Текст книги "Repentance: The Story of Kace Haywood"

Автор книги: Meghan Quinn

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Текущая страница: 18 (всего у книги 20 страниц)

“They’ll definitely back away.” I laughed.

“See, Mom? Boxing is my second nature. Put me in the ring, and I will do some damage.”

“You won’t be going in a ring,” Linda said protectively.

“Ah, come on. Have you seen my footwork? No one can catch me.”

Visions of Madeline bouncing around me in the Haze Room clouded my brain, making me smile.

“We will consider it when you’re older,” Linda answered.

“Sounds like a plan.” Madeline looked around. “Why am I the only one eating?” She pushed her hair aside, leaving powder in her wake. With a ring of chocolate on her face and powder all over her, she was one adorable hot mess.

“Sorry,” I said, smiling and taking a giant bite. “Beignets are my favorite breakfast.”

“They’re my second,” Madeline said, reaching for another. “I love French toast.”

“So do I,” Jett chimed in. “Bananas Foster French toast is my favorite.”

“That’s good,” Madeline nodded. “But I like peanut butter and Fruity Pebbles on mine. Oh, and marshmallows.”

Both Jett and I looked up at Linda, who was resting her head in her hand. She laughed and said, “Remember, Madeline, that’s our French toast surprise that we keep between us.”

“Oh yeah, well, Mr. Kace and Mr. Jett won’t tell anyone. Right, fellas?”

“Right,” Jett and I said at the same time while chuckling.

We finished up our breakfast while chatting with Madeline about her “summer plans” and listened to her tell us all about the “good values” a movie like Frozen had. She was so entertaining, I could have listened to her talk for a days.

In the middle of her telling us all about her favorite Disney Princess, Mulan, she looked at the clock and screeched. “Mom, I need to get ready for class at Justice.”

I had about half an hour before I had to start teaching. This go around, it was going to be much easier.

“Well go get ready, honey, and I will take you. And please, wash your face,” Linda said.

She took her dishes to the kitchen and went to her room. She tore out of the kitchen and down the hallway to her room. Her door slammed shut and Linda exhaled loudly.

From down the hall, we heard her call out, “Sorry!”

“She is a beautiful little girl, Linda. You’ve done a great job raising her,” Jett complimented.

“Thank you. She can be a handful at times, but I can’t imagine a day without her.” Linda turned to me and said, “Why are you here this morning, Kace?”

I knew the question was on her mind the entire morning, but speaking in front of Madeline would have been inappropriate, so she waited for a time when we were alone. I knew it was coming.

Taking advantage of Madeline’s absence, I sat back in my chair and said, “I wanted to thank you for coming to me last night. I didn’t handle your news well at first. It was all a bit of a shock. I needed to let it soak in, but after I let it soak in and after I gave myself some closure, I wanted to thank you. I’ve been walking around in this world so focused on my past sins that I never realized how you might be fairing. I was convinced I ruined you, convinced that I destroyed any chance of Madeline having a normal life, but I was wrong. You gave me the gift of opening my eyes yesterday, and I have to thank you for that.”

“I have to thank you as well,” Jett cut in. “Kace and I have been friends since grade school, and I know the man he can be. You brought him back, Linda. With your forgiveness, your grace, you brought my best friend back.”

Tears streamed down Linda’s face as she listened to us. You don’t need to thank me,” she replied. “You gave me hope, Kace. You gave me freedom and you protected Madeline in a way I never could have. You’re a blessing to our family, and I hope you will continue to make us a part of your life. Madeline is quite fond of you.”

“I would be honored,” I said, getting up and pulling Linda into another hug. “I’m quite fond of the both of you too.”

Jett was right; justice always prevailed.

Chapter Thirty Two

My present…

“Gahhh! Are you going to propose?” Goldie hopped up and down and clapped her hands together as I washed down the mats in the Haze Room after a long day of forgiveness, acceptance, and of course training Madeline and the other patrons of the community center.

There was one more thing I had to do, and it was going to be the hardest part of all. It was the one thing I was dreading but looking forward to the most, if that made sense.

“No, Goldie, I’m not proposing.”

“Why not?” She crossed her hands over her chest like a child.

“Because life doesn’t work like that.”

“Yes it does,” she countered. “Let’s go pick out a ring.”

“I asked you when Lyla worked, and you have me picking out a fucking ring? Don’t you see where you’re exaggerating here?”

Goldie thought about it for a second and then shook her head. “Nope, I think we’re on the right path.”

“Just tell me when the hell she’s working.”

“God, you’re no fun. All I’m asking is for a little proposal. It’s not like I’m asking for little Lyla and Kace babies, but oh my God, can we talk about how cute they would be? Ahhhh, you guys would make beautiful babies, all mocha skinned and pretty eyed. Hopefully they don’t get your temper though because holy hell, could you imagine five of you running around, moody as fuck?” Goldie used a little person voice and said, “Dada, I shit my pants. Whatcha gonna do about it?”

“There is something seriously wrong with you,” I said while getting up and taking the cleaning supplies back to the cabinet. The Haze Room was good to go. Now I just needed to shower and prepare for tonight. “So when does she work?”

“She’s on stage at nine,” Goldie finally admitted.

“Thank you,” I said while walking to the locker room and grabbing the duffel bag Diego had brought by for me since I had been too busy to stop at home.

“Does this have to do with that other woman who brings her daughter here?” Goldie asked, seeming nervous about my answer. “Is she a love child?”

“Ask your fiancé,” I responded, not in the mood to tell the nosey Goldie everything. Knowing her, she would ask a million questions, and I would never get out of here.

“Ugh, he doesn’t tell me anything when it comes to you.”

“Well, he has permission. Tell him that.”

Goldie chased after me. “Can you text him that? He wouldn’t believe me if I told him.”

“Maybe it’s because you lie too much,” I said, turning to face her.

“I do not! I just embellish things. It makes for a better story.”

“Say it how you want; it’s still lying.”

“Whatever,” she responded defiantly. “Can you just text him for me?”

“Why does it matter that much to you?” I asked, the bag slung over my shoulder.

“Because I’m nosey! I need to know what’s going on in everyone’s lives. Do me a solid and text Jett, then I won’t bother you anymore.”

“That’s a giant fucking lie, and you know it.” I laughed.

Goldie gave me with a questioning look, as if she was confused by the person standing in front of her.

“Umm, I’m sorry, did you just laugh?”

“I’m leaving.” I turned but heard Goldie clapping behind me.

“You laughed. It was all throaty and sexy too. Lyla is a lucky girl.”

“Drop it, Goldie,” I warned but with mirth in my voice.

I spent the next thirty minutes showering and getting dressed. Diego had packed a pair of my worn grey jeans, black chucks, black shirt, and black sock hat. The V-neck of the shirt showed off some of the muscles in my chest and for once in a long time, I actually appreciated the reflection in the mirror. For once, I was proud of the man who stood before me.

I drove over to Kitten’s Castle and parked the car on one of the back streets near the club since cars were blocked off at night from going down Bourbon Street.

Nerves settled in as I walked to Kitten’s Castle. In my head, Lyla would be happy to see me, but after I’d left her this morning without saying goodbye, I could see it being the last straw. There was only one way to find out.

As I approached the club, one of the girls was standing outside the door, calling to men who walked by to come and enjoy the atmosphere of the club. She wasn’t wearing a bra and had kitten-shaped pasties over her nipples. Her garter belt and thong kept her cool in the steamy night air, and her heels had scuffs near the bottom, letting me know the woman was struggling, like every other female working Bourbon Street.

“Hey, coming for a lap dance?” she asked as I approached.

I didn’t answer her as I walked past her through the door and into the darkly lit club. It was just dark enough so you couldn’t see what men were doing under the tables and so you couldn’t see the grime in the place. I kept my hands in my pockets and walked toward the stage, where acts were in the midst of a change. I checked my watch and saw it was nine. Lyla would be on any minute.

Quickly approuching the stage, I looked around before going behind the curtain. Cigarette smoke immediately smacked me in the face. Barely covered women walked around with their hair half done and their false eyelashes hardly attached to their eyelids. Lyla was by far superior to these women in every department.

I looked around for Lyla but didn’t see her. It wasn’t until I heard the crowd cheer that I realized she must have snuck past me. Music ripped through the club, a heavy beat with a sexy undertone.

Lyla was on stage.

I peered past the curtain and saw her, strutting around in a thong and a T-shirt that scantily covered her breasts. The men watching her could no doubt see the underside of her boobs. Rage filled me as men started to slip bills in her thong and cat-called for her to take her shirt off. Lyla grabbed the pole in the center of the stage and dipped low then slowly rose back up, sticking her ass out for everyone to see. That was all it took. She was done.

Tearing across the stage, I gripped her by the arm and started dragging her away.

Shock was her first reaction, followed by anger.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” she hissed.

Two bouncers jumped up on stage and grabbed me by the shoulders. I released Lyla. I elbowed one of them in stomach, making him instantly back down and then elbowed the other in the jaw, sending him backward into the crowd. I grabbed Lyla again and forced her behind the curtain.

“Kace!” she shouted. “Let me go!”

“Nope,” I responded, leading her to the lockers. There were a few ladies in the locker room, and when they saw us enter, they quickly exited, giving us some privacy. Once they were gone, I slammed the door, turned on Lyla, and crossed my arms. “Get your things.”

“Excuse me?” Her nipples were hard and poked the thin T-shirt.

“You heard me. Pack your things, Lyla.”

“The fuck I will. You don’t order me around.”

“Lyla, I will not ask you again. Pack your fucking things, or I will do it for you.”

She didn’t move. She just stood there, tapping her foot. Stubborn fucking woman.

“Fine,” I said. I walked over to her locker, cocked my elbow back, and plowed into the middle of the flimsy medal, sending the lock across the room. I opened the dented door and grabbed her purse, shoving her items inside.

“Hey!” she shouted while she rushed over to me. I tossed her regular-sized shirt and shorts at her, then grabbed the bills from her thong and put them in her purse.

“Get dressed.”

“No. I’m not leaving. You can’t just come in here after last night and be all controlling and try to tell me what to do.”

I got in her face and lifted her chin so she was forced to look in my eyes. With a serious tone in my voice, I said, “You’re not working here anymore. So get your ass dressed, because we’re leaving.”

“No.”

“Lyla,” I warned.

“What are you going to do? Man-handle me out of here?”

I grabbed her around the waist, showing her I wasn’t kidding. “Do not test me.”

“Ugh, you’re infuriating!”

“Lyla, get your ass back on stage,” Marv, the owner of Kitten’s Castle said as he bustled into the locker room, breathing heavily and purple from anger.

“Let go of me,” Lyla threatened.

“Who is this?” Marv asked, poking me in the back.

I turned quickly on the man, towering over him. He backed up and held out his hands defensively.

“Whoa, don’t want to start trouble.”

“Then I suggest you find someone else to cover Lyla’s shift.”

The puny man backed away and practically ran out of the room, closing the door behind him. Even though I was easily able to scare away her manager, the overbearing tactic wasn’t working with Lyla, thanks to her stubbornness, so it looked like I was going to have to open my heart right in the middle of the locker room.

I grabbed her hand, and she tried to pull away, but I laced our fingers together. “Lyla, please come with me. I’m sorry about this morning. I had some things I needed to take care of, but I’m ready to talk and I would rather not do it at Kitten’s Castle.”

“That’s all you had to say, idiot,” she muttered under her breath as she dressed. She slowly took off her stage shirt and walked over to her purse, naked besides her heels and thong, and dug around for her bra. She then grabbed the neckline of my shirt and pulled me closer so I could feel her nipples pebble against the thin cotton of my shirt. My hands instinctively went to her hips. Her lips nipped mine as my hands went under the strap of her thong and molded into her ass.

I groaned when her tongue stroked the seam of my lips, looking for entrance. Kindly I obliged and allowed her to explore my mouth.

Just when I was settling in for a make-out session, she pulled away and then tapped my hard-as-fuck erection. “Just making sure it still worked.” She smiled and put on her bra.

“Teasing will get you nowhere,” I warned.

“Doesn’t seem like you have the right to threaten. Pretty sure I have the upper hand at the moment.”

I hated that she was fucking right about that. “Just get dressed.”

“Don’t get pushy with me, Kace. The more you demand, the longer I will take.”

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” I asked while pulling on the back of my neck.

“Just a little.” She smirked.

Leaning against the wall of the locker room, I watched as she put her clothes on as slowly as possible. I didn’t know what was sexier, watching her put her clothes on or watching her take them off. Both had a deep yearning stirring at the base of my cock.

Once she was ready, she grabbed her purse then grabbed my hand and said, “Let’s go.”

I led her out the back of Kitten’s Castle to the car, where I opened the passenger door for her, trying to remember to be a gentleman. It’d been way too long.

We drove in silence to Woldenberg Park. We should have walked, but luckily, we found a parking spot along a side street.

I walked around to Lyla’s side and helped her out of the car, making sure to grab her hand. I brought her to a bench that overlooked the Mississippi River, grateful there weren’t many people milling about at night. Imitation gas lamps lit the sidewalks, casting a romantic setting for our walk.

The night sky was free of clouds, and looking up, I could faintly see stars. I chose to bring Lyla to the park because I wanted to start a new chapter, and bringing her to my room at Diego’s or going to her apartment to talk to her would just remind me of the life I was once living.

We sat on the bench, facing the river. I put my arms on the back of the bench and she snuggled close. I played with the strands of her hair as we enjoyed the cooler night air.

I knew she was waiting on me to talk, but I had no clue where to start. I’d never told anyone my story, ever, so to try to talk about it was going to be one of the hardest tasks I ever had to face.  Her head rested on my shoulder and she caressed my thigh, letting me know she would wait for me, that she was patient. I kissed the side of her head. “I need to talk to you.”

“I gathered that,” she said with a slight laugh.

“Yeah, I’m not good at talking about things.”

“I gathered that as well.” She kissed my jaw. “I’m a good listener though, so take your time.”

Taking a deep breath, I leaned into her for support as I tried to get through my story. “You know about my boxing career.”

“I do. I wish I could have seen you box. I can only imagine how hot you looked.”

Chuckling, I said, “Yes, it was the hotness factor that made me so good.”

“I’m sure it was, but go on.”

“Jono was my trainer, he ruined my career—stole it from me, actually, by slipping me steroids without my knowledge.”

“Yes, I read about that. He’s been convicted since then though for doing it to other athletes. You’re not the only one. You could get your name…”

“That doesn’t matter now.” I kissed the side of her head and said, “But thank you for caring. That night I found out that I was banned from the circuit, I hit rock bottom. I went to a bar where I knew no one would bother me and drank my sorrows away. Jett was with me. He watched me take drink after drink, convincing me to take action, to fight back, but at that point there was no fight left in me. The one thing I had worked for my entire life for was stolen from me, so I gave up. It was over.”

“I’m so sorry,” Lyla said, kissing my jaw again.

I shut my eyes tightly and tried to even out my pulse that began to quicken. This was much harder than I thought.

Clearing my throat, I said, “There was a guy there that night. He found out who I was and took it upon himself to provoke me. He started physically attacking me.”

“What do you mean? Like he tried to pick a fight?”

“Yes.”

“Was he an idiot? Didn’t he know who he was against?”

“He did, but he also thought I was some puss bag who used steroids to get to where I was. He never considered the fact that I was actually good at my sport.”

“What did he do?”

“He continued to attack me. At first I welcomed the pain, but then he pushed me past my limit and I struck back with four punches. I can see it so vividly now as if it just happened. A punch to the stomach, a right uppercut, then a left jab and right jab to his temples.”

“Oh my god.” Lyla covered her mouth. I could feel her tense underneath me and panic started to ensue me. I couldn’t lose her over this, but I knew if I didn’t tell her, if I kept this secret, I would lose her for sure.

My throat closed, my eyes burned, and I could feel myself shake with nerves, terrified that with my next spoken words she would get up and walk away.

“I…I killed him, Lyla. In a matter of seconds, I killed a man and watched him bleed out underneath me.”

“No.” She shook her head as she pulled away, my gut clenching from her distance.

“I’m sorry,” I said, tears running down my face. “I didn’t mean to. I lost control. Jett covered it up, and that’s when I gave everything up, moved in with Jett, and started working at the Lafayette Club, building it from the ground up with him. I spent my days either getting drunk, reminding myself of the monster I was, or training the girls. I drank until I was numb, I fucked to temporarily forget, and I swore to myself to take care of the ones whose lives I destroyed.”

“The person you were buying a present for…,” she stated, connecting the dots.

“Yeah, Madeline. She’s the man’s daughter, and Linda was his wife.”

“Wait, Linda and Madeline, aren’t they the mother-daughter duo at Justice?” I nodded my head as she tried to grasp everything I was telling her. She scooted away again, and a little piece of me broke in half.

“Lyla, please don’t distance yourself. I can’t…” I rubbed my eyes and said, “I need you to understand me.”

She bent her knee and placed it on the bench so she was fully facing me now. She grabbed my hand with both of hers and scooted in closer so she was only inches away.

“Then keep talking, Kace.”

I nodded and said, “Every Christmas and every birthday, I would drop off a present to Madeline since she wouldn’t be getting one from her father. I thought it was only fitting to give her something. I also would leave money for them every month in their mailbox. I wanted to make sure they were taken care of. I was so convinced they were struggling, that I had ruined their lives.”

“That night after our date, when we went back to your place and you told me about your father, I freaked out because all I could see was you as the grown-up version of Madeline. That she was going to have to have a tough life like you. I lost it. I should have comforted you, but instead, I ran because your story hit too close to home.”

“I didn’t have anyone, Kace. Madeline at least had her mother.”

“I know that now,” I replied. “This whole time, I haven’t allowed myself to have feelings for people, to live a normal life, because I didn’t think I deserved one. Up until yesterday, I was ready to let go, to finally slip into a dark place, to end my fucking misery…”

“No,” Lyla said, crawling onto my lap and grabbing my head in her hands. “Don’t say things like that.” Her eyes welled up with tears and her lips kissed away the trail of tears on my cheeks.

“I had nothing left in me, Lyla. I was at a point where the pain was too excruciating. Having to teach Madeline how to box on a daily basis, watching her in person, her fiery spirit, it was debilitating. From a distance I could deal with my remorse, but up close, I could barely function.”

“What changed your mind?” she asked, gripping me tightly.

“Linda did,” I answered honestly. “She knew it was me.”

“She knew you killed her husband?”

“Yes.”

“How?” Lyla asked, confused.

“She saw me at the funeral and dropping off gifts, and she put two and two together. When she saw me at Justice and the pain I was living with, she knew for sure.”

“And she confronted you?” Lyla questioned.

“No, she came to thank me.”

“For killing her husband?”

“For ending her misery,” I corrected. “He abused her on a daily basis, he terrified her, and that night I killed him, he went after Madeline. Linda wanted to thank me, to tell me how grateful she was for protecting them, for saving them…”

“Oh, Kace.” Lyla pulled me into a hug, and I buried my head in her hair, getting lost in her cherry scent.

“I didn’t ruin them, Lyla. I saved them.”

“You did, baby,” Lyla said, pulling me closer and kissing my neck. “You’re a good man, Kace.”

Relief spread through me. A final weight was lifted off my shoulders, and I relaxed into her embrace.

“You believe me?” I asked.

“Of course I do, Kace. You’re a good man and I know you wouldn’t lie to me. I told you, there is nothing you could say that would push me away. I knew from the moment I met you, there was something special between us. You were meant for me, Kace, faults and all.”

I slowly looked up into her green eyes and grasped the nape of her neck. I pulled her forward and placed my forehead on hers.

“I’ve fallen in love with you, Lyla. Somewhere along this journey, I allowed myself to feel for you, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get you out of my mind. Every day, I fell harder and harder until it was impossible for me to forget your soft lips and your beautiful heart. You were made for me, babe, and I will be damned if you get away.”

Lyla kissed my lips softly and said, “I’ve fallen for you too, Kace. I’ve fallen hard.”

“I just had to let go of my demons before I could commit to you because what I want with you is something I never thought I could have, but now I can. I want to start fresh. I want us to live together. I want us to work together. I don’t want you leaving my sight. I’m so fucking gone when it comes to you, Lyla. I want everything with you.”

“I want the same, Kace. I love you.”

“I love you, babe.”

Smiling, she pulled my lips to hers and kissed me senseless. My hands fell to her hips as I let her take control of our connection. We were both needy and desperate for each other. It had been a long road to get to where I was now, but I wouldn’t give up the journey for anything.

Like the song “Blackbird” by The Beatles, I’d taken my broken wings and waited to fly. I’d waited for my time to rise. With broken and bandaged wings, I was ready to fucking soar. The blackbird was now free.

I’d finally paid my repentance.