Текст книги "Uncovering Desire"
Автор книги: Kacey Shea
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Текущая страница: 15 (всего у книги 16 страниц)
GOD, I HOPE THIS WORKS. I’ve spent the last week giving her time. And getting my shit in order. Because if there is one thing I know to be true, it’s that actions speak louder than any words. And I’m not great with words. So, if there’s a chance for Kate and me together, I’m gonna have to prove it. I just pray it’s enough.
I hope she gets home soon. Relaxing against the wood of her apartment door, I sink to the ground and sit. This place is not safe. I know she likes the apartment, but I passed three homeless guys and several shady looking characters on my way up, and that was only between the parking garage and the door.
They’re all at Melissa’s for their monthly girls’ night in. I glance at my phone, it’s just after nine. I don’t know how late they’ll go, but I’ll wait as long as it takes. Maybe she won’t come home afterward? I shake my head and banish the insecurities that beg to steal my confidence. No. She’ll come home. And she’s not the kind of girl to bring home random guys. This I know now.
I twist the small package in my hand, wrapped in brown paper and twine. A smile plays at my lips. This is important. Kate is important. As if my thoughts have psychic powers, a ding sounds across the hallway. The doors part and I stand as Kate rushes off the car. A man with a ball cap pulled low over his face steps out and follows behind a few paces.
She isn’t looking up but her steps seem rushed. She glances over her shoulder at the man behind and breaks into a jog.
“Kate!” I call and her gaze snaps to mine. She sprints the distance between us and hurls herself into my arms.
“Jon! Thank God!” Her voice is laced with fear and I wrap my arms around her trembling body. The ding of the door catches my attention; the man with the hat disappears behind the closing doors.
“Kate, are you okay? Was that man following you?” I hold back the urge to chase after him. Kate’s shaking against me.
“Oh, my god!” Her eyes are wild as she loosens her hold. “That man… I was so scared… What if he—?” Her eyelids squeeze shut and her body shudders. I rub my hands up and down her arms. “Jon, if you hadn’t been here waiting for me I think he would have tried to follow me into my apartment.”
“But he didn’t and I’m here.” Yeah, I want to kill the cocksucker. But Kate needs me, and losing my cool won’t help matters. She nods and pulls her keys from her bag.
“You’re right.” I follow her inside without bothering to wait for an invite. I have things to say and quite frankly, I don’t think she wants to be alone after what happened. She tosses her bag onto a small table and turns to meet my gaze.
“Why are you here, Jon?”
“I was waiting for you, Kate.” She rolls her eyes with a grin.
“Yeah, I figured that part out.” I clear my throat.
“Can we talk?”
“Sure.” She leads me to the sofa. Her place is small and there aren’t many seating options. We sit side by side and I twist to meet her gaze.
“I brought you something.” I hand over the small brown package. A soft smile plays at her lips as she turns it over in her hands.
“What is it?” Her eyes are bright with excitement. I chuckle.
“Open it and find out.” She carefully pulls at the string and unfolds the paper to reveal the bird charm necklace.
“Jon, it’s beautiful,” she says on a breath. I take the chain from her and she pulls her hair from her neck as she turns around.
“It’s a swallow. The Romans believed swallows to be a totem to grieving mothers. It was said they carried the souls of the unborn children.” I connect the clasp and Kate turns back to face me. Her hand goes to the charm resting on her chest. Her eyes fill with unshed tears and she smiles.
“That’s beautiful, Jon.” I nod and reach out to take her other hand in my own.
“I thought so. When I found this I thought maybe you could wear it, to remember how much you love your child, and even though you never held your baby, that you’re a good mother.”
Kate nods, and a smile fills her face. A few tears fall from her glistening eyes and I wipe them away with my thumb. I take a deep breath.
“I saw a counselor today.” Her brows rise.
“You did? How was it?” Her voice is cautious, hopeful.
“Oh, it sucked ass.” I laugh and run my fingers over my scalp.
“Oh.” Her eyes study her nail polish.
“But I’m going back next week.” I grip her hands with my own and hold her gaze. “I’m going back every week until they beg me to stop. Because you were right. This is bigger than me and I don’t know how to deal with Will’s death. And I can’t put that on you or anyone else.
“And you’re worth it. I want to be a man who deserves your love. Your trust. Your pain. I want all of it.” Kate leans in and I dip my head. I cover her lips with my own and savor the taste of her mouth. Her tongue searches to play and I moan at the sensation.
Hands around her waist, I pull her close, but she has a better solution and straddles my waist with her legs. I run my hands up and down her thighs. Each time I inch closer to the sexy as fuck panties I’m sure to find. She bites my lip and I groan, pulling her center closer to me. She gasps.
Damn it. This isn’t why I came here. I grip her shoulders and push back so there are several inches between us. Her breaths are ragged, mine the same, as though we’ve just run sprints rather than made out.
“Kate.” I take another jagged breath. She cuts me off, pulls away further and attempts to climb off my lap.
“I’m sorry, I thought—” I hold her legs and pull her back close.
“Kate, let me finish. And stay here.” She stops pulling away and gazes up from under her lashes. “I just want to clarify something before we take things further. I want you. But not for one night. I want you for an indefinite number of nights. I want you to be my official and exclusive.” Her big eyes study mine. She doesn’t say a word. The silence stretches. I clear my throat.
“So, what do you think about that?”
“You scare me.”
“Kate—”
“No, let me say what I need to say. Jonathan Beltran you scare the shit out of me. Because I’ve never wanted to be someone’s one and only. Not since Kevin. I’ve never wanted more than a night or two of fun. And you—” She blows out a deep breath and runs her fingers through her long locks. “You make me want more. And even though I’m scared, I want to try. This. Us. Jon, will you be my boyfriend?”
“Hey, that’s my line. I’m supposed to ask you that question.”
“You want me to be your boyfriend? Because I’m a woman, so that’s impossible, and I’m surprised you swing that way—”
I grip the back of her head and slam my lips to hers. “Kate, shut up.”
“Okay.” She giggles, but soon her laughter turns to panting as my lips make their way to the valley between her breasts. I pull her shirt and bra down to suck one pert nipple into my mouth. My cock is rock hard. She rocks her hips against my erection and I groan. I release her nipple.
I use my fingers to find her center. She’s soaked. Hands tugging, clothes thrown aside, licking, sucking, nipping. I’m moving too fast but I can’t help myself. Kate rides my hand and I circle my finger around her clit.
“Oh, God yes! I’m so close.” I reach in my back pocket and pull out the condom I stashed there. Kate helps me unzip my jeans and pull them down my thighs. I finish kicking them off and stroke the latex down my shaft. She lifts and slides down my cock in one fluid movement. I shut my eyes. Fuck.
“I’m not gonna last,” I bite out between kisses. Her hips move in a tantalizing rhythm. My hands grip her ass. “It’s been too long.” I spread the fingers of my right hand wide and slide them so I can reach her center with my thumb. I can tell she’s close, and within seconds she’s screaming my name. I swallow her cries with my mouth and pump into her three times before I’m coming deep inside.
I’ve never felt so satisfied as I do in this moment. With Kate in my arms, my cock still pulsing inside her, a wave of bliss seeps to my core. “I love you.” I murmur against her mouth. I can feel her smile.
“I love you too, Jon.” She sits back on her hips and I catch the playful glint in her eyes. I trace my hands up her back and down her legs in lazy strokes. She flips the charm on her necklace between her thumb and index finger.
“I’m surprised this didn’t come with Skittles.” She raises a brow. I sit up off the couch cushion.
“You want Skittles? I’ll go get some right now.” She laughs and pushes me back down to the couch. She stands. I love that she’s so comfortable in her skin, completely naked before me. She’s so damn beautiful, and she’s mine.
“Well, I do like to taste the rainbow…” I growl, and she screams as I push off the couch and haul her back into my arms. My lips overpower her giggles.
“The only rainbow you’ll be tasting is me.”
“So caveman,” she teases. I hold her as I walk us towards the bathroom.
“Careful… I’ll hit you over the head and drag you back to my cave.”
She kisses me again, biting at my lower lip, and I groan. “No need. I’ll go willingly.” She breathes out the words, holding my face in her hands. Pride, love, and peace fill my heart. I kiss her with all that I feel. When our mouths part I can’t stop the giant grin that pulls my lips.
“Damn right.” She giggles as I carry her through her small bathroom door.
“Hey, put me down, Army.”
“Not yet.” I adjust my grip to free one arm. I reach into the shower and turn the knob.
“Are we showering together?” Her eyes light with joy and I can’t understand how I’m so lucky. “We end up together in showers an awful lot.”
“Yeah, but those times weren’t any fun. I promise to make this one good. From now on we’re taking lots of showers together.”
“Oh, I like the sound of that.” She grins and I reach inside to make sure the temperature is right. The warm stream of water feels good. Kate wrapped around me, even better. My cock stirs to life. I kiss her and she moans into my mouth. She pulls away, unwrapping her legs to stand before me.
“Maybe showers can be our thing, you know. Every couple has a thing.” I laugh and shake my head as she reaches to a shelf near my shoulder and fills her hand with body wash.
“What?” I croak. She grins as she works her hands over my chest and abdomen. Biting back a groan, I reach for the soap and coat my own hands to move across her skin.
“Like Evie and Tate have food. And Melissa and Drew have sex in public bathrooms…” That halts my hands. I raise my brows.
“They do?” She giggles. I resume kneading her shoulders.
“Yeah. Pretty kinky, right? Totally not what you’d expect from them.”
“Totally.” My fingers skim to Kate’s breasts and I lightly pinch each hard nipple.
“Mmmm… So, maybe showers can be our thing.” She grips my hard length in her hands and drops to her knees.
Best. Shower. Ever.
“I can’t believe I’m doing this.” I grumble under my breath. Kate’s posing her model for the evening, our server from a few nights ago. His arms, chest, and back are bare and covered in Asian themed tattoos.
“What was that, Army?” Kate grins over her shoulder. She goes back to clicking away with her camera.
“Nothing.”
“You know you don’t have to be here.” The fuck I don’t. What she doesn’t realize is that I’m never leaving her to do one of her nude photo shoots alone. Not because I don’t trust her. Because I do. However, I don’t know or trust any of the models she finds. Therefore, she gets intimidating boyfriend bouncer. I almost feel sorry for the models. Almost.
“I want to be here,” I grumble, and earn a little laugh from my girlfriend. I do though. And she’s fucking brilliant with her art. It’s edgy and pushes boundaries, but she’s professional in the way she presents herself. I respect her so much, and I don’t want her to stop taking photos like this. I’m so damn proud of her.
“Okay, Ramon. That’s a wrap.” She starts packing up and Ramon dresses. I help her gather the heavier items, like the portable lighting.
“Thanks again, Ramon. I got some great shots tonight. I’ll email you a few as soon as I get them edited.”
“Thanks, Kate. Awesome to work with ya. Nice to meet ya, Jon.”
“You too.” I nod. “You ready, babe?” She grins.
“Yep. All packed up. Thanks for being my assistant tonight.” She giggles as I take the bag and pull her to my side.
“The things I do for you.” I shake my head and then lean down to claim a kiss. We make our way out of the industrial park and toward my truck.
“You love it!” She smirks and rolls her eyes. I smack her ass and she yelps in surprise. “Last one to the truck buys dinner!” She takes off in a sprint and I shake my head. With all the equipment she knows I won’t chase her.
I pile everything in the back seat before I climb in. She’s messing with my radio controls.
“Kate,” I warn, but she just laughs and settles on some top forty crap. She sings along at the top of her lungs. Good thing I love her.
“Can we just do takeout and go home?” She sighs between songs.
“Whatever you want. You okay?”
She smiles. “Just tired. Besides, I can’t wait to get home. My roommate is kind of a rock star in the bedroom, if you know what I mean.” She winks and I give in to the smile that pulls at my lips.
“Oh yeah? Do I know him?”
“Yeah. You might think he’s a bit of an asshole at first, but don’t be too quick to judge. He’s got a heart of gold. Plus, he’s hung.” She laughs at her own bizarre antics.
“Sounds like a cool dude.”
“Eh. He’s okay.”
“I’ll remember that later.”
Kate moved back in the day after we officially got together. Evie willingly moved in with Tate once they were engaged, which left the apartment’s master bedroom open. It seems fast, and people have their doubts about us, but frankly I don’t give damn. Kate’s it for me, and she was happy to move in. We cleared out my old room to use as an office for the business.
Kate insisted she keep her old apartment in case we break up, so she uses that for studio space. I’m sure some guys would take that as an insult, but it doesn’t worry me. I realize she’s scared. The newness of our relationship, after being let down by so many people over the years—if keeping her own space is what she needs to feel safe, that’s fine. With time I’ll prove to her that I’m not going anywhere, and I’m never letting her down. She’s my girl, my person, my forever partner in life.
“NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT.”
“Come on, Jon, it’ll be fun.” I pout. “You wanted an in with the case and my idea is perfect.” I got home thirty minutes ago; he’s working a new PI case and wanted to brainstorm. I think my solution is brilliant. Methinks the boyfriend does not concur.
“Damn it Kate, I said no! You’re not going undercover as a drag queen. I’m putting my foot down.” Jon crosses his arms over his chest. He looks damn fine, biceps flexing, his handsome face scowling.
“Oh? Foot down. Is that when you stomp your little foot up and down? Do a jig? I just don’t see the problem.” Hands on hips, I stand off against him in the living room. It’s an outstanding suggestion. He’s probably jealous he didn’t think of it first. He pins me with a hard glare.
“Nothing about me is little and you know it,” he growls.
“Oh, my god! Enough, you two! Jeez!” Evie walks out of the office, shaking her head.
“What did you think, now that we’re madly in love we’d stop disagreeing?” I raise my brow.
“If anyone’s mad that’s you, babe,” Jon grumbles and flops down onto the couch.
“Yes! That’s exactly what I thought!” Evie’s eyes bug and she’s still shaking her head. I don’t think she gets us, but she’s been supportive of our budding romance all the same.
“Oh, sorry to disappoint. He still drives me crazy.” A grin fills my face. Jon stretches his long legs onto the coffee table and pulls out his phone.
“Yeah, and she’s frustrating as hell, but if you stick around long enough you’ll witness some great make up sex.” Evie pinches her eyes shut.
“Oh, no. I don’t want to see that.”
I laugh. “Oh, but it’s hot as fuck! The things this man does—”
“Lalalalala! I’m going, I’m going!” I walk over and wrap her in an embrace, and pull her hands from where they cover her ears.
“’Bye, Evie. Call me tomorrow.” I squeeze tighter and she does the same before she turns towards the door.
“’Bye, QT.” Jon calls from the couch.
“Goodnight. Try not to kill each other!” She laughs on her way out.
“Death by sex, now that’s a good way to go!” I wink as I close the door. I lock it behind my best friend. Jon’s deep voice sends shivers down my back.
“So, about that hot make up sex you promised?” I fight the urge to grin. I school my features and turn back to the living room, hand on hip, and strut for full effect. Jon licks his lips and I know he’s remembering all our previous make up sessions. If there’s one thing that comes natural to us, it’s sex. I’ve never been with someone who’s made me feel so much, so fast. Our intimacy is intense and mind blowing.
“Maybe I’m not done fighting with you?” I quip. “Let’s talk about something that gets you really worked up. Mismatched socks? My driving skills? Hmm…” My lips purse into a pout and I touch the corner with one index finger. He offers a bored smirk.
“Maybe the model I picked for my next shoot?” I tip my head to the side and flash a grin.
“Kate,” he growls a warning.
“How about the bachelorette party I’m already planning for Evie? I’m thinking girls’ trip to Vegas.” Yep, that’s the icing on the cake. Jon lunges from the couch and I turn to run down the hallway but it’s no use. He catches me before I even reach the hall.
“Jon!” I scream as he picks me up and tosses me over his shoulder. I can’t contain the shit eating grin that fills my face and the laughter that falls from my lips. He smacks my ass and stomps to the bedroom. I laugh harder.
He drops me on the bed. I lay back against the cool sheets. Jon covers my body with his strong form and captures my waiting lips with his own. He steals my laughter and I melt into his kiss.
This man—all hard muscle, rough and sexy exterior, with an altruistic heart—loves me as much as I love him. He’s more than I ever dared dream. We’ve both been through so much, but by some miracle we found our way together. You can blame it on spilt beer, or pussy, or even a simple bag of Skittles. It’s not been easy, but we found forgiveness in each other, with the other—and what we uncovered is something beautiful.
The End
Continue reading for an exclusive look into Uncovering Hope, Carly’s story, coming early 2016.
“OH MY GAWD! DID YOU see Dr. FineAss making rounds this morning?” Jenny giggles from where she sits atop the counter. She’s swirling a plastic spoon through her cup of yogurt, legs swinging haphazardly.
I’m done for the day, having worked a night shift. I stretch my arms up and stifle a yawn. Jenny and I have been friends since we graduated nursing school and landed our first RN jobs here at Children’s nine years ago. She always fills me in on the latest hospital gossip. We don’t usually work together, but our shifts often overlap.
“I’m sure that’s not his name.” I grin. My uneaten snacks are still in the breakroom fridge so I pull them out and stuff them in my large purse. My phone doesn’t show any messages or missed calls and a little sigh of relief escapes. Years have passed, yet I still anticipate bad news. I try not to. It’s a bad habit I’m working to break. My brother and his fiancée take excellent care when my boys aren’t at school.
“If you’re not sure who I’m talking about, then you haven’t seen him. I’m serious, Carly. The doc has mojo. He’s only been here a few weeks and has half the floor walking around with lady boners.” Giggling, she hops down and wraps me in a bear hug.
She’s outrageous, but I chuckle along. “I’m out. I’ve got to get a few hours of sleep before the boys get home. And then I have my brother’s engagement party tonight.” Jenny nods and tosses her empty container into the trash.
“I’ll walk with you to the elevator.” She pulls the door open and lowers her voice as I walk through. “So did you have Mama Bear or Greta the Grouch as supervisor last night?”
I glance around for listening ears before I answer. “Grouch.” I shake my head and shove my hands inside my scrubs. “She’s a real you know what, and apparently I’m on her shit list.” I don’t even want to think about it. The soft, cool comforter of my bed is calling me. With the blackout shades drawn, I’ll be passed out in minutes. It’s almost cruel punishment that I still have a thirty minute commute to battle.
“Oh, you don’t have to tell me, girlfriend. Sammie said she’s been after everyone lately. I hear she’s going through a bad divorce, but that doesn’t give her an excuse to be a bitch.” I cringe a little and Jenny gasps. “Oh, gawd. I’m sorry, Carly, I didn’t mean it that way. And I wasn’t even talking about you.”
I muster a smile, “Yeah, I know, Jen. No worries.” I wave as we pass the nurses’ station. Three of my co-workers sit at the desks, huddled together, and likely trading conspiracy theories. In our pediatric oncology unit we are close, a family away from our families, and everyone knows everything about everyone. And if they don’t, they speculate, make up stories.
“Carly!” Heather calls out. I turn back to find a phone cradled between her head and her shoulder as she waves me over. “You’ve got a call, hun.” Strange. I pull my cell out to check once more. No missed calls. I wonder who it is.
“I better get that.” I smile at Jen. She pulls me in for a quick hug.
“We’ll catch up later. I should get to work, anyway. Love you, girl!” Jenny walks away and I head back to the nurses’ station. Heather hands me the phone and I lean over the desk to rest the speaker over my ear.
“Carly Reynolds speaking.” The line crackles and I push the phone tighter against my head. Silence stretches. I try once more. “This is Carly speaking. How can I help you?”
“Hello.” The familiar gravel baritone sends chills down my spine and I drop the phone; the plastic shell clatters to the desk. My heart hammers in my chest and I struggle for breath. The room spins.
“Carly. Carly, hun, you okay? You’re white as a ghost.” Heather rushes around the desk and grips my arm. She pulls me to sit in an empty chair. I resist the urge to throw up. “Breathe. Just take deep breaths. Is everything okay? The boys aren’t hurt, are they?” My boys. I shoot to my feet. I need to get to Eli and Ezra.
“Sorry. I’ve got to go. Heather, if anyone calls here for me again do not give them any information, okay?” She nods. A worried frown fills her face.
“You know I wouldn’t, hun. You sure you’re good to drive?”
“I’m fine.” I’m not, though. I turn and race down the hallway, thankful it’s still early enough not to be crowded full of visitors. Pushing out a side exit, I shove the door with all my force, only it doesn’t fully open. A pained grunt sounds instead. A man dressed in scrubs pulls the door the rest of the way open. One hand covers his face. I don’t recognize him, but a great many people work in this hospital.
“Shit, you really got me there.” His eyes blink rapidly, and though I can’t see all his features, his ice blue stare pulls my attention.
“Oh my goodness, I’m sorry. I’m in a rush and I didn’t see you. Are you hurt?” It’s then I notice the blood start to drip from his hands. “Oh, crap. I think you’re bleeding.”
“You think? You sure you made it through med school with those deduction skills?” He jokes and pulls his hand from his face. Even though blood trickles down his frowning face, he’s very handsome. And young. And with a full head of hair. This must be Hottie Doc, or whatever they call him.
“Well, I didn’t go to med school, so there’s that.” I pull several clean tissues from my bag and place them firmly over his nostrils. “I did graduate nursing school, so you’re in good hands.”
He moves to hold the tissues in place and our hands brush in the exchange. His eyes widen and goosebumps run down my arms at the contact. I instinctively pull away. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to go.”
I brush past him, careful not to touch again. My hands tingle from where he grazed them and I chastise myself for getting caught up with a stranger at a time like this. I need to get to the boys’ school. See them with my own eyes. Touch them. Only then will I have any chance of getting sleep. I unlock my trusty Camry, tossing my bag in first before sliding in. The cool crisp October morning signals the best Arizona weather is just around the corner.
I take care at each turn and light, refusing to give thought to the earlier phone call lest I get in an accident. My body is tight, muscles taut, and I have to remind myself to inhale.
The boys’ school comes into view and I pull up to the red painted curb and throw my car into park. I don’t give a damn that it’s illegal. I run to the door and press the button to be buzzed inside.
“ID and name, please,” the scratchy voice calls from the speaker. I flip open my wallet, slide the license from its clear plastic holder, and lift it to the tiny camera. “Carly Reynolds, for Ezra and Eli.” The seconds tick by like hours until finally there is a loud click from the door. I reach out and pull it wide.
“Mrs. Reynolds, what can I do for you? Are you here to volunteer in one of the classrooms?” The receptionist smiles.
“No. Actually, I’m here to hug them.”
“Hug them? Mrs. Reynolds, surely you realize we can’t pull children out of class for that sort of thing. It disrupts their morning.” She pins me with a patronizing stare.
“Yes, I do. But I don’t care. They’re my children and I need to see them immediately. I also need to speak with the principal before I leave.”
“Well, Mrs. Bell is in a meeting. I’ll have to get back to you to arrange a time in her schedule.” She pulls the phone to her ear and calls each of the boys’ teachers, then requests my sons come to the office. When she replaces the receiver in its cradle I step to the edge of her desk.
“I will not leave until I speak with Mrs. Bell. I’ll sit here all damn day if I have to.” My patience is thin. I’m sleep deprived, and the mama bear inside has been woken from her den. No curly haired, middle-aged secretary will stand in the way of protecting my cubs.
“Are you threatening me, Mrs. Reynolds?” She gasps and rolls her chair away. My boys come into view and I drop to my knees.
“Mama!” they squeal and I open my arms, catching their hugs. I squeeze my eyes shut as tears threaten. I refuse to cry in front of them. My entire being settles. A feeling of peace consumes the worries from before. They’re safe.
I open my eyes and meet the accusing gaze of Ms. Gatekeeper. “No.” I murmur. “Not a threat. A promise.”
