for years. Of course, remember when boys only took girls to drive-ins to make those windows steam up?” She laughs.

“Why did you think I agreed? Are you telling me you’re not down with some heavy making out and a little touch and feel?” I joke with her because I’ve got to lighten the mood up between us.

“Sorry, bud, I don’t give it up on the first date,” she counters back, her own amusement in giggles.

“Technically, our first date was when we were eight. So, I think we’re already in grand slam territory.” I leer her way and cock my eyebrow, inviting a head shake from her.

“Then technically, you’ve never asked me on a date.” She raises her own eyebrows at me.

I don’t respond because what can I say? I should have a long time ago, or how about now? If only our situation was different.

We pull through the gates, and, although Chrissy tries to force money into my hand, I pay for the two of us, earning a huff of annoyance. Brady pulls in, and I back in so we can use the bed of the truck. Once I pull the keys out of the ignition, Chrissy’s out of the cab and climbing in the back.

“Eager?” I ask her, and she laughs.

“Kind of. I know it’s stupid and you probably do it all the time, but I always wanted to be in the bed of a truck at a drive-in,” she admits, and I climb in, laying the blanket down.

“I’ve never been here with the truck, or ever for that matter,” I reveal.

“Oh, well then it’s the first for both of us,” she says, straightening out the blanket and then sitting down cross-legged on it.

“Hey, guys!” Sadie says, following suit and climbing up. She takes her position next to Chrissy and they begin talking about the movies.

“I brought us some food.” Brady places a cooler down and positions himself next to Sadie. Since the sun has yet to fully set, we have a while before the movies will start.

“Great, I’ll be right back,” I tell him, hopping down from the bed of the truck. Pulling my phone out, three missed phone calls are displayed on the screen. Sam, my dad, and then Sam again. Redialing Sam, I wait for her to answer as the gravel crunches on my feet, passing by kids running around and couples snuggled together.

“Hey, sexy. Where have you been?” Sam answers, and her cheery mood is always nice to hear.

“Busy. What’s up with you?” I ask in return.

“Nothing really. I called earlier because I was reading this book and it got me all hot, but since you didn’t answer, my fingers had to do the walking all by their lonesome.” I can practically picture her fake pouting face. Like the time I told her there was no way I could do it again without having to seek medical attention.

“Sorry, but I’m sure they do a fine job,” I joke.

“Yeah, but they’re getting a little too used to you instructing them where to go,” she seductively whines. Silence fills the line because I’m not really into all this right now. For some reason I’m more eager to get back to the truck. “Anyway, Jessa’s almost ready to get that baby out, I’ll be there soon. Can’t wait to see you,” she continues. “I’d have you pick me up at the airport and maybe we could detour somewhere, but I’m flying in with my parents, boo.” She does that childlike voice with a small pout.

“I guess it will have to wait until after then,” I comment.

“Hmm. . .you’re grumpy. Thought you would be wanting to tear my clothes off,” she says, and a little guilt develops with the thought I’ve yet to tell her about Chrissy. Not that Sam and I are exclusive or that anything is going on with Chrissy. But, for some reason, I’m beginning to feel stuck in the middle of them.

“I’m at the drive-in. Gotta go take a piss and then head back before the movie starts,” I inform her, and she huffs slightly.

“Okay, well, have fun. Call me when you can,” she says and then hangs up. I’m relieved she’s so easy going with it all. Not like other psycho chicks I’ve actually dated, but maybe she’s cool because we aren’t dating.

I go into the bathroom, two little squirts are messing around with the paper towels and water. When they see me, they run away with frightened expressions on their faces. Once I’m done, I call my dad, praying he doesn’t need me again tonight.

Two seconds after I hang up from his unanswered call, I get a text message.

Dad: No one knows where he is. I’m calling in some favors.

Fuck, I wish I could have five minutes alone with her dad, because I’ve about had it with his shit. Show him how a real man should behave.

By the time I reach the truck, the laughter of Chrissy and Sadie carries over two car lengths. Although I’m not sure what the commonality between the two are, it’s nice to hear Chrissy so happy. Pushing up on my arms, I jump on the truck bed and take a spot next to Chrissy. Not too close, but not too far away either.

Sadie leans into Brady’s arms, like always, while he interests himself in looking around. The two girls are cracking up about an incident that happened over at Trey’s last week. Something about Drew and potty training, which I should probably know if I’ve been half a friend to Trey. He and Kailey have been so busy, I’ve barely had time to catch up with them. Me not being responsible for as much, I should really make more of an effort.

“You okay?” Chrissy’s hand touches my arm, and my eyes sweep up to her intrigued look.

“Hey … just thinking I need to get over to their house soon,” I remark, and Sadie nods her head.

“We’re all going to lunch tomorrow. Why don’t you go over there and help Trey for a few hours while we steal Kailey?” Sadie suggests, and I nod.

“Maybe,” I say, not committing myself.

Eventually the sun sets and the screen flicks to life. I open up my back window and turn on the radio to the station marked on every post by the designated car spots. Sadie cuddles up to Brady, his arms wrapped tight around her. Chrissy leans against the back of the cab with her legs crossed over one another, while I stay a safe distance away. The fighting is pretty cool in the movie and distracts me from the neck cramp due to having my head turned in the direction of the screen the whole length of the movie.

By the time the intermission comes and before the next movie starts, Sadie and Brady begin scooting down to exit the truck. “Where are you guys going?” I ask, cranking my head side to side to snap the cramp out.

“Sadie’s cold and well …”

“No need for details. Carry on.” I motion with my hand, and Chrissy giggles.

“In case we don’t talk, tomorrow at noon, I’ll drive us over to Jessa’s and we’ll go from there.” Sadie reaches over and hugs Chrissy.

“I can’t wait,” Chrissy exclaims, and I scrunch my forehead at her comment. I’m thinking she’ll never be moving out of the house at this rate. Not that I want her to.

Just as Brady’s opening the door to his Camaro for Sadie, the screen flashes and 50 First Dates begins to play. “What the fuck?” I yell, and Sadie giggles with Chrissy joining in. “You knew?” I ask her, and she bites her lip like a school girl in trouble.

“You know the drive-ins always show two opposite movies.” Chrissy pushes me with her hand on my arm, and I teeter a little to the right.

“You girls lied. Let’s go.” I playfully begin to stand up, but Chrissy grabs my hand and tugs me back down.

“Hey, I sat through a very unrealistic movie with no romance and a lot of violence. At least 50 First Dates is a comedy,” she says, leaning toward me.

“Unrealistic? Every chick flick is unrealistic,” I remark, and she rolls her eyes at me.

“I know you have a soft spot in there somewhere,” she pokes me in the chest, right by my heart. “One day, your heart will grow,” she teases me, and I chuckle.

“I’m not the Grinch, Chrissy. I have a heart. Now scoot over, my neck is killing me.” I wiggle my way next to her and grab my second blanket to wrap around our legs. “You want my sweatshirt?” I hold up my Western sweatshirt to her, and she nods.

“If you aren’t using it, that would be great,” she says with her arms wrapped around her chest, trying to warm herself up.

“Even if I was, it’d be yours,” I say, and she smiles, taking it out of my hands.

She pulls it over her head and rolls up the sleeves. As our arms touch each other, she scoots a little away. It never used to be like that with us, we’d always be okay with affection. I guess as we got older, things changed, and we didn’t want the other to think there was something more to it.

“Aw … you do have a heart,” she sighs, and I knock my shoulder with hers. Instead of moving away, she stays near. Her knee and shoulder rest against mine. It’s cozy and comfortable.

“Only certain people see it. Don’t say anything.” I kid with her, and she places her head on my shoulder, fluttering her eyelids a few times.

“Why, Dex Prescott, you amaze me,” she says, an admiration in her eyes.

“Pay attention to your chick flick.” I point to the screen, and she laughs.

“Looks like we aren’t the only ones not paying attention.” I follow her line of vision to a steamy windowed Camaro.

“I swear those two can’t go five minutes without some form of body contact,” I reply, annoyed. It just makes this whole situation uncomfortable.

“I think it’s cute and romantic. They love each other.” She’s so sweet, and I hope she finds exactly that one day, if that’s what she wants.

“Girls,” I sarcastically joke.

Silence begins to overtake the parking lot. Families and couples have retreated to their cars for the warmth of the confines or each other. The crickets chirp back in the tree lines behind the screen while the moon plays hide and seek in the clouds. Curling up under the blanket, Chrissy’s body nudges into mine and instinctively, I wrap my arm around her shoulders. “Thank you, I’m so cold.” She shivers next to me, and I pull her closer trying to warm her up.

Her lips inch closer to my neck, her hot breath enflaming goose bumps along my neckline. We’ve sat in this position when we were younger, but this is by far more intimate than any other moment we’ve shared. My face leans down closer to hers, and her moist lips graze my five o’clock shadow across my chin. Moving my one hand from the side of her waist up to her shoulders, lingering over her bare neck. I squash the nearly uncontrollable urge to allow my fingers to grab the elastic ponytail holder to free her hair, letting it tumble down to caress her shoulders. Instead, my palm cradles the back of her head and angles her face up to mine. In slow motion, our cheeks rub against one another, until our lips lightly brush against the other’s. I’m about to explore further and put more pressure against her mouth before the sounds of car engines starting loudly brings me back to reality.

My hand releases her head, but her hand lingers on my stomach. Seconds pass by as our eyes focus on one another’s. Confusion to what just happened fills the space between us. I debate in my head, do I kiss her and care less about consequences? But how can I do that to her? Remembering that it’s friendship she needs from me right now and not complications of a relationship, I push back and her hand falls to her lap.

Quickly standing up, I begin packing everything up while she sits there for a few moments as stunned as I am. Then she stands up and begins folding the blankets. She hands them to me and my heartbeat picks up when our fingertips brush during the exchange. Slowly, she gets down from the truck bed, and I follow her, both of us walking to our side.


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