Текст книги "Calling Me Back "
Автор книги: Louise Bay
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Текущая страница: 6 (всего у книги 7 страниц)
“Are you nervous?” he asked as we stepped inside my bedroom.
“A little,” I replied, breathlessly.
He swept a hand down my back then pulled me toward him. “Me too,” he said. I’d never known Luke to be nervous about anything. Could he be nervous about being with me?
Our bodies were pressed against each other. I reached for the buttons of his shirt, methodically undoing the first, the second. I steadied my breathing then tackled the third. I trailed my finger down his exposed skin, eliciting a sharp intake of breath. I loved that I could do that to him.
He trailed his fingers round my neck and pushed the shoulders of my dress off. The fabric was loose, and as I put my arms to my sides, it just slipped off my body and pooled at my feet. I watched Luke, his eyes growing wider as they flitted across my body. He looked away and took a breath.
“You’re so beautiful. I don’t know where to start.” He brushed my cheek with his knuckle. I finished unbuttoning his shirt. He was straining through his pants. I was desperate to get to what was next. Before I started on his zipper, I palmed him through the tight fabric and he groaned, his hands going to my shoulders.
“Jesus, Ash. I . . .” He moved me toward the bed and pushed me gently back. “Lie down. I want to taste you while I get a grip on myself.”
I lay back on the bed, lifting my bottom to allow him to remove my underwear. He knelt by the bed and held my thighs wide. There was no room for self-consciousness. He knew me better than anyone in my life other than Haven. Him seeing me like this felt totally right.
His tongue seemed to know my body even better than his mind did, and as it circled my clitoris, I was lost. I arched off the bed, and Luke slid his hands under my ass and pulled me toward him, intensifying the pressure, the pleasure. I cried out his name, a prayer; I had no idea. I had lost control over my mind, body and heart.
Luke
Watching her body shudder with the aftershocks of the orgasm I’d just given her made me feel like a fucking god. She was so perfect. Perfect for me. I’d been an idiot, not seeing it all these years. I think I’d always known, but there had been some kind of invisible barrier keeping me away.
I stood over her, as she recovered from her first orgasm of the evening. I couldn’t wait to get her to the next one. I quickly undressed, my hard-on verging on painful, soothed only by the thought of being inside her.
“Fuck,” I said, suddenly remembering I didn’t have any condoms.
Ash snapped her head up to look at me.
“I didn’t bring any condoms. Do you have any?” I asked.
She shook her head. I collapsed on my back on the bed. This couldn’t be happening. It was a promise I’d made to myself when I was seventeen that I would never have sex without protection. It was one of the last pieces of advice my father had given me before he’d died. He’d told me that I needed to do everything I could to prevent my girlfriend from getting pregnant—or worse. It was good advice that I’d followed with no exceptions. Not even with Emma.
We lay next to each other. Would not using anything with Ash be the wrong thing to do? If Ash got pregnant, how would I react? Panic didn’t sweep over me like it did when Emma talked about marriage and children, but maybe it was lust keeping those feelings at bay.
“I’ve never . . .” she said. “I’m on the pill.”
It was all the encouragement I needed. “I’ve never, not once. Not with anyone. I’m safe. Are you sure?”
She smiled and nodded. I moved my body over hers and bent to kiss her, slowly, patiently, my tongue exploring her mouth. Her hands gripped my ass and her nails sank into my flesh.
“Jesus, I need to be inside you.”
She opened her legs in response, inviting me in. I positioned myself at her entrance, desperate to feel her around me, but at the same time I wanted this delicious torture to go on forever. She thrust her hips forward.
“Patience,” I teased her.
“Oh, I think I’ve been patient long enough,” she said.
I sank into her slowly, inch by inch, reveling in the sensation of heat between us. I had to still when I got as deep as I could go. I needed to empty my head of the reality of what was between us, what was happening. If I didn’t, this would be over too quickly, and I never wanted this to be over.
I started to move out of her slowly, watching her, wanting to see what she was feeling by looking at her beautiful face. Her mouth formed a perfect “O” as I dragged my flesh against hers.
“Ash,” I whispered.
“You feel so good,” she replied.
I responded by slamming back into her. I couldn’t stop myself. My body had overtaken my head. I needed to fuck her.
Small noises I’d never heard her make before slipped from her lips. The Ash underneath me was someone I’d never known before. I pushed my face into her neck and licked, wanting to taste the sheen developing on her skin. It was like nectar, and I bit down wanting more of it. She clenched around me, and I groaned as I dragged myself out of her. I was so hard, so close, so ready, but I wanted her there again, with me this time. I didn’t know how her body worked yet. I didn’t know what her turn-ons were. I grinned at the thought that I would be learning all of them very soon.
Without breaking our contact, I leaned back on my knees, lifting her ass to rest on my thighs. I ran my hands down her body, pinching one nipple, then the other, interrupting the movement of her breasts as they shifted in time with my thrusts. I wouldn’t be able to hold myself back for long. My palm smoothed across her taut stomach, then lower until my thumb found her clitoris. She moaned as she flung her hands over her head, grabbing at the pillows behind her.
“Is that what you like?” I asked. “You like me to rub you while I’m fucking you?”
Her breaths were short and tight, and our eyes locked together as her mouth opened a fraction wider, giving me my answer.
“More, please God, more,” she said breathlessly.
“I want you to come for me,” I said as I increased my pace.
“Please, more,” she replied. She looked so fucking beautiful—undone, open, mine.
I thrust harder and faster, gritting my teeth, trying to stop myself from falling before her. Then she was there; her back arched and she shuddered. And all the while her eyes were fixed on mine. I emptied myself into her, coming so strongly I thought I might pass out—a combination of the exertion and the ecstasy.
I collapsed on top of her and then moved to the side, pulling her closer. She was precious, like an abandoned treasure I’d finally found. I never wanted to let her go. I was still panting as I pressed my lips to her temple. “You’re amazing.”
We lay there, our breathing returning to normal, until Ash tried to move out of my arms. I pulled her closer.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” she said.
“Don’t be long,” I said, not wanting to lose contact with her for a second. I would have followed her if she wouldn’t think I was a total lunatic. “Water?” I asked and she nodded.
I came back to the bedroom from the kitchen with two glasses of water at the same time Ash returned wearing a t-shirt.
“What are you wearing?” I asked.
“A Wonder Woman costume. What does it look like I’m wearing?” She sounded as if she thought I was crazy.
“We can try that tomorrow. In fact, I insist we try that tomorrow,” I replied and she rolled her eyes. “I mean, why do you have clothes on? I want you naked in my arms.”
She looked at me coyly, and I reached for the hem of her shirt. She didn’t resist as she lifted her arms so I could strip it off. “And underwear?” I asked, incredulous. “Off,” I said.
She giggled and kicked off her panties and crawled under the sheets, and I followed. I pulled her to me, and she lay in the crook of my arm, her head resting on my shoulder. She smoothed her hand down my chest, and I felt myself harden again. Jesus, I was like a teenager.
“Do you feel weird?” she asked. I felt anything but weird.
“No.”
“But it’s us, Luke. We’re friends.”
“We’re best friends, and no, I don’t feel weird. I feel stupid for not making a move on you sooner. What about you?” I asked.
She trailed her fingers over my chest, then lower where she found me hard and ready for her again. She circled my cock with her fist, dragging it up with the perfect amount of pressure.
“I don’t think you feel weird,” I whispered. “Tell me what you’re feeling. Tell me what you want me to do to you.”
She looked up at me, heat simmering in her eyes. “I want you to fuck me from behind. Hard.”
I groaned at her words and rolled her onto her back, dipping my lips to hers. “Such a dirty mouth,” I whispered between kisses.
I held myself above her. “Turn over.” She twisted so she was lying on her stomach. I put my knees on either side of her and swept her hair from her neck. “Put your arms out and don’t move,” I said. She did as I asked, surrendering to me. I wasn’t done kissing her. My mouth found her neck and then wandered across her shoulder blades. I licked down her spine to the small of her back. Her skin was so smooth, so perfect. My tongue trailed lower to the dimples just above her ass, and I smoothed my hands over her buttocks. Her ass was rounded and soft. I pulled her cheeks apart, and she squirmed beneath me and tried to look back at what I was doing.
“What—”
“Shhh. Lay back down.” I blew across the exposed skin and she groaned. “Has anyone had you here?” I asked.
“No,” she whimpered.
I tightened at the thought of being the first to claim her ass. Not today, but soon. I needed to be inside her quickly. I pulled back. “Get on all fours,” I said and she scrambled to her knees. Her nipples had beaded and her breathing was shallow and quick—she was ready for me.
Without warning, I plunged into her.
“Luke!” Her hands gripped the sheets as her head dropped, and I thrust in again.
“You like this? You like it hard, baby?” I reached for her shoulders and clamped my hands over them, ensuring that I went deep every time I pushed into her.
“Yes, just like that.” Her voice was bumpy and weak, as though her energy was somewhere else.
She was so tight, and I got so deep it was perfect. I picked up the pace, trying not to concentrate on the noises she was making. The sounds coming from her made me feel as though there was no one who could do this to her. It made me feel powerful, as if I owned her.
She clenched hard, milking my cock. “Jesus. Fucking. Christ,” I shouted as her arms collapsed from under her as she gave in to her climax. As soon as I knew she was there, I let go, losing all sense of what I was doing.
I collapsed on top of her, feeling as if I’d run a marathon. My hands found hers, and I interlaced our fingers, wanting to stay as connected to her as I could.
Ashleigh
Sleep must have claimed us at some point because I woke up in the crook of Luke’s arm to his gentle snoring. I glanced at the clock. We’d been up most of the night. I snuck to the bathroom, and as I got back into bed, he reached for me in his sleep. Did he know who he was reaching for? Did he think I was Emma? My gut churned at the thought, and I avoided his arms.
He turned toward me and opened his eyes. “Ash, come here.”
I smiled, both at him wanting me close and at my silly assumption. He knew it was me. I got back into bed and let myself be enveloped in his arms.
“I’m going to need to get in the shower in a minute,” I said. Spooning, I couldn’t see his face.
“Sounds like a great idea,” he said. “And then we can come back to bed.”
“No.” I giggled. “I need to go and get Mrs. Malcolm her shopping.” Mrs. Malcolm lived on the ground floor, and although she still managed to get around, she found it difficult to carry groceries.
“Are you still doing that?” he asked.
“Yeah, a few of us take it in turns.”
“Why do you have to be such a good person? I want you to stay in bed with me all day.”
I laughed. “You can help and then when we’re done we can . . . do other stuff.” Was he going to stay with me the whole day? Were we a thing now?
“Other stuff is my favorite kind of stuff.”
I playfully kicked his shin behind me. “You sound dirty.”
“I feel dirty. I’m naked—you’re naked. I’ve got a hard-on the size of the Great Wall of China.”
“You wish,” I teased.
“I don’t actually. I think a hard-on that size would be fucking inconvenient.” Luke’s tone was serious, as though he was properly considering the practicalities of having a dick that big.
“You’re a total geek.”
“Speaking of, we also need to find you a Wonder Woman costume.”
“No, we really don’t. And don’t you have plans today?” I asked, surprised that he seemed to be planning to spend the day with me.
“Are you trying to get rid of me? Because if you are, it’s not happening. I’m not leaving you on your own to freak out. Do you think I’m crazy? I’m going to be here when you have your meltdown. I’ll pour you wine and feed you chocolate, and then we’ll have sex and it will all be fine.” He grinned at me as if he knew that I wanted to punch him.
“I’m sorry, what was all that? What meltdown?”
“The meltdown you’re overdue to have about us and this,” he said, his hands circling my body.
I pushed against his chest, trying to create some distance between us, irritated with how sure he was about himself—and how right he might be about me. He just pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head.
“You wanna talk about it?” he asked.
“No.” Yes.
“You’re a crappy liar.”
I sighed. “It’s all happened so fast,” I said.
“Not really. I didn’t properly realize until last night, but I think it’s always been there between us.”
“From my side,” I corrected him.
“No, not from just your side. From mine too. Except you were young, and I knew that when it happened, it would really happen and I’d be done for. I wasn’t ready.”
“And that’s another thing. You and Emma. I mean, you only just split. I don’t want to be your rebound girl.”
“Cue meltdown,” he said, chuckling.
I kicked him in the shin and he just clamped my legs between his.
“Emma and I have been done a long time. I should have told her sooner. I’m just not good with change—you know that. And I loved her, I really did, in my way. But not enough. There was something missing between us.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. I hated him being upset. Whether or not it was with me, I wanted him to be happy.
“Don’t be. Whatever happened led us here, and I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be.”
“Luke,” I said, moved by what he’d said.
“Do I need to be worried about being your rebound guy after Richard?” he asked.
“No, he was the guy I dated to get over you.”
“Really?” he asked.
I realized what I’d said, and my cheeks flushed with embarrassment. “Maybe a little.”
“Did it work?”
I raised an eyebrow at him. “Apparently not.”
He squeezed me closer, and I relaxed into him.
“So, shower, Mrs. Malcolm’s shopping, Wonder Woman costume, back here?” he asked. “Do you want to have dinner out, or shall we stay in?”
“Maybe I had plans tonight. It is Saturday night,” I said.
“Do you? If you do, that’s fine. I can go back to Haven’s, but don’t tell me you have plans if you don’t. Now we’re more than, whatever we were, don’t be the one to start playing games. If we’re going to make this work, we need to take the best of our history and make it better.”
He was right. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. I want to know what you want. If you want me here, I’m here. If you don’t, I’m gone.”
I clutched at him. The idea of him being gone was awful. “I want you here. Always. I’m just—I thought I was allowed a meltdown?”
“You totally are, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to call you on it. So, we’re going to try this? I want to explore this with you, Ashleigh. Do you feel the same?”
How could he think that I could possibly say no to him? I looked up at him and nodded. “Yes.”
He trailed his tongue across the seam of my lips. “Good answer.”
I couldn’t tell exactly what time it was, but from where I was lying on my back in my bed, I could suddenly see the line between the wall and ceiling more clearly than before, so the sun must have started to come up, bringing with it Sunday morning. Of course, Luke wasn’t watching the shapes in my bedroom come into focus. He was asleep, collapsed on his front. Being a heavy sleeper, he had barely moved for the five or so hours I’d been lying here awake, staring up at nothing.
There was a reason why people said that things always felt different in the morning. Most of the time, it was said to give comfort. For me, it felt anything but comfortable. My overdue meltdown had finally started to take hold.
It was Sunday and the bubble for two that we had occupied since Friday night was about to pop, and we were going to have to let the real world in. We were going to have to face Haven, and the reality of what we’d put at risk covered me like a cloud.
I felt stupid for thinking this could be easy. Luke had broken up with Emma a nanosecond ago. He wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be making decisions about a potential new relationship. He didn’t like change, and perhaps reaching for me had just been a way of giving himself comfort. He couldn’t have been seeing things clearly.
I covered my face with my hands. What had I been thinking? Haven, if forced to choose, would always pick her brother, and then I would lose not just my love, but my family. My stomach churned. How could I have been so reckless to put so much at risk?
This was going to be so hard; it was almost impossible that something between us could do anything but fail. But now that I’d tasted the promise of something, it was worse than if I’d never known what was possible. Luke’s feelings for me weren’t fifteen years old. This wouldn’t break him as it could me.
I wasn’t sure I could be with him.
But I wasn’t sure I could ever get over him.
Read more of Luke and Ashleigh in Calling Me Away.
I Can’t Make You Love Me – Bonnie Raitt
If You Ever Want To Be In Love – James Bay
Landslide – Dixie Chicks
Say You Love Me – Jessie Ware
To Make Her Love Me – Rascal Flatts
If I Knew Then – Lady Antebellum
You Are Everything – Diana Ross
Let’s Wait Awhile – Janet Jackson
Here I Am – Leona Lewis
Knocks Me Off My Feet – Stevie Wonder
Where My Heart Belongs – Gloriana
Come Rain Or Come Shine – Ray Charles
I’m so thankful to you for reading about Luke and Ashleigh’s story. It’s difficult to explain what a gorgeous lift to my day it is when I get a message from someone telling me how they enjoyed one of my books. Every single interaction on social media and my website means the world to me.
I still have to pinch myself every now and then that people are actually buying and reading my books. It’s a lesson to us all that some of our best dreams are the ones we don’t plan. I heard Condoleezza Rice say how important it is in life to leave room for serendipity. I’ve never been good at doing that but dear readers, I’m learning and you’ve all proved to me that it’s worth it –thank you.
To all the bloggers, supporters, champions and cheerleaders that I’m lucky to have in my world – thank you. I love the way you’re all on a crusade of positivity. We need more of it in the world.
In a sense it feels wrong to single people out to thank because the smallest like, share, retweet means so much, but I can’t leave the stage without just a few others standing to take a bow.
Elizabeth—I really don’t have the words to thank you. You’ve taught me how to write (and induced various meltdowns about my writing) and I will be forever grateful. Thank you for being brutal. Here’s to being dangerous.
Karen Booth, I just love you more the more I know you. You are so kind and generous and lovely and I’m lucky to have found you.
Jessica Hawkins, you are a rock star and a dear friend. Thank you for all your support and for lending me the wonderful Elizabeth.
Lauren Blakely—thank you for all your generosity and support. I love your spirit.
Jules Rapley Collins and Megan Fields. What can I say? You pair are the girls that keep my spirits lifted and make me laugh with your outrageous confessions. Thank you for letting me share your worlds. Thank you for ALL your support and encouragement.
Thanks to Jacquie Jax Denison, Lucy May, Lauren Hutton, Kingston Westmoreland, Lauren Luman, Mimi Perez Sanchez, Ashton Williams Shone, Tina Haynes Marshall, Susan Ann Whitaker, Sally-Ann Cole and Vicky Marsh. You are so good to me!
Twirly, thank you brain twin for inspiring the line “I’ve lost my funny.” I hope I find it again at some point. PS Juno’s “the business” because she’s her mother’s daughter.