Текст книги "Elixir"

Автор книги: Jennifer L. Armentrout

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Текущая страница: 3 (всего у книги 5 страниц)

“I’m not hurting you.” I opened my eyes, weary.

“You’re killing me!” She tried to rise up, but fell back. The damn girl was going to hurt herself.

“Dear gods, Alex, can you stop fighting me for a damn second?” She opened her mouth, but I placed my other hand over her lips. “Don’t say something smartass. You have no idea what kind of shitty night I’ve had.”

Her eyes narrowed.

“I mean it. Not one smartass comment.”

She grew very still, and I removed my hand. The tip of her tongue darted out, wetting her lips. I could tell she had something entirely infuriating to say but was holding back.

“I need you to try again, Alex. Block him. Cut the cord, and I’ll help you through it this time. I swear. I’ll get you through it.”

Alex stared at me for so long that I feared she’d lost the ability to speak. “You don’t get it. I don’t want to. I need him, Aiden. Not you. A half and a pure can’t love each other. Just let me go.”

Someone must have punched a hole right through my chest. The pain was that real—just as real as the pain I’d witnessed moments ago.

Aiden, please make it stop.

I focused on that instead of what she’d said. Alex was in pain when she fought him, and who knew if there were periods of times when she was fighting him and we just didn’t see. All I did know was that when she’d been herself—her realself—she’d asked me to make it stop, begged me. And there was only one way I could make it stop.

I knew right then, as much as it tore me apart, there was no other choice.

Leaning down, I placed a kiss against her damp temple and closed my eyes. A second—only a second—passed, and I soaked up her warmth and the moment of closeness without her fighting me. Then she jerked her head to the side and said something too horrible to really even acknowledge. Lifting myself off her, I rose to my feet and backed off, leaving the cell.

Alex remained on the mattress, not bothering to rush the door as I locked it. I stood there, watching her, knowing that what I was about to do had nothing to do with my duty to humanity or to my own kind. It really didn’t have anything to do with Apollo and his warnings.

Aiden, please make it stop.

There was only one way I could make it stop.

CHAPTER 5

THE NEXT MORNING, APOLLO, MARCUS, AND I STOOD IN the small sunroom that overflowed with plants and flowers. The sweet tangy scent reminded me of Alex. Hell, everything reminded me of Alex.

She was right about one thing last night. I was obsessed.

Apollo cut to the chase. “Have you agreed?”

I glanced at Marcus, knowing that he’d finally made up his mind sometime last night. So had I. Weary and bone-tired, I scrubbed my hand over my rough cheek. Man, I needed to shave.

“Aiden,” Marcus said.

Exhaling roughly, my eyes narrowed. They didn’t know that Alex had snapped out of it for a few seconds last night. The tiny glimpse of her was something I held close to my heart, but in the harsh glare of the sunlight, I wasn’t sure if it had really happened, or if it had been wishful thinking.

I cleared my suddenly dry throat. The words were hard to get my tongue to form. “Give her the Elixir.”

And that was it—all it took.

What sounded like a series of champagne corks shattered the silence. The air was sucked out of the room as I spun toward the crackling sound. A shimmery blue dust formed in the rays of sunlight. Each particle shined like a sapphire. They came together quickly, as if drawn to become whole. Within seconds, a woman stood before us.

Swathed in blue silk robes that clung to her curves, the goddess tipped her golden head back. Long, thick curls fell to her waist as she drifted toward Apollo with a twitch in her hips.

Marcus sucked in a breath, obviously affected by the goddess’ beauty, and I felt nothing but chilled numbness as we both bowed.

There was something seriously wrong with me.

Or perhaps I was just too focused on what she held in her delicate-looking hands—an ancient-looking porcelain pitcher engraved with a hateful symbol. A circle with a slash through it—the mark of servitude.

“Ananke,” Apollo said, bowing before the older goddess.

My brows shot up. That was quick. It was eerie seeing how in-the-know the gods could be when they wanted. Immediately I disliked her, but I forced my expression blank.

She handed Apollo the pitcher and then turned toward me, her lip tipping up at one corner before facing Apollo again. “You will only need to use a… shot of this. You will need to finish with the compulsion.”

Hands clenching, I started to turn but stopped. I’d heard the compulsion time and time again over the years. Already it was flowing through my thoughts. My stomach rolled.

The goddess moved away from Apollo, returning to the center of the room. “It will take a few minutes to take effect. It will shut down all of her Apollyon powers, therefore breaking the bond. She will be… different.”

Not liking the sound of this, I asked, “What do you mean by ‘different’?”

Her lip tipped up again. “She will be more pliable to deal with—compliant in nature. The… girl will know who she is on the most basic level, but no more.”

“What?” I glanced at Apollo. “I didn’t agree to that.”

Apollo shot me a look that said shut the hell upand then some. Taking in a deep breath, I clasped my hands behind my back. “I apologize.”

The goddess arched a brow and nodded. “I have added Ma-Huang, which affects the memory. Her memories link her to the First. Without them, he simply does not exist. It is not perfect, but the best we can do given the situation.”

A chill crept up my spine. If Seth didn’t exist, then neither did anyone she cared about or trusted. Neither did I.

“She will tire easily,” Ananke continued. “And will be very easy to handle while we search for a more permanent fix.”

The permanent fix was in the room—Apollo—but thankfully the bulk of the gods didn’t know that he could take her out.

“How long will it last?” Apollo asked.

Ananke shook her head. “There is no telling. Maybe a few days if you’re lucky, but you will know when it’s wearing off. She will grow restless, may start to remember things. When this happens, she will need a new dose.”

“Will this harm her in any way?” Concern colored Marcus’ voice.

“No.” She started to shimmer out, but her voice still carried with its cold indifference. “But I would not give her more than six doses. The effects may become permanent at that point.”

And then she was gone, leaving all of us open-mouthed. Marcus exhaled loudly. “Nice of her to throw that in.”

“It could become permanent?” I raised a brow, daring Apollo to look away. “Did you know this?”

His eyes narrowed. “I know the same amount as you do. At least we know not to exceed six doses. If it lasts at least four days, then that gives us nearly a month.”

“If it lasts four days each time,” I pointed out.

Apollo glanced down at the pitcher. “Well, we’re about to find out.”

I went down the stairs, detached as I could be. Knowing what I was about to take part in darkened my soul. Something like that might sound dramatic, and before, I really didn’t think it was possible, but now I understood.

“It’s for the best,” Apollo said.

Glaring at him, I slid past him and stopped in front of the cell. Alex was sitting on the mattress, back against the wall and knees tucked close to her chest. She stared behind me, to where I knew Apollo waited in the shadows. For some reason, Alex reacted like a crazed hydra when Apollo went near her.

“Did you finally come to your senses and decide to let me out?” A smirk twisted her once beautiful lips. They were now chapped from lack of water. The bottle sat untouched by the wall.

I unlocked the door. “You know the answer to that.”

Alex rose to her feet, swaying as she stepped off the mattress. Her face was as pale as the walls surrounding her. “I should’ve known none of you would be smart enough.”

We slipped into the cell, locking it behind us. I watched Alex wearily. She was growing weaker by the day, but the girl was a fighter to her core. Marcus moved back, letting me deal with her as we’d planned.

It seemed fitting that I’d be the one who did this.

Her eerie amber gaze slid past me to what Marcus held in his hands. The liquid inside the glass was deep blue and thick. Recognition flared, and she took a step back. I moved to her side, holding my breath.

As expected, she went wild.

Shooting forward, I wrapped my arms around her, clamping her arms to her sides. Using my weight, I brought her to the floor as carefully as I could, but she thrashed and struggled. From behind her, I got my legs around her waist and locked them down over hers.

Alex was trapped.

“No! No!” she screamed over and over, each word a punch straight to my heart. “No! No!”

Pressing my cheek against hers, I forced her head back. “I’m sorry, Alex, I’m so sorry.”

“You can’t do this to me!” She tried to wiggle her head down but failed. Her voice was laced with hatred and power, an edge that didn’t belong to her. “You’ll regret this. All of you, it will be the last thing you do. I promise you.”

“Do it,” I urged, wanting this over with. Over Marcus’ shoulder, my eyes met Apollo’s. He stood just outside the cell now. Even the god looked disgusted with what we were doing.

With a pained expression, Marcus crouched in front of us and grabbed Alex’s chin. His hand shook as he lifted the glass of Elixir, and he squared his shoulders. “Sorry, Alexandria. It’ll be over in seconds.”

Like a switch being thrown, the voice that came out of the trembling girl was one I recognized and feared. “Please don’t do this,” she begged. Seconds later, my cheeks were wet from her tears. “Please, Marcus, please don’t do this to me.”

Marcus hesitated. “Alex?”

Her body shuddered against mine. “I’ll behave. I promise. I’ll do whatever you ask, but please don’t give me the Elixir.”

I drew in a shallow breath. “What color are her eyes?”

“Gold,” he grunted.

Moving both of her slender wrists to one hand, I knocked Marcus’ hand away and grasped her chin. “It’s not her, not really. Do it. Gods dammit, just do it!”

Alex wailed, and a part of me turned cold—forever. I forced her mouth open, bruising her jaw as her struggles renewed. Energy hummed through me, shocking me every couple of seconds. Marcus tipped the glass to her lips, and the sickeningly sweet aroma of the Elixir filled the cell.

Even after the contents of the glass were gone, Alex still fought. Screaming, rolling her hips, throwing her head back and forth until I felt her breaths turning deeper, slower.

Marcus moved back, setting the glass aside. He wiped his hands along his pants as if he could somehow wipe away what he’d just done to his niece, but it had left a mark on my soul.

I’d never be able to wipe it away, no matter how hard I tried.

I watched Marcus and Apollo as her muscles loosened and her body relaxed against mine. Her head fell back against my shoulder and to the side as she drew in a deep, long breath that sounded like a sigh.

Gazing down at her, I saw the marks again. Intricate designs bled through her skin, swirling over her cheeks and down her neck. Inked in blue, they brightened until the whole room was awash in sapphire, and then they faded out. Alex stilled.

“You have to finish this,” Apollo said.

One of these days I was going to hit Apollo again. I probably wouldn’t survive, but it was going to happen. Turning Alex in my arms, I cradled her against my chest and cupped her cheek. “Alexandria, open your eyes.”

Her lashes fluttered against her pale cheeks, and then finally, they lifted. I sucked in a sharp breath. Her eyes were shattered—dull brown with gold shredded through them. The connection had been broken, but it wasn’t Alex staring back at me blankly. It wasn’t Seth either.

She was a stranger—a young, scared girl who didn’t recognize me, an empty slate perfect for compulsion.

I clamped down on the anger rising in my throat and kept my eyes locked with hers. “To óνομά σας είναι Alexandria.”

Your name is Alexandria.

She blinked slowly.

Pain sliced through my chest. “To óνομά μου εέναι Aiden…” I choked as the back of my throat burned. Wetness gathered in my eyes, clouding Alex’s face. I can’t do this. I have to do this. The words burst out of me. “To óνομά μου είναι Aiden και είμαι ο Δάσκαλóς σας.”

My name is Aiden, and I am your Master.

“Θα υπακούσει μου κάθε επιθυμία, την επιθυμία,. και την εντολή σε θάνατο.”

You will obey my every wish, desire, and command to death.

Or until the Elixir wore off.

She breathed in the words, relaxed a little more, and became them. And I watched the shattered eyes dull even more. I let go of her hands and they fell to her lap.

“What is your name?” I asked, voice hoarse.

“Alexandria,” she repeated in a soft voice I’d never heard Alex use in real life.

“And who am I?”

“Aiden.” She smiled, and I flinched. “You are my Master.”

CHAPTER 6

THE FIRST THING WE DID WAS TO GET HER TO EAT, BUT it wasn’t a simple process. I took Alex upstairs and sat her at the table. The entire time she kept her eyes glued to her hands, which were folded in her lap.

Alex didn’t speak unless she was directly spoken to, and even then, she didn’t raise her eyes. I set a plate of cold cuts and a bowl of fruit in front of her, along with a can of grape soda—her favorite.

She didn’t move.

I glanced at Marcus, who remained by the door, making sure no one entered. Apollo had disappeared the instant I’d brought her out of the cell. Bastard. “You have to be hungry, Alex. You haven’t eaten a thing in days.”

“My name is Alexandria,” came the soft whisper.

I blinked several times and then pushed the plate toward her. “Aren’t you hungry, Alexandria?”

“Am I?”

It clicked then. Like most indentured half-bloods, they had to be ordered—ordered to do everything. Sitting back, I dragged my fingers through my hair. “Please eat, Alexandria.”

Her lashes lifted. Those strange eyes met mine for a brief second, and then went to the plate of food. She was slow to eat at first, but once she grew comfortable—or confident in what she was doing—she finished the plate and most of the bowl. Two cans of soda later, she tugged at a limp lock of hair.

Marcus shook his head and turned, leaving us. Did he regret all those times that he’d wished Alex was more amenable? Funny thing was, even when I’d demanded that she not do something in the past, I’d secretly loved that she rarely listened.

I stood, surprised when she automatically came to her feet. “I’ll show you to your room and you can shower if you want.” I bit the inside of my cheek as her lashes swept down. Try this again. “You will clean up and then rest.”

“Okay.” She looked up, her eyes drifting over my face. “I…”

“What?” I stepped forward.

Alex moved back behind the chair as if it were some kind of shield. She shook her head. I gave her a few moments to speak again, but she’d gone mute. I wanted to reach out and touch her, comfort her, but I had a feeling it would upset her.

I led her to the bedroom I’d been staying in. A smaller room was linked with mine through a shared bathroom. Placing her in that room would enable me to keep an eye on her.

At least that’s what I told myself as I showed her the shower and placed two towels and a robe on the bathroom sink. It had nothing to do with the fact I just wanted her close to me.

Yeah, I wasn’t kidding anyone.

At first I thought I was going to have to undress her, and dear gods, there was no way I could do that and not, well, think and feel the things I would. Then she grabbed the hem of her sweater and started to lift. I had to force myself from the bathroom. SaintDelphi my ass.

Shutting the door behind me, I leaned against it and closed my eyes. The water turned on, and I pushed off, crossing the room and sitting down on the edge of the bed. Weariness seeped into my bones. Maybe I could sleep now, at least longer than a few hours.

A very small, minuscule amount of relief pinged through me. Alex was moving around, not trying to kill anyone, and no longer connected to Seth. Something to celebrate, right? No. What was walking around wasn’t really Alex. She couldn’t be that meek if she tried.

Fifteen minutes passed and the door slowly cracked open. A much cleaner Alex peeked out, clutching the robe’s collar, eyes downcast. She stepped into the bedroom, shifting from one foot to the next.

“I’m finished.”

I stood, staring at her—transported back to the day I’d brought her back to the Covenant and seen what lay beneath the grime and muck—the same maddening rush of feelings sucker-punched me.

Alex was beautiful—flawless—to me.

Her lashes lifted. Our eyes locked, and a sweet flush crept across her cheeks. My gaze dipped to her parted lips and a very different kind of hunger stirred. Before I knew what I was doing, I crossed the room, hands outstretched, reaching for her.

Alex darted back, her knuckles bleaching white. Confusion shot across her face as she sucked her lower lip between her teeth. Anxiety rolled off her as she stared back at me.

I stopped short, pulling my hands back. What was I thinking? She was… afraid of me—afraid of her Master. I cursed.

She jumped, eyes widening.

I’d never hated myself more. Clamping down on my emotions, I gave her space. “Stay here. I’ll find you some clothes.”

“Yes, Ma—”

“Don’t call me that.” My tone was harsher than I intended and I worked to soften it. “Call me Aiden. Okay?”

Alex nodded.

Tearing myself away from her, I headed to the door and glanced over my shoulder. My brows furrowed. She stood in the same spot, hands clenching the robe and eyes on the floor as if it was some sort of beacon. What the hell was she doing?

Then it struck me. I’d told her to stay. And she was staying. “Alex…”

“My name is Alexandria.”

“Okay.” I sighed, approaching her carefully. When I was sure she knew I was beside her, I cupped her elbow. “You don’t have to stand here. You can do whatever you want, Alex—Alexandria. Sleep. Or watch TV.” I nodded at the flat screen in the corner as I led her to the bed. “You can do as you wish. Okay?”

Sitting down, Alex nodded and watched me. “You’re coming back,

right?”

“Of course,” I assured her. She kept glancing around the room, growing more and more agitated. “I won’t be gone long at all. I promise.” Alex nodded again. “Okay, Ma…” She flinched. “Okay, Aiden.”

It didn’t take me long to find clothes for her. All of her things were still in the room next to mine. Marcus had already checked in, then disappeared back downstairs, and now Deacon hovered by the door.

Gathering up Alex’s clothes, I faced my brother. “What’s up?”

He leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms. “How’d it go?”

“She fought it, as expected, but it worked.” I sat on the arm of a chair, yawning. “She’s… she’s not like she was.”

“As in she’s not Evil Alex…?”

I shook my head. “She’s… just not—it’s only temporary.”

Deacon pressed his lips together. “That bad, huh?”

“I didn’t say it was bad.”

He arched a brow. “I know you, Aiden. Your disappointment—in yourself, not Alex—is written all over you. It’s practically dripping from your grubby face.”

My brows rose. “I’m grubby?”

“You’re kind of gross. Might want to think about shaving, too, unless you’re going for the homeless look with no chance of getting laid.”

I laughed and stood. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

A genuine smile, one that was so rare on my brother, parted his lips, though it quickly faded. “She’s going to be okay, right? I mean, someone will find a way to break the connection and she’ll be snarky-but-not-homicidal Alex in no time? They have to.”

My good humor vanished. A crack broke my control, shattered the weakened wall around me. “Gods, I hope so, Deacon. I can’t…”

“Live without her?”

Turning away, I didn’t answer because there was no need. “Has it always been that obvious?”

“Honestly?” Deacon laughed. “I knew you had a thing for her and her for you from the moment you came back from Atlanta and bitched me out. To me, it was obvious, but only because I know you. It’s funny, because she’s a half, but in a weird way she’s perfect for you, don’t you think?”

I smiled weakly. “Yeah, I think so.”

There was a pause and then he asked, “Even if all of us make it out of this alive and the gods don’t go all god-zilla on the world and she goes back to Team Aiden, how are you two going to get your happily ever after?”

“We’d leave. That was our plan. It would work. Apollo owes us.”

“No shit?” He sounded incredulous, not upset. “You’d give up being a Sentinel? Run off and try to live as mortals?”

Nodding, I faced him. Sadness congealed in my chest. “Yeah, that was our plan. I was going to tell you. We’d work something out so that you and—”

“Dude, I know you’d make sure I knew where to find you,” he said, blinking several times. “Damn, Aiden…”

“What?”

“It’s just… wow, I’m happy for you. I think this is great. It’s love—the real kind you make sacrifices for. The kind where you scream ‘screw it’ to everyone else. That’s envy-worthy.”

I arched a brow. “Not quite sure any part of my life is envy-worthy right now, considering that Alex thinks I’m her Master”

“Hey, you know, that could be—”

“Don’t even go there.”

“Okay. Okay. But it will get better.” His familiar gaze flicked up, meeting mine. “You’re doing okay, Aiden. Better than most would do in this… situation.”

“Thank you.” I smiled, shifting my bundle. “So are you.”

“I know.” Deacon grinned. “I’m just awesome.”

“And modest.” I stopped in front of him, lowering my chin. “Seriously, how are you holding up?”

He shrugged. “Been through worse, so don’t worry about me. You have enough on your plate.”

Not worrying about Deacon was going against nature. I’d spent the last decade of my life worrying about him—maybe a little too much. Smothering him instead of supporting him.

Deacon tipped his head back, suddenly looking much older than seventeen. “Go get some rest—shower first, though.” A quick flash of a grin appeared. “We’ve got the watch for now.”

I nodded, handing over the proverbial reins. Stopping at the bathroom door, I turned back to him. “Deacon?”

He brushed a curl out of his eyes. “Yeah?”

“I know about you and Luke, and I don’t care as long as you’re happy. Just do right by him, and you know what I mean.”

His mouth dropped open, and for once, it was me surprising my brother and not the other way around.

I didn’t even go into my bedroom, opting to place Alex’s clothes on a shelf and clean up first. After a long and hard look at myself in the mirror, I acknowledged I did look… grubby. Digging out a razor, I showered and then shaved quickly. A pair of clean pajama bottoms was tucked back away in the shelving, but no shirt. Hoping Alex didn’t freak out when she saw my bare chest, I opened the bathroom door.

And I came to a complete standstill.

Alex was curled on her side on top of the bedspread, her hands folded under her chin as if she was praying. Her lips were parted and rosy. Two curvy legs peeked out from under the robe, immediately drawing my attention. I’d always loved Alex’s legs.

She was fast asleep.

Setting her clothing on a nearby chair, I went to her side and called her name. She murmured something, and I felt a damn flutter—an actual flutter—in my chest. Very carefully, I placed another blanket over her legs. Either exhaustion or the Elixir had taken its toll on her. I pulled the cover up, tucking it around her.

Backing away from the bed, I left the room and stalked through the quiet house. Downstairs, off of the basement, was a small room that was nothing but four cinderblock walls. Someone had strung a punching bag from the ceiling.

Pent-up frustration and helpless anger reared its head, and a second later, my bare knuckles crashed into the worn, tough leather. I went crazy, and while each punch brought a spike of pain across my hand, I welcomed it.

Hours passed as I jabbed and kicked. Sweat poured off me, stinging my eyes and the torn skin along my knuckles. Physical pain did nothing to dampen the torment building inside me.

In a flash, I was taken back to the past summer, when I’d seen Alex doing the very same thing, after she’d discovered the truth about her mother. She had been a fierce, beautiful creature as she’d whirled around the practice dummy. A cyclone of raw emotions had reached out across the training room, tapping into my own mixed-up feelings. When she had sensed my presence and our gazes locked, as crazy as it sounded, I’d felt what she had.

Dragging in a ragged breath, I stopped and looked over my shoulder toward the door. Why I’d been expecting to find her standing there I’ll never know. Of course, the doorway was empty.

Alex was empty.

I went back upstairs, grabbed a towel from the dark bathroom and cleaned myself up. Back in the bedroom, I glanced at the oversized couch pushed up against the wall, and then grabbed a thin quilt off the end of the bed. Every cell in my body demanded to be close to her, but it seemed wrong. If she woke with me beside her, I was afraid it would upset and confuse her. That was the last thing I wanted. Easing down on my side, I spread the quilt out and watched her sleep until exhaustion pulled me under.